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[Pokémon] PMD: Explorers of Caltesla

Etherion

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Author's Notes
Hello FFW! And welcome to my first ever fanfic! Its about a Pokemon who is determined to make a name for himself! Join Locke the pink Espurr in
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Caltesla
Comments and critiques, both good and bad, are highly appreciated because they help me learn and give me motivation to write! So feel free to leave one!
I hope you enjoy. -gio7sm


Table of Contents
Chapter One (here)
The Forgotten Prologue
Updated: April 12 (one year XD sorry)


Chapter 1
The kingdom of Caltesla was once a formidable city-fortress until the Great War struck the kingdom, which resulted in the loss of many lives, especially a king. Many years have passed since the grim event and the kingdom has risen from the ashes of war. It was rebuilt on a high hill supplied by a series of lush waterways. A new king was appointed to the throne, and his first order of business was the formation of an organization with two purposes - capture outlaws and protect the needy. Thus, the Caltesla Explorers Guild was born! A building where any Pokemon can join and take missions by the king and other Pokemon, one can join others to form a team and search the whole continent for outlaws which are rumored to be hiding in mysterious dungeons.

Caldisla.jpg


Our story begins in the large and long dirt road that leads to the kingdom, where a lone Espurr is walking on foot towards Caltesla. He was looking forward to join the guild and become the best explorer he could possibly be. He wore a black hodded jacket to protect him from the cold, he took it of when he could see the sun was up, and warmth was starting to spread. He peered upwards, eyeing his destination - the Caltesla Explorers Guild. He was not like the other Espurr, introverted and loners, he was something - unique. He is carefree and calm and he constantly tries to motivate other people, and has a pure spirit, however, he is known to be gullible and rushes into things more often than he should. He tries to help others in their times of need, but gets into other people's lives a bit too, frequently. Despite all of this, the Espurr is the kind of guy to live it large and make friends on the way. He looks towards the future and is an adventurer by heart. He rested in a rock nearby that overlooked Caltesta's famous waterways.

He wasn't ordinary appearance-wise as well, his fur is mussed and a pale pink color, not the manliest of colors which often made people mistake him for a girl, but he didn't mind them. A silent breeze went pass him, and he continued walking ahead. Just as he passed by a wooden sign with the words, "Kingdom of Caltesla" written on it, he remembered his own family. He was the last born of a Meowstic and Glaceon, he had three Eevee and an Espurr as siblings. He had lived a life in the shadows of his siblings, the three Eevee had evolved into a Flareon, Jolteon and Vaporeon and became explorers themselves at a young age and became top notched members of the guild, meanwhile his Espurr sibling owns a cafe in another kingdom, which had already received recognition from the king for serving the best coffee in the land!

He wanted to make a name for himself and he thought that by joining the guild he can achieve his dream. After awhile of walking, the walled kingdom was insight, it looked so much better than those pictures his brothers had sent him. The dirt path became cobblestone streets as he entered the kingdom grounds. Two Escaviler gaurded the arched entrace, the Espurr gazed at them while passing, but they didn't seem to care. He continued his trip upwards to the guild, passing a variety of buildings along the way.

One was a long and had two levels, it was labeled as "Gastrodon Goods!" and had many people entering and exiting it. A sign outside says "We sell almost everything!" The pink Espurr wore his jacket again and disappeared in the crowd. The next building he passed was old and had black stone walls, it was a Blacksmith and Appraisal Shop ran by a lone Heatmor bashing a piece of molten iron. Around the corner, a shiny building caught his eyes, lights danced around and inside of it, it was the "Volbeat and Illumise Bank and Storage," where civilians store thier money and valued treasures.

He arrived ay the base of a flight of wodden stairs that lead to the guild and eagerly climbed it as fast as he could. Many Pokemon were climbing the stairs also, they wore a badge-like object depicting a sword, some had bronze and some had silver colors. He was very curious to ask if what were those badges all about, but he hesitated and decided not to. Three more steps and he would arrive.

One, two, three!

He leaped up the final step only to be stopped by a light blue Pokemon, "Hold up! What is your business here?" Sneered the Pokemon. The Espurr looked at the Ice - type and nervously said, "I'm here to join the guild!" The Amaura calmed herself, "Well then, I will be your tour guide, come this way, and quickly!" She turned around and entered the guild, and the Espurr shortly followed.

The guild had architecture like no other in the kingdom, it had red domed towers, an open porch at the front held up with most ostentatiously detailed pillars, painted in brilliant white. There were no doors on the entrace, only arches and the flagstone floor was made with a stone of soft grey hues. The walls were a white stone that glistened in the summer sun. Two red tapestries depicting an Aegislash were hanged on each side of the arched entrance, one in shield form and one in sword form.

