The Plot Bunny Thread - Page 12

RikuCrafter · #**276** October 6th, 2011, 08:03 PM

I wasn't 100% sure whether to reply to those questions here:

- Yeah, a Pikchen is a new Pokemon, only found in Veniron. It is a cousin of the Pikachu, sharing similar characteristics (but it's more of a rabbit than a mouse)

- Some of the Pokemon I create will be similar to current Pokemon, yes. I just wanted to create a whole Pokedex for my story, for a bit of an original take on Pokemon

- Yep, the trainer running is a plot point.

Thanks for replying and giving me this help!

Sinphony_#9 · #**277** October 13th, 2011, 04:03 AM

Okay, I may get into trouble for writing this down, but if there is a problem, please inform me right away. This is a plot synopsis for a M/M slash fic, so if it doesn't belong here, tell me or don't read it.
Now, here's my story for a SceptileXQuagsire relationship:

The story starts with a flashback to a Treeko hunting down a Pokemon to a pond in Hoenn. The grass type gets stuck on a rock near the center of the water and can't swim his way back. He gets picked on by a group of Woopers; however, one of them feels sympathetic to the green-colored lizard and helps him get back to shore. Once on shore, the Treeko's trainer captures the water Pokemon, and both of them become best friends.
Now, cutting back to present day, our protagonists, both at their final evolutions, are in a double battle against a rivaling trainer. Despite the odds being against them, the Sceptile-and-Quagsire dynamic duo come out triumphantly.

Later, their trainer takes a break near a secluded waterfall and lets the two be by themselves. Both of them start playing in the water. The Quagsire contemplates deep feelings for his gecko friend; however, he believes that his companion doesn't share the same feelings towards him. He gets excited when he sees his friend's wet, scaled body gleaming in the sun. The giant, blue salamander gets out and scurries off somewhere to relieve himself. Now by himself, the plant lizard starts to play with himself. He doesn't realize, however, that on a bush-covered cliff nearby, a certain water-ground type witnesses him jerking off as he does the same. After the Sceptile is finished, he starts to hear some grunts and smacking noise coming from where the Quagsire is hiding. Concerned for his friend, he hones in on the origin of the disturbance. What he finds startles him, for he sees his blue friend's hand and face covered in "you know what". Afraid that their friendship is severed, the Quagsire runs pass the Sceptile in tears. The plant lizard tries to go after him, but due to his mental state, the amphibian spits mud at him, slowing him down.

He spots him diving into the darker area of the water and decides to descend into the unknown after him. He has become a better swimmer since he was a Treeko. Before he can resurface, his palm-tree-branch-like tail gets caught under some debris and struggles to breathe for some time. Before his vision darkens, he faintly sees a blob of blue mass coming after him.

Sceptile reawakens in a underground cavern under the waterfall. He notices the Water Fish Pokemon on top of him and gently wakes him up. The big salamander becomes sad and tells him that he was afraid to confess his love to him. He believes that they wouldn't be friends anymore. The Sceptile says to him that they will always be friends. To hit his point home, the grass-type lizard caresses his slick-skinned companion and deeply kisses him. *It gets sexually explicit from this point, so I'll say that they made sweet love.*

After doing their dirty deed, they resurface at the waterfall and rejoin with their trainer. Their lives have changed for the better or for worse.

Okay, that's the rough draft version of the story, so I need some great advice from the professionals. Thank you for your time.

Astinus · #**278** October 13th, 2011, 07:37 PM

Slash fics are allowed. But quite a few of your scenes are too explicit for PC's rules, and if you had posted your story without checking first, you would have been banned. Which means that the scenes where the two characters have more physical revelations about their relationship shouldn't be posted on PC.

Other than that, the plot line sounds like a lot of romance fics. The way they meet, growing up together, secretly developing feelings, the sudden revelation of love, and then proceeding to the physical end-all. It's just a plot that's been seen before.

Doesn't mean you can't write it. Just that you'll have to put in a little extra of yourself in there to make it different from what's been seen before.

Sinphony_#9 · #**279** October 14th, 2011, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Astinus

Slash fics are allowed. But quite a few of your scenes are too explicit for PC's rules, and if you had posted your story without checking first, you would have been banned. Which means that the scenes where the two characters have more physical revelations about their relationship shouldn't be posted on PC.

Other than that, the plot line sounds like a lot of romance fics. The way they meet, growing up together, secretly developing feelings, the sudden revelation of love, and then proceeding to the physical end-all. It's just a plot that's been seen before.

Doesn't mean you can't write it. Just that you'll have to put in a little extra of yourself in there to make it different from what's been seen before.

I know it's your typical romance fic, so do you have any suggestions or know someone who can help me flesh out the story? Do you know any published romance short stories I can read to get my creative juices going?

Astinus · #**280** October 15th, 2011, 03:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sinphony_#9

I know it's your typical romance fic, so do you have any suggestions or know someone who can help me flesh out the story? Do you know any published romance short stories I can read to get my creative juices going?

For starters, you could not have the story end with the two being that ready to be completely physical with one another. They're just learning that the other is attracted to them. Never mind that the relationship is a male/male one, so the characters have to learn to accept that about themselves and each other. Then there's also the fact that Sceptile and Quaqsire aren't in the same egg group, so they have that going against their relationship. And the size difference, which would make it awkward for them to show affection to one another. (And maybe Sceptile would be afraid of hurting Quaqsire, since Quaqsire is 4x weak to Grass attacks.)

