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Kura December 2nd, 2010 8:40 AM

Sex and Religion
 
Note: This is not a thread about SEXUALITY and religion. That's a separate topic that is addressed in many other threads here.

I've decided that I wanted a younger generation's opinion on this matter;
How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?
And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
How do you feel about sex and religion?


You don't have to reply to all of these questions.. but I just wanted to hear your opinion on ones that hit home for you, and I was interested on hearing the opinions of the ones that are bolded.

Rogue planet December 2nd, 2010 9:30 AM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
I'm pretty possessive so I wouldn't really like the feeling of imagining someone I love being with anybody else, but that's just a natural feeling I get and I wouldn't hold it against my partner or think any less of them. I wouldn't let it dominate my thoughts or get in the way of our relationship, and I certainly wouldn't bring it up with my partner. I feel it's unrealistic to expect anyone to not have experiences before they met me.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?
Whether they do or not, I don't really care. I wouldn't feel awkward, and if I did it would be for an unrelated reason.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?
I had essentially boycotted the idea of marriage. Although now I may get married one day just because it seems like a nice idea, and of course there are benefits to being married to someone. But I feel marriage is unnecessary when it comes to defining love. You can love someone just the same regardless of whether you're married with them or not. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me how much I love a person. It's just recognition in the eyes of the government and the church, and I don't care for either the government or religion so marriage is not that big of a deal to me. Love (and sex) is a very personal thing and I don't think it's anyone's place to try and tell people how to express their love, whether it's in the name of religion or not.

When it comes to sex, I think people can make it into whatever they want it to be. On one hand it's a totally natural occurrence and people enjoy it, so I don't see any problem with promiscuity between two consenting adults; just as long as they use adequate protection, because I think it's incredibly selfish and irresponsible to risk bringing a child into this world with someone you're not even in a close relationship with.

On the other hand, some people cherish the act and want to save themselves for their soulmate (if they believe in such a thing) or until after marriage, and that's fine too. It's something that individuals just have to decide for themselves how much meaning they place on it. There's no right or wrong way to view sex.

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery?
Absolutely ridiculous and I find it appalling that the money of tax payers is being used for such things.

In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?
I think society on average is actually becoming more promiscuous. Probably because of the media and because religion's influence is dwindling. I don't see a problem with it really, what consenting people do is not really any business of mine. It doesn't do any harm as long as there's no pregnancy.

I can understand religion's stance on sex. But to push those views on others is never a good thing to do, there should be a choice allowed. The only problem I can see with it (as you have probably guessed) is the chance of pregnancy. And I'm really divided here. On one hand I support freedom of choice and don't think it's right to tell people not to have sex, on the other hand so many people are just inconsiderate and don't bother staying safe, and as a result there's a ridiculous number of teen pregnancies.

I think there is quite a bit of a misconception surrounding sex now. As if losing your virginity is some sort of achievement or something, a certain forum I go to is full of virgins in their 20s (all male of course) and a startling number of them resort to hiring a prostitute just because they're desperate to lose their virginity. I think it's crazy how people feel under so much pressure that they'll resort to such things. Society has placed sex on a pedestal as if it's the greatest thing an individual can do in their life. I think religion might have actually contributed to this; as it was formerly forbidden, it somehow developed into a sign of rebellion, which appealed to people, and then it ended up becoming the sex-obsessed society we see today.

Rich Boy Rob December 2nd, 2010 12:41 PM

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?
There shouldn't be anything wrong with sex with multiple partners in my opinion. If someone's willing to share the love as it were, they should be allowed. Over-sexualisation? I suppose that's kind of true, but I don't think that's inherently bad. By objects do you mean like sex toys? If so, I don't think there's anything wrong with them. They have definitely become reasonably common in the last few years, at least one of the girls I've spoken to said she found her mum's in draw. There's an Ann Summers in most big shopping centres now.

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?

To be honest that wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?
Well it is generally accepted that people will have sex before marriage anyway, so no.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?
Yes.

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery?
No. Seriously, what is the point in that? Breaking your hymen doesn't even necessarily mean you've had sex anyway.

In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?
As I said, it generally expected that people will have sex before marriage now.

