Fargona: The Land of Dragons [T][OOC]

[Iceman3317]

Hey, I like the idea of this RP. I got to reread a lot of areas, so it may take me a little to get an SU up. Kinda hope this gets enough people.

However, I do have a small question. I didn't read everything so I may have missed it. On top of using magic can we use swords? Most of the time I like swords over magic, but if we can't, that will be fine. It will give me a chance to work with magic a little more in my writings.

[fortworth96]

@Iceman- You could have a sword if you want, but you'll have magic no matter what. Whether or not you know how to use any spells is up to you. Just, if you're going to have a sword, make sure to choose an occupation that a sword would be used in. So in other words, don't be a farmer o3o

[heretostay123]

I've updated my SU. Tell me what you think so far.

[fortworth96]

Just a few things:

Saying Alexander is a discharged knight doesn't tell me anything about what he's doing right now. Please change it to something else, since if he's discharged that means it's no longer his occupation. He can still be a discharged knight, but that would be something you put in history. Just change it to whatever he's currently doing to make a living.

If you could elaborate on the spells more, please do. You said what they do, but you didn't say how they work. Pretty much, what are the specific effects of the magic.

I'm going to have to ask you to downsize your kirin's length. If you look at the image, kirin have shorter tails like a bovine. And (should probably add this to the first post...) hydra are the only dragons known to live over 200 years, so if you could put it's age down a bit... o3o

Nyeheh, this just made me notice some stuff I should probably edit in the first post to make things more clear... ._.' For anyone who didn't notice, the names of the dragons have links to example images of what a typical dragon of that species looks like.

[heretostay123]

Woops. Haha. I'll fix that right away.

[fortworth96]

This isn't really such a big deal, just a suggestion if you don't want your dragon to look oddly oblong... o3o 6 by 12 just seems a bit disproportionate when I imagine it in my mind XD If it doesn't bug you, then there's no reason to change it really.

[Iceman3317]

Name: Daliden Skyshard

Gender: Male

Age: 25

Appearance: Daliden is about 6' 3" He has black hair with icy blue eyes. His skin is fairly tan for living in the harsh climate that is covered in snow. He is extremely strong for his age. He can cut and pick up massive logs and heavy animal that most of the adults in Skelsaugh have to have others to help. He mainly wears fur armour that he makes and sells from his hunts up in the mountains and near the lake.

Personality: Daliden is very brave is rarely lets anything intimidate him. He has a strong will and when he says he will do something, he will. Although Daliden is strong willed and brave, he can be a really jolly man and can show great respect for his elders. He is also very caring and trustworthy. He has never broken a promise he has made.

History: Daliden and his family have always lived in Skelsaugh. His family survived by hunting and fishing. When he was very young, his family was killed by a gang of thieves that broke into their house and stole everything they had. For reasons unknown, they could not kill Daliden in any way. Later on, he learned how to hunt and was taken in by one of his best friends parents.

Daliden is very skillful when it comes to bows and swords. He never really was great in magic. One day when they were out cutting wood for a fire, a bad blizzard came from no where. An avalanch covered them up and only he survived. He loved his best friend, but never was able to tell her. He has grown away from other people because he thinks that everyone around him will die. However, he is one of the most known hunters in his village and shares his kills with everyone. His vow is to protect anyone and everyone who has become his friend. With that vow, he learned how to use some survival magic to help others.

Occupation: Very good at Tracking, Hunting, and Fishing. Trade and sells furs, hides, and food.
Spells known: Healing Hand Spell: Fairly weak, but comes in handy to heal minor to medium sized wounds with the hands. Aura Shield Spell: Surrounds a person in an aura that is targeted by the spell for five minutes. Can only be used once every hour. Torch Flame: Can quickly make small fires for warmth and also can be used for a very small attack that will only cause minor burns, but can not be used rapidly.

