2012 brings new things to discover as well as uncertainty about the future. It also brings more of that 2012 doomsday BS that has been running rampant the past few years, despite common sense and scientists actually proving that the predicted Mayan doomsday will not happen! But that still doesn't stop idiots like Discovery Channel, History Channel, Patrick Geryl and other morons from continuing to shove their doomsday shows and books down our throats!

Since the world will end in 356 days from now (we are in a leap year, so we have the 29th of February), I've decided to have my own fun with this "phenomenon". Don't worry, I'm not going to talk about how the earth will suddenly reverse its magnetic fields or anything like that. I lack the intelligence to make sense of that stuff.

The reason for this title if I'm not going to talk about 2012? A certain 80's song that critics think is probably the worst song in history.
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Stuff from Top Gear that I really want to do!

Posted December 12th, 2009 at 12:36 PM by Mario The World Champion

I enjoy watching Top Gear on BBC America a lot. Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May and the Stig provide an endless supply of amusement as they fool around with really fast cars. Whether they race against a dude trying to cross a mud filled river or sending a Mini Cooper with rockets down a ski jump, it's all funny stuff.

So after watching a bunch of episodes in which the guys do some really wacky stuff, there are a few of them I'd really like to attempt to try in no particular order.

1. Steal a tractor, get a whole bunch of rapeseed and grow my own biofuel. After harvesting the crops, I realize that I made 500 gallons of biodiesel because I picked out the wrong type of seeds beforehand.

2. To get rid of the biodiesel, I get some idiots and enter a 24-hour endurance race with a modified sports car so it can run on the biodiesel. Then we find out it's a professional endurance race against top teams.

3. Me and a bunch of other dudes race each other in city buses with the intent on wrecking the crap out of each other.

4. I invite a bunch of Touring Car drivers and race them in motorhomes, only to have them destroyed by race's end because I invited British Touring Car Drivers, the roughest racing drivers in the world.

5. Do a bunch of epic races whre I drive the hottest sports cars against my buddies who take everything from a train, a boat, a plane and other means of transportation to a lot of cool area around the world.

6. Destroy a lot of caravans, including setting one on fire during a caravan holiday.

7. Make a Toyota pickup truck into a boat and sail across a big body of water.

8. Take another Toyota Pickup truck and abuse the hell out of it to the point where it's totally destroyed, but still running.

9. Use a top of the line Chevrolet Corvette engine and harness its power into making a blender from hell.

10. Get an Opel Kadett and name it "Oliver".
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    Posted December 12th, 2009 at 12:55 PM by I Laugh at your Misfortune! I Laugh at your Misfortune! is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Misheard Whisper's Avatar
    @ 3: I saw that episode - it was hilarious.

    And you forgot stripping down a car so that it's little more than a shell and an engine and driving across a desert in it at high speeds.
    Posted December 12th, 2009 at 1:29 PM by Misheard Whisper Misheard Whisper is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty's Avatar
    This entire post is just made of epic win. Especially #8 - that entire episode had me in stitches. INDESTRUCTIBLE TOYOTA FTW. x3

    Myself, I'd just want to go joy-riding with James May. <333
    Posted December 12th, 2009 at 3:03 PM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Mario The World Champion's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Moriarty View Comment
    This entire post is just made of epic win. Especially #8 - that entire episode had me in stitches. INDESTRUCTIBLE TOYOTA FTW. x3

    Myself, I'd just want to go joy-riding with James May. <333
    You mean hop in his Fiat Panda and get lost in some other country.

    I'd rather stalk The Stig if I had the chance.
    Posted December 13th, 2009 at 3:19 AM by Mario The World Champion Mario The World Champion is offline