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  #676    
Old March 30th, 2014 (05:44 PM).
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Ardor123 Ardor123 is offline
 
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I'll submit my character tomorrow hopefully.
  #677    
Old March 31st, 2014 (01:21 PM). Edited March 31st, 2014 by Songbird.
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Just a note: Things are being moved along, and class starts at 8:00. Make sure your characters are in class, time-skipped to class, or otherwise heading there so they can embarrass themselves by trying to sneak in during demonstrations.
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  #678    
Old April 5th, 2014 (05:44 PM).
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Ardor123 Ardor123 is offline
 
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Name: Ardor Arkwright

Nickname:

Age: 15

Gender: Male

Element: Metal

Spells:
King’s Shield- Allows Ardor to create a wall of metal in front of him but takes a lot of energy to do so and it can only last a few minutes at a time.
Rightful King- It covers Ardor’s hands with a thin but powerful piece of armor.


Appearance: Ardor is almost always wearing a full length trench coat that is zipped up all the way but he still able to run in it. Underneath the trench coat, on the few occasions that he takes it off, there’s a long-sleeved black shirt, black jeans and boots. If he ever decides not to wear his trench coat he always wears a hoodie with a griffin on the front. He is a very strong guy being able to carry over 200 pounds of weight, he weighs 170 pounds and is 5’ 9’’ tall with long dark brown hair that reaches his lower back. Ardor also has a mask, his favorite one is a mask is a mask that looks like Rorschach’s from the Watchmen, that he wears everyday because of a philosophy that he was taught by his step father which was nobody wants to see his face but underneath that mask he has an eye patch over his left eye and a scar going from the upper right hand corner of his face going down to the lower left hand corner.

Personality: Ardor can be very nice if you get to know him. He’s socially awkward and prefers to be by himself rather than hanging out with other people. He finds some human emotions baffling such as love and greed. You are most likely to find him in his room if there are too many people around places he likes to hide. He can be shy if someone comes up to talk to him but he will get nicer if you persist in talking to him. He also likes to keep his friends safe and if you are one of them, he will defend you with his entire being.

History: Ardor has had a fairly good life. As we grew up he did get bullied a lot and one day he was building a set for his school’s play a nail slipped and impaled his eye and from then on he wore the mask and coat. When he was nine his grandfather died and his dad became an abusive drunk. His mom ended up leaving with him and they moved to a far away city where then he discovered his powers. One day as he walked through a construction site small pieces of metal reacted to him and he learned to make the shield but his mother didn’t like it and sent him to foster care where his foster family took good care of him and there was a mancer who taught him how to use his powers. During his time there, his sister had to protect him because he had anger issues and if he got mad, he would kill. He then got so dependent on his sister to the point that he cannot talk to other people. During one incident his sister was killed in a car accident and Ardor shut himself away from the world. His parents and his one best friend tried to coax him out of his isolation but with no avail. One day he got the letter to go to Vale Academy and he went as a hope to cure himself of his social awkwardness.

Code: Challenge me!

Other: (For anything not included in the other categories)
  #679    
Old April 5th, 2014 (06:56 PM). Edited April 5th, 2014 by Songbird.
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Our response is complete. Probably not as polite as it should be, but...

Quote originally posted by Ardor123:
I am sure I can handle this roleplay, but thanks for the advice.
You said you could handle it. Also, if you've read through the rest of the OOC (which I'm almost positive you didn't), you'd know that you won't find the kindest of Roleplay Corner reviews in this thread. We really don't want to discourage you from the RPC, or roleplaying as a whole. This is simply how I (and by extension, Colony) conduct character sheet reviews. Many GMs are much, much nicer.

If Magic/Skymin comes in and finds it too offensive, I'll remove the review.

Basically, there are a lot of things that need to be dealt with before we can accept him. Literally all of it below the Element section, though I'm sure he'll get bullied for the name.

My comments are in red, and Colony's comments are in blue.

Spoiler:
Name: Ardor Arkwright Like I said, he's probably gonna get bullied for the name. Just something to keep in mind if we actually accept him.

Age: 15

Gender: Male

Element: Metal

Spells:
King’s Shield- Allows Ardor to create a wall of metal in front of him but takes a lot of energy to do so and it can only last a few minutes at a time. This spell is overall okay, but it's really lackadaisical. There's no creativity to it whatsoever, and painfully basic. How does he expect to protect himself if he wastes 80% of his energy on one extremely simple spell?
Rightful King- It covers Ardor’s hands with a thin but powerful piece of armor. We have no idea where you're going with this. Is it supposed to be a pair of metal gloves? Also, for the most part, we use real life physics; thin≠powerful. If he hits anything with it, it will probably break.

