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bobandbill June 10th, 2010 8:10 PM

The Plot Bunny Thread
 
The Plot Bunny Thread



Welcome to the Plot Bunny Thread. This thread is simply to post any story ideas you may have and receive feedback on them, or perhaps help provide feedback to other people’s ideas.



Some things to note before posting:


  • The more detailed the summary of your idea, the better. Simply saying ‘trainer fic where the main character has a broken leg’ provides less information for people to work with as opposed to actually mentioning how, for example, the broken leg will affect the character in the story, how it happened, etc. Of course you needn’t have to go into such detail, particularly if you are unsure you want to reveal so much information about your story, but generally the more the better. This also includes what you are basing your story off (e.g. the anime, or the games, or maybe a specific manga) and things like that.
  • The above is also the case with feedback. Responding ‘I like the idea’ for instance is…nice to know, but not helpful and is spammy (and spam [short pointless annoying messages] is against the forum-wide rules). Rather, mention what you like (or dislike) about the idea, offer advice/suggestions, ask a question if you’re curious about a point… basically, in-depth discussion of ideas is encouraged here, so don’t be shy.
  • Before you post your idea, please check the next post which contains the Plot Bunny Guide. It offers some basic things to consider about your idea before posting and also how to come up with/develop ideas, and may very well be of help to you.
  • Don’t argue and be civil – please don’t ask people to get out of the thread or whatnot because you may not agree with each other, or outright say someone is stupid for having such-and-such an idea, and so forth. If there happens to be flaming going on remember it’s better to report and leave it for a mod/higher up to deal with it, not you.
  • This isn’t restricted to Pokémon fics – any fandom-related (or original story) ideas can be discussed here – note though that one is more likely to get more feedback on Pokémon fics because this IS a Pokémon forum.
  • Please don’t advertise if you decide to go ahead with it and use it in a fic – save that for your signature, as advertising is against the rules.


And with that, post away!

bobandbill June 10th, 2010 8:12 PM

Story Ideas Guide



Got a story idea that you think will take the world forum by storm? Or maybe you are unsure about how much potential it has or indeed if it’d make for an interesting story? Alternatively, you may be unsure how to develop an idea or find inspiration? Whatever the situation, the Guide may or may not have something that will help you. To find out…well, read on!


Why is Plotting important?


Why indeed? Because chances are if you jump into a story blindly, you stand a bigger chance of running out of steam/ideas before you’re done, and the story will add itself to the ever-growing mound of unfinished stories out there. Furthermore, plotting and planning out even the bare bones of the story gives you a better idea of what the story looks like and may help you catch some potential plot holes or problems earlier rather than later. And it tends to be easier to fix it in the planning stage rather than when you’re halfway through your fic realising you’ll have to either change your idea or go back and edit.


How to Come Up with the Plot


The first step in making a story tends to be considering what the story is about – what characters, what happens, and so forth – but the first problem is coming up with those things in the first place, and how to do that. First thing you should probably consider is to not rush your plotting – it applies to writing, and should apply to your plotting. When you think of a detail or event to use, take the time to consider the implications of it. As for finding inspiration or ideas to use - there isn’t any sure-fire way that guarantees a good idea to come about – every person is different. Maybe listening to music helps you think, or going for a quiet walk? Mind-maps or the sort can help to give you a method to see your ideas and organise it out as well.

A good approach to begin with is to go for a top-down approach – that is, start from the big picture (the general story idea itself), and from there work out the smaller details/factors of the story. The problem with trying to start with a small idea or point is that it’s harder to build a small moment or event into something big. However, if you do think up a character or event that interests you but are not sure how to use it – make a note of it! Write it down in a document or notebook and save it for future reference and maybe even use.


The Plotting Itself – Consider the finer details!


After you have the general structure fleshed out, reconsider the smaller details to see if they make sense and how they'll add to the story and work together. So to speak - you've laid down the framework for the metaphorical house which represents the story - now you've got to check out the windows and doors and furniture you put in so you don't end up with the front door sticking out of the roof and the toilet in the kitchen.

For instance, the idea may be ‘Midway through Character X’s adventure through the jungle she encounters a legendary Pokémon Suicune and catches it!’ On the face of it, it seems pretty exciting – jungles, Suicune, trainer has a legendary, stuff’s going to happen.

However, it’s not going to be as simple as that for the reader to take in their stride. How likely is catching a super-rare one/few-of-a-kind Pokémon going to be? Why would Suicune not just run away instead of letting itself get caught? Why did they meet in the first place – fate, chance? How would that affect the rest of the story – how would other characters react to the character having a Suicune? How long would this story be? By considering these things you can build on the idea, flesh it out, as well as figure out for yourself if it’d really make for a good idea or not, and hence a good story.


Overall though there are a lot of points to consider, even if the idea seems simple. Breaking it down into parts:
  • The Genre and Style

Generally, the genre means what is the type/category the story falls under. Figuring out what your story is going to be like and what type of story it is is something better done early on. No point trying to plan a story if you don’t know if it’s a comedy or a tragedy! Consider what genre it would be, and from there decide what features in your story make it that genre, and then write to it.
  • How believable is the story?

This is a rather important point to consider – how believable is the idea going to be for the reader? In other words – how feasible/likely are the events in the story? Generally the more exaggerated and unlikely the events the less believable a story will be – such as say the protagonist finding a Rattata in Kanto is far more likely than a shiny, abandoned Piplup which knows Hyper Beam there.
  • Story length and format

You’d want to figure out as well how the story will be written and how long it may end up being. Is it a one shot, or a full chaptered fic? What point-of-view will it be written from – say 1st (from a character’s perspective) or 3rd (narrator’s?) Maybe it’d be written in a diary format? Whatever the choice it will impact the delivery of the story. Remember however that a story should be as long as it has to be to tell the story.
  • Characters involved?

Basically, consider who will be in the fic. Are they OCs/self-inserts/etc, or canon characters? In the case of the latter appearing also consider how they act in your story and if this is in line with how they act in canon – for having a smoking, swearing, sword-wielding Professor may be an awesome thought, but not if this is what you call Professor Oak – it’ll hurt the aforementioned believability part and just look silly.
  • The finer stuff – Character reactions, consequences, etc

Once you have the general concept down and you are generally satisfied with it, you can work on the finer details. Keep a clear idea of what you’ve thought of so far, and consider how character reactions to events would go, how the events are portrayed and how they affect everything relevant in the story.

KajiVenator June 10th, 2010 10:06 PM

I only wish this thread was up before I joined PC. It would have helped me so much in formulating the way I want to develop my story. But, I've had that planned out for a while now. :(

dempsey June 20th, 2010 9:14 PM

i need advice for my fanfic
 
hey im new to writing fan fics and i need advice on this idea im calling it WWP right now or world war pokemon and i want advice onw hat i should do but right now it takes place 10 years after man left earth and the pokemon got smarter and started making machines but eventully a war for domince over the world started and the story follows a officer in the sinnoh army and it follows him thorugh the war and the attack on snowpoint city but if you have advice ,and i know this is not much right now but please tell me

JX Valentine June 20th, 2010 10:21 PM

Try to hook yourself up with a beta-reader. I'm serious about this one. Your idea sounds pretty cool, but cool ideas can get slaughtered by bad execution (read: bad spelling, grammar, that sort of thing), even if you don't think it matters. (Not saying that you think that. Just saying it for the sake of covering my bases.) Your readers will have an easier time focusing on the story if you make sure your work is clean of errors (so they don't end up spending half the time trying to figure out what you're actually saying).

Betas will also help you out with characterization, plot ideas, and that sort of thing. Like I said, this is an okay plot idea, but it sounds like you haven't come up with too many plot particulars yet. Those are the kinds of things you probably won't figure out until you go and write the story. (For example, you might not figure out Character X's reason for grabbing Literal Plot Device Y until you go to write the scene. A beta-reader is someone who can help you by letting you bounce ideas off them and giving you advice as you write your story. I mean, so can the Writer's Lounge, sure, but this person is usually willing to work closer with you and will probably know your story up until that point.

Beyond that, let's talk about your plot idea itself. While a war story is interesting on the surface, there's a few things you'll want to watch out for:

1. Keep in mind the fact that Pokémon are animals in that world. Some of them are intelligent enough to rival human beings. (Alakazam, I'm looking at you.) If they wanted to build machines by now, chances are, they probably would have. Not only that, but also, even if we ignore the possibility that they're using things like that, it's still the equivalent of saying real-world bears would definitely start inventing advanced machinery if every human being on the face of our version of Earth randomly left. It could, of course, happen (which is what Mystery Dungeon sees on a level and is essentially the entire premise behind Planet of the Apes), but it's something to think about. Why? Because I'm not saying don't have it happen. I'm saying don't have your Pokémon be people in creature costumes. Remember that they probably had to work up to that point, and remember that their technology would be different because it'd take into consideration their natural powers... and, well, body-types. (For example: dogs can't operate guns, so don't have your Growlithe do it.)

2. If you got past that tl;dr bit, keep in mind the nature of humans. Humans are pissants. They'll occupy every single part of the globe if they wanted, and they're the kind of species that aren't easily driven away. Case in point: Australia. Aside from a massive desert occupying most of the continent and an equally massive hole in the ozone layer hovering above it, Australia is home to some of its most poisonous and deadliest flora, fauna, and rocks imaginable. Yet, humankind still decided to colonize it and thrive. If the Australians found out that an island next door is a lot less deadly, they probably wouldn't leave in a giant exodus to that other island. They'd just send a bunch of people to colonize and populate it as well.

In short, the nature of humankind isn't to leave behind what can still be used as hospitable territory. It's to leave it only when they'd die by standing still for five seconds with no protection. And sometimes not even then. (*motions to the research bases in Antarctica*) Likewise for the Pokémon world because we're still talking about humans here. Humans. The species that, in that world, decided it'd be a great idea to send ten-year-olds out into the world to capture mystical beasts in baseball-sized spheres for literally fun and profit. There would have to be something major going on to chase everyone out if they have stable establishments (read: cities, towns) there, and if that happens, chances are, it probably means the rest of the planet is rather uninhabitable, too.

Or, in even shorter terms, if you're going to have a Pokémon-only world, that's fine, but you're going to have to come up with a very good reason why the humans aren't there but the planet isn't a smoldering boulder in space.

3. Pokémon probably wouldn't follow the same habits as mankind. As in, they probably wouldn't know what Sinnoh was, and they probably wouldn't occupy the same human cities. This just folds back into the point about not making Pokémon just humans in animal costumes. Pokémon would need time to develop. Given that humans would probably take their Pokémon wherever they went (unless, of course, you've got a good reason why they're not), we're looking at a bunch of wild Pokémon who have had little to no experience dealing with human beings. They wouldn't, therefore, have much of an understanding of human technology, and no one's going to be explaining to them what they're looking at.

Now, assuming they don't just overrun Snowpoint and destroy it (because that's what nature tends to do with things that aren't maintained by humans), this all just means that they'll developed isolated from human thought. It's like the development of a language. If you don't communicate with each other, you'll end up with different words for the same object. Likewise, Pokémon might break up Sinnoh into different territories, name it differently, group themselves into different kinds of societies (because that's also possible with human beings: civilizations don't necessarily have to live in a city a la New York), all kinds of things.

They might not even establish themselves into the same kinds of territories humans do because not all of them would necessarily behave like humans. (For example, maybe the Bidoof group themselves into nomadic tribes that travel through and don't acknowledge Shinx cities. After all, in the real world, you don't have birds acknowledging that they're living in our territory. As far as they're concerned, they've got no particular borders, so they don't really care. We, meanwhile, don't really wage war against the birds unless we're particularly bored because humans don't really think too much about it. We're different species, so it doesn't really matter to us that these animals' habitats overlap with ours.)


In other words, this is my advice:

1. Get a beta.
2. Don't think of Pokémon as human beings in animal suits. Really think about how they would develop and whatnot.
3. Come up with a really good reason for why there's no humans.
4. Don't be afraid to think about how things work in the real world and compare it to your plot.

And voila. Fic. \o/

Eliminator Jr. June 21st, 2010 2:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JX Valentine (Post 5898775)
Case in point: Australia. Aside from a massive desert occupying most of the continent and an equally massive hole in the ozone layer hovering above it, Australia is home to some of its most poisonous and deadliest flora, fauna, and rocks imaginable.

I can vouch for that, I'm from Australia and we do have some pretty deadly rocks over here XD

As for advice, I'd go with most of what JX Valentine/Valentine/Jax said, go find yourself a beta reader and figure out what you want to do with this idea. Remember to make everything plausible though - how did the Pokémon suddenly get smarter in 10 years after living alongside humans for centuries (or millenia)? Why did the humans suddenly disappear? Alakazam have unmeasurable intelligence (as an IQ of 5000 is basically impossible as it's more like a ranking of your intelligence compared to that of others, not a measure of how intelligent a person is), why haven't they devised a way to create more advanced machinery and enslave everybody else? Why do the Pokémon all want to fight? Why are they only getting smarter now that the humans have left?

Try and answer a whole lot of these questions when you figure out how you're going to write this. That, and take constructive criticism to heart, because you can only get better by listening to what other people have to say.

ChrisTom June 21st, 2010 7:38 AM

Quote:

Keep in mind the fact that Pokémon are animals in that world.
Well hold your horses there JX Valentine. That's your idea of Fanon, and it's not neccesarily true. My idea of the Pokemon World is that it is essentially our World (Earth) but Japan is replaced by the Places we see ingame. Pokemon live in that "Japanish" area AS WELL as Animals. The difference between the two is that Pokemon can freely switch between Human and Animal emotions and have elemental abilities.

But that's my idea of Fanon. Pick whichever one you want! ^_-

Anyways, sounds like a great idea and I think you should go for it. My 2 pieces of advice though:

1. DESCRIBE!! I have seen way too many fanfics who say "I went to the Lab. I got a Pokemon that was yellow and I beat the Gym a day later." You need to explain as many things as possible and describe like crazy or nobody will read for more than 20 seconds.

2. Use good grammar. That's a problem people overlook way too much. Punctuation and spelling are things you need to use or people will either not understand you or think you're dumb.

Anyways, good luck!

With all regards,

-ChrisTom

JX Valentine June 21st, 2010 9:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChrisTom (Post 5899447)
Well hold your horses there JX Valentine. That's your idea of Fanon, and it's not neccesarily true.

Actually, I'd hate to say this, but you're sort of missing the point. I never said that Pokémon replace animals. I said that Pokémon are animals. As in, they're treated as animals: animate creatures that aren't on the same level as humans. Of course, the word implies that I'm saying they're considered to be on the same level as real-world animals (although the Pokédex implies it with its tendency to classify certain Pokémon as animals -- such as Pikachu with its designation as the mouse Pokémon), the point is:

1. I never said that they replace animals. In fact, my idea of the Pokémon world is the same as yours. Because that's irrelevant, I'll just leave it at that.
2. Pokémon are not human in mentality. (This is the point I was trying to make to the OP, as you can see by the rest of my post. Hence why it's bolded here.) As in, they're considered to be animals/non-humans by humans and canon evidence (*motions to the numbers of 'dex entries that describe Pokémon hunting in the wild or making nests here or there, et cetera), and they live like animals in the wild. Not to mention the physiology and behavior's completely different. Ergo, they cannot develop societies that mirror humanity exactly, especially in ten years.

So, no, this isn't a bit of fanon we're talking about. What I was trying to say is that the OP shouldn't assume that Pokémon can develop exactly the same way as humans can because wild ones would have very little understanding of human culture and because they would likely develop a society based on the way they naturally behave, technology based on the things they can't do naturally (like how humans developed cars to go faster than they can walk, guns to hunt efficiently, et cetera), and an understanding of each other based on how they view species before becoming smart (like how humans don't really bother chasing birds off their territory and view cows as food). In a non-lengthy sense, the OP should think about Pokémon on an animalistic level because that's how they exist in that world and because that's how humans developed (i.e., mental evolution from our monkey stage). There's not really fanon about it because I don't think you can argue that Pokémon don't live like animals (i.e., hunting and living like the animals they're based on, not living in cities, not using human technology) unless you want to start discussing the various plot holes in Mystery Dungeon. I mean, in every other canon, you can see Houndour hunting in packs, Pidgeotto swooping after bugs, and all that fun stuff that indicates that, yeah, they are animals.

So... yeah. Not fanon.

ChrisTom June 21st, 2010 10:21 AM

Ok, fair enough. My point though was that despite them being "animals" or whatever, they are all intelligent. Maybe not human intelligent, but like really smart dog intelligent. I'm sure you'd agree right?

JX Valentine June 21st, 2010 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChrisTom (Post 5899882)
Ok, fair enough. My point though was that despite them being "animals" or whatever, they are all intelligent. Maybe not human intelligent, but like really smart dog intelligent. I'm sure you'd agree right?

While they are (which is also what I've said in my first post -- *motions to the point about Alakazam*) this doesn't necessarily mean they'll develop into human-like societies. They still live as animals, with very simplistic lives and feral habits. Some are even implied to harbor a fear of humans. (*motions to wild Ralts*) They're not human in behavior, and they have more similarities to our idea of animals in terms of the way they live.

If they develop any further than that, they'll first off need a good reason for doing so and second off need the time to develop based on their own needs. For example, why would Pokémon need guns or other human weaponry when they have their own supernatural powers? Likewise, why would bird Pokémon develop airplanes if most of them can fly? Alternatively, if, for one reason or another (not that I'm recommending it -- see below), you choose to have all Pokémon live in harmony, why wouldn't bird Pokémon simply take up jobs to perform the same functions airplanes would?

Then, beyond technology, you've got to address the way they group themselves naturally. For example, you've got Butterfree, which are nomadic and don't seem to have any particular leader within a flock of them (*motions to the Butterfree flock in "Bye Bye Butterfree"*). Meanwhile, Combee are hive-minded and would probably continue to be hive-minded, with the Vespiquen making all the decisions in the hive. They probably won't have the exact same social structure as humans because humans have this drive to live in permanent settlements structured with a group leader. This is how cities ended up developing: to house the need for humans to have a permanent point in their territory which becomes the focus of their activity.

And, of course, then, you've got the question of whether or not other Pokémon would notice each other. It's a lot like how we view other primates. We might look at a chimpanzee, and although we have a lot of similarities and come from the same branch of the evolutionary tree, we don't see them the way we see other people. Pokémon should be the same way. Although they're all Pokémon, it's doubtful that a Pidgeot would view a Caterpie as its equal, especially if we're talking about descendants of wild Pokémon here. If you write about a war between different species that occupy the same planet, that's one thing you have to keep in mind: whether or not the species would actually view each other as equals. If Pikachu didn't live in the same groups/packs/whatever as Wartortle, why would they after gaining intelligence?

Point is, aside from the fact that you'd need more than ten years to develop a human-level intelligence to begin with, how intelligent they were to begin with becomes a sort of moot point. This is because of the way Pokémon are in what canon considers to be present-day. They have a completely different way of life and completely different physiology, so just because humans aren't around anymore doesn't mean that they'll replace and mimic humans, especially within a short period of time. The point, then, is that one needs to think about how these creatures would develop based on the way they act in the wild and what their physical limitations actually are because they'll most likely not develop the exact same social and technological ideas as humans, despite actually being intelligent.

What I'm trying to get the OP to address is a problem that a lot of rookie sci-fi writers face. Just because you have an intelligent species (be it extraterrestrial or Pokémon) doesn't mean it has to be humanoid in mindset, looks, whatever. Different species develop completely differently based on what they know about/can do with themselves and based on the environment that surrounds them. (Also another reason why there needs to be a good reason for the lack of humans: environment would play a huge factor in how these creatures advance.) They're alien -- not human. They really shouldn't be human, and just because they might be as smart as (or even smarter than, in the cases of numbers of Pokémon species according to the Pokédex) humanity doesn't necessarily mean they can end up with anything like what humans have further down the road.

Actually, if I may recommend a few things for inspiration, try on any of the books in Orson Scott Card's Enderverse. (Speaker for the Dead especially.) These books look like average sci-fi faire on the surface, but underneath, they deal with a lot of issues stemming from the fact that just because you're intelligent or otherwise able to become technologically advanced doesn't necessarily mean you'll behave like humans.

In other words, whether or not they're as intelligent as really smart dogs is still not really the point I was trying to make.

dempsey June 21st, 2010 2:58 PM

well this is all good advice but JX dose speak some truth why would flying pokemon need planes well thats just it were talking about transporting as well pokemon from one region to anoughter so planes would be practicle for the pokemon that couldent fly but then about guns for the pokemon well its a stupid idea right now but i was thiniing of it as a bit more of a amplaflier for there powers say for i gave a pokemon like a grovyle one now what he would do is he would take him self a shot a shot be the same as a clip and filling itwith his own power then puting it in a hole on the gun that could then be used to fire out lets say a improved bullet seed this is still some ideas and i am working on charters and more detail on the things they use

Astinus June 21st, 2010 4:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JX Valentine (Post 5899965)
Actually, if I may recommend a few things for inspiration, try on any of the books in Orson Scott Card's Enderverse. (Speaker for the Dead especially.) These books look like average sci-fi faire on the surface, but underneath, they deal with a lot of issues stemming from the fact that just because you're intelligent or otherwise able to become technologically advanced doesn't necessarily mean you'll behave like humans.

In fact, the first piece of advice Card gives when developing an alien species is to ask the question "How do they differ from humans?"

When writing about an alien species, you got to think about their history, their evolution, their society, and all that jazz. Pokemon as a whole have that, and as individual species.

So I wouldn't doubt that Pokemon aren't intelligent. (I'm a believer that they are.) But they're not humans. They developed differently.

This post just to show my Card nerdiness.