This is coming from an Atheist if you hadn't guessed ;)

twocows December 2nd, 2010 1:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kura (Post 6320094)
I've decided that I wanted a younger generation's opinion on this matter

Well, I can't make myself younger. :(
Quote:

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?
Well, speaking from an atheist's perspective... If people wish to restrict their own sexuality based on their beliefs, I have no problem with it. As long as it doesn't interfere with others' freedom to pursue their happiness, I really don't care.

Quote:

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?
In order: no, I don't understand the question, no, it's not a big deal to me, and yes. I'm not into casual dating or whatever, so I only get together with people I really like to begin with.

Quote:

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)
It's absurd that taxpayer dollars ANYWHERE are going toward something like this. It's cosmetic surgery, and while I have no problem with people getting that kind of surgery, it should not be paid for by the people.

Quote:

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?
It doesn't bother me at all. As long as both parties are consenting, I see no problem with it.

Quote:

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)
Neither. I don't think things are "over-sexualized" at all. The only thing I've seen is people becoming more tolerant of certain lifestyles, and I fully support that. And I think if people want to have sex for pleasure or whatever, that's their decision, and as long as they're open about it to their partners I don't care a bit.

Quote:

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
It's a carnal act to which we've assigned some meaning. That's not to say that meaning isn't important, but the way I see it, the only meaning it has is that which we've given it. As for limits, I do not condone non-consensual sex nor do I condone a person having sex without being forthcoming about his or her prior sexual experiences and/or his or her diseases.

Quote:

How do you feel about sex and religion?
As long as they don't try and force others to act as they desire, religious people are free to behave as they want regarding sex.

dragoniteuser December 2nd, 2010 2:04 PM

Quote:

I've decided that I wanted a younger generation's opinion on this matter;
Well I don't think I fit this description, but what the heck, I'll give it a go!

Quote:

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?
Well sex with multiple partners is OK if everyone who's engaged is OK with it. Don't really know how else to put it...
Sex before marriage is actually perfectly normal to me! IMO sex is very important aspect of any marriage, and two people should definitely see if they can live with, or be with someone before going into such an obligation.
Oversexsualisation, well don't really know what to say about that, other that it's expected from my side, but I'm pretty indifferent to the subject.

Quote:

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?
As I've said before, I don't see nothing wrong with that! And I don't see why anyone's virginity has anything to do with their relationships. IMO relationships are emotional, and not strictly sexual arrangements (if they can be called as such...) and i don't see why anyone's virginity would make any difference in a relationship.

Quote:

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)
Yet another completely unnecessary surgery. If I understood this UK health system correctly, it's there for those women who lost their virginity by rape, but if that is the case, what they need is counseling, and not plastic surgery! Their hymen is the last of their problems!

Quote:

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?
Wait i think I've answered this one already...

Quote:

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)
IMO religion is way to conservative for 21st century, one of the reasons I'm atheist by choice, and they see a lot of life aspects as over sexualized.

Quote:

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
I think they're both! In a way, it's definitely a carnal act that rarely has emotions in it. Basically it's two (or more, depends on what you're into ;)) people enjoying themselves. On the other hand, I know from personal experience that sex can be very spiritual (I assume you meant emotional) act, and can amplify someone's feelings greatly! Not to mention that sex with passion and love is the best king of sex! :D

Quote:

How do you feel about sex and religion?
No connected in any way, IMO!

kidpunk December 2nd, 2010 2:25 PM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?

I really wouldn't. If this is a sexual relationship, as long as the person wasn't a dirty bird or had an STDs, then I wouldn't have a problem with it. I wouldn't feel awkward at all if they were expecting to have sex before marriage, as long as we both knew each other well enough and trusted each other. To me, most things between two or more people are about trust. Sex before marriage is not a big deal. People over exaggerate with it because as you say in the title, these are either the people with high moral values are religious. Like I said before, I would go along with it.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?

Yes. There is nothing wrong with it as long as there is enough trust in the relationship, it is healthly, and both people are ready.

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)

Times will always change. People 20 years ago probably thought that things were being over-sexualized in their generation, and people today would probably thing that it isn't risque enough. Due to this, I think that we are right on track, and things, at least in countries where sexual health and culture is acknowledge, are not over-sexualized. Sex and religion never have and never will mix, in my opinion. They are two different things, and religion should never be a factor to someone that will be having sexual relations. If religion is such a big thing to you along with sex, than good luck to you.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?

