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The Gym
THE FINAL EPISODE IS NOW POSTED!!! So here's a little fan fiction I conjured up in order to practice writing screenplays. Oh no, it's a script! (Oooooh, it's so unorthodox and spooky!) I used a wonderful program named Celtx that does all the proper formatting for me, but since I can't copy and paste the formatting, it won't look as professional here as it does on the PDF. Anyway, just a few things to note, this is basically written as The Office or the superior Parks and Recreation, except instead of an office it takes place at Brock's gym. Also, when you see (Talking Head) or (T.H.) in the script, it means the character is doing one of those interviews to the camera you see so much in reality shows. Anyway, here we go!
THE GYM Episode 01: The Reporter Episode 02: Exercise Tapes Episode 03: Spelunking Episode 04: The Challenger Episode 05: Ribbon Cutting Episode 06: The Convention Episode 07: The Fangirl Episode 08: Sweepstakes Mania Episode 09: Kanto Gym Leader Council Episode 10: The Trial Episode 11: The Inspection Episode 12: Brown Nosing Episode 13: Sycophant Search Episode 1: The Reporter INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK is pacing around the gym, giving directions to LIAM. The gym itself is just a large, drab, brown room, littered with rocks around. BROCK So I'm going to need you to polish up all the rocks so they look nice and rocky. And can you mop the floors too? They haven't been mopped since my parents visited... two years ago. LIAM Yes sir! I'll be done with that in hardly any light years! Brock How many times do I have to tell you, Liam? Light years measure distance, not time! Brock (Talking head) I'm Brock, and I'm the gym leader of the Pewter City Gym. I've been leading the gym for a while now, and it's basically become my home. Actually, it is my home. I stopped paying the rent on my apartment. Anyway, it's great that you're filming this documentary, as I believe there's a lot of effort that goes into being a gym leader beyond battling that the public should be aware of. Like... um... well, personally, for me, I sink a ton of time into coming up with rock puns. Yeah, so there's that and the battling too. Some days I just get exhausted from all the work. LIAM begins polishing all the rocks around the gym as BROCK watches him with his arms crossed. LIAM starts complaining as he wipes his brow. LIAM What's the cause for all this cleaning anyway? BROCK That really isn't any of your business. BROCK (T.H.) Liam is under my employ here at the gym. He's my assistant, so that means he basically does all the stuff I don't feel like doing. He's great having around when I have to get a colonoscopy! But anyway, why do I have him cleaning up the place? There's a girl coming over! I met her at this bar last night. I walked up to her said, "Hey, I'm a gym leader," and she said, "Wow, that's cool, can I come over the gym tomorrow?" I said, "Sure, and I'll be sure to rock your world," and she giggled a bit, and then I said, "Get it, because I train rock types?" and she said, "I got it." Hands down it's the most successful social interaction with a girl I've ever had. LIAM (T.H.) Hi, I'm Liam! I work here as Brock's assistant. Apparently I got the job because no one else applied, which I just don't understand! Who wouldn't want to be Brock's assistant? What's wrong with him? It's great training. I totally want to be a gym leader when I grow up. I heard that this girl Maylene became a gym leader in Sinnoh and she's only a year older than me, so I have high hopes! Sometimes the job can be really taxing though. I don't think I can go through another colonoscopy. As LIAM continues to clean, a knocking noise comes in from the outside. BROCK Ah ****, she's here already! Liam, hide the cleaning supplies in my office! I don't want her thinking I cleaned especially for her! LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM runs off carrying polish and a mop to the office as BROCK goes over to the gym's entrance and opens the door. A girl, GLADYS, walks into the gym. GLADYS Hi Brock, how's it going? GLADYS looks around and stares at the camera for a bit. GLADYS What's with the camera? BROCK Wait, how did you know my name?! GLADYS I live in Pewter City. Everyone knows who the gym leader is. BROCK Oh, that makes more sense than what I was thinking. I thought you were a stalker. Now, I wouldn't be completely put off by that idea. Actually, it's kind of hot thinking that someone would stalk me. GLADYS Okay... BROCK So what's your name, anyway? GLADYS I'm Gladys, I'm a reporter with the Pewter City Gazette. GLADYS (T.H.) Being a member of the press isn't exactly as glamorous as it's made out to be. When you work in local news, like myself, you do get to meet your fair share of celebrities, but I wouldn't even consider them D-list. Probably Z-list. You know, like some guy that saved a girl being attacked by a Fearow, or Brock. But really, why is this being filmed? How do I look on camera? BROCK (T.H.) Damn, I bagged a reporter! Maybe she can arrange a meeting between me and that guy who saved a girl from that Fearow! BROCK So what do you think of the place? This is the Pewter City Gym, my pride and joy! GLADYS It's kind of messy. I mean, there are all these rocks, just sitting around. Do you have an office we can use? BROCK Oh, of course! I'd never do it out here anyway! GLADYS It's good to see we're on the same page. BROCK (T.H.) Good old Brock is getting laid today! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM is scurrying to find a place to put the cleaning supplies as BROCK and GLADYS enter. GLADYS Oh dear, look at all those cleaning products? You didn't clean the place up for me, did you? BROCK ****. GLADYS What was that? BROCK Nothing. BROCK (T.H.) I didn't want her thinking I cleaned up the place special for her. The last thing a girl wants to think is that you'd go out of your way for them. GLADYS So who's this young man anyway? LIAM I'm Liam. I'm the gym assistant. BROCK Well Liam, thanks for helping out, but I think you should head back out and find some work to do in the arena. Gladys and I are going to be busy in here. GLADYS I don't have any problem if he wants to stay for the interview. BROCK Interview? GLADYS Of course. I'm here to interview the Pewter City Gym Leader. Why else would I come all the way here? BROCK (T.H.) I guess Gladys and I had a failure to communicate. I thought she was talking about sex, and she thought I was talking about an interview. Frankly, I think all the blame falls on her. Why the hell would I want an interview? LIAM I want to stay for this. It could be fun! GLADYS The boy wants to stay, Brock. BROCK Fine, he can stay! GLADYS rummages through her purse until she takes out a tape recorder. GLADYS I'm just going to record the conversation. It's easier than writing everything down. BROCK That's not a problem. GLADYS turns the recorder on. GLADYS So, do you get a lot of challengers at the gym? BROCK Do I get a lot of potential challengers? Yes. Do I actually battle them? Hell no! I always turn all the lights off and lock the door to make it seem as if the gym is closed. GLADYS So you don't actually battle anyone? BROCK Well, sometimes I'll be in the middle of coming up with a great string of rock puns. I can't be bothered to interrupt that with a battle. GLADYS But isn't that your job? To battle? BROCK I'm a gym leader. I have many jobs. The first one is to best exemplify the Rock type. How do I do that? Rock puns. GLADYS What are these other jobs? BROCK Well, I also consider myself a mentor to the Pewter City youth. I go spelunking a lot at Mt. Moon. Sometimes I go speak at Rock type conventions. And then I'd say, all the way at the bottom, would be "Pokémon Battler". GLADYS If that's what you say. BROCK I did say. GLADYS Okay... so... next question... what is it about the Rock type that drew you to it? BROCK Well, Rock types are strong, just like me! And you know, I've always liked Onix, because it's long and hard and reminds me of something else I have. Want to see? GLADYS The Onix or your penis? BROCK Penis? Who said that? GLADYS Maybe you were right in wanting Liam to leave. LIAM Oh no, this is great! I've never seen an interview before! BROCK (T.H.) This interview is going great! I even got her to bring up my penis! NOW I know I'm getting laid today! EXT. OUTSIDE PEWTER CITY GYM With the interview complete, both BROCK and LIAM go outside to wish GLADYS goodbye. GLADYS Well, that was quite an unusual interview. The readers of the Pewter City Gazette are going to eat this up? BROCK Speaking of eating, how about we get dinner tonight? GLADYS Oh... um... I have work to do. And also, I'm just not interested in you. At all. BROCK is visibly hurt. BROCK Oh, okay. BROCK (T.H.) I guess I'm not getting laid. And I thought I was really good at interpreting signals! GLADYS I'm out of here. I'm sure the Gazette will send you the article once it's published. GLADYS walks away from the gym. BROCK and LIAM watch her leave. LIAM She wasn't interested in you, but at least the interview went great, right? BROCK Oh yeah! She might not want me, but as soon as some babes read that interview, they'll be hunting me down! You know what, we should go out and celebrate! I'm taking you to the bar! LIAM I'm underage... BROCK Eh, it doesn't matter. I'll get you a fake I.D. INT. PEWTER BAR BROCK (T.H.) This is the Pewter Bar, and this is actually where I met Gladys. Hopefully tonight I'll meet someone without ulterior motives... and hopefully with a lot of money! BROCK and LIAM are sitting at the bar. The BARTENDER walks up to them. BARTENDER What can I get you two? BROCK I'll just have a white wine spritzer. LIAM Shirley Temple. BARTENDER Er... okay, if that's what you want. BROCK So Liam, do you see any hot girls? LIAM Eh, I'm looking. LIAM (T.H.) I'm like 7 years younger than him! We aren't going to have the same taste in women! What is he expecting from me? BROCK What about that girl over there? BROCK points to a blond girl, JOYCE, sitting at a table by herself. LIAM I guess she's alright. BROCK She's definitely a solid eight out of ten. BROCK (T.H.) I have a Brock Scale of Hotness that I use to rate the attractiveness of every girl I meet. That reporter? Eight out of ten. Erika? Nine out of ten. Misty? Three out of ten. The scale doesn't take kindly to tomboys. BARTENDER Here are your drinks. The BARTENDER passes the drinks to BROCK and LIAM. BROCK This is exactly the liquid courage I need to go talk to that girl! BROCK chugs down the white whine spritzer in one gulp as LIAM watches, horrified. BROCK (T.H.) When you're training your Pokémon, you want to make sure they only consume the best products. Hyper potions, antidotes, revives, calciums, HP Ups. You put that stuff in your Pokemon, and you know it'll be the best it can be. I'm the same way with alcohol. BROCK Wish me luck. LIAM Good luck, sir! BROCK swaggers over to JOYCE as LIAM watches, cringing. LIAM (T.H.) I'm supportive of every decision Brock makes... except when it comes to women. BROCK Hey there, babe. What's your name? JOYCE Oh dear, you're Brock, aren't you? My name is Joyce. BROCK So you've heard of me? You know I train Rock types? Want to see my Onix? Ah ****, I messed that line up. JOYCE Oh my Arceus, that's almost exactly the same line you used on