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Let's Play Pokemon Snakewood! Chapter 25

Posted December 15th, 2018 at 9:25 AM by Rainbow Chara X
Tags lp#1

This was the final update of 2015 when I first put it up, so wow I feel old.

Chapter 25 - Jack and the Mirror of Fate



Last time on Snakewood, we got knocked out by a Battle Zombie and were suddenly rescued back to Pacifidlog Town.

What does the game have in store for us now?

: "Uhh... what happened?'

Dr. Blackthorn: "From what I can surmise, Gleis must have put you into a trance and transported you to Senex's lair. As soon as I had heard what happened, I rushed to get you back here."

: "Oh yeah, I was beaten up by a Battle Zombie..."

Dr. Blackthorn: "Yes. Now, I realize you must have believed yourself strong enough to brave Senex's fortress. This is is simply not the case, as you can see from how easily Gleis subdued you. Your Pokemon are powerful, but you yourself are still vulnerable."

(whispers): ("Damn straight we're powerful!")

Wow, the game actually acknowledged that Jack is still just a regular human being (who is apparently psychic, given how he can freely talk to the Crew). He's a good team leader, but can't do anything without The Crew at his side.

: "That's true... What am I to do then, Doc?"

Dr. Blackthorn: "You must learn how to defend yourself without Pokemon - and to do that, you must learn from a master. That is why we are here. The Gym Leader for this town, Esau, is such a master. His powers makes the Sages in the mountains seem like mere children."

^ My exact thoughts

Dr. Blackthorn: "Yes. Now, Jack, go forth and seek out Esau. He will teach you everything you need to know. I must leave now, for Senex is launching an attack on Fort Draco, and my help is needed, but do not give up!"

At the very least he's not making us do it.

[The Professor flies away on an unknown Pokemon]

Alright, then. We have a ton of things to do now that this has opened up, but let's just talk around for a bit.

"This town is so drenched with salt water that no zombies can even come close. We're totally safe!"

You know, except for the two swimming zombies that managed to guard the Lilycove Sewers that one time. If they get here, nobody would be safe then.

"Grr... No one believes me.. I saw the old man fly overhead, trailing shadows in his wake..."

[Imagines Senex flying through the air, Superman style, with a bored look on his face]

The other two people in the house talk about Senex too, which will be relevant in a bit considering their text used to be about Rayquaza.

"Want to hear about his amazing life story?"

: "... Sure."

"Listen up: A few years ago, Birch went on three hazardous expeditions to uncharted territory - the Ivy Ruins, the Muddy Tomb, and the Heated Cave. There, he found three never-before-described Pokemon, and brought them safely back to Pallet! Of course, he gave two of them to deserving young trainers, but that last one is part of his most famous research project."

Basically, Birch went to the caves where the Regis used to be and found the starters. I'd say something more about this, but to be totally honest I'm not sure if the way to activate the Regi Sidequest is the same as it is in the normal game.

There was also this dude who gave us Return because Jack and the Crew love each other.

She's giving us a Chikuwa because she wants to give some treats to Esau. Awwww.

... Okay, crazy lady you do your thing

"I was hoping to set up a branch of my company in this region, but it doesn't seem like a viable proposition right now. These were the product I'd be selling, but never mind. You may take them."

But good sir, I don't require a watc--

Oh, he gave us rollerblades...

"Those Air Treks will allow you perform tricks, such as spinning or crossing over rails."

Translation: "The Air Treks is Snakewood's answer to the Acro Bike."

Let's try 'em out.


: "Jack, put on a helmet!!"

[Jack skates up and down the path]

Jack is now the raddest kid on the block. Now watch his dumb ass fall face-first into a garbage can.

Seriously though, they're just white shoes that make you run on command. But damn it if it's not charming.

Okay, enough messing around. It's time to talk to Esau and get the training montage over with.

In-Universe explanation: "Reggie trained a lot offscreen"

Out of Universe explanation: "An dump truck's worth of rare candies were shoved down his throat"

Yes, the OG Parasect returns for this gym and we're going to need him.

This gym is full of monks. It's pretty obvious that these guys are few grades above the monks from the Monastery.

"Yo! This here's Esau's Gym! He and his disciples are masters of Spiral Energy, The Force, and every mystic power in existence! You're gonna need Mindforce to beat him!"

So they know the Force from Star Wars, the Spiral Energy from Gurren Lagann and possibly even more than that? Well muk, we're in for some trouble today.

You can't really challenge Esau without fighting all of these dudes, but I couldn't leave this guy out regardless considering he has a new Pokemon.

