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1,000 Ways to get Kicked Out of Walmart [v.2]

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
879.
Walk in with a butcher knife, and then grab a random customer. HOld the knife to their throat and walk into the restrooms. Then, pour a bunch of fake blood make-up outside the door, knock the customer out, smear them with the make-up, and leave them face-down in the red puddle. Wait inside the restroom to be kicked out.

880.
Walk in, steal some gum very subtly, then walk out. Repeat, wearing different clothes(all in the same day) until all the gum in the store is gone. Then make gum sculptures and place them randomly inside the store
 

Jiggly Jello

DJ Squiggles
45
Posts
11
Years
882

This works better if you are male...Stroll in to the Lawn & Garden section and proceed to urinate on as many plants as you can until someone notices you. When they do, scream "CAN'T YOU SEE I'M WATERING THE PLANTS SO THEY'LL GROW INTO PRETTY RABBITS?" Then spin around in a circle and stop to face the employee and ask him "did you pee in these plants sir? then hit him over the head with a plant pot so he will chase you. Make sure he follows you. Then skip (not run, skip) to the Tire Lube Express section and then stand in front of a car doing the "bladder dance." Wait for the Garden employee to get within earshot and then start yelling at the people there "hurry up and finish fixing my getaway car cuz I gotta PEEEEEEE!" Wait to be removed/arrested
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
883

This works better if you commit plagiarism.

Get over to the restaurant section in Critic's clothes, and say "We are ready for in...in...insper...insper...inspection...". The employee will sweat and say "What, wha...? What are you doing here?". Then order a Hamburger, and say "You stole my Secret Formula... I'm going to close this mart and call the police!". The employee will say "But we haven't stole anything! You cannot close US down!". Retaliate, and pick up a phone saying "COPS, WE NEED YOU!". When the cops arrive, get the secret formula under everyone's noses. Say "They stole this formula" to the cops, and they will arrest the Manager for Stealing. However, when they point out that you have the Secret Formula, they will arrest you too for Plagiarism.
 

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
886.
(HOLY CRUD! I want 888!)
Go to the videogame section of the store and buy a game. After you buy it, demand that they take it back because you hate it and you want your money back. Warranty. Once they take it back, buy it again. Repeat.

887.
(ONE MOAR!!!)
Go to the cellphone section with a techie bomb, and use it, rendering all the cell phones worthless(as the bomb emitted a wave that destroyed the chips working them.)

888.
(THIS IS IT! THIS IS THE BIG ONE! 111 MOAR UNTIL ANOTHER SPECIAL OCCASSION LIKE THIS HAPPENS!)
Throw a huge party in the store, with everything wearing the number 8 on their shirts, and end up wrecking the store. Be as destructive as you can.
 

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
890.
Perform #55 and #63 simultaneously while juggling a seal screaming out:
"PUPPIES!"

Then, throw the seal at an employee and perform #78 and #576.
(I have no idea what 55, 63, 78, or 576 are. I don't wanna search this thread for 'em though xD)
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
891

WARNING: This number may contain unsuitable language not for kids.

Walk around the store and say "I want that F*cking item!". Then say "Lookie here, some extra information. OH SH*T I DON'T WANT THIS ITEM!!!". Then walk to a employee and, if the employee says "So you want that item?", then shout "Objection" in Edgeworth's voice. Then say "I need the toilet because I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS!". Flood the toilets, and walk to the manager saying "I hate you, I hate Employee, I hate toilets, I HATE EVERYTHING!". Then,wait to be kicked out.
 

TornZero

Resident Yuri-ism Cult Leader
1,137
Posts
14
Years

Method #892 for Getting Kicked Out of Wal-Mart


Team shopping cart race across the entire store, starting at the door and ending in produce. Various methods to stop your opponents are accepted and encouraged, including but not limited to: knocking down items off the shelves; banana peels; and pushing people in your foes' way.

First one to fly out of the cart after three laps and land in the produce without damaging anything wins. If everyone damages some of the produce, it's a tie and you have to do it again!
 

Nineray

Green Okido
169
Posts
12
Years
893. Ride the bike through the store while holding tennis ball throwing them at people saying I choose you Pikachu, then procede to jump off while its still going right into a shelf then run around the store for a victory lap on another bike doing the same thing.
 

Nineray

Green Okido
169
Posts
12
Years
898 roll out all the carpets run then jump on them so they slide away
899 Joust with carpets and carts
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
900

Shout "OMG WHAT DA HECK ARE YOU DOING?!" At the Manager. Then, pull your trousers down (I'm serious, I'm SERIOUSLY SERIOUS) and then poop on the manager's head (I'm serious, I'm SERIOUSLY SERIOUS). Do #539, #382, #219, #687, #798, #1, #100 and #151 all at once. Continue until you need the toilet. Give the manager a wedgie (Putting a rock in his sock, and some ants in his pants) and yell "I need the toilet, BECAUSE YOU... NEED IT!". Walk around the store three times and yell "Where's the toilet? Where's the butter? Where's the T.V? WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYTHING?!". Wait until the manager comes, and throw blue cheese in his face. Skip (Not run, NOT RUN) to the Restroom and wait. Wait. Wait. Wait more. When the manager comes, say "I couldn't find the toilet, so I wet myself here, as well as pooping on you.". Wait to be removed.
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
902

Play "Through The Fire And Flames" on Guitar Hero Expert. Except, get loads of notes wrong HOWEVER COMPLETE THE SONG WITHOUT FAILING.
 

diab_low

All men live, only few exist.
644
Posts
11
Years
903

Slap the asses of all female staff if your male

Slap the asses of all male staff if your female
 
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