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Monkey Crotch [Pakistan's list of banned words]

Posted November 19th, 2011 at 7:06 AM by Esper

Pakistan, wonderfully repressive Pakistan, is one of those places in the world where they censor the internet, but now they're planning to censor texts as well.

Their government came up with some 1,000+ English words (and a lot of Urdu words) which would be censored. Many of the words are the kinds you would expect to see on such a list (you know, the kind that get censored here at PC, too), and some of them are not explicit, but you can still see why they'd be censored. And then there are some real gems.

Here are a few of the words you won't be able to text in Pakistan in the near future:

sex
sexy
gay
queer
butt
intercourse
condom
breast
period
tampon
deposit
fondle
flatulence
fairy
lolita
boody
barf
fart
love juice
mary jane
strap-on
pocket pool
quickie
back door
manpaste
love pistol
gonorrehea (spelled wrong)
headlights
purina princess
wuutang
got jesus
kmart
monkey crotch

I would include the full list of banned words, but obviously that would be a bad idea here.

EVERYBODY USE THESE WORDS WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    PlatinumDude's Avatar
    I don't see anything wrong with using fairy or deposit. Why would they be on the list?
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 7:15 AM by PlatinumDude PlatinumDude is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Esper's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by PlatinumDude View Comment
    I don't see anything wrong with using fairy or deposit. Why would they be on the list?
    Fairy is a word that's sometimes used for gay men. Deposit, well, you just have to use your imagination for that one.
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 7:34 AM by Esper Esper is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Oryx's Avatar
    My headlights were on when I went to kmart to deposit money on the love pistol I had on layaway. They wouldn't take my money though, so I farted and bought a fairy costume instead.

    ...got jesus?
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 7:50 AM by Oryx Oryx is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Mew~'s Avatar
    So they aren't allowed to fart there?
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 8:50 AM by Mew~ Mew~ is offline
    Updated November 19th, 2011 at 9:36 AM by Mew~
  5. Old Comment
    Mr Cat Dog's Avatar
    Lolita is the one that makes me laugh the most. Oh Pakistan...
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 10:51 AM by Mr Cat Dog Mr Cat Dog is offline
  6. Old Comment
    Vrai's Avatar
    flatulence

    boody
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 11:40 AM by Vrai Vrai is offline
  7. Old Comment
    Kura's Avatar
    I saw this the other day.. very peculiar that they chose those words.
    Posted November 19th, 2011 at 11:58 AM by Kura Kura is offline
  8. Old Comment
    Sydian's Avatar
    great i was JUST AT kmart the other day
    Posted November 20th, 2011 at 4:43 PM by Sydian Sydian is offline
  9. Old Comment
    Spinor's Avatar
    "Doctor, I have _Gonorrhea_!"
    "Your word was censored. Can you describe the symptoms?"
    "_______________________________________"
    "Well, that sure didn't work"

    It's times like this wh3n th3 w0nd3rful 1nt3rn3t 1nv3nt10n 0f 1337 1s us3fu1 4 0nc3
    Posted November 20th, 2011 at 5:31 PM by Spinor Spinor is offline
  10. Old Comment
    How often does someone say "monkey crotch"? I live in a country that predominantly speaks English, and there are a few there that are new to me. If you can't say "k-mart", can you say "wal-mart"?
    Posted November 21st, 2011 at 11:07 AM by CookieCookie CookieCookie is offline