Appearance: Ardor is almost always wearing a full length trench coat that is zipped up all the way but he still able to run in it. Right off the bat, you're telling us he's a massive tool. Underneath the trench coat, on the few occasions that he takes it off, there’s a long-sleeved black shirt, black jeans and boots. So he's a scene tool that somehow doesn't burn to a crisp in the summer. If he ever decides not to wear his trench coat he always wears a hoodie with a griffin on the front. Tool~.He is a very strong guy being able to carry over 200 pounds of weight, he weighs 170 pounds and is 5’ 9’’ tall with long dark brown hair that reaches his lower back This conflicts with literally everything in his history. For a bullied, emo, "socially awkward" tool, how is he possibly capable of lifting anything near his own weight, and especially anything over it?. Ardor also has a mask, his favorite one is a mask is a mask is a mask is a mask is a mask, it goes on and on AND ON AND ON. STRANGERS, WAITING, UP AND DOWN THE BOULEVARD~. SHADOWS, SEARCHIN' IN THE NIIIIIGHT that looks like Rorschach’s from the Watchmen Lame and has no reason whatsoever to exist., that he wears everyday because of a philosophy You clearly have "philosophy" and "opinion" confused. that he was taught by his step father Where the hell did HE come from? which was nobody wants to see his face but underneath that mask he has an eye patch over his left eye and a scar going from the upper right hand corner of his face going down to the lower left hand corner.

Overall, the appearance is practically the poster boy for the crappiest melodramatic TV show on the planet. I want to kick his ass!

Personality: Ardor can be very nice if you get to know him. He’s socially awkward and prefers to be by himself rather than hanging out with other people. He finds some human emotions baffling such as love and greed. Why does he not understand? You are most likely to find him in his room if there are too many people around places he likes to hide. What? He can be shy if someone comes up to talk to him but he will get nicer if you persist in talking to him. We repeat: What? He also likes to keep his friends safe and if you are one of them, he will defend you with his entire being.

How does ANY of this possibly work? It's incoherent. He doesn't understand "human emotions", but he's a capricious loner (which I completely hate, by the way) with these very emotions POURING from every orifice ad nauseum. Shyness for no reason, obsession and love for other people for no reason. Is he supposed to be autistic or overly expressive?

History: Ardor has had a fairly good life. As we grew up he did get bullied a lot Why was he bullied? and one day he was building a set for his school’s play a nail slipped and impaled his eye and from then on he wore the mask and coat. Crappy melodrama poster boy here! MTV, that's your cue! When he was nine his grandfather died and his dad became an abusive drunk. Just no. His mom ended up leaving with him and they moved to a far away city where then he discovered his powers. Where, exactly, did they go? Location gives a character culture. He has none. One day as he walked through a construction site small pieces of metal reacted to him and he learned to make the shield What shield? You only mention a wall in his spells. but his mother didn’t like it and sent him to foster care where his foster family took good care of him, Why would she send him somewhere NICE instead of report him to the authorities or some BS that gets him abused even MORE? and there was a mancer who taught him how to use his powers. How convenient! During his time there, his sister Where the hell did SHE come from? had to protect him because he had anger issues and if he got mad, he would kill. Great life ya got going on here! He then got so dependent on his sister to the point that he cannot talk to other people. That's not dependency. That's BS. During one incident his sister was killed in a car accident and Ardor shut himself away from the world. His parents and his one best friend How does he have a best friend? Or parents? Do you mean his FOSTER parents? tried to coax him out of his isolation but with no avail. One day he got the letter to go to Vale Academy Did you even bother reading the title of the RP? and he went as a hope to cure himself of his social awkwardness. What?

I'll list it all out:
  • Bullied constantly.
  • Got a nail in his eyeball that inexplicably scarred his entire face.
  • His dad turned into an abusive drunk because his grandfather died, as if there were any worse reasons to turn into a jerkass alcoholic, and he has a stepfather that was mentioned once in the APPEARANCE and never popped up again.
  • He had anger issues for literally no reason whatsoever.
  • He has a sister that was never mentioned until AFTER he gets sent to a foster home, and apparently she keeps him from KILLING PEOPLE WITH A SHIELD.
  • His sorry excuse of a sister never tried to deal with those alleged bullies before. Maybe SHE was bullying him for being such a capricious loner! I don't know! You never said anything! Maybe she jumped in front of the car to get away from him! I would.
  • And now he wants to "cure" his alleged "social awkwardness" in a school where students regularly kill each other while training their extremely powerful magical abilities. Great idea, champ. You're sure to be free of bullies there with your trench coat and mask.

Overall, nothing connects properly. Nothing is thoroughly thought-out or considered. It's like you threw in every possible thing you could think of to make it as pathetic as possible (which makes me hate the crap out of him) except the kitchen sink falling on Ardor's mother's head and killing her before his birth, forcing doctors to give her a C-section five weeks before his due date to save his life, all without actually putting two and two together.



Spells: Rightful King: I don't understand where you were going with this spell. It's very inconsistent in that a thin piece of metal is not powerful. Remember, the magic is this universe is still based on realistic physics, so thin =/= power.

