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1,000 Ways to get Kicked Out of Walmart [v.2]

Zayphora

Don't mess with the lights...
493
Posts
11
Years
956

Now that DarkPokeball is dead, run as fast as you can. Walk up to a guy who looks like Red the most and randomly throw a tennis ball at him saying "Battle initiated!". Say "Ally Celebi used Perish Song!". Then, say "Enemy Pikachu used Destiny Bond!". Then, after 3 seconds, say "Celebi fainted! Pikachu fainted!". Then, walk away (First put white paint on you everywhere) from the guy to DarkPokeball. Then, throw a tennis ball at him. When the guards take him away, watch as he is put into the sea. Walk back in the store without walking (You need to use your knees to move), and once you bump into an isle, pretend you lost your arms (Hide them). Talk to the manager and say "I am hiding.". Wait to be kicked out.

Lost Silver...I see wat u did there!

957

Get a bag full of bacon, and go up to the manager, screaming that Kcalb killed your Tepig because he wanted bacon.
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
Lost Silver...I see wat u did there!

957

Get a bag full of bacon, and go up to the manager, screaming that Kcalb killed your Tepig because he wanted bacon.

I know... I know it's Lost Silver. I put it in the post by edited it out very quickly.

Anyways, who is Kcalb?

958

Go to the Pokemon Isle, and scream "Gotta catch 'em all!". Get ALL of the Pokemon Games there. Later realise you accidentally picked up a Lost Silver cartridge. Scream in agony like you've just lost your body.

959

Buy ALL of the drinks! Throw ALL of them at the manager!

960

Buy ALL of the shirts! Try to eat one while you're driving the trolley.
 

Zayphora

Don't mess with the lights...
493
Posts
11
Years
961
Build a giant sculpture out of mops and pink duct tape. Hopefully of "X ALL THE Y" because that would be funny.

@Umbr30n- NO ONE EVER KNOWS IM GETTING TIRED OF EXPLAINING THIS LOOK IT UP!!! *rage*
 

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
963.
Bring Darkpokeball back to life, bring him into the store and tell him to get you kicked out. You should be kicked out within ten seconds.

964.
Watch in amusement as Umbr30n bursts into the store to return Darkpokeball to the grave and watch as Umbr30n gets kicked out because the manager remembers him.

965.
Sneak into the manager's house. Wake him up in the middle of the night and whisper into his face:
"I'm going to be at Wal-Mart tomorrow. Kick me out if you want to live."
Then, chlorofoam the manager and leave. Show up at Wal-mart the next day.
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
964.
Watch in amusement as Umbr30n bursts into the store to return Darkpokeball to the grave and watch as Umbr30n gets kicked out because the manager remembers him.

Not gonna work man! I'm English!

Besides, I don't get kicked out.

967

Wait 6 years for DarkPokeball to rot away and die. Plant grass over the grave so that he will be forgotten. Ask to get kicked out.

@Zayphora: For cr*p's sake it's just a tale. I don't NEED to look it up.
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
@RodriguezJames55: So you caught the Julian Assange Virus. Isn't that why you hacked Pokemon Games? To get viruses?

970

Ask a friend to pretend to be a fake interviewer. Make it ask you several nonsense questions. He/She will ask "Are you a Boy or a Girl?", Then you must tell him "Boy". Then, he will ask "You're so b*tchy that...", where you have either three options. You could say either "I jump on my bed at night screaming MARIA!", or say "I was stupid. I actually thought Mohammad Ali was actually a Rugby player!", or say "GET THE F*CK OUT THE STORE AND GET LAID.". Then, he/she should ask "Do you believe in god?". Say either "Not right now honey, I'm currently pooping in the toilet.", or say "MAEK NIN10DOH TT64POWER NOW, YOU CRAZY SH*T! I DON'T CARE ABOUT RELIGION.", or say "I believe for a Tyrannosaur Rex with sunshades, a bow-tie and a tambourine!". Your friend should then ask you "Elevator?". Then you must say either "Erm...", or say "Ugh...", or say "Gererm...". The manager will kick you out if you say "MAEK NIN10DOH TT64POWER NOW, YOU CRAZY SH*T! I DON'T CARE ABOUT RELIGION.", "Not right now honey, I'm currently pooping in the toilet.", "I jump on my bed at night screaming MARIA!", "I believe for a Tyrannosaur Rex with sunshades, a bow-tie and a tambourine!" Or "GET THE F*CK OUT THE STORE AND GET LAID.". If you hadn't been kicked out, shout all your answers out again until the Manager does so.
 

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
971.
Be the fake interviewer from step 970. Once Umbr30n gets kicked out, knock him out. Bring him back into Wal-Mart, (make sure you have a sharp knife and fork) and eat him in public. If he wakes up, just slit his throat so he won't wake up again.

972.
Walk into Wal-Mart and rendevous with your secret source of intel...a Meowth. It should lend you a chainsaw. Slice as many customers as you can, return the chainsaw and claim your reward from the manager.

973.
Cosplay as Bulbasaur, make your friend cosplay as Pikachu. Reenact "PokeAwesome"...(just have your friend make a huge commotion about being hurt in the knee)
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
971.
Be the fake interviewer from step 970. Once DarkPokeball gets kicked out, knock him out. Bring him back into Wal-Mart, (make sure you have a sharp knife and fork) and eat him in public. If he wakes up, just slit his throat so he won't wake up again.

