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Alright to dislike someone cordial with you?

derozio

[b][color=red][font=helvetica][i]door-kun best boi
5,521
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14
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..guess it should be titled "Is it alright to REALLY dislike someone like that?"

Well, there are some people here who've been cordial with me, to say the least. They've said nothing wrong or offensive. Never have done anything to irritate me personally. But, from their posts and general interactions with other members over the forum, their attitude in general just doesn't sit right with me. And that..just irritates me.

I feel that the user just sucks up to staff for some reason and tries way too hard to get their attention. Not to mention, they come off as a little too obsessed with themselves and their so called 'popularity' over an internet forum. You know..I've never felt irritated at someone I hardly knew and this is just weird. I mean, I think I'm a relatively decent guy with a decent level of tolerance but it doesn't help that these people are generally always online and every time you think they ought to be given a chance, you stumble across those face-palm worthy posts of theirs or one of those "Hey mod, I don't like this user who posts in this section. Their posts just piss me off because they neglected some rules" at a mod's profile. Why do you have to write it on a mod's profile? I mean, just report it and be done with it, alright? This looks especially silly when the other person concerned apparently doesn't give a flying **** about the VM. So why don't you guys just stop? What you people do doesn't make you popular nor does it make you a contender for a future staff member. Just behave as a normal member does, stop with all the drama queen act and go on loving the section you love and you'll probably get what your heart desires, alright? Alright? Might earn you some really good friends along the way, too. People who actually DO consider you a true friend.

..well, I think I've ranted on enough. I don't really wish to offend people. But I know I will. Just wanted to get it off my chest. Sorry about that.


Edit. I've realized most of the stuff I spouted over here is A level bull. Disliking someone is alright, I guess, but on looking back at this post, I think I went overboard with the insults. A little too much. And I'm really ashamed of myself for that.
 

Riku

Who cares to know, eh Bubbles?
419
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13
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  • Age 31
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I feel the same way, to be honest, but I've just learned to deal with it and accept that with certain people, I don't believe they truly realize what they're doing, so yeh. Don't feel bad, Dero. You're not alone-- just try not to take it so personally.
 

derozio

[b][color=red][font=helvetica][i]door-kun best boi
5,521
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14
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Well, nice to see I'm not the only one who is bothered by their attitude..

And naah, I don't really take it personally. They bothered me a bit and I wanted some of them to read what I thought of them. Might affect them a bit, you know? It'll be good for the both of us if they understood what I was talking about.
 
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Her

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this entire post is one massive sly dig and i am not comfortable with that
 

derozio

[b][color=red][font=helvetica][i]door-kun best boi
5,521
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Well, what can I say? I guess I could've worded it a little better. But that doesn't change the fact that what I've written over here is exactly how I feel about those people. I wrote what I felt like.

If you're not comfortable with it..too bad.
 

Kura

twitter.com/puccarts
10,994
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I think it's fine.. I mean, you can't force yourself to like someone.
But if you're treating them unfairly, or gossiping about them, or generally gonna say something bad about them/ have malicious intent, then that's a different story :/
 

derozio

[b][color=red][font=helvetica][i]door-kun best boi
5,521
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Naah, nothing like that. I don't interact with them. Neither do I mention them when I talk to others. In fact, this blog post is the first time I'm taking a "sly dig" at them. For me, they're just..there. I know better than to insult someone or ***** behind the back. I know how it turns out in the end. So yeah.
 

Guest

Guest
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You're entitled to like and dislike whoever you may want to (not that you consciously want to dislike someone). To me, those reasons don't really seem like legitimate reasons for you to dislike someone, but you really don't need any legitimate reasons for you to dislike anybody. Be extremely irritated by them and what they do, maybe, but outright dislike them?
 

Her

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Derozio;bt82011 said:
I know better than to insult someone or ***** behind the back. I know how it turns out in the end. So yeah.
that's interesting, considering that even though you are not mentioning this person by name, talking about them behind their back is exactly what you are doing
 
10,769
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I get that stuff and people can bother you. I get wanting to vent about it. I don't know if it's really helpful to vent in public about it though. I mean, you said it: "If you're not comfortable with it..too bad." If these people bothering you aren't really affecting you maybe just let it go?
 

derozio

[b][color=red][font=helvetica][i]door-kun best boi
5,521
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14
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Patchisou Yutohru said:
You're entitled to like and dislike whoever you may want to (not that you consciously want to dislike someone). To me, those reasons don't really seem like legitimate reasons for you to dislike someone, but you really don't need any legitimate reasons for you to dislike anybody. Be extremely irritated by them and what they do, maybe, but outright dislike them?

