Now that I got done with judging SWC, will be playing catch up!
Chapters One and Two
This is the second time a character is named after me, haha. Also noticed Sike Saner and Nolafus getting shout outs too. :P
At first I was confused as to why Alex and Sike not recognize the tv as they're reporters, but then I realize they're probably using radio. And Arkus there sure made an appearance, especially with him making Alex and Sikes have temporary amnesia. Geez, haha.
Alicia seems to like to mumble/think aloud a lot, which can be a problem if you work in the library. :P
The grovyle stopped and turned his head towards her. Then he kept walking without giving a reply.
"Huh. Does he not know how to speak? He can read, but he could still be mute. Or he could be rude. Probably the latter."
Alicia dusted off the tables, starting with the grovyle's table. After she cleaned all the tables, she took the rag and shook it outside. A brilliant blue strand, glittering in the sunlight, caught her attention as it drifted towards the ground. She plucked it out of the air and held it to her eyes.
Hm....something's not right here (though that's obvious, haha).
Chapters Three and Four
More brawling in your works, huh? :p Very curious as to why Arkus wants Eck and what his role in the story will be.
Once Siru was done, Eck took a closer look at his new master's face. It seemed as though he was wearing a blue, transparent mask shaped like a grovyle, with a more canine face underneath. Eck strained his eyes and saw that the grovyle face was the fake.
My suspicions deepened upon that part.
Dussell returned to the reports in his office. Although he tried concentrating on the other cases, he couldn't stop analyzing the Jennings murder and the incalculable precision that went into the shot. He was debating sending a second unit for more calculations when his wife walked into his office. Though she ducked underneath the doorframe, the fires flickering out of the back of her neck singed the wood.
"Come on, Dussell, let's have lunch. You're not saying no this time."
For some reason I now like the idea of a zoroark and typhlosion together haha.
Dussell returned to the reports in his office. Although he tried concentrating on the other cases, he couldn't stop analyzing the Jennings murder and the incalculable precision that went into the shot. He was debating sending a second unit for more calculations when his wife walked into his office. Though she ducked underneath the doorframe, the fires flickering out of the back of her neck singed the wood.
"Come on, Dussell, let's have lunch. You're not saying no this time."
O.o Oh dear.
"Desserts, compliments of the house!" a voice called from the other side. The door opened, and a nuzleaf set a tray of coffee cake onto the table. Heste stood up, grabbed the nuzleaf by the neck, and pinned him against the wall of their booth.
"You overheard us, didn't you! Answer me!"
"I – I din't, I swear!"
The fires from Heste's back roared high enough to singe the ceiling. "Liar! You were waiting outside that door, waiting for the conversation to end before bringing in the dessert, weren't you?"
"Heste, enough. He wasn't listening." Dussell could feel a heat wave pouring out of Heste's fur, and the nuzleaf was starting to wilt in the heat. "Just calm down and let him go."
And shortly right after, a pretty intense scene there.
Chapter Five and Six
"She's a woman, just like any other, and she clearly doesn't know how to have fun. It's my duty as a gentleman to teach her."
Blake roared with laughter and said, "You? A gentleman? Whatever, dude, go over there. I'll be sure to have them carve something properly ironic in your headstone."
Man, I hate guys like those. :/ Thank goodness Alicia didn't go with him at the end
"Good to see you again, boys. How was the weather today?"
"Blue skies, Millie," Eck answered, and Tas added, "Gorgeous, with clouds as white as fresh-fallen snow. But not nearly as gorgeous as you are."
Cant' help but think the "blue skies" is a reference to your SWC entry, heh. While the brothel having an underground isn't new, it's still neat in this story's context.
"Then that is what I want you to focus upon. There are few ways of acquiring money without anyone hearing about it, none of which bode well for us. First, learn what you can, and once we're better informed, we shall decide how to deal with your new master. As for you, Tas, Mistress Lorende is pleased with your hard work. We have much to prepare before the return of Keith the Savior, and that time is fast approaching."
So both Eck and Tas work for Lorende? Some interesting revelations there.
Chapter Seven and Eight
I like that Chapter Seven has some police action going on near the end!
"Psyduck off, you elitist prick." The vigoroth spat at Dussell's feet and said, "You zoroark get it easy, being the children of god and all. What bullmuk. Do you actually have to work for your bread? Have you ever even felt hungry? We do what we have to just to stay alive."
Oh ouch.
The man paused, and he answered, "Alex. Alex Bayson."
"Thank you Alex."
Once Dussell left for his car, the roserade's appearance shifted into that of a grovyle. The grovyle smiled and said, "That went better than I hoped."
Wait, what? D:
"The war itself is missing from history, from the fighting itself, to the start of it, to the degradation of human-pokemon relations that caused the war in the first place. Furthermore, for humans and pokemon to have been capable of such a great war, they needed to have some form of political and military system, both of which would require tens, if not hundreds of years to develop. Do you see why I'm not content with the history books as they are?"
"I see what you mean. The reason we have no records from before that time is because the war destroyed everything. There isn't a trace left from before the Era of the Father."
Not surprising the records would be destroyed. At least we know now why Arkus's been in the library.
I think it's interesting you have the chapters format similar to A Song of Ice and Fire series this time around. Looking forward to more!
