- 107
- Posts
- 8
- Years
- Age 26
- Seen Jan 3, 2018
It really is. Right now I don't feel like going to sleep. But honestly, it's just so hard to wake up in the mornings. I felt like writing a blog - finally making one... Here... Maybe that'll get me less depressed. Sometimes when I'm home, I don't want to go anywhere, I don't want to get out of bed. Yesterday I took a bath - didn't bother to wash my hair. Just got out of the bath, was so achy and tired I just moved from the bath to my mom's bed. Didn't even bother to put on clothes.
So what does that mean? I slept in her bed. Naked.
I've never felt... That bad. I mean, I've felt bad before. But never - that bad. God. I don't know what to do. I'm taking extra therapy now, but my mom really doesn't have any faith in my future. When I talk about what I wanna do or what I have plans for she just tunes me out and says 'let's talk about today'. There's a packet of work that she wants me to do, and apparently I only have one semester left of work until I get my Special Diploma (which is like a GED...), but I don't want a Special Diploma. I wan't to work on my health, be healthy enough to go back to school and get a Regular Diploma.
So that way- people will hire me. I can get a good job, and move out But mom's so damn clingy! Sigh. I don't mean to rant. But talking about it really helps. This is why I made this blog? Yall can talk about your problems too. But anyway, I don't want to do the packet. My plan is to get my surgery - a vascular surgery which is supposed to re-connect my arteries to help my blood flow (though we've suspected it might not do anything at all, which really scares me), get a therapy dog, and use my wheelchair to help me move around in school better. I might need a wheelchair + therapy dog to help me be independent, but whatever keeps me out of the house and on my own, really.
I don't want to prove my mom right. I'm not doing this for her. And all of you who are like me - struggling to wake up in the mornings - even on week-days and struggling to brush their teeth, this is the place to talk... I wanna hear your struggles to. Because honestly my mom thinks I'm the only person in the world who is like this ; P and it's getting really freaking annoying. So come, talk to me brothers (and sisters).
So what does that mean? I slept in her bed. Naked.
I've never felt... That bad. I mean, I've felt bad before. But never - that bad. God. I don't know what to do. I'm taking extra therapy now, but my mom really doesn't have any faith in my future. When I talk about what I wanna do or what I have plans for she just tunes me out and says 'let's talk about today'. There's a packet of work that she wants me to do, and apparently I only have one semester left of work until I get my Special Diploma (which is like a GED...), but I don't want a Special Diploma. I wan't to work on my health, be healthy enough to go back to school and get a Regular Diploma.
So that way- people will hire me. I can get a good job, and move out But mom's so damn clingy! Sigh. I don't mean to rant. But talking about it really helps. This is why I made this blog? Yall can talk about your problems too. But anyway, I don't want to do the packet. My plan is to get my surgery - a vascular surgery which is supposed to re-connect my arteries to help my blood flow (though we've suspected it might not do anything at all, which really scares me), get a therapy dog, and use my wheelchair to help me move around in school better. I might need a wheelchair + therapy dog to help me be independent, but whatever keeps me out of the house and on my own, really.
I don't want to prove my mom right. I'm not doing this for her. And all of you who are like me - struggling to wake up in the mornings - even on week-days and struggling to brush their teeth, this is the place to talk... I wanna hear your struggles to. Because honestly my mom thinks I'm the only person in the world who is like this ; P and it's getting really freaking annoying. So come, talk to me brothers (and sisters).