Appearance: I really hate getting ahead of myself, but after reading Ardor’s history and appearance, I think I know why he was bullied. Trench coats aren’t exactly normal, and I can’t help but think that Ardor’s bullies thought something really negative about Ardor wearing one. Now, on to something that actually matters (but seriously, trench coats make people look like jerks, so please reconsider), Ardor’s specs don’t match up with his physicality. There must be a clear, logical reason as to why he is so strong. Also, the face disfigurement, the mask (partly), and the grandfather’s “philosophy (which is never even explained)” just don’t really fit once you see our suggestions on the history.

Personality: First and foremost, why does he not understand human emotions? I know you mention that he’s socially awkward, but even that doesn’t really explain an inability to understand human emotion, especially something as simple as greed. Also, how is it that Ardor displays an emotion that he can not fathom (ie: love, since he shows a type of love towards his friends)? There’s just a lot of inconsistency here, and it makes me wonder what you really wanted for your character…

History: Well, the history is definitely the area that needs the most changing. Once again, there’s a lot of inconsistency in the history. Literally, you start off with either a sarcastic comment or just a complete lie. I mean, you say Ardor was happy, but he was constantly bullied, got a nail through his eye (which is silly to begin with), his father miraculously became an abusive drunk, and his sister died in a car wreck. Please don’t attempt to justify these melodramatic statements, it’d be easier to just change them and actually develop the character instead of tossing a lot of dramatic problems and passing them off as happy. Oh, and why is his sister only mentioned towards the very end of his history? Wouldn’t it make sense for his family members to be mentioned way before their death (also applies to his “one best friend”)? You mention he has anger issues, but why isn’t it mentioned in the personality? If Ardor wants to cure his “social awkwardness,” then why is he going to a school specialized in magic and not going to some sort of psychologist? I’m really at a loss as to what your goals are in designing Ardor, but it doesn’t seem like he’s been properly thought out.
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  #680    
Old April 5th, 2014 (10:41 PM).
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Ardor123 Ardor123 is offline
 
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Thank you for the road map.
  #681    
Old April 8th, 2014 (02:25 AM). Edited April 17th, 2014 by Cosmic Fury.
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Cosmic Fury Cosmic Fury is offline
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Name: Tiberius Drake

Nickname: None

Age: 15

Gender: Male

Element: Fire/Earth

Spells:
Spoiler:


Eruption: Eruption causes a small section of earth (about 3' in diameter) to briefly soften, then violently blast out in all directions like a landmine going off. It's used to deal damage to everything nearby, and slowly deprive Tiberius' opponent of solid ground to stand on. Eruption's effectiveness depends on how far the target area is from Tiberius, as well as the target ground's density. Put simply, the farther away and more packed his target is, the more energy he'll waste. He's also very capable of injuring himself, should he be too close to the explosion.

Sunburn: Using his fire, Tiberius leaves a scorch mark with either his hands or feet. Using this mark, he can remotely set off a harsh 5' blast of fire that damages everything around it, and consumes the scorch mark. This blast is indiscriminate, and can hit more than just the intended target if the wrong person comes too close. Also, this mark can be washed or rubbed off -- or even blasted away with his own magic. So, he has to remember where he leaves them.

Explosion: A brief but very powerful explosion of fire and rock, blasting from the ground around the user. This spell causes an inferno to bathe everything around the user in an intense fire, as well as rain down burning rock and dirt around the user. The spell tends to end as rapidly as it started, because of the immense amount of power and energy that both go into (and out of) this spell.

Even if this spell is powerful, it is also extremely indiscriminate. Both the burning rocks and the fire will fly in every conceivable direction around the user, and it will strike (and burn) anything that it's physically able to. In addition, its relatively short range (stemming from a lack of sufficient energy) is also a hindrance. As a result, this spell is usually a last-ditch defense measure, meant for when he's (quite literally) cornered by someone else.

This spell severely hurts Tiberius nearly as much as his target, due to the sheer force of the ground erupting literally beneath his feet. Because of this, Explosion is simply that one spell Tiberius will not use unless his life (or limbs) quite literally depended upon its use.


Appearance:
Spoiler:

A rather skinny person, he stands at about 5'7". He knows he isn't the tallest person around, and he certainly isn't the strongest. Instead, to compensate he attempts to dress well, and at least keep up with his own looks, by any means necessary.

Overall, he looks average -- just a little more polished up than most. Being a fairly vain person, he always desires the nice things, and that's exactly what you would see him wearing after school.

Usually, one would find him (ironically) wearing solid colors, like strong shades of blue or green, always paired with black pants while at school... if he's not wearing black entirely.

For some reason, he always avoids bright colors, likely because he washes his clothes often, as they always smell like ash at the end of the day. On top of that, they probably end up with light ash stains on them as well after he pulls off a stronger spell.



