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  #1    
Old July 4th, 2013, 11:06 AM
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Okay so here we go..

First I want to start this thread with some ground rules:
- No judgement shall be passed in this thread, everybody thinks differently and they aren't necessarily wrong!
- If someone is wrong you may correct them with the utmost respect. They may not know otherwise.
- Do not be insensitive
- Do not be discriminative
- This is going to be as friendly and helpful as we can make it, everything will go smoother that way.

Now! This thread is going to be all about love and romance and all that soppy stuff. It is not a secret that it is incredibly difficult to know what the opposite sex wants and/or needs and that so, so many people struggle with it.
Here I want to discuss and hopefully unlock the secrets of romanticising a man or woman effectively by jumping straight in and gathering all the information in one place. We will be able to discuss, ask questions about, and give some much needed help concerning talking to potentially partners, ideal dating situations, how to tell if he/she likes you, and anything else you can think of.

I also would like to take this opportunity to acknowledge that everybody is different and that no one method is foolproof for every person.

Without any further adieu, let's get this rolling

Question time!!
- Do you think that women overcomplicate things when it comes to romantics and what they expect from men? Or do you think the fault lies with them for the complications?
- Do you think that instead, men oversimplify the needs of a woman? Or Vice versa
- What do you think is the easiest way for a man to approach a woman for the first time to say "hi"?
- What do you think is the best way for a woman to come up to a guy?
- What, in relationships do partners do that they may be unaware is bothering their partner and how can they be better boyfriends/girlfriends.
- Can you give any experience based advice for guys out there trying to understand women?
- Can you give any experience based advice for girls out there trying to understand men?


I'll leave it at that for now, if anybody has any extra questions that are relatable to everyone please ask additional questions in red and I will place them under the "Additional questions" section in this first post for people to answer. Let's have fun with this and try and solve the mysteries of the Universe together.


Additional Questions:
-

Last edited by Plumpyfoof; July 6th, 2013 at 02:16 AM. Reason: Asked the same question twice, awks.
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  #2    
Old July 4th, 2013, 05:09 PM
Kanzler
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Do you think that women overcomplicate things when it comes to romantics and what they expect from men? Or do you think the fault lies with them for the complications?

I dated a girl who was incredibly blunt and kept things simple. I was the overly complicated one.

Do you think that instead, men oversimplify the needs of a woman? Or Vice versa


I don't see it as complex vs. simple, I just see it as if they can be met or not. If you communicate, well everything is a lot more clear. I think people call things complex when they don't know the whole picture and are confronted with a problem they can't easily solve.

What, in relationships do partners do that they may be unaware is bothering their partner and how can they be better boyfriends/girlfriends.


It could be anything. Just talk about it and figure it out. That being said, intimacy has to be developed over time. I think the best thing to do is to play it by ear - and the best way to do that is to be true to both yourself and him/her and communicate.
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Old July 4th, 2013, 09:59 PM
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First, I want to say that I am female HAHAHA. Things I state here are purely observations and do not
apply to every single female on planet earth because everyone is different. Thought I should make that
clear. (*ノ・ω・)ノ

Do you think that women overcomplicate things when it comes to romantics and what they expect
from men? Or do you think the fault lies with them for the complications?

Yes, some women do overcomplicate things because they want men to offer them security and love in
a different way, I would say. They romanticise things a lot so when the outcome deviates too much
from what they had expected they'll be unhappy. Not the 'sad and depressed' unhappy or the 'I hate
you' unhappy. Actually they are unhappy with themselves for expecting too much. A hug would easily
solve the problem so guys, you know what to do. They also expect men to devote some time to
them. Not all, but at least a little!

I'd also suggest for the males to not read too deeply into what you think females are thinking because
I know of this guy who doesn't talk to girls with his girlfriend around. He's scared she'll be jealous and
stuff but really, she isn't. The boy loses friends and the girl's friends think that the tension in the air is
awkward so ultimately it is a lose-lose situation. This differs from girl to girl though.

What do you think is the best/easiest way for a man to approach a woman for the first time to say
"hi"?

Help her with something, like when she drops her stuff or when she doesn't know how to do her
homework. Don't just walk up to her and say hi straight in her face if she doesn't know you. You'll
scare her!

Other advice. (this goes to both male and female parties)
Please listen to what each other have to say and don't assume too many things! Girls please don't cut
the guys' sentences short and talk about your story it doesn't hurt to listen and the world doesn't
solely revolve around you. Thanks.

Just a note, do not mention her period if she is in a bad mood okay! ヾ(°д°)ノ゛

#1 She may just be having a bad day and you really don't want to make it worse for her.
#2 If she really is on her period then you're as good as gone.
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Old July 4th, 2013, 10:19 PM
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I think women are just different. I won't say they're all different, but most of them are somewhat. And that's a good thing! Being the same would lead to something I like to call


I can't say in relationships they're whatever they are, but I know from talking to some girls without the intent of making babies later that day (strange concept, I know!) that they're just like males, but with different social responsibilities. So I think if I ever get into a relationship I'll just treat them like I treat everybody else. Which is fair. If men are going to hate me, women might as well too.
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Old July 5th, 2013, 07:47 AM
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- Do you think that women overcomplicate things when it comes to romantics and what they expect from men? Or do you think the fault lies with them for the complications?
I think that is is more of a personal thing than a gender-based thing. In my last relationship I was the one who always over complicated things not my girlfriend. I believe it is a mistake to accept stereotypes like this as fact unless you are looking to be single shortly after the relationship begins.