Well, their attitude gets on my nerves at times. And, like I said, the fact that they are almost always online and present everywhere doesn't help. Their posts are always there to stare you in the face. I mean, I didn't harbor hatred for them long ago; but it is irritating to constantly come across stuff that they do. And I can't help but dislike a person who irritates me on a constant basis. :(

Harlequin said:
that's interesting, considering that even though you are not mentioning this person by name, talking about them behind their back is exactly what you are doing
What's interesting is that you're saying this on a public blog. It can be seen by everybody. And I wanted it to be like that. Maybe you missed this part?

Derozio said:
They bothered me a bit and I wanted some of them to read what I thought of them.

And I checked. They were here. At least they read it? Mission successful, if that's true.

Scarf said:
I get that stuff and people can bother you. I get wanting to vent about it. I don't know if it's really helpful to vent in public about it though. I mean, you said it: "If you're not comfortable with it..too bad." If these people bothering you aren't really affecting you maybe just let it go?
Well, I realize venting in public won't help my cause...but, you know, I kinda wished that with this blog, I might be able get a message across to those people - What you do is irritating. It'll be good if you stop. If you don't..well, it is out of my hand, I guess. But I just wanted to let you know that there are people out there who do not appreciate your attitude. You know, secretly wishing they'd change a bit, maybe?

But yeah, this'll be the last time I talk about them. I only wanted them to know about it. And wanted to know if it really is normal to dislike people based on their behavior in public. This entry has served its purpose.
 

Nihilego

[color=#95b4d4]ユービーゼロイチ パラサイト[/color]
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We can't like everyone we bump into. I find that a lot of the time I dislike someone for reasons I don't even understand, since they've done nothing wrong to me, and I guess it's just because they remind me of someone previously I didn't like or whatever. And I get that we definitely do want to vent about it sometimes... but this was really not the right way to do it. If your intention was to tell these people about your problem with them then it's best you just tell them directly. I don't think anyone who posts enough to grind on you like this sees the same issues that you see in their posts, so they'll read this and assume you're thinking of someone else. I don't think your point will get through to them this way.

Whether or not this has got through to them in any case, you don't publicly complain about other members. This whole thing is potentially pretty disrespectful, even if it's not naming anyone. You're not the only person who feels this way; trust me here, I've had this discussion with others about these sort of people several times before, so honestly you could have kept this between you and a friend or otherwise. You didn't have to, and shouldn't have, publicly made members who aren't even the target of this blog doubt their own posting style. Because I'm certain that some people are going to, and may well have already, taken this the wrong way. No-one is psychic. No-one can tell who this blog was really aimed at. So honestly I... doubt it's served its purpose at all. As I said, keep it to yourself and maybe someone else to rant to, or take it to the people it's intended for. I just think this was a pretty unnecessary and frankly reckless entry, that's all. :/

For the record, I'm not saying that there's anything at all wrong with disliking someone. I already said that you can't like everyone. But when you do dislike someone, yeah, public isn't the way to go.
 
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Oryx

CoquettishCat
13,184
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You can't help disliking people. It's not a facet of our lives that we can control. What we can control, however, is our reaction to it. If we acknowledge that it's part of our own bias and the person has done nothing morally wrong or rude or something that deserves dislike, we have the ability to keep that dislike to ourselves as mature people.

It's not mature to make a blog like this, trying to change people that aren't doing anything wrong through shaming them publicly. I was totally behind the blog's idea of critically examining why you dislike someone and whether or not it's valid, but making it into a "lesson" for these people that you dislike is really rude and honestly arrogant on your part, assuming that your method of social interaction is the only appropriate way to approach life.

If you dislike someone for a bad reason, the solution isn't to shame them into changing, it's to work towards not acting on that unfounded dislike.
 

Sydian

fake your death.
33,379
Posts
16
Years
I have an idea of who you dislike, and I'm sure if you walked a mile in their shoes, you would see why they're the way they are.

Needless to say, I dislike this blog. I think it's rude and we know who you're talking about. It's not cute, it's not clever. Why would you complain about a member in a place like this where they will likely see it and hurt their feelings? It's fine to dislike someone. I'm not saying you have to like them, but seriously, you can't find somewhere else to rant about them, instead of somewhere right in front of their face? That's classless.
 
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