Personality:
Spoiler:
Timid and passive, Tiberius tends to be lost in thought, always trying to think before he speaks. As such, he tends to come off as quiet. While he's not actually weak, he's definitely a softie. The only way you can consistently get him to display his abilities aggressively (be it magical or with a speech) is if you corner him like a rat or provoke him about something he's particularly passionate about.

As he took after his mother, he grew to love reading books, and has spent a lot of his life in pursuit of knowledge, for the purpose of sharpening his mind. While his father didn't necessarily approve of him "idling about" for much of his free time, it at least kept him out of trouble, and out of sight when his presence wasn't welcome. He rarely got out much (unless it was with his few friends), and he was rarely seen without something occupying his mind (unless you see him on that time of day he's running parkour with his nerdy friends).


History
Spoiler:
"Strong" would have been a great word to describe most members of the prominent Drakes, a family of powerful geomancers. They were known for their prowess and skill, as well as their sheer durability when it came to combat.

However, they are also known to a select few as being the descendants of the powerful geomancer Elijah Drake, who was responsible for setting off an atomic bomb on Japan at the end of WWII. Some even suspected that he himself WAS the bomb.

Regardless of the speculation, this event (whether it actually happened or not) haunted the family for generations. Carl Tiberius, Elijah Drake's son, was known for his strong sense of honor. He did all he could to restore the family's pride, so that when people looked at a Drake, their first impression would be of the one they saw, not their infamous ancestor.

Charles was Carl's eldest son, and he proved to be just as much of a Drake as the rest of the family. He was strong, powerful, skillful, and unrelenting with his goals. Typical of a Drake, he put his own personal honor and pride before the family's. As such, when his father finally told him what his grandfather did... and he didn't care, and stated as much. This event triggered a falling out that would never truly be repaired, and Charles has regretted it to this day.

Tiberius's mother, on the other hand, was an oddity for her family. Well after WWII had ended, Tricia Smith was the first in her family to use magic, shortly before entering high school. After a flaming outburst after school one day, Tricia was picked up by a classmate named Jon to control her pyromancy, and he seemed unnaturally knowledgeable about the powers she displayed. He introduced her to his family, and Jon's aging father turned out to be a medic during the war, and became one of America's forerunners in the utilities of fire magic. Jon was set to take over his father's school as a teacher. During her training, Tricia grew intimate with Jon, but they had broken things off some time after graduation. Tricia later met Charles, who was drowning himself in his own family's past at the time, and built her life with him.

______________________________________

Their son, Tiberius, was named after his grandfather. Much to Charles' disappointment (or jealousy), Tiberius took after his mother, who retained her admiration of Jon's family and their focus on rapid, disorientating attacks. As a result, even though his primary skill grew to be in earth magic, his magic developed for quick and efficient movements, simple spells and constantly disrupting opponents. These were nothing like the brute force Charles used.

Still, Tiberius' father persisted in teaching his son about strength and endurance, and years of training bore fruit in the form of high-powered streams of fire. Charles wasn't a fan, but he took what he could get. With the control Tiberius had, he grew happy with his life, even if his father wasn't proud of him.

After he turned 15, he received a letter from Vale, asking for his attendance and the things he'd learn there, as well as the hardships he'd face as a mage. Tricia was reluctant to let her son go, but Charles was all too eager to send him off. His parting words to Tiberius were, "If I can't teach you strength, a school made for mages will. And if they can't, they'll break you. Literally and legally."


Other:
Spoiler:
In addition to his spells, there are a few noteworthy strengths (and accompanying weaknesses) that come along with his abilities. First and foremost is his very high resistance to heat and fire in general. While he can tolerate it to a very high degree, his clothes still get burnt and scorched just the same.

On the other hand, he has zero immunity to his own Earth magic. If he triggers an eruption too close to himself, it will hurt him as well as his target, unless he's armored against it -- which usually isn't the case. (This is especially true with his Inferno. The main thing that hurts him is the rocks.)

Rain and other very wet things are a one-way ticket to disaster for him. All you need is a good splash of cold water to completely neuter his fire. Keep him cold, dripping, and wet, and it's all over.


Code: Challenge me!!!
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  #682    
Old April 8th, 2014 (03:23 AM). Edited April 8th, 2014 by Songbird.
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It seems to be progressing well, Fury. I just have a couple questions/notes that shouldn't particularly make things take longer to finish.
  • Why is his name Dragonstone? The RP takes place in a modern Earth setting, regardless of magical aspects, so naming is going to be otherwise normal. The name is acceptable (pushing it, but acceptable), but only if there's a good reason for that to be his last name. (For example, he has eccentric/stupid parents. There are a lot of stupid, yet completely legal, names that people actually use.) Maybe consider something like Drakeson? Or another normal-sounding name? :3
  • Fire Blast seems like it's just a more power-fed version of Ignition, at least how I read it. So, you could actually combine them into a single spell to make room for another.
  • Don't know how you'd work Earth magic into it, but if you come up with something, Colony and I are all ears.
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  #683    
Old April 9th, 2014 (03:07 AM). Edited April 9th, 2014 by Cosmic Fury.
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Cosmic Fury Cosmic Fury is offline
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Thanks for the feedback! My responses are below.