Dragon Species: (Bond will form within the first few posts.)
Drake/Wind
Name: Aleos
Gender: Male
Age: Adult
Description: Aleos is a pure white Wind Drake. His eyes are as blue as ice on a winter day. He has massive legs and a massive tail that can knock down multiple trees in one swipe. He has two horns coming out of the top of his head. His scales reflect the sun when it it out and can be used to blind his enemies. He has multiple spines on his back, but not big enough to cause Dalex not to be able to use him as a mount. He is about 25 feet tall and about 60 feet long. His wings have a little light blue, but it is hard to see from a distance. The wind allows him to go slightly faster when it is blowing. His sattle is made of furs and skin that Dalex had been collecting while hunting.
Personality: Aleos is a calm yet brave drake. He never panics when someone new approaches. He protects those he knows and cares for. He gets along with other dragons as long as they mean no harm. He keeps his guard up while others approach, but most of the time he stays calm. He does not like fighting unless there is no way to avoid it. When he is forced into fighting, he is able to wrap his tail around a tree and use it as a weapon along with his horns, wings and of course his breath attack. He is also very protective of smaller drakes and does not like seeing them get hurt.

RP Sample:

Spoiler:

Dalex took a knee on the stage. There was someone yelling out on the floor in anger, but he ignored it. Yes they were just Pidgey, but there was too many to hold off at once. That is why he had used his combination attack with his pokemon. We better be glad they weren't Pidgeottos or Pidgeots. Dalex thought. He could feel the small Pidgey he had picked up shaking from the yelling. He put a finger on the Pidgey's head.

"Don't worry, they aren't going to attack you." Dalex said to the Pidgey. He once again calmed down, but was still shaking. The girl from the back room he had helped had not come back out yet and he wondered if she was ok even though she seemed ok. He wished he could say the same about his arms though. They burned badly from all the cuts on his arms. Dalex let the Pidgey down and took his bag off his back and pulled out some oran berries and a potion and turned back to the Pidgey. "This will probably sting a little, but it will help." Dalex said to the Pidgey. The Pidgey winced in pain, but then relaxed. "Now eat these oran berries. They will help as well." Dalex said as he laid them next to the Pidgey.

The Pidgey looked up at Dalex and blinked two times. Dalex gave him a slight smile and the Pidgey ate one of the Oran Berries then chirped happily at the taste and ate another. Dalex laughed. He also took one of the Oran Berries and ate it. The Pidgey hopped over to him and looked at Dalex's cut arms.

"Pid...pid." The Pidgey chirped.

"Ah, don't worry, it will be fine." Dalex said.

The pidgey rubbed up against his arms. He winced thinking that it would burn, but the Pidgey was actually fairly soft.

"Well your free to fly. You should be healed enough to fly back to your home." Dalex said.

The Pidgey took off, but fell back down. Dalex caught it in his arms before it hit the ground.

"Guess not, how about you stay with me for now. I'll take you to the woods later on." Dalex said.

"Pid pid!!" The Pidgey cawed and took off again, but this time landed on Dalex's head.

Dalex started laughing and then looked around. He hadn't noticed that there was so many trainers with their pokemon out still. He also noticed all the Pidgey's that were on the ground. He noticed that they were sleeping. He wondered if the girl he had saved earlier that morning was ok. He had encountered so many pokemon who were so angry today, but why? Then it hit him, Suicune had disappeared and most pokemon were becoming angry. Suicune makes all water it touches pure. Is it possible that someone has captured Suicune and put something in the water to make the pokemon act this way? Dalex thought, he also figured he should bring it up later. Because if it is the water, legendary pokemon have to have water too. If they drink some of the water..... the world would be in a great danger.

With that idea, is stomach churned. He didn't want to see his friends or family get hurt. He had to help. He had never liked seeing people get hurt and that is why he defended the girl backstage until she got up and saved the other girl earlier that morning.

[fortworth96]

@Iceman- If you could flesh out Daliden's history and appearance some more, please. History needs to be at least two paragraphs, and I only see one there, and appearance if possible. Like, just how strong is he? Also "a super blizzard" popping up out of nowhere is the only lead I have as to where Daliden's from, if you could include that. Isn't much of a history if he doesn't have a place of origin, hmm? And please try to describe Aleos' appearance (just noticed I put description in place of this in the SU... Fixed this now, but I'm never submitting an RP after midnight again) and personality more. "He is very strong" isn't much for me to go on, as most dragons are very strong. It just seems like you were trying to do the bare minimum for those parts of the SU, and that makes it difficult for me to know what your dragon is like.

Pretty much, just make what you have more detailed, and your history longer, so I have a better idea what Daliden and Aleos are like.

[Iceman3317]

Ok, I will work on that a little later to see what I can add. It may be later before I can fix it though.

[heretostay123]

My mind is made up. This dragon SHALL be disproportionately long. XD

[fortworth96]

@Iceman- A'ight, just tell me once you've made the changes~

@Heretostay- Lol, if that's you want it XD

If all the spots aren't filled up by the time I finish my SU (which I'm purposefully taking a very long time on), I'll post it and remove any extra spots that have not been taken so we can start the RP. Lowering the amount of players won't really affect the plot, though it would be nice to get the seven .w.

[Cutielaurenie]

Name: Jessica Ranger
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Appearance:
Personality (at least one full paragraph. I may ask for more if I'm not satisfied):
History (At least two full paragraphs. I may ask for more if I'm not satisfied. If you've already met your dragon, include how you met it):
Occupation:
Spells known: Jessica can summon a sword or a bow made out of magical energy which lasts for roughly fifthteen minutes. After using the spell, she is severely weakened but can summon another sword in around seven minutes.

Dragon Species: Wingless Amphisbaena
Name: Luphur
Gender: Male
Age: Ancient
Description: Luphur's appearance is of a normal Amphisbaena. His body is as long as 6 feet, which is pretty long. He has thick, dark and brownish scales. His twisted horns are a shining white, like they were just polished. He wears a collar that is engraved with luscious silver that is starting to rust. Luphur has a few scars scattered around because of the past fights he was in, but they are not really seen because of the hue of his scales. Luphur is rarely ridden by his tamer, only if Jessica is in a hurry and she needs to get somewhere extremely quickly. When ridden, he wears a fashionable leather saddle held together with rough straps. He has razor sharp teeth which aren't just for show and tell.
Personality: Luphur is usually sort of in a bad mood but he somehow manages to cope with Jessica's loud blabbing and chattering. Of course when its time to eat he bickers with his other head alot while sometimes arguing with his tamer. Usually though, Luphur is loyal, always listening to Jessica's commands unless she wants him to do something really dangerous. Sometimes he is dishonest and doesn't listen. He tries to open his heart and express his true feelings, but he gets ignored most of the time. When in a battle, Luphur is usually ruthless and over-reacts when attacked. He attempts to not be annoying and in the way of everything.

RP Sample:



Tiny bit more added to my WIP app.

[fortworth96]

Just a few critiques:

Since summoning any kinds of object takes a lot of magic, and dragon tamers don't have much magic as it is, it would take a lot longer than 7 minutes to recover from a summoning spell. For a dragon tamer, it woul be at least an hour before they're able to regain enough magical strength to use the spell again.

Of you want a dragon you can ride, I'd suggest something other than an amphisbaena. With how long Amphisbaena get, they would never be wide enough to be able to seat a rider. Unless they're so fat they can't move XD

[heretostay123]

I've updated my SU, and if all is well all I need will be the history and roleplay example.

[fortworth96]

All looks good to me. I think you just made a typo in you personality. You said they're never seen together XD

[heretostay123]

Oh. Woops...I meant they've never been seen without each other. XD

[fortworth96]

I'm going to be adding a bit more detail to the first post regarding dragon tamers for anyone who doesn't quite understand them, and I also just remembered a couple things I planned on putting in there when I first started planning this RP a few months ago but totally forgot about when I started working on it again... Hopefully it will make things clearer.

[heretostay123]

Excellent. At this rate, my SU will be complete today or tomorrow.

Name: Alexander Baldwin, though he is known throughout the land as the "Knight of the Greenlands" due to his preference of green and his love of the forest.
Gender: Male
Age (at least 16, but no older than 35): 28

Appearance (at least one full paragraph. You may add a picture, but I still want a written description as well): Alexander could be considered a handsome man. His long, chocolate colored, curly hair ends right at his ears all the way around his skull, and hangs in shocks above his piercing blue eyes. His face is fair, much like the elves in the stories he heard as a child. His smile is warm and charming, and his nose is thin and angular He has milky white skin that is impossible to mark upon. He has never had a single blemish in his life. He stands at 6'5, the average size for a knight. His muscles, in his arms, legs, and abdomen are large and powerful from training long and hard in the knight's academy. He has the description of every little girl's fairy-tale knight. He wears heavy plate armor from the knight's academy, and a chainmail suit under it. He wears all-plate helmet that extends from his head to the base of his neck, that he always removes dramatically so he can have an excuse to shake his hair back and forth. He always has his broadsword strapped around his waist in its ornate, green leather sheath. He calls it "Weapon of the Wilderlands." He had master blacksmiths transform his actual armor and sword green, which he wears with pride. His buckler shield is usually slung around his back with the image of a forest emblazoned on the front. He calls it "Warden of the Woods."