I edited the post so actually it is you who gets eaten. So, actually, I never got eaten, but you did.

974

Realise that Umbr30n hasn't been kicked out, and it was his friend Red99 dressing up as him and that you knocked him out. Umbr30n starts calling the police, and DarkPokeball is sent to Prison for eternity. Umbr30n puts Red99 in Hospital.
 

Zayphora

Don't mess with the lights...
493
Posts
11
Years
975

Get a bunch of random people to stand in the same spot all day, staring in the same direction, and when someone comes by, say some inane thing. Repeat every time you and everyone else see someone. See how long it takes to scare the crap out of everyone with your NPC-ness.

976
Take a fishing rod, a small turquoise pom-pom, and some small plastic wings. Put the wings on the pompom and attach the whole thing to the end of the line, making sure the line is that clear fishing line, not too visible. Then stake out on top of an aisle, and when you see someone you think might be a Zelda fan, dangle the pompom near their ear and scream "LISTEN, LISTEN!!!"
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
979

Walk into the store. Move all the items somewhere else (EVERYTHING MUST BE MOVED). Then, the customers will get mixed up, and the employees will get mixed up. Wait to be kicked out.
 

Zayphora

Don't mess with the lights...
493
Posts
11
Years
980
Dress up as $!3V3N from Strangled Red and strangle everyone.

981
Take all the square objects and make towers out of them. Make MissingNo shaped ones for extra awesome points. Then, knock said towers down with a baseball bat.
 

darkpokeball

Beware the Chainsaw Meowth 0.o
762
Posts
14
Years
982.
Help Darkpokeball escape from prison, switch clothes, and walk into Wal-Mart. Turn yourself in, claiming you're Darkpokeball so the authorities get sidetracked. The police should kick you out.

983.
Steal everybody's cell phones. Hide them in various places around the store, then on the intercom say:
"Your mission is to find your cell phone. You have 30 minutes. Fail and face erasure."

984.
Buy laundry baskets. The next day, come back and complain that the laundry baskets weren't fit for going downstairs at high speeds. Rant about this to drive away customers.

985.
Cut the manager off and become somebody that he/she used to know. Enter the store and tick the manager off even more.

986.
Walk in, in your underwear and demand that everyone else strip to their underwear as well so it will be easier to give a speech.
 

Affliction

Booted out - don't be like me!
524
Posts
11
Years
  • Age 46
  • Seen Sep 3, 2016
987

(Recommended) Turn the real DarkPokeball into prison. Before you get him in, a hilarious-looking Umbr30n (Funny Face, nothing else, not that special) will kick him in the inescapable cellar.

988

Be the fake interviewer from 970. Once DarkPokeball gets kicked out, knock him out. Bring him back in the Mart (Make sure you have a sharp knife and fork) and eat him in public. If he wakes up, just slit his throat so he won't wake up again. Call Umbr30n, and Umbr30n will shout "THAT'S FOR THREATENING ME, *****. You ended up eaten after all! I NEVER got eaten! Now that you are dead, everyone could have a great life! Now **** off, before you are put to sleep!". Mission succeeded, and now the argument has been officially finished.

989

Say "How did I get here?" In French, and then backwards.

990

Toidi na eb. Read that forwards, it will say "Be an Idiot".

991

It will work better if Umbr30n is actually there. Paint on the walls "UMBR30N SEZ." If Umbr30n is indeed there, he will edit it to "Says.".

992

Organize a fake cart race and try to lose. Knock down everything in the store.

993

Try to organize a fake trolley dash. Knock down everything in the store.

994

Throw open bags of sugar at the customers, when they should say "When are you going to run out of Sugar man?!". Then you must reply "I won't. I work in a Sugar Factory.".

995

Say "I'm going to do an internet!", Pressing a key on a keyboard. Keep on spamming presses until the Key Brakes.

996

Dress up as a Mine Turtle, and crawl around the ground. Say "Hello" and throw an open bag of flour to substitute an explosion.

997

Go to the nearest person with salad (Starting to punch it), and shout "I AM PUNCHING YOUR SALAD!!"

998

Shout "Why is the baby on fire?!", Overreacting over nothing actually happening, and start throwing cheese at the manager.

999

Call 999 when the Manager tries to threaten you.

1000

Dress up as the I Like Trains Kid and say "I Like Trains.". Then, one of your friends must push a toy train at somebody, trying to knock them over. Say "We have now reached 1000, we had our highs and lows." Do every other number of ways except 971. "We have had good times, and bad times." You must say next. The Manager starts crying tears of joy. "But, this is the final way, and I feel ****** about it." You must say last. Then ask to hold a party outside the Mart, and the Manager feels so happy about being invited that he joyfully kicks people out to the party, and lets all who were previously banned back in again.
 

ShinyUmbreon189

VLONE coming soon
1,461
Posts
12
Years
I'm not sure of what the rules are but I guess Ill restart.

1. Go get a cart full of flour. Then go up to people randomly and throw it in their face.
2. Get a bicicle and ride all over the store with an airhorn.
3. Walk into the store with a mouth full of sprite mixed with Fanta and make sure you fit as much as possible and in the middle of the store act like your throwing up and walk away.
4. Dress in a old miltary costume with the fake cevlar (helmet) and all and go get the fake guns and make sure you bring fake grenades as well with about 10+ people. Once you get everything act like your in a war. Throw a grenade and yell "Fire in the hole". When shooting the M16 make 3 round burst sounds, and yell "reloading."
 
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