1. Yeah, I've actually thought a bit about it, and I figured out another name for him -- Drake will suffice. It's simple, and it fits the whole "fire" theme anyway.

2. I've given considerable thought into this, and I've been brainstorming on spells to replace Ignition... I might have landed on a good idea or two that I'll be implementing in the next edit of my post.

3. For the whole Fire/Earth combo, I wanted to pursue something both original and something that I was at least a bit comfortable with going with. After skimming through the other possibilities involving Fire, I decided that this was likely the best route for me to take with this -- especially for the family history I've got in mind for my character.


I know my app is likely going to require quite a lot of butchering before it's actually "complete," so I would love to discuss this with you over either PM's or Skype (if you have it). I'd love to expand my creative writing skills to more advanced levels, and I would very much appreciate the help.

EDIT: I changed up his spells, as well as changed their names to suit their roles better. Also, you'll see how I worked his Earth element into his spells by changing the effects of "Inferno," as well as adding "Eruption" (listed in red) to his list of spells, instead of Ignition.
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The Tale of a Wanderer -- Reboot coming in the future

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  #684    
Old April 9th, 2014 (03:28 AM).
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Colony and I would be glad to help in any way we can. You can find my Skype info on my profile, so go ahead and add me, and I'll add back as soon as I can get on my computer. Just make sure to tell me it's you. ;3
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  #685    
Old April 10th, 2014 (08:28 PM).
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Colony Colony is offline
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Okay, so it's been a few days since the teacher post was posted, and we wanted to see if anybody is planning on posting before we continue the class. So, is anybody currently working on, readying, or thinking about making a post? If not, then we'll progress the class.
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More to come, but they're in the works. Also, if you like what you see and want one just ask. It's not like I've got anything better to do (other than write posts).
  #686    
Old April 11th, 2014 (05:10 AM).
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I say progress, I'm assuming Sytano made it to class on time after all.
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  #687    
Old April 11th, 2014 (08:21 AM).
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You can progress it. I don't have much to do with Alma at the moment, and that way I can just post something sometime over next week (spring break).
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  #688    
Old April 11th, 2014 (12:56 PM). Edited April 13th, 2014 by Songbird.
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No one wants to ask the cowboy any questions?

Alright, then, we'll have the first lesson posted up soon.

Today: fire. It cooks our food, but why does it hurt when we touch it? Does it hate us? How can we please it?

Also, Fire magic.
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  #689    
Old April 15th, 2014 (11:36 AM).
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Geras32 Geras32 is offline
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Hey, SU for you guys.

Spoiler:

Domingo Hernández, Male Geomancer Age 17


Spells:


Construction: Domingo can break down the earth around him and compress it to create objects. Can be used to prevent someone from getting a stable footing, such as turning stone into sand; make it easier for him to move around, or swim through the earth like it was water; create a hammer or shield, or even armor himself in stone. He doesn't have much of an eye for detail, so he can't make something really fancy like a snake made of dirt.

Dig: By compacting a large amount of the ground into surrounding mineral, Domingo can near-instantly open a hole, even from a distance. It's much easier to do with less dense material, such as sand.

Seismic Sense: When Domingo is grounded, he can feel the pulses of the earth, giving him two abilities: to feel exactly where anything else grounded (or underground) is within an area roughly the length of a football field in all directions, and information about the material within this area such as density of the materials in the ground. He can then use this information to escape underground using his Construction spell, or perform more precise attacks.



Appearance: While in his old life Domingo’s appearance was a common sight, he stands out quite drastically in the halls of Vale. Oversized pants, a shaved head, and an abundance of tattoos depicting various names, numbers, and symbols all tied to his past self are the telltale signs of Domingo’s status as a former gang member. Scars litter his medium-brown body from knife and gunshot wounds. He is fairly tall at 6’1”, and his decently muscular frame brings him to 181 lbs., which makes him a fairly intimidating person. Adding on to this impression are his strong, square jaw and his low eyebrows over sunken brown eyes.

Domingo currently only owns one set of clothes. Aside from the aforementioned excessively large pants, which are tattered and faded less-than-blue jeans, he also wears dark green sneakers that are in no better condition than his jeans, with once-white laces that have long since lost their plastic ends, and a relatively new black hoodie which he uses to hide the more impressionable features of his body. In terms of accessories, Domingo wears none. However, he owns a silver stud earring that he no longer has any desire to wear.

