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Showing Visitor Messages 541 to 555 of 3098
  1. Reiyu
    May 1st, 2011 8:04 PM
    Reiyu
    I can trade and trade back your boldore to help evolve it (-) i had the same prob till a while ago lol!
  2. Larq
    May 1st, 2011 7:36 AM
    Larq
    Kay, I'll have it done sometime today. :D
    Hey, is the Charmander nickname-able, or did you get it from someone else?
  3. bobandbill
    May 1st, 2011 4:27 AM
    bobandbill
    Well there's still the line spacing gap thing you could implement (so e.g.

    Quote:
    Paragraph one.

    Paragraph two!

    Dialogue from someone! More dialogue from the same person on the same line!

    Someone else is now talking so new spacing is used!
    As opposed to what you are doing throughout ie:
    Quote:
    Paragraph one.
    Paragraph two.
    Dialogue for someone.
    Sam person is still talking.
    Different person is speaking now.

    As for the further additions, there's more than just adding in events - for instance:
    Quote:
    "Ok!"
    "Now, Touko. Come over here!"
    The Professor and Touko walked over to the shop.
    "This is the Pokemart! this is where you can buy items for your journey ahead!"
    "Thanks Professor!"
    "No problem Touko, have a safe journey!"
    Sure this shows us more of what actually happens, but what does happen isn't that interesting nor tell us much about the characters or setting. For instance to make this more interesting, detail how she says things (is she patient and happy to tell Touko what a mart is even though arguably a person who is 10 or years older should know what a shop looks like, or maybe tired, or so forth?) and what things and places look like (is this shop big or small? Is there a lot of people shopping, or is it empty save for the shop keepers?). Make the stuff you add in interesting to read about - show rather than tell, as it's more interesting to read when one can visualise what things look like or how they are done. There's more on showing rather than telling in those guides linked to at the bottom of the rules if memory serves btw.
  4. bobandbill
    May 1st, 2011 3:02 AM
    bobandbill
    It's better already. =) I still feel a bit more could be added in however e.g. although you put in more about the professor showing her about, it still feels a bit rushed to me. More examples of additions to consider in say the quote I used below would be to consider how the rest of the crowd also reacted or how they walked off - essentially consider each event in your story and how everyone/thing would react to said event.

    As for the correct way to go with formatting in regards to spacing, there's no need to make a new paragraph for every sentence spoken (ie with Ghetsis' speech in particular), and use a line gape spacing between each actual paragraph. So for instance:
    Quote:
    Everyone, I end my words here today by imploring you to consider the relationship between people and Pokémon... and the correct way to proceed.
    We sincerely appreciate your attention."
    The man and all his minions walked off.
    "Woah, what the hell was that?" Touko was confused.

    would be better as:
    Quote:
    Everyone, I end my words here today by imploring you to consider the relationship between people and Pokémon... and the correct way to proceed. We sincerely appreciate your attention." The man and all his minions walked off.

    "Woah, what the hell was that?" Touko was confused.
    Hope that helps.
  5. Aquacorde
    April 30th, 2011 5:09 PM
    Aquacorde
    Not really. She claims she doesn't know what to do on the forums.
  6. Larq
    April 30th, 2011 12:37 PM
    Larq
    I could do that for you. I'll start on the Oshawott, and we can arrange to trade over your Golett soon.
  7. Larq
    April 30th, 2011 9:52 AM
    Larq
    I have the pre-evolutions, but I'd gladly level/evolve them up for you.
  8. polkop
    April 30th, 2011 8:03 AM
    polkop
    Thanks
  9. polkop
    April 30th, 2011 7:56 AM
    polkop
    Sorry, I've a problem wih my WI-FI.
    All is OK now.
  10. polkop
    April 30th, 2011 7:49 AM
    polkop
    Thanks
    My FC is 4856-6663-4722
    See you on WI-FI.
  11. polkop
    April 30th, 2011 7:36 AM
    polkop
    Do you still need to evolve Boldore?
  12. Eruption
    April 30th, 2011 6:10 AM
    Eruption
    Either way.. :(
  13. Eruption
    April 30th, 2011 6:07 AM
    Eruption
    Oh well.

    Stupid outdated internet security. :(
  14. Eruption
    April 30th, 2011 6:05 AM
    Eruption
    I thought HG/SS would work if you used it with 3DS.

    Are Black & White different?
  15. Eruption
    April 30th, 2011 6:01 AM
    Eruption
    What type of DS are you using?

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  • About RainbowNebula
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