Personality: Alexander is a man of action. He almost always charges into a battle without considering it much. Strangely, he's almost never lost with this tactic. He is extremely brave, but he isn't very wise. He believes that things could always be solved with a good sword stroke or a down-right bashing. When in battle he goes into an insatiable blood lust that cannot be quenched until every enemy is dead. He uses his sword-and-shield combination to defeat enemies right and left. This leaves him with no hold of the reigns, but he grips with his knees and trusts Brenton entirely. He loves the dragon with all of his heart, and the dragon loves him back. The pair will almost never seen without the other. He even took up the Kirin way and became a vegetarian for Brenton. He is rather flirtatious with a women that he falls for, and he almost always wins her over with his charm and good looks. He is curious like Brenton, but he will never go investigate something without him.

History (At least two full paragraphs. I may ask for more if I'm not satisfied. If you've already met your dragon, include how you met it): Alexander Baldwin: A man of diverse history. He was born in Ardynn, the boy of a dragon rider. His father was a member of a special battalion known as the Draconics. They were a special group of dragon riders that the king appointed himself. They were
good riders, but they didn't have the natural talent of a tamer. The Baldwin males have been good at dragon riding for centuries, so Alexander's father had him introduced to the lizards at a young age. He took to them quickly, and tended to play around with the hatchlings all day long.

The biggest heart break he ever had was when his father made him leave Ardynn, at age 10, for Banorless so he could serve the king as a knight, which he reluctantly did. There were no dragons at the place so he felt lost. After four years he took up a broadsword, shield, and armor for his country. He had graduated. He was placed in a unit with seven other knights, and the king sent them to the northern sector of the kingdom. For a period of time, it was lazy, but after a year while they were stationed in Skelslaugh, a bandit raid occured. They nearly succeeded but Alexander stopped them by leading two of his comrades in a pincer move. The other two ended up falling to the leader's axe, but Alexander slew him in return. He returned to his brothers with a long face, but he expected praise. Instead, however, he recieved hatred. They blamed him for the loss of their friends. They told this to the local commander, and he had him discharged for acts of treason.

When he left the city, he traveled into the forest to see what he could find. After a few week of wandering he stumbled across a forest Kirin. The elusive dragon approached him...almost like he knew Alexander. He came within an arm's distance and Alexander reached out to touch it. As soon as he did, he realize that he was meant to be with this dragon. There was no other excuse. He fed the dragon and it soon began following him around. After a while, he let Alexander ride him. It felt natural. Brenton was an extension of him, but with four legs. He had a saddle custom made for Brenton, and he had it dyed green. He even had his armor and blade dyed green, and he had a forest painted on the front of his buckler. He became know as the "Knight of the Greenlands." He became a widely-know figure, one who defends the forest from all harm. For an entire year now, he has defended the woods.


Occupation (how do you make a living? This could range from being a thief to being a rich nobleman.): He's a discharged knight that took up the life of a Dragon-Rider mercenary.


Spells known (include a description of how the spells work and what they do. Remember, nothing too powerful. If your character doesn't know any spells, leave this blank):
Unlocking doors: His fingers release small tendrils of magic that drift into a lock mechanism and tease the bolt until it unlocks
Simple wound healing: He places his hand on a wound and magic flows into his palm. It than heals no more than a bruise.
Some-what powerful night vision: He channels magic to his eyes and he gains a bit of night-vision.
Restores a little bit of energy: He can use his magic to replenish energy


Dragon Species: Forest Kirin

Name: Brenton


Gender: Male


Age (adolescent, adult, or ancient): Ancient


Description (at least one full paragraph. You may add a picture, but I still want a written description): Brenton is a large dragon. He is roughly 12 feet long and 6 feet high. His scales are the exact same color as a tree's bark, and his eyes are the exact same color as Alexander's: A piercing blue color. His horn is long, but his "branches" add a good three or four feet to his height, since he is roughly 100 years old, and he is undefeated in stamping competitions. His tail makes up for about 1 foot of his original length. His back is burdened with a saddle that was custom made for him when Alexander became his rider. He bears it with pride, for it shows that he has a rider. He belongs to someone. He lacks wings, but what he lacks in flight, he makes up for in speed. His legs are powerful from a decade of being Alexander's battle steed.