Personality: Despite the intimidating air he no doubt gives off, he makes an effort to try and be nice and friendly to others. However, he has a very short fuse which doesn’t go well with the ignorance that comes with being alien to the United States’ culture as well as his own stubborn attitude. If something frustrates him, he will make it known and abandon any attempts at niceties. This state of anger tends to be a temporary thing, and once he restores his calm he will often try to apologize. The problem then is that most won’t give him the time for another conversation after one of his outbursts.

With most of his life having been consumed by work, and the final portion of it consumed by what he would call Hell on Earth, Domingo has never really had a chance for a proper childhood. Because of this, he was never able to outgrow childish things, so he still holds a secret fascination with cartoons, games, and toys among other things.

When in a fight, Domingo is prone to losing control and going farther than he should. He struggles to shake the habits of the kill or be killed world from whence he came, something that will be even more difficult in a combat-centric institute such as Vale.

History:
Domingo Hernández was born in a small village in El Salvador, living his early life quite normally. Doing work at home such as fetching water from the river or chopping firewood, taking long walks to the school in a nearby town, playing soccer and other games with his friends, and dreaming of a future in the United States of America. His parents saved what little money they made to send their children to that land of opportunity and riches, and as Domingo was the oldest of his six siblings he would naturally be the first one to go once enough had been saved. To make sure Domingo had a better chance at success, his parents contacted a family friend who knew English, having learned much from the wondrous thing that is the internet. This friend would visit every so often to teach the language to the boy, and while he struggled at first he eventually picked up the basic rules and trends of the language, letting the rest come relatively easy.

As a child, Domingo was a great fan of cartoons featuring superheroes and the like. Thus, when one day he discovered his Geomancy on a walk back from school, he was understandably excited. Unfortunately, he was also young and naive. Latin America is a very Christian place with conservative attitudes. Domingo yet had little knowledge of his own religion beyond the commandments and basic biblical tales, so he had yet to understand what his magic would mean to his parents. He displayed his new talent for his parents with a proud smile on his face, one which quickly faded at the sound of his mother and father hysterically calling him a witch.

The sting of his father’s belt was nothing new to Domingo, but this time it was different. What normally left him with no more than a few red marks that faded in a few hours this time left multiple scars over his body. It was a quick event that ended when Domingo repented for his sins. His parents were very distressed and went to seek out the local priest. Domingo was afraid that his parents might somehow discover that he could still perform his magic when they returned, so, in fear of another such beating he ran away. Knowing that his siblings might try to stop him, he wasted no time with packing and left with nothing.

Domingo left home at age 9 and wandered for a while, living off fruit he picked off the country’s abundant vegetation. It was enough to keep him alive, at least. He eventually happened upon a sand quarry and its kind owner and found unofficial work doing miscellaneous tasks for a few dollars a day. He stayed there for years, eventually being officially hired when he was older. While he was there, surrounded by rocks and sand, he would practice his Geomancy whenever he was alone. In the 8 years Domingo spent at that quarry, his dream of America remained strong. Throughout the entire time, he saved money until he finally had enough to pay a coyote, a smuggler, for passage to the United States.

Leaving the quarry after so long, Domingo sought out a coyote. Being in such high demand, it only took a little investigating to find one. Things proceeded as expected, with Domingo ending up broke and suffocating in a train car full of others like him, travelling across Mexico on their way to their new lives.

They didn’t make it halfway through Mexico before the train was brought to an abrupt halt. The people inside the cars were dragged out by members of one of the country’s drug cartels. What happened after was something Domingo would rather not remember, but it resulted in many dead bodies and with Domingo and several other young men as new members in the gang's ranks. Those of Domingo’s crop, kidnappees forced into the gang, were constantly beaten and subjected to incredibly risky assignments. Domingo’s fear of death was what got him there instead of with the dead bodies from the train, and it, alongside subtle use of his Geomancy that was passed off as coincidence, also helped him survive those early days with the gang.

Domingo spent several months with the gang, slowly rising up the ranks and eventually acquiring a reputation for the mysterious fortune that surrounded him and brought him success. However, he did not want any of it. His will to continue committing atrocities wore thin as time passed, and eventually he could stand it no longer. Resolving to leave that life he now felt he never should have joined in the first place, he began a trek North one night. However, the cartels have eyes all over Mexico, and it didn’t take long before he was found out.

Members of the gang were sent after him to properly “dismiss” him from the gang. At this point, Domingo would be pursued by law enforcers and lawbreakers alike, and his friends and family were far behind. He no longer cared who branded him as a witch, and dispatched his immediate pursuers in a furious display of Geomancy. From then on, the world under the ground was the only place he was safe as he continued Northward. It felt liberating to be able to use his power without fear, and he did not hesitate to use it whenever he could.

It wasn’t long after that representatives of Vale Institute of Magic found him, starving and almost suffocating in a hole in the ground. He was promised a new life at the school, and he eagerly accepted. The institute’s influence allowed them to grant him a visa to study in the United States, and a chopper was sent to retrieve him. His long-time dream of living in the United States was finally coming true, the circumstances of which no longer mattered to him.

