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  #326    
Old July 23rd, 2011, 08:11 AM
-ty-'s Avatar
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Quilava, I understand that you are going through a difficult transition in you life; I have a few things that may enlighten your perspectives so that you can come to closure with your sexual idenity.

More, and more, it is being accepted by the Christian community that the bible was, in a sense, a code of ethics in order to play your part in society (2000 years ago) as deemed by the revelations of God.

Therefore, it COULD be interpreted that it WAS a sin for men to sleep with other men because it hindered procreation. Like the passage about "not spilling your seed upon the earth." Procreation was vital for a society to thrive back then; however, as we have seen with India and China, their massive population has caused quite a problem in their societies. Perhaps, as the population of GBLT people inclines, it is a sign that maybe our society does not need to rapidly procreate in order to thrive. Also, the addition of GLBT people in society has proved to be quite useful in providing homes to orphaned children. So, in other words, if another book of revaluations were to emerge now, what might it say? The people 2000 years ago looked to a divine power to know right or wrong, and then put it into text to improve their society. Why should we not do the same? Remember, slavery was customary, and necessary for mercantilism in that time; the bible reflected that belief by stating "slaves, obey your masters, whether they be cruel or gentle." Conversely, with time, most Christians do not accept slavery as a right, but as a wrong. I am not sure if this will help expand your views about your sexual identity, even if it is a little bit.
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  #327    
Old July 23rd, 2011, 02:10 PM
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Meh... I can't just alter the religion because I feel like it.

I know accepting that explanation would make life a billion times easier, but I just can't. I'll just have to deal with it. =/
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  #328    
Old July 23rd, 2011, 04:43 PM
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QK, there are many gay churches and gay-friendly churches out there. You don't have to exclude either part of yourself. I don't know exactly what kind of religion you were raised with so I don't know how supportive your version of Christianity would be, but you can find a lot on the internet that might help. There are plenty of ways you can reconcile your beliefs.
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  #329    
Old July 23rd, 2011, 05:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
QK, there are many gay churches and gay-friendly churches out there. You don't have to exclude either part of yourself. I don't know exactly what kind of religion you were raised with so I don't know how supportive your version of Christianity would be, but you can find a lot on the internet that might help. There are plenty of ways you can reconcile your beliefs.
To expand, they really are everywhere. I live in rural Ohio, and there are 4 within 20 miles of my house. lol You just have to look!
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  #330    
Old July 24th, 2011, 05:17 AM
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Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
The only problem with that, is that I don't not believe it. As much as I've always hated that little detail, I can't just throw away my core beliefs, after 19 years, and hope I was wrong all this time. I know that causes some major conflict... but I don't think there's anything I can do about it. =/
Well, it can happen. People stop believing in their religions because they can't reconcile them with their sexuality all the time - but that's not really what I was saying. All I was suggesting is that you disregard their teachings on sexuality. If you want to still believe in God and the rest of it then that's totally up to you, but churches are infamously terrible with this subject. And yeah as Landorus and Scarf said, you could find a gay friendly church so you wouldn't have to make any compromise.

Quote:
Originally Posted by QuilavaKing
I've been trying to look that term up for like 30 minutes now, to no avail. So... yeah, I feel dumb now. I actually just wanted to talk about it though.
Sorry, it was a term I made up lol. I was making a joke that your invitation to chat meant that you were coming onto everyone, but yeah that was a bad joke and clearly very poorly executed - but yeah if you want to talk about it that's what we're here for you can VM me or add me on MSN at any time, I'm always up for talking.
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  #331    
Old July 24th, 2011, 09:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
Well, it can happen. People stop believing in their religions because they can't reconcile them with their sexuality all the time - but that's not really what I was saying. All I was suggesting is that you disregard their teachings on sexuality. If you want to still believe in God and the rest of it then that's totally up to you, but churches are infamously terrible with this subject. And yeah as Landorus and Scarf said, you could find a gay friendly church so you wouldn't have to make any compromise.
Well, like I said, they can't just change the religion like that... Even if they make a church, it doesn't make it right in my eyes. The bible basically says that all Gays go to hell, which I've always thought was really stupid, and doesn't even make a whole lot of sense, but it says what it says.