... Who has Tohru's name apparently. This is gonna be a bit confusing, isn't it?

Sage Tohru has a Claydol here that's a bit more dangerous than we're used to, thanks to knowing Explosion and being level 70. What the hell is with the difficulty now? Please, someone explain.

Guess what though?

It's very easy to trick his A.I. Thanks for the EXP, chumbo.

What the hell is a Vig--

That's... a bit unsettling.

Vigourlan here is the evolution of Vigoroth if evolved with "high personality value", even though I don't see Vigoroth evolving into this thing at all. It's AB HORSE MAN to me.

It is a / type that, by virtue of its type, is incredibly difficult to kill with my team. I hate this guy for the same reason as Ramshaker, but Vigourlan is faster and hits a bit harder so he's definitely worse right now.

Being Level 70(!!) does not help in the slightest.

Thanks to a massive stall war, I finally manage to take Vigourlan out with Reggie. Best part about this? Esau's Vigourlan is actually two levels lower than this guy's, which means that he's more annoying to deal with than the gym leader's. That's pretty sad.

Medicham isn't really that bad, but he can pack a wallop if you let him get an attack off. So uh... poison him to make him stop.

(out of context that sounds horrible)

"What matters is your fighting spirit!"

... bullmuk, grandpa!

Seriously though, that's complete balderdash. Type match-ups are practically everything in Pokemon aside from movesets. You don't see someone like Jeanne fighting / guys, now do you?

... oh wait, she has

He has a Magneton that should have become a Magnezone by now. Just saying, if you're going to be an asshole about the difficulty you may as well go all out.

Despite Exploud being really intimidating, Valor busts his face with only two punches.

You'd think that with a 4x Weakness and having access to Poison Powder that this would end pretty quickly? Well, you'd be wrong, given how Leech Life can only do less than a quarter of his life. Everybody also spams Full Restores like no tomorrow when their Pokemon is in the red at this point of the game, so there's that too.

Reggie tells him to talk to the claw.

Pretty good, wouldn't you say?

no way seriously

Poor Weavile never gets a break.

Oh hey, something actually different.

... Not that it matters, since Ambes charcoals Dodrio with only one Thunderbolt thanks to Electric Honey. The paralyze was from him nudging Ambes.

Bellamine trivializes a Beedrill and that's all that needs to be said about that.

"The point of our existence is to provide entertainment to deities known as Gamers."

And there goes the last defense of the fourth wall, ladies and gentlemen. I hope it doesn't get so bad that I start talking to Jack directly.

It may just be a game, but there's some things it can't really get away with.

Man, it's a good thing that this isn't the Kecleon from the Mystery Dungeon games - otherwise, I'd be royally boned.

That said, though, Kecleon's Color Change makes it the most miserable Pokemon to ever live.

Jeanne and Bellamine had to work together to stop this Whiscash, given how I'm still afraid of / types.

Since Reggie isn't a powerhouse like the rest of the team, he does what he always does best.

That is, lacing the enemy with poison and shanking them with his claws.

"What you percieve as reality and what IS reality are two entirely different things."

Huh. That's actually kind of important considering some people like to reject reality and substitute their own.

Like how I'm doing with this game and its awful plot.

Future Dan: No you're not, though. In hindsight, Snakewood's plot is pretty stupid but it's also kinda fun. Dark Rising 1 got so bad that you actually did have to substitute the plot with your own writing... so you know, don't complain, Past Dan.

The Monks are a cool story element that don't belong in Snakewood, to be completely honest. They contrast so much with the stupid crossover wankery that it's like... what's the point?

Masquerain, despite evolving from a / Pokemon, is /. I almost forgot this and took Jeanne out. Bad idea in hindsight.

[Ambes sighs]

: ("None of these Swellows are as cool as Ace...")

Oh god, I didn't have a plan to fight a Hyperegg. Jeanne, do what you do best!

Oh damn, that actually worked out really well. See, Hypereggs have an insane amount of HP - 255 Base HP and 100 Defense/Special Defense. They are practically living blockades and exist to stall your progress as much as possible.

Jeanne and Bellamine had to bring out their best to get rid of just one, which should tell you a lot of their survivability. To think, I traded Hyperegg out for Celebi... even if Celebi is a lot better looking.

Future Dan: You haven't used her... like at all. Way to go, dude.

"Depending on your Zodiac year, fate may have different things in store."

So is Cutlerine actually well-versed in this stuff or not? It's so inconsistent.

... A... mirror. Apparently Esau is in this mirror, so let's talk to it.

Alright, we actually get a choice. If you say Candyman, nothing happens.

Let's try the vandalism answer instead.

"You try to break the mirror, but your fist curls back around on itself as you swing it and you wind up punching yourself in the face, knocking out a few teeth."

* flinch * Oh god, poor Jack.

: "Damn it! That really st-- hey wait a sec."


* laughs into infinity *

The aptly named "Some Teeth" are the King's Rock item in disguise. You can keep doing this until you have an infinite amount of "Some Teeth", which is just gross.

Let's act like that never happened and go with the right answer.

"Aha! Red Stew! Give me that, I'm famished!"

: "Sell me your birthright first!"

: "Don't think that one hasn't been tried on me before, kid! I'm Esau, and I'm a skilled hunter! There's no way you'll get the better of me, so hand over that stew!"

Yes, this is what you needed the Red Stew for. In case you forgot, the Red Stew was a buyable item from the Chef in Lilycove - it's pretty easy to get, all things considered.

By the way, I'm going to refrain from posting what Esau is a reference to due to it being revealed in the next few chapters.

[Theme I would use for Esau: Gem Guardian]

Apparently they weren't joking when they said he's powerful. The mirror he appears from is really good looking for the sprite quality of this hack.

That said though, if a level 68 Vigourlan is the weakest thing he'll throw at you, you know you're going to have a bad time.

(i have a seething hatred for / Pokemon, can you tell? )

Jeanne works well with anybody, but Bellamine is her best choice. (if you know what i mean σ‿‿σ)

Basculin is... a thing? That's something that really boggles me - Zoroark is called Gigawolf yet all of the other Gen 5 Pokemon (Zebstrika, Bouffalant, Excadrill, etc.) are correctly named. So... you got me?

Ambes just barely managed to tank that Earthquake. Damn it Ambes, you're too fragile to fight against those kinds of guys!

The Basculin, on the other hand, only needed one Thunderbolt to get rid of him. Good thing too, because I'm not sure how I would have dealt with that otherwise.

Almost immediately after the Basculin, Esau throws out a Gyarados in order to scare me. Didn't work, as you can tell.

* high-pitched scream *



Oh my god Ambes, kick this wannabe Hawlucha's ass


... * cough *

Sorry about that. I just have nightmares about those things after what happened back at the Elite Four.

Esau's final Pokemon is a Spiritomb? Neato, but not very hard to kill.

Jeanne, you are still the best of the best.

: ("Naturally.")

Not so hot now, are you?

* is shot with a 50-cal rifle *

Whoa, we actually got a badge out of this. Pretty nice, even though we've already defeated the Elite Four.

[Jack hands over the Red Stew]

:"Um, I know this guy called Dr. Blackthorn, and he said you'd train me to fight the evil necromancer that's threatening Hoenn so I can find my brother?"

: "Yes! That I can do. Meet me at Sundance Rock at midnight."

: "Wait, where's Sunda--"

[Esau vanishes from the mirror]

[The mirror turns completely white]

: "What's the deal?"

[Jack gets closer to the mirror, only to be blinded by a bright flash of light]

: "G-gah!"

[The light clears, with no visible difference]

: "What just happened? Guys, do you feel any different?"

: ("I... don't know, Jack! What was that light about?")

: ("Wait... I'm getting in contact with the team in the boxes. Apparently...")

: ("Their levels were dramatically increased! Some of them have evolved, even! What kind of miracle is this?")

: ("Apparently that light was the cause. I swear I could have seen something inside of it...")

: ("No way!")

: ("What kind of force could power up multiple Pokemon at once?! I'm... not complaining though, because that sounds like it could help us out a lot.")

: ("I'd rather we not stand next to this freaky mirror and just go already.")

This is not an event in the game, this is just something I put in to justify the levels for the rest of the story. Everybody in the box is now super charged mostly because I can't raise so many Pokemon up for end-game legitimately.

Future Dan: Now complete with a cameo of a character we won't properly meet until Dark Rising 2.

: [Gasps in awe of her new form]

Of all the Pokemon that got evolutions, Zagon's is the most noticable.

See, Dragoone is a / type that has a staggering 175 Special Defense! They learn a few moves on level-up such as Outrage, Dig, Fire Pump and so on, but they can't be taught any TMs. Dragoone can only learn HMs as they are designed to be HM slave - the Pokemon.

Despite this, Dragoone is very powerful if utilized correctly. Too bad Ballin' took her spot, I guess.

Alice, are you ready?