Code: Challenge me, vato.

Other: Despite his fluency in the English language, he still speaks with a thick hispanic accent. He will also occasionally forget a word he wants and instead say the Spanish word for it, regardless of how well the listening party understands.
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  #690    
Old April 15th, 2014 (12:17 PM).
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Colony Colony is offline
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Okay, so, I'm gonna keep this short and sweet since I'm working on a paper at the moment. Geras, you're accepted. I'll add you to the OOc and IC initial posts later on tonight when I'm not so busy.
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More to come, but they're in the works. Also, if you like what you see and want one just ask. It's not like I've got anything better to do (other than write posts).
  #691    
Old April 15th, 2014 (03:10 PM).
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Cosmic Fury Cosmic Fury is offline
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Alright, I finally got my app more or less complete. Is there anything else I need to improve on for it???
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The Tale of a Wanderer -- Reboot coming in the future

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  #692    
Old April 17th, 2014 (09:05 PM). Edited April 18th, 2014 by Songbird.
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Alrighty, Cosmic, Tiberius is officially accepted! :D
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  #693    
Old April 19th, 2014 (10:23 AM).
Lacangel Lacangel is offline
 
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Name: Kofi Jackson

Nickname: N/A

Age: 17

Gender: Male

Element: Earth / Water


Spells:

Aqua Sphere: Kofi uses Aqua Sphere as both an offensive and defensive spell. Kofi creates a sphere completely made of water trapping anything inside it. Kofi can focus all of his energy in sustaining the sphere or use it in a quick burst trapping his opponent in it for a couple seconds. Kofi can also control the rapids inside the sphere either letting the water be still or creating a swirling vortex spinning the opponent around inside causing them to suffocate at a faster rate and become dizzy with trouble regaining their balance once released from the sphere. While channeling Aqua Sphere Kofi is unable to cast any other spells.

Surfs Up!: Kofi creates a tidal wave of varying sizes depending on how much energy he uses. The tidal wave is able travel short distances (longer if Kofi pours more energy into his attack). This is Kofi’s most well rounded move as he uses it for mobility/defense/offense. For mobility he creates his tidal wave under his feet and surfs the wave allowing him to get high in the air and dash in various directions. Offensively he uses the wave to come crashing down on an opponent. Defensively Kofi uses the tidal wave as a wall to block attacks. Since this wall is made of water if the attack is hard and fast enough it will pass through the wave. Also heavier objects usually get through the wall with relative ease.

Gia Spire: Kofi slams his fist or his foot into the ground causing a spire of varying sizes to shoot out from the earth in any which direction Kofi chooses. Kofi is a strategist and uses this move to set up a lot of his combos, using the spire in various different ways.


Personality: Peace, love and tranquility are the three main virtues that Kofi stands for. In Kofi’s world everybody is beautiful in their own way and everyone is a friend; he wishes to inspire the world to move towards that type of thinking. After many years of traveling the country seeing all of the beauty the world has to offer he’s grown into the “go with the flow” mentality and likes to preserve whatever peace there may be. Beautiful weather, beautiful sights, creatures and beautiful flowers always seem to surround him wherever he goes; probably sensing the earth magic as well as his peaceful nature.
Despite Kofi’s peaceful nature he may be just one of the smartest kids around. Ever since the 4th grade every teacher Kofi has ever had repeats the same thing “Kofi is one of the brightest kid’s I have ever taught, but he doesn’t do the work. Ask him a question and he’ll know the answer right away but give him a homework sheet and you’ll never see it again.” This is no different at The Vale Institution of Magic. When it’s time for class and Kofi isn’t there, there is no question where he will be; He’s probably hanging out under a big tree somewhere watching the clouds and relaxing.


Kofi is very easy to get along with and very hard to anger. If there was one thing about Kofi’s personality that didn’t seem to fit the rest it’s his competitive nature. Kofi loves to compete and hates to lose, though he will lose gracefully and admit when he is defeated. The first thing Kofi will say to a stranger he meets, “Wanna go chill bro?”

History: Kofi grew up a pretty sheltered life. He was fortunate to be born into a household where money was never a problem. Other than that his family was just another ordinary family but with a knack for having great athletic ability throughout their whole family. His mother and father both graduated from Harvard. His mom continued on to do environmental work throughout many “less-privileged” communities while his dad was a businessman. His dad was a success story growing up poor and becoming very successful so even though they had a lot of money he instilled good values in Kofi about money and tried not to spoil him. Kofi’s carefree attitude helped play a role because he never really cared about material items of money, if he had some he had some and if he didn’t he didn’t it wasn’t a big deal.