I believe that sex is neither of the two. Unless you're a sex addict, it shouldn't be limited in any way, shape, or form. Sex is part of the culture of the 21st century. Either you're on the boat, or you aren't. I really do not want to get into this subject here much, but if I had to choose between the two, it would be more of a spiritual act.

How do you feel about sex and religion?

As I said before, Sex is like Oil and Water. You don't mix the two.

Kura December 2nd, 2010 2:55 PM

I really like the point you guys are bringing up! :3 I enjoy reading all these opinions. I read something recently:

Are people who marry their first sexual partners more likely to cheat?
According to Edward O. Laumann, author of The Sexual Organization of the City, as time goes by, "the more likely you're not going to have people who did not have multiple sexual experiences before they finally married." Laumann guesses that more sex partners before marriage is related to more and better cheating later on, and that those, how do you say, fidel couples, "tend to be married, somewhat more religious, and... have somewhat less likelihood of infidelity because of the normative beliefs that they have."


I know I definitely agree with this on some level.. but also that don't think being necessarily religious or getting married really merits if someone cheats or not. I think it's all about how highly you view that as a moral, I think.


I was wondering on how many of you guys agree with this (OR disagree with this..)

Sydian December 2nd, 2010 3:16 PM

Cool a sex topic!

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
I would feel weird about it, to be honest. It seems increasingly harder to find people that are like me and would like to wait til marriage.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage?
It depends on their attitude towards it. There are some people that have sex before marriage and they know that they made a mistake and don't want to do that again, and then there are some that just wanna make sure they have sex with everyone they date. I think I'm smart enough to figure out who is who when it comes to that.

Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?
I don't think that's enough to leave them, no. But I view it as a big deal; it's a big step in any relationship.

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)
They do that? Well, it doesn't change anything...if you had sex, you had sex. That's not your original hymen, and you know you had sex. But if you're talking about cases where the girl was raped, then I reckon that's better suited...but...they still know it happened. It's not too much of a fresh slate the way I look at it.


Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc)?
I do not. It bothers me, personally. So I'm not in some rush to go have sex before I'm married. Other people, I don't care as long as they're not getting STDs by having sex with a ton of people. But I will be honest and say that if the situation ever arose with someone I was truly in love with and without a doubt thought I was going to marry, I would gladly submit. I have a lot of self control, so even the chance of that happening is very low. But back to the question, I believe it's just more special to save yourself for your husband/wife. That way you and your spouse don't know what sex is like, so they can't compare you with previous partners. It would be the only sex life you know, and you'd enjoy it much more. I feel like there's not enough emphasis on waiting.

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way?
There were subliminal sex messages in songs back in the day. They're just more up front about it now because no one cares too much anymore.


Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)
Wait, my religion is preventing me from seeing someone naked? Or are you telling me I can't fap? Hmm. I don't get this question.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
Both. I mean...okay, nevermind. I can't explain it, but you know, there's gotta be some physical things going on. But having sex does affect your mind, I think. If that's the context we're using "spiritual" in. Using big words is bad. And wait, limit sex? Well hey, if you're not breaking your penis or wearing out your vagina, then go all you want. No skin off my nose.

How do you feel about sex and religion?
They're just...there. I don't have to have a religion to have sex, and I don't have to have sex to have a religion. Unless you mean the two together. I think...I don't know.

Zet December 2nd, 2010 3:25 PM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
I would be completely fine with it.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?
I'm a pretty open minded person, so I don't go rage on people who have sex before marriage. But I myself would have sex after I get married.

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized?
I kinda do feel like things have been over-sexualized these days instead of the 90's when anything sexual in a cartoon was edited. But one of the main thing these days is the creepy clothing line for kids, and miley cyrus's 9 year old sister isn't helping out with her lingerie line for kids.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act?
From a religious standpoint I could see it being called a spiritual act of two souls becoming one.

Yuoaman December 2nd, 2010 3:41 PM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?

Not at all. I can't really say much on the matter, for me it's a non-issue.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage?

If I had feelings for them I don't feel as if this would be an issue.

Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?

Nope.

Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?


Not a big deal - yep.


And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)

It's ridiculous. The surgery is frivolous and should be paid for by the recipient, not by the taxpayers.

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way?


It's always been there, it has just always been repressed by religion and the like.

Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)

I see nothing wrong with finding pleasure in the female form, it's perfectly natural. :\

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?

It's carnal. Everything has sex, whether they can be spiritual or not. It's only humans who have applied this spirituality to the act.

How do you feel about sex and religion?

Maybe religion should back off a little? The fact that many religions don't condone safe sex angers me beyond all belief. It's like they want people to get STDs and die.

Perriechu December 3rd, 2010 1:07 AM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?

Not really. But I would feel weird, if that makes sense >.<

Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?

Depends on how "weird" I felt, but 95% NO.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?

Not really, religion tried to push this onto Kids/Teens, and it didn't work, just made them do it more.

How do you feel about sex and religion?.

Sex is great!. No in all seriousness, Religion shouldn't say whether teen's and other's should use protection, and I'm surprised they look down on people who do use Protection.

Timbjerr December 3rd, 2010 3:43 AM

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?

I'm not the most religious person in the world, but I do tend to look down upon all of the above simply because of my Catholic upbringing. Less so nowadays than when I was a kid. XD

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?

It would definitely be awkward mainly because I'm personally just not interested in sex...at all.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?

I'm a twenty-three year old virgin and I've never once had the urge to insert my ***** into a ******, at least past the hormonal insanity of puberty. My opinion may be skewed by my own extremely high willpower, but what's so flipping hard about abstinence?!? What's so hard about at least waiting until you're with someone you truly love and/or you're financially prepared for a child just in case?

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?

Most likely a little of both, but it can altered by the participants' perception. If it's a one-night-stand between two strangers, of course there's nothing spiritual about it. If it's between two people that love eachother, it's a deeply spiritual experience. XD

KanadeTenshi December 3rd, 2010 3:57 AM

I think:
Just another fun thing religion wants to make less fun.

I'll answer anyway:
How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?
Stupid, stupid, stupid.


Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?

Guys/girls (I'm bi) with experience are better. I don't wanna do all the work.
Do you agree with sex before marriage?

Yeah why not?


Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?

Don't give me this spiritual act crap. It might be more fun when it's someone you know for some time rather than a few hours.. but I dunno about that.
Limiting it is just another stupid thing religion does.

Stellar December 3rd, 2010 5:59 AM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
At first I might, but I would never make that the sole reason for a break-up. You wouldn't judge a book by its cover, so why would you judge a person by that one aspect of their life?

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage?

They might, they might not. If they do, then they're only hurting their chances of ever being with me. If not, I give them major props for showing that kind of maturity.

Do you agree with sex before marriage?
Yes. I strongly believe that sex between two mature people (who are in love) is a beautiful thing with or without commitment. Sexuality is something that should be embraced, not suppressed, and respected, but never abused.

Though I do understand completely why others would wait. It's not something to be taken lightly, and placing marriage as a stepping stone towards that union is a very intelligent choice.

Do you feel that, in today's society, things have become over-sexualized?
Yes. Human beings are, by nature, highly sexual creatures. To suppress such an urge is like being deprived of something to the point where it dominates your mind and your actions. If sexuality was regarded more as a natural aspect of our lives, society as a whole might stop making such a big deal out of it.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
It can be either, but at best it's both. And because I believe sex is the ultimate expression of love, yes, I think it should be limited only to those you feel very strongly for, assuming both parties are mature enough to handle it.

Rogue planet December 3rd, 2010 6:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kura (Post 6320628)
I really like the point you guys are bringing up! :3 I enjoy reading all these opinions. I read something recently:

Are people who marry their first sexual partners more likely to cheat?
According to Edward O. Laumann, author of The Sexual Organization of the City, as time goes by, "the more likely you're not going to have people who did not have multiple sexual experiences before they finally married." Laumann guesses that more sex partners before marriage is related to more and better cheating later on, and that those, how do you say, fidel couples, "tend to be married, somewhat more religious, and... have somewhat less likelihood of infidelity because of the normative beliefs that they have."