That said... I've literally made myself sick with worry over this. I haven't eaten in two days, or slept (much) in 4... and it's just getting worse. So, in the hopes that it saves me from... you know, dying... I'm just going to accept it. I'm surprised it took this long for me to realize it anyway, thinking back a bit. lol



Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
Sorry, it was a term I made up lol. I was making a joke that your invitation to chat meant that you were coming onto everyone, but yeah that was a bad joke and clearly very poorly executed - but yeah if you want to talk about it that's what we're here for you can VM me or add me on MSN at any time, I'm always up for talking.
Well, that's what I thought, but I didn't want to just assume that, and look like a retard. lol

Btw, do you have skype? I don't use MSN, and I'd rather not download another IM for one person. Oh, and apologies in advance if I bug you endlessly... I'm moving, and will be without pretty much everything but my laptop for a few days. lol
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  #332    
Old July 24th, 2011, 03:54 PM
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This is my personal view on faith:
We shouldn't base our relationship with God on churches and following religious ritual strictly. Our relationship with God should be personal.
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  #333    
Old July 24th, 2011, 08:36 PM
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Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
Well, like I said, they can't just change the religion like that... Even if they make a church, it doesn't make it right in my eyes. The bible basically says that all Gays go to hell, which I've always thought was really stupid, and doesn't even make a whole lot of sense, but it says what it says.

That said... I've literally made myself sick with worry over this. I haven't eaten in two days, or slept (much) in 4... and it's just getting worse. So, in the hopes that it saves me from... you know, dying... I'm just going to accept it. I'm surprised it took this long for me to realize it anyway, thinking back a bit. lol



Well, that's what I thought, but I didn't want to just assume that, and look like a retard. lol

Btw, do you have skype? I don't use MSN, and I'd rather not download another IM for one person. Oh, and apologies in advance if I bug you endlessly... I'm moving, and will be without pretty much everything but my laptop for a few days. lol

I know that this may sound drastic and uncomfortable, but I really really really think that you need to talk to someone confidentially. Whether it is a walk in a health clinic, school, physician, or anyone else who will make you feel safest and have you full confidentiality. Some of your comments really scare me, I too exhibited self-hatred. It is tough, but it is even tougher holding it all in.


PLEASE, if you cannot find anyone to talk to, just ask someone on here to talk, that includes me. There are so many people that are on here that you want talk to; I just don't want you to hurt yourself.
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  #334    
Old July 24th, 2011, 10:24 PM
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If there is one thing that everyone can agree on, it's that the Bible can be interpreted in many ways.

You may have been told one way, but read around - there are a lot of pro-gay interpretations out there.


And if you continue to be sick like this, you really should see a doctor. :\
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  #335    
Old July 24th, 2011, 10:34 PM
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If there is one thing that everyone can agree on, it's that the Bible can be interpreted in many ways.
This is true. For example, everything mentioned about gay relations being wrong is in the Old Testament. In the New Testament, Jesus pretty much says that everything in the Old Testament is moot. That's why modern Christians aren't required to circumcise their sons or wear only clothes made of one material, and why no one is punished for cutting their hair or being blind in a Church.

One of the most common arguments as to why the teachings of religion falter on this is that Jesus has wiped away every other rule in the book in question (Leviticus), so it makes very little sense to only keep that one and none of the others. Not sure if that comforts you at all though :(
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  #336    
Old July 25th, 2011, 04:06 AM
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PC crashed on me while I was typing this up earlier... but I'm up in the middle of the night again anyway, so I might as well rewrite it now. (This time I woke up because I dreamed a spider was running across my bed toward my face. lol)

Quote:
Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
I know that this may sound drastic and uncomfortable, but I really really really think that you need to talk to someone confidentially. Whether it is a walk in a health clinic, school, physician, or anyone else who will make you feel safest and have you full confidentiality. Some of your comments really scare me, I too exhibited self-hatred. It is tough, but it is even tougher holding it all in.
It might be just because they work for the school, but me and several of my friends have talked to school counselors who promised to keep everything secret, only for them to go and tell every teacher at the school right after. One of my friends even got taken to an insane asylum (Or something similar anyway. It was specifically for teens.) over the weekend, because the counselor thought he was going to hurt himself, when he was just complaining about people making fun of him. I know the kid pretty well, and I can't imagine him doing anything like that, so I don't know where she got it from.

Long story short, I don't trust anyone who's paid to do that job, because they may not care about you in the slightest, as long as they get their money.

Quote:
Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
PLEASE, if you cannot find anyone to talk to, just ask someone on here to talk, that includes me. There are so many people that are on here that you want talk to; I just don't want you to hurt yourself.
Well, I would never intentionally harm myself, no matter what happened to me, so you don't have to worry about that... and my trouble eating/sleeping isn't intentional either... it's just that whenever I think about this (which is pretty much always) I lose my appetite, and it wakes me up, etc.


