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  #4126    
Old August 20th, 2013 (05:39 AM).
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I actually enjoy being single, it's refreshing not having to commit to anything too serious. It's always a laugh being able to go out with friends and get your fill of the local merchandise ;D

I've never been the biggest fan of relationships, but I can admit that it was nice being in one (the security, closeness was pretty amazing). I'm not sure whether I want to be in one anytime soon, but it's a possibility :3

It's amazingly weird, because I don't remember if I ever joined this club xD If I didn't, I'd like to!
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  #4127    
Old August 20th, 2013 (06:38 AM).
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I kind of owe my current life to Grindr. I'm sitting here in my nice apartment with two gay roommates all thanks to the magic that is Grindr. Without it I'd still be sitting at Mum's house waiting for some opportunity to find me instead of going out and seeking one.

And if my roommate would have just said yes, I could have said "I found my boyfriend on Grindr" too
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  #4128    
Old August 20th, 2013 (06:54 AM).
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Quote originally posted by Shining Raichu:
I kind of owe my current life to Grindr. I'm sitting here in my nice apartment with two gay roommates all thanks to the magic that is Grindr. Without it I'd still be sitting at Mum's house waiting for some opportunity to find me instead of going out and seeking one.

And if my roommate would have just said yes, I could have said "I found my boyfriend on Grindr" too
All I found on Grindr were old guys who wanted to pay me for things and guys my age that just wanted a fun night.

Sooooo. Grindr and I don't really like each other xD
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  #4129    
Old August 20th, 2013 (07:35 AM).
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My experience on both Grindr and Jack'd (the only two gay networking apps on my phone) haven't been the best. They've made me a little hesitant when it comes to the dating scene. I know some have had a good experience on them, which I was hoping would happen to me too, but it hasn't.. at least not yet lol. There seems to be two sets of people on the apps (at least from what I've experienced).. those who just want one-night stands, or those who really are sincere, but won't really continue any conversation you have with them. You ask them open-ended questions but the conversation ends up becoming very narrow. :\ It sucks for me especially because I'm already very introverted as it is. Obviously this isn't always the case with everyone on there, but I'm just some speaking from what I've experiened. GAHHHHH. I just want a LTR. Is that so hard to ask for? lol
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  #4130    
Old August 20th, 2013 (08:09 AM). Edited August 20th, 2013 by umbryan.
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Quote originally posted by Gyardosamped:
My experience on both Grindr and Jack'd (the only two gay networking apps on my phone) haven't been the best. They've made me a little hesitant when it comes to the dating scene. I know some have had a good experience on them, which I was hoping would happen to me too, but it hasn't.. at least not yet lol. There seems to be two sets of people on the apps (at least from what I've experienced).. those who just want one-night stands, or those who really are sincere, but won't really continue any conversation you have with them. You ask them open-ended questions but the conversation ends up becoming very narrow. :\ It sucks for me especially because I'm already very introverted as it is. Obviously this isn't always the case with everyone on there, but I'm just some speaking from what I've experiened. GAHHHHH. I just want a LTR. Is that so hard to ask for? lol
I know exactly what you mean! I just want a boyfriend I can cuddle with and hold hands with xD

It's def too much to ask for these days I guess

Just a PokéCommunity observation I'd like to make!

I was so impressed by the option of genderqueer on gender! It really made me feel that much more comfortable knowing that this must be a very accepting site when I first registered!

So kudos to PokéCommunity!:D
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  #4131    
Old August 20th, 2013 (12:39 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Moriarteh.:
It's amazingly weird, because I don't remember if I ever joined this club xD If I didn't, I'd like to!
Renee, you did you forgetful girl, here ya go for remembrance sakes:

Quote originally posted by Moriarteh.:
Ta, I would love to be a part of this, y'know

Eh, I live through the stance that if I'm attracted to someone romantically and physically, I don't particularly care what gender they identify as ~

Now, I'm not one to follow "guidelines", but if I were to use the terms you've listed on the front page, I'd say that I was pansexual xD

Also, PC is very LGBT friendly if anyone hasn't noticed yet, so yay? :D <3
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  #4132    
Old August 20th, 2013 (03:30 PM).
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Soooo who's recently gotten dumped? *raises hand*
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  #4133    
Old August 20th, 2013 (06:13 PM).
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I should really post more in here.