Delusions of Originality June 21st, 2010 5:34 PM

If you're looking for inspiration on this sort of thing, might I suggest checking out the Quintaglio Ascension trilogy by Robert Sawyer? At least the first book is out of print, if not also the other two, but a library might have them. In a nutshell, the series is about dinosaurs that aliens rescued from Earth shortly before their extinction sixty-five million years ago. The aliens put them on another planet to see how they would evolve without the risk of being wiped out. As it happened, the tyrannosaurs (the Quintaglio) did evolve a great deal of intelligence, and eventually civilization. They have social classes, religion, buildings, cities, ships, jobs, astronomers... but at the same time, it's quite clear that they're not just "humans in dinosaur suits", to paraphrase Jax. They don't use chairs but rather rest on long, inclined slabs, because the shape of their bodies doesn't allow them to sit comfortably. They're okay with the use of things like knives as tools, but they see using a knife as a weapon as a cowardly act (what do they need those for when they've got plenty of stabby-slashy things in their mouths and on their hands that they've been instinctively using for ages?). They don't touch one another without permission--no hugs, no handshakes, etc.--because their old instincts as territorial predators are still there, and uninvited physical contact triggers an attack response from the Quintaglio who was touched. Those are just a few examples of the sorts of things you can try.

Ninja Caterpie June 22nd, 2010 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dempsey (Post 5900276)
well this is all good advice but JX dose speak some truth why would flying pokemon need planes well thats just it were talking about transporting as well pokemon from one region to anoughter so planes would be practicle for the pokemon that couldent fly but then about guns for the pokemon well its a stupid idea right now but i was thiniing of it as a bit more of a amplaflier for there powers say for i gave a pokemon like a grovyle one now what he would do is he would take him self a shot a shot be the same as a clip and filling itwith his own power then puting it in a hole on the gun that could then be used to fire out lets say a improved bullet seed this is still some ideas and i am working on charters and more detail on the things they use

what was that i can't even read it wat wat wat

Like said before, you still have to have reasons why the Pokémon are even using the technology in the first place. Pokémon aren't humans. Some might be like us, but they aren't exactly us. Some won't even be able to use the technology (Like your Grovyle example - they don't have opposable thumbs) and others won't need it. You're can either ditch human technology or figure out a damn good reason that the Pokémon are using it.

Roxasabridged June 23rd, 2010 3:26 AM

I had this idea for an RP that I may also write as a fanfic. There's a few issues to work out, but here's a rough idea:

A scientist is trying to recreate the Pokerus Virus to make Pokemon even stronger, and sell it publicly.
He seemingly succeeds, testing it on various Pokemon and getting the exact same beneficts from the original Pokerus.
The Pokerus is made public and for a while, all is fine. However, roughly 8-12 years after being infected with the new Pokerus, the Pokemon die. The Virus' quick and aggressive spread made it impossible to contain and all Pokemon were killed within 30 years.

Over 300 years later, humans are suddenly finding themselves using techniques Pokemon once used. An institute is set up at the old location of Indigo Plateua (?) and the humans (dubbed 'PokeSpirits') are researched.

However, it turns out that the institute is a front to brainwash and enslave PokeSpirits as well as research, and will be used as weapons to take over the world. The PokeSpirits not recorded and found are in hiding from the Institute, still trying to come to terms with their abilities and figure out some answers to the 'PokeSpirit' inside them.

Shanghai Alice June 23rd, 2010 6:31 AM

I want to write a Touhou fanfic, involving the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Due to the fact that I am unaware of any detailed canon backstory for most of the characters (besides the very bare-bones details), I've decided to take what little information I have on their past and adapt it into full stories.

I wanted to do a few chapters for each of them, in the order I want them to appear.
Here are a few ideas:

-The Scarlet "Sisters"-

Remilia will arrive in Gensokyo, filthy rich and fairly powerful. She will soon realize that open conflict with humans will drive her food source to extinction, so she instead builds a house out in the woods (Complete with everything needed to live in luxury), and reigns in a few fairies.

Flandre's addition will come to me later...

-Hong Meirin-
China is a wandering youkai from... China. She stumbles across Gensokyo and the Scarlet Devil Mansion, and challenges Remilia to a fight. She loses spectacularly, but Remilia, impressed with her ability, allows her to become a gatekeeper.

-Patchouli Knowledge-
Patchouli Knowledge, a youkai magician from the Human Village, arrives at the Scarlet Devil Mansion seeking refuge from the humans. Remilia decides it would be a good idea to have somebody who can run things. She accepts, and Patchouli begins building up her library.

When she arrives at the mansion, she gets beaten to a bloody pulp by Hong Meirin, starting the enmity between the two.

-Sakuya Izayoi-
Sakuya wakes up in Fuyuki Hakurei's shrine, remembering only her orders to assassinate Remilia Scarlet, her abilities, and information about Gensokyo. She makes a beeline for the Mansion, and, after an epic fight with Remilia, is drafted into the vampire's service. Remilia gives her the name "Sakuya Izayoi."

I'm also thinking of including a few scenes of Sakuya in the Human Village, if only to demonstrate the cold(er) person Sakuya initially was.



Ehhh... what do y'all think?

Roxasabridged June 23rd, 2010 7:49 AM

I think it sounds interesting. Can't suggest much since I know nothing about Touhou, though.

JX Valentine June 23rd, 2010 8:32 AM

Shanghai Alice: Sorry I can't offer any advice to yours. I've never touched The Touhou Project, so I really can't say anything without possibly pointing out something that's actually just a canon thing. (For example, I have no idea what some of your terminology refers to, and it sounds like your bunny would be a lot more interesting if I did.) All I can say is I'm not sure how popular the games are, so I'm equally uncertain as to how much of an audience you'll attract on a Pokémon forum.

That being said...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Roxasabridged (Post 5904178)
A scientist is trying to recreate the Pokerus Virus to make Pokemon even stronger, and sell it publicly.
He seemingly succeeds, testing it on various Pokemon and getting the exact same beneficts from the original Pokerus.
The Pokerus is made public and for a while, all is fine. However, roughly 8-12 years after being infected with the new Pokerus, the Pokemon die. The Virus' quick and aggressive spread made it impossible to contain and all Pokemon were killed within 30 years.

While it's interesting to have a Pokémon-focused epidemic wipe out the Pokémon population, you'll want to think of a couple of things:

1. Eight to ten years' incubation time isn't really a "quick and aggressive" spread of a virus. This is assuming you didn't mean it mutated in eight to ten years (i.e., assuming that you meant that each Pokémon died within eight to ten years after receiving the Pokérus virus). For a comparison, try looking up the Black Death, which killed roughly a third of Europe's population within two years. The course of the disease (at least, from the time of contraction to the time of death) was only about a week, and this was bacterial-based. Viruses like the flu can be up to half that time. Of course, a virus can have any variety of symptoms (which in turn could mean it could detected at any length of time -- including, in some cases, not at all), but if you want your virus to be a deadly epidemic, it always helps to do some research into historical epidemics to figure out how to make yours a bit more believable.

2. Also, think about how this virus is transmitted. If it was given to trainers only via injection, unless it mutated into a more contagious form fairly quickly, wild Pokémon probably went untouched unless this concentrated 'rus displays the same behavior as Pokérus itself (i.e., contagious through skin-to-skin contact).

3. Ecology. Pokémon represent a huge part of the ecology of that world, with some (legendaries) even being embodiments of nature itself. If you wipe out several hundred species all at once, you're risking throwing the balance of nature off, which would no doubt result in horrific things happening to the environment and to humanity itself. Be careful.

4. Remember that this is a virus, one that (in the present of the games, at least) isn't well researched to begin with. You'll have to ask the question of how many people would be willing to infect their Pokémon with a virus -- and, of course, whether or not this is a moot point, considering point #2.

In other words, viruses aren't bad for a concept, but I'm just saying put a lot of thought into it. You could potentially come out with something interesting (like a post-apocalyptic hell); it just depends on how you handle the virus.

As for the rest of the concept, I can't say too much that you'll probably answer within your fic as it is. For example, did the humans magically get these abilities, or is it a new step in human evolution? (This would classify your fic as either a fantasy or a sci-fi piece.) Considering the human race has been living without Pokémon for roughly three centuries, would the Institute have the technology to take over the world without the PokéSpirits? (This question would mean that the army would actually be pretty pointless. As in, the human race would have moved away from depending on Pokémon powers and towards relying on technological weaponry, which in three centuries could have advanced to the point where an untrained piece of flesh would be laughed at by a robot with a nice gun. In other words, who would the Institute be fighting against, and would it be worth it to them to capture and enslave mutants as opposed to building bigger robots and either eradicating the mutants -- if they thought the Spirits would pose a remote threat to said robots -- or just ignoring them?)

On that note, I don't know. There's a lot of fics/RPs out there that entail "I have a special group of people with special powers, and there's someone out there who wants to use these people to take over the world." This is actually part of the reason why I'm telling you to think about these questions and concepts and figure out where things might need to be tweaked. It's an interesting idea on the surface, but if you don't ask these kinds of things, you may run into problems with cliché or WTFery.

Good luck, though.

Shanghai Alice June 23rd, 2010 9:40 AM

Ahh, that actually is a good point.

I upload most of them to another website, anyway.

I was just wondering if any of them sounded cliche on the surface.

Thanks for the feedback!

Ruin Maniac June 23rd, 2010 2:23 PM

Meh...Help please
 
I've currently been mulling over a fanfic that's been building up for quite a while now. Any help would be appreciated.

The main story is set in Hoenn, but spreads and overlaps onto Sinnoh aswell.

Team Magma and Aqua are at war. Hostilities have been rising for quite a while now, and after a certain incident * cough* spoiler *cough*, it erupts into an all out war. Ordinary civilians are forced to pick a side as the battle swells and rages on. This isn't just your average gang turf war, this is two armies consisting of millions fighting for the greater good, the main caualties - pokemon. However, the main character, is stuck in the middle, torn by revenge, undecided which side to take, if any.

i know this sounds quite confusing, but im looking for a beta reader over the next couple of weeks, who will become much more enlightened by the events and the cogs of the story

Thankyou, and feel free to criticize/comment as you please

Rabbit June 23rd, 2010 5:03 PM

I'm wondering, what role does the main character play? Is he just there to narrate events? Does he determine the outcome of the war? Is the revenge bit relevant?

Frankly, I can't imagine how Team Aqua and Team Magma could start a full-scale war. Each team is a criminal organization with goals that are supposedly benevolent but, in the final analysis, kind of absurd. What would make me, an ordinary civilian, take up arms and join their cause?

Astinus June 23rd, 2010 9:38 PM

I'm also confused as to why everyone is fighting in the war. I know it seems more epic to include everyone and their Growlithe in wars, but there's still a need for the common everyday person to do their job, even in wartime. Soldiers need weapons, everyone needs food. And heck, medical care is needed if people/Pokemon are fighting.

And as Rabbit said, why would people join the cause? What would make someone think "Oh, we definitely need way more water to live!"

If you're looking for a beta reader, there's a thread stickied in this forum just for that purpose.

Shanghai Alice June 24th, 2010 11:19 AM

You're forgetting the fact that the Pokemon are probably the weapons. But everything else still holds.

People don't join war for the sake of war. Propaganda, occupation, threats, incentives... All of that plays a factor. And you also have the anti-war folks, and the neutral folks.

Everyone needs a motive.

For an easy way out, remember some people simply enjoy killing. That's how my protagonist got supporters. You find a warlord who likes breaking things, and convince them to join. They bring their vassals/servants. Hooray!

ChrisTom June 24th, 2010 11:51 AM

Ok guys, I have a couple ideas to run by you:

1. A small island town is about to experience a hurricane. A Pikachu who get's lost from her family befriends a trainer who decides to seek shelter at the local Lighthouse. Upon entering they discover an ancient secret, having to do with Lanturn, Relicanth, and the birth of the ocean...

2. Okay, my main question with this is should it be a story or an RP? I can't really decide. The town of Cinnabar Island is struck with fear. There have been sightings. Sightings of something so strange, so otherworldly, so terrifying that it peirces their hearts with fear at the mere name of it. Some say it's nothing more than mass hysteria. But after one boy's father get's killed by it, he knows he'll have to unravel the secret of: The Cinnabar Anomaly. Yes, I stole the name from the fanon Pokedex, don't judge me.

Please tell me what you guys think! Feel free to critiscise as you please. I am excited to hear any and all thoughts you wish to say!

With all regards,

-ChrisTom

Astinus June 24th, 2010 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shanghai Alice (Post 5908329)
You're forgetting the fact that the Pokemon are probably the weapons.

There have been canon instances of war where the humans fought, either against or with Pokemon. Trainers might fight one another while their Pokemon are fighting, or there just might be Pokemon-less humans who want to fight.

Besides, take a look at pictures from any war in the Pokemon world. Humans and Pokemon are wearing armor, and you need someone still to make and repair that. Same with medicine and food. If just the Pokemon are fighting, then there's still Centers that should be kept running, medicine that should still be produced for quick healing, and food that should be produced.

Which is all that I was thinking of when I said that not everyone can actually be fighting.

ChrisTom posted while I did, so that's why I didn't respond to him. That, and I need to go soon.

JX Valentine June 24th, 2010 2:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChrisTom (Post 5908410)
1. A small island town is about to experience a hurricane. A Pikachu who get's lost from her family befriends a trainer who decides to seek shelter at the local Lighthouse. Upon entering they discover an ancient secret, having to do with Lanturn, Relicanth, and the birth of the ocean...

Doesn't sound too bad. Of course, the concept hinges on what the secret is and where you go from there, given the fact that this discovery (of the secret at least) seems like the beginning of the story.

Quote:

2. Okay, my main question with this is should it be a story or an RP? I can't really decide. The town of Cinnabar Island is struck with fear. There have been sightings. Sightings of something so strange, so otherworldly, so terrifying that it peirces their hearts with fear at the mere name of it. Some say it's nothing more than mass hysteria. But after one boy's father get's killed by it, he knows he'll have to unravel the secret of: The Cinnabar Anomaly. Yes, I stole the name from the fanon Pokedex, don't judge me.
Because you're really focusing on only one person's perspective of the events, it's probably best to leave it as a story. An RP would require you to open up the possibility for other people to jump in and want to investigate this mystery. Given the fact that this is a mystery that might actually require you to link that death with the sightings (because I'm not sure if the boy would watch his father get killed by a monster and be completely stable after that -- not to mention I'm not sure how many people would believe him if he said his father was killed by said monster), it seems like more of a private investigation, rather than something just anyone can jump into with their own characters (even if you tried to limit the cast to a handful of open slots).

Long story short, it's a murder mystery about a boy trying to connect his father's death with strange sightings of a monster that may or may not actually exist. It would, as a consequence, probably focus on that boy's quest to discover the truth because the circumstances of the death would most likely be incredibly shady.

ChrisTom June 24th, 2010 5:05 PM

Well JXValentine, my idea for the Cinnabar Anamoly would be that if it was an RP that it would be like you said: people coming in and trying to solve the case. I would tell the participants that they are from various parts of the Pokemon World and that all of them are sort of "Detectives". If you'd like me to show you more of the story-in-progress please PM me. I will even spoil the juicy deets to you if recquisitioned.

JX Valentine June 24th, 2010 5:16 PM

Even so, your story seems to revolve most around a single character, and it seems to be built on paranormal investigation, not just your average CSI. This means that it will have more emotional impact (and therefore allow for more character development) for a single character and not your outlying detectives because it's related most to the kid's father.

Additionally, as I've said above, your detectives will most likely be paranormal investigators because they're getting into purported sightings of an unknown creature. Think about how seriously a lot of people take alien or ghost hunters in the real world. You have people who do, but for the most part, not everyone does. This means the investigation will be harder for your detectives, even to the point of potentially causing your main character to mistrust them a little. I mean, if someone came up to you and said they completely believe your story about how your father was killed by something everyone else says doesn't exist, how would you react?

ChrisTom June 24th, 2010 5:46 PM

Very true. I didn't think about that...

I've been really interested in Forensics and Mysteries recently, as I just read my first Sherlock Holmes. The mystery of Boscombe Valley was very good.

JX Valentine June 24th, 2010 9:56 PM

Oh yeah. Boscombe Valley's pretty good itself, although my favorite would probably be Scandal in Bohemia. I'd say why, but it'd be a spoiler.

But yes. Mystery isn't an easy genre to work with. While it's great when it's pulled off, you'll need to think about every last detail and every last step, which is something else I didn't actually bring up. In order to make the mystery reach the conclusion you want, you'll have to have not only the ending planned out in detail but also every last step that gets to it. While it's possible to have an RPG like this (if you used the "storybook" format and advanced the plot only when certain conditions are met for each chapter), you'll need tighter control over your players than normal if you want them to notice all the clues -- including the way all NPCs behave with regards to this mystery -- you've had in mind. Actually, Sherlock Holmes should be a good example of this, so definitely keep reading and take note on how Holmes picks up on the tiniest details that eventually lend to the way he solves this mystery. Feel free to use Doyle as a springboard for ideas on how to work in the subtle details you'll want for that climactic conclusion.

If you're dealing with paranormal investigations (because you very well could turn around and say, "No, really, it was just a guy who killed this kid's father."), it's even taking it a step up because you're going to have to figure out how to get these characters to arrive to the conclusion that it's not just some person who did the murdering. This would require convincing not just the cast but also the reader -- who might be expecting a Scooby-Doo-style "man in a mask" conclusion -- that it really is that mysterious creature lurking on the sides of the shores.

Good luck either way.

ChrisTom June 24th, 2010 10:02 PM

Well the story isn't so much Mystery as it is Paranormal. I really wanted to focus on the Anamoly itself. I make it very clear that this Anamoly is real, so it's more about the kid finding out what in heaven's name it is. I do want it to have a feeling slightly akin to your "Man in the mask" thing, but just a little bit to where the reader might be thinking some person's controlling it. I also was hoping to try and lean in on the Horror Genre as the death was caused by, well... I'd like to send you a copy of a rough draft for the first chapter if that's alright. Please let me know. Thanks again.

With all regards,

-ChrisTom

Roxasabridged June 25th, 2010 6:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JX Valentine (Post 5904678)
While it's interesting to have a Pokémon-focused epidemic wipe out the Pokémon population, you'll want to think of a couple of things:

1. Eight to ten years' incubation time isn't really a "quick and aggressive" spread of a virus. This is assuming you didn't mean it mutated in eight to ten years (i.e., assuming that you meant that each Pokémon died within eight to ten years after receiving the Pokérus virus). For a comparison, try looking up the Black Death, which killed roughly a third of Europe's population within two years. The course of the disease (at least, from the time of contraction to the time of death) was only about a week, and this was bacterial-based. Viruses like the flu can be up to half that time. Of course, a virus can have any variety of symptoms (which in turn could mean it could detected at any length of time -- including, in some cases, not at all), but if you want your virus to be a deadly epidemic, it always helps to do some research into historical epidemics to figure out how to make yours a bit more believable.

I wasn't too detailed earlier. I tend to miss things when typing on a Wii. When I say quick and aggressive, I mean that the virus infects Pokemon on contact, and the beneficial side is almost instantly activated. Basically, it's a normal Pokerus Virus... With fatal effects much later on.

Quote:

2. Also, think about how this virus is transmitted. If it was given to trainers only via injection, unless it mutated into a more contagious form fairly quickly, wild Pokémon probably went untouched unless this concentrated 'rus displays the same behavior as Pokérus itself (i.e., contagious through skin-to-skin contact).
Yeah, like I said above, it spreads on contact, and all Pokemon would be affected sooner or later.

Quote:

3. Ecology. Pokémon represent a huge part of the ecology of that world, with some (legendaries) even being embodiments of nature itself. If you wipe out several hundred species all at once, you're risking throwing the balance of nature off, which would no doubt result in horrific things happening to the environment and to humanity itself. Be careful.
Yeah, I understand Legendaries being important for controlling certain aspects of the world. I was planning on having them in a hibernative status, trying to combat the Pokerus effects they contracted, or just not interacting with the world.

Quote:

4. Remember that this is a virus, one that (in the present of the games, at least) isn't well researched to begin with. You'll have to ask the question of how many people would be willing to infect their Pokémon with a virus -- and, of course, whether or not this is a moot point, considering point #2.
The scientist would have studied Pokerus for a while, saw its beneficial effects, and try to recreate it. New or power hungry trainers would've used the Pokerus to get stronger, not considering the consequences. More skeptical trainers would have had their Pokemon contract it through battles or interaction regardless.

Quote:

In other words, viruses aren't bad for a concept, but I'm just saying put a lot of thought into it. You could potentially come out with something interesting (like a post-apocalyptic hell); it just depends on how you handle the virus.

As for the rest of the concept, I can't say too much that you'll probably answer within your fic as it is. For example, did the humans magically get these abilities, or is it a new step in human evolution? (This would classify your fic as either a fantasy or a sci-fi piece.) Considering the human race has been living without Pokémon for roughly three centuries, would the Institute have the technology to take over the world without the PokéSpirits? (This question would mean that the army would actually be pretty pointless. As in, the human race would have moved away from depending on Pokémon powers and towards relying on technological weaponry, which in three centuries could have advanced to the point where an untrained piece of flesh would be laughed at by a robot with a nice gun. In other words, who would the Institute be fighting against, and would it be worth it to them to capture and enslave mutants as opposed to building bigger robots and either eradicating the mutants -- if they thought the Spirits would pose a remote threat to said robots -- or just ignoring them?)
I don't want to give too much away, but the PokeSpirits can be considered the first step to reviving Pokemon through complex means.
As for technology, given the overall lack of weapons the games seem to have, and how evil plots seem to revolve around Legendary Pokemon (Which everyone believes is dead) No one sees any real point in fighting with no overwhelming power to back up their group. However, seeing as a lack of weapons is pretty stupid, I could try shortening the time that the world's spent without Pokemon to about... fifty years? The world would be on a slow decline to ruin, and may make it easier to write about.

Quote:

On that note, I don't know. There's a lot of fics/RPs out there that entail "I have a special group of people with special powers, and there's someone out there who wants to use these people to take over the world." This is actually part of the reason why I'm telling you to think about these questions and concepts and figure out where things might need to be tweaked. It's an interesting idea on the surface, but if you don't ask these kinds of things, you may run into problems with cliché or WTFery.

Good luck though.
Thanks.

JX Valentine June 25th, 2010 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChrisTom (Post 5909902)
I'd like to send you a copy of a rough draft for the first chapter if that's alright. Please let me know. Thanks again.

Sure. Fine by me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Roxasabridged (Post 5910613)
When I say quick and aggressive, I mean that the virus infects Pokemon on contact, and the beneficial side is almost instantly activated.

In that case, it's not aggressive. An aggressive virus would be if the negative effects kicked in right away unless you consider what it's doing to be beneficial (i.e., strengthen a Pokémon physically) to be an unintended side-effect of an attack on the victims' immune system.

Quote:

Yeah, like I said above, it spreads on contact, and all Pokemon would be affected sooner or later.
Also keep in mind several things I said earlier. First off, it's doubtful that all trainers would rush out to get the virus applied to their Pokémon. Remember, it's primarily considered a virus -- a disease. On top of that, in many canon continuities, amping up your Pokémon artificially isn't exactly taken lightly. (The anime, for example, encourages in numbers of episodes that it's pure training that gets Pokémon to be strong, not necessarily artificial boosters. Hence a lot of Ash's special training. Poké Special, if I recall correctly, is pretty similar in this regard -- or at least the people who go out to amp up their Pokémon's power artificially are the gullible ones, given how Blue comes into the story. While the games allow and encourage the PC to do it, people like Karen also imply that training isn't necessarily about having the most powerful Pokémon around.)

On top of that, not a lot of Pokémon are easily accessible. Legendaries like Ho-oh, for example, need to be summoned in order to make an appearance towards humans, and numbers of others (like the Lake Guardians) are sealed away in manners that make it extremely difficult to access them. It was only part of the game's plot that a single PC did.

Then, of course, you've got places like Mt. Silver, which is heavily restricted in terms of access in the first place. It'd be highly doubtful that the Pokémon League, who runs the guard post just before the route to that place, would allow trainers through if their Pokémon were on the equivalent of steroids.

Of course, this also brings up a couple of other good points I'd forgotten earlier:

1. Not everyone reacts to a disease the same way, and not every disease is a death sentence. For example, there have been people who had survived every flu epidemic in history. Given how many Pokémon there are in the world (i.e., how it's unlikely that they all got infected within the first year, given that this is limited to contact only), chances are, someone would have done more research into the disease before the fatalities kicked in or during the epidemic to develop medicines and vaccines to combat the illness.
1a. That and unless the milder form of Pokérus behaves completely differently and is genetically different to the concentrated form, you've already got a number of Pokémon who would be immune to it, just on the virtue of having had the virus already. (This goes especially for a fic that's using game canon.)

2. Not everyone reacts to a disease the same way. Sure, it sounds like a repeat point, but remember that everyone's immune system is different. This includes every immune system between non-humans, too. If Pokémon start dying early because of the disease, there will probably be a lot of investigation as to why, especially if the disease is pretty obvious by then (which it probably would be if you've got something that's perfectly healthy just keel over due to organ failure).
2a. As a side note, this is why I really don't think eight to ten years is viable for an incubation period. Diseases mutate extremely quickly. For example, the flu virus mutates as quickly as once a year, which is why you have to get a new vaccination annually. Bacteria is the same way; it's not unusual for antimicrobial-resistant strains to pop up just because you use hand sanitizer on a constant basis. (This sounds paranoid, but it actually isn't.)

Actually, to help you understand how a virus might work, I'd recommend playing this game. Granted, it assumes that the disease you're creating is a lot like the flu, but it should give you an idea of how quickly something like that might spread if only a small population has it in the first place.

Alternatively, if you can, try to find Stephen King's short story "The End of the Whole Mess" because it's essentially a lot like the story you're pitching, only with people, a shorter incubation period, and a pretty good reason for why something this dangerous would be released on nature.

3. Even beyond that, you'll probably have issues with the Pokémon League. Remember, it's like a sports league, so most likely, they'll put serious regulations into place because it'd be a lot like taking steroids (ones whose risks haven't been fully researched). It might actually be illegal to use the Pokérus enhancement, or they'd simply try to come up with major restrictions on its use. Whatever they do should be an issue you'll want to think about as well.

Quote:

Yeah, I understand Legendaries being important for controlling certain aspects of the world.
I'm not just talking about legendaries, either. When you wipe out multiple huge populations of anything, there's going to be some serious repercussions on the environment as a whole. For example, think about what would happen if all of the insects in the world suddenly disappeared. Very little would get pollinated, for one thing, which means massive amounts of plants would die off right there. Then, of course, they're a major part of the food chain, which means massive other species would die off. It would leave a huge impact on humans because a huge chunk of what we eat and take for granted are either pollinated by or fed by insects.

Pokémon's the same way, only even more so because the humans in that world not only acknowledge their dependence on them but also go out of their way to make it so that their ordinary lives intertwine with Pokémon in some fashion. Removing these supports would be a lot like finding a house on stilts and then taking a sledgehammer to its supports. Considering how many species there are in that world and how humans have always been at a point where they literally cannot function without Pokémon being some part of their lives, it's actually questionable as to whether humans would actually survive that kind of mass-extinction.

Quote:

The scientist would have studied Pokerus for a while, saw its beneficial effects, and try to recreate it.
This is why I'm recommending that you find a way to read "The End of the Whole Mess" if you can -- because thorough testing after screwing around with things that occur in nature on a genetic level is extremely important. (Considering the way today's general microbiology works, yes, you could probably figure out how much of a risk mutation and fatalism could be in a virus.)

Quote:

As for technology, given the overall lack of weapons the games seem to have, and how evil plots seem to revolve around Legendary Pokemon (Which everyone believes is dead) No one sees any real point in fighting with no overwhelming power to back up their group.
I know you admit later that a lack of weapons might be a plot hole, but I'd just like to say that the only reason why they don't have conventional weapons in the games is because Pokémon are the weapons. Put it this way: imagine Earth as it is today. Now, have every gun just abruptly disappear. Just because the guns are gone doesn't mean the wars in this world will magically end. It's just that the military will have to figure out a completely new way of fighting to maintain power.

Moreover, it should be noted that not every evil team's goal necessarily needs legendary Pokémon. Sure, you've got Teams Magma and Aqua, which hinge on the idea that Kyogre and Groudon will help them. However, Team Rocket's goal is simply to take over the world. It's just that legendary Pokémon would have been an easy way to get firepower to reach that. However, without legendary Pokémon, Team Rocket will still want to take over the world and maintain their power over people. So, what's the most logical thing to do? Come up with a way to stabilize their hold on society, and come up with this way as quickly as possible. Chances are, they'll be quick on the uptake when it comes to developing weapons. They might not be the same as real-world weapons (although if the anime and manga canon has anything to say about it, they've already got firearms and other advanced killing technology), but they'd do it if they wanted to keep going for their goal to be a major threat to, well, anyone.

Moreover, you've still got the Pokémon world's militaries to worry about. As Astinus pointed out about someone else's "everyone's in a war" idea, there's still wars being fought in the Pokémon world. (Lt. Surge should be evidence enough for this, as should his gym trainers.) No one ever said that Pokémon are the only weapons being used in combat, just that they make things easier. Once Pokémon are gone, though, you'll still have those military-versus-whoever combats, and you'll still need some kind of weapon in order to avoid getting annihilated by whatever world power comes to threaten you. After all, unless the Pokémon world's people are somehow devoid of basic human instinct, this race has the tendency to get territorial and violent. In the history of mankind, there has been no group of people who have not seen some form of combat (hunting, tribal wars, whatever). So, of course, it's going to continue, and of course, humans will want to make sure their fraction of the species is more powerful than some other fraction of the species.

Or putting it in simpler terms, the human race in reality could have just decided there would be no real point advancing themselves when everyone just had clubs and bows and arrows. However, we had to advance because we're pissants who like fighting each other with ridiculous amounts of force.

So, yeah, even if you give them fifty years, someone will probably scramble to advance weapon technology upon seeing how this world might just descend into chaos due to the mass-extinction of Pokémon. Gotta keep order somehow, after all.

In short, yeah, keep thinking about it.

TheLegendaryMew June 26th, 2010 3:09 PM

Tell Me What You Think :)
 
Ok well i started on this a while back but ive been so busy i didnt get it completed, then i reset my computer so i lost it QQ. Anyways i just wanted to ask you all if you could rate this story plot. The name of the Story is called Leeds City Boys.

Ok so basically the plot centers around 4 main characters. Ryan, Mark, Scott and Racheal. Ryan and Mark are best freinds, Scott is Ryan's brother and Racheal is Mark's sister. Ryan, Mark and Racheal go to the same college as each other. Ryan is in love with Racheal but Mark dosent know. Anyways thats the basic outline of the characters :P

The storyline is:

One day Ryan comes home from college and switches the News on. He sees a big headline flashing at him about the increased number of gangs been formed in his hometown of Leeds. He gets a brilliant flash of inspiration to create his own gang to combat the gangs already been made. He tells Mark this and Mark goes along with the idea. They recruit some people and grow very quickly. They name thier gang "Leeds City Boys" or "LCB" for short. But then they get greedy with power. The LCB turns into the very thing they were trying to stop. With Money, Power, Fear and Respect on thier side nothing will stop them from terrorizing Leeds. They quickly rise through the ranks to become one of the most feared gangs in Leeds. They now have to make a choice. Either continue on the path there on and wind up dead or stop now well they still have time and go back to what the LCB was originally formed to do: Stop gangs terrorising the city. Will Ryan have the willpower to call it quits?

Neelh June 26th, 2010 11:40 PM

@TLM Nice! It looks quite awesome! But Racheal needs more time. She just looks like a little random addition.

TheLegendaryMew June 27th, 2010 1:21 AM

@Neelh Thanks! :) Its my first story plot so its nice to hear some good feedback. Hmm yeah your right about that ill give her some more time in the story :D

Ruin Maniac June 27th, 2010 8:25 AM

Yes, Racheal needs more time, but what about the character of Scott. if you ask me, I think you need to flesh out your characters more before you go on to writing any chapters yet.

Kung Fu Ferret June 27th, 2010 10:18 AM

(Original Fiction) Paleo Rage
 
I have had this idea in my head for YEARS (before I even joined PC), and it shares some similarities with Dinosaur King (but I've had this idea before I even heard of it), along with Digimon, Pokemon, and multiple other series that would take too long to list. It's about time I put it down on a board to see what you guys think.

The year is 2040 and our world has been aligned with another, one with species extinct in our own world, but there's a catch: Each of these species have one of ten elemental groups (Fire, Light, Ice, Air, Electric, Ground, Nature, Water, Metal, and Darkness), one of two alignment classes (Positive and Negative), and can use telepathy to communicate with chosen few humans. Time travel exists now, but has not yet been truly perfected by scientists, and therefore is a secret kept by a select group of organizations, but they plan to give it out to other groups 5 years later.

In the "World of the Lost Species", as some have improperly dubbed it, a conflict is beginning, and ten human teenagers from our have teamed up with an individual of a species from the other, to save both worlds from their ultimate destruction.

The ten chosen creatures (Element) Nickname [Species]
(Fire) Blaze [Tyrannosaurus Rex]
(Light) Kari [Dimetrodon]
(Ice) Glacia [Woolly Mammoth]
(Air) Zephyr [Quetzalcoatlus]
(Electric) Shocker [Phorusrhacos]
(Ground) Terra [Baluchitherium]
(Nature) Verde [Triceratops]
(Water) Marina [Icthyostega]
(Metal) Crunch [Smilodon Fatalis]
(Darkness) Leroy [Stegosaurus]

(Their humans allies will be revealed later, because I can't remember them or find the paper I wrote them down on)

JX Valentine June 27th, 2010 12:23 PM

@ Digimon Kaiser: It's not bad in terms of a concept, but the problem is, right now, it's vague and generic. As in, it pretty much sounds a lot like every season of Digimon coupled with Dino King and maybe (if you squint) Spider Riders. That's not to say it's a bad idea. It's really all in what you do with it beyond that point.

Right now, you've mentioned an organization that's keeping time travel a secret, but we don't know how that ties in with the story of the two worlds coming together. (I'm personally thinking the fact that you're writing about dinosaurs is a hint, but I can't even be too sure here.) Likewise, you mention a conflict, but a conflict can be anything from an all-out war between countries in the other world or a race to stop an evil dinosaur from destroying/taking over both worlds or a race to stop the mystery organization from abusing their ability to time travel. We don't really know, and that's really where the meat of the story will be. You can have really awesome ideas for monsters and magical worlds, but your story can fall apart with the plot concept (which is more than just "teens are pairing up with dinosaur partners").

StarBreak July 3rd, 2010 9:51 AM

I have this idea of a Pokémorph fanfic. It takes place in a world where all the Pokémon were killed by an accidental release of an experimental GM virus. The same virus messed up with the DNA of humans, giving them the power to morph, at the price of a halved lifespan. There will be war for a certain something. A cure, perhaps?

I need help with the battle system. What will a one-on-one battle resemble? How will strategies change if only one Pokémon is used? How should I implement the traditional six-on-six battle?

In short, what do you think can happen in a world where only Pokémorphs are the intelligent life form?

JX Valentine July 3rd, 2010 10:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StarBreak (Post 5935080)
I need help with the battle system. What will a one-on-one battle resemble? How will strategies change if only one Pokémon is used? How should I implement the traditional six-on-six battle?

The answer you're looking for can be summed up in a single sentence: Think about how wild Pokémon would battle.

See, it's not unusual for a Pokémon to use itself as the only combatant, and it's equally not unusual for a battle to be less than a one-on-one match. (Six-on-six technically isn't even all that traditional. Think about how many trainers in the games or the anime use their full roster against another trainer. That kind of thing is usually reserved for special battles; most of the trainers in either canon carry around less than that, while the game's hero avatar usually only needs a handful to take out NPCs.) So, for a Pokémorph battle, all you need to do is think about how one of these wild Pokémon would engage in battle with others. Sure, the Pokémon in question would have a human mind, but other than that (and, of course, differences in the way a morph's body would work compared to the way a full Pokémon's body attacks), it's pretty much the same.

In terms of strategy, yes, it'd be different. If your story takes place only a little while after the virus hits, people will probably be incredibly cautious when it comes to a match unless you're trying to say something about their general character. After all, they've got only one shot at winning. They can't simply switch in another Pokémon when the going gets tough. Most of all, they're directly involved in all the danger. Although Pokémon battling's a huge sport, I'm not sure how many people would readily jump into a Rock Slide themselves.

Of course, you could potentially have a tag-team battle happen, where morphs team up with other morphs to fight. Some might even "switch in" if the single opponent they're battling happens to have advantages over them. Professional wrestling actually does this kind of thing a lot. It might give you some ideas on how to go about doing it.

Other than that, the concept's pretty vague. A lot of people write about morphs in a war of one kind or another, but you could be cooking up something that puts a new spin on the genre. *shrug* Good luck.

Delusions of Originality July 3rd, 2010 5:27 PM

I would add the general caveat that you should be careful about how you explain the nature of the virus, why it's logically able to give people the ability to morph/turn them into morphs/etc., why the same virus turns two different people into two different and possibly entirely unrelated species (scizor and espeon, say), so on and so forth. More mature, serious readers tend to tire of pokémorph stories very quickly because the authors just want "people with pokémon powers" and throw together some slipshod excuse that, in the end, makes very little logical sense (see the groan-inducingly typical "um well Team Rocket did it *vague distracting handwave*", though it looks like you're steering away from that and its ilk so far). You probably don't have to launch into a whole genetics lesson, but you're going to have to work a bit harder to make it believable than someone writing another genre precisely because it comes with such a heavy stigma attached. If you haven't already, I'd suggest reading Dragonfree's Morphic--much more logical take on morphs than one usually sees, and well-written in general. Dragonfree's morphs are still intentionally created, not an accidental mutation caused by a virus, but it could still give you some ideas.

Actually, once you've established a pretty firm explanation for how these morphs came to be, it might help you iron out some of the details of the battle system. To what degree are these people morphed? How does it affect their stamina, their mentality (i.e. do they take on some pokémon instincts along with their human intelligence? Does it make them more aggressive)? How much abuse, especially in the form of elemental attacks, are they capable of taking? How powerful are the attacks they can use? This can help you determine, for example, whether or not they're actually battling with the intent to knock one another out, or whether it's expected that the loser cries uncle before he/she is too badly injured (which might be what you want if single competitors constantly being knocked silly is one of your concerns).

StarBreak July 8th, 2010 8:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JX Valentine (Post 5935125)
(Six-on-six technically isn't even all that traditional. Think about how many trainers in the games or the anime use their full roster against another trainer. That kind of thing is usually reserved for special battles; most of the trainers in either canon carry around less than that, while the game's hero avatar usually only needs a handful to take out NPCs.)

You caught your own mistake right there. NPCs are not human; they cannot think for themselves. They are programmed to be easy to beat in the storyline. When a real human competes against another real human, both wants to win, therefore both will use whatever it takes to win. If you have taken part in competitive battling (Wifi, Shoddy etc), you will know that many players use Pokémon that compliment each other (eg. Celetran, SkarmBliss), revolve around a general strategy (eg. defensive teams, weather teams, Trick Room teams) or help the main attacker reach its potential (eg. Suicidal Stealth Rock leads, Baton Passers, Memento and Dual Screen users). It is highly unlikely to find a filler unless the team can function efficiently with five members or less. It's all about the teamwork.

The anime can afford to have a smaller team because one-on-one battles are more common, and they are very likely to be friendly competitions in which a loss is not really something to cry about. In a war, you either kill, be killed or both when forced to fight.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JX Valentine (Post 5935125)
Of course, you could potentially have a tag-team battle happen, where morphs team up with other morphs to fight. Some might even "switch in" if the single opponent they're battling happens to have advantages over them. Professional wrestling actually does this kind of thing a lot. It might give you some ideas on how to go about doing it.

Sounds like a good idea. I'll look into it.

I have been thinking about something. What if there are more than one virus created for the same war in the past? How does this idea of a virus race sound?

The Pokérus affects all Pokémon, so the humans on one side of the war genetically modified the virus beforehand in an effort to at least weaken enemy Pokémon. The new Pokérus eliminates whatever immunity the host had instead of promoting its growth. Think of it as a Pokémon HIV. They also developed a vaccine for their Pokémon, with its data was stored in the computer system and classified as top military secret. Spies risked their lives trying to steal the information, but found it easier to just permanently delete it. The research team had to start from scratch. Unfortunately, the GM Pokérus was somehow accidentally released before the project was completed. It was already too late by the time the vaccine was ready. There were no more Pokémon to save. That war became the first war with battles between humans only.

The same thing basically happens at the meanwhile on the other side with two big differences. The humans genetically modified another virus, this one to kill people. They, of course, also developed a vaccine for their side of the war. For a while, everything went as expected. They were winning as their human enemies were dying to both the virus and the usual dangers of war.

Back to the Pokérus modifiers' side. There was a huge loss of manpower, so the other side of the war still had advantage. It was a do-or-die situation. People became desperate. Anything that sounds remotely plausible was given a shot. A second research team was employed to produce a counter the virus. How they do it does not matter, as long as it works; they can make virus-proof barrier, they can come up with an appropriate gene therapy, they can attempt to steal the blueprints of the vaccine, they can create their own vaccine from the samples of virus... Whatever. Anything. Even other experts think up of their own ways. The government had offered an attractive reward to the creator of the most effective virus counter.

I am still thinking of how to conclude the war.

JX Valentine July 8th, 2010 8:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StarBreak (Post 5948063)
You caught your own mistake right there. NPCs are not human; they cannot think for themselves.

Who said it was a mistake? It works like that on a meta level, but if we think on an in-world level, my point still stands. The hero avatar is meant to be this incredible training prodigy who can rise from humble beginnings to defeat all eight gym leaders (which is hinted in canon as not being an easy task for most people, if you ask around Pewter City before hitting Brock), take on not only the Elite Four gauntlet but also the actual champion (the greatest trainer in the region before you come along), and capture the forces of nature/gods of the Pokémon world with very little effort. Sure, it might seem like the game's easy, but that's the point and part of the story.

Not to mention my point was that very few NPCs carry around a full party of six Pokémon. The only ones are either the trainers who overload their team with easy Pokémon (read: Magikarp), the champion, and every Gym Leader or Elite Four member you rechallenge (in Heart Gold/Soul Silver, namely). This implies that a full six-on-six battle is meant to be a special event, not just something that happens ordinarily.

As for your idea, the main problem I can see with it is the fact that a lot of people try to come up with a way to use a plot that eradicates all Pokémon life on the planet... but, well, this is like trying to eradicate a huge percentage of all life on Earth. Unless you set aside a certain percentage of Pokémon that survive (not just legendaries but also Pokémon in general), then you might be able to work out a setting where the ecology isn't ravaged to the point where that other virus isn't needed. (I say "to the point where the other virus isn't needed" because if you screw up a planet's ecology that much, then you're risking making the planet uninhabitable. As in, even if you have real animals in your world, Pokémon are most likely a huge keystone in how the Pokémon world's ecology works. It'd be like taking away all the bees that help pollinate plants, all the spiders that keep the insect population in check, and so on and so forth.)

In other words, a lot of authors try to do this kind of thing (and you can see other pages in this thread for an example), but you've really got to think on broad terms if you do stuff like that -- not just "I have a virus, and it leads to a human-on-human war." Especially given the fact that, with all you're trying to do, that war you're planning probably won't happen in a matter of months. Sure, you can devastate the population of Europe in less than a year (thank you, history), but the genetic research itself will probably take a few years, assuming there's no government-induced setbacks.

Unless, of course, you're thinking about creating Soylent Green with Pokémon. At which point, go for it.

BakingBluePotatoe July 19th, 2010 4:29 PM

One Pokeball and a Hundred Plot Bunnies
 
I have a BIG problem here!

You see, I've been in this fandom for over 3 years now... since the early days, I've seen several plot bunnies form. Thing is, I know I can only write ONE long story (and MAYBE an occasional one-shot) per fandom.


So. One Pokeball, and a hundred plot bunnies! Help me capture the best Plot Bunnie!



1) Based on Pokespe, in terms that only a select few posses a Pokedex. The original Pokespe characters would all be in their twenties and be famous. (moreso than they are already) as well.
It is about a brother-and-sister team. The boy, Hematite, is in a wheelchair, and Garnet, the girl and older sibling, would like Hematite to become a Pokemon Trainer as well. The idea is that a year before the present day, Garnet said she would go on a Journey across Hidem, my made-up region. Hematite is jealous, thinking that just because he's wheelchair-bound he can't ever be a trainer. (Or so says their grandparents, whom they live with.)
What Garnet was really doing, was planning a path for Hematite to be a trainer. On Hematite's 11th birthday, she gives him two Pokemon- a Ponyta (or Rapidash) and a Buizel. Her idea is that Hematite would ride on Ponyta when the Wheelchair is not plausible, and that Buizel would be his Starter.
So basically, Hematite and Garnet would travel around Hidem, with Garnet being Hematie's 24/7 guardian. Oh yeah, and there's probably going to be some crazy take-over-the-world scheme going on. (not sure what or why or how)


2) A more simple story. This one would be based on my adventures in the games, but not necessarily the games themselves. (if you follow) Basically, it would start off Hoenn and then go to Sinnoh, and then Kanto and Johto! (I may or may not include Isshu and future regions... it would sort of depend on where the region is)
Basically, most of the core plot would stay for the most part. However, there will be some twists...
Spoiler:
Such as Momoko (that's my character name in the games) joining Team Magma for a while...
The legendary trio of Hoenn would not be captured by anyone. instead, they would flee to Johto after being battled.
Norman/Senri is NOT Momoko's father. Instead, Mint (who travels with Momoko {also my Character from Emerald}) and Sakura (Mint's older sister) or Norman's daughters.
Brendan/Yuki still remains as he was in RSE.
The Elite 4 and Gym Leaders are set up like they where in Emerald.
Wally/Mitsuru does appear, however, he already got his Pokemon on his own, rather than having to ask Norman/Senri.

Also note, that I would wish to use Japanese names for all characters, locations, and Pokemon. Moves and Items would still use their English names.
Since this is BASED on MY adventure IN the games, the continuity in the games is semi-ignored (Basically, the events of Kanto are never seen, and rather, Momoko would go through the HGSS Version (not the GSC Version), with another rival having been through the original Kanto.)

So basically, what Momoko wants is to be the best damn Dragon-Type Trainer ever. (She Idolizes Clair/Ibuki and Lance/Wataru)



3)........................................................................... eh? really? Ic an't think of anything else?
Oakay, so I guess it's Pokespe/Origional Region Based Fic VS. Modified Game Based Fic!

JX Valentine July 20th, 2010 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Artificial-Insanity (Post 5984326)
1) Based on Pokespe, in terms that only a select few posses a Pokedex. The original Pokespe characters would all be in their twenties and be famous. (moreso than they are already) as well.
It is about a brother-and-sister team. The boy, Hematite, is in a wheelchair, and Garnet, the girl and older sibling, would like Hematite to become a Pokemon Trainer as well. The idea is that a year before the present day, Garnet said she would go on a Journey across Hidem, my made-up region. Hematite is jealous, thinking that just because he's wheelchair-bound he can't ever be a trainer. (Or so says their grandparents, whom they live with.)
What Garnet was really doing, was planning a path for Hematite to be a trainer. On Hematite's 11th birthday, she gives him two Pokemon- a Ponyta (or Rapidash) and a Buizel. Her idea is that Hematite would ride on Ponyta when the Wheelchair is not plausible, and that Buizel would be his Starter.
So basically, Hematite and Garnet would travel around Hidem, with Garnet being Hematie's 24/7 guardian. Oh yeah, and there's probably going to be some crazy take-over-the-world scheme going on. (not sure what or why or how)

I'd say go with this one. It's an idea that isn't basically average new trainer faire, and it deals with subjects that could be potentially interesting. You also have fewer problems with this one than the other one (which I'll get into in a moment). With this idea, though, you'll want to take into consideration two things that you haven't really described above:

1. The fact that Hematite is disabled. A lot of newbie writers tend to give their characters interesting obstacles to face (blindness, psychological disturbances, that sort of thing) but forget to follow through with it. Don't forget that your character ultimately can't walk, and this will most likely end up being a problem later, even if he has a Ponyta. It will probably affect him psychologically (especially since he's been told all his life that he can't do certain things that a lot of other people in the world can) as well as on the obvious physical basis.

Also, try to think about why he's in a wheelchair. Sometimes, being in a wheelchair doesn't just mean not having the ability to walk, depending on the problem that led to the character being put in one. Cerebral palsy isn't the same as paralysis caused by an accident, for example. Either could bring in a whole list of other problems for both the brother and the sister.

In other words, yeah, I know it's one of my most-stressed pieces of advice, but remember to do a bit of research before going into this kind of character. It can be well-done if it keeps in mind that the wheelchair means a whole lot of things to the character.

2. How this relates to Pokespe. Right now, ignoring the part about Hematite's disability, it seems a lot like an average journey. Pokespe, meanwhile, tends to be about kids who are destined to save the world from legendary-related disaster. The journey (badges, ribbons, et cetera) tends to be a side quest, sometimes even explicitly so. (Looking at you, RS arc.) Normally, it's kosher to have a story set in a canon universe, but because this is set in a fan region so far into the future, you'll want to make sure the reader knows that it's not a fic based on the franchise in general but instead one based on a specific universe. You'll probably have to bring in elements of the stories in Pokespe and bring up the characters, depending on how you want to establish the story's setting. (You'll probably end up having to bring in the stories from the canon universe anyway because, heck, they saved the world on multiple occasions.)

Quote:

2) A more simple story. This one would be based on my adventures in the games, but not necessarily the games themselves. (if you follow) Basically, it would start off Hoenn and then go to Sinnoh, and then Kanto and Johto! (I may or may not include Isshu and future regions... it would sort of depend on where the region is)
Basically, most of the core plot would stay for the most part. However, there will be some twists...
Spoiler:
Such as Momoko (that's my character name in the games) joining Team Magma for a while...
The legendary trio of Hoenn would not be captured by anyone. instead, they would flee to Johto after being battled.
Norman/Senri is NOT Momoko's father. Instead, Mint (who travels with Momoko {also my Character from Emerald}) and Sakura (Mint's older sister) or Norman's daughters.
Brendan/Yuki still remains as he was in RSE.
The Elite 4 and Gym Leaders are set up like they where in Emerald.
Wally/Mitsuru does appear, however, he already got his Pokemon on his own, rather than having to ask Norman/Senri.

Also note, that I would wish to use Japanese names for all characters, locations, and Pokemon. Moves and Items would still use their English names.
Since this is BASED on MY adventure IN the games, the continuity in the games is semi-ignored (Basically, the events of Kanto are never seen, and rather, Momoko would go through the HGSS Version (not the GSC Version), with another rival having been through the original Kanto.)

So basically, what Momoko wants is to be the best damn Dragon-Type Trainer ever. (She Idolizes Clair/Ibuki and Lance/Wataru)
I actually have to do this in list format.

1. While you said Isshu's presence in your story is a maybe, never include a region in an upcoming game in a story until more information is known about it. The reason why is because if you know very little about it, you'll end up having to speculate, which means that when the actual games come out, the details in your story (Pokémon in your region, how moves work, what moves each Pokémon will learn, what kinds of places and gyms are across the region, that sort of thing) will probably be all wrong.

2. Unfortunately, while you have the bit in the spoiler tag about Team Magma, the rest seems to be generic new trainer faire. You've got a girl on a journey to become the greatest trainer (even if it's just with Dragon-types... which actually raises a completely new issue I'll get into in a moment). She's probably going to go on a badge quest of some kind, and she has her own generic rival. Not only that, but you've also basically said that this will follow the games. (Only... not?) So, it'll probably be a little less exciting than your first idea because this kind of thing, where the embodiment of the writer's game character sets off across a region to collect badges and go through the basic plot of the games, has happened quite frequently in fanfiction anyway.

3. I can only wonder what kind of starter she'd have, considering Dragon-types are extremely rare. They also tend to suck early on but grow into serious powerhouses (which means you'd probably see her taking on Johto without too much trouble if she's got a Salamence or something), but mostly, they're just intensely rare. Some of them tend to cause the reader to laugh if you bring them out. (For example, if your character starts off with a Dratini she finds in the wild -- especially injured in the wild -- this will probably cause your fic to be considered a parody because so many parodies start off like this anyway.)

4. I cringe a little at the occasional disregarding of canon. I mean, this is either based on the games, or it isn't. And even then, you'll probably run into problems because some readers will expect that certain canon details (like the entirety of the Kanto plot) will pop up when, in your story, they won't. In other words, your trap is the fact that this sounds a lot like standard new trainer faire, and it sounds like you're basing this on the games (sort of). As a result, a reader will end up assuming that they'll be following your character through the basic plots of each region, and when they don't see them, they'll wonder when this story is supposed to take place.

This will probably get even more confusing because of the way the timelines in each of the games work. RBY/FrLg and RSE are set in the same timeline; DP and GSC/HGSS are set in a timeline three years after the first one. In fact, HGSS's Team Rocket subplot happened because of what happened in Kanto three years prior to the game's events. So, to say that Kanto's plot happens at roughly the same time as Johto's just invites a mess because the Team Rocket in Johto don't have a reason to screw around with Magikarp in the Lake of Rage or take over the radio tower in Goldenrod yet.

Not only that, but the bit about Wally seems like there's no reason for it. I mean, the entire point behind why he hangs out with the player character is because he got his first Pokémon with their help thanks to the fact that his family didn't want him to leave home. As in, they thought he was too sickly to go out on a journey, so they wouldn't give him a Pokémon. In the games, at least.

5. There's also no difference between GSC's core plot and HGSS's. The differences between the games are in the features (including where you find Suicune), side plot (like the Safari Zone stuff), and the role of the kimono girls (which seems more like a superficial thing, really). Just so you know.

6. While I have no problem with writers using Japanese names for characters, locations, and Pokémon (and, in fact, one of my favorite fics does this), it really has to be all or nothing for the sake of consistency. As in, it wouldn't make sense to go with Japanese names for three elements of Pokémon canon but English names for the rest. Your readers will probably end up having to look things up anyway because most people don't know every single character's Japanese name. (For example, if I said Mayumi, I'm not sure how many people would know who that was right off the bat. They likewise probably wouldn't know what Hajitsuge or Taneboh were. So, they'll probably have to look those up just as much as they would probably have to look up Kougousei -- or, if I wanted to make things easier, Photosynthesis -- or Orennomi.)

7. Finally, you'll probably have trouble tackling this kind of fic. While it's not unheard-of to create a fic that spans hundreds of chapters and multiple books, keep in mind that to write a good epic like those will usually take years of work.

In short, yeah, you'll probably have less trouble with the first one. Good luck!

pichuspark July 23rd, 2010 9:11 AM

OK, I'm kinda new to the Pokemon fanfic world so I'm just wondering if this idea of mine isn't all boring and stuff...

So, the plot of my story is that there is a Chikorita who is abandoned by her Trainer for unknown reasons. She is then found by a group of Bug and Grass-type Pokemon that call themselves the Bug Brigade, and they promise her that they will return Chikorita to her Trainer if she helps them in their quest to take down Team Rocket, because they think that the humans don't really care about Team Rocket's plans.

Ok, the summary's pretty...bad. That's why I need some ideas :)

Izanagi July 23rd, 2010 5:23 PM

I came up with this off the top of my head a few minutes ago. What do you think?

Senterra
Background
The story begins on a planet called Senterra, which is actually Latin for “Old Earth”. The reason before this naming is because at one point in time, long ago, Earth as we know it was actually the combination of two separate heavenly bodies, one called Vita Corpus (Latin for Magic Body, which became Senterra), and the other, Mors Corpus (Latin for Dead Body, and which is now the Earth we reside on today). When the two worlds were conjoined, civilization thrived on the existence of magic, and magitechnology. Though not everyone could use it, those who could were revered as wise and powerful beings, or Sorcerer, as us Earthbound call them, (Earthbounds being those without magical capabilities). However, some non-magic users began to become jealous of the Sorcerer’s, so, using technology, and machinery to counter their magic, war broke out on Senterra between the Sorcerers and the Earthbound.

The two ended the era of peace, and segregation was born. The two societies were separated. The war, which would be known on Senterra as the “Arcadian Birth War”, went on for many seasons. To end the conflict, both began development on super weapons, which would destroy the other faction. The Earthbound developed the first nuclear weapon with their alliance with science and technology, and the Sorcerer’s began creating a great beast with their alliance with magic. The name of the beast would be known as Ragnapecus, (a combination of the words “Ragnarok”, and “Pecus”, Latin for tamed beast).

The Earthbound launched their nuclear weapon, but it was countered with the release of Ragnapecus, which engulfed the nuke. However, the nuclear radiation spoiled the beast’s radiant shell, turning it into a monstrous demon, known as Ragnafera (Combination of “Ragnarok” and “Fera”, Latin for wild beast). Ragnafera began an uncontrollable rampage, destroying both the forces of the Sorcerer’s and the Earthbound. Desperate to stop Ragnafera, the two came together once more, and decided to separate Senterra into two heavenly bodies instead of one, splitting up Ragnafera’s being with them. The essence of Ragnapecus would reside with the Sorcerer’s, on their world, Pecusterra, and the Earthbound would adopt the destructive Ragnafera, but a concealed form, which would only be released if the wickedness of man reached it’s own. The Earthbound would reside on a body known as Feraterra, but eventually, as the knowledge of their origin on Senterra was lost to the ages, a new name was adopted. Earth.

The Senterrians thrived as a people, and were easily capable of reconstructing their civilizations on a new planet with the use of magic. However, the Feraterrians began civilization over anew as well, but took longer to rebuild their civilizations. However, as the prophecy of Ragnafera had been written, the sin and wickedness on Feraterra eventually began to grow, and it seemed that every time civilization began to prosper, war would only destroy it again, forcing man to begin all over again.

Eventually, the two worlds distanced more and more from one another, until Feraterra, at this point, Earth, completely forgot its origins and the relationship with Pecusterra. It stayed that way for millenniums… but unbeknown to the Earthlings of contemporary days, soon, Ragnafera would be awakened from his slumber on earth, and not even Pecusterra would be safe from its wrath.



I've got another one.

Rise of the Earthbound

Setting and Background
Rise of the Earthbound takes place in an alternate reality of Earth, where back in the time before advanced technology magic and sorcery actually existed and thrived, but with the progression of industry and mechanics, the art of magic was slowly lost and forgotten by all but a few remnants, known as “The Remnants”, respectably.

In the year 2084 the all of civilization was destroyed at the hands of nuclear holocaust caused by the quake of World War III, which would forever be remembered as “The Great War”. Survivors of The Great War scattered throughout the remains of the Earth, and began tribes and packs, and slowly began rebuilding civilization through their own separate means; however, there were two general ways of living. There were those who tried to revive the power of technology and machines, and there were those who tried to revive the far more ancient traditions of utilizing the lost art of magic, which they found possible through the teachings of Remnants, and the discovery of lost remains of magical society, revealed by the removal of such things as certain cities and foundations that took the place of where nature once flourished.

Those who used magic to run their culture were now also called Remnants, and those who tried to use machinery and other related means were referred to as “Machinas”. In order to further emulate the former world before the Great War, the tribes of the Machinas began to converge to form cities and nations. Though things began small, over the course of many decades, centuries even, they began to prove successful. The many cities took the form of steampunk, and eventually they formed a government too. And the government was led by a president, who led the nations through democracy.

The Remnants took a different approach. Their societies remained separated in different tribes and small camps, but they remained connected with one another, and were free to interact with one another through forms of trade and more. They were governed by the “Seven Sages”, elders who were all either original Remnants, or descendants of them. The Seven Sages didn’t truly bare any control, but they were revered and respected for their immense knowledge and wisdom.

Peace, more or less, was maintained for hundreds of years, until the year 567 AGW (which stood for After Great War), when a new president was appointed to lead the Machinas, a man named Alexei Balk, took office. This changed things drastically. Eventually, Balk became more of a dictator than president, and waged war against the Remnants after convincing his people that they were to blame for the collapse of the world and triggering the Great War. Though the Remnants were reluctant to fight back, they eventually had no choice, and a battle that would be remembered as the “Balk War” began. It lasted eight months before the Seven Sages came up with a resolution. Using their magic, the Remnants decided to end the war by raising the continents of their land into the sky, making the homes of the Remnants inaccessible to the Remnants. From then on, the Machinas would be known as the “Earthbound”, and connection between the Remnants and Earthbound ceased from then on.

Konekodemon July 29th, 2010 2:14 AM

InuYasha, Naraku Reborn: Based on the anime. This time things are going to be different. After realizing it was the jewel that was the villian, and it had been controling Naraku all this time, and that his true wish was just to be with Kikyo meaning Naraku was never evil at all Kagome makes a better wish this time. Her wish,"Bring Naraku and Kikyo back to life then disappear forever." Now Naraku gets a second chance at life, to start over a new beginning. And he plans on spending it with the love of his life, Kikyo, who realizes Naraku's feelings and falls head over hills in love, back.

JackGamer August 5th, 2010 6:59 AM

The plot of my fantasy novel.
 
Magink is an incredibly powerful book of spells, for it contains every spell ever written/made. It needs seven keys to open it, which are spread out throughout the land of Farlock. This book was made by the Elders strictly for use in great peril. As the Keys are being gathered by the King for use to control or destory Farlock it's up to a small rebellion to gather the Keys for themselves and destroy Magink once and for all. (It can only be destroyed by reading a spell from the back of the book.)

I know that the plot line is in really simplistic terms, and I'm usually better with my vocabulary, but I'm really tired.

Anyway; what do you guys think of the plot line; that's what I'm asking about?

Cherrim August 5th, 2010 7:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JackGamer (Post 6038345)
Magink is an incredibly powerful book of spells, for it contains every spell ever written/made. It needs seven keys to open it, which are spread out throughout the land of Farlock. This book was made by the Elders strictly for use in great peril. As the Keys are being gathered by the King for use to control or destory Farlock it's up to a small rebellion to gather the Keys for themselves and destroy Magink once and for all. (It can only be destroyed by reading a spell from the back of the book.)

I know that the plot line is in really simplistic terms, and I'm usually better with my vocabulary, but I'm really tired.

Anyway; what do you guys think of the plot line; that's what I'm asking about?

Merged your thread into the plot bunny thread in the writing section.

bobandbill August 5th, 2010 4:43 PM

Hmm this could use some activity. *punts uni away for a bit*
Quote:

Originally Posted by pichuspark (Post 5995829)
OK, I'm kinda new to the Pokemon fanfic world so I'm just wondering if this idea of mine isn't all boring and stuff...

So, the plot of my story is that there is a Chikorita who is abandoned by her Trainer for unknown reasons. She is then found by a group of Bug and Grass-type Pokemon that call themselves the Bug Brigade, and they promise her that they will return Chikorita to her Trainer if she helps them in their quest to take down Team Rocket, because they think that the humans don't really care about Team Rocket's plans.

Ok, the summary's pretty...bad. That's why I need some ideas :)

Well, I guess you should consider why certain things happen - such as why the trainer would abandon a Chikorita (a reputable rare Pokemon, etc). Is it because the trainer is stupid/bad with treating Pokemon right, or did something happen that separated them and the trainer also wants the Chikorita back? That could add some interesting dynamics to the story... I like the idea about Pokemon banding together by themselves to take down TR as well - could make for an interesting story. Might also want to consider in what way is TR being bad (or is this loosely based on GSC/HGSS?) and how they plan to go about stopping whatever it is TR are doing, and what characters make up said Pokemon. I guess simply just expand on it - the basis is certainly promising though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Izanagi (Post 5997094)
I came up with this off the top of my head a few minutes ago. What do you think??
The story begins on a planet called Senterra, which is actually Latin for “Old Earth”. The reason before this naming is because at one point in time, long ago, Earth as we know it was actually the combination of two separate heavenly bodies, one called Vita Corpus (Latin for Magic Body, which became Senterra), and the other, Mors Corpus (Latin for Dead Body, and which is now the Earth we reside on today). When the two worlds were conjoined, civilization thrived on the existence of magic, and magitechnology. Though not everyone could use it, those who could were revered as wise and powerful beings, or Sorcerer, as us Earthbound call them, (Earthbounds being those without magical capabilities). However, some non-magic users began to become jealous of the Sorcerer’s, so, using technology, and machinery to counter their magic, war broke out on Senterra between the Sorcerers and the Earthbound.

The two ended the era of peace, and segregation was born. The two societies were separated. The war, which would be known on Senterra as the “Arcadian Birth War”, went on for many seasons. To end the conflict, both began development on super weapons, which would destroy the other faction. The Earthbound developed the first nuclear weapon with their alliance with science and technology, and the Sorcerer’s began creating a great beast with their alliance with magic. The name of the beast would be known as Ragnapecus, (a combination of the words “Ragnarok”, and “Pecus”, Latin for tamed beast).

The Earthbound launched their nuclear weapon, but it was countered with the release of Ragnapecus, which engulfed the nuke. However, the nuclear radiation spoiled the beast’s radiant shell, turning it into a monstrous demon, known as Ragnafera (Combination of “Ragnarok” and “Fera”, Latin for wild beast). Ragnafera began an uncontrollable rampage, destroying both the forces of the Sorcerer’s and the Earthbound. Desperate to stop Ragnafera, the two came together once more, and decided to separate Senterra into two heavenly bodies instead of one, splitting up Ragnafera’s being with them. The essence of Ragnapecus would reside with the Sorcerer’s, on their world, Pecusterra, and the Earthbound would adopt the destructive Ragnafera, but a concealed form, which would only be released if the wickedness of man reached it’s own. The Earthbound would reside on a body known as Feraterra, but eventually, as the knowledge of their origin on Senterra was lost to the ages, a new name was adopted. Earth.

The Senterrians thrived as a people, and were easily capable of reconstructing their civilizations on a new planet with the use of magic. However, the Feraterrians began civilization over anew as well, but took longer to rebuild their civilizations. However, as the prophecy of Ragnafera had been written, the sin and wickedness on Feraterra eventually began to grow, and it seemed that every time civilization began to prosper, war would only destroy it again, forcing man to begin all over again.

Eventually, the two worlds distanced more and more from one another, until Feraterra, at this point, Earth, completely forgot its origins and the relationship with Pecusterra. It stayed that way for millenniums… but unbeknown to the Earthlings of contemporary days, soon, Ragnafera would be awakened from his slumber on earth, and not even Pecusterra would be safe from its wrath.

Hmm, on the face of it it seems all right - you have the intro set out pretty much it seems - seems to be more an alternate universe as well what with the different planets, etc. Am curious to how it gets awoken and how it is stopped/attempted to be stopped if that is the case. Am also a little bit iffy about how a nuclear weapon turned the summoned beast into a wild one - maybe focus more on magic affecting it or explain how magitechnology makes it 'different'? I can't say I'm an expert on nuclear weapons but I wouldn't imagine the regular kind can do that sort of thing. =p Make sure that much is clear, I suggest.

I like the use of latin naming as well, although this suggests that the anicent cilivisations were Romans or the sort, so is this a name they came up with, or what people on 'earth' later on end up calling it? I guess this also calls into question when does the stuff following the intro occur - present, or future, or just a different Earth completely?

Also 'Earthbound' makes me think of a game 9Mother series, etc). =p

Quote:

I've got another one.Rise of the Earthbound

Setting and Background

Rise of the Earthbound takes place in an alternate reality of Earth, where back in the time before advanced technology magic and sorcery actually existed and thrived, but with the progression of industry and mechanics, the art of magic was slowly lost and forgotten by all but a few remnants, known as “The Remnants”, respectably. [/FONT]

In the year 2084 the all of civilization was destroyed at the hands of nuclear holocaust caused by the quake of World War III, which would forever be remembered as “The Great War”. Survivors of The Great War scattered throughout the remains of the Earth, and began tribes and packs, and slowly began rebuilding civilization through their own separate means; however, there were two general ways of living. There were those who tried to revive the power of technology and machines, and there were those who tried to revive the far more ancient traditions of utilizing the lost art of magic, which they found possible through the teachings of Remnants, and the discovery of lost remains of magical society, revealed by the removal of such things as certain cities and foundations that took the place of where nature once flourished.

Those who used magic to run their culture were now also called Remnants, and those who tried to use machinery and other related means were referred to as “Machinas”. In order to further emulate the former world before the Great War, the tribes of the Machinas began to converge to form cities and nations. Though things began small, over the course of many decades, centuries even, they began to prove successful. The many cities took the form of steampunk, and eventually they formed a government too. And the government was led by a president, who led the nations through democracy.

The Remnants took a different approach. Their societies remained separated in different tribes and small camps, but they remained connected with one another, and were free to interact with one another through forms of trade and more. They were governed by the “Seven Sages”, elders who were all either original Remnants, or descendants of them. The Seven Sages didn’t truly bare any control, but they were revered and respected for their immense knowledge and wisdom.

Peace, more or less, was maintained for hundreds of years, until the year 567 AGW (which stood for After Great War), when a new president was appointed to lead the Machinas, a man named Alexei Balk, took office. This changed things drastically. Eventually, Balk became more of a dictator than president, and waged war against the Remnants after convincing his people that they were to blame for the collapse of the world and triggering the Great War. Though the Remnants were reluctant to fight back, they eventually had no choice, and a battle that would be remembered as the “Balk War” began. It lasted eight months before the Seven Sages came up with a resolution. Using their magic, the Remnants decided to end the war by raising the continents of their land into the sky, making the homes of the Remnants inaccessible to the Remnants. From then on, the Machinas would be known as the “Earthbound”, and connection between the Remnants and Earthbound ceased from then on.
[/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT]
Hmm, post-apocalyptic, I see. Interesting as well, although for instance things to consider is why Balk wanted to invade/wage war with the other country - especially given the GW and what it resulted in - what is his motivation? Want of power, or does he believe his own tales that he told his people? And also is that how the story ends, or is there more to come after that (say those Earthbound people start making flying machines?)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Konekodemon (Post 6014434)
InuYasha, Naraku Reborn: Based on the anime. This time things are going to be different. After realizing it was the jewel that was the villian, and it had been controling Naraku all this time, and that his true wish was just to be with Kikyo meaning Naraku was never evil at all Kagome makes a better wish this time. Her wish,"Bring Naraku and Kikyo back to life then disappear forever." Now Naraku gets a second chance at life, to start over a new beginning. And he plans on spending it with the love of his life, Kikyo, who realizes Naraku's feelings and falls head over hills in love, back.

I have no idea on this fandom, so... can't say much especially as this didn't tell me much about who is who, etc. =/ However I'd note that you'd want to check that this is what these characters would be likely to do (research them, etc) - how is this 'different' from the anime - are the charatcers acting differently, or is it a case of 'what if this event happened like this'?
Quote:

Originally Posted by JackGamer (Post 6038345)
Magink is an incredibly powerful book of spells, for it contains every spell ever written/made. It needs seven keys to open it, which are spread out throughout the land of Farlock. This book was made by the Elders strictly for use in great peril. As the Keys are being gathered by the King for use to control or destory Farlock it's up to a small rebellion to gather the Keys for themselves and destroy Magink once and for all. (It can only be destroyed by reading a spell from the back of the book.)

I know that the plot line is in really simplistic terms, and I'm usually better with my vocabulary, but I'm really tired.

Anyway; what do you guys think of the plot line; that's what I'm asking about?

Simplistic, yes, but hey the basis of many stories tends to be basic. =p I guess just spend time expanding on each part - such as why the king wants to destory Farlock with this book (and how say the rebellion find out about this), what the land of Farlock is like, etc. Also I wonder how people also know that there is a spell to destory the book written in it itself - seems a bit odd, so some thinking about that (and not necessarily much I suppose) may be warrented. The seven keys things sounds like a Plot Coupon *insert warning about tvtropes link here* but that ain't a necessarily bad thing, as long as you keep the story from being a simple 'key get - go to next key - get it - etc' and all. Also reminds me about Deltora Quest there somewhat, heh. Now I;m going to go have nostalgia about that.

Shiny Politoed August 6th, 2010 6:50 PM

alright here i go XD

I've come up with a fan fic idea that My Friends find very interesting this is it

We meet Callum Birch the nephew of professor birch from hoenn,we learn his father was a professor and was killed in a experiment gone wrong so to escape the painful memories the family moves to jhoto.He is at his house in new bark town after defeating all the gyms in Jhoto we are introduced to his twin sisters who are starting there journey and his mom who is traveling to hoenn to meet with old friends and family we then meet all of the family's Pokemon. i don't want to give much away but his sister and his mamoswine are attacked by a vicious larvatar it is defeated and they return to his house professes elm and his family come to greet the family and Elm gives detail to why the larvatar may have attacked but can not come up with a plausible reason.some diolouge happens and his sisters get a pokedex each, and Callum has his upgraded everyone goes there separate ways after Callum Defeats Lyra Elm in a battle he is on his way to the pokemon league

on the way he stops at a small island something happens thats a big part to the story ;) and he meets Agatha and Toby his new friend.after the exciting events they stay at her house over night and leave for the league in the morning. at the mouth of victory road police inform everyone (about 60 people)there were Pokemon in the caves attacking trainers and that only a few days ago a person was killed ,mass hysteria takes place and many aspiring trainers don't take the risk and only about 30 trainers are left then we meet Callum's old friend Gwen a Girl he recently caught up with in blackthorn the 3 of them travel in the cave together (hooray for the cliche traveling trio)stuff happens in the cave i don't want to give away and there out more spoliers and there all in the tournament with the elite four. Callum is up againtest will and as he is about to defeat wills last pkemon there interupted by what everyone thinks is a small earthquake a few moments later a tyranitar breaks through the wall of stadium and starts killing people.

I dont want to give much away for the rest of this but I'll say this they travel and find Callum's sisters stuff gose down in the ice path and they go back to new bark where
professor birch,oak and elm all have some news a virus has infected Pokemon in all four regions .
this virus is the experiment that went wrong and killed callum's father we learn they were trying to make the "Pokerus" virus stronger but it went wrong and was not contained although minor at first,.the virus has spreed and evolved into something worse of the course of 4 years(we learn more about the virus),professor oaks adds an application to all pokedex everywhere by satellite that tracks the 4 stages(you learn all this) of the virus and the strongest readings seems to come from cerulean cave.some epic stuff happens we learn about whats happened and tie up all loose end through out the story.So they have cut of the head of the virus and try to cure those Pokemon already infected.but can they cure them all?

It should be way better once its all written out :P
It rated "R" for blood and gore a lot of it -.-
its horror/adventure/mystery

indinrio August 7th, 2010 4:52 AM

Worlds Beyond
 
Meh, I figure I've lurked long enough, so I'll just get down to penning a short story. But before I fully explain the details of the plot, lemme lapse into a brief spot of excessively foreboding and needlessly dramatic dust-cover prose:

DADADADUMMM

***

The story takes place in the Sinnoh region, but not a Sinnoh region any of us would recognize. For starters, the grand cities of the Pokemon universe – Hearthome, Jubilife, Sunyshore – do not exist here. There are instead huge cathedral-like spires that scatter the landscape, intimidating testaments to the power of the all-mighty Team that built them. There are massive stretches of wasteland, veritable seas of dust and roiling sandstorms interspersed with mercifully untouched swaths of sparking green forest. There are the oppressors, staring at the world with steely eyes through their towering glass balconies, and the resistance, fighting a battle to preserve their homeland against an enemy whose ambitions they hardly even understand.

And throughout this land lives not humans, nor Pokemon, but a combination between the two which either, individually, would regard at best as utterly bizarre.

In this Sinnoh lives the Pokemorphs.

***

There, got that outta my system.

And yeah, there WILL be Pokemorphs in this story. I make no apologies for that. But don't worry - I won't try to explain their existence in this fanfic beyond the simple ditty "they're there because they're there". So no cliched laborotary scenes or weird interspecies... relations. I'll just leave it at that. :P

On to the actual details:

In this story, Team Galactic are the main antagonists. For a while they have known of the presence of dimensions outside the Pokemorph world, and, as is typical for any evil team, are determined to achieve profit from this knowledge. To that end they are constructing a device that will allow linkage to the human and Pokemon worlds.

However, Giratina, one of the legendary trio and a backstage ruler of TG, has a far more sinister hidden motive. He wants to destroy said dimensions using the device, believing that the Pokemorph dimension he singlehandedly created is by far the greatest; his magnum opus. None of the TG execs know about this except for one – a mysterious Infernape, a junior exec yet strangely influential, who appeared under mysterious circumstances and rapidly rose to power.

Dialga and Palkia, realizing the tremendous danger Giratina poses, are desperate to find a way to stop him, as their powers combined are just barely a match for Giratina’s. They conclude that introducing a champion to the dimension, thus giving themselves a clear physical presence on the plane, would be the most effective way to take down TG, allowing them to focus their efforts on bringing down Giratina themselves.
(Each member of the legendary trio is able to physically exist in the dimension, but only for a short period of time. Introducing a champion into the plane is the most effective way to exert control while conserving energy.)

It is under these tumultuous circumstances that a young Turtwig finds himself trapped in this strange alternate-reality Sinnoh. He comes originally from our world, the world exclusively inhabited by the human race, and is both amazed and bewildered by his recognition of the Pokemon traits he sees in his rescuers. But how could that be? After all, those only existed in the diminutive metallic box he often found himself buried in…

Oops, lapsed back into dramatic dust-cover mode again at the end there. Sincerest of apologies. :P

Nothing in this post should be considered part of the actual story; it's more like a preview of things to come.

EDIT: Also, thanks so much to the mods for helping me move this to the appropriate section of the forum. I really should read the rules properly next time... :(

indinrio August 7th, 2010 6:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shiny Politoed (Post 6043907)
alright here i go XD

I've come up with a fan fic idea that My Friends find very interesting this is it

We meet Callum Birch the nephew of professor birch from hoenn,we learn his father was a professor and was killed in a experiment gone wrong so to escape the painful memories the family moves to jhoto.He is at his house in new bark town after defeating all the gyms in Jhoto we are introduced to his twin sisters who are starting there journey and his mom who is traveling to hoenn to meet with old friends and family we then meet all of the family's Pokemon. i don't want to give much away but his sister and his mamoswine are attacked by a vicious larvatar it is defeated and they return to his house professes elm and his family come to greet the family and Elm gives detail to why the larvatar may have attacked but can not come up with a plausible reason.some diolouge happens and his sisters get a pokedex each, and Callum has his upgraded everyone goes there separate ways after Callum Defeats Lyra Elm in a battle he is on his way to the pokemon league

on the way he stops at a small island something happens thats a big part to the story ;) and he meets Agatha and Toby his new friend.after the exciting events they stay at her house over night and leave for the league in the morning. at the mouth of victory road police inform everyone (about 60 people)there were Pokemon in the caves attacking trainers and that only a few days ago a person was killed ,mass hysteria takes place and many aspiring trainers don't take the risk and only about 30 trainers are left then we meet Callum's old friend Gwen a Girl he recently caught up with in blackthorn the 3 of them travel in the cave together (hooray for the cliche traveling trio)stuff happens in the cave i don't want to give away and there out more spoliers and there all in the tournament with the elite four. Callum is up againtest will and as he is about to defeat wills last pkemon there interupted by what everyone thinks is a small earthquake a few moments later a tyranitar breaks through the wall of stadium and starts killing people.

I dont want to give much away for the rest of this but I'll say this they travel and find Callum's sisters stuff gose down in the ice path and they go back to new bark where
professor birch,oak and elm all have some news a virus has infected Pokemon in all four regions .
this virus is the experiment that went wrong and killed callum's father we learn they were trying to make the "Pokerus" virus stronger but it went wrong and was not contained although minor at first,.the virus has spreed and evolved into something worse of the course of 4 years(we learn more about the virus),professor oaks adds an application to all pokedex everywhere by satellite that tracks the 4 stages(you learn all this) of the virus and the strongest readings seems to come from cerulean cave.some epic stuff happens we learn about whats happened and tie up all loose end through out the story.So they have cut of the head of the virus and try to cure those Pokemon already infected.but can they cure them all?

It should be way better once its all written out :P
It rated "R" for blood and gore a lot of it -.-
its horror/adventure/mystery

To be very frank with you, this story sounds pretty much like any typical Journeyfic with some blood and gore thrown in for no real reason other than to make it seem edgier and more mature. You stated yourself in the description that you'll be sticking largely to formula ("hooray for chilche travelling stuff"), but try to avoid that as much as possible; it really turns readers off your story when they know how everything's gonna turn out.

However, that's all I can glean from this brief description. I'm sure, as you are, that the story would look much better written out fully. Your idea of a virus driving Pokemon isn't necessarily unique, but written well it could make for an interesting plot. I would suggest you streamline the overall plot a bit by removing focus from the generic Journeyfic elements and focusing instead on the horror elements of the story, as they would probably strike people as more unique, if nothing else.

And also, one last note: make sure you use proper spelling and grammar in your story. Just spending a few seconds on Spellcheck will make your story look that much more professional.

Shiny Politoed August 8th, 2010 7:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indinrio (Post 6047470)
To be very frank with you, this story sounds pretty much like any typical Journeyfic with some blood and gore thrown in for no real reason other than to make it seem edgier and more mature. You stated yourself in the description that you'll be sticking largely to formula ("hooray for chilche travelling stuff"), but try to avoid that as much as possible; it really turns readers off your story when they know how everything's gonna turn out.

However, that's all I can glean from this brief description. I'm sure, as you are, that the story would look much better written out fully. Your idea of a virus driving Pokemon isn't necessarily unique, but written well it could make for an interesting plot. I would suggest you streamline the overall plot a bit by removing focus from the generic Journeyfic elements and focusing instead on the horror elements of the story, as they would probably strike people as more unique, if nothing else.

And also, one last note: make sure you use proper spelling and grammar in your story. Just spending a few seconds on Spellcheck will make your story look that much more professional.


Yeah I'm not so great with descriptions,Which is why the virus driving Pokemon dose sound overused but they way I've thought it out it quite detailed,as for the cliche journey thing its only the 3 friends traveling.For
spelling and grammar I'll definitely make sure to do that in the future.
Thank you :)

Daydream August 9th, 2010 6:14 AM

The little plot Buneary I've had nagging me has evolved into a fully fledged plot Lopunny that had taking to dancing around my head occasionally with characters following along behind. So I've come here to get feedback on the idea.

---

So the idea is, an alternate universe Pokemon fiction. It's set in a world that is similar our own, except with more advanced technologies that cater to the pokemon and their trainers. Pokemon do replace animals within this world and therefore, most societies choose to find alternate food sources.

In this world, battling is a major televised sport. Trainers partake in official tournaments and battles to receive points and after a certain number of points, the trainer will increase in rank. Due to events of pokemon terrorism in recent years, the government has encouraged the growth of official tournaments, having matches on television almost daily. This, in turn, has created a wealth of young trainers aspiring to reach the coveted Pro rank of the battling tiers.

We're introduced to a young couple, Ethan is a singer in a small-time band and the other, Leon, is an aspiring trainer of the fifth rank. Whilst Ethan watches, Leon battles in the “Psionics Tournament” which will allow him to receive enough points to go up in rank. Leon is declared the winner after a harsh battle for first place. After the tournament, Ethan rushes to congratulate his boyfriend, only to be told by a security guard that he is in talks with the tournament’s organiser.

Three days later, and there’s no sign of Leon anywhere. After reporting it to the police, Ethan is told Leon left the country, just yesterday, on a commercial flight. Originally bewildered, Ethan is convinced something must be up. Determined, he sets out to find his boyfriend.

---

Basically, I need someone to poke holes in this idea so I can address any issues before I really flesh it out.

Edit: Woo, 200th post.

Konekodemon August 12th, 2010 5:25 PM

Pokemon, Shocking Love: This is my fanfic about my two Pichu OCs on my art board. Two Pichus, one abandoned by it's trainer, the other had it's family killed by Pokemon Hunters. What will happen with a shiny female Pichu who had it's family killed by Pokemon Hunters, meets a male Pichu who was abandoned by it's trainer for being weak? For now this is a one shot, unless I come up with some huge ideas.

So for this I need help coming up with a good plot idea.

Yuoaman August 15th, 2010 8:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Konekodemon (Post 6063501)
Pokemon, Shocking Love: This is my fanfic about my two Pichu OCs on my art board. Two Pichus, one abandoned by it's trainer, the other had it's family killed by Pokemon Hunters. What will happen with a shiny female Pichu who had it's family killed by Pokemon Hunters, meets a male Pichu who was abandoned by it's trainer for being weak? For now this is a one shot, unless I come up with some huge ideas.

So for this I need help coming up with a good plot idea.

Well you'll need far more than you gave. Why did the trainer abandon their Pichu? Obviously it's going to be weak, being the first stage of a three-stage Pokemon, and if the trainer has any common sense they'll know this.

And what do you mean by 'Pokemon Hunters'? Are these poachers who take Pokemon from the wild and sell them to the highest bidder? If so, why would they kill two perfectly good Pokemon? Or are they actual hunters, who kill Pokemon for sustenance?

Why does the fact that the second Pichu is shiny have any significance in the story? And where is the plot? Having the relationship between the characters take center stage makes for a weak piece of fiction, you'll need to find some way to inject some conflict.

Neiko Star September 17th, 2010 5:27 PM

I'm a big fan of fantasy and magic, but I can't write them to save my life. >.< The major problem is that it's hard for me to plot my stories out. I have a couple of ideas, but I really don't know what to do with them. I hardly have enough to write a story, but it seems like I'm just too lazy to take the time to plot the whole thing out. I mean, most of my 'idea's are actually just concepts, and I actually have no idea what the main plot or characters are. I don't expect to get a substantial plot out of this, but I'd appreciate it if somebody just gave me a few pointers or recommendations.

Idea #1: The Book of Spells contains spells and incantations. There are 100 pages, and ten spells per page. The Book of Summons contains the list of supernatural creatures you have signed contracts with. You can sign up to 500 contracts. Then there's a third book, a book used to store magical items and such, though I haven't come up with a name for it yet. Each mage starting out will get one spell, one contract and one item. The first space on the first page of every Book is framed with fancy gold curves. That's where they go. The first spell is nearly always unique to the user. The first contract you sign is different than others, because it's a blood contract, so the beast is bound to you for life. Every time you master a spell, it becomes engraved in your Book of Spells. The Books are written in an ancient rune language (haven't found a name yet). Each mage has their own Frequency (not sure about this name either) of Resonance. Resonance is when you pulse your magic through something, and Frequency is like fingerprints of your magic, unique to a single person. The person's Frequency is inscribed in runes on the cover of the Books. Only the user's Frequency can unlock the Books. The Books are white and colourless when you receive them. When you unlock them for the first time, it takes a huge burst of magic. If you manage to unlock them, they'll get their own colour, depending on the branch and type of your magic. It is the goal of each mage to complete their Books. Everybody has their Books, as they are part of one's soul, but not everyone can unlock them. That means only those with a powerful and pure Resonance can become mages. That's pretty much all I have right now.

Ugh, I have to sleep now, I'll post the rest of my ideas tomorrow morning...

Neo Duality September 29th, 2010 7:14 AM

It is the distant future and humanity, who has now colonized multiple planets is struggling for survival as humans and Pokemon unite to fight against a growing alien threat, which is led by an ancient Pokemon. Seven unlikely trainers are conscripted into the army as supersoldiers.

Rated PG-15 for Violence, Blood etc.

What do you think, it's still under dev. etc.

Impo October 23rd, 2010 1:44 AM

i've been thinking about plotting this out for a while,
an action/comedy about ninjas, god knows if i'll finish it, but i hope i do :) .

Plot Summary:
A fourteen year old boy named by the prophecy has come to America in search of two brothers who are needed to prevent the Moritoki Clan from obtaining the key to unlocking the supernatural abilities performed by ninjas. The fourteen year old boy has been trained since birth in the area of ninjitsu, with expertise in Intonjutsu and Bojutsu, as well as being competent in the other sixteen branches of ninjitsu. As most of his life has been spent training to fulfill the prophecy, he has been deprived a free childhood. The boy finds the two brothers he needs to locate, and prepares them for their battle with spiritual, mental and physical training. While the care-free brothers learn responsibility and discipline, the young boy learns how to have a fun and enjoyable life. After the training is complete the three stake out the Moritoki Clan and after a heated battle stop them from obtaining the supernatural abilities.

Of course, a little suspension of disbelief will be needed to overcome the feeling of absence with adults and that the fact the brothers are older than their mentor will be pretty odd. I also plan to make the fourteen year old boy to act like a mentor who gives the cold-shoulder, but as the story progresses he begins to care for his students. Same with the students, I will make them so they act disrespectful to their mentor, are uncooperative, they won't trust their mentor and don't take the ninjitsu to seriously, but then as the story progresses they respect their mentor and have more trust and co-operation.

-

i'm also trying to cover all the emotions and etc for a teenager, as there is the whole puberty thing, and the fact that this is aimed for teenagers, i haven't focused much on adults.

Will94 November 10th, 2010 11:01 PM

Okay I want to do a Fan-Fic which kind of revolves around my save game of Pokemon Pearl, not exactly the same as the game story mind you.
So this kid is turning fifteen, he is getting his Pokemon Lisence... bla bla bla... visits Prof. Rowan... bla bla bla... gets a Turtwig and starts his journey.
Accompanying him is his female friend (I haven't decided if they have known each other since they were young or if they meet for the first time in Prof. Rowans lab). They are together for the entire series (which won't be as big as the Anime!!), which will revolve around a mix of the Games and the Anime.
Anyway they go off on their journey together, his mission is to beat the Elite Four, her mission is to fill up the Pokedex for Prof. Rowan.
They also meet a third companion (who is still in the works. Canon character suggestions are welcome!)
There may also be a rival, and a youngster trainer who meets them along the way but doesn't stay with them

But what I really want to lead this all up to is a bigger story involving Palkia, Dialga and Giratina and the Distortion World. Then Arceus getting starts to get frustrated by Pokemon Trainers, and starts to pull all of the Legendary Pokemon out of their habitats and tries to start a war.
Then after these events the main character continues his journey to the Elite Four, challenges them and then off to.....

What do you think? It is very blan at the moment, and I need to do some serious character building, and episode outlines.

bobandbill November 12th, 2010 3:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Impo (Post 6241097)
i've been thinking about plotting this out for a while,
an action/comedy about ninjas, god knows if i'll finish it, but i hope i do :) .

Plot Summary:
A fourteen year old boy named by the prophecy has come to America in search of two brothers who are needed to prevent the Moritoki Clan from obtaining the key to unlocking the supernatural abilities performed by ninjas. The fourteen year old boy has been trained since birth in the area of ninjitsu, with expertise in Intonjutsu and Bojutsu, as well as being competent in the other sixteen branches of ninjitsu. As most of his life has been spent training to fulfill the prophecy, he has been deprived a free childhood. The boy finds the two brothers he needs to locate, and prepares them for their battle with spiritual, mental and physical training. While the care-free brothers learn responsibility and discipline, the young boy learns how to have a fun and enjoyable life. After the training is complete the three stake out the Moritoki Clan and after a heated battle stop them from obtaining the supernatural abilities.

Of course, a little suspension of disbelief will be needed to overcome the feeling of absence with adults and that the fact the brothers are older than their mentor will be pretty odd. I also plan to make the fourteen year old boy to act like a mentor who gives the cold-shoulder, but as the story progresses he begins to care for his students. Same with the students, I will make them so they act disrespectful to their mentor, are uncooperative, they won't trust their mentor and don't take the ninjitsu to seriously, but then as the story progresses they respect their mentor and have more trust and co-operation.

-

i'm also trying to cover all the emotions and etc for a teenager, as there is the whole puberty thing, and the fact that this is aimed for teenagers, i haven't focused much on adults.

Some focus on the prophecy here would be something to consider as well - where did it come from, and any reason for it to have 'spoken' about these characters in particular? And how does this 14 year old know of the Moritoki clan?

I would also think that if you were to write this (it seems like it has potential) you'd also have to look into ninjitsu fairly extensively for the accuracy (e.g. training techniques, attacks/style the art tends to involve/use... I would also think a suspension of belief may be needed for the bit concerning the key to supernatural abilities - that may need to be particular well-established too - make sure it doesn't seem like a wishy-washy reason for the Moritoki clan to be the 'evil team' or whatnot.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6281503)
Okay I want to do a Fan-Fic which kind of revolves around my save game of Pokemon Pearl, not exactly the same as the game story mind you.
So this kid is turning fifteen, he is getting his Pokemon Lisence... bla bla bla... visits Prof. Rowan... bla bla bla... gets a Turtwig and starts his journey.
Accompanying him is his female friend (I haven't decided if they have known each other since they were young or if they meet for the first time in Prof. Rowans lab). They are together for the entire series (which won't be as big as the Anime!!), which will revolve around a mix of the Games and the Anime.
Anyway they go off on their journey together, his mission is to beat the Elite Four, her mission is to fill up the Pokedex for Prof. Rowan.
They also meet a third companion (who is still in the works. Canon character suggestions are welcome!)
There may also be a rival, and a youngster trainer who meets them along the way but doesn't stay with them

But what I really want to lead this all up to is a bigger story involving Palkia, Dialga and Giratina and the Distortion World. Then Arceus getting starts to get frustrated by Pokemon Trainers, and starts to pull all of the Legendary Pokemon out of their habitats and tries to start a war.
Then after these events the main character continues his journey to the Elite Four, challenges them and then off to.....

What do you think? It is very blan at the moment, and I need to do some serious character building, and episode outlines.

Thing I wouldn't mind knowing about is why the choice for having the character to be 15 years old for starters - are you intending for there to be a romance between him and this 'female friend'? If so be sure to make it realistic - build it up, as a problem for some trainer fics is that said romances don't come off as believeable/rushed.

Be careful too with mixing canons so that nothing contradicts each other, although theere's nothing wrong with doing that, certainly.

Another thing to consider is why is Arceus being frustrated by Pokemon trainers - that would need to be established/expanded upon I feel in the fic (maybe you already thought of that, but idk =p). I'd worry about thinking upon that part of the story - why Arceus tries to 'start a war' and how he goes about with using Pokemon to do that - and how it is stopped (assuming you want it to be stopped that is XD).

Astinus November 12th, 2010 5:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6281503)
Okay I want to do a Fan-Fic which kind of revolves around my save game of Pokemon Pearl, not exactly the same as the game story mind you.
So this kid is turning fifteen, he is getting his Pokemon Lisence... bla bla bla... visits Prof. Rowan... bla bla bla... gets a Turtwig and starts his journey.
Accompanying him is his female friend (I haven't decided if they have known each other since they were young or if they meet for the first time in Prof. Rowans lab). They are together for the entire series (which won't be as big as the Anime!!), which will revolve around a mix of the Games and the Anime.
Anyway they go off on their journey together, his mission is to beat the Elite Four, her mission is to fill up the Pokedex for Prof. Rowan.
They also meet a third companion (who is still in the works. Canon character suggestions are welcome!)
There may also be a rival, and a youngster trainer who meets them along the way but doesn't stay with them

But what I really want to lead this all up to is a bigger story involving Palkia, Dialga and Giratina and the Distortion World. Then Arceus getting starts to get frustrated by Pokemon Trainers, and starts to pull all of the Legendary Pokemon out of their habitats and tries to start a war.
Then after these events the main character continues his journey to the Elite Four, challenges them and then off to.....

What do you think? It is very blan at the moment, and I need to do some serious character building, and episode outlines.

Also, you're going to have to try and make your fanfic different from the games right from the start. Not only by making your character older, but other ways. I'm going to have to agree with bobandbill: why make them older? You have plenty of reasons to choose from, since you are allowed to have older trainers start, but...why? Work it out in the story.

Same with why and how your starting trainer gets involved in this war. And why Arceus is starting a war. What would suddenly make it want to start a war with trainers now, when Arcy has been around since the beginning of time?

I know that right now you only have the bare minimum, so hopefully this helps you out with working more on this story.

Impo November 14th, 2010 2:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobandbill (Post 6283999)
Some focus on the prophecy here would be something to consider as well - where did it come from, and any reason for it to have 'spoken' about these characters in particular? And how does this 14 year old know of the Moritoki clan?

I would also think that if you were to write this (it seems like it has potential) you'd also have to look into ninjitsu fairly extensively for the accuracy (e.g. training techniques, attacks/style the art tends to involve/use... I would also think a suspension of belief may be needed for the bit concerning the key to supernatural abilities - that may need to be particular well-established too - make sure it doesn't seem like a wishy-washy reason for the Moritoki clan to be the 'evil team' or whatnot.


It has potential? Wow, thank you :) .
but I have been pondering over the ideas, and have made some slight changes to the plot, probably resulting in a sequel or two.

The moritoki clan is replaced by just one person, but he pretends to be the protagonists friend and manipulates him into training and finding the supernatural powers (using the prophecy to do so). The reason so he can stop the another evil person wanting to take the powers. but through out his training the protagonist slowly turns evil, and plots to take the powers himself, outsmarting the evil other two. i cant explain it well, but in the story i will.

In the next one it shows how the two other people team up against the 'protangist' and try to steal the powers back. But the protagonist can't control his powers well at the beginning, and the two evil people can now shapeshift into animals, thanks to them kidnapping scientists and making them create a machine that allows their DNA molecules to form those of animals.

i can't explain it well.

Will94 November 16th, 2010 1:02 AM

Thankyou everyone for the replies and the critisism, I will now answer some of your questions.

Question: Why is your character 15?
Answer: Well this is because I would like to have a romance between him and his friend, and I thought back to Ash being 10, and romance doesn't seem as serious, so I thought older. There may be a reason story-wise, like his parents are really protective, or I dunno.

Question: And why Arceus is starting a war?
Answer: I really want to bring Team Galactic into that. With Cyrus wanting to create his own universe, and Arceus feeling that some trainers are no longer placing themselves as equals with Pokemon, but as their masters (which is un-true). I want to bring the Distortion World into it, and at the very end I would like to have Arceus pulling legendary Pokemon out of the real world and into the Distortion World. Remember this is still very early in production and I still have to think up somethings.

I am even thinking of bringing Riley in as the 'Brock' of the series, but I am still debating that too.

bobandbill November 16th, 2010 5:37 AM

Whee quick initial thoughts to idea replies.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Impo (Post 6287514)
It has potential? Wow, thank you :) .
but I have been pondering over the ideas, and have made some slight changes to the plot, probably resulting in a sequel or two.

Be sure you have enough ideas/content to make up a 'sequel or two' then, I suggest. =p

Quote:

The moritoki clan is replaced by just one person, but he pretends to be the protagonists friend and manipulates him into training and finding the supernatural powers (using the prophecy to do so). The reason so he can stop the another evil person wanting to take the powers. but through out his training the protagonist slowly turns evil, and plots to take the powers himself, outsmarting the evil other two. i cant explain it well, but in the story i will.
I'd would suggest having some backstory about these characters would be a potential idea to use then so we know all this (maybe even changing POVs between characters throughout the story?) But some character history and how they know of this power and so forth would be needed methinks (if you haven't already planned that, that is =p).
Quote:

In the next one it shows how the two other people team up against the 'protangist' and try to steal the powers back. But the protagonist can't control his powers well at the beginning, and the two evil people can now shapeshift into animals, thanks to them kidnapping scientists and making them create a machine that allows their DNA molecules to form those of animals.

i can't explain it well.
(So I assume that means the protagonist (or anti hero?) does get the powers then?) You'd need to explain how they can steal the powers off then - is it a spiriatual thing or something like in Avatar, or is it an object that grants the bearer said power? The latter part feels a bit too hard to swallow as well - DNA to shapeshift into animals would likely come off as rather unrealistic no matter how well you protray it due to the very iffy-ness of that nature. I do feel it'd be better sticking to the first one rather than the sequel as the ideas seem too radical/out-of-the-blue in the latter, here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6290976)
Thankyou everyone for the replies and the critisism, I will now answer some of your questions.

Question: Why is your character 15?
Answer: Well this is because I would like to have a romance between him and his friend, and I thought back to Ash being 10, and romance doesn't seem as serious, so I thought older. There may be a reason story-wise, like his parents are really protective, or I dunno.

I guessed as much. I would make sure that the reason for them starting later is well established though as it is often a common complaint people have with such fics - the reason is lame/not well developed enough, and that including the 'protective parents' deal as one would argue that the Pokemon world is quite different to ours which is why the pokemon-world parents allow you to go off and all. (In saying that however [5TH GEN SPOILERS]):
Spoiler:
the father of a rival in B&W does not wish for her to go on her adventure because he fears for her safety and all. Mind you, even if you go down that path, you'd need to back it up and elaborate on it.


Quote:

Question: And why Arceus is starting a war?
Answer: I really want to bring Team Galactic into that. With Cyrus wanting to create his own universe, and Arceus feeling that some trainers are no longer placing themselves as equals with Pokemon, but as their masters (which is un-true). I want to bring the Distortion World into it, and at the very end I would like to have Arceus pulling legendary Pokemon out of the real world and into the Distortion World. Remember this is still very early in production and I still have to think up somethings.
That seems to make sense in part... Cryus certainly isn't a good role-model, although given Arceus' power I would question why he thinks that because of Galactic everyone is like that or why everyone deserves 'punishment' over it via a war (as it would likely impact negatively on everyone), and why he'd want the legendary Pokemon in the distortion world as well (and how they would react to that as well). Maybe try those parts as a focus point if you get stuck in plotting that out?
Quote:

I am even thinking of bringing Riley in as the 'Brock' of the series, but I am still debating that too.
This I would advise again - then you'd be using the all-too-often used forumla of the trainer-fic-with-2-guys-one-girl travelling senerio (and also trying to base the fic too much off of the anime as well), when Riley would likely not fit into this either canonically and so forth. Bunch of issues with that, basically, and I don't see how it'd necessarly add much to the story either.

Impo November 16th, 2010 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobandbill (Post 6291166)
Whee quick initial thoughts to idea replies. Be sure you have enough ideas/content to make up a 'sequel or two' then, I suggest. =p

I'd would suggest having some backstory about these characters would be a potential idea to use then so we know all this (maybe even changing POVs between characters throughout the story?) But some character history and how they know of this power and so forth would be needed methinks (if you haven't already planned that, that is =p).
(So I assume that means the protagonist (or anti hero?) does get the powers then?) You'd need to explain how they can steal the powers off then - is it a spiriatual thing or something like in Avatar, or is it an object that grants the bearer said power? The latter part feels a bit too hard to swallow as well - DNA to shapeshift into animals would likely come off as rather unrealistic no matter how well you protray it due to the very iffy-ness of that nature. I do feel it'd be better sticking to the first one rather than the sequel as the ideas seem too radical/out-of-the-blue in the latter, here.

yeah, i think your right :) .
I've been thinking, maybe the protagonists gets the powers and turns evil,
then his 'mentor' and the other evil person are rivals, working under their boss to deliver him the supernatural powers, and now that the two have failed they have to remove the supernatural powers from him (using an item im creating yet). The 'protagonist' finds the link between the two and finds the boss, battling him and a little more will happen.
I think it gives the storyline more sense, because im making the protganist get kicked out of home, sleeping at the dojo and then the map to an ancient cave is stolen. then the protagonist knows where the lair of the other evil guy is.

Thanks for all your help :) ,
i think i could actually be making some progress :) .

Canine November 18th, 2010 3:59 PM

Hello, I'm a huge fan of writing and this idea has been in my head for a while. I'll just get right to it. Yes, it is Pokemon, but I thrown in a little sic-fi and fantasy since I'll be more comfortable while writing this.

Plot Idea:
This takes place several years after Ash and gang's journey (I'm looking between 30-40 years, I still don't know what roles they'll have). They discovered multiple regions since then, some are high-tech while others are behind in technology. This story takes place in one of the regions that isn't high-tech (I currently don't have a name for it), but the region has a lot of history. (Note: I'll still include some other regions, but I don't want it to become a typical journeyfic.)

A ancient pokemon which has been lost in history except for the people of this region awakens. How? Still not quite sure. However, it's only the spirit/soul of the pokemon, its body is lost. This "spirit" pokemon wants revenge on the pokemon world for destroying and forgetting about it. It is up to trainers from all regions to stop this pokemon and save the pokemon world.
End Plot (for now)

I know it sounds inoriginal, but it'll be different once I write it. So, any help and criticism? Thanks for the help.

bobandbill November 18th, 2010 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Impo (Post 6292739)
yeah, i think your right :) .
I've been thinking, maybe the protagonists gets the powers and turns evil,
then his 'mentor' and the other evil person are rivals, working under their boss to deliver him the supernatural powers, and now that the two have failed they have to remove the supernatural powers from him (using an item im creating yet). The 'protagonist' finds the link between the two and finds the boss, battling him and a little more will happen.
I think it gives the storyline more sense, because im making the protganist get kicked out of home, sleeping at the dojo and then the map to an ancient cave is stolen. then the protagonist knows where the lair of the other evil guy is.

Thanks for all your help :) ,
i think i could actually be making some progress :) .

So you plan to have a boss now? I'll add motivations for the boss to have them do the work for them (instead of doing it himself) would be something to consider. Make sure the 'item' that can remove said super-powers is well established in the story too so it doesn't appear to come out of left field.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Canine (Post 6295321)
Hello, I'm a huge fan of writing and this idea has been in my head for a while. I'll just get right to it. Yes, it is Pokemon, but I thrown in a little sic-fi and fantasy since I'll be more comfortable while writing this.

Plot Idea:
This takes place several years after Ash and gang's journey (I'm looking between 30-40 years, I still don't know what roles they'll have). They discovered multiple regions since then, some are high-tech while others are behind in technology. This story takes place in one of the regions that isn't high-tech (I currently don't have a name for it), but the region has a lot of history. (Note: I'll still include some other regions, but I don't want it to become a typical journeyfic.)

A ancient pokemon which has been lost in history except for the people of this region awakens. How? Still not quite sure. However, it's only the spirit/soul of the pokemon, its body is lost. This "spirit" pokemon wants revenge on the pokemon world for destroying and forgetting about it. It is up to trainers from all regions to stop this pokemon and save the pokemon world.
End Plot (for now)

I know it sounds inoriginal, but it'll be different once I write it. So, any help and criticism? Thanks for the help.

I'd consider then what the charatcers are like as well as their rols 30-40 years in the future, as well as what the did during that time in general (I can't say I know much about the anime characters though as I do not watch it too much, although I know the general stuff). Establishing the region and making sure we know what places look like would be important too as you're using a fan-made region rather than one already existing in canon.

Same goes for this Pokemon - I do wonder about how it was 'destroyed' and how it plans to get its revenge as well - just genral mayhem or using ghostly powers to say possess/hynotise others or whatnot? It does sound interesting though, so if you think up the right stuff for the current gaps from that summary it could go rather well, that fic idea IMO.

Canine November 19th, 2010 10:03 AM

I was thinking last night, since this pokemon doesn't have a body, that it could use powers to possess others. I'm still working out why he wants revenge, I'm working out ideas. I might (keyword: might) also add a sub-plot where he tries to find his body. I'm not 100% sure on that one though.

I might not introduce this bad pokemon for the first chapter or two, that way I can spend a little extra time developing the region, explaining what happened in those 30-40 years, and character development. I'll have hints of his upcoming awakening/return, but not right away. I'm also going to explain why some regions are more high-tech, while others are still medieval-like.

I still not sure what roles the anime characters will play (if any), but I know they'll be mentioned here and there. If they do appear, I'll try to make it related to the story, and not where they just appear out of no where.

Also, in this story, instead of the characters being 10 and such, they'll be 14 (maybe 15). Don't worry, I'll explain why you have to be 14-15 instead of 10. I forgot to mention that in my original post.

IanDonyer November 19th, 2010 11:07 PM

Not quite sure if this is exactly where something like this belongs, but I'll take a shot in the dark here.

Question for you all. What effects do you guys think a Pokemon's attack - specifically Confuse Ray from a weak Pokemon - would have on a human? How long do you think it would take the effects to wear off?

Yes, this is to help with a part of the plot of my current story. Help would be appreciated.

Impo November 19th, 2010 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IanDonyer (Post 6297824)
Not quite sure if this is exactly where something like this belongs, but I'll take a shot in the dark here.

Question for you all. What effects do you guys think a Pokemon's attack - specifically Confuse Ray from a weak Pokemon - would have on a human? How long do you think it would take the effects to wear off?

Yes, this is to help with a part of the plot of my current story. Help would be appreciated.

personally, i think it would depend on who is getting hit.
If you have a psychic trianer compared to a little girl,
the effects would be different. And I would think the effects would be coherent to the intentions of the pokemon attacking, whatever you think should happen :) .

...I hope that makes sense...

AmayaTakahashi November 21st, 2010 11:05 PM

Hey guys!!! Amaya here (But you can call me May, lol)

I'm working on a new FanFic (Prologue is up in fanfic section), But I need some help.

Plot Idea:
Takes place in an imaginary region called Morea
The main character's (Maria's) mom gets kidnapped, and her father dissapears. This takes place a week after one of her long-time childhood friends is kidnapped. She quickly deduces that Team Luna(ris( is optional, but is part of teams whole name)) has taken them because of their trademark "Lunar Beam" Beacon. (Kinda like the Dark Mark, lol. Didn't realise that until now!) She teams up with her friend Jonathan to go save Akira and her parents. But is that exactly what Team Luna had expected?

lol gotta love the drama. This isn't going to be a big Journey-Fic, but I might expnd it over a couple of regions. Tops two plus Morea. Keyword here is TOPS.

Anyway Maria doesn't like being a trainer, but in the Morea region every child has to have at least one year of experience. Her Eevee has become quite bonded to her, and saves her from danger more than once. Her Eevee has almost a psychic nature(hint-hint nudge-nudge on Eeveelution.). In the first chapter (which I have written, but not posted) she and her friend Jonathan are talking to Professor Willow and the radio comes on. But halfway through the announcement Team Luna pre-empts it and gives a threatening warning.

I'm also working on some new Pokemon superstitions(kind of like animal superstitions).

If anyone wants to see the first chapter, or even wants to help me edit, let me know. I don't want to post it until I have at least 99.9% of the kinks out
EDIT: About to be posted! lol! =3

Thanks in advance!!!

P.S. I my use of parentheses bothers you, let me know. I tend to overuse them a little bit.

Will94 November 23rd, 2010 1:18 AM

BobandBill you are amazing!!!
I have ruled Riley out of the story completely, unless I choose for him to make a cameo appearence or whatever. Anyway I have read alot of things about how the trainer got their starter Pokemon, and instead of the whole normal proffesor gives you the pokemon, I have another idea.

So the main character has had a Shinx for some time now (a few years maybe), and they have become close friends already, and completely trust one another. But the main character (I am thinking of calling Vox. What do you think??) has never really wanted to battle for gym badges or the elite four. He has battled the odd trainer and his Shinx is now a Luxio.

So the journey starts when Proffesor Rowan and Lucas are out in the field doing some research or something. Then they are attacked by distraught wild Starly (the reason for them being distraught will be explained later), and Lucas (who has only made a cameo appearence in the anime) fights with his very young Magby (nicknamed Mag), which puts up a good fight until the multiple Starly begin to use Quick Attack simultaneously, when Vox jumps into battle with his Luxio, and they fight off the Starly, who fly away scared.

That is what I have so far, and the battle is the first appearence of thus far named Vox. Then Rowan wants him to do stuff, gives him a Turtwig to help aid him, and sends him off on his journey!

What do you think??

bobandbill November 23rd, 2010 4:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Canine (Post 6296595)
I was thinking last night, since this pokemon doesn't have a body, that it could use powers to possess others. I'm still working out why he wants revenge, I'm working out ideas. I might (keyword: might) also add a sub-plot where he tries to find his body. I'm not 100% sure on that one though.

I might not introduce this bad pokemon for the first chapter or two, that way I can spend a little extra time developing the region, explaining what happened in those 30-40 years, and character development. I'll have hints of his upcoming awakening/return, but not right away. I'm also going to explain why some regions are more high-tech, while others are still medieval-like.

I still not sure what roles the anime characters will play (if any), but I know they'll be mentioned here and there. If they do appear, I'll try to make it related to the story, and not where they just appear out of no where.

Also, in this story, instead of the characters being 10 and such, they'll be 14 (maybe 15). Don't worry, I'll explain why you have to be 14-15 instead of 10. I forgot to mention that in my original post.

Makes sense with waiting to introduce it (unless you wish to do a short prologue hinting at it to grab the reader's attention and make them wonder about it). Seems that you're developing the idea well thus far - good luck with it.
Quote:

Originally Posted by IanDonyer (Post 6297824)
Not quite sure if this is exactly where something like this belongs, but I'll take a shot in the dark here.

Question for you all. What effects do you guys think a Pokemon's attack - specifically Confuse Ray from a weak Pokemon - would have on a human? How long do you think it would take the effects to wear off?

Yes, this is to help with a part of the plot of my current story. Help would be appreciated.

I personally would imagine that the effects would not be much different in terms of how long they last compared to how long they may last for a Pokemon. As for the effects...there's a lot of options with that I suppose - disorientation/dizziness, or unsure what they were trying to do... up to you and would probably depend on the situation as well.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmayaTakahashi (Post 6301430)
Hey guys!!! Amaya here (But you can call me May, lol)

I'm working on a new FanFic (Prologue is up in fanfic section), But I need some help.

Plot Idea:
Takes place in an imaginary region called Morea
The main character's (Maria's) mom gets kidnapped, and her father dissapears. This takes place a week after one of her long-time childhood friends is kidnapped. She quickly deduces that Team Luna(ris( is optional, but is part of teams whole name)) has taken them because of their trademark "Lunar Beam" Beacon. (Kinda like the Dark Mark, lol. Didn't realise that until now!) She teams up with her friend Jonathan to go save Akira and her parents. But is that exactly what Team Luna had expected?

Well as it's a fanmade region be sure that it's well established to begin with, and I suppose some backstory on her parents' relationship with Maria and their 'Lunar Beam' as well would be something to establish - as well as why this Team Luna would want to steal it and all.

Would the police be/have been involved in looking as well? It would strike me as odd if nobody reported these disappearances.
Quote:

Anyway Maria doesn't like being a trainer, but in the Morea region every child has to have at least one year of experience. Her Eevee has become quite bonded to her, and saves her from danger more than once. Her Eevee has almost a psychic nature(hint-hint nudge-nudge on Eeveelution.). In the first chapter (which I have written, but not posted) she and her friend Jonathan are talking to Professor Willow and the radio comes on. But halfway through the announcement Team Luna pre-empts it and gives a threatening warning.
I do wonder why the region has such a rule considering I can't think of any obvious reason (after all every other region does not seem to have such a law.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6303315)
BobandBill you are amazing!!!
I have ruled Riley out of the story completely, unless I choose for him to make a cameo appearence or whatever. Anyway I have read alot of things about how the trainer got their starter Pokemon, and instead of the whole normal proffesor gives you the pokemon, I have another idea.

So the main character has had a Shinx for some time now (a few years maybe), and they have become close friends already, and completely trust one another. But the main character (I am thinking of calling Vox. What do you think??) has never really wanted to battle for gym badges or the elite four. He has battled the odd trainer and his Shinx is now a Luxio.

Makes sense to me - certainly plausible to already have a Pokemon after all. (And the nickname seems fine to me).

Quote:

So the journey starts when Proffesor Rowan and Lucas are out in the field doing some research or something. Then they are attacked by distraught wild Starly (the reason for them being distraught will be explained later), and Lucas (who has only made a cameo appearence in the anime) fights with his very young Magby (nicknamed Mag), which puts up a good fight until the multiple Starly begin to use Quick Attack simultaneously, when Vox jumps into battle with his Luxio, and they fight off the Starly, who fly away scared.
I believe this is as per the D/P/Pt games in part (only the prof is also attacked instead of just the people who find the briefcase are attacked)... I guess also a mix of the RSE games with Birch being attacked. [/musing]

Quote:

That is what I have so far, and the battle is the first appearence of thus far named Vox. Then Rowan wants him to do stuff, gives him a Turtwig to help aid him, and sends him off on his journey!

What do you think??
Seems all right, although you may need to add a bit more as to why Rowan gives him the Turtwig (seeing he already has a Luxio) and what 'stuff' does Rowan want him to do as well (and along with that the motivation for the character to do said stuff.... for instance, Rowan wants some delieveries retrieved or the such making it a job so the character'll get paid for it?)

Will94 November 23rd, 2010 11:53 PM

Thanks so much.
I have started writing the first chapter, and Jason (the mian character, I am making Vox a mysterious Riley/Lance kinda character) has saved Lucas and the professor from the Starly. Anyway I have decided to use Lucas becuase he only appears as a cameo once in the anime, which is in the opening of Giratina and the Sky Warrior, where he is battling Brendan, and is shown to have a Magmortar.
I am playing with this by giving Lucas a Magby to begin with, then we may see it evolve.

Anyway so far I am thinking that Rowan gives Jason the Turtwig to help assist, like Oak gives Red the Bulbasaur in the manga when he already had a Poliwrath or one of its evos.

And yeah, I did base it off D/P/Pt opening, and gave it that tweak I learned was in R/S/E! I haven't played the game except for in school on a ROM a few months ago!!

And I really like the idea of Jason already having the Luxio, it just makes the story start off a little faster, and also I couldn't be bothered to write how they first met and everything, though I may do this at a later time.
Anyway, here is what I have of the first chapter so far, I'll put it in spoilers so I don't annoy anyone!

Spoiler:
001: Just My Luck-xio!
“Lucas! Hurry up ma’ boy!” Professor Rowan yelled out to his assistant, who was running along behind holding all sorts of charts and graphs in his arms. Every step he took he seemed to drop one of the large scrolls onto the ground, where he would stop, pick it up and continue running after the slowly walking professor.
“Ah, yes uh, I’m coming sir!” Lucas yelled back nervously. The two were travelling west across Route 201 from Sandgem town, heading towards Lake Verity.
It was still early morning, around ten o’clock, and the orange light of the rising sun reflected off of the morning dew, slowly dripping from the trees. The wispy clouds were bright pink, and the puddles of water along the trodden track reflected this pink colour.
Rowan and Lucas had been walking for little over an hour, and they expected to reach Lake Verity any minute now. The professor was very interested in Lake Verity, due to the rumour of the legendary Pokemon Mespirit taking refuge here, a rumour the professor believed to be true.
As planned, they arrived not a minute later, looking over a glistening blue lake, completely still but for the leaves dancing across the waters’ surface in the wind.
“Alright Lucas, we can set up here,” The professor calmly ordered, still looking out at the lake. Lucas placed the sheets of paper on the ground, and spread them out across the grass, shining with the morning dew. He placed a rock on each corner of the sheets so to keep them from blowing off in the breeze.
“Do you really think we could see one Professor?” Lucas asked excitedly.
“I am certain about nothing,” he replied, dampening Lucas’s sprit. “But I am certain that they do very much exist.” Lucas smiled, and stood up, too looking out at the mysteriously beautiful lake. “Magnificent, isn’t it!” Rowan spoke calmly. “All of Sinnoh, all of the world is beautiful, but what no one seems to ask, is how was it created.” Rowan now turned to Lucas and smiled.
“And, and you think that they had something to do with the world’s creation?” Lucas conveyed.
“A possibility we are here to research,” Rowan said, walking over to the maps spread over on the ground, viewing the charts. “Today Lucas, is the summer solstice,” Rowan started. “Do you know what that means?”
“Ah,” Lucas thought. “Yes sir! It is the day that the moon is closest to the Earth!” Lucas beamed excitedly.
“Correct, but not my correct answer. Today is also the day that the dimensions of the universe are closest together. And the walls of reality are at its weakest.” Lucas was shocked at the Professors theory, though he surprised Lucas regularly.
“Where Professor, did you learn that?” Lucas asked inquisitively. Rowan smiled and looked at him.
“You are not my first assistant Lucas, but you are my favourite,” Rowan smiled, before looking out at Lake Verity again. He admired the beauty, the calm, and the silence, which was soon broken as loud squawking sounds came from the sky above.
Rowan and Lucas looked above to see a flock of wild Starly diving beak first.
“Professor, look out!” Lucas called as he jumped into Rowan, pushing them both out of the way of the Starly’s attack.
“Starly attacking humans!” Rowan yelled distressed. “This is unheard of!” While Rowan hid behind Lucas, Lucas took a Pokeball from his belt and pressed the button enlarging it.
“Mag! Go!” Lucas threw the Pokeball, which span out at the Starly, hit the ground, opened and bounced back into Lucas’s hand. Where the ball had opened, there was a red light, which morphed into a Magby.
“Magby!” The baby Pokemon cried out.
“Alright Mag, use Ember!” Lucas yelled out to his Pokemon.
“Mag Mag!” Magby opened its’ mouth to reveal a small flickering flame, which then exploded out of it’s snout into the flock of Starly. Most of the bird Pokemon were burnt, and fled, but at least ten still remained. They charged at Magby, who began to panic.
“Magby! Smoke Screen now!” Lucas called out. Magby closed it’s eyes, and then a black plume of smoke erupted from its’ snout, covering Lucas, Rowan and itself. One of the charging Starly stopped and used its’ wings to blow the smoke away into the air, while the rest continued to charge.
‘Magby!” Magby cried in fear, as it closed its’ eyes waiting for the flock of wild Starly to attack. But before they could, a four-legged Pokemon jumped into the battlefield, and from its claws a zap of lightning shot out into the flock of Starly, which were electrocuted into fainting.
“What! What happened?” Lucas said, covering his eyes to protect them from the brightness of the lightning. He turned to see a tall, slim boy with messy brown hair, blue jacket, black shirt and knee length black trousers step out of the tree line.
“Good work Luxio!” The trainer called out to his Pokemon, beaming. One Starly managed to stand up straight again, and proceeded to squawk loudly at the trainer’s Luxio. “We’re not finished yet Luxio. Now! Use Spark!” The trainer threw his arm out in front of him, pointing his index finger at the Starly. His Luxio started to run forward towards the Starly, its claws beginning to create large sparks. As the Starly dived towards the electric Pokemon, the Luxio jumped upwards and expelled a vast amount of electricity from its’ entire body, creating a bright light which Lucas and Rowan had to look away from to shield their eyes.
The Starly’s eyes began to spin in its’ head, then it collapsed to the ground.
“Yeah! Great work Luxio!” The trainer called out to it’s Pokemon, which ran back up to its’ trainer and pounced up into his arms smiling.
“Well, uh, thankyou boy!” Rowan said to the trainer, a little surprised.
“No worries!” The trainer replied. “You were really lucky I was nearby otherwise you guys or your Magby could have been really badly hurt!”
“Mag, Magby,” Magby said from afar, lying on the ground.
“Magby, return!” Lucas said, pointing his Pokeball at the injured Pokemon, which turned into a red energy like light, and flew back into the Pokeball. “I’m Lucas, and this is Professor Rowan. We are scientists from Sandgem Town who have come to study Lake Verity.”
“Yeah, I know who you are. I’m Jason! I’m from Sandgem Town too!” The trainer said beaming. “And this is Luxio, he’s been my pal since I can remember.”
“Luxio!” The Luxio cried happily.
“Are you taking the Gym Challenge, son?” Rowan asked, scratching his white beard.
“No, I’m not,” Jason said looking at his feet. “Me an Luxio are just good pals, nothing else to it.”
“Really!” Rowan said, smiling in thought. “Well then Jason, I have a job you may be interested in, meet me in my laboratory this afternoon.”
“Sure thing!” Jason said, smiling. With that Rowan and Lucas, carrying the scrolls of paper, left Lake Verity and travelled back to Sandgem Town.

I am definately going to go back and fix it up a little, as it is kinda, well, weird. I also want to fix up a bit of the battle scene with some more details. What do you think??

Also the grammar is a little off, so I will go back and tidy that up too!

bobandbill November 24th, 2010 4:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6304981)
Thanks so much.
I have started writing the first chapter, and Jason (the mian character, I am making Vox a mysterious Riley/Lance kinda character) has saved Lucas and the professor from the Starly. Anyway I have decided to use Lucas becuase he only appears as a cameo once in the anime, which is in the opening of Giratina and the Sky Warrior, where he is battling Brendan, and is shown to have a Magmortar.
I am playing with this by giving Lucas a Magby to begin with, then we may see it evolve.

Fair enough - makes sense to give him a Magby (I do not know the anime that much though so I would not know about what Pokemon he may have had in the anime...gam-wise he'd have a starter and a couple of others as well so if you need more you can always look into that).

Quote:

And I really like the idea of Jason already having the Luxio, it just makes the story start off a little faster, and also I couldn't be bothered to write how they first met and everything, though I may do this at a later time.
Anyway, here is what I have of the first chapter so far, I'll put it in spoilers so I don't annoy anyone!
Yeah, it's an acceptable thing to do as long as you handle it correctly. There's no need to explain how he first got it either unless you want to use it as backstory or the such.

Quote:

Spoiler:
001: Just My Luck-xio!
“Lucas! Hurry up ma’ boy!” Professor Rowan yelled out to his assistant, who was running along behind holding all sorts of charts and graphs in his arms. Every step he took he seemed to drop one of the large scrolls onto the ground, where he would stop, pick it up and continue running after the slowly walking professor.
“Ah, yes uh, I’m coming sir!” Lucas yelled back nervously. The two were travelling west across Route 201 from Sandgem town, heading towards Lake Verity.
It was still early morning, around ten o’clock, and the orange light of the rising sun reflected off of the morning dew, slowly dripping from the trees. The wispy clouds were bright pink, and the puddles of water along the trodden track reflected this pink colour.
Rowan and Lucas had been walking for little over an hour, and they expected to reach Lake Verity any minute now. The professor was very interested in Lake Verity, due to the rumour of the legendary Pokemon Mespirit taking refuge here, a rumour the professor believed to be true.
As planned, they arrived not a minute later, looking over a glistening blue lake, completely still but for the leaves dancing across the waters’ surface in the wind.
“Alright Lucas, we can set up here,” The professor calmly ordered, still looking out at the lake. Lucas placed the sheets of paper on the ground, and spread them out across the grass, shining with the morning dew. He placed a rock on each corner of the sheets so to keep them from blowing off in the breeze.
“Do you really think we could see one, Professor?” Lucas asked excitedly.
“I am certain about nothing,” he replied, dampening Lucas’s sprit. “But I am certain that they do very much exist.” Lucas smiled, and stood up, too looking out at the mysteriously beautiful lake. “Magnificent, isn’t it!” Rowan spoke calmly. “All of Sinnoh, all of the world is beautiful, but what no one seems to ask, is how was it created.” Rowan now turned to Lucas and smiled.
“And, and you think that they had something to do with the world’s creation?” Lucas conveyed.
“A possibility we are here to research,” Rowan said, walking over to the maps spread over on the ground, viewing the charts. “Today Lucas, is the summer solstice,” Rowan started. “Do you know what that means?”
“Ah,” Lucas thought. “Yes sir! It is the day that the moon is closest to the Earth!” Lucas beamed excitedly.
“Correct, but not my correct answer. Today is also the day that the dimensions of the universe are closest together. And the walls of reality are at its weakest.” Lucas was shocked at the Professors theory, though he surprised Lucas regularly.
“Where Professor, did you learn that?” Lucas asked inquisitively. Rowan smiled and looked at him.
“You are not my first assistant Lucas, but you are my favourite,” Rowan smiled, before looking out at Lake Verity again. He admired the beauty, the calm, and the silence, which was soon broken as loud squawking sounds came from the sky above.
Rowan and Lucas looked above to see a flock of wild Starly diving beak first.
“Professor, look out!” Lucas called as he jumped into Rowan, pushing them both out of the way of the Starly’s attack.
“Starly attacking humans!” Rowan yelled distressed. “This is unheard of!” While Rowan hid behind Lucas, Lucas took a Pokeball from his belt and pressed the button enlarging it.
“Mag! Go!” Lucas threw the Pokeball, which span out at the Starly, hit the ground, opened and bounced back into Lucas’s hand. Where the ball had opened, there was a red light, which morphed into a Magby.
“Magby!” The baby Pokemon cried out.
“Alright Mag, use Ember!” Lucas yelled out to his Pokemon.
“Mag Mag!” Magby opened its’ mouth to reveal a small flickering flame, which then exploded out of it’s snout into the flock of Starly. Most of the bird Pokemon were burnt, and fled, but at least ten still remained. They charged at Magby, who began to panic.
“Magby! Smoke Screen now!” Lucas called out. Magby closed it’s eyes, and then a black plume of smoke erupted from its’ snout, covering Lucas, Rowan and itself. One of the charging Starly stopped and used its’ wings to blow the smoke away into the air, while the rest continued to charge.
‘Magby!” Magby cried in fear, as it closed its’ eyes waiting for the flock of wild Starly to attack. But before they could, a four-legged Pokemon jumped into the battlefield, and from its claws a zap of lightning shot out into the flock of Starly, which were electrocuted into fainting.
“What! What happened?” Lucas said, covering his eyes to protect them from the brightness of the lightning. He turned to see a tall, slim boy with messy brown hair, blue jacket, black shirt and knee length black trousers step out of the tree line.
“Good work, Luxio!” The trainer called out to his Pokemon, beaming. One Starly managed to stand up straight again, and proceeded to squawk loudly at the trainer’s Luxio. “We’re not finished yet, Luxio. Now! Use Spark!” The trainer threw his arm out in front of him, pointing his index finger at the Starly. His Luxio started to run forward towards the Starly, its claws beginning to create large sparks. As the Starly dived towards the electric Pokemon, the Luxio jumped upwards and expelled a vast amount of electricity from its’ entire body, creating a bright light which Lucas and Rowan had to look away from to shield their eyes.
The Starly’s eyes began to spin in its’ head, then it collapsed to the ground.
“Yeah! Great work, Luxio!” The trainer called out to it’s Pokemon, which ran back up to its’ trainer and pounced up into his arms smiling.
“Well, uh, thankyou boy!” Rowan said to the trainer, a little surprised.
“No worries!” The trainer replied. “You were really lucky I was nearby otherwise you guys or your Magby could have been really badly hurt!”
“Mag, Magby,” Magby said from afar, lying on the ground.
“Magby, return!” Lucas said, pointing his Pokeball at the injured Pokemon, which turned into a red energy like light, and flew back into the Pokeball. “I’m Lucas, and this is Professor Rowan. We are scientists from Sandgem Town who have come to study Lake Verity.”
“Yeah, I know who you are. I’m Jason! I’m from Sandgem Town too!” The trainer said beaming. “And this is Luxio, he’s been my pal since I can remember.”
“Luxio!” The Luxio cried happily.
“Are you taking the Gym Challenge, son?” Rowan asked, scratching his white beard.
“No, I’m not,” Jason said looking at his feet. “Me an Luxio are just good pals, nothing else to it.”
“Really!” Rowan said, smiling in thought. “Well then Jason, I have a job you may be interested in, meet me in my laboratory this afternoon.”
“Sure thing!” Jason said, smiling. With that Rowan and Lucas, carrying the scrolls of paper, left Lake Verity and travelled back to Sandgem Town.

I am definately going to go back and fix it up a little, as it is kinda, well, weird. I also want to fix up a bit of the battle scene with some more details. What do you think??

Also the grammar is a little off, so I will go back and tidy that up too!
Well I bolded/underlined stuff that needs changing after a brief glance (e.g. it's to its in cases, or 'The' after dialogue should be 'the' as it flows on from the dialogue, hence it ought to be treated as a whole sentence with the dialogue rather than separate sentences), or adding in (e.g. commas before names). Overall it seems like a decent start, and editing would help it further too, IMO.

Will94 November 24th, 2010 11:55 AM

Yeah, with the lower case/upper case after dialogue, I knew this was right,
"Don't blink. Blink and you're dead," the Doctor yelled.
But I wasn't sure about this,
"Don't blink! Blink and you're dead!" the Doctor yelled.
I got confused because of the exlamation mark, and I thought it would end the sentence, so thanks for that.
Otherwise I am really good with grammar, apart from the little stuff ups and typos I get from rushing and not paying attention!!!
Again, thank you so much!! I will write more and let you know what I am up to.

AmayaTakahashi November 24th, 2010 2:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobandbill (Post 6304327)
Well as it's a fanmade region be sure that it's well established to begin with, and I suppose some backstory on her parents' relationship with Maria and their 'Lunar Beam' as well would be something to establish - as well as why this Team Luna would want to steal it and all.

Would the police be/have been involved in looking as well? It would strike me as odd if nobody reported these disappearances.
I do wonder why the region has such a rule considering I can't think of any obvious reason (after all every other region does not seem to have such a law.

:) Thanks for the help!!!!!! Actually, I guess I didn't make this clear enough ( lol my fault, no one elses. Looking back at it confuses me too.) but Team Luna uses "Lunar Beam" around a certain area after they commit a crime.

The police do get involved, but it's gonna be a power struggle thing like with team Rocket, other than the "Lunar Beam" beacon, they have no proof it was Team Luna. The move is open for circulation WAYYY before Team Luna started using it, but certain rare TM stores and certain Pokemon have the natural ability to learn it (i.e. Lunatone, Clefairy, etc). Also Team Luna's version is slightly altered to where it will be visible for a long time afterwards (As opposed to a few minutes), up to all night.

And as for the law concerning the training, almost everyone in the Morea region has a job concerned with Pokemon. It's kind of a mastery of the subject kind of thing. I might change it to where her father is "making" her train Pokemon for her own safety or something like that.

Thanks again!

Amaya

Hitoshizuku November 25th, 2010 7:58 PM

Pokemon Battle Royale?
 
Hey guys, so I've been batting around this rather persistent plot bunny for a while. Though I don't have much confidence in my ability to pull off something this dark, I was thinking of doing a Pokemon fic based loosely on the classic Battle Royale setup. I feel like something similar has probably been done before, maybe even as a RP, but if not, my premise is as follows:

In order the find the "greatest trainer of all," mysterious Legendaries trainer Takuto has extended an open challenge to trainers from all over the world, inviting them to an isolated island to take part in a massive competition. It quickly becomes clear, however, that this isn't your normal tournament (cue sinister music).

I haven’t figured out all the rules yet, but this is what I have so far.
  • At the start of the competition, each trainer gets one, and only one, PokeBall containing a random "starter" Pokemon (either completely random or perhaps belonging to any of the other trainers in the competition...haven't decided yet).
  • If a trainer tries to leave the island/enter certain restricted zones, OR if their "starter" Pokemon faints, they automatically die (via the quintessential Battle Royale exploding collars).
  • The only way to add more Pokemon to your roster, unfortunately, is to kill other trainers and take theirs, though there may be some exceptions.
  • Trainers also have to survive in the island wilderness, which is filled with wild Pokemon and prone to "natural" disasters.
  • The competition ends when there is only one trainer left standing (if there isn't a single winner by the end of a certain time period, everyone may automatically die).
I’m also thinking about having a sizable subplot where individuals who didn’t enter the competition (possibly headed by Gary Oak…though I can’t decide if I’d prefer to have him to compete or not) are trying to figure out who “Takuto” really is and ultimately attempt to save the people on the island.

At any rate, I am thinking to use largely canon anime characters for this, probably several years into the future (one of the protagonists, May's little brother Max, is a beginning trainer at this point). I have a couple ideas for who I might include, but not nearly enough for the loads and loads of characters I'm planning for. So I was wondering if anyone had any opinions on:
  • Which characters do you think would be interesting to see as competitors?/What pokemon would be interesting for them to get as their "starter"? (someone’s definitely ending up with Magikarp fyi)
  • What reactions/hidden abilities/personality traits/backstories might emerge from these characters in life and death situations?
  • What kind of alliances/grudges/goals do you think might come into play?
  • How might certain characters end up getting killed off/killing others off?

    etc.
Whew, okay. Hope no one thinks I'm an ax-crazy creep now. ^^;

Eliminator Jr. November 25th, 2010 9:28 PM

If you really wanted to spice it up you could give all the trainers different languages so the protagonist can only communicate with a few of the trainers that share his language. Could make things interesting if hand gestures and body language are misinterpreted. However, with languages you've got more room to play around with alliances and deception.

About the Magikarp thing - if you've got multiple points of view, you could get the trainer with the Magikarp to spend the first half of the contest trying to hide from the other players, and you could include encounters where he is almost found out by other trainers (that is until he gets Gyarados and goes crazy). But yeah, I'd like to see the Magikarp guy play it smart rather than just going "oh damn, I've got a Magikarp, now I'm going to lose".

But yeah, this reminds me a lot of a book called Contest by Matthew Reilly, where basically all the intelligent races of the universe every however many years have a massive contest where one member of each race is placed inside a maze and have to be the last one standing. This time they decide to include humans as a joke (because basically humans aren't anywhere near as advanced) and the maze is the New York State Library. But yeah, the story basically follows the main guy around as he tries to protect his daughter at the same time and it's really interesting.

Good luck writing it anyway, it sounds like it'll be a ripper.

Will94 November 26th, 2010 2:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmayaTakahashi (Post 6306033)
:) Thanks for the help!!!!!! Actually, I guess I didn't make this clear enough ( lol my fault, no one elses. Looking back at it confuses me too.) but Team Luna uses "Lunar Beam" around a certain area after they commit a crime.

The police do get involved, but it's gonna be a power struggle thing like with team Rocket, other than the "Lunar Beam" beacon, they have no proof it was Team Luna. The move is open for circulation WAYYY before Team Luna started using it, but certain rare TM stores and certain Pokemon have the natural ability to learn it (i.e. Lunatone, Clefairy, etc). Also Team Luna's version is slightly altered to where it will be visible for a long time afterwards (As opposed to a few minutes), up to all night.

And as for the law concerning the training, almost everyone in the Morea region has a job concerned with Pokemon. It's kind of a mastery of the subject kind of thing. I might change it to where her father is "making" her train Pokemon for her own safety or something like that.

Thanks again!

Amaya

Does the Lunar Beam idea have anything to do with the Dark Mark from Harry Potter? If not, then ignore me!! XD

bobandbill November 26th, 2010 2:37 AM

@ Hitoshizuku - merged your thread with the Plot Bunny thread as asking for opinions on ideas and whatnot comes under this. =p

Anyways it is an interesting idea - you'd need to set up Takuto some as to why he'd want to set up such a challenge/trap in the first place though, certainly (unless you want to keep it all in the dark), and how he'd monitor everyone and all too (I imagine 'collars' would not necessarily be enough... and what happens to said collar if removed, or if they're on a Pokemon too and they evolve?
Quote:

What reactions/hidden abilities/personality traits/backstories might emerge from these characters in life and death situations?
The Pokemon world seems quite against the killing of trainers by nature, so I imagine hardly anyone would find themselves enjoying it or for the whole challenge thing. =p (After all, Pokemon only ever 'faint' in battles to boot). As for training the new Pokemon, I'd think maybe recalling past experiences might come in handy and could be something to refer to if you wish?

Overall does sound promising!

Hitoshizuku November 26th, 2010 8:15 PM

@ Eliminator Jr.
The language idea sounds pretty cool! Not sure if I've seen different languages used in the anime at all, but maybe even a secret code or some sort might be useful?

Yes, the Magikarp guy is definitely putting up a fight! (in the original "Battle Royale" movie, I think the winning characters initially got "useless" weapons, e.g. a pot lid and binoculars while other people were getting axes and guns) But yes, there should definitely be trainers that will be playing it smart rather than all out offensively; I'm thinking another guy is going to have an Abra that only knows Teleport. So many possibilities...

Ooh, thanks for the book rec. That sounds really interesting. Have you heard of the "Hunger Games" at all, by any chance?

@ bobandbill
Oops, sorry about putting this the wrong place! ^^; I did see other plot idea type threads in the main Writer's Lounge section, though (e.g. "Flying Girl Rainbow Wing," "Unknown writing story," "Lilly's Story," etc.), and I'm a bit confused about how mine was different from those. In general, how should I determine where to post this kind of stuff in the future?

Haha, yes, Takuto is most definitely in the dark. He doesn't have much backstory in the anime, so I'm going to be taking free reign with that (evil smile). As for the collars, they explode if you try to take them off, and they have some sort of audio/tracking monitor system that I will have to look more into. ^^; Not sure how I'm gonna handle Pokemon evolving, though. Uh...magic! (haha)

Yeah, I don't think anyone in the happy G-rated world that is the Pokemon anime would take well to this at all, not without some serious trauma (which is part of the reason I feel this idea would be difficult to pull off well -_-). I guess one of the points of the original "Battle Royale" was that ordinary high schoolers could become killers under the pressure of life and death situations, so I'm looking for ways to make the Pokemon chars crack as well...hope that doesn't make me sound too evil. ^^;

bobandbill November 26th, 2010 10:12 PM

Quote:

Oops, sorry about putting this the wrong place! ^^; I did see other plot idea type threads in the main Writer's Lounge section, though (e.g. "Flying Girl Rainbow Wing," "Unknown writing story," "Lilly's Story," etc.), and I'm a bit confused about how mine was different from those. In general, how should I determine where to post this kind of stuff in the future?
No problem. And I guess they never got merged, is all, or didn't quite fit. I guess though if you want advice or thoughts, etc on a plot idea it'd go here, and if it's say a preview of a fic (along with possible snippet of fic) or just a question in general to do with fics in some way then it can have its own thread.
Quote:

Haha, yes, Takuto is most definitely in the dark. He doesn't have much backstory in the anime, so I'm going to be taking free reign with that (evil smile). As for the collars, they explode if you try to take them off, and they have some sort of audio/tracking monitor system that I will have to look more into. ^^; Not sure how I'm gonna handle Pokemon evolving, though. Uh...magic! (haha)
Hmm - maybe using a Pokemon to track them would be something to consider? Seeing Takuto has canonically a couple of legendaries as well that could possibly come in useful for that (including a Psychic type)...

AmayaTakahashi November 27th, 2010 12:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will94 (Post 6308859)
Does the Lunar Beam idea have anything to do with the Dark Mark from Harry Potter? If not, then ignore me!! XD


Eh, I didn't realise it was like that until after I typed my first post. Initially, no, but I guess in a way it is! lol

XD

Amaya

Canine November 29th, 2010 2:52 PM

I have a new idea that I got a few days ago. It's based off the seven deadly sins. Most of the same stuff stays the same, but there are a few differences.

Plot Idea
This story takes place 30 years after Ash's journey. After finishing his Unova/Isshu journey, he disappeared, leading some to think he was dead. Since then, a few new regions has been discovered, each with its own lifestyle. This story takes place on one of these new regions, Kochi.

Due to its isolation from the rest of the regions, Kochi has a unique lifestyle. It isn't very high-tech and the region still lives off it's history and superstitions. Kochi is also home to the Deadly Sins Pokemon; the story goes...before humans walked this earth, the Deadly Sins Pokemon was seven pokemon that tried to overthrow Arceus, but they failed. Arceus took their souls away and hid their bodies so they can never be found. But its only a story, right?

These pokemon (or their souls at least) is awakened, and they decide to do what they attempted before they were destroyed, overthrow Arceus and take control of the pokemon world. Each pokemon represents something different: wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony.

It's up to trainers from around the regions to save the world from these pokemons. Will they succeed or fail miserably?
End Plot

I don't know, I don't think the seven deadly sins have been done before. It'll be interesting to see how I can work this out. What do you guys think?

Astinus November 30th, 2010 12:02 PM

Well, my first question is what does Ash have to do with it? Normally when Ash is mentioned as being disappeared, the fic has either the plot or subplot of trying to find him. I know that you're just setting up the timeline for your fic, but if Ash isn't really a part of your fic, then why mention him?

I haven't seen the seven deadly sins done in Pokemon fanfiction, but even if it was, you'll be writing an entirely different story compared to others who have done it before, so don't really worry too much about that.

It'll be interesting to see why trainers from all over the world need to come to Kochi to save it. I'm not sure if you already have characters and where they're from set in your mind, so can't really comment much on the characters.

Are you going to have a lot of fakemon in your story? Since Kochi is separated that much from the rest of the world that they're behind in technology and other things, I'd figure that they'd not have much of the same Pokemon as other regions. Kind of like how Unova is.

I love stories dealing with the Seven Deadly Sins, so I'd like to know more about this and what you have planned.

Canine December 1st, 2010 9:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Astinus (Post 6317283)
Well, my first question is what does Ash have to do with it? Normally when Ash is mentioned as being disappeared, the fic has either the plot or subplot of trying to find him. I know that you're just setting up the timeline for your fic, but if Ash isn't really a part of your fic, then why mention him?

I haven't seen the seven deadly sins done in Pokemon fanfiction, but even if it was, you'll be writing an entirely different story compared to others who have done it before, so don't really worry too much about that.

It'll be interesting to see why trainers from all over the world need to come to Kochi to save it. I'm not sure if you already have characters and where they're from set in your mind, so can't really comment much on the characters.

Are you going to have a lot of fakemon in your story? Since Kochi is separated that much from the rest of the world that they're behind in technology and other things, I'd figure that they'd not have much of the same Pokemon as other regions. Kind of like how Unova is.

I love stories dealing with the Seven Deadly Sins, so I'd like to know more about this and what you have planned.

I don't think I'll add Ash or any anime characters. I was just setting up the timeline, I don't think I'll mention any of them in the fic.

I was just making sure I wasn't "ripping off" anyone. I didn't think the Seven Deadly Sins have been done, but I was just checking.

I have a few characters made, but only the main characters (or most of the main characters). I'm still trying to figure out how the other regions will play into the story.

I want to have fakemon in this story, but it depends if I can figure out the names of them. I'm really bad at thinking of names for pokemon.

I've been obsessed with the Seven Deadly Sins lately, and I got this idea across the weekend.

Bay December 1st, 2010 10:03 AM

I'll have to go with Astinus on the mentioning Ash part. When you mention him, then that means you're going to have your story set in anime canon, which is quite different from game canon. You can still have your story set long after Ash's journey at Isshu/Unova is finished, but if Ash won't be referenced or be featured, it's best not to mentioned Ash's disappearance.

Other than that, very interesting premise. Don't think I seen the deadly sins being used in Pokemon, so it's would be very interesting how that will play out. If you can't think of some fakemon for the deadly sins, you can maybe still have some of the legendaries be them. I mean, if going by anime canon, the Orange Islands have their own myths of Lugia different from the people of Johto, so it's possible.

Giratina ♀ December 2nd, 2010 12:49 PM

Indeed. Perhaps when we learn the English names of the Unova (ugh) protagonists, you can use them as a baseline... or just remove that part entirely and just state that it happens in the far future. Either one would work just as good as Ash Ketchum, and in my experience, the less tethering you do to one timeline, the better. At least the game canon is a little more open.

I don't believe I've ever seen the Deadly Sins as physical Pokémon before. (Admittedly I have assigned a Deadly Sin to each of my fake Gym Leaders, which is why I can't use "in fanfic", but that was just for fun and I don't intend to mention that in the story itself. So yeah. XD) It would certainly be fun to watch - for me, at least, who finds that sort of thing very interesting. c:

Spinor December 7th, 2010 9:31 AM

I don't want to give out to much, but I have a sort of story I want to see I can exercise.

It all started with Dragons, Iris (Pokemon Anime), and Relatives. From there, I spun out a conflict between two sisters related to Iris fighting each other for a sort of power as Dragon Warriors. I subdivided the action into 4 parts, an introduction, Iris's story, a journey to find hidden objects, and the final conflict.

The names of the sisters I believe would be Veronica and Haemona. Them and Iris descend from an ancient civilization/specie of human called The People of the Dragons. After some legends which I'm still working on, Veronica and Haemona will conflict. Iris will also play an important role here. I think it'd probably be sort of violent.

Anyways, I'm not new to writing, it's just time management that I need to adjust. But I feel like I can probably develop enough from this.

Bay December 7th, 2010 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AdvancedK47 (Post 6329329)
I don't want to give out to much, but I have a sort of story I want to see I can exercise.

It all started with Dragons, Iris (Pokemon Anime), and Relatives. From there, I spun out a conflict between two sisters related to Iris fighting each other for a sort of power as Dragon Warriors. I subdivided the action into 4 parts, an introduction, Iris's story, a journey to find hidden objects, and the final conflict.

The names of the sisters I believe would be Veronica and Haemona. Them and Iris descend from an ancient civilization/specie of human called The People of the Dragons. After some legends which I'm still working on, Veronica and Haemona will conflict. Iris will also play an important role here. I think it'd probably be sort of violent.

Anyways, I'm not new to writing, it's just time management that I need to adjust. But I feel like I can probably develop enough from this.

Real quick, when you say "two sisters related to Iris," you mean those sisters are Iris' cousins, or the three of them are siblings? Just want to make sure.

Anyways, this sounds interesting. Am curious though what does the title Dragon Warrior means and also what the hidden objects have to do with the plot. Perhaps those objects needed to be found in order to be a Dragon Warrior?

Spinor December 10th, 2010 1:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bay Alexison (Post 6329484)
Real quick, when you say "two sisters related to Iris," you mean those sisters are Iris' cousins, or the three of them are siblings? Just want to make sure.

Anyways, this sounds interesting. Am curious though what does the title Dragon Warrior means and also what the hidden objects have to do with the plot. Perhaps those objects needed to be found in order to be a Dragon Warrior?

I want to say cousins, but I decided to set up the family tree for Iris to be a sort of 2nd Aunt.

That might be the case~ I'm developing each story sub-plot and events bit by bit.

Also, would it be a good tactic to write out many chapters to wait for review and release, or is it better to remain classical and review/release after you finish writing each chapter?

Neiko Star December 10th, 2010 3:36 PM

Anybody have any suggestions about my idea?

Giratina ♀ December 10th, 2010 4:04 PM

Advance, I've heard of a certain fanficiton writer putting her entire story onto paper, rewriting it, and then posting the chapters, and it turned out to be a fantastic read. But not everyone can even do that (I've tried and failed). Writing a bunch is good because you can go back and edit inconsistencies, but one at a time is better for those of us who really can't stand big documents, or keeping content from the readers. It depends on what you feel like doing.

Neiko Star, could you perhaps quote your idea? It would be much easier to rate if we don't need to sift through pages. c:

bobandbill December 10th, 2010 4:35 PM

Indeed - there are advantages and disadvantages to either posting as you write something or writing it all before getting to posting. If the former, having some idea as to how the rest of the story will pan out may be useful so you avoid potential plotholes and whatnot, , but if you (or a reviewer) points out a problem that would mean some re-writing if you have the whole thing done already than you may need to do more work to fix that overall. But really, one should go with what feels best for them, I suppose - I've seen both ways work well, and work not-so-well. *shrugs*

Also here be Neiko Star's idea from...back in September:
Quote:

I'm a big fan of fantasy and magic, but I can't write them to save my life. >.< The major problem is that it's hard for me to plot my stories out. I have a couple of ideas, but I really don't know what to do with them. I hardly have enough to write a story, but it seems like I'm just too lazy to take the time to plot the whole thing out. I mean, most of my 'idea's are actually just concepts, and I actually have no idea what the main plot or characters are. I don't expect to get a substantial plot out of this, but I'd appreciate it if somebody just gave me a few pointers or recommendations.

Idea #1: The Book of Spells contains spells and incantations. There are 100 pages, and ten spells per page. The Book of Summons contains the list of supernatural creatures you have signed contracts with. You can sign up to 500 contracts. Then there's a third book, a book used to store magical items and such, though I haven't come up with a name for it yet. Each mage starting out will get one spell, one contract and one item. The first space on the first page of every Book is framed with fancy gold curves. That's where they go. The first spell is nearly always unique to the user. The first contract you sign is different than others, because it's a blood contract, so the beast is bound to you for life. Every time you master a spell, it becomes engraved in your Book of Spells. The Books are written in an ancient rune language (haven't found a name yet). Each mage has their own Frequency (not sure about this name either) of Resonance. Resonance is when you pulse your magic through something, and Frequency is like fingerprints of your magic, unique to a single person. The person's Frequency is inscribed in runes on the cover of the Books. Only the user's Frequency can unlock the Books. The Books are white and colourless when you receive them. When you unlock them for the first time, it takes a huge burst of magic. If you manage to unlock them, they'll get their own colour, depending on the branch and type of your magic. It is the goal of each mage to complete their Books. Everybody has their Books, as they are part of one's soul, but not everyone can unlock them. That means only those with a powerful and pure Resonance can become mages. That's pretty much all I have right now.

Ugh, I have to sleep now, I'll post the rest of my ideas tomorrow morning...
On first glance - what are the actual purposes of contracts - I feel that could be further established for instance, and what sort of creatures (beyond 'supernatural' as mentioned) does one make contracts with as well? Is there any reason for the 10 spells per page, 500 contracts, etc limits mentioned here as well? (For instance is thre anything stoppoing one for using a different book, or fitting more, or indeed less than 10 spells on each page? And as you said you'd be 'the rest of your ideas later, so you might as well do that too I suppose, in case some clarifies some of those questions. =p

Prometheus December 17th, 2010 11:26 AM

The book off summons seems fantastic.


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