The shiny Espurr followed his tourguide inside the first floor of the guild. It was an expansive spherical shape, the flagstone floors and the white stone walls design continued. The Amaura stopped infront a wooden desk manned by a Furfrou with scarlet dyed fur. "This is registrar Furfrou, come here later once you completed the tour," the Amaura said. The Poodle Pokemon looked the Espurr in the eyes and said, "Good morning missy," she said in an old, raspy voice. "Actually I'm a -" the Espurr tried to speak up but the Tundra Pokemon interrupted. "Dont dawdle! I dont have all day!"

The tour continued and their next stop was the Mission Board. It was a big wooden board with various parchments pinned to it. "This is the Mission Board, where you can take on missions. As you can see, the missions are bordered with different colors, these represent the ranks. Ranks reflect the skill level of the guild members, and they also determine which mission you can and cannot go." Then Amaura explained.

Two pedestals are positioned on the sides of the board, they headed over to the left one, which held a map. "Missions takes place on areas called 'dungeons', this map has all the dungeons currently discovered." She pointed towards the map of the continent. "Red means kingdoms or towns, yellow means dungeons," the Amaura referred to the dots scattered across the map. They headed over to the right pedestal where a list was displayed. "This is the member list," the list contained pictures of the guild members on the left, and a colored box in the right. "Those boxes represent the ranks that members are in, like this one." The Amaura pointed at a Sewaddle with a brown box. "That means that the Sewaddle is in the Bronze Rank." She explained.

"What other ranks are there?" The Espurr asked. "From least to greatest, Bronze, Silver, Platinum, Gold, Diamond and Crystal." The Amaura responded. "Now, come here," they went towards the left side of the entrance, where a lone Shuckle sat idle. "This is a member of the Shuckle Patrol, come to him if you catch an outlaw." The Mold Pokemon threw them a silet salute. "Now go over to the registrar," the Amaura ordered the Espurr and he followed.

Once at the desk, the Furfrou with scarlet-dyed fur greeted him with a smile. "I see that you completed your tour missy," the Espurr interrupted her and said. "I'm a guy." The pink Espurr gave the Poddle Pokemon an agitated look. "I'm terribly sorry, please forgive these old eyes." She pleaded. "Its ok," he gently said. "Now! To get you registered!" The Furfrou grabbed a camera, a pen and some paper. "Name, species and gender please,"

"My name is Locke, I'm a male Espurr."

She wrote down the Espurr's details and picked up the camera. "Smile," a flash hit the Psychic type's eyes. "Good! Now, your an official member of the guild! Please accept these equipment." She handed Locke a bag, a bronze sword badge, and a map. "Use the bag to store items, and the badge shows your rank and the guild you belong - in this case, the sword is the insignia of Caltesla and finally, the town map, its a map of the kingdom, so you dont get lost."

"Thank you," Locke said.

"Congratulations! Your now a member of the Caltesla Explorers Guild!"
In which an odd Espurr arrives
 
Last edited:
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12
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  • Age 29
  • Seen May 11, 2023
Thread layout is super super pretty, makes the story seem so much more inviting! I feel like the intro was a little rushed and could use padding out a little - will details of the war be shared later and what was the aftermath of the war that lead to them needing to establish this guild? The art of Caltesla is incredibly beautiful, did you make that yourself? :o I feel like you might over-use punctuation a tad, especially in the 2nd paragraph - if you read it to yourself there's a lot of pauses per sentence and it feels a bit strange to listen to. I really like the character background of Locke so far (and Locke is an exceptionally cool name choice), he's seeming like a really likeable and appealing character with a lot of room for growth and development - hearing more about his past in future chapters would be really cool! I also loved how you described Caltesla whilst Locke was walking to the guild, really set the mood of the town and painted a great impression of how the town appeared to the characters. The story itself seems really well-written and very interesting with a lot of cool characters, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where it goes next and how he gets on in the first few days of guildhood.

One other small thing I noticed - you start off in present tense with "where a lone Espurr is walking on foot towards Caltesla" but then swap to past tense for the rest of the story. Is this intentional? I don't know enough about writing styles to comment but it seemed a little odd to me haha.

There's a few minor spelling/grammar errors (eg "one was a long") so proof-reading again could help but overall I think it's a great story so far and I'm really looking forward to chapter two!

PS: I never really check FF&W but if you post a new chapter please message me or something so I can read it :D
 

Etherion

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Thread layout is super super pretty, makes the story seem so much more inviting! I feel like the intro was a little rushed and could use padding out a little - will details of the war be shared later and what was the aftermath of the war that lead to them needing to establish this guild? The art of Caltesla is incredibly beautiful, did you make that yourself? :o I feel like you might over-use punctuation a tad, especially in the 2nd paragraph - if you read it to yourself there's a lot of pauses per sentence and it feels a bit strange to listen to. I really like the character background of Locke so far (and Locke is an exceptionally cool name choice), he's seeming like a really likeable and appealing character with a lot of room for growth and development - hearing more about his past in future chapters would be really cool! I also loved how you described Caltesla whilst Locke was walking to the guild, really set the mood of the town and painted a great impression of how the town appeared to the characters. The story itself seems really well-written and very interesting with a lot of cool characters, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where it goes next and how he gets on in the first few days of guildhood.