I know I definitely agree with this on some level.. but also that don't think being necessarily religious or getting married really merits if someone cheats or not. I think it's all about how highly you view that as a moral, I think.


I was wondering on how many of you guys agree with this (OR disagree with this..)

I can agree with this somewhat, but I don't think promiscuity and loyalty are connected. Someone can be promiscuous but still have a high sense of loyalty, and vice versa. It just so happens that promiscuity can often accompany a low sense of devotion, seeing as they're clearly not keen to tie themselves down to just one person.

Having a partner and having a one night stand are two totally different things, someone might be willing to throw themselves around into a lot of one night stands, but if they do get a partner it's likely they'll value them more than just somebody they happened to have sex with a few times, so they could have a higher sense of devotion to a partner.

Also, someone who's not promiscuous at all might be willing to cheat just because they develop strong feelings for someone other than their partner, if they devote themselves to people they care for, then that mindset might push them to please other people, other than their partner. Or they might not have a high sense of devotion/loyalty at all. Although just because they're not promiscuous doesn't mean it's because they think it's wrong; it might simply because they are too beta don't know how to be, but would still like to be seen as someone who's able to get multiple partners, so take any chance they can get.

There can be so many reasons as to why someone would cheat, whether a person is promiscuous before being with their partner or not.

It all depends on their personality I think, it just so happens certain traits can often accompany people that are promiscuous and other traits accompany people that are not. But such judgements can't be passed on everyone, everyone is unique after all.

And when it comes to life choices such as this, most people just use religion as a guiding tool. There are plenty of people that are very religious, but still very promiscuous, as well as there being people who aren't religious at all, but still have a very high sense of devotion. When it comes to personal life choices, religion rarely defines someone's actions.
I know you are religious Kura, but your sense of devotion would likely still be there even if you weren't religious, because it seems like it's just part of your character.

Kites December 3rd, 2010 11:14 AM

Hm. You wanted the younger generation's opinion... am I too old to be answering this? XD Oh well, I will anyway.

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?

To each his own, I guess. I'm not religious but it doesn't bother me that others have different beliefs than me. Multiple partners is not something I would personally go for, sex before marriage is fine with me... but those are just my opinion. I don't really care what others do.

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
I think I might feel more awkward going into a relationship with someone who was. ^^; (Even if I was too.) I would worry that he would wonder what it's like to be with other women and that the relationship wouldn't last. The only bad thing is, it can be hard thinking about the person I'm with being with someone else before me. But I just have to remind myself that it's in the past, and they broke up for a reason.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?
No not really. I would only be uncomfortable if they tried to force sex upon me before I was ready. (I don't care about being married, but it is important to me to at least be very close/in love with the person first.)

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery?

I find it weird. I don't see the hymen as that important anyway. Just because it's back, doesn't mean you're magically a virgin again. Likewise, it's possible to not have one and still be a virgin.

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?
I'm fine with it. It seems where I'm from, most people aren't waiting these days. Even many of the religious people I know end up having sex before marriage.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act?
I think it's a great way to connect with someone you love deeply. Personally don't find it spiritual. But I understand it can be for some. I also understand that for some, it can just be a fun act to do with anybody, with no commitment. That's fine too, just not for me.

Kura December 3rd, 2010 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vendak (Post 6321693)
I know you are religious Kura, but your sense of devotion would likely still be there even if you weren't religious, because it seems like it's just part of your character.

I think it's funny that you consider me religious.. because I'm not religious in the least bit. Haha but I see what you're saying. I guess I just value different things than the regular agnostic or atheist person (I haven't really defined myself as either.. but I feel like I'm a spiritual person that does like to take teachings from a multitude of different religions and apply them to my daily life- but I am not necessarily actually religious.)

I kinda see waiting as a beautiful thing. Especially when you're just getting to know the other person and you see them as a potential partner for the future to spend the rest of your life with. I feel like there are so many other aspects of them that you can explore without having to resort to sex or over-sexualizing them.
I feel like nowadays.. people view waiting like "what for?" and I think waiting can be really valuable in some relationships.. since many can go awry once sex is brought into it. And if people worry about "testing" their partner to see if they're good in bed.. well.. why should that matter if both people are giving and want each other to feel good? You have years and years to practice getting better.
That being said.. sex should DEFINITELY still be talked about. Talk about it until your face goes blue. Seriously. It's very important to talk about expectations and sex in relationships.

I necessarily don't agree with waiting for -after marriage- but I see it as waiting until a certain point in your life that you are both committed to each other and want to know each other on the deepest level.
I see sex as the most intimate of someone's whole being.. kinda like the deepest "secret" of someone. I believe that when you have sex you're in your raw-est sense of self, and I believe that it should be saved for someone who can appreciate it to it's fullest.
I feel like I wouldn't appreciate the act of sex on a superficial level- I understand that sex is a basic human need, but to me, the beauty of sex isn't the actual act but the mutual connection and understanding and wanting to give the pleasure to your loved one.

That being said, I don't necessarily frown upon people who have sex before marriage or with multiple partners or all the like (if it is consensual) but I do feel that I have an appreciation for those who want to wait because waiting seems to have been thrown out the window nowadays. I feel like people don't really see a need to wait anymore, and for that reason, act out sexually before they've even completely matured (in the head) yet. It may also have to do with religion declining.. but I think it's mostly to do with the "free love" movement in the 70s and the fact that having sex "just to have fun" is deemed normal in today's society.

It may also have to do with more people coming out of the closet lately.. and the fact that there is hardly any consequences for same-sex partners or even man/woman partners (because of contraceptives.)
I feel that nowadays, women are becoming more promiscuous than the men. Women have been sexually repressed for many years (even in the Victorian era) and I see more and more women having an open view of sex because of the introduction of the pill and contraceptives. I don't know yet if I agree entirely on this, though.. I have opposing viewpoints.

As long as no one is hurting another person, then I really don't care what they want to do with their bodies. I am repulsed, though, by the people who center their lives around sex and no other aspect of living.. because appreciation for everything else is thrown out the window.

But to summarize, even though I'm not religious, I value waiting. I think religion gives a good basis on to how to approach sex, but it shouldn't be taken too literally. I also believe that not enough people put an emphasis on waiting out there.. but should definitely consider it more especially for their personal health.

Rich Boy Rob December 4th, 2010 3:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kites (Post 6321969)
Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?
I think I might feel more awkward going into a relationship with someone who was. ^^; (Even if I was too.) I would worry that he would wonder what it's like to be with other women and that the relationship wouldn't last. The only bad thing is, it can be hard thinking about the person I'm with being with someone else before me. But I just have to remind myself that it's in the past, and they broke up for a reason.

I think I have to agree with you there. I'm not really sure why, but being someone's first would be a little bit awkward I think, especially as it won't necessarily feel very good for her the first time, what with the bleeding and stuff.

Cirrus December 4th, 2010 8:35 AM

Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin?

Depending on their previous circumstances... but definitely at least a little.

Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage?
Would you feel awkward or even break up with them?
If the expectation was so heavy that they'd actually exert pressure (or break up... whatever), then I wouldn't actually go into a relationship with said person in the first place.

Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?


It's not a big deal... if you know that you're going to be spending your life with that person. Otherwise, yes, it's a huge deal, and no, I wouldn't if I didn't know that.

Fidelity issues.

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?

I... don't necessarily agree, because so many people are just doing it randomly and not having much of an idea of whether or not they will stay with their partner. I especially frown on the fact that apparently some men think sleeping with multiple partners in a short period of time is an accomplishment. That idea is hugely preposterous.

But as stated before, if you truly know that yes, this is the person you are going to be spending your life with (you've known each other for a long time, and finally you're engaged and everything!) then I... don't disagree with that.

In fact I greatly agree with Kura.

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion?

Yes, things have definitely become over-sexualized. A couple decades ago it was considered extremely rude to even mention such things (or swear?) in public; now, it's a common occurrence. What has the world come to...

As for the last question... it's not very specific. Therefore I can't answer. Honestly, if it's an expression of actual love (and conforms to the standards I set previously, i.e. near/after marriage), go for it, I guess. Except for the "multiple partner sex" thing; that just seems stupid and crazy.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?

Sex? As in normal sex? Mostly carnal, and completely so if you don't know the person that well or if you don't actually know if you want to spend your life with them. However, if the latter IS true and the answer is yes, then I would say that the act is spiritual to a certain degree as well, because it's an act of sharing their innermost selves for the two participants.

How do you feel about sex and religion?

They're not even related.

Jokes aside... I can't speak for other religions, but I feel that Christianity's restrictions are fairly reasonable and are likely what I would've done anyway.

As an aside, I've always been educated that sex is a really important experience that you should only share with the person you are going to marry, even before I converted to Christianity, so... my views might be slanted that way, Idunno.

Corvus of the Black Night December 4th, 2010 3:41 PM

Oh yay, more questions! I like questions :3

How do you feel about sex and religion in terms of many things- multiple partners, sex before marriage, and over-sexualization of people or objects?
I usually don't equate religion with sexual activities. We are human and that is the reason why we have sex.

Multiple Partners - I can't say I agree with it just because usually an intimate relationship is just that - intimate. It's intended to be about the person you love for the rest of your life. It's like splitting someone's dinner with two or three people - its undernourishing in a mutual love-based way. Of course, if that's what you want to do, not stopping you lol

Sex before Marriage - Don't disagree with it as much as multiple partners (because one hadn't developed a partner yet), but its not exactly intimate. I've always viewed that if you were willing to put someone else's body within your own that the relationship should be close between the two... but again, not saying it's wrong. However, I would preach against it just because it's also dangerous.

Sex preformed before in another marriage is not bad at all. It's before you realize that the person you're with isn't really the one...

Oversexualization - Don't care lol. Heck, I make penis/boobs jokes all the time. lmfao
Would you feel awkward going into a relationship with someone knowing that they're not a virgin? Do you feel that they might place an expectation on you to want to have sex with them before marriage? Would you feel awkward or even break up with them? Or do you feel like sex before marriage is not a big deal? Would you go along with it?
I would only feel awkward in that situation if that person was ridden with some sort of STD. My father did it with 2 other women before my mom, but I don't think it's really weird at all, especially considering they were both clean.

Regardless of whether or not someone was married or not and had already had sex... they're going through a test before they do it with me. If they're clean, I really don't care after that (if I really love them all that much)

And what is your opinion on hymen reconstructive surgery- a surgery that IS part of the health system in the UK for women who have had distressed sexual experiences (although it is recently found by statistics that it is being taken advantage of and exploited by Muslims because virginity and religion is a big deal in their culture.)
Let them. It's not my body.

Do you agree with sex before marriage? What are your thoughts on sex before marriage? In your opinion, is it dwindling- or do you believe that much more emphasis is actually being put on waiting because of society's conflicts today (less jobs, etc) ?

As I said... I don't think it's a good idea, and going around screwing everyone in the neighbourhood is a dumb idea and proves that you really don't love the people you're doing. Don't call that kind of behaviour intimate in any way because it's NOT.

Otherwise, let them do what they want. Not my body.'

Do you feel that, in today's society, have things become over-sexualized? Or have they always really been this way? Do you disagree with sex having to be "one way" described by religion? (The difference between pornography and voyeurism (taking sexual pleasure in seeing the naked body) for instance.)
I don't care that much.

I take pleasure in seeing a naked body, but not in a sexual way - I am an artist after all and I find the nude a beautiful piece of evolutionary work.

Do you believe sex is a carnal act or a spiritual act? And should it be limited?
Sex is a reproductive act, but evolution favoured the creatures that liked to do it (obviously, or else we'd all be dead!). Basically, sexual intercourse is a natural part of human existence. Restricting that is like restricting running around and having fun - it's certainly not necessarily a part of life we need, but it certainly enhances the experience (although sexual intercourse is necessary to continue the human race). Having as much sex as you want (as long as it's healthy and not detracting from other parts of life such as work) is fine. Heck, do it with other partners... although I wouldn't call any of those relationships "intimate" anymore.

An intimate relationship however I would define is a very emotional relationship with your partner... and it cannot involve more than one partner because it's emotional prowess to the maximum level.

How do you feel about sex and religion?
Sex and religion are not related in my opinion...

OmegaRuby and AlphaSapphire December 4th, 2010 3:45 PM

Do you agree with sex before marriage? I don't agree with this and it's kind of sad that marriage rates have dropped drastically here in the United states...


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