Take the time in the story to develop the relationship so that it's more believable. Spend the time on the back story and the characters' feelings/thoughts so the readers can understand why they feel the way they do about each other.

As for any particular romance fics, I can't really recommend any in particular. I stopped reading romance fics years ago. You can look through the romance fics for Pokemon on Fanfiction.net or take a look at the shipping fic forum on SPPf for some ideas.

Bay Alexison · #**281** October 16th, 2011, 04:56 AM

Yeah Sinphony_#9, going to have to agree with Astinus that the relationship with Sceptile and Quagsire seemed rushed. Like she said, take the time to develop their relationship. I have done a few romance fics and the biggest mistake I tend to do is rushing the relationship between the two characters. As I became more comfortable writing romance, I realized it's quite hard work to have the romance between the two character develop naturally. Heck, one particular pairing (not Pokemon) I'm writing now it took me two one shots and a short chaptered fic for me to establish their relationship and show how it's progressing. Pretty much I too will suggest looking over some Pokemon romance fics at FFnet and Serebii. If you want, I can help out with your story , though I'm not sure how well I'll give advice over romance between two Pokemon. XD Good luck!

Kura · #**282** December 1st, 2011, 09:17 AM

Kind of a random question..
But do any of you ever try to roleplay with a friend to iron out plot points? I read it somewhere and I thought "Hmm.. I wonder if that's actually helpful.."
I don't know whether to consider it..

Thoughts?

bobandbill · #**283** December 1st, 2011, 12:53 PM

I do not roleplay with others although at times I do talk about ideas I've had with someone. But I do know people who do that and I know it works for them, so there's something in it. Doesn't mean it would work for everyone though but it's not a silly concept. (In a way if you think about how characters will react to something you're just roleplaying with yourself via your characters, imo - so as long as the other person also knows your characters then there's not much different there).

swiftgallade46 · #**284** December 5th, 2011, 03:27 AM

Idea for an anime plot (feedback appreciated):
Each ledgendary Pokemon has a special item associted with them know as their respective "Ledgend Souls" These are the emodiment of the power of each ledgendary pokemon and can be used to power them up. Here is a list of the Ledgend Souls and the respective pokemon they belong to:

Spoiler:

After a psychological study involving hypnotism, Giovanni has remembered his last encounter with Mewtwo. Infuriated, he puts his research team to work to find out a method of obtaining Mewtwo. One of the researchers stubles upon and old article written about the Ledgend Souls. With an evil glint in his eye, Giovanni now comes to the realization that is he were to acquire these items, he would not only be able to control Mewtwo, but all other Ledgendary Pokemon as well! He begins forming squads of Team Rocket members (including Butch, Cassidy, Hun, Atilla, Dr. Zager, Pierce, Proffessor Nanba, Domino, even Jesse, James and Meowth etc.) to search for the souls, and demands research on manipulating the souls to control their respective ledgendary pokemon. Upon hearing this, Looker (who is doing an undercover reconnasance [I know I mispelled that] mission) immediately sends for help. However, the International Police are experiencing problems of their own with talk of Team Galactic reformation and does not have time to investiagte "old folklore". Discouraged, Looker turns to Gym Leaders, Elite Four Members and Champions. Some agree to help, but it's that time of year and many are too busy with the annual throng of challengers that visit each day to challenge them. Without enough aid to his cause, Looker travels to Unova to enlist the help of Ash who is staying at Soul City with Iris and Cilan as he continues toward Mistralton City. Eager to help, Ash heartily accepts Looker's invitation along with Iris and Cilan, just as Jesse, James, and Meowth are recieving invitations of their own. Suddenly, Ash has the idea to gather his other friends to help Looker's cause as well. With the help of his super-speed jet plane, Looker, Ash and co gather Ash's many companions over the years including some old rivals (Misty, Tracey, Paul, May, Max, Morrison, Barry, Gary, Trip, Georgia etc.) as well as some Proffessors for the sake of researching the locations of these souls. (Ivy, Juniper etc.) new characters meet old and everyone breaks up into groups some accompanied by the few Gym Leaders, Elite Four Members, and even Steven and Lance who had found the time to aid Looker. Now, it's a race against the forces of Team Rocket to see who can gather the souls first, command the ledgends and save or enslave the Earth. And with every soul he finds Giovanni gets one step closer to discovering the location of the most powerful Ledgend Soul of all: the Azure Flute.

psyanic · #**285** December 5th, 2011, 10:08 PM

@swiftgallade46

That is a lot of legendary Pokemon you're going to include. The problem with this is that you'll end up listing everything in a span of a paragraph, especially with the names and the items, and it'll be a jumbled mess, more often than not. Narrow the Pokemon down a bit, like say capturing the Legendary Pokemon of the Kanto/Johto region, since Team Rocket is the most prominent in those regions, therefore having a stronger following there.

I also see that you want to use the whole anime cast as well. I'll just warn you right now, it's extremely difficult to keep everyone in character. If they're not in character, use your own characters instead, otherwise it's pointless in my view. Also try narrowing down this gigantic character list as well, since including every person as a main character is like having an all-star team. Not all the stars will stand out as they're supposed to, so I call it wasted talent. Don't just slap in characters because they'd look good. Keep it simple, that's your basis. Too many characters means that you'll have to keep track of them and it will end up confusing the reader sometime later, if you choose to write this story.