Anyways, as many of you here may not know, I'm trans (MtF, pre-everything). Even though I'm not transitioning at the moment (I'm too much of a wuss to outright tell my mother), I've been doing various things over the past six or seven years to help me look more girly. I've grown my hair out (and it's now currently just past my shoulders due to donating much of it some time ago), I stopped a nasty nail-biting habit by way of painting and filing, and I was blessed with a generally feminine figure.

Today was the best of these past years, between school troubles and my mother's emotional abuse, as I got ma'am'd, even while dressed in cargo pants and a loose T-shirt. I couldn't be happier, for hopefully obvious reasons, and now my mother is confused as to why I don't mind being called a girl. She's started making jokes (after a short insistence that I shouldn't feel complimented over being called a girl), but not in a mean manner.

I feel like I should be able to tell her soon, but I still can't find the courage necessary to do so without breaking down since her reaction is too unpredictable. T_T
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  #4134    
Old August 22nd, 2013 (09:38 AM).
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Songbird, I know how it is. I waited until I was 26 to come out to my parents because I was a giant coward. Telling my parents was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my entire life thus far. Here's the thing, though: waiting doesn't make it any easier and there's no such thing as waiting for a "good time." Eventually you'll realize that you need to just bite the bullet and go for it. Here's the unfortunate thing: when someone is just homosexual, they don't have a time limit but trans people do. Every single day that goes by, hormones do more irreversible damage. It sucks, but it's the truth.
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  #4135    
Old August 22nd, 2013 (09:41 AM).
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I wouldn't call it damage though. People aren't usually ready, although you will never be ready.
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  #4136    
Old August 22nd, 2013 (11:24 AM).
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Quote originally posted by BlahISuck:
I wouldn't call it damage though. People aren't usually ready, although you will never be ready.
In terms of transgender people, it is damage. We're talking about undesirable physical changes. You may be okay with having big muscles, body hair, and a deep voice, but it isn't pleasant for trans women.
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  #4137    
Old August 22nd, 2013 (03:25 PM). Edited August 22nd, 2013 by New Eden.
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It is damage. It can kill how you feel about your body when you finally decide to take action you may be happy with the results, but there could be regret of not starting sooner. I'm nineteen and I dunno how hormones were to me. My voice is rather deep (though noted as attractive by some), shoulders are kinda broad, and my hands/feet are pretty big. Right now all I can do is save what there is left to save (though it is a bit), which is a bummer. So yeah, it pretty much is damage.
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Old August 22nd, 2013 (03:43 PM).
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Most people, regardless of their sexual identities, don't have control over the way they look. I don't know if it's a blessing or a curse, but it is great power to have such a will to define your physical form. Most people won't even go there. I think it's a certain privilege to say that x body part is flawed and then go to say this is how it "should" look.
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Old August 23rd, 2013 (10:02 AM).
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It's not to say that certain types of bodies are flawed, but that there are certain body traits (shape and size of shoulders, hands, hips, etc.) that are big identifiers of masculinity or femininity. A transwoman isn't saying that women can't have any facial hair (which, for the record, most women have to some degree), but that they don't want facial hair for themselves as it is a sign of maleness.
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Old August 23rd, 2013 (11:28 AM).
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I'd definitely consider certain parts of being a man along the lines of damage, such as in terms of growth. Through hormone replacement therapy, some parts of a man's body is feminized. Fat and muscle will readjust themselves; skin will become softer; body hair will start growing thinner and less noticeable, though it will still take a procedure like electrolysis to get rid of it for good; their body in general will become more sensitive and feminine. Hormones can do quite a bit given time and dedication.

However, HRT isn't a miracle cure, just like sex reassignment surgery. A couple things about being a man are completely irreversible, at least without surgery (penis notwithstanding), and can be crucial to being seen as either a woman or a man as it's not how most women would ever develop. This is especially true for transwomen, as transmen typically only have to worry about a mastectomy and such.
  1. Skeletal structure. Bones will not readjust themselves as fat and muscle will in the case of transwomen. If you're tall, you're staying tall. Square chin? You're keeping it.
  2. Voice. Also only truly applicable to transwomen, a deep voice remains deep.