- Do you think that instead, men oversimplify the needs of a woman? Or Vice versa
This is exactly the same situation as my above answer. It was certainly my girlfriend not me who viewed things in a far too simple manor but I don't think this applies to all of them in any way.

- What do you think is the easiest way for a man to approach a woman for the first time to say "hi
Just do it an hope for the best. If she turns out to be a sucky human being, leave it at "hi" and move on. If she seems decent try to start a conversation.

- What do you think is the best way for a man to come up to a girl?
How do you mean?

- What, in relationships do partners do that they may be unaware is bothering their partner and how can they be better boyfriends/girlfriends.
Everything.
There's no sure fire way of knowing what annoys a person without asking them and as every person is different you shouldn't just assume that something will be okay for everyone because it is for you or someone else you know.

- Can you give any experience based advice for guys out there trying to understand women?
- Can you give any experience based advice for girls out there trying to understand men?


I will say one thing here. The major point I have been trying to get across here is that most of these traits are very subjective and have little or nothing to do with gender. the only true way you will have any hope of "deciphering" the opposite gender is to stop looking at the gender as a collective and start considering the individual person. Yes, some things are more true of one gender than the other (and vice versa) but if you just assume these things to be the case your attempt at communicating is a failure before it has begun.
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Old July 5th, 2013, 08:55 AM
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You have people who have expectations based on the assumptions they've made and who don't communicate wondering why they don't understand men/women. It's because they didn't try or were able to get to know some people as individuals.

Advice: Don't assume you know everything about a person before you've talked to them. Talk to them and listen to what they say.
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Old July 6th, 2013, 02:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gimmepie View Post
- What do you think is the best way for a man to come up to a girl?
How do you mean?
Awks as I asked the same question twice, it was meant to be the other way around as to ask for both genders.

You guys have some really good answers here.
Life was simpler when all I thought girls wanted was fast cars a 6-pack and fat stacks. Of those three things i have 1/6.

I definitely think that especially females ask for gifts and things they want in a very unnecessarily complicated way. In my experience I find girls will say something implying that someone they know might be interested in say a dress or something nice but will wait 6 months to bring up with you the same dress and then imply that their previous implication actually counter-implied that it was in fact them that wanted the dress to begin with. By this time however I'm left thinking "What dress?".

It's not that I don't pay attention, it's that I have a bad memory, and she does it so often I lose track.

I think when people get comfortable in relationships they let themselves go, stop working out and eating healthy, don't shower as often, even re-wearing old stinky clothing. This very much upsets me because I'm attracted to good personal hygiene and people who take pride in their appearance.

My advice for guys, listen, take notes if you have to. Or at least pretend to listen. General good life advice: do just enough to get by, let no one expect highly of you and you won't disappoint them either.
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Old July 6th, 2013, 04:00 AM
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Really, all both sexes look for in a potential partner is someone that they can love, can cuddle with, and share intimate moments with. They want someone easy to talk to, who shares at least some interests and who they can confide in. Of course, attraction plays a great roll in getting two people together. But that alone isn't enough to sustain a relationship, unless all someone is looking for is a casual encounter (and for some that is actually enough).

Personally, I look for someone who is physically appealing, intelligent, has a great sense of humour and who also loves cuddling up on the couch to watch a movie.
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  #9    
Old July 9th, 2013, 04:14 PM
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- Do you think that Women over complicate things when it comes to romantics and what they expect from Men? Or do you think the fault lies with them for the complications?

Women, as a whole, tend to be more sensitive. Most of us require a steady amount of companionship and affection to feel loved.

- Do you think that instead, Men oversimplify the needs of a Woman?

Quite the opposite. From what I've seen, most Men think we demand more of them than we truly do. Example: A Husband and Wife discuss Valentines Day. The Husband is planning a big dinner date out with his Wife. Due to the media and common stereotypes, this is what he believes to be her wish. As for the Wife, all she wants is the night alone with her Husband.

- What do you think is the easiest way for a Man to approach a Woman for the first time to say "hi"?

Humor. Give us a good laugh and maybe a couple of smiles.

- What do you think is the best way for a Woman to come up to a Guy?

I can't say I know. And, I'm a happily taken Woman so I'm not going to find out.

- What, in relationships do partners do that they may be unaware is bothering their partner and how can they be better Boyfriends/Girlfriends.

The number one thing I hear other Women complain about: Their Boyfriends talk without thinking. A remark that a Man might not think anything of, could be eating away at a Woman.

- Can you give any experience based advice for Guys out there trying to understand Women?

Don't wait to show them you care. Spend everyday trying to make the one you love feel cared about.

- Can you give any experience based advice for Girls out there trying to understand Men?

Unfortunately, no.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 11:02 PM
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thefallendetective
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Hmm (✿◕‿◕)

What do you think males/females look for in their future partners?
I personally think that looks don't matter that much. What's of the utmost importance is a good
character! Personality does matter too but character definitely plays a bigger role. I mean, you can't
blame someone for being quiet by nature right?
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