Personality (at least one full paragraph. I may ask for more if I'm not satisfied): Brenton is a calm creature outside of battle, but when he enters it, no one save for Alexander is safe. He kicks out with his feet, gores with his horns, and destroys with his earthquakes. When his fighting is combined with his rider's they are practically invincible. He is very curious at times, which has led to many an incident, but when Alexander is at the reigns he is rearing to go. He gets along well with other dragons, but he prefers to be alone, or with Alexander. The two are nearly inseparable.

RP Sample (I don't care if it's a post from another RP, or a one you've just written up. Just as long as it's good):

Spoiler:

Bakura Jinguar: A Strange Occurance

Spoiler:

I was just doin' my thing, buyin' some fries, eatin' some burgers. The usual. I was having a jolly old time...Damned digimon and their screwing up my life. I was just trying to eat my damned hamburger. Grah! I'm so damn mad! Anyways, where was I? Ah, yes.

I was running throughout the street without a care in the world....except I was hungry. Always hungry. Friggin' stomach and its smallness. I wish I could punch it in the stomach....wait...I'd be punching myself in the stomach. Damn logic....Well, I downed a large fry in moments and I scarfed down a hamburger. Best hamburger I ever had, Five Guys. I friggin' love their food. It's amazing.

These friggin' cars kept coming at me. They were running from the corrupt Digimon. Who wouldn't these days? They were terrifying. A good question would be why I'M not running away from them. They had seperated me from my parents earlier. It wasn't like I missed them. Tch. What kind of sappy little woose do you take me for? They were good parents and all, but I feel like they smother me. It's really irritating, ya know?

I dodged this car and kept running, only to be knocked aside by the next one. I stood up to come face-to-face with a...red...[COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]dinosaur[/COLOR][/COLOR]? "What. The. Hell. Are. You?" I asked the creature with a pause between each word.

The dinosaur replied. "I-I'm Guilmon. My friends called me Gil..." He seemed a little quiet. "Wh-who are you?" He was nervous. I could tell.

"I'm Bakura. Come with me. The Corrupts are coming!" Bakura had started to give the corrupt Digimon their own title: The Corrupts. Guilmon nodded, and Bakura took off with Guilmon right behind him. "I don't suppose you're a corrupt, so we're cool." Guilmon just nodded and followed behind. They rounded the corner of the next block to come across a horde of corrupts. "Damn. This blows."

[Iceman3317]

I have added some more info in the areas you have asked me to. I may add more later on and I am thinking about changing the age.

[fortworth96]

@Iceman- Daliden's part of the SU is fine, but you didn't fix Aleos' part at all from what I can tell.

[Iceman3317]

Ok, I think that about gets it. Can always add more if needed.

One more question, what is the wildlife like? Are we dealing with other mythical monsters and are there any mammoths or saber-tooths?

[fortworth96]

@Iceman- Alright, you're accepted~ Just make sure with the tree thing, Aleos doesn't go ripping trees twice his size out of the ground XD

The wildlife isn't anything special. The only fantasy creatures in this RP are dragons, and really they make up at least half of the wildlife on the mainland, more than that if you count the ones living in the oceans. Otherwise, it's just the usual deer, rabbits, wolves, etc. If it would make things easier, I can add something about it to the first post.

[Iceman3317]

Ok. Was just making sure there was no mammoths or anything like that. I needed to know for my first one or two posts. And lol don't worry, when I said uses trees as weapons, that was the first thing thing came to mind that I needed to make clear he wasn't gonna use giant trees.

I am also going to probably change my age to a bit older, so I am not much younger than the rest.

[Typh]

sounds interesting, can you please reserve me?

[fortworth96]

@Typh- Sure thing~ I'll add your reservation to the first post once I get home.