One other small thing I noticed - you start off in present tense with "where a lone Espurr is walking on foot towards Caltesla" but then swap to past tense for the rest of the story. Is this intentional? I don't know enough about writing styles to comment but it seemed a little odd to me haha.

There's a few minor spelling/grammar errors (eg "one was a long") so proof-reading again could help but overall I think it's a great story so far and I'm really looking forward to chapter two!

PS: I never really check FF&W but if you post a new chapter please message me or something so I can read it :D

Yay! A reply! Finally! ^^
Thank you for the reply! It really motivates me
to become a better writter!
  • I was making a prologue for the 'fic but I decided not to continue it, so all of its contents were dropped into the first paragraph. And yes, the Great War will be discussed in future chapters
  • No, I didn't! Its from Bravery Default
  • Thank you for pointing that out, I'll try to minimize my punctuation marks
  • Thank you :3
  • That was not intentional! ~_~ I just didn't know how to start ;-;
  • Aye! Aye! I promise chapter two will be better (hopefully :|)
 

Etherion

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The Forgotten Prologue
Trumpets pierced the peacefulness of the kingdom, but there was nothing to celebrate about, it was a warning of the impending doom.

An army of Pokemon charged upwards into the castle grounds, all wearing a crest in which Caltesla considered enemies - it was the mark of two daggers crossing, with the left one longer than the other, it was the mark of evil. No kingdom guard could stop them, so a special platoon was called in to defend.

A group of Shuckles known as the Shuckle Patrol trudged towards the incoming outlawed Pokémon, casting Sticky Web attacks in an attempt to stop the attackers. But it proved useless, claws, tails, wings, fangs tore through the web and continued on like nothing had happened. They roared and screamed, some laughed because they could easily taste victory, the kingdom was in a state of chaos.

As they approached the kingdom doors, the Shuckle Patrol formed a barrier to defend the kingdom, but the bandits easily knocked them out. And soon enough, not one of the kingdom's forces were moving, the army of outlaws stopped in front of the big wooden doors of the castle. "Give way, give way, to the soon to be king!" A large Garchomp stepped out from the crowd and mocked whoever was inside the castle. "You call yourself a king, face me, or I will burn your kingdom to the ground!" It sneered.

"Face me! Face me in battle!" cried the Garchomp. A bright light emerged from the castle doors and it opened. A lone Pokemon with a sword in its hands appeared. It wore a crown and cape that made him had a royal aura, it was the king itself. "You leave me no choice!" The king poised himself in a battle stance, with its sword pointing at the Garchomp's crest. "I will unleash my hidden powers to stop you! You have terrorized this land long enough!" It directed its sword up in the sky and cried, "Mega Evolution!" The gems on the Gallade's crown covered it in a brilliant light, so pure that it drove away the exiled Pokemon from the kingdom, out of fear. The Gallade began to transform into a much powerful form.

The blades on its head grew and curled, the cape around him grew larger and was recolored blue and white and from his arms emerged blades. When the light finally stopped shining, a Mega Gallade equipped with its sword faced the Garchomp, with stepped back a few paces. "Well, I see that you mastered Mega Evolution," it sneered at the Gallade. "But your forgetting one, single thing," the Garchomp said, mockingly. "Mega Evolution!"

Dark light covered the Mach Pokemon, its transformation began slowly. Its blades from his arms travelled to form its hands, spikes began to appear in its torso, and its head and tail broadened. As soon as the transfiguration ended, the battle commenced.

King Gallade sprang upwards into the sky and aimed a Slash attack at the Garchomp, it cunningly striked but the Dragon type protected itself with its arms. It tried to retaliate with a Fire Fang but the king deflected it with the help of its sword, once the Garchomp was open, the Mega Gallade unleashed a Close Combat attack by rapidly punching the Garchomp, the Ground type Pokemon tried to resist it, it was the clash of an immovable object versus a destructive force, but the immovable object skidded away because of the lightning speed punches. It planted its claws into the ground and stop it from going further down, little that the Gallade know that it was preparing for an Earthquake. Slight tremors shook the castle until it increased intensity, the castle began to tremble and crack. The Gallade braced for impact as the stone material the castle was made of began to collapse.

The Mega Garchomp flew towards the Gallade and pushed it towards the falling debris, but the Mega Gallade got hold of its tail and took the Garchomp with him.

The Gallade's final sight was his sword. Then everything went dark.

Hey Bardo :) I never got to thank you for your review, I'm really sorry for that, I'm here to say that I really appreciate your tips to become a better writer, and your in-depth comments and insights. It's been almost a year! XD Shheees
In which I post a crappy prologue that I wrote but decided not to post until now
 
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