: ("W-wow! Yes, of course, nya!") [sniff]

This scene is almost note for note Ambes's evolution only with a pink kitty instead of an electric mouse.

: ("Thank you, Jack. I'm glad you never forgot, nya.")

: "Nobody gets left behind, you know?"

Here's the active team. In hindsight, we're horribly underleveled and this is a terrible idea. Despite this though, watch me beat this game anyway.

I can't believe I forgot to do this back when I was first here.

You'd think we'd see a little action given how Dr. Blackthorn had to leave us alone to help around here, but there's nothing at all. That's a bit lame.

Cool-looking tower, though. However, if you read the sign, it just says it's the Mossdeep Gym.

... Maybe it's a leftover sign that they use to block the path? I don't know.

It is pretty much the Shakyamuni Tower from the Monastery only much shorter. It even has the same music!

Stepping on that tile won't do anything, so we'll just leave it alone.

"It flew away a while ago because of the encroaching evil."

Really? Because I've seen what that Pokemon is and it doesn't have wings.

It's not here now though, so that's a shame.

... Dragon disgu-- is this that actor guy from the Film University? Did he like the dragon costume so much that he wanted to actually be with them?

Oh snap, it's one of the Five Ninja instead. Not that it really matters, considering that I'm going to drop that notch off of the quest list after this update. There's not really a good reward for doing it anyway.

Since you were supposed to come here earlier, this was intended to be threatening. Or maybe it wasn't. I don't know when it comes to Bellamine.

Riiiiight, that you aren't. You totally aren't just saying that because I beat your ass into next year.

You can find wild Psypigs and Vulpix here for... some reason. I'm just saying, if you've gotten this far and you don't have a good team already then you might be kinda screwed.

The tower only has three floors, and the X-tiles don't do anything. So I don't know why they're there aside to mark "that's where you need to go, asshat".

Wow I can't believe I actually got this out before midnight. Next time on Pokemon Snakewood we'll get into some trouble.

Sidequest List:
  • Go to the abandoned ship and get the mystery caller's item
  • Collect all fifty Broken Hearts (8 out of 50)
  • Get Strength to move the boulders
Team setup:

(Bellamine, , Level 60, ) - "A man inside of a mirror and everything else that's happened... I know I shouldn't be bothered, but it's still so bizarre..."
(Ambes, , Level 60, ) - "Okay, I'm getting kind of tired of all the waiting we have to do. Why can't these people just help Jack without doing something crazy?"
(Jeanne, , Level 60, ) - "Alas, Ambes, if it were only that easy..."
(Valor, , Level 62, has Plus Band, /) - "Man, this is bullmuk. Why don't those guys back at the Pokemon League do this instead of us? They're better suited for the job than we'll ever be.
(Ace, , Level 58, has Anadrin Talon, /) - "Well, we beat them, so... I guess we're better? I don't know?"
(Ballin, , level 62, /) - "I know, right? We just can't catch a break, can we?"

Back-up Team:

(Reggie, , Level 61, has Leftovers, /) - "'Eyyyyyy, everybody looks great."
(Zagon, , Level 63, /) - "Whoa... I'm a dragon now! I have no idea how this is physically possible, but it's still so cool!"
(Alice, , level 62, ) - "Nyahahaha! I just knew he'd come back for me!"
(Umbra, , Level 62, ) - "I'm impressed. We seem to have grown a bit stronger from that light... but I'm afraid it still won't be enough for the threat ahead."
(Tohru, , Level 60, /) - "My muscles seem to be a bit more toned than before... Is it the cause of that strange light?"
(Pumbloom, , level 56, ) - "WOOOOW! I CAN'T BELIEVE I EVOLVED!"
(Wagner, , Level 57, /) - "What is this strength filling wings? Have we possibly grown more powerful?"
(Chloris, , level 61, /) - "... Whoa... Is anybody else feeling a bit woozy from that?"
(Beatrice, , Level 50, /) - "Not at all, my dear. In fact, I feel better than I ever have been!"
(Shine, , level 33, ) - "WHOA! Spark, did you feel that?"
(Spark, , level 32, ) - "Yeah, sis! It was pretty wicked."
(Letro, level 50, /) - "OH PLEASE. COMING FROM YOU, THAT'S A LAUGH."
(Juno, , Level 60, /) - "A-A-AAAAAAH! What just happened?! Why am I suddenly a Banette now?!"
(Menti, , level 57, /) - "What's this? I don't feel as bad as before... but that's not saying a lot considering - oh jeez, my ear just fell off."
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