To rectify these issues, some transwomen go through facial feminization surgeries and vocal training; transmen grow into these through testosterone's influence. They can also get a tracheal shave if their practiced voice isn't convincing, or they just want their neck to bulge less, but this is still a rather unsafe procedure, and can have permanently damaging effects on their throat and voice alike.
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Old August 27th, 2013 (06:54 PM).
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Anyone else feeling lonely lately??
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  #4142    
Old August 27th, 2013 (07:27 PM).
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Sort of. I mean, my interest in wanting a relationships kinda fluctuates. I don't get real lonely though, being quite an introvert and all.
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Old August 27th, 2013 (07:35 PM).
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Quote originally posted by TéaQQ:
Sort of. I mean, my interest in wanting a relationships kinda fluctuates. I don't get real lonely though, being quite an introvert and all.
I actually know what you mean! My interest fluctuates too, but at the end of the day I usually always wouldn't mind a guy to cuddle with xD
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  #4144    
Old August 27th, 2013 (09:33 PM).
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I wish I could snuggle my lady >__< She is so beautiful. I hope I can visit her next summer, or as early as spring. If my parents will let me... e__e

I dunno if I'd say I'm lonely exactly, just...wanting to be near!
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  #4145    
Old August 27th, 2013 (09:36 PM). Edited August 27th, 2013 by The Dark Avenger.
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I for one think that everyone should be self-sufficient/independent and have realistic direction in life (not become a rockstar or live on disability), that is, know what their aspirations, and some, even if they are vague, goals in life, prior to starting a serious relationship.

I for one am not into the whole ephemeral relationships that are carefree and artificial "love yas" are thrown out there the entire month, if that, the relationship lasts. Though, these types of artificial relationships may last much longer, and that it especially why, for those who don't want this, to establish themselves in the ways described above to avoid being stuck in a one of these! Also, never date out of loneliness, that is another sure-fire way to end up here!

I am enjoying my two-year hiatus from dating, as of this month, and I feel as if I am more able to establish and accomplish my goals without having to deal with another person. This time in my life is about me, only. I would suggest others do the same at this juncture, assuming you are just a few years out of high school.

Though, I totally get what you guys are talking about. Having that physical contact with another person is a great and comforting feeling. I just know it's best not to rely on someone else for my happiness just yet. Though, the time is getting there. I will be ready by April, graduation. Classes started today, and the thought of graduating and moving has just become so much more real. I have devoloped this mindset over the duration of the past two year, and it's just a few more months, 8 or so, until I will be ready for a commitment, after diving back into the whole dating thing. The prospect is exciting. I have realized, it's not about raising your standards in those you date; rather, it's about raising the standards of ourselves first, and dating someone we feel that we deserve. I had a lower opinion of myself then, and dated accordingly, to what I thought that I deserved; though he was attractive, everything else was abysmal! So, that would be my ultimate advice. Date someone you feel like you deserve, and make yourself more deserving!
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  #4146    
Old August 27th, 2013 (10:57 PM). Edited August 28th, 2013 by apocalypseArisen.
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May I join? I'm pro LGBTS all the way. I'm a heterosexual male but can't find myself romantically right now. Well, I'm not sure of anything right now.

BTW, after reading, reading a lot xD, back in the thread I've concluded that you are all very intelligent, I' ve seen very intelligent discussions and arguments. Hopefully I can get some help here and help others as well.
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Old August 28th, 2013 (01:43 AM).
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Quote originally posted by Fenneking:
I for one am not into the whole ephemeral relationships that are carefree and artificial "love yas" are thrown out there the entire month, if that, the relationship lasts.
I agree People often start off a 'relationship' with a sprint, rather than a walk. They have a date, hang out a few times and are instantly together.

I knew/dated my current boyfriend for about a month before we were 'in a relationship' and now, 7 months later, we still are. Meanwhile, my friends who rushed too quickly are now doubting themselves. One lasted two months and the other got to about five.

Of course, everyone is different with that they want in a relationship (or if they want one at all) but I think there is way too much pressure to label someone your boyfriend/girlfriend preemptively... which can just lead to disappointment.

Welcome Omicron! :D
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  #4148    
Old August 28th, 2013 (02:51 AM). Edited August 28th, 2013 by umbryan.
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Quote originally posted by voltianqueen:
I wish I could snuggle my lady >__< She is so beautiful. I hope I can visit her next summer, or as early as spring. If my parents will let me... e__e

I dunno if I'd say I'm lonely exactly, just...wanting to be near!
Awwwwzzz! I hope so too! That must be tough! Does she like live on campus?

