It's Hard To Wake Up In The Mornings.

It really is. Right now I don't feel like going to sleep. But honestly, it's just so hard to wake up in the mornings. I felt like writing a blog - finally making one... Here... Maybe that'll get me less depressed. Sometimes when I'm home, I don't want to go anywhere, I don't want to get out of bed. Yesterday I took a bath - didn't bother to wash my hair. Just got out of the bath, was so achy and tired I just moved from the bath to my mom's bed. Didn't even bother to put on clothes.

So what does that mean? I slept in her bed. Naked.

I've never felt... That bad. I mean, I've felt bad before. But never - that bad. God. I don't know what to do. I'm taking extra therapy now, but my mom really doesn't have any faith in my future. When I talk about what I wanna do or what I have plans for she just tunes me out and says 'let's talk about today'. There's a packet of work that she wants me to do, and apparently I only have one semester left of work until I get my Special Diploma (which is like a GED...), but I don't want a Special Diploma. I wan't to work on my health, be healthy enough to go back to school and get a Regular Diploma.

So that way- people will hire me. I can get a good job, and move out But mom's so damn clingy! Sigh. I don't mean to rant. But talking about it really helps. This is why I made this blog? Yall can talk about your problems too. But anyway, I don't want to do the packet. My plan is to get my surgery - a vascular surgery which is supposed to re-connect my arteries to help my blood flow (though we've suspected it might not do anything at all, which really scares me), get a therapy dog, and use my wheelchair to help me move around in school better. I might need a wheelchair + therapy dog to help me be independent, but whatever keeps me out of the house and on my own, really.

I don't want to prove my mom right. I'm not doing this for her. And all of you who are like me - struggling to wake up in the mornings - even on week-days and struggling to brush their teeth, this is the place to talk... I wanna hear your struggles to. Because honestly my mom thinks I'm the only person in the world who is like this ; P and it's getting really freaking annoying. So come, talk to me brothers (and sisters).

When you said "special diploma", that really got me to do some google searching and to get a few questions answered. I see why students with disabilities have the opportunity to get a diploma whether they passed their courses or not. Your mom has a good reason to be the clingiest person she is, but it's a legit reason.

I'd say stick with your current graduation track first, and then right afterwards, attend an adult school or a school that offers high school diploma classes where you can challenge yourself to finish the courses. Depending on where you live and all, some community colleges are very finnicky when it comes to accepting students with certain diplomas. The one I used to attend only accept HSDs and nothing else.