Kofi’s parents always knew that their soon was a very peace loving and somewhat lazy boy. They tried to motivate him by giving rewards for good school work and also by taking away things for poor school work but nothing really seemed to effect Kofi his grades would never really improve higher than the C+ - B- range but everyone knew he was capable of getting straight A’s; as he proved so in 7th grade scoring a 29 on the ACT and registering an over 160 IQ. Despite this Kofi’s parents have always been very supportive about anything he was wanted to do so when one day Kofi packed a backpack and told his parents he would be heading out to find his way in life they understood and accepted his decision as well as gave him a cell phone and debit case he got into any serious trouble.


Kofi set out on foot to explore the world and see its beauty for himself. He traveled and hitchhiked his way all the way up to Oregon where he spent the rest of his time. Oregon to him was the beauty of the world he felt such peace and tranquility there. One day he was sitting on a river bank with his feet in the water and stuck his finger in and started swirling the water around to make a little mini funnel to amuse himself. When he took his finger out the swirling didn’t stop it kept going and going. Kofi sat there for at least half an hour staring at this swirl he made. Soon his eyes where moving in circles following the swirl and then all of a sudden the swirl started moving in circles surprising Kofi. To Kofi this shocked him but not for long he decided to experiment and discovered that he could manipulate water. Soon after he went back to his resting spot underneath a nearby tree and sat down and put on his headphones to just listen to music and soak in what he had just discovered. Listening to his favorite band “Nirvana” he started tapping to the beat and noticed when he was tapping his feet against the ground the ground would raise and create bumps; not shocking him after his incident with water he found he was a magic user of both Earth and Water

Code: “What’s good bro wanna show me what you got?” (aka Challenge me)

Other: Kofi was able to capture the 1st swirl of water he ever made in a little see through vial which he keeps with him in his back pocket for good luck, as well as having a necklace made of string with a wooden peace sign worn around his neck
  #694    
Old April 24th, 2014 (06:15 AM).
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Impossiperiod Impossiperiod is offline
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Hey everyone,

Sorry for being absent but a lot has come up in real life causing me to be away from my computer for uncomfortable amounts of time. (I'm going through withdrawals!) But with the end of my school year coming up and finals and graduation just around the corner, I've been using the time lately to focus on myself, my grades, and my future college plans.

I hope comes a time that I will be able to devote more time to this roleplay that I have grown to love but my attendance will be fleeting. I am unsure if I should pull out completely or just for the moment until this time in my life has passed.
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  #695    
Old April 24th, 2014 (07:13 PM).
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Songbird Songbird is offline
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Give it a little more time, I say. Think about it while you're sleeping through lectures, and if you can't throw the couple hours a week into typing for your RPs, feel free to tell us.

Regardless of your choice, we'll make sure there's still a spot open for you so you can jump right back in. :3
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  #696    
Old April 26th, 2014 (09:34 PM).
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Cosmic Fury Cosmic Fury is offline
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To be quite honest, I'm not sure how to introduce my character. Is he coming in a day late? Will there be others to tell him where he should be?

I'd very much like advice, because my writer's block is standing before me like a wall.
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The Tale of a Wanderer -- Reboot coming in the future

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  #697    
Old April 27th, 2014 (12:59 PM).
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Songbird Songbird is offline
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There's no reason he needs to be a day late, and most of the time it's just a shoehorned excuse. How about you give him an NPC friend in class who was impressed with his exam, and they talk a bit during the magic demonstrations? Maybe add a bit of a flashback to what happened to give us an idea of how he fights. :3
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  #698    
Old April 27th, 2014 (02:10 PM).
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Cosmic Fury Cosmic Fury is offline
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Sounds like a good idea.

Is the same class still going on, or is it already almost over?
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The Tale of a Wanderer -- Reboot coming in the future

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  #699    
Old April 27th, 2014 (03:28 PM).
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The same class (fire-based dual element demonstrations) is still going on, because Colony and I have been lazy about moving along. We've been procrastinating with the joint post challenge.

We're going to move into the mechanics of fire magic as soon as we stop being butts, and you'll have some freedom to move around and be creative.
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  #700    
Old May 3rd, 2014 (09:23 PM).
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Colony Colony is offline
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Okay, so after some long, hard deliberation on whether or not Vale could continue with the storyline that had been originally created for it, Birdy and I decided that it would be in the roleplay’s best interest for it to be redesigned. What this includes is a complete overhauling of the story, possibly including a brand new setting, better class set ups, and a restructured list of elements, along with a plethora of other new or changed features. I’ve already asked for Magic to lock the OOC and IC, so I apologize for how sudden this may seem.

One nice little addition that has already been decided is that Light and Darkness will be available for characters*. Birdy and I would like to thank everyone that has been with us so far and hope that everyone returns when we finish the reworking. If anybody would like to ask either of us a question about Vale or would like to know how the redesign’s progress is coming along, you can VM or PM us.


*Based on extremely complicated and convoluted criteria that Birdy has yet to make up.
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