The next thing I want to point out is that you say that items can control legendaries, but it should just simply be PokeBalls. Those control legendaries (since they are Pokemon), not items. I think it would be better if you said that the items are used to lure the legendary or another, but even that is a bit farfetched.

The plot itself just steers away from your original path that Giovanni wanted: Mewtwo. He tries to find it, but then strays off and decides to go catch every legendary Pokemon. If you're basing this story on Team Rocket catching all the legendary Pokemon, then you should just keep Mewtwo out. Giovanni is already greedy and cynical enough to want to catch legendary Pokemon to begin with. I think it would work nicer if Giovanni worked with some colleague, and they were archeological pals or something (Giovanni in Pokemon Special was a fossil collector...) and they came across the legend of the items. After Giovanni kills his colleague out of pure avarice, he sets out to catch the Pokemon. This is simply an example, by the way.

Okay, so I decided to re-read your plot a few more times, and the items look like what a Dragon Scale is in the games (10% damage boost for Dragon-type attacks), and similar items. I believe that your items are just like power-ups, so Lati@s should have theirs as the Soul Dew, to keep it canon. Heck, it even has Soul in the name so it fits! The whole item concept, to me, sounds odd and put off since Mewtwo was created by man and all, so I'd wonder where its item came from. As long as you can explain it well, I think Cynthia would be fantastic for this role, then I suppose your story will turn out fine.

swiftgallade46 · #**286** December 7th, 2011, 02:45 AM

well i was planning on making it a saga rather than one movie so the items an ledgendaries would be spread out more. (i should have said that earlier) i didnt use the soul dew or other already existing items (such as the orbs) because these item are supposed to more powerful. I stray from the original plot only out of Giovanni's greed but I do like the idea of giving him an accomplice (possibly leaders of other evil organizations so his plans can be extended to other regions) as for the pokeball idea I don't think pokeballs control ledgendary pokemon. they catch them but they far from control them. the ledgend souls were crafted by ancient tribes seeking to calm the ancient ledgendaries and keep their power from destroying the Earth. they were then locked away. Mewtwo's soul is a mutated form of mews which was formed by the doctors who created it. But of coursr they were killed by mewtwo and the item was lost forever before Giovanni even knew of it's creation. there. plot whole filled. :D thanks for the input amd yes Cynthia would be BEAST here.

SlightlyAwkward · #**287** December 23rd, 2011, 12:15 AM

I have recently found myself with a considerable amount of free time, insomnia and very little to do. So, I decided one thing that I’ve wanted to do for a while that I could do is some fanfiction, and I’d like to try and do it properly. My history in doing so isn’t fantastic due to poor ideas, badly executed good ideas and just not finishing. So, if I plan it out properly and work on it then I should be able to come out with something good. Not had too many ideas so far. But I have had one, I’m not completely sure on it though and that’s kind of why I’m here. Because there’s probably something I’m missing in thinking it through, or it’s just too clichéd which I’m rather worried about. So here goes something…

To clarify, Pokémon fiction, though that’d be fairly obvious… Anyway, the idea is generally an attempt at, I guess, a “trainerfic” set in a real place, the United Kingdom (because it’s the one place I know). The idea is of a National Pokémon League tournament held annually, much like the anime (regardless of however much I personally despise it) I suppose, 6v6 single elimination bracket style tournament held at the end of the summer. 8 badges to qualify? Why not? Seems to always work so why change it, but anyway. Because I’m setting it in a real place I’d rather focus on trying to integrate the idea of Pokémon and a League into the modern society in which we live opposed to just having anyone go around doing whatever like the anime/manga/games. The point that I’m trying to make is having the Pokémon League held essentially as a Summer Challenge for people who have left school at 18. Not everyone competing will be 18 though as younger people will maybe be doing it with a parent or something, or an older person trying it again or something similar. For the two months of July and August, 12 Gyms spread out across the country are open to challengers in a 3v3 single battle against a Gym Leader with the prize being a badge that contributes to the 8 required for qualification to the Pokémon League. So people can go to any 8 of the 12 gyms they choose in any order, usually to compensate for where you start out and are willing to travel to. (When deciding on locations I might increase it to 14 or 15 just to allow a decent coverage of the country. Although, obviously, not all of the gyms would be visited through the story.)

So I have a basic idea of a Pokémon League and if I’m honest it sounds really clichéd to me but you’re probably thinking “Ok, so what’s actually going to happen in this story?” and I’m gonna admit that I am probably waffling a bit in this explanation. Sorry. I wanted the story to follow the tales of 3 or 4 different trainers as they travelled around the country visiting different places, meeting different people, doing different things, having different battles, etc. The idea of this is that they all start in different places and take different routes but do along the way meet up with each other and sometimes go along together, intentionally and unintentionally. Just so it’s not 4 different people randomly meeting up by chance, two of them will know each other before the start of the story and will want to meet up at some point as they’re friends/rivals. There will also be a few recurring characters also challenging the Gyms that will appear to the main 4. Now, as I’m not the greatest fan of having starting out trainers having to train and catch an entire team that will lead them to victory, not to mention bad at writing such things or that it’d be quite difficult to do in 2 months and that 18 year olds are not going to have no experience with Pokémon at all, the main characters will have full teams or close to completed teams. But there will obviously be some weaker links and favouritism in the teams so they’re not exactly going o be 6 Level 100s or anything. And they will more than likely improve throughout the course of their journeys. Chances are that each of the trainers’ Pokémon will be introduced individually with some kind of backstory early on as to explain how they’d come to be as such but not all at once as an entire chapter of explaining why someone has what team they have would be very slow.

Just before I move onto the main characters themselves I’m wondering about writing it, because I’m following 4 (or possibly 3) people individually and the way the story is told will be different for each as they’re different people. So I’m just wondering is this difficult for the reader to go from one character who is all about just doing something to someone who’s thinking through every possibility and going a bit slower? And would I be able to alternate between the different narratives in a single chapter or would it work better to dedicate chapters solely to a single character. Or even split it up into different stories essentially, one after the other until a chapter or two when they come together. (Much like Kingdom Hearts Birth By Sleep for anyone who’s played as that’s how I’m thinking of the last option.)

As for the characters themselves, I was thinking 2 boys, 2 girls. The boys would be, I guess, like a double act. Equal and opposite. Friends since childhood and rivals in everything they do. They’d be starting in different places having moved away from where they grew up and would be keeping in contact to let each other know how they’re doing so can attempt to outdo the other as friendly rivals do. One of them focuses on strategy, tactics and skill. Very thoughtful, plans things and works things out so they go his way. The other, power, hit them and hit them hard. More about action and will force things into going his way, doesn’t necessarily think things through but regardless of what happens he’s likely to deal the damage. The Doctor vs The Master if you will. Since the one who focuses on power isn’t necessarily a brutish idiot. Actually, that isn’t the greatest comparison... Might have to get back to you on that one.

And then I realised while writing this out that the story might work better if it’s focused on just the two guys and their rivalry and reducing the other characters I had planned to recurring characters. Never the less, I might as well still mention the other two. The first girl is the daughter of a Gym Leader which provides a personal conflict for her as when she originally tries to challenge her mum she declines knowing that her daughter isn’t good enough to win and the journey to improve so that she can challenge again and hopefully win against a parent. The problem I encounter here is I wonder what is the point in this character? What relevance does she have to the others and how does she encounter them? Which I will obviously have to answer. The 4th character was the one I doubted the most as she shares the same problem in linking to the other characters and story other than that they are also in the Pokémon League challenge. I’m rather sceptical about this one as I feel that with lack of experience or knowledge of situations similar to the character’s I’d struggle to write her believably. As the idea for her was to be a runaway or someone living on the streets fighting for herself. I had the thought that she’d be a thief so that she can get food and an obvious target might be one of the other main characters.

And that’s really about it, these 4 people are attempting to challenge the Pokémon League and maybe even win it. So, I’m wondering if this is a good/bad idea, is it as horribly clichéd as I think it is? If it’s not a horrible idea, what have I not thought about that I need to consider? And would it work better with just the 2 main characters or the 3/4?

Ok, my first post is a lot bigger than I was expecting but never mind...

psyanic · #**288** December 23rd, 2011, 06:07 PM

Well SlightlyAwkwad, welcome to Pokecommunity and FF&W!

Now we got the introductions over, your plot is basically a giant OT fic. I'm not sure if you're familiar with that, but these are rather overused and extremely popular in the Pokemon fandom. When I mean popular, I just mean a huge number of writers decide to write one. The difference between yours and the standard clichéd fic would be that the story itself takes place in the real world rather than a Pokemon region. I don't really find the difference other than there would be cars, pollution, and other shining points of our society mixed in with cute adorable Pokemon running around smacking people silly.

I'm not trying to discourage you from writing it. I'm just telling you to make sure it's different from the thousands of other OT fics already written. It doesn't really matter how well written it is, it would still be rather boring. I'd suggest looking at other OT fics that are a bit different from the norm. Better yet, read a random OT fic (you can surf on other websites or even here!) and see exactly what not to do. Reading other fics will help you differentiate bad writing and good writing as well as understanding other aspects of the Pokemon world and interactions. Further more, your fic looks like it could be very cookie cutter. It a fic revolving around the characters, which is supposed to produce a conflict in some way or another. But it seems like everyone already knows each other or will meet each other very early (especially with the childhood friends/rivals ordeal. It's the same with Red/Blue from the original RBY isn't it?) and there wouldn't be anything happening, other than their friendship being mended or torn. I like that there is a character who's the Gym Leader's daughter. I'm sure that would bring something new to the table, like the necessity of beating their parent or something. Then again, we've seen that in the RSE games (Norman and your player). As for characters, that's all I can really point out. They've all been seen before and I'm not entirely sure if readers would be intrigued by it. Also, don't put in a character just to balance gender or for the point of having another one. Since you have no idea for your fourth character (that runaway girl), just don't put her in if she's just going to be either a plot device or useless later on. If you can write it well and flesh out some real conflict, I think that part would turn out fine.

And you can change the narrative to follow all the different characters. Personally, I'd prefer it that way since if you follow one character for too long, we'd be reading their description of the street they're on or how they train their Pokemon, which is what I would call a filler.

You said you wanted for the final chapters (I'm assuming) there to be the grand tournament. I don't think a full on 6 v 6 battle in every single chapter would be entertaining. Yes, battles are probably one of the most engaging parts of your story to the reader but with your number of characters (we're assuming you have four) in each round, imagine how boring and repetitive that is. And imagine how hard it would be for you to write it. I would say that you should limit the number of Pokemon in the first rounds (in the anime they have preliminaries where they battle 1 v 1, 2 v 2, etc.). Or you can just skip that and go to the real part of the tournament where it's say, the final 32 or something. And even then, I'd skip a few parts of the battle (like start a chapter in the middle of a battle). Just be sure to manage this part well so that it doesn't get boring or repetitive.

Finally, there's nothing really happening. If the Pokemon League Tournament in the country was a new thing and this was its first year in the making that would make it more interesting and see how well the officials handle it (not to mention all their mistakes they will make). I'd say it would be better with more conflict with the governing officials and all. But nevertheless, there's no point in the story. It's just following four people as they travel across England and get gym badges and go to compete in a tournament. If you can write it well, sketch out an interesting and engaging plot, as well as have a good amount of conflict in your story (don't forget conflict is what makes your story), I think the story will turn out well.

And since this is your first time writing a Pokemon fic, I'd recommend these two links: Writing Resources and The Beta Place. The writing resources link is pretty self-explanatory, all about looking at standard writing ideas and some help with Pokemon information (which you might want to look at if you want to put in a backstory to all 24-some Pokemon you want in your story). The Beta Place is a different thing. You sign up and get a beta reader, who will read your fic before you post it somewhere. They'll edit it, proofread it, and tell you what's good and what's bad. It's pretty useful especially for new writers like yourself.

SlightlyAwkward · #**289** December 23rd, 2011, 11:52 PM

I kinda expected a response like that with my worries of being too clichéd and such. I guess my main problem is what you said about making sure it's different from the however many that clutter the internet as I have a degree of familiarity with the genre. I just wasn't aware of how much I'd fallen into the trap of genericness. From the ideas I've thrown around in my head I can't seem to think of an idea to make it different that doesn't completely change the entire story to something new. Say, the idea of something bad happening to people who lose in the tournament for example death. But because so much would have to be changed about it, such as why it happens, how it's got away with, etc would alter the story and most likely remove the entire story leading up to the tournament. So I suppose that's an idea I could think of but it's something completely different. Not to mention the fact I had thought that (especially if I didn't include the 4th character) it'd be a much more light hearted affair with dashes of humour here and there. But throwing in the death thing would mean it probably shouldn't be funny.

Another thing that'd I'd thought about was the possibility of some sort of cult organisation or something similar attempting to obtain some kind of power like say Rayquaza for some sort of evil purpose that I won't detail. And then the obvious thing is that the main characters get involved somehow, my idea being that the organisation attempts to recruit one or more of the main characters, potentially succeeding. Thus getting the rest involved. But I did want to sort of stray away from the whole "Teenager challenging Pokémon League saves the world" thing that I imagine is overdone. Unless the specific idea isn't that bad?

At the moment, I'm feeling like the general idea of this plot probably isn't going to work now. Obviously I don't expect to create something spectacular on a first proper attempt but I'd rather not make it harder for myself by trying to do the same as everyone else but different or doing something that will most likely be lost in the sea of identicals... Not necesarily going to completely give up yet though. Hmmm. Tough choice.

Regardless, thank you for the comments and help.

psyanic · #**290** December 24th, 2011, 12:27 AM

Don't worry. That's why you're on this thread, right?

Remember that changing your plot is a good thing. I got trapped in that as well, where I refused to revamp a few things and decided that it was good as is. I eventually wrote a good number of chapters, which were all basically crap. Only when I actually read it did I realize that it was just garbage compiled of random words. I deleted the entire document and began fresh. Now I'm extremely paranoid before I actually post something. So don't be afraid to revise your plot, even if it's the little things you believe people won't notice. Those little things will show that your story is a new thing. Those little things will add up and make sure that your story is unique.

I actually really like the idea about people who lose being put to death. Okay, I don't mean I like people dying. I like that there's an extreme amount of pressure to win. This is what creates a motive. This is what makes your characters deeper. Don't be afraid if this little part will make your story longer. Your story can be as long as you like, just as long as everything in it is completely relevant to the plot. I suggest that you start out with an ending. A lot of movies are doing that, so your story would be told in hindsight. Since we know how it ended, how did it begin? That's what your story would dive into.

Death actually can be funny, depending on the mood of your story. Sure, death will obviously be a downer but Shakespeare had a few deaths and kind of made up for it with comic relief. That will take a lot of skill in writing to begin with but it could be possible. Just don't force it. On the other hand, with the cult thing, teenager saving the world is a bit overused as well. I'm sure you know a lot of OT fics actually try to be in-sync with the games so their trainer is typically involved in the teams (depending on the region) and set out to stop them and conveniently make it in time for the tournament. Meh.

But wow, I really really really like the death for losers idea. I might steal it xD

The general idea of your plot, which really focuses on the development of your characters and how they collide, should really be kept the same. I mean your characters are fine. You just have to give them a good world to play in.

bobandbill · #**291** December 24th, 2011, 12:28 AM

Quote:

Another thing that'd I'd thought about was the possibility of some sort of cult organisation or something similar attempting to obtain some kind of power like say Rayquaza for some sort of evil purpose that I won't detail. And then the obvious thing is that the main characters get involved somehow, my idea being that the organisation attempts to recruit one or more of the main characters, potentially succeeding. Thus getting the rest involved. But I did want to sort of stray away from the whole "Teenager challenging Pokémon League saves the world" thing that I imagine is overdone. Unless the specific idea isn't that bad?

You'd be right in that the 'main character saves the world' is a common thing one sees in an OT fic (probably because that's what happens in the games after all so that plot structure tends to carry through as well). Using a legendary Pokemon for (evil purpose here) is common in particular... so it's not a bad idea, but a done idea so if you do go down that path the execution would have to be good. Mind you the whole thing isn't needed for an OT fic and arguably for some the absence of that aspect is a good thing to see.

Ayutac · #**292** December 24th, 2011, 03:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobandbill

This thread is simply to post any story ideas you may have and receive feedback on them, or perhaps help provide feedback to other people’s ideas.

What a wonderful idea. I support that! And as I see, you explained everything good. Very nice done!

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobandbill

Or maybe you are unsure about how much potential it has or indeed if it’d make for an interesting story?

Regarding that point, I may quote:

Quote:

Originally Posted by LJ-Jornal v_m

Watt-Evans' Law:
There is no idea so brilliant that a sufficiently ham-handed writer can't make an unreadable story out of it.

Feist's Corollary to Watt-Evans' Law:
There is no idea so stupid that a sufficiently talented writer can't make a readable story out of it.

Sinphony_#9:
"Now by himself, the plant lizard starts to play with himself."
Why does he do that? Is that regular for him? Is this regular for Pokémon in general? Especially, how much is it too expect to have gay Pokémon? Is it more common in a specific race?

"Their lives have changed for the better or for worse." Good for them, but how will it go on? What will the trainer say, how will they continue to meet up with each other when "imprisoned" into Pokéballs?

"I know it's your typical romance fic, so do you have any suggestions or know someone who can help me flesh out the story? Do you know any published romance short stories I can read to get my creative juices going?"
As for that, why not write a "normal" romance with this theme (these Pokémon and all) as an writing excercise? Can not hurt, as I think.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kura

Kind of a random question..
But do any of you ever try to roleplay with a friend to iron out plot points? I read it somewhere and I thought "Hmm.. I wonder if that's actually helpful.."
I don't know whether to consider it..

Thoughts?

Do that from time to time, even alone. But only to see, if the fight moves are possible and not dumb (like avoiding a sword by falling on your back, like a beetle, and being defenseless against the next move).

swiftgallade46:
"[GoGo Giovanni: Collect the items!]"
I like the idea, but the hole would be, that Mewto wouldn't have something like that, since it is "merely" a clone.
"But of coursr they were killed by mewtwo and the item was lost forever before Giovanni even knew of it's creation."
Let me rephrase that: For the scienists to create such an item, they should know of its (theoretical) existence first. They would have reported it to Giovanni. And the problem with Mewto was in the first place, that they couldn't control it any longer. As far as I know, Pokémon are considered as Legendary Ones, if they are very very few of them (see Lugia), or even only one, and as such, they have their history. This history could be linked to the items. Well, except for Mewto, because it is very young, compared to its companions.
"Looker travels to Unova to enlist the help of Ash"
Ha. Hahahaha! Perfect! Even it may have been obvious, let's just get the kid who already encountered every legendary, maybe they will understand then. Also maybe we can make use of his power of infinite youth!
Really, I like it.

But all in all that is a book, nothing less. I don't know you, but I simply expect it to be too much for you. A trick would be to split it up into OneShots, e.g. the battle for Ho-Oh, the search for Raiku etc. So to say, just the highlights and not the riffraff between. Of which you at least should know what happens, else it won't be better that way.

So, now I'm to tired to read over the other people's plots, because it's late. These days I will take the next look.

EDIT: Oh wow, look! 5 Posts I was too lazy too read that time, but all of them were about one plot! So, my apologies I didn't criticize it last time.
So, psyanic said a lot of things and they are probably true (about this being a common plot; no idea since I don't know the fandom (yet)). But nevertheless I would disagree with his attitude. Remember Watt-Evan's Law: "There is no idea so brilliant that a sufficiently ham-handed writer can't make an unreadable story out of it." That said, your plot is not bad at all, just used. So, ask yourself what you want to write this fic for? If you want to get prayers from all readers, your plot may be a little bit common for that. But if you write it for yourself, the first important thing is to have fun and do not force yourself to anything. And I think, you should try to write this story as an exerise, because as it is with all things, exercise will make you better at it. Seriously, my first written-on-paper story I can remember was half a site and about a girl who got attacked by monsters but then woke up and found out it was all a dream. So original, huh?
On another side, I remember the Anime Lucky Star being without any big plot at all, but nevertheless it was fascinating by the little humor and nonsense and the lovelyness of the characters. The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya was hardly with any plot but nevertheless this self-righteous girl Haruhi and the "why am I doing this" boy Kyon were somehow so amazing you just kept watching. (Nevertheless the second Season was filler as… you know.)
To give the bad example (and so the example for the quote), I just finished reading a somehow retarded original story. The plot was not bad, there were magical stones who sealed a democratic evil behind some montains and since now the stones found their way back to the protagonists, it's kinda easy to see the ruler returned. But the writing was sooo bad. Not the grammar or something, but this little stupid details. The protagonists were able to wander a distance in the same time at it would go with horses, they eat breads for lunch (so to say, one for each), one protagonist was flipping out, when another undressed a female one trying to save her from death, like he never had saw the woman body before, the evil ruler tries to hide his return, yet on the other side he destroys cities and so on.

Fazit: You can create a fine story with an average plot, as long you look out for details.

To your original questions: Speaking about details you should be well informed about your characters before starting writing, so when you don't know anything about the fourth child better ignore it completely or thing more about her.
If you should change the point of view within a chapter or not is a kind of rhetoric question, because you are the one who will decide how long a chapter goes. If you were a funny one, you could change the point of view every paragraph and call it a chapter.
But I will try to help with an example. My favourite author's second book has about 70 chapters with about 20 A4pages each. That's a whole lot. And about the first 40 chapters, he gave 2 chapters to the human world, then 2 two the demon world and so on, if I remember correctly. He is awesome, so no one of the readers had a problem with that. In fact, sometimes it was used to build tension. "Wanna know what's going on? Well, wait until two other chapters are done!" Teasing, but fun. But on some point it annoyed me and I was waiting for those story lines to come together.

So, to make a suggestion, you should concentrate one one character a chapter, but there will be no problem if you shortly change the view to another one, be it for a cliffhanger at the end or maybe some evil guy who is plotting plans in the dark. But I would like to see the persons coming together at the end of the story (before league, just because they like travelling together).

mzmingle · #**293** January 9th, 2012, 08:18 PM

I have a story idea, I haven't got a very good plot yet, though.

Story Name: Skylanders: Nature calls!

Basic info: It's based on Skylanders, and Spyro goes around Sky Islands to save people from the evil Kaos. On the way he finds new friends, like Trigger Happy, Gill Grunt and Bash. Him and the other Skylanders have to get the different sources to stop the tornadoes and recreate the eternal source. Somewhere in the story Spyro falls in love with a fairy, Persephe (Per-seff) which halts the journey to complete the eternal source.

What do you think? Have you got any good ideas to make it better? anyone here got Skylanders or better, completed it?

Astinus · #**294** January 10th, 2012, 04:28 AM

SKYLANDERS!

I thought no one else here would play that game.

Right now, your fic seems like a basic novelization of the game, except with more background on the characters. (I only have the 3DS version, so I might have missed several things due to the differences in the game. Like the 3DS villain is Hektor and not Kaos.) You'll want to add more to the plot to make it different than what readers could get from just playing the game.

Also, what do you mean by the romance with Persephe stopping the journey? Maybe I missed something (again, the 3DS version is really lacking on story for Skylanders), but you'll just want to be careful on making the romance not take over the plot by having it stop the journey unless needed.

mzmingle · #**295** January 10th, 2012, 04:55 PM

Well in the game you find a fairy called Persephone. This is going to be her sister, and after finding a few more friends he'll fall in love with her, and stay in that town for at least a chapter, then she gets taken by Kaos on the next chapter and he carries on to save her and the world. I can't think of any other ideas to add, though. Maybe He could find a new Skylander, or i don't know D8

roen52 · #**296** January 23rd, 2012, 10:35 PM

I have an idea for a Legend of Zelda Fanfiction which is not titled as of yet. This is based off my opinion that each Hero, with the exception of maybe Wind Waker Link, are Reincarnations of a previous Hero.

Basic Summary: Set in a world where the Great Flood never occurred. The goddesses answered the Hylian's pleas for help in a different. All they needed was another hero like the Hero of Time to set things right. The only problem was that the Hero of Time technically never came to be due to the Princess's act of sending the Hero back into his original timeline. Because they couldn't get a Hero from their timeline, the Goddesses grabbed the soul of a Hero from an alternate timeline. They placed the soul in the womb of pregnant woman. Only they don't release that she's pregnant so therefore the soul is split in two.

Fearing that the Goddesses had abandoned them, the Hylians, Gorons, and Zoras fled from their homes taking refugee in lands far from Hyrule. Over the years Hyrule took drastic turns for the worst under Ganon's rule. Monsters, demons, and various other creatures of nefarious intent flooded the fields, towns, and forests. A dark mist prevailed throughout the lands. The monsters seemed to be drawn to the strange mist.

Every year in a village named Ordon, the villagers select two of their young men to gather the necessary supplies to replenish the barrier which keeps the mist away. The barrier holds for a year then quickly fades after the year has past. This year it's up the to twins Liam and Ryan to gather the needed materials.

Nine-Toes · #**297** February 14th, 2012, 07:03 AM

Hi, I am currently writing a fan fiction based on Pokemon and I lime my plot and am having trouble thinking of a reason for something that happens in the story itself.

You see I am setting my story twenty to thirty years after the events of black and white. A huge war brome out that lasted several years. Some where and somehow down the line I want all regions to ban Pokemon training. This for purpose to give one of my main characters a bit of a shady background due to his involvement in underground Pokemon training and battles. The problem is I can't think of a reason for the regions to ban training. So I am asking is does anyone have any suggestions or ideas for the banning of training and battling?

If I put this in the wrong forum I do apologize

Hi, I am currently writing a fan fiction based on Pokemon and I lime my plot and am having trouble thinking of a reason for something that happens in the story itself.

You see I am setting my story twenty to thirty years after the events of black and white. A huge war brome out that lasted several years. Some where and somehow down the line I want all regions to ban Pokemon training. This for purpose to give one of my main characters a bit of a shady background due to his involvement in underground Pokemon training and battles. The problem is I can't think of a reason for the regions to ban training. So I am asking is does anyone have any suggestions or ideas for the banning of training and battling?

If I put this in the wrong forum I do apologize

bobandbill · #**298** February 15th, 2012, 02:13 AM

@ roen52 - late, but it sounds like an interesting introduction to the story, and a neat 'what if...' take on LoZ.

How does said barrier keep the mist away though?

@Nine-Toes:

Quote:

A huge war brome out that lasted several years.

Not quite sure what you mean by 'brome' there. As for reasons... a few directions you could take it is that a) Plasma was successful, or the governments banned Pokemon for similiar reasons put forward by them. b) Pokemon are no longer safe to use for whatever reason (disease?) off the top of my head. The latter is something I've seen used a fair bit and you'd still have to think up the details for either option (how did it happen? What were/are the consequences? Was it easy to ban; ie to implement the ban and to convince most people to obey such an order given Pokemon training is a huge part of the world canonically?)

Nine-Toes · #**299** February 15th, 2012, 05:07 AM

Thanks for the tips bobandbill. As for the "brome" incident. I tend to type real fast and sometimes for get to recheck what I type. What I meant was "a was that lasted many years."

FourCartridge · #**300** February 22nd, 2012, 02:17 AM

So, I need help bouncing around a few ideas and fine-tuning the plot's nuts and bolts of my fanfic on this site; The Ballad of Greg Thomas, if anyone's willing to help. Naturally, these contain major spoilers for the fic, so read at your own peril if you want to enjoy it like a "normal" reader:

Spoiler:

First off, Greg's main shtick as an OC from the "real" world is that he fights the dangers of Unova on his own, with the pipe wrench, Beretta, and various other things he will get thought his trek. I'm seriously considering having him make Molotov Cocktails, pipe bombs, and dry-ice bombs to help him expand his options, any other ideas will be appreciated, except for new guns; in the fic, Greg's pistol is the only firearm in Unova.

The main thing I worry about when writing is that I don't want to turn the fic dark. I want to stay close to canon and it's tone. How do I do this, given Greg's weapons?

Second, if you read the latest chapter, Greg has made some new enemies in the Musketeer trio, sans Keldeo. Knowing their backstory, I want to take a new spin on it. Instead of them fighting humans to stop them from expanding, I want to turn them into a lesson on how "hate begets more hate". Greg eventually learns of their history, and their recent attacks on humans; I plan to darken them a little by telling a tale of how they stopped a TVA analogue trying to better the lives of people and Pokemon. Greg will spend the chapters when he's traveling between towns generally being hunted like a dog by them. Eventually, Greg will get tired being scared and victimized by them, and confronts them in combat, messing them up, to put it lightly. When he goes for the killing blow, he sees the damage he inflicts on the Musketeers, he goes into a "what have I done?!" monologue. I plan on having him redeem himself when Keldeo sees them, bawls his eyes out at their injuries(they're not dead though), and then Greg rescues him in pity from a forest fire the battle created. I don't think that's enough for the Musketeers to forgive him though.

On that note, I'm thinking about Greg getting a Pokemon "sidekick" somepoint in the story. I want him/her/it to be a fully developed character in their own right who joins Greg willingly, without him even capturing the Pokemon in a Pokeball. I'm thinking of having Keldeo be it, as a sort of reward for Greg learning his lesson, but I don't think what he did is enough for Keldeo and the Musketeers to forgive him, let alone join him willingly. Any ideas on such a character?

On to the next thing: N. When Greg first encounters him, a combination of him not having any Pokemon and his total lack of knowledge about them leads them to have a friendly chat. Greg will soon come to think of N as a supportive ally, and a general shoulder to cry on about his isolation in Unova when they meet. When N reveals he is the leader of Team Plasma, Greg has a "This isn't like you! Snap out of it!" scene with him. Which leads to N's plan for Greg; When Greg talks about his life back on Earth and his loneliness and isolation, N comes to think that he is completely miserable without Pokemon, and "judges" him to be one of the very few humans who deserve to be in the separated world he wants to create, which leads to Greg's motivation for stopping Team Plasma; if they succeed, he's going to be a permanent resident of Unova, like it or not, and he doesn't. How do I write their interactions after N's "betrayal" when Greg tries to stop him, while still taking into account their former friendship and N's opinion of Greg? Is this too Gary Stu-ish?

About the whole Ghetsis being the bad guy thing with the plan to be the only one with Pokemon; When he learns of the absence of Pokemon in the "real" world, he decides to just say **** it and mount an invasion of Earth when his original plans are far enough. Reality ensues when he is squished like a bug and arrested by the US military. N is pretty much going to replace Ghetsis as main antagonist with the idea I just wrote about. Is this a good idea?

Next up is the theme: When he learns of the whole Truth vs. Ideals war, Greg decides it is the most petty argument he's ever heard about. He won't take sides until he is forced, which he takes a third option: Doing the Right Thing. How do I separate this from the other two?

Also, the big climax I really don't want to drop is this; When N become the Hero of Ideals and becomes Zekrom's champion, Greg is rejected by Reshiram because of his beliefs. Greg pushes on without her, and when the final battle comes, it's Greg facing down Zekrom on his own. I'm attempting to make it the most epic fight I will ever write, but will the reader just plain laugh at it because it's unrealistic?

And once again, how do I write all of this while staying close to game canon and its tone?

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