Quote originally posted by Fenneking:
I for one think that everyone should be self-sufficient/independent and have realistic direction in life (not become a rockstar or live on disability), that is, know what their aspirations, and some, even if they are vague, goals in life, prior to starting a serious relationship.

I for one am not into the whole ephemeral relationships that are carefree and artificial "love yas" are thrown out there the entire month, if that, the relationship lasts. Though, these types of artificial relationships may last much longer, and that it especially why, for those who don't want this, to establish themselves in the ways described above to avoid being stuck in a one of these! Also, never date out of loneliness, that is another sure-fire way to end up here!

I am enjoying my two-year hiatus from dating, as of this month, and I feel as if I am more able to establish and accomplish my goals without having to deal with another person. This time in my life is about me, only. I would suggest others do the same at this juncture, assuming you are just a few years out of high school.

Though, I totally get what you guys are talking about. Having that physical contact with another person is a great and comforting feeling. I just know it's best not to rely on someone else for my happiness just yet. Though, the time is getting there. I will be ready by April, graduation. Classes started today, and the thought of graduating and moving has just become so much more real. I have devoloped this mindset over the duration of the past two year, and it's just a few more months, 8 or so, until I will be ready for a commitment, after diving back into the whole dating thing. The prospect is exciting. I have realized, it's not about raising your standards in those you date; rather, it's about raising the standards of ourselves first, and dating someone we feel that we deserve. I had a lower opinion of myself then, and dated accordingly, to what I thought that I deserved; though he was attractive, everything else was abysmal! So, that would be my ultimate advice. Date someone you feel like you deserve, and make yourself more deserving!
You sound so robotic and cold xD "I love yas" and stuff are what make relationships fun xD

Quote originally posted by Omicron:
May I join? I'm pro LGBTS all the way. I'm a heterosexual male but can't find myself romantically right now. Well, I'm not sure of anything right now.

BTW, after reading, reading a lot xD, back in the thread I've concluded that you are all very intelligent, I' ve seen very intelligent discussions and arguments. Hopefully I can get some help here and help others as well.
Welcome! And from what I've been told, the joining process is very informal. All you basically do is introduce yourself, get involved here in discussion, and Shining Raichu will recognize you and put your name on the list.

Quote originally posted by Magic Fox:
I agree People often start off a 'relationship' with a sprint, rather than a walk. They have a date, hang out a few times and are instantly together.

I knew/dated my current boyfriend for about a month before we were 'in a relationship' and now, 7 months later, we still are. Meanwhile, my friends who rushed too quickly are now doubting themselves. One lasted two months and the other got to about five.

Of course, everyone is different with that they want in a relationship (or if they want one at all) but I think there is way too much pressure to label someone your boyfriend/girlfriend preemptively... which can just lead to disappointment.

Welcome Omicron! :D
Everyone's different and every relationship is different. I've dated guys and the chemistry and attraction was just so high and others, it took longer to gain chemistry. And I can honestly say that neither one of those two situations had a higher success rate than the other.

And I love yous are fine, you just need to get to a point where you mean it.
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Old August 28th, 2013 (01:40 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Fenneking:
I for one think that everyone should be self-sufficient/independent and have realistic direction in life (not become a rockstar or live on disability), that is, know what their aspirations, and some, even if they are vague, goals in life, prior to starting a serious relationship.
I think that's why people's first relationships usually don't work out in the end, 'cuz lots of first relationships happen when you're young and still figuring out your future.

Heck, I know a few people in their 20s and 30s who still don't have their futures figured out and are having dating issues because of it.
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Old August 28th, 2013 (08:09 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Scarf:
I think that's why people's first relationships usually don't work out in the end, 'cuz lots of first relationships happen when you're young and still figuring out your future.

Heck, I know a few people in their 20s and 30s who still don't have their futures figured out and are having dating issues because of it.
I used to think I would be some bigshot lawyer or guitar player.

I decided on herpetologist. I recently discovered this passion and it's lasted way longer than anything else. I think maybe a vet (reptile specialist) would be a good idea but I've heard it's very hard to get into these days. :(

Everyone I've dated, however, still has cliche answers like: puppy vet, guitar player, football star, cheerleader for the basketball team, super famous author, famous anime drawer lady, etc.
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