I'm not sure if there's really any more for me to say, but we can talk if you want. In fact, I think I'd kinda like to... all of my stuff is getting moved out of my room tomorrow, since we're moving, so all I'll have for the next couple days is my laptop... having some more people to talk to would be nice. lol

Anyway... things definitely do suck right now, but don't worry about me too much. I do know for a fact that it will get better, and I still have a bright future ahead of me. It's just a matter of time until I get there.
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  #337    
Old July 25th, 2011, 11:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
Well, I would never intentionally harm myself, no matter what happened to me, so you don't have to worry about that... and my trouble eating/sleeping isn't intentional either... it's just that whenever I think about this (which is pretty much always) I lose my appetite, and it wakes me up, etc.
That's a relief. I'm kind of disappointed and disturbed by what your counselor did. I've personally never had someone in that kind of position do anything like that, but I hope you can still find someone who you could trust to talk to if you needed to. It's good that there are a lot of us here, but it would be better if you had someone you could talk to face to face.

I'm not a religious kind of person and can't really help with that struggle you have, but I think if you could talk to someone from a gay friendly church you might find someone who could give you that kind of help. Your location says Oregon so I did a quick google search and found this:
http://www.gaychurch.org/Find_a_Chur.../us_oregon.htm
Maybe you could visit one of them, speak with the priest/pastor even.

I hope things get better for you soon.
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  #338    
Old July 26th, 2011, 07:59 AM
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Hey, just wanted to let everyone know that I ate 3 full meals yesterday, and slept for 8 hours. (Not as much as normal, but I had insomnia for 3-4 straight months last year, so I'm amazed I recovered this fast. lol)

Either way, I'm doing alright now.

Also, I kinda just noticed, I have a full page dedicated to me in this thread... sorry to cause so much drama. D:
I'm actually a pretty happy go lucky person normally. lol
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  #339    
Old July 26th, 2011, 11:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
Also, I kinda just noticed, I have a full page dedicated to me in this thread... sorry to cause so much drama. D:
I'm actually a pretty happy go lucky person normally. lol
No worries.

And now for something completely different: another discussion topic. Do you want people to know you're _______ when you first meet them?

It's hard for me to exactly keep it a secret because of my appearance, but I'm someone who wouldn't want anyone to know because I have self-esteem issues I think it would be nice to get to know someone without them having preconceptions.
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  #340    
Old July 26th, 2011, 11:32 AM
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  #341    
Old July 26th, 2011, 11:44 AM
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Hope you don't mind I post here even though I haven't come to this thread in a while.

To answer the current question that Scarf posted, absolutely no.
As you've said, there are assumtions made immediately. Later if they actually care or the subject comes up, sure. I'll tell them.

It's just not important to who I am as a person. :/
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  #342    
Old July 26th, 2011, 01:40 PM
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Originally Posted by Kiyoshi the Polar Bear View Post
To answer the current question that Scarf posted, absolutely no.
As you've said, there are assumtions made immediately. Later if they actually care or the subject comes up, sure. I'll tell them.

It's just not important to who I am as a person. :/
I hate +1ing other posts, but yeah, pretty much this.
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  #343    
Old July 26th, 2011, 04:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
No worries.

And now for something completely different: another discussion topic. Do you want people to know you're _______ when you first meet them?

It's hard for me to exactly keep it a secret because of my appearance, but I'm someone who wouldn't want anyone to know because I have self-esteem issues I think it would be nice to get to know someone without them having preconceptions.
No, it's not really important to me. If it comes up, it comes up. It doesn't matter, though~

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  #344    
Old July 26th, 2011, 05:04 PM
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Hope you don't mind I post here even though I haven't come to this thread in a while.
Of course! You're a member of the club, you're welcome to come and go as you please


Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
And now for something completely different: another discussion topic. Do you want people to know you're _______ when you first meet them?
Because I'm generally what you call 'straight-acting' in real life I don't think it's something that's necessary to divulge at first meeting. Of course the more effeminate guys or the more gender-ambivolent people in general don't have that luxury because it's fairly obvious right off the bat (and there's nothing wrong with that), but since it's not immediately clear I don't see why I should go out of my way to point it out.

I wouldn't go so far as to say "it's not that important to who I am" because I believe human sexuality is incredibly important to the human experience, but it's certainly not the most important thing about who I am. I'd rather they get to know things about me in order of priority.
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  #345    
Old July 26th, 2011, 09:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
No worries.

And now for something completely different: another discussion topic. Do you want people to know you're _______ when you first meet them?

It's hard for me to exactly keep it a secret because of my appearance, but I'm someone who wouldn't want anyone to know because I have self-esteem issues I think it would be nice to get to know someone without them having preconceptions.
I try to be ambiguous about my sexuality. I do not say "hey, Megan Fox is sooo hawt!" Or anything else to appear straight. Nor do I say that I am gay. I guess I try to keep two major things in mind prior to mentioning it to someone.

1) Figure out if they are accepting of gay people
2) I like them to get to know who I am beyond my sexual identity first.

I just don't waste my time with people who say things like, "isn't ridiculous that Elton John is allowed to have kids." Or, "Anne Coulter and Sarah Palin are admirable women that I hope to be like one day." lol, these are actually things that people said a little after meeting them; I decided to not bother trying to hang out with them!
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  #346    
Old July 27th, 2011, 02:28 AM
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As an integral part of my legislative redponse to recent homophobic aytacks on pur students, the AS just passed two important bills.

H.R. 1
Protecting The Right To Bear Arms Act
-Allows concealed and open carry of a basic hand gun on University property if it was obtained legitimately under state and federal law
-Allows for the keeping of basic hand guns and hunting rifles in Univetsity Housing units if they were obtained legitimately under state and federal law
-Requires all firearms to be registeref with University Police, and if applicable, University Housing
-Requires all firearms stored in University Housing units to use trigger safety locks and to be unloaded when not in use for legitimaye self-defense purposes

Also, a bill of mine was passed.

S.B. 3
A funding request by Senator Macias (R-GSA)
-Provides funding to conduct firearms education and safety programs by the Gay-Straight Alliance club with the purpose of educating members about their self-defense rights in order to combat assaults against LGBT students
-Workshops will cover hand guns, tasers, pepper spray, knives, brass knuckles, and defensive hand fighting techniques

Last edited by FreakyLocz14; July 27th, 2011 at 02:34 AM.
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  #347    
Old July 27th, 2011, 04:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
No worries.

And now for something completely different: another discussion topic. Do you want people to know you're _______ when you first meet them?

It's hard for me to exactly keep it a secret because of my appearance, but I'm someone who wouldn't want anyone to know because I have self-esteem issues I think it would be nice to get to know someone without them having preconceptions.
A few years back I used to get asked if I was gay by a large amount of the people I met, and I would deny it, but these days nobody really asks.
Perhaps I've become more ambiguous or people just assume and dont bother asking anymore.
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  #348    
Old July 27th, 2011, 08:08 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FreakyLocz14 View Post
As an integral part of my legislative redponse to recent homophobic aytacks on pur students, the AS just passed two important bills.

H.R. 1
Protecting The Right To Bear Arms Act
-Allows concealed and open carry of a basic hand gun on University property if it was obtained legitimately under state and federal law
-Allows for the keeping of basic hand guns and hunting rifles in Univetsity Housing units if they were obtained legitimately under state and federal law
-Requires all firearms to be registeref with University Police, and if applicable, University Housing
-Requires all firearms stored in University Housing units to use trigger safety locks and to be unloaded when not in use for legitimaye self-defense purposes

Also, a bill of mine was passed.

S.B. 3
A funding request by Senator Macias (R-GSA)
-Provides funding to conduct firearms education and safety programs by the Gay-Straight Alliance club with the purpose of educating members about their self-defense rights in order to combat assaults against LGBT students
-Workshops will cover hand guns, tasers, pepper spray, knives, brass knuckles, and defensive hand fighting techniques
Allowing kids to bring guns on campus!? You guys just opened a huge can of worms; this can only increase the amount of violent incidences at the school.
Why are you guys teaching LGBT kids how to use knives, brass knuckles, and hand guns?!?! These bills are so extreme!

I do not understand why you were so against requiring children to be taught tolerance of gay people and dispel homophobia, yet you want to encourage gay people to just live in a world where there is homophobia and remedy it with more guns and deadly weapons.
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  #349    
Old July 27th, 2011, 08:41 AM
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Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
Allowing kids to bring guns on campus!? You guys just opened a huge can of worms; this can only increase the amount of violent incidences at the school.
Why are you guys teaching LGBT kids how to use knives, brass knuckles, and hand guns?!?! These bills are so extreme!
Freaky is talking about her college campus. It's not a high school or something like that so everyone involved would be an adult (except maybe a rare super-genius kid). Still, I don't like the idea of guns in schools. I'm all for pepper spray though.

Quote:
I do not understand why you were so against requiring children to be taught tolerance of gay people and dispel homophobia, yet you want to encourage gay people to just live in a world where there is homophobia and remedy it with more guns and deadly weapons.
I agree with you on this. I don't see how teaching tolerance for something that's not harmful is bad. Like, I wouldn't be okay if schools wanted to teach acceptance of neo-nazis because they advocate hatred and violence, but acceptance of gay people is more on par with human rights than anything else.
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  #350    
Old July 27th, 2011, 10:23 AM
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yeah, guns are a bit extreme... pepper spray, and maybe even tazers would be okay, but if someone has a gun, and is taught that it's okay to use it, they probably will.

Then again, it is a college, so maybe they'll be able to handle it.
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