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  #2726    
Old May 8th, 2012 (03:46 PM).
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How do you feel about the way gay or transgender people, or anyone under the LGBT umbrella, are represented in the media?

I honestly think that in most media they're just used with a bunch of stereotypes, which is one of the reasons people have so many ideas that LGBT people are certain ways. However, there are also good times when we aren't. *goes into dumb as a brick mode* Look a rock!
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  #2727    
Old May 8th, 2012 (05:00 PM).
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I guess I should tell you all about my crush now. Since you are ALL so NOSY, I will reveal:

He's blond. Aren't they all? He has one blue eye and one brown eye. His face is sooo cute, cause his nose is cute and his lips are cute and...ugh. So sappy.

He's not big, he's not muscular, but he isn't flabby. Not by a long shot. One of his friends picked him up to put him at the end of a line in class, and I got a flash of skin. Soo naughty. >: ) But yeah. I can't describe his cuteness. But when he talks it's like I melt. Except I don't. Hah.

HALP!
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  #2728    
Old May 8th, 2012 (07:18 PM).
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Originally Posted by ThatWhiteKid View Post
I guess I should tell you all about my crush now. Since you are ALL so NOSY, I will reveal:

He's blond. Aren't they all? He has one blue eye and one brown eye. His face is sooo cute, cause his nose is cute and his lips are cute and...ugh. So sappy.

He's not big, he's not muscular, but he isn't flabby. Not by a long shot. One of his friends picked him up to put him at the end of a line in class, and I got a flash of skin. Soo naughty. >: ) But yeah. I can't describe his cuteness. But when he talks it's like I melt. Except I don't. Hah.

HALP!
My god he has different coloured eyes? That is amazing! I can see why you are crushing down so hard on him already.. My question is does he know you are/ is he gay..?
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  #2729    
Old May 8th, 2012 (08:01 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Magdalena~
I gave SwiftSign a "not-new member crown"
Misread as "hot new member" crown

As to the current topic (which seems to be your parents' view on gay people), my parents aren't ideal. They're not religious in any way - at least to my knowledge - but I can tell from Mum's comments on the subject that she sees it as gross or "yuck" as she put it. She cringes and says "Ew! Ew! Ew!" every time two men kiss on TV. I always give her a filthy "come on, it's 2012" look, but it never seems to stop her.
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  #2730    
Old May 9th, 2012 (12:38 AM).
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Strange question time, just because I haven't had anything to say in forever, lol. I've noticed that for a long time, well before I began to question my own sexuality, I've been sort of fascinated by gay couples. I guess fascinated isn't really the right word, but they just seem... better. Like they're normal, and straight couples are weird. To the point that I think if I were a girl, I would prefer girls over guys. (Currently it's the opposite.) I can't really explain why this is... but I just thought it was odd. Anyone else ever notice similar feelings/is that a common thing, or is it just me? Maybe it's just something that comes with not being straight, I dunno. lol

Again, just asking because I haven't had anything to say for a long time. lols


Edit:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
Misread as "hot new member" crown :P

As to the current topic (which seems to be your parents' view on gay people), my parents aren't ideal. They're not religious in any way - at least to my knowledge - but I can tell from Mum's comments on the subject that she sees it as gross or "yuck" as she put it. She cringes and says "Ew! Ew! Ew!" every time two men kiss on TV. I always give her a filthy "come on, it's 2012" look, but it never seems to stop her.
Yeah, my mom did that too. She actually paused the TV once while two guys were kissing, and said "Isn't that disgusting?" This was way back, but even then I was just like "No, not really." lol

Oh, and speaking of eye color... if you have different colored eyes, it's called heterochromia, and if both of your eyes are the same color, it's called homochromia. So, almost everyone on the planet is homo, whether they know it or not. loliknowthatwasstupid

(I like how after posting that and saying I have nothing to say, I end up responding to two different posts. lol)
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  #2731    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:46 AM).
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Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
I've noticed that for a long time, well before I began to question my own sexuality, I've been sort of fascinated by gay couples. I guess fascinated isn't really the right word, but they just seem... better. Like they're normal, and straight couples are weird. To the point that I think if I were a girl, I would prefer girls over guys. (Currently it's the opposite.) I can't really explain why this is... but I just thought it was odd. Anyone else ever notice similar feelings/is that a common thing, or is it just me? Maybe it's just something that comes with not being straight, I dunno. lol

I thought the same thing. I always found the non-straight couples to be the more normal. I don't think it's odd, but it could just be a thing with not being straight.
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  #2732    
Old May 9th, 2012 (06:34 AM).
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Originally Posted by QuilavaKing
Strange question time, just because I haven't had anything to say in forever, lol. I've noticed that for a long time, well before I began to question my own sexuality, I've been sort of fascinated by gay couples. I guess fascinated isn't really the right word, but they just seem... better. Like they're normal, and straight couples are weird. To the point that I think if I were a girl, I would prefer girls over guys. (Currently it's the opposite.) I can't really explain why this is... but I just thought it was odd. Anyone else ever notice similar feelings/is that a common thing, or is it just me? Maybe it's just something that comes with not being straight, I dunno. lol
I've found this too - looking at gay couples just seems to make far more sense to me than when I look at straight ones. I just look at straight couples and I sort of think "how on earth are you two attracted to each other?" and in my mind they're sort of a spectacle. Whereas I see gay couples and don't even give them a second glance because to my mind, that's the norm. I think it is something that comes with being gay lol.

Though at the same time, I know I've seen/heard of a million straight couples that are unhappy, and I've never seen or heard of an unhappy gay couple. I think this gives me a boosted feeling of superiority which my logical side tries to beat with a stick
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  #2733    
Old May 9th, 2012 (08:00 AM).
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If anyone has a spare 10 minute they should probably watch this video. Shows exactly why gay marriage needs to be allowed.

(p.s. keep tissues nearby)
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  #2734    
Old May 9th, 2012 (08:07 AM). Edited May 9th, 2012 by Sodom.
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There are no words. I just... oh god I'm in tears, I hate you. When it showed footage of them together and happy, it just made me feel sick. Shane... he has all that footage of them laughing together and if I had to sit there and watch something I could never have again, it might make me suicidal. That was just too much.

EDIT: I can't sleep. I need to write a cathartic letter to Tom's family so that I can feel like I've processed this, then I might be able to. So bear with me:


Dear Bridegroom family,

You are disgusting. There is not one redeeming quality about who you are or what you do. You are the most filthy, wretched, evil little *******s that I have ever had the displeasure of hearing about, and I hope you die. I hope you all die in the slowest and most painful way that the universe can provide. I want you to whimper; I want you to feel every last bit of torment you put Shane through as the last of the life is drained from your worthless bodies.

I am an atheist, yet you make me want to believe in Heaven so that you can all go to Hell. That way you can continue to feel the pain searing through every part of you, without relief, for the rest of eternity.

Love,
Andy.
P.S. Sex with men is amazing. Mrs Bridegroom, I'm sure you know what I'm talking about, but the rest of you boys are seriously missing out.


OK now I feel better . I may regret this in the morning, but right now that is exactly how I feel and I make no apology for it. People like those don't deserve to exist.
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  #2735    
Old May 9th, 2012 (12:25 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
Dear Bridegroom family,

You are disgusting. There is not one redeeming quality about who you are or what you do. You are the most filthy, wretched, evil little *******s that I have ever had the displeasure of hearing about, and I hope you die. I hope you all die in the slowest and most painful way that the universe can provide. I want you to whimper; I want you to feel every last bit of torment you put Shane through as the last of the life is drained from your worthless bodies.

I am an atheist, yet you make me want to believe in Heaven so that you can all go to Hell. That way you can continue to feel the pain searing through every part of you, without relief, for the rest of eternity.

Love,
Andy.
P.S. Sex with men is amazing. Mrs Bridegroom, I'm sure you know what I'm talking about, but the rest of you boys are seriously missing out.

This accurately describes my feelings on this as well, thanks for posting it so I didn't have to.
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  #2736    
Old May 9th, 2012 (12:39 PM).
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All my fellow Americans who are going to be 18 by November better get themselves registered to vote so they can vote for Obama who has just come out in full presidential mode in support of gay marriage. [read article] [thread over in OC]


On QK's question about ever feeling like gay couples are normal and straight couples are weird: I've seen a lot of bad straight couples, but then that's what I've seen, like, 95% of the time. I've noticed that same-sex couples seem a bit insular though. Like, more head-in-the-clouds and also the kind where people have compromised the things they like to do in order to feel like they're closer to their partners. I dunno, maybe that happens just as often in straight relationships, but I do get the feeling that with straight couples it's already mostly a given that they're going to have different tastes in a lot of areas.
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  #2737    
Old May 9th, 2012 (12:52 PM).
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Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
All my fellow Americans who are going to be 18 by November better get themselves registered to vote so they can vote for Obama who has just come out in full presidential mode in support of gay marriage. [read article] [thread over in OC]
I know it's great that he's saying he supports it, but actions speak louder than words. I'd rather him do something about it rather than just sit back and comment after people's lives were broken yesterday in North Carolina...
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  #2738    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:07 PM).
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That video is awful. That poor poor man. I was close to tears. He deserved to marry Tom. Tom's family are awful awful people.

I was thinking today. Now it doesn't seem present here, and not so much in this generation but has anyone else noticed the transphobia within the LGB sphere?
Personally gay marriage is not an important issue to me, yes, gays deserve equal marriage rights but here's something major - Trans people deserve the right to be legally recognised as the gender they identify as, however in 13 states the right to recognition is illegal. In Texas a trans female was given a ticket for going into a womans bathroom. Why? A "real" woman didn't like it.
Tell me it's just me but it seems the focus is always on GAY rights, not the rights of other people, they're human beings and they deserve it just as much. They can't marry either, they can't get jobs, many trans people are in poverty merely because their ID cards and so on say the opposite gender to what they are.

Take Thailand for example, "ladyboys" are shunned in society, while the media accepts them they are always the comedy element in a show, often pushed into prostitution and cabaret, that's not the life they want. Many of them have University degrees but they can't get jobs because they're not recognised as women. If these people had ID which said female then the quality of life they have would be greatly improved.

These are just my thoughts, what do you think?
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  #2739    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:16 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Kawaii~ View Post
Tell me it's just me but it seems the focus is always on GAY rights, not the rights of other people, they're human beings and they deserve it just as much. They can't marry either, they can't get jobs, many trans people are in poverty merely because their ID cards and so on say the opposite gender to what they are.

Take Thailand for example, "ladyboys" are shunned in society, while the media accepts them they are always the comedy element in a show, often pushed into prostitution and cabaret, that's not the life they want. Many of them have University degrees but they can't get jobs because they're not recognised as women. If these people had ID which said female then the quality of life they have would be greatly improved.

These are just my thoughts, what do you think?
I don't really understand, do women have a higher chance of employment than men? o.O

As far as I know, in the UK, you don't have to state your gender to get a job. So you are probably perceived as whatever you present yourself as in the interview. Being such a small minority I don't know how widespread this is, I've only ever seen one (noticable) transgender person working in a café before.

The thing is, without taking the step with gay rights then even smaller minorities don't stand much of a chance of similar rights.

Also, I was under the impression trans people can marry as long as their birth certificates say opposite genders to their spouse - so does that mean a gay-trans man can get married? o.o idk.
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  #2740    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:16 PM). Edited May 9th, 2012 by Oryx.
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Re: Bathrooms...I just don't get it. I really don't see why unisex bathrooms can't be a thing. Like look at a women's bathroom.



Stalls. The worst thing that would happen is that someone would HEAR SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX USING THE BATHROOM. Why are people so opposed to unisex bathrooms?! I just don't get it.

I feel like the fight for trans rights is tough because it's almost an entirely different fight altogether. While it deserves just as much support as gay marriage, it requires different laws and different protests and paying attention to different pieces of legislature, etc.

Edit: Saw this on Facebook and wanted to share.

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  #2741    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:21 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SwiftSign View Post


I don't really understand, do women have a higher chance of employment than men? o.O

As far as I know, in the UK, you don't have to state your gender to get a job. So you are probably perceived as whatever you present yourself as in the interview. Being such a small minority I don't know how widespread this is, I've only ever seen one (noticable) transgender person working in a café before.
Haha, no, but in Thailand (and many other countries) you do have to present your gender at interviews - Beautiful women apply and the cards say male, they're not going to hire you because it's a hassle. The UK is good on trans rights!

Quote:
Originally Posted by SwiftSign View Post
The thing is, without taking the step with gay rights then even smaller minorities don't stand much of a chance of similar rights.

I appreciate that, but it does seem the gay aspect is the focus, the other parts of the spectrum seem to me to be ignored.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SwiftSign View Post
Also, I was under the impression trans people can marry as long as their birth certificates say opposite genders to their spouse - so does that mean a gay-trans man can get married? o.o idk.

Yes, trans people can theoretically marry if the birth certificate says opposite to the spouse, technically gay trans people can marry. Straight trans people can't because a lot of places have laws that forbid these records to be changed.
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  #2742    
Old May 9th, 2012 (01:43 PM).
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I know it's great that he's saying he supports it, but actions speak louder than words. I'd rather him do something about it rather than just sit back and comment after people's lives were broken yesterday in North Carolina...
Don't ruin my moment. :P

But yes, actions do speak louder. I'm assuming that his stance now means he'll be under more pressure to put those words into actions. He'll be held to a higher standard now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Kawaii~ View Post
<rest of post omitted for shortness's sake>

These are just my thoughts, what do you think?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toujours View Post
I feel like the fight for trans rights is tough because it's almost an entirely different fight altogether. While it deserves just as much support as gay marriage, it requires different laws and different protests and paying attention to different pieces of legislature, etc.
This is the biggest problem, I think. Trans people are not the same as gay people and we don't have the kind of positive exposure in a lot of people's minds like gay people do. I think a lot of people who are only sort of okay with gay people have a hard time wrapping their head around the idea of trans people. (Heck, lots of them have a hard time wrapping their heads around the idea of bi people.) I bet a lot of these only-slightly-okay-with-gay would get all reactionary if you tried to educate them about trans people and the things we need to make society more fair and equal and that's [expletive!] because it makes some people who would otherwise support us fully take a kind of lukewarm stance.

I have seen some prejudice toward trans people from the LGB crowd (though mostly the G), but not as outward actions or anything, but more in assumptions and all of that kind of thing. Like, more of a lack of understanding and sympathy, and sometimes a kind of superiority kind of attitude like "you trans people just hold on and stop getting in the way of our gay rights" although never quite that direct or mean.


Also, Toujours, that is a telling infographic right there.
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  #2743    
Old May 9th, 2012 (06:20 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SwiftSign View Post

I know it's great that he's saying he supports it, but actions speak louder than words. I'd rather him do something about it rather than just sit back and comment after people's lives were broken yesterday in North Carolina...
What do you expect him to do? The President can't unilaterally change the laws of the nation. Without Congress, the President can't do anything but talk. And even if he said something prior to Amendment 1 being passed, I doubt that would have swayed any votes. 61-39 is still a pretty steep margin. . .
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  #2744    
Old May 10th, 2012 (01:04 AM).
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As far as the Obama thing is concerned, I think he is doing an incredibly smart thing, choosing his moment to come out in favour of same-sex marriage. Recent polling showed that 50% of Americans now support same-sex marriage, and actual opposition to the concept has fallen 15% in the last decade. When you consider the linear progression we've made toward support for same-sex marriage, the assumption would follow that these numbers will continue to turn in our favour rather than away from it. So in an attempt to win the Presidency next four years, this was the perfect time to announce his position shift because he may end up getting more votes from being in favour of gay marriage than being publicly against it. It's also far enough from the election that he can escape suspicion that it's a campaign tactic.

I love this, I think it's the smartest thing he could have done, and it's only good for us, right?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf
"you trans people just hold on and stop getting in the way of our gay rights"
Yeah, damn you trans people. GTFO.

......wait. In what way do trans people get in the way of gay rights? I've never heard this before and I honestly can't fathom how trans people are holding the gays back lol
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  #2745    
Old May 10th, 2012 (09:39 AM).
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Like I've said, I don't hear this said overtly, but look at what was said just in this thread:

Quote:
The thing is, without taking the step with gay rights then even smaller minorities don't stand much of a chance of similar rights.
That kind of sounds like "We have to have gay rights before we can have other minority rights." Just in general it says that gay rights are important (and I don't dispute this, don't think there's many in here who would) but if I were to reword it to be about trans rights I wonder how many people would agree with it even though gay and trans people should both have equal rights.

"The thing is, without taking the step with trans rights then larger minorities don't stand much of a chance of similar rights."

You could argue whether this is true, but it just sounds like a justification. Not my rewording. I mean the original statement.

I'm going to call upon my 20th century history knowledge and say that it reminds me of the civil rights movement in America where you'd have groups organizing for equal rights for black people and black women were told to serve coffee. And in some cases it was done consciously because they feared that if you "went too far" it would hurt the "primary" focus of the movement.
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  #2746    
Old May 10th, 2012 (10:19 AM).
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Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
Like I've said, I don't hear this said overtly, but look at what was said just in this thread:

That kind of sounds like "We have to have gay rights before we can have other minority rights." Just in general it says that gay rights are important (and I don't dispute this, don't think there's many in here who would) but if I were to reword it to be about trans rights I wonder how many people would agree with it even though gay and trans people should both have equal rights.

"The thing is, without taking the step with trans rights then larger minorities don't stand much of a chance of similar rights."

You could argue whether this is true, but it just sounds like a justification. Not my rewording. I mean the original statement.

I'm going to call upon my 20th century history knowledge and say that it reminds me of the civil rights movement in America where you'd have groups organizing for equal rights for black people and black women were told to serve coffee. And in some cases it was done consciously because they feared that if you "went too far" it would hurt the "primary" focus of the movement.
That seems to be me.

I'm not saying we have to have gay right before anything, I'm saying it's a logical step in a direction that will ultimately make it easier for trans people to gain similar rights. After all, if gay marriage is permitted then all trans people can get married, no? It's a step in a right direction.

Also I have no idea what your analogy has in relation to it.
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  #2747    
Old May 10th, 2012 (01:31 PM).
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Earlier my mom was talking about how there should be different words for same-sex spouses rather than husband and wife, so there's no confusion. I told her when a girl says she has a wife, it should be pretty clear, but she thought it wasn't because she once met a girl who referred to her partner as "husband," and then my mom felt embarrassed when she met the husband that she had asked so many questions about her assuming she was a man. I can understand that being an awkward situation, but yeah.. I dunno. It seems that most people just say husband or wife or partner or something, and personally I don't think that there's a need for new words, but Mom seems to think so, so .... lol. What do you think about that? :P
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  #2748    
Old May 10th, 2012 (03:48 PM).
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Would like to join the group
Welcome, please await someone to disperse the new member crown. Anyway, any special reason for joining?
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  #2749    
Old May 10th, 2012 (04:14 PM).
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Welcome, please await someone to disperse the new member crown. Anyway, any special reason for joining?
Just thought it would be a good place to join for me
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Old May 10th, 2012 (05:32 PM).
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Hey there CoraCora, welcome to the group! I shall add your name to the list now . Generally though, in Other Clubs you're not meant to just post "I'd like to join" without saying something that contributes to the discussion - even if that just means telling us a little about yourself.

So, please, tell us about yourself! Are you gay, bi, trans, something else? or are you questioning what you are? Or maybe you know someone who is in the LGBT community and want to show your support? Give us a bit of an insight into yourself :D

Quote:
Originally Posted by voltianqueen
Earlier my mom was talking about how there should be different words for same-sex spouses rather than husband and wife, so there's no confusion. I told her when a girl says she has a wife, it should be pretty clear, but she thought it wasn't because she once met a girl who referred to her partner as "husband," and then my mom felt embarrassed when she met the husband that she had asked so many questions about her assuming she was a man. I can understand that being an awkward situation, but yeah.. I dunno. It seems that most people just say husband or wife or partner or something, and personally I don't think that there's a need for new words, but Mom seems to think so, so .... lol. What do you think about that?
We don't need to go inventing new words. 'Husband' and 'wife' are what we should be called, because when you get married that's what you become. It's as simple as that. The reason we can't have different words is because that implies a separation between homosexual and heterosexual couples - and separate is not equal. Different words come with different connotations. If we allow society to believe that we are different in any way from just any regular hetero couple, then we might as well just call the whole thing off, because what was it all for? We are fighting for marriage, not a separate quarantined version for marriage.

Not to mention the confusion that would cause on official forms. When you're filling out details for something like your emergency contact and you have to tick a box indicating their relation to you, the option will say "Husband/Wife" - so what would we tick? 'Friend'? 'Partner'? It's insulting. When I get married, I'm going to refer to my husband as exactly that - regardless of what the official term might be.



@Scarf/Swiftsign - here's the way I see it. There are two ways people fight for equal rights: there is the way SwiftSign fights, which is essentially a results-based strategy where we do what needs to be done to get the rights for everybody as quickly as we can. This is my attitude as well; I can see that society is only just becoming OK with gay people and I can see things happening which will in the end result in everybody getting equal rights (including trans people, since the rights gay people get could only logically be extrapolated to them). The good part about this type of fighting is that it's safe. We're not rocking the boat; we're doing what we have to do and it's fairly likely that one way or the other, in the end it's going to run smoothly. The bad part about it is that it could be seen as 'settling' for less than the community as a whole deserves because while everybody shares in the equal rights, it's only the gay people that get to experience the shift in public attitude that comes along with it.

Then there's Scarf's way, which basically refuses to settle. It's a more indignant and aggressive approach which refuses to take anybody's crap and doesn't leave anybody behind. It's arguably the better and more noble way to think because after all, we all deserve equality and why should we have to follow what society thinks is right in order to achieve what is actually right? But the downside to it is that it is way more risky because if we come on too strong to the general public then we run the risk of alienating them, because trying to change their attitudes toward everything at once is more likely to spook them and get them off our side. In the end it's a choice between reality and idealism. Not everybody is willing to be enough of a risk-taker to adopt the ideal.
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