Gladys! JOYCE breaks out into a fit of giggles as BROCK stands, dumbfounded. BROCK Gladys? Gladys told you about me? Ah, so you must know about my interview! Don't you think I'm super cool? JOYCE Super cool?! JOYCE breaks out into even more giggling. JOYCE You're anything BUT super cool! Joyce let me listen to the entire interview! She said she couldn't wait to write her article and expose you for the incompetent and perverted gym leader that you are! BROCK Incompetent? Perverted? Gym Leader? Only one of those things describe me! And it's... um... the Gym Leader one! I thought that interview went great! JOYCE Really?! Did you have any idea what you were saying?! BROCK Yup. I was saying how cool I was. JOYCE No! You made a total *** out of yourself! I mean, you told her you bowled a 300 the first time you went bowling?! BROCK That's partially true. Some guy two lanes next to me did. JOYCE You also told her you were voted Kanto's Sexiest Man Alive?! BROCK That's also partially true! Some other guy was! JOYCE See what she meant? You're just making a fool of yourself! BROCK That's... that's not possible! BROCK (T.H.) I thought the interview went really well, I thought the reporter was into me, I thought the fruit in the bowl on the table wasn't wooden and okay to eat... why is everything I think wrong? BROCK returns to the bar table, his spirits diminished, as LIAM sips on his Shirley Temple. BROCK Liam, did you really think the interview went well? LIAM Of course it did! That reporter asked a lot of questions, and you answered all of them! BROCK That's not what I meant. The answers I gave: where they flattering or unflattering? LIAM I thought they were very flattering, sir! BROCK (T.H.) The problem with my only employee being a sycophant is that there's no one around to keep me in check... hm... but I guess on the flip side that can also be a good thing! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The next day, BROCK is pacing around the gym in a panic, as LIAM agrees with his every word. BROCK If this interview gets out, it's going to be bad news for the Pewter City Gym! LIAM That's right! BROCK We could get shut down by the Pokémon League! LIAM I know! BROCK I'd have to find another job! LIAM Me too! BROCK Liam, for once in your life, can you think of an original thought? Can't you see I'm panicking here?! LIAM Yes, I can see, sir! A knocking is heard from outside. BROCK ****, is that a gym challenger? I don't have time for battles right now! BROCK heads over to the door and opens it to find a TRAINER waiting. TRAINER Hey, you're Brock, right? I'm here for a gym battle. BROCK I am no speaking the English. Building here under new management. In week, it be Denny's. Please come again! With that, BROCK slams the door. BROCK I think I handled that quite well. LIAM (T.H.) Brock is AMAZING at impressions. I mean, you've already seen his foreigner impression, but he also does a pretty mean Lt. Surge impression too. "Blah blah blah electric Pokémon saved me during the war blah blah!" I do it pretty badly, but if you heard Brock's, it'd be great! BROCK (T.H.) Yeah, I do a great Lt. Surge impression. What of it? BROCK Anyway, what do we do about this whole reporter situation? LIAM Well, she recorded the interview, right? BROCK Yup. LIAM Well we can record our own fake interview, and then switch the tapes! BROCK And how exactly could we do that? Who'd play the reporter's part? LIAM (T.H.) Unfortunately, Brock isn't very good at female impressions. Though he's very good at leaving first impressions on females! BROCK That gives me another idea though. What if we switched the tape with a blank tape? That way she'd think that she just forgot to turn the recorder on! LIAM That's a much better idea! I guess that's why you're the boss! LIAM (T.H.) Brock always comes up with better ideas than me! One time, I wanted to just have macoroni for lunch, and he suggested I add cheese to the equation! The man is an innovator! INT. PEWTER CITY GAZETTE OFFICES LIAM walks into the Pewter City Gazette Offices. He's wearing an earpiece and a watch with a microphone in it that allows him to communicate with Brock. BROCK (T.H.) (VOICE ONLY) So it was my idea to use these cool walkie talkie watch things! I only use the coolest of technology! If I could only start getting it on with women, I'd practically be the same as James Bond! LIAM approaches the front desk to talk to a SECRETARY. LIAM Hi, I'm from Pewter City Middle School! I'm doing a project on the evils of the left wing media and I was wondering if I could take a look around! SECRETARY Of course! I don't see anything wrong with letting a middle school kid and a cameraman run around unaccompanied. I just need your name, kid. BROCK (V.O.) Give a fake name! SECRETARY What was that? LIAM Oh, that was my... er... stomache growling! Anyway, my name is... er... Regis! SECRETARY Okay Regis, you and your cameraman can go right ahead! LIAM Thank you! LIAM enters the office as Brock complains to him through the earpiece. BROCK (V.O.) Why the hell didn't she need the cameraman's name? LIAM walks around and finally finds a door marked "GLADYS'S OFFICE", but is dismayed to find GLADYS is in the office after taking a quick peek. He speaks into the watch. LIAM Brock, I found her office, but there's a problem. She's in it! BROCK (V.O.) I wonder why we didn't see that coming. Oh well. I guess we have to create a distraction now. And whatever you do, DON'T let Gladys see you! LIAM I won't. LIAM sneaks around the office, until he finds a door marked "EDITOR IN CHIEF". LIAM knocks on the door and the EDITOR IN CHIEF opens it. EDITOR IN CHIEF Huh? Who are you kid? What do you want? Why are you here anyway? BROCK (V.O.) Don't tell him the truth! EDITOR IN CHIEF What was that? LIAM I'm... um... listening to my dog through a radio feed. Anyway, my name is Regis, and I'm with the Kanto National News Network! I just finished up doing an undercover report on corrupt journalism, and that Gladys reporter of yours was the prime target of my study! You better have a good talking to with her about all her corruption! EDITOR IN CHIEF What? Is this true? I better talk to her right now! Kids are innocent, so they'd never lie, especially to a figure of authority like myself! BROCK (V.O.) Liam, I'm a figure of authority, so you better not be lying to me too. I hope you're really cleaning the bathrooms when I ask you too. LIAM Of course I am! As the EDITOR IN CHIEF heads to his desk to call GLADYS, LIAM sneaks around and hides around the corner of the outside of her office. He watches as GLADYS storms out of the office, fuming. GLADYS What the hell is this, "reports of corruption"? I'll get to the bottom of this ********! BROCK (V.O.) I'm not sure if I can approve of language like that in a work environment. LIAM But you use language like that at the gym all the time. BROCK (V.O.) Yeah, but the gym isn't work, it's more of a fun place. You can use whatever language you want. Enough chat, carry on. With GLADYS gone for the moment, LIAM hurries into her office. He looks around her desk, and sees on her computer she's working on an article about a robbery at the Pewter City Pokémart due that day. LIAM speaks into the watch. LIAM It looks like she hasn't started the report on you yet. BROCK (V.O.) Good! Now find that recorder! LIAM fumbles around the desk for a bit until he finally finds the tape recorder stuffed away in a drawer. LIAM Found it! BROCK (V.O.) Good! Now switch the tapes! LIAM takes a blank tape out of his pocket, removes the tape from the recorder, and puts the blank tape in, putting the tape with the interview in his pocket. Before he goes, he takes a pencil and writes "LIAM WAZ HERE" on the underside of the desk. LIAM Just something to remember me by! He runs out of the office, closes the door, and makes his exit. LIAM Thanks for everything! SECRETARY Don't mention it, Regis! With that, LIAM leaves the Pewter City Gazette Offices. LIAM (T.H.) That was absolutely thrilling! I haven't breathed so heavily since that time I crapped my pants! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM skips into the gym. LIAM I got the tape! I got the tape! BROCK Yeah, I know, I was listening to you the whole time, remember? LIAM No I don't remember because I got the tape! BROCK Also, why did you say, "Just something to remember me by"? LIAM Oh... that... I just... knocked one of her office plants down. That was all. I definitely didn't do anything that could connect me to being there. BROCK Okay, that's a relief. I was worried for a moment that you did something that would royally screw us over. Well, anyway, good job, Liam! LIAM (T.H.) Now that I've been thinking about it, maybe writing on Gladys's desk wasn't the best idea... but still, what are the chances of her actually seeing that? I'd say: bad! LIAM So what are we going to do with this tape? BROCK I have a great idea in mind! Put the tape right in the middle of the floor there! LIAM places the tape in the middle of the arena. BROCK Okay! Geodude, go! BROCK throws a Pokéball and releases GEODUDE, a floating rock with arms coming out of its sides. GEODUDE Dude dude, Geodude! BROCK Yeah, shut up wise guy! BROCK (T.H.) Sometimes I really don't like the tone of voice my Pokémon take with me! BROCK Anyway, Geodude, you see that tape over there? Let's give it a Rock Throw! GEODUDE floats over to one of the many rocks that litter the floor of the arena, picks it up, floats over to the tape, and smashes it with the rock. The tape flies all over into pieces, and BROCK and LIAM cheer. BROCK I guess that tape wasn't as solid as a rock after all! BROCK (T.H.) The work of a gym leader never ends. I didn't battle any trainers who were trying to get my badge today, but I did prevent a threatening article from being released, and I feel one of those is more important than the other. And I feel it's the preventing an article from being released one. At the end of the day, when people look back on my legacy, sure, I may not have battled that often, but as long as there isn't a published article out there telling people I didn't battle that often, I'll be fine. And no one can ever take that away from me. Unless that article is ever published. INT. PEWTER CITY GAZETTE OFFICES GLADYS returns to her office, still fuming. GLADYS I can't believe some punk *** kid named Regis has the nerve to accuse me of corrupt journalism! Just for that, I'm working extra hard today! Good thing I finished that robbery article! I'm going to work on that interview now! GLADYS sits at her desk, opens a new page on her word processor, and takes out the tape recorder. She presses play, but nothing plays back to her. GLADYS Huh? GLADYS takes more tapes out from her desk, puts them in the recorder, and plays them, but none of them are the recording she wants. GLADYS Dammit! GLADYS (T.H.) So I guess I didn't turn on the recorder when I did my interview with Brock. Ugh! It makes me feel as if I'm as big of an oaf as Brock is! It's terrible! And why am I still being taped, anyway? |
I would advise against centreing the text as can actually be hard to read it when it's formatted like so on forums (there's more on that sort of issue here). I believe it might be typical for scripts but it's not as easy to read, and sometimes it looks weird when the stage directions are set to the side as well - kinda conflicting.
I am not familiar with the term 'talking head's - maybe 'to screen' fits better but TH also works and if it's an official term used then kindly ignore this sentence. ;p Overall I was rather amused by this - there were some particularly good jokes here, and they were well carried too. Brock did come off a bit too dumb for my liking and from what I know of him to make me feel convinced, but I suppose you went for a bit of exaggeration here with his character? However the character you did portray him as was consistent. Another complaint is that the other minor characters - such as the EDITOR IN CHIEF (caps required) appeared to be a bit too stupid in accepting a child's claim that on of his workers was corrupt just like that - it felt a somewhat weak way to write Gladys out of the room so to speak, and I feel a different 'distraction' would have worked better here - the joke had also, as a result of him just accepting his word there, came off as slightly weak. I had the same feeling with Liam writing his name on the tape - I wasn't sure why he did that nor could I come up with a realistic answer, so it seemed somewhat pointless and out of place for him to do such a thing there. Quote:
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Overall it's certainly an amusing idea here and a decently made screenplay - as said just consider de-centreing it and adjust the minor errors as well, as thinking out some scenarios so they don't come off as a touch too unconvincing - namely the 'distract her somehow' scene. |
Hm... I really establish that most of the denizens of Pewter City are total idiots as I go on in, and if I was forced to order the characters in this by intelligence, it would go: Antagonistic Characters (such as Gladys) are smarter than Brock and Liam, and Brock and Liam are smarter than mostly everyone else. If you aren't going to find Brock outsmarting idiots with absurd schemes funny, you may not enjoy some of this (though luckily every episode doesn't revolve around Brock's schemes).
As for the hi-jinks at the Pewter City Gazette, your main issue seemed to be why everything had to happen the way it did, but don't worry about that. I planned this out for 13 episodes, and as it goes on, Brock will eventually have to face the consequences of his incompetence, of which this episode will play a big part in. Finally, on the formatting, I've already written the first 6 chapters formatted that way, and no one else has brought up an issue with it, so I'd rather not change ships midstream. To be honest, I think it looks more professional anyway, as opposed to "Character Name: Dialogue". |
Episode 2: Exercise Tapes INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK (TALKING HEAD) Every now and then, I have to let my Pokémon out and train them for a bit, you know, Arceus forbid I ever have to actually get into a gym battle. BROCK is standing in the gym, watching his ONIX and GEODUDE. LIAM watches, sitting on a rock. BROCK Okay Onix, how about you go do some laps around the gym? ONIX On, Onix! ONIX tries to race around the gym, but instead only manages to move about a few feet, causing an earthquake, shaking Brock around, and throwing LIAM off the rock he was sitting on. LIAM Aaack! LIAM falls onto the floor. LIAM Ow! BROCK This is bad. LIAM I know; I think I hurt my head! BROCK No! I'm not talking about you falling! I'm talking about Onix's pathetic performance right now! What the hell was that? LIAM He did move pretty slow. BROCK Tectonic plates move faster! BROCK (T.H.) As a Pokémon trainer, my Pokémon's performances are a reflection on me. So if my Pokémon can't perform, girls are going to start thinking I can't perform... in bed. BROCK Onix, try using Rock Polish. Maybe that will make you faster. ONIX becomes all bright and shiny, and then tries running again. Although Onix is able to crawl around a tiny bit faster this time, he cause even more chaos doing it, as cracks start appearing in the gym floor and LIAM is forced into rolling on the ground. LIAM Whaaah! BROCK Enough, Onix! BROCK takes out a Pokéball and returns ONIX. BROCK That was just terrible. Maybe Geodude can do better. Try some jumping jacks! GEODUDE Geodude, dude! GEODUDE tries to get up in the air, but instead crashes down into the ground, getting stuck, struggling to push itself out. GEODUDE Geo geo geo! BROCK Liam, go help him out. LIAM gets up off the ground and runs over to GEODUDE. After struggling for a bit, LIAM pulls GEODUDE out, but the force of GEODUDE flying up knocks LIAM backwards. LIAM Ooof! LIAM (T.H.) You'd think most gym assistants would be upset if their leader was only training his Pokémon once a week. Not me! BROCK Geodude, return. BROCK takes out a Pokéball and forces GEODUDE back in. BROCK Well, all my Pokémon are in worse condition than I thought. LIAM But does that really matter? When was the last time you actually fought a challenger anyway? BROCK Two months ago. But let's say, for example, this totally hot babe, a perfect ten on the Brock Hotness Scale, comes over and wants a gym battle. We battle, I totally kick her ***, and she goes, "Oh Brock, you're so strong." One thing leads to another, I end up back at her place, and then we- LIAM Okay, I get! BROCK -have sex. LIAM shakes his head as BROCK grins. LIAM Well what if we gave your Pokémon lots of vitamins? That would make them stronger, right? BROCK Oh, I'd love to! But you know that my alcohol and Pokémon budget is the same, right? And a certain someone had to order fifty Shirley Temples when we went out to the bar a couple of nights ago. LIAM looks sheepishly into the camera. LIAM (T.H.) I'm just a kid! I'm not going to be drinking any alcoholic beverages at a bar. Is it my fault Shirley Temples are the most expensive drink they make there? It doesn't even make any sense! BROCK So do you have any better ideas, Liam? LIAM Nope! That's all I got! BROCK Ugh. I don't want to actually get my Pokémon into battles to earn experience. That's too much work! Come up with something, Liam! I didn't hire you to sit around and do nothing! Brainstorm some ideas! LIAM Will do! LIAM (T.H.) So this is what I have so far... LIAM holds a list up to the camera. At the top of the list is written "Pokémon Training Ideas" underlined. The rest is blank. LIAM shakes his head. LIAM (T.H.) I really like the way I wrote that "T", though! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK sits down at his desk and starts banging his head on it. BROCK What am I going to do? What am I going to do?! BROCK picks up the remote control for the TV and turns it on. BROCK Oh well, the good old TV can heal my wounds when alcohol can't at the moment. BROCK (T.H.) I love watching TV! My favorite is pornography. Unfortunately I can't watch it here because I'm always afraid Liam will walk in. BROCK flips around channels until an infomerical catches his eye. CHUCK is on the TV. CHUCK (T.V.) Hi, I'm Chuck! I'm the gym leader of Cianwood City! BROCK Wow, it's a good thing I just happened to tune in at the very beginning of this commercial! CHUCK (T.V.) Sure, as a gym leader, I believe in Pokémon training, but personal training is important too! BROCK You know what, that's right! CHUCK (T.V.) I train under a waterfall everyday! I expect you're probably too sissy to do that, though! BROCK Damn right! CHUCK (T.V.) Luckily for you, I've created a program for those that have weaker constitutions! BROCK I have a weak constitution! BROCK (T.H.) This Chuck guy is reading my mind! He must be a Psychic type gym leader or something! CHUCK (T.V.) I've created a special video program called "Let's Chuck Tonight, Baby!" In it, I'll go over my video exclusive training exercises that'll bring you from nacho to macho! Wait a minute... "nacho to macho"? Who wrote this crap? Anyway, these tapes can be yours for only four easy payments of $19.99 plus unreasonable shipping and handling fees! To order, just visit my website: chuckvideo.biz! BROCK I need those tapes! BROCK (T.H.) My way of thinking was wrong the whole time! I thought that in order to be strong, my Pokémon had to be strong. But I figured out I can just skip the entire Pokémon part and just make myself strong! That sure saves a lot of time! BROCK Liam, get in here! LIAM (OFF CAMERA) Yes, sir! LIAM runs into the office. LIAM What is it sir? BROCK Have we spent any of our monthly gym equipment budget yet? LIAM Nope! We have every penny of it! BROCK Good! I'm going to be spending it on something very important! BROCK boots the computer at his desk up and navigates to the chuckvideo.biz webpage. As he does so, LIAM talks to him. LIAM What are you buying? BROCK Exercise tapes! I'm going to be nice and strong, and all the ladies will love me! LIAM That sounds like a great plan! BROCK Aha, I just got on the website! Hey, they have rush delivery here for only twenty bucks! Should I go for it? LIAM Why not? Who would want to wait? BROCK furiously types in all of the needed information into the website and clicks on the ORDER button. With that done, he leans back in his chair. BROCK Done and done. BROCK (T.H.) Exercise tapes for only a hundred bucks? This is the best investment I've made ever since I bought shares in that Team Rocket group! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The next day, BROCK is in the gym when LIAM comes in holding a package. LIAM The mail just got dropped off! Looks like the tapes are in! BROCK Awesome! Can you bring the TV out here? I don't want to work out in the office because they say you should keep your work space and your workout space separate. LIAM Who are "they"? BROCK People that know more than us, Liam. People that know more than us. BROCK (T.H.) Actually I read it in a magazine, but if Liam heard that I was actually reading something, he'd think that I'm a gigantic nerd! LIAM (T.H.) If Brock was going to say that he READ that you have to keep your work space separate from your work out space, I swear I would think he was the biggest nerd ever. LIAM hands BROCK the package and runs into the office to bring the TV out. As LIAM does that, BROCK rips open the package to find three tapes titled "Let's Chuck Tonight, Baby!" On the cover of the tapes are pictures of a shirtless Chuck with one of his fingers in his mouth. BROCK Okay... that's kind of a strange choice in cover art. LIAM runs back out with the TV, sets it up, and sees the cover art. LIAM Hey, that looks like the kind of pictures my uncle likes looking at! LIAM (T.H.) Gay? No, my uncle's not gay! He has gone through a lot of roommates though: Brad, Chad, this one guy that dressed like a girl. But again, to answer your question: no, he's not gay. BROCK Whatever. Let's put this tape in and you can watch me as I watch this. LIAM That sounds like great fun, sir! LIAM (T.H.) Sometimes on slow days, Brock will play videogames. I'm so happy he only has one control so that I can only watch him play, because I'd hate it if I had to actually play along with him! BROCK takes the tape out and places it into the VCR of the TV. CHUCK appears on the screen. CHUCK (T.V.) Hey everyone, it's me! Chuck! I hope you're ready to work that body, because it's time to Chuck tonight, baby! LIAM Yay! CHUCK (T.V.) The first exclusive exercise we'll be doing is the Chuck push up. This is exactly like a normal push up, except I'll be counting off on the TV here! As CHUCK counts off on the TV, BROCK does push ups along with the count, although he has some difficulty. After ten push ups, the count stops. BROCK I feel myself getting stronger already! CHUCK (T.V.) Good job! Now we're moving on to the next exclusive exercise: the Chuck sit up! This is just like a normal sit up, but again, I'm counting, so you have that extra motivator. Let's begin! BROCK does ten sit ups as CHUCK counts them off on the TV. LIAM This is amazing! It's like Chuck is right here in the gym with us! BROCK takes the TV remote and pauses the video. BROCK I feel like I can take on the world... and tie it! Watch me pick up one of those rocks! BROCK runs over to one of the rocks littering the floor of the gym, bends over, and attempts to pick it up. He fails. LIAM Put more knee into it! BROCK bends his knees more as he struggles to try and lift the rock, but still has no luck. BROCK Eh... it's my fault! I should have waited until I finished the video! BROCK runs back over to the TV and starts the video again. CHUCK (T.V.) Okay, those were some great sit ups! BROCK Heh, see? Chuck said those sit ups were great! CHUCK (T.V.) Next up is an exclusive exercise I like to call the Chuck jumping jack! LIAM Oh, this sounds like a good one sir! BROCK Shut up! I need to hear the instructions! LIAM Oh, I'm so sorry sir! CHUCK (T.V.) Just do regular jumping jacks, and I'll count them off! BROCK Sounds great! BROCK does ten jumping jacks as CHUCK counts them off. BROCK (T.H.) These exercise tapes are great! I don't know how I would be able to work out without them! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK is sitting in his office when LIAM walks in. LIAM That was quite the work out today, sir! Anyway, it's getting pretty late, so I'm going to head home for the night. BROCK Wait, Liam, hold on! LIAM What is it? BROCK I think I have a way for us to make loads of cash! LIAM You know I'm not in this for the money, sir! LIAM (T.H.) That's a lie. I kind of am. I didn't leave home at age ten like most Pokémon trainers do, so my parents make me pay rent and utilities. It's kind of like a big game of Monopoly! BROCK Oh, I know that, I just need your help, and I'd obviously give you a cut of the profits. LIAM Okay, what's your plan? BROCK Watching those tapes gave me an idea. I was willing to blow a hundred bucks just for tapes of a gym leader training me! Can you imagine how much people would pay to have a gym leader train them in real life? LIAM I'd have my parents mortgage off our house for that opportunity! BROCK Exactly! I'd be raking in the cash! So anyway, I made up a bunch of fliers advertising the new Brock Fitness Extravaganza program! So if you could just hang these up around the city before you go home, that'd be great. BROCK (T.H.) Liam runs a lot of errands outside the gym for me too. I don't know how I'd handle my milk curdling if it wasn't for his runs to the grocery store to buy new milk. BROCK hands the stack of fliers to LIAM. LIAM Of course! I won't disappoint you, sir! LIAM runs out. BROCK (T.H.) This is the greatest idea I've ever had. I don't see how this can go wrong. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK and LIAM stand, overseeing the gym. Various mats are placed around the gym. LIAM (T.H.) So this morning when I came in I had to clean up the entire gym, get all the exercise gear out, and basically make all the other preparations while Brock supervised. I'm so excited! BROCK (T.H.) The great thing about being a boss is that saying that you're "supervising" is a legitimate excuse to get out of doing anything! An elderly woman, HARRIET, walks into the gym. HARRIET Hello? Is this the gym? I'm looking for the fitness program. BROCK ****! What's this old fart doing here? LIAM Yes, the personal training program is going on here! BROCK (T.H.) When I set up this personal training program, I was hoping that some hot girls would show up that were mainly interested in some private "training" afterward, if you catch my drift... and my drift is sex. HARRIET My name is Harriet, by the way. BROCK Well, Harriet, the program costs two hundred dollars. HARRIET Ah, I think I have that somewhere. HARRIET rummages through her handbag until she finds the required amount of money. HARRIET Here it is! It sure is a lot, though. I guess I'm going to have to write one of my grandkids out of my will. LIAM takes the money and brings it to the office. Next, a middle aged man, MERV, walks into the gym. MERV Yeah, hip, cool Merv is here to train and become hipper and cooler! As MERV walks over to the mats, he trips and falls on a rock. MERV Ow, my back! MERV (T.H.) Am I going through a midlife crisis? Of course not! Anyone who watches this documentary will see proof of that! And I mean, that sports car I bought? I've been saving up for that my whole life? The trophy wife? I met her at a factory that makes trophies, so I only married her for the irony of it! The sunglasses and the Hawaiian shirt? Who doesn't dress like this? Finally, JOYCE walks into the gym. BROCK (T.H.) When I saw Joyce walk into the gym, I got pretty nervous. Things didn't go so well with her last time. But I know that if I put on the old Brock charm, flash a smile, give off a life maybe, I can win her over. BROCK walks over to JOYCE with a big, stupid grin on his face. JOYCE Oh... hi Brock. BROCK Joyce! Nice to see you! You come here to get fit with me? JOYCE Nope. I just dropped by because I figured it could be amusing to watch you get a chance to... interact with more people. BROCK Ahahahahaha! You're so funny, Joyce! BROCK (T.H.) Yeah, I'm going to give up on her. BROCK heads to the front of the mats, only three of which are occupied by HARRIET, MERV, and LIAM. JOYCE watches while standing in the back. BROCK Hello everyone! I'm so glad you were all able to make it to my fitness extravaganza! I'm Brock, the Pewter City Gym Leader, and I'll be training you today! Are there any questions before we start? MERV Yeah, where's the bathroom? It's getting close to three o' clock, and I always have to go number two at three o' clock. I'm like clockwork when it comes to defecating! JOYCE giggles in the back at the question. BROCK waits until she's finished to answer him. BROCK The bathroom is right by my office over there. Any other questions? HARRIET Who's that gentleman with the camera? Is he going to follow me home and try to steal my money? I don't want anyone seeing that I keep it under my mattress. HARRIET (T.H.) Please, I would like it if you stopped filming me! If you followed me to the bank, you'd learn that my PIN is 0001, and I can't have you finding that out! JOYCE laughs even harder at this question than she did at the previous one. BROCK once again waits for her to finish. BROCK Don't worry about him. Anyway, let's begin! Do we all know what a push up is? MERV Oh yeah, of course. HARRIET What's a push up? BROCK You just lay down on the floor, belly down, and use your hands to push yourself up and down. HARRIET Oh, I know that! Back in the day we used to call them press highs! BROCK Okay... let's get started already! Everyone on their mats! LIAM, HARRIET, and MERV all get into push up position. BROCK And go! LIAM, HARRIET, and MERV all start doing push ups, but LIAM is the only one able to do them. HARRIET and MERV both collapse on the floor after trying to lift themselves up once. JOYCE giggles at this. BROCK Liam, keep up the good work! Merv and Harriet, um... give it another try! BROCK (T.H.) I was expecting for the people coming to this program to be in better shape! What am I supposed to do? Train them to be fit?! MERV (T.H.) Man, I'll tell you, just trying to do that one push up made me feel stronger than I've been in ages! BROCK Okay, we're going to take a quick break. Liam, my office, please! LIAM Yes, sir! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK and LIAM enter the office. BROCK sits down. BROCK Liam, we need to figure out a way to make those two think they're getting fitter without actually making them fitter. LIAM Why can't we actually make them fitter? BROCK Because I don't know how to! LIAM Well then, we need to figure out how to make them think they're getting fitter without actually making them fitter. BROCK If I wanted you to repeat everything I said, I would have hired a Chatot. Do you have any actual ideas? At that moment, MERV walks into the office. MERV Oh, heads up there! I thought this was the bathroom. It's that time of the day and I got to go! MERV exits the office. BROCK Okay... hold up, Liam! I think I have a great idea! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA MERV and HARRIET are both on their mats when BROCK and LIAM walk back out. BROCK Okay, I have a special exercise just for you two! HARRIET What is it? Not more press highs! BROCK Nope! Both of you stand up! I know exactly how both of you are going to get into shape! MERV and HARRIET stand up. BROCK Okay, now I want both of you to walk around the gym, as slow as you can! As MERV and HARRIET begin their slow walk around the gym perimeter, with LIAM deciding to join them, BROCK approaches JOYCE. BROCK Well, Joyce, I bet you thought I was going to fail as a personal trainer, but I may be able to trick this two into thinking they're fit yet! JOYCE Trick them? So you aren't going to actually make them fit? How much did they pay for this again? BROCK You can't put a price on being deceived! Except when you buy a newspaper, I guess. JOYCE You know my friend Gladys works in the newspaper industry! I resent that comment! BROCK Oh shut it! LIAM, MERV, and HARRIET all finish their walk. HARRIET Now what? It's getting close to my bedtime! BROCK Okay, now walk around the gym, but this time don't walk so slow, and maybe... um... put more motion into your arms or something! LIAM, MERV, and HARRIET all begin walking again, this time at a quicker pace, and all of them seem very impressed. MERV Wow! The trophy wife is going to love the new, faster me! HARRIET I feel like I'm listening to one of my husband's war stories, I'm going so fast! LIAM I can't believe it! I'm going faster! It's working; it's really working! BROCK turns to JOYCE. BROCK See? I really whipped them into shape! JOYCE You didn't do anything! Of course they'd feel like they'd become faster after you told them to walk so slow before. BROCK Do you know the saying mind over matter? It means that when your exercising, it doesn't matter if you don't become stronger as long as you just think you're becoming stronger. JOYCE And with that, I'm out. I hope you felt good scamming these people out of there money. JOYCE leaves the gym, and LIAM, MERV, and HARRIET finish their lap around the gym. JOYCE (T.H.) I do not condone that sort of behavior at all. Really, my only hope is that when this documentary airs, Brock will be exposed for the big fraud that he is... and maybe that some incredibly hot guys will start returning my phone calls since I've been on TV. BROCK Great job guys! We're done! Now you're all super strong! MERV and HARRIET leave the gym. LIAM That was amazing! I can't believe how strong I am now! BROCK Liam, I told you the plan beforehand! LIAM I know! And it worked! BROCK Well, it sure does feel good to have made six hundred dollars. LIAM Six hundred? But I thought that balding guy and the old lady were the only ones who paid the two hundred dollar fee. BROCK Oh, well since you participated too, I'm going to have to get money from you as well. LIAM Okay! I'll just have to get it from my parents! BROCK (T.H.) At the end of the day, would I have rather trained my Pokémon or those people? Of course I'd rather have trained those people! They paid me handsomely in cash money! But really, it's not about that. It's about making people feel like they're better than they actually are. You think that old croon is actually going to exercise anymore once she gets home? You think that midlife crisis guy wants to put any effort into being fit? Of course not! But it's not about them doing it; it's about them thinking they can do it, and that's all that matters. Mind over matter! INT. CIANWOOD CITY GYM CHUCK (T.H.) Those tapes I produce? They're the biggest scam ever. A Chuck Push Up? I'm going to let you in on a little secret: there's no such thing as a Chuck Push Up. However, I can slap my name on anything, and people will think that those exercise tapes are actually working for them because a gym leader is telling them what to do! It's all about mind over matter, baby! |
Wow, keep these coming! The Office is my favorite TV show, and this fic is done in a style that mirrors it while still having a sense of originality! I especially like the part in episode 2 when Liam says, "I reall like he way I wrote that 'T,' though!" I would try to utilize more TH based humor like that, but that's just a minor suggestion. Great work!
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Episode 3: Spelunking INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA It's early in the morning, and BROCK and LIAM are standing in the gym. In front of LIAM are two backpacks and a variety of other items. As BROCK names a pair of items, LIAM places them into the backpacks. BROCK Hard hats? LIAM Check! BROCK Pickaxes? LIAM Check! BROCK Wine and cheese spread for a midday snack? LIAM Check! BROCK (TALKING HEAD) Today Liam and I are going on our monthly spelunking trip to Mt. Moon. One time when I was exploring Mt. Moon, I found a shiny coin. It turned out that it was worth nothing, but I figured that if I could find a worthless piece of crap, I could also find something really valuable too, so I started to organize these monthly spelunking trips. LIAM (T.H.) Spelunking is great! It's nice to get an opportunity to get out of the gym. It's like a big cave in here. Going to a real cave really relaxes me. BROCK Now then, I just want to go over some safety procedures before we head out. LIAM Yes, sir! BROCK Last time a certain someone thought it would be fun to sneak up on a Clefairy and got his *** metronomed into a week long stay at the Pewter City Hospital. Let's not tease the Pokémon this time. LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM (T.H.) I just wanted to give it a hug! But it turns out when you sneak up on someone really silently and don't give them any warning that they're about to be hugged, they don't like it! Go figure! BROCK Also, I know I don't need to remind you, but I'll say it anyway: wear your hardhat at all times when in the cave. BROCK (T.H.) The hardhat isn't just a safety tool; it's useful for flirting as well. Sometimes when I go out to Mt. Moon, a girl will come up to me and say, "Wow, is that hard hat? Are you going spelunking?" and I'll say back, "Why yes I am, and my hat isn't the only thing that's hard right now!" EXT. ROUTE 3 BROCK and LIAM have been walking along Route 3 for close to half an hour. LIAM (T.H.) My least favorite part about going spelunking is the walk there. It's an hour walk, and we're only halfway there! Some people always try and tell you that life's about the journey, not the destination, though... well screw them! BROCK Ugh, we need to start packing lighter... LIAM Maybe if we just didn't pack a snack and got some food at the cafe... BROCK Liam, I told you many times, that old lady there tried to poison me! BROCK (T.H.) Anytime an old person cooks for me, I consider it an attempt to try to poison me. They're old and they probably got all their old people germs on the food. I saved the entire Pokémon League at our annual barbecue when I tackled Agatha before she tried cooking some hot dogs. LIAM What if we bought a car? BROCK Eh, I'm waiting for the prices of those electric cars to drop. Chicks dig guys that pretend to care about the environment. LIAM Well, I've run out of ideas. BROCK That's why you're just an assistant. You know, maybe we should just consider this walk as an exercise. It's like Chuck said in those videos: we can't just stop exercising when the tapes finish. We have to find ways to exercise in our daily lives! LIAM That's why when my parents tell me to take the trash out now, I always do some squats with the garbage bag first! LIAM (T.H.) Chuck inspired me to create my own series of exercise videos about working out around the house. I've got some great ideas... like when you're washing dishes, do a squat with every dish you wash... or when you get the mail, do a squat with every piece of mail. Most of them involve squats. Also, there's the Meowth toss. It's a great idea, but I'm still looking for investors. My parents said maybe! Brock flat out said no. BROCK (T.H.) Liam's idea for exercise tapes is good in theory, but he has to work on more exercises than squats. The Meowth toss is pretty fun, though. BROCK It's about time for us to take our quick five minute break anyway. Let's stop for a moment. BROCK takes a bottle of water out of his backpack and starts to drink from it. LIAM takes his backpack off, lifts it up above his head, and starts doing squats. BROCK (T.H.) There's nothing better than a nice bottle of water after an exhausting walk... well... maybe sex. EXT. Mt. MOON ENTRANCE BROCK and LIAM finally arrive at the entrance to Mt. Moon. BROCK Oh, thank Arceus we're here! We can finally get to some serious spelunking! LIAM Yay! BROCK and LIAM are about to enter the cave when they walk by two other people on the way in, ROARK and his assistant, HEATHER. BROCK No... it can't be! ROARK Brock?! Is that you, Brock? Oh, it's so good to see you Brock! HEATHER Hi Liam. LIAM Heather. BROCK (T.H.) Roark is the worst! He's the gym leader at Oreburgh City, and he also trains Rock types! He puts on this whole facade, like he's friendly or something, but he really just feels more superior than everyone else! LIAM (T.H.) Heather and I... have a history. I don't want to talk about it. HEATHER (T.H) Yes, Liam and I do have a history. Why do you ask? BROCK What are you even doing here, Roark? Mt. Moon is way too far from Sinnoh. You should have just stayed the hell over there! HEATHER I was doing some research when I read that there are a lot of rare stones over in Mt. Moon, so I told Roark and we took a trip over. ROARK Yup! We took a boat over to Kanto, but once we hit land again, we drove over here in a rental hybrid car. You should buy one of those, you know. It's our duty to take care of the environment. BROCK Heh, is it? LIAM So did you guys find anything? We were hoping to go spelunking now. ROARK Don't worry, we left plenty for you. Heather and I did find a plethora of rare gems and stones though. Of course, we're just going to donate them to the Oreburgh City Museum. For me, spelunking isn't about getting rich; it's just about the love of the hobby. BROCK Oh, is that so? BROCK (T.H.) AAARGH! I just want to punch this guy in the face! HEATHER Are you guys doing okay? Your backpacks look heavy. BROCK No, they're fine. ROARK Oh hey, here's a tip when it comes to packing! Don't bring any food with you. There's this lovely cafe in the Mt. Moon courtyard run by this delightful elderly lady. The meal Heather and I had there was delicious. BROCK There's a cafe there? ROARK Isn't that funny? Even though Brock probably visits Mt. Moon all the time, I'm the one giving him advice like I'm the local. That's a funny situation right there, isn't it, Brock? BROCK Oh, it's sooo funny. ROARK Well, Heather and I have a long trip back to Sinnoh now, so hopefully we'll catch up with you guys later. I know I'll definitely see you at that Rock type convention coming up! I'm looking forward to it! BROCK Oh yes, me too. Bye now. HEATHER Bye Liam. ROARK (T.H.) Brock? That guy is great! Sometimes he can seem a bit antisocial, though. ROARK and HEATHER walk away. BROCK Ugh! This is terrible! That goodie-two-shoes thinks he can outdo me? LIAM I know! He's the worst! LIAM (T.H.) Actually, I think Roark is an okay guy... though I'd never say that in front of Brock. BROCK The only option we have now is to find stones even rarer than the ones Roark find and donate all of them to the Pewter City Museum! That'll show him! Let's get going, Liam! LIAM Yes, sir! BROCK and LIAM enter the cave. INT. MT. MOON BROCK and LIAM put on their hardhats and take out their pickaxes. BROCK It's spelunking time! BROCK moves over to the cave wall and starts chipping away at it. LIAM Hey, wouldn't it be better if we went deeper into the cave? There are probably more rare stones there than here, right at the entrance. BROCK True, but if we go spelunking here it's quicker for us to leave, and we won't get lost in the complicated system of tunnels built into the mountain. LIAM Wow, sir! You're always thinking! That's a great plan! BROCK (T.H.) I don't get why he just suggested that now when we've been spelunking like ten times already! LIAM joins BROCK in chipping away at the cave wall. LIAM Hey, you know what would be cool? If we started singing a song to the beat of our pickaxes hitting the cave! BROCK That's a terrible idea. LIAM decides to sing anyway. LIAM I'm in Mt. Moon... I'm going spelunking... will I find something... I don't really know... maybe a rock... or a nice stone... BROCK decides to join in. BROCK Or maybe a nice girl... that I can bone! LIAM (T.H.) The song was going pretty well... until Brock ruined it. He shouldn't quit his day job... because then I'd be out of a day job too. BROCK (T.H.) Yes, I did say that singing a song would be a terrible idea... but interrupting Liam always makes him stop! LIAM Well now I need something else to do in order to pass the time! BROCK What do you mean? You should be having fun just spelunking! LIAM Spelunking isn't fun if we're just going to chip away at rock! That isn't even real spelunking! BROCK Fine! You want to go REAL spelunking?! Let's do that! Put away your pickax! We're moving out! LIAM Uh... okay. LIAM (T.H.) I'm really scared to go real spelunking now for some reason. BROCK and LIAM are walking down the cave path. BROCK Boy, this tunnel sure is long! And dark too! Who knows where we are? We may even be lost! But at least it's REAL spelunking, so it's sooo much fun! LIAM Why do I have a feeling you don't really think so, sir? BROCK Nope! This is great! As the two walk, LIAM happens to kick a stone. LIAM What's that? LIAM runs to the stone and picks it up. LIAM Wow! This looks like a moon stone! BROCK takes the stone from LIAM and examines it. BROCK Yeah, it is a moon stone. So who cares? This is Mt. MOON, the place is lousy with them. You think the Pewter City Museum would give a damn if I donated a moon stone? We need something spectacular! BROCK throws the moon stone away. LIAM Hey, maybe I wanted to keep that! BROCK Please, it's worthless anyway! LIAM Hmph. LIAM (T.H.) Usually things between Brock and I go pretty swell. Today? Not so much. BROCK and LIAM now reach a crossroads in the tunnel. BROCK Now is a good time for that snack I packed. BROCK opens up his backpack to take out a cheese and cracker platter, a bottle of wine, and a wine glass. BROCK and LIAM begin snacking on the cheese and crackers. BROCK (T.H.) At least I still have my snacks. The only way this day could get worse is if I had to eat at the old fart's cafe. As BROCK pours himself a glass of wine, LIAM complains. LIAM Is there anything there that I can drink, sir? BROCK Water. LIAM But I don't like drinking water with my snacks! I like to keep my snack drinks and my hydration drinks different. BROCK Tough, kid. All I have is water. LIAM Why didn't you pack a juice box for me or something? BROCK What, am I your babysitter now? Want me to change your diaper too?! LIAM Hey, don't make fun of that! I finally got off the diaper three months ago! BROCK Well good for you! LIAM It was good for me! Why would finally not having to wear diapers be bad for me?! BROCK I don't know! LIAM You don't know anything! You're an idiot, Brock! LIAM takes the wine glass and throws it at the ground, smashing it into pieces. BROCK Great! Now I have to drink the wine straight out of the bottle! Do you know how unsanitary that is?! LIAM No, I don't! I don't even drink wine! How should I know?! BROCK You should still keep up with health reports! LIAM picks up his backpack and stands up. LIAM I've had enough of this! I'm going spelunking by myself! Don't follow me! LIAM goes down one of the tunnel paths. BROCK yells at him. BROCK Fine! I'll definitely find something cool on the other path anyway! But I better finish this cheese platter first. BROCK (T.H.) Sheesh, this tunnel sure has a lot of echo. I hope no one else heard all of that! Also, I really can't believe he doesn't keep up with health reports. That's just plain old negligent of him. INT. MT MOON CAVERN BROCK finds himself walking into a great big cavernous chamber of Mt. Moon. Some holes in the ceiling of the room provide natural light. BROCK (T.H.) Well, I'm lost. I hope you're keeping track of where we've been, cameraman. BROCK explores the chamber, when in the middle of the chamber he finds a large, shiny stone. BROCK Wow! This looks like just the sort of thing I could donate to the Pewter City Museum! I wonder what it is? MISTY (Off CAMERA) It's mine! The redheaded gym leader, MISTY, appears in the cavern and approaches BROCK. MISTY Hands off my find, Brock! BROCK Misty? What are you doing here?! BROCK (T.H.) Misty is the gym leader at Cerulean City. I have to put up with her whenever we hold league events. She's always stopping me from flirting with other girls. I think it's because she has the hots for me. Also, her sisters are totally hot. MISTY (T.H.) Brock and I...? Oh... no. No. Just... no. Where would you even get that idea? MISTY Brock, you know what I could do with a rock like this? Make money! The Cerulean City Gym could use some renovations. Have you seen the place recently? It's basically a giant pit filled with water. And I haven't cleaned the water in ages. BROCK That's so greedy of you! I just want to find something that I can donate to the Pewter City Museum! And also, you should replace pool water with new water every six months. BROCK (T.H.) People really need to read more health reports. MISTY Charity work? Are you for real? That's way too unlike you, Brock! You didn't happen to run into Roark on the way here? BROCK Why would you even think that?! You think the only reason I would want to do charity work is to upstage Roark? I take offense to that! MISTY Heh, whatever. I guess if you want this rock so bad, we can battle for it. BROCK You know that's not fair! All of your Pokémon have a type advantage over mine! MISTY Oh, I thought you were going to say it's not fair because you suck at Pokémon battling. I see your excuses have improved, at least. BROCK Just let me take that stone, Misty! As a Rock type gym leader, I deserve it! MISTY Deserve it? It's not like you have some Arceus-given right to just take the stone from me! MISTY (T.H.) Trying to reason with Brock is like trying to reason with a child... but at least you can shut the kid up with some candy. BROCK You weren't even here when I found it! MISTY That's because I was having lunch in the courtyard. There's this great cafe run by this old woman. BROCK Why does everyone think that place is so good?! MISTY Because not everyone tried to tackle Agatha when she just wanted to grill some hot dogs, Brock. BROCK We were all at risk! MISTY Please, you were only at risk of eating some high sodium content garbage. BROCK (T.H.) And high sodium intake is bad for you! Once again: health reports! BROCK Whatever. We're still no closer to solving this whole puzzle of how has ownership of this stone. MISTY There's nothing to solve. It's mine. BROCK We kind of left it open ended. MISTY We didn't. The stone is clearly mine. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be taking this back to Cerulean City. LIAM (OFF CAMERA) Not so fast! LIAM appears in the cavern. LIAM That stone is mine! MISTY Brock, your assistant is here too? Why weren't you guys together? LIAM I had to go to the bathroom, so I went off to find a hole that I could pee in. But before I had left, I had found this stone and claimed it as my own. LIAM (T.H.) All of that is a lie. I just felt really bad about getting mad at Brock like that. Then I got lost, happened upon this scene, and improvised. MISTY Ugh, I didn't need to hear that story about you having to relieve yourself. Anyway, since stone ownership laws are so lax, I guess it's yours now, Brock's assistant. Go crazy with it. MISTY (T.H.) Please, I was bluffing the whole time. I couldn't care less about that rock. I don't even know if it's worth anything. But, I found a ton of gold pieces in the corner of this room, and when I came back from lunch and saw Brock in here, I had to distract his ridiculously simple mind with any means necessary. Why didn't I just take the gold pieces with me in the first place? Um... LIAM Brock, I'm sorry I ever left you! Do you hate me for everything I said? BROCK Hate you? You managed to get this marvelous stone away from that ***** over there! You're a genius! BROCK (T.H.) Sometimes, Liam can get on my nerves. He's too eager to please, and I can't tell whether it's out of general admiration for me or greedy ambition. Sometimes, like today, he's too whiny. But other times, also like today, he can be pretty useful to have around. And I love pissing off Misty. MISTY Hey, I'm still here, guys. And "that *****" has a name! It's Misty! BROCK Oh, no one cares about you, menstruating redhead! Let's go, Liam! LIAM Yes, sir! BROCK Oh yeah, but I'm going to need you to carry that stone for me. LIAM Not a problem, sir! BROCK Oh yeah, and by the way, Liam, do you know the way out? LIAM Nope! I haven't a clue, sir! BROCK Eh, that's okay. I'm sure the cameraman knows. LIAM picks up the stone, and he and BROCK leave the cavern. MISTY Well, at least I still have my gold. MISTY walks over to the corner of the cavern. MISTY Wait, where is it? Where did the gold go?! LIAM (T.H.) When I first got into that cavern, before I said anything, I spotted some gold pieces and I figured why not? So I put them in my backpack. I'm hoping I can use these to finance those exercise videos! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is in the center of the gym, doing squats with the large, shiny stone, when BROCK comes out from his office. BROCK I just got off the phone with the Pewter City Museum. Someone's going to be over soon to check out this rock and see if it's worth being donated to the museum. LIAM puts the stone down. LIAM That's excellent, sir! That would definitely show that Roark who's the best Rock gym leader around! BROCK That's right! It's me! And then Roxanne. And then Roark. Because he's the worst! LIAM He sure is! BROCK Anyway, I think I'm going to put a moratorium on spelunking trips for a while. I mean, hopefully this rock we found will give us a big enough spelunking kick that we don't have to go to Mt. Moon anytime soon, right? LIAM Right, sir! BROCK Anyway, can you go check if the mail's here? LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM runs out of the gym to go get the mail as BROCK watches on. LIAM returns, carrying some envelopes in his hand. LIAM Here you go, Brock! Oh wait... hold on a second! I have to squat with these first! LIAM begins to squat with each envelope as BROCK watches him, baffled. BROCK (T.H.) That was one of the most taxing spelunking trips I've ever been on. I swear, if the museum doesn't accept this as a donation, I'm going to flip a **** on someone. Preferably Roark. Maybe I'll fart in an envelope and send it to him... nah, farts don't keep well going through the postal system. Oh, you know what? He's always sending me these stupid newspaper clippings of articles that he's mentioned in. Maybe I'll type up a fake newspaper article about how much he sucks! INT. OREBURGH CITY GYM ROARK is busy cleaning up the gym when HEATHER walks in, carrying a box of newspapers. HEATHER Good news, Roark, you made the front page! HEATHER places the box on the floor and lifts a paper up to show ROARK the headline: "LOCAL GYM LEADER AND PHILANTHROPIST MAKES MUSEUM DONATION". HEATHER (T.H.) I don't get why Roark always makes a big deal whenever he makes a headline in the newspaper. He owns the local press. ROARK Gee, it sure feels good to see recognition of a job well done! I wonder if Brock found anything when he went spelunking? HEATHER Probably not. ROARK Now why would you say that? Brock's a great guy, and I'm sure he could accomplish anything if he put his mind towards it! ROARK (T.H.) For me, the most important quality to have as a gym leader slash philanthropist is positive thinking. Starving kids in underdeveloped countries? I'm sure someone will eventually open up a McDonald's franchise there. Global warming? Would anyone actually want global cooling instead? Positive thinking can basically solve any problem in the world. HEATHER So what should we do with all this newspapers anyway? ROARK I know! How about we clip the article out and send them to people! I'm sure Brock would love to hear that our spelunking missions was a success, for example! HEATHER You really like that guy, don't you? ROARK I've told you before, he's a great guy! You should talk to him more! HEATHER I'm afraid he'd hit on me like every other female he sets his eyes on. ROARK Heh, I don't think he's a lecherous rascal! He just gets very enthusiastic about women, that's all! HEATHER Whatever you say, Roark. ROARK But I told you what I said: he's not lecherous; he's just enthusiastic! HEATHER I heard you the first time! ROARK Oh, sorry then. But speaking of hearing, you should get your ears examined! Current health reports say you should go for a yearly hearing check up! ROARK (T.H.) By the way, I LOVE health reports! I always try to get Brock to read them too, but he claims he hates them. He doesn't know what he's missing! |
Hokay, so I decided to sit down and read through this entire shebang because I saw it get nominated for lulzy awards on SPPf's awards shindig. Yay to getting a head start on figuring out who to vote for, amirite?
Let me start off by saying that the format's actually fine by me. See, the unwritten rule about formatting more applies to prose. This is because prose usually deals with larger chunks of uninterrupted text and a lack of visual signals (e.g., capslocked character names to draw a reader's eye directly to it). So, in other words, the reason why centering prose is a faux pas is because the reader has to stare at huge, unbroken chunks of text in weird alignment, whereas script formatting tends to feed a reader text in smaller pieces. I'm not even sure if I'm making sense here, but the short of it is you can do it this way without much of a problem. It helps that scripts are normally formatted like this (albeit with the lines themselves left-aligned in some plays) anyway, so a person reading a script just knows that it needs to be read differently compared to a book. Speaking of script formatting, thank you for understanding that script =/= chat fic. :| Seriously, this is basically how a script is meant to be done. You don't go overboard with the outside details, but you're not really lazy about it. To be a bit more specific, I could basically picture exactly what's going on. You're careful to only write information in the stage directions that are absolutely necessary. For example, you might have Brock chugging a white wine spritzer because it's necessary for the actor to know what he should be doing at that point, but you don't bother to describe Joyce (beyond the fact that she's blonde – a detail that would be useful to the casting director) because it's not important for the actress to know what she looks like. Moreover, you realize that you need a balance of stage directions (the ones that are necessary for the actors to use, anyway) and dialogue. It's the latter that most newbie authors tend to forget, so they end up with fics that can't be reproduced on stage or for a camera because there's just nothing to act out. Tl;dr, thank you for actually writing a decent script fic. Beyond that, let me just talk about the characters for a moment. I have to admit, I don't normally like OOC fic, but this is one of the rare cases where it's done correctly. You do it for the lulz, and you're consistent with the entire thought that (almost) everyone is an idiot. I have to admit, I loved watching Brock and Liam's shenanigans, and although I'm not a big fan of The Office, I can definitely see some influence in their dialogue, particularly in their talking-head moments. The third chapter was especially awesome for this thanks to the interactions between Brock and Roark. (I love the idea of Roark being both a jackass who believes he's a philanthropist and oblivious to how offensive he actually is at the same time. That entire line where he says he's sure a McDonald's franchise will open up to solve hunger? Pure gold there.) My only qualm when it comes to characterization is that I have to agree with bobandbill on a level. It feels like almost everyone is an idiot in this world, so there's so far very little consequences to their stupidity. That's why the first chapter rubbed me the wrong way a little – because I was reading the editor-in-chief's scene as just him humoring Liam (and maybe setting up for a bit of pwning) until I realized that he actually was as stupid as Brock and Liam were. Of course, this might just be another bit of Office flavor thrown in, and you might have something planned further down the line that answers this. Or maybe even the entire point of it is that Brock just never experiences consequences for his kind of behavior. It's still a bit too early to say, but I'm interested in seeing how you handle this kind of thing in future chapters. In short, I have to say this was all kinds of awesome, and it definitely deserves those nominations. It's clear that you're very careful in building your characters, and the characters are definitely what drives this entire thing (especially thanks to its episodic nature). The humor is actually funny, and the antics aren't actually cringe-inducing. In short, it's really refreshing to see both a script fic done well and a comedy that makes me laugh, and this succeeds in both of areas. I'll be keeping an eye on this one to see where you take it from here. |
Hey, Godot! :D Wanted to read this fic and now I finally have the chance to do it! Okay, this review is broken into three parts as I'm reviewing each chapter.
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I enjoyed the first chapter very much. I like the scenario starting off with the article and Brock and Liam able to deal with that (for now). Brock being a pervert also amuses me very much so, haha. Chapter Two Quote:
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Haha, I knew Brock’s idea is going to backfire, but I still enjoy this episode very much. The old elderly people are such fun characters, even if they only appeared for a little bit. Chapter 3 Quote:
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I admit, for this chapter I got tired of Brock’s perverted jokes, but I guess he can’t help it, heh. Actually, I still enjoyed the jokes, but I guess he's losing steam. XD Cone on Brock, you can come up with better pervert jokes. :P Misty and Roark’s appearance are fun though and I like their interactions with Brock. I feel sorry for Misty though that her gold got stolen. :P The last part is my favorite in the third chapter because of him actually owning the press and his positive thinking, hehe. Overall, I’m liking this so far. Like Jax, very refreshing to see a comedy script done very well. I read your past comedy stories and this is your best one very far! It’s very nice that each episode has Brock and Liam do something different and reading the results of that. Real quick, I notice that both bobandbill and Jax are concern about almost everyone being an idiot. I'm actually not concern over it too much because like you said, in comedies the Antagonistic like characters tend to be the smarter ones. Also, I'm pretty sure Brock will have to deal with his incompetence (and with hilarious results :P). Well, nothing else to say but that I'm looking forward to more! |
The next two installments certainly amused me again. =) I rather liked the second one with the fitness videos - that was rather well structured I thought, and I felt it was funnier than the third one - but that's not to say the 3rd one wasn't funny either. =p Certainly the episodic format of the episodes fit pretty well and well-paced as well in my opinion.
Brock and Liam continue to amuse as well, and I am looking forward to seeing your spin on other gym leaders as well - it's neat to see them mentioned in this fic gradually, and as such I must echo Jax's sentiments on Roark as he's the most amusing minor character thus far for me, and he had some hilarious lines at the end there as well. =) Certainly Office-esque. The other minor characters in the 2nd and 3rd installments were better portrayed than the others in the first one I thought too - more interesting and more personality to them beyond the typical stupid person mould. Quote:
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I guess Brock at least knows how to rhyme? I'd add in a full stop or ellipse after 'stone' though, and 'a' over 'I' there. Quote:
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All in all it's certainly still amusing - keep it up! |
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA lots of reviews and this forum doesn't have multiquote I think!!! D:
First off, I'm thinking of changing the title to "The Gym: A Fanfic NOT Written By Shadow_Angel". :P Jax, I'd like to thank you for complimenting the script. I'm pretty sure this is the first scriptfic in Pokemon fanfiction history that isn't a talk show or just some random crap thrown together by the other. On the OOC-ness, I really don't care. In the games, the gym leaders have hardly any personality as it is (Koga's a ninja, Lt. Surge is AMERICAN!!!), so really I just threw everything out about them and started from scratch. On all the idiots in this fic, I feel that from Episode 2 on they at least start being idiots with personality. In Episode 2 we got Merv and Harriet, and Episode 4 features even more new townspeople of Pewter that are just as ridiculous as they are. I also really like to make these guys recurring characters too, even if they do just pop up in maybe one episode afterward. So thanks for the review, Jax. :3 Bay, I know you've read my older stuff, so I'm glad to see you think this is the best, because I also believe this is the best I've ever written. Also, I don't think Brock is very perverted in episode 4, so you can look forward to that. :P Thanks for the review as well. :3 Bob and or Bill, I'll agree with you that the third was the least funny of the bunch. That's probably because on my "Master Document" with all the plot points listed, all I had written for Episode 3 was "Brock and Liam go to Mt. Moon in order to find some Moon Stones and fossils, but instead run into trouble when they bump into Misty." Of course, as I started writing, I figured that wasn't much of a plot, so the whole Brock-Liam conflict was added in. :P But I really do like Episode 2, because of how outlandish the plot is. I already mentioned the minor characters in my comments on Jax's reviews, so I won't bring them up again here. ;O But you'll probably be happy to know that Roark comes back and plays a pivotal part in Episodes 6 and 7. :O And thanks for the review as well. :3 Episode 4 will probably be posted today. Look forward to it! ^_^ |
Episode 4: The Challenger INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK and LIAM are talking in the arena. BROCK So the other day I was walking down the street and I saw this girl with a great caboose walking in front of me. LIAM Oh, really? LIAM (TALKING HEAD) Brock's stories about girls always end disastrously. One time he ended up hitting on a grandma. Another time he ended up hitting on HIS grandma. Don't even ask me how that happened. BROCK Yeah. So I whistle at her and she turns around. Turns out it was a guy with a really long haircut. LIAM (T.H.) I told you so. BROCK So now I may or may not be accused of sexual harassment. I told the guy my name was Biff Heartengale, so I'm hoping he doesn't find me. LIAM That's good, sir. BROCK But anyway, that's only the first outrageous thing that happened to me that day. You see, I ran into my grandma again... A knocking noise is heard coming from the gym door. BROCK Who the hell could that be? BROCK (T.H.) I can't believe someone managed to interrupt one of my famous stories about my grandma. You can't believe how many times I've mistaken her for someone else! A much more attractive someone else, by the way. LIAM We don't have anyone scheduled to visit, do we, sir? BROCK That means it could only be someone looking for a gym battle... ****. LIAM What excuse do we use this time, sir? BROCK Hm... last time I used "foreigner converting the gym into a Denny's franchise". I think I may have something new up my sleeve. BROCK goes over to the door and opens it. A teenage trainer, HAL, is waiting at the door. HAL Hi, my name's Hal. You're Brock, right? I want a gym battle. BROCK Brock... DON'T SAY THAT NAME AGAIN AROUND ME! HAL Um... what? BROCK I'm his brother. Well, I was his brother, but then he had to go and die. As his last remaining relative, I got stuck with all his stuff, including his bastard lovechild! BROCK points at LIAM. BROCK Look at that hideous child! I don't want to raise him! I don't have time! I'm a successful millionaire playboy! Now get out of my life, Hal! BROCK slams the door shut on HAL. LIAM Bravo, sir! Excellent performance! LIAM (T.H.) That was honestly one of the best performances Brock has ever done, only beaten by "drunken hobo using the gym as a shelter" and "gay barkeep converting the gym into a nightclub". BROCK I always try my best. More knocking is heard on the door. LIAM Why is he still knocking? BROCK I don't know. Maybe he thinks Brock's brother will give him a badge out of pity or something. Just wait for the knocking to stop. BROCK and LIAM wait, but the knocking does not stop. BROCK I guess I didn't make myself clear to him. Hold on, I'll finish this. BROCK goes to open the door, and when he does, HAL barges right into the gym. HAL Listen here, Brock! I've heard stories about you before! My cousin is a reporter for the Pewter City Gazette and she told me about how you're always trying to trick challengers into thinking the gym is closed! That **** isn't going to work on me! I demand a match now! LIAM Er... BROCK Hello my name is a Vlad, nice to meet, thank you! HAL Your name is Brock! Battle me! Now! LIAM Dammit, sir! Do something! LIAM (T.H.) He shouldn't have changed his story to being a foreigner named Vlad. Bad things always happen when you switch boats midstream. BROCK You know what, Hal? I am Brock! And I was testing you the whole time! You fail! I don't like the tone of voice you took with me! It was very rude. HAL That's a lie! You can't just pick and choose who to battle based on some silly test you just came up with right now! BROCK Grr... Liam! My office! Now! LIAM Yes, sir! BROCK and LIAM march into the office. HAL I'm not leaving until you battle me, just so you know! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK and LIAM enter the office. BROCK plops right down into his chair, leaving LIAM standing. BROCK Liam, when was the last time I had to actually battle someone? LIAM Um... I don't know, sir. BROCK Maybe we can tell him that we aren't ready for a battle yet, then put up a sign saying the building was sold, and next time he comes back, he'll just leave thinking the gym has moved. LIAM This guy seems sharp. I don't think he'll fall for that. BROCK I don't want to actually battle this guy! All that I've been working for would be for naught! BROCK (T.H.) More like all I HAVEN'T been working for, heh. LIAM Sir, this guy isn't going to take no for an answer. BROCK Fine, I'll battle him and get this over with. Hopefully it'll be quick. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK and LIAM walk back into the arena. HAL About time you guys got out of there. I don't want to wait around all day for this battle! BROCK Don't worry, I'm going to battle you now. Liam, can you be the referee? LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM (T.H.) The very few times that Brock has took on a challenger, I've always been the referee. I guess it kind of makes me like the fat kid at recess! BROCK and HAL head over to opposite sides of the arena. LIAM This will be a two on two battle! Um... are there any other rules, sir? BROCK Er... I can't remember. HAL Let's just get this over with already! HAL (T.H.) Trying to get a battle with this Brock guy is like pulling teeth! BROCK Okay, well, I'll choose my Pokémon first, and that way you'll be so intimidated when you see him, that you'll just want to surrender, and not have a battle at all! And then we'll all go home happy! HAL I doubt that. BROCK We'll see! Go, Geodude! BROCK throws a Pokéball and releases GEODUDE, the floating Rock type. GEODUDE Geodude dude! HAL Just like I expected! Go, Bulbasaur! HAL throws a Pokéball and releases BULBASAUR, a strange Grass and Poison type creature with a bulb growing on its back. BROCK A Bulbasaur, eh? Did you know that a group of Bulbasaur is called Bulbasaurs? I bet you're so impressed with my Pokémon knowledge that you're just going to allow me the victory now! HAL That's not happening. Bulbasaur, just use vine whip on the damn thing. BULBASAUR Bulba! The bulb on the back of BULBASAUR opens up, releasing a vine. The vine flies straight at GEODUDE and starts smacking it around. GEODUDE cries out in pain... GEODUDE Geodude! ... and collapses to the ground, fainted. BROCK You just got lucky. I gave my Geodude some weird new Pokémon food last night that caused it to have really bad gas. He wasn't in the best fighting condition. LIAM (T.H.) The strange thing about that was that Brock wasn't making that up! I tried some and I was in the can for an hour afterward! LIAM Well, regardless, Geodude is unable to battle! Bulbasaur is the victor! Sorry, sir. BROCK That's okay! Not all of my Pokémon have fainted yet! BROCK returns GEODUDE to its Pokéball. BROCK You know, Hal, my next Pokémon is even tougher. It's not too late to surrender. There's nothing wrong with giving up. I do it all the time. HAL I'm pretty sure I want to go through with this. BROCK Whatever you say. Go, Onix! BROCK throws a Pokéball that releases ONIX, a Rock type Pokémon that looks much like a towering snake made out of stones. ONIX Onix! On Onix! BROCK Did you know that Onixes like to smell other Onixes' butts? If Onix didn't scare you, I'm sure my impressive knowledge of Pokémon did! HAL That was even worse than your last fact! BROCK Listen buddy, if I had another Onix here I could prove it to you! HAL I really don't care if you're making up those facts or not; I just want a badge. Bulbasaur, use vine whip again! Once again BULBASAUR released its vine, and it whipped the mighty Onix around. ONIX Onix! BROCK Hang in there, Onix! Chase after Bulbasaur and use wrap! ONIX On, Onix! After roaring, Onix gets up and attempts to chase Bulbasaur. As soