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[Pokémon] For Want of Spirit (one-shot, 11)

Dragonite Ernston

I rival Lance's.
149
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Jun 15, 2016
This is the Cyrus x Giratina fic that I was talking about in the plot bunny thread that wasn't really a plot bunny...

For Want of Spirit

------------​

It was lonely here. But Cyrus liked it that way. As he sat here on a platform in the Distortion World, there was no interference of anybody to disturb his thoughts. His thoughts on how to form that new world of his – the world without spirit. His pure, colourless thoughts that made him consider everything stoically and rationally.

But no matter how hard he tried, he could not clear his mind. As his thoughts ran through his plans and schemes and inner philosophies, they kept looping back to what that damned trainer had said.

"Spirit is what makes this world worth living in!" the trainer had said. Quite forcefully, at that. "If it weren't for spirit, we wouldn't have the world we're in now! We couldn't enjoy life for what it is. I wouldn't be friends with my Infernape here either," he had added, "if we didn't share the same fighting spirit that let us become Pokémon masters. Or with my Floatzel, my Crobat, my Gardevoir, my Garchomp, or any of my Pokémon!"

"Enough with your blathering!" Cyrus had shouted. "Is this how you justify spirit as something worthwhile?"

Cyrus knew that that trainer – was his name Tom? No, Gary? No, it was Lucas – was wrong. But something deep inside of him also knew that that trainer was indisputably right. He wanted to banish that part of himself – the part that was constantly reminding him about his emotions – but that part stubbornly refused to let go of him.

He looked up at the dark sky. The sky was always dark here – like the murky darkness of the "spirit" that was still a part of him. He did not want to feel anger, bitterness, or frustration. But right now, he felt something else, something less charged – a longing for something familiar. A way out of all this.

Suddenly, something roared far away. Cyrus looked around for the sound. He ended up looking behind him, and saw Giratina flying above. Was it disturbed? Did it still feel the hatred against him? Cyrus watched Giratina circle overhead above him. To try and clear his mind, he concentrated his thoughts on watching Giratina fly above him. Watching the Pokémon that had captured him and put him in this place in the first place. Watching its graceful motions as it curlicued around in the air, twisting and turning this way and that—

Where were these thoughts coming from? Had that trainer – Lucas – really rekindled something inside of Cyrus that he could not put out?

A thudding noise shook Cyrus out of his thoughts. Something had landed to his left. He turned and saw Giratina, in its six-legged form, walking towards him.

He simply sat there, not moving, pretending to ignore the giant dragon that was walking towards him. The pretense was half-true – he had nothing to do with the dragon, and did not want to attract its attention. It had grabbed him once – he didn't want to go through that again.

Giratina itself would have nothing of that. It walked straight up to Cyrus, folded up its legs, and sat down beside him.

There they sat. Cyrus was trying to concentrate on planning out his new world again, but he could not banish the thought that there was a gigantic dragon that was the ruler of this world, sitting right next to him as if nothing was wrong.

But then again, nothing was wrong. Cyrus wasn't doing anything to harm it anymore – nor could he, as Uxie, Mesprit, and Azelf had fled for their own world again. It would be foolish to try and take this dragon on with his bare hands – that would both violate his own principle, and be impossible – Giratina would overpower him as quickly as the fight started. Giratina seemed to notice that, as it could now sit down beside him without any fear. Cyrus tried to keep his gaze unfocused and contemplative, but sooner or later, he could not resist peeking a glance at Giratina.

As he peeked at it, he could have sworn that it smiled at him. No, not a smile – it was just an upward curving motion of its mouth. But he called it a smile. Why then? A smile meant nothing to him.

He then felt a nudging motion at his left side. Now that he was powerless to stop it, Giratina was poking around at him, trying to play with him. It was nudging at him with its muzzle, and Cyrus suddenly felt like he was being tickled.

No! he thought. I must keep a straight face! But as Giratina kept trying to nuzzle him, he fell onto the ground, starting to laugh from the tickling. Giratina thought this was funny, and kept poking at him. Cyrus was horrified at what he himself was doing – he, the man of no spirit, was laughing? Preposterous! And yet he was enjoying it more than he had enjoyed anything since he was twelve years old.

Finally, Giratina moved out of the way, and took off again. Cyrus wondered where Giratina was going, but then, it came back instantly behind him.

Giratina was holding something in its mouth – a branch of humongous grapes, larger than any Grepa Berry that Cyrus had ever seen. Do grapes even grow here? thought Cyrus.

Giratina placed them onto the ground that Cyrus was sitting on, and picked one off for itself. Cyrus looked intently at the grapes for a few minutes, as Giratina kept biting on the one it was eating. When it had swallowed the whole lot, it looked at Cyrus again, as if to say, those grapes aren't going to eat themselves, you know.

Cyrus gingerly reached over and picked one off of the branch and bit into it. As he chewed, the taste lit something up inside of him. He had never had anything this tasty before, but whatever it was, to him it was heaven.

He suddenly realized what he was doing. No, he thought. I'm betraying myself!

He put down the half of the giant grape that he had not eaten, and turned away from Giratina again. Giratina walked around Cyrus, but no matter where Giratina tried to walk, he would just turn in the opposite direction.

Then, Cyrus felt a pair of leathery claws pick him up by the back of his collar, as he was loaded onto the back of Giratina's neck. The grape that he had been eating promptly fell into his hand as well.

Giratina growled once, and then launched its legs into the air as it took off.

Cyrus had to hold on for dear life, as Giratina flew higher and higher away from their platform. Suddenly, Giratina flew a loop in the air, and Cyrus started falling down. Giratina swooped under and Cyrus fell on top of it – now in its six-winged form. Cyrus could barely hold on to one of Giratina's back ridges as it kept flying.

Suddenly, a hole opened up in front of them where they were flying, and they launched back into the regular world. They had exited from a waterfall somewhere near Veilstone City, and were now flying high up into the sky.

Cyrus could make out the boundary of Sinnoh, and then the boundary of all of Japan. As they kept flying higher and higher, the air got thinner and thinner, and Cyrus started to run short of breath. Giratina noticed this, and turned down.

As adrenaline coursed through Cyrus' body, he realized that he was feeling it. And the rush was awesome. He had never experienced anything like it before, and he loved the feeling, even though he had tried with all his might to hold it back. Before this, he would have dismissed it as a simple biological reaction, but now that he was experiencing it himself for the first time, he could not resist the feeling, nor did he care to resist.

At that thought, Giratina folded its body inward, diving even more quickly to the ground. Just as they were about to crash into a forest, however, a hole opened up again, depositing them back inside the Distortion World. Giratina crashed into a platform, knocking it downward a few metres. They lay there for a few moments, both in a daze.

As Cyrus got up and dusted himself off, he suddenly had an impulse to run up to Giratina and hug it. He had never felt this exhilarated his whole life – and Giratina was the one responsible. As he tried to embrace Giratina, it made a purring sound that Cyrus could feel all over his old, skinny body.

Then, Giratina got up and yawned, turning back into its six-legged form in the process. As it did, Cyrus became aware of his own drowsiness. As Giratina curled up and laid its head down, Cyrus decided that he would use Giratina's side as a pillow, and lay down within Giratina's lap. Giratina then fell asleep, its wing covering Cyrus like a blanket as he, too, gave in to the Sandman's will. His last thought before falling completely asleep was that – perhaps – spirit wasn't such a bad thing after all.
 

Miz en Scène

Everybody's connected
1,645
Posts
15
Years
Hahaha, hihihi, xD, *chortle*, *snicker*, *laugh* and etcetera.

I'm actually loving your light-hearted, one-shot, semi-anecdotal fics which you've been posting recently. This one just pretty much took the cake. Yes, it's completely out of character, yes it's a horrible perversion of both the philosophies and dispositions of two antagonistic characters, and yes it feels like you wrote this on crack, but hell I love it. In fact, have you seen the movie poster for 'My Neighbour Totoro'?
Spoiler:
This is it. Remind you of a scene from your fic? Yes? Well, I couldn't stop smiling after that cognitive leap from Giratina to Totoro, and I continued smiling throughout the fic. Not because it was heartwarming or anything, it's too absurd to be actually heartwarming (maybe someone else), but it was funny, if only because of how much you perverted these two. And the best part? There's no reason! One of the things I like to point out in my reviews is that you need a reason for everything so that the story doesn't seem like it's some sort of asspull but I'm ignoring that here. The mere fact that there's no reason given as to why the 'fallen angel' of the Pokémon trinity is acting like a docile Skitty makes it incredibly cracky in its own right. Now add it with that awkward boy-meets-x moment and you get a funny Cyrus acting like a teenager again.

So yes, I commend you. Commend you to the fullest. This may have been meant as a serious endeavour to portray both Cyrus and Giratina in an actual relationship (if so I apologize), but I cannot take it that way for some reason. It's just too surreal. I wonder… what name should this ship be given?
 
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Dragonite Ernston

I rival Lance's.
149
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Jun 15, 2016
Hahaha, hihihi, xD, *chortle*, *snicker*, *laugh* and etcetera.
I'm actually loving your light-hearted, one-shot, semi-anecdotal fics which you've been posting recently. This one just pretty much took the cake. Yes, it's completely out of character, yes it's a horrible perversion of both the philosophies and dispositions of two antagonistic characters, and yes it feels like you wrote this on crack, but hell I love it.

Dang, I knew they were out of character somehow.

I wanted Cyrus to come out of his character, not be OOC in the start. Unless that was just the final result that you're talking about.

This is it. Remind you of a scene from your fic? Yes? Well, I couldn't stop smiling after that cognitive leap from Giratina to Totoro, and I continued smiling throughout the fic. Not because it was heartwarming or anything, it's too absurd to be actually heartwarming (maybe someone else), but it was funny, if only because of how much you perverted these two. And the best part? There's no reason! One of the things I like to point out in my reviews is that you need a reason for everything so that the story doesn't seem like it's some sort of asspull but I'm ignoring that here. The mere fact that there's no reason given as to why the 'fallen angel' of the Pokémon trinity is acting like a docile Skitty makes it incredibly cracky in its own right. Now add it with that awkward boy-meets-x moment and you get a funny Cyrus acting like a teenager again.
Mm hmm. It was a crack pairing, apparently.

I wanted to portray Giratina as a gentle monster when not provoked, and somebody who can really give some love. I've gotten other comments that Giratina's acting like a kitten as well.

So yes, I commend you. Commend you to the fullest. This may have been meant as a serious endeavour to portray both Cyrus and Giratina in an actual relationship (if so I apologize), but I cannot take it that way for some reason. It's just too surreal. I wonder… what name should this ship be given?
It's already known as PlatinaShipping. But sure, if you think of it that way, I'll take it as a compliment too XD
 

icomeanon6

It's "I Come Anon"
1,184
Posts
16
Years
I wanted Cyrus to come out of his character, not be OOC in the start. Unless that was just the final result that you're talking about.
Don't worry, I think that's exactly what he was talking about.

I must say, I'm most impressed with the good humor of this and Of Electrodes and Magnetons. It's the kind of humor that's derived from simple but amusing situations, not just a bunch of gags.

No! he thought. I must keep a straight face!
This is where I started laughing. The image of this serious guy sitting in a dark, bleak alternate dimension getting nuzzled by a giant monster and starting to crack up is priceless. Mizan's definitely on to something with the Totoro picture, and the fact that anything involving Cyrus and Giratina would make anyone think of My Neighbor Totoro is evidence of crack overdose, but it's so good!

But yeah, if you were in fact trying to play this more straight-faced, you lose big time. xD Giratina's overt playfullness combined with the suddenness of the transition between brooding-Cyrus-with-flying-monster-circling-overhead and Cyrus-getting-tickled-by-giant-kitten-like-monster makes for delightful silliness. If you want to come across as more serious, I would advise making the story longer and making Giratina less kitten-like. I wouldn't change it, though, it's great as it is. :D

I'm too bushed right now to scour the story for grammatical mistakes, but there were none that stuck out to me. As with Electrodes, the writing felt smooth and didn't distract at all from my enjoyment of the story. Make sure you're around for the next PC Get-Together so you can participate in the Small Writing Contest; you've got a knack for one-shots.
 

Dragonite Ernston

I rival Lance's.
149
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Jun 15, 2016
Don't worry, I think that's exactly what he was talking about.

Alright then, that's all good. I made him OOC on purpose, in that case :D

But yeah, if you were in fact trying to play this more straight-faced, you lose big time. xD Giratina's overt playfullness combined with the suddenness of the transition between brooding-Cyrus-with-flying-monster-circling-overhead and Cyrus-getting-tickled-by-giant-kitten-like-monster makes for delightful silliness. If you want to come across as more serious, I would advise making the story longer and making Giratina less kitten-like. I wouldn't change it, though, it's great as it is. :D

Well, I wanted it to be both a little silly (originally, I wanted to give a warning that it would be a little cracky) but still emotional. Guess I failed on the second part XD
 
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icomeanon6

It's "I Come Anon"
1,184
Posts
16
Years
Well, I wanted it to be both a little silly (originally, I wanted to give a warning that it would be a little cracky) but still emotional. Guess I failed on the second part XD
I wouldn't say you "failed" in that regard; it's just awfully hard to handle both silly and emotional in such a small space. The emotion is definitely there, it's just washed out by the silliness. If you want to do both to better effect, I think you'd need a higher emotional to silly ratio, and the only way I can think to do that is make this a longer story with more scenes.

At any rate, I was joking with the "lose big time" bit. At worst, you've only met your goals part way, and that happens with even the best of authors.
 

Bay

6,385
Posts
17
Years
Yay, a CyrusxGiratina fic, and a good one at that! :D

First, this won me over:

He then felt a nudging motion at his left side. Now that he was powerless to stop it, Giratina was poking around at him, trying to play with him. It was nudging at him with its muzzle, and Cyrus suddenly felt like he was being tickled.

No! he thought. I must keep a straight face! But as Giratina kept trying to nuzzle him, he fell onto the ground, starting to laugh from the tickling. Giratina thought this was funny, and kept poking at him. Cyrus was horrified at what he himself was doing – he, the man of no spirit, was laughing? Preposterous! And yet he was enjoying it more than he had enjoyed anything since he was twelve years old.
This is just too cute. :P And yes, third on the Totoro! XD

I actually love the way you structured this one shot. You first have Cyrus thinking over about the spirit and then Giratina comes along to play with him, making him realize having a spirit is part of being human. All of that in one silly, cute package. :) That's actually the short of interaction I would like to see in a CyrusxGiratina fic, haha.

Real quick, as for your concern over wanting this a combination of emotion and silly, I too think perhaps at least have Giratina less kitten like (though I lLOVE your take on the legendary :3 ) would fix that a bit. However, to tell the truth, I think this works much better. Maybe it's because it's nice seeing a lighthearted Cyrus story for a change. ;) That, and I like stories where the legendaries aren't what they seemed. XD
 

Dragonite Ernston

I rival Lance's.
149
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Jun 15, 2016
I wouldn't say you "failed" in that regard; it's just awfully hard to handle both silly and emotional in such a small space. The emotion is definitely there, it's just washed out by the silliness. If you want to do both to better effect, I think you'd need a higher emotional to silly ratio, and the only way I can think to do that is make this a longer story with more scenes.

Nah, it's okay. As long as there is some hint of emotion there, I don't mind if it's completely overshadowed by the silliness.

Yay, a CyrusxGiratina fic, and a good one at that! :D

And the only one at that. :D

I actually love the way you structured this one shot. You first have Cyrus thinking over about the spirit and then Giratina comes along to play with him, making him realize having a spirit is part of being human. All of that in one silly, cute package. :) That's actually the short of interaction I would like to see in a CyrusxGiratina fic, haha.

*leans in and whispers* That was just a plot device to get them together - if I just had them getting together, it would be much less effective :P

Real quick, as for your concern over wanting this a combination of emotion and silly, I too think perhaps at least have Giratina less kitten like (though I LOVE your take on the legendary :3) would fix that a bit. However, to tell the truth, I think this works much better.

Your opinion has been duly noted.

Maybe it's because it's nice seeing a lighthearted Cyrus story for a change. ;)

How many of those are there, anyway? XD

That, and I like stories where the legendaries aren't what they seemed. XD

Yay, I actually got something I was aiming for! :D
 

bobandbill

one more time
16,920
Posts
16
Years
I rather enjoyed this story - it was an interesting and amusing 'what if' tale I thought. I will agree with the other reviewers that it was a bit too amusing to be totally heartwarming for me, but I kinda like the level of both amusement and 'aww' this story provided. I supposes it's a case of not quite getting what you wanted, but getting something pretty good out of it anyway.
It was lonely here. But Cyrus liked it that way. As he sat here on a platform in the Distortion World, there was no interference of anybody to disturb his thoughts. His thoughts on how to form that new world of his – the world without spirit. His pure, colourless thoughts that made him consider everything stoically and rationally.

But no matter how hard he tried, he could not clear his mind. As his thoughts ran through his plans and schemes and inner philosophies, they kept looping back to what that damned trainer had said.

"Spirit is what makes this world worth living in!" the trainer had said.
'thoughts' seemed to be overused a bit too much for my liking there - I suggest changing one of them (perhaps the second, for something like musings?) so it doesn't sound too repetitive. The same with the phrase 'trainer had said' - watch for being too repetitive. The third sentence sounded a bit awkward to me as well, and feel it could use some rewording.

A way out of all this.
Might sound a touch better as 'A way out of all of this', but both work I suppose so up to you.
Giratina itself would have nothing of that. It walked straight up to Cyrus, folded up its legs, and sat down beside him.

There they sat. Cyrus was trying to concentrate on planning out his new world again, but he could not banish the thought that there was a gigantic dragon that was the ruler of this world, sitting right next to him as if nothing was wrong.
In addition with the kitten/cat-like behaviour of Giratina... I actually got a pretty big 'How To Train Your Dragon' vibe out of this bit. Any relation between the two or just coincidence, I wonder?
No! he thought. I must keep a straight face!
Like icomeanon6, this part made me laugh. XD
They had exited from a waterfall somewhere near Veilstone City, and were now flying high up into the sky.
As a beside, I liked this addition of game canon into the story - a nice touch I thought. =)


All in all this was quite enjoyable - good work with it!
 

Dragonite Ernston

I rival Lance's.
149
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Jun 15, 2016
'thoughts' seemed to be overused a bit too much for my liking there - I suggest changing one of them (perhaps the second, for something like musings?) so it doesn't sound too repetitive. The same with the phrase 'trainer had said' - watch for being too repetitive. The third sentence sounded a bit awkward to me as well, and feel it could use some rewording.


Ah, well, there was bound to be a problem with it sometime... thanks for htat.

In addition with the kitten/cat-like behaviour of Giratina... I actually got a pretty big 'How To Train Your Dragon' vibe out of this bit. Any relation between the two or just coincidence, I wonder?

I said later on another forum that it was probably subconsciously inspired by How To Train Your Dragon. Probably just coincidence, though XD

Like icomeanon6, this part made me laugh. XD
As a beside, I liked this addition of game canon into the story - a nice touch I thought. =)
All in all this was quite enjoyable - good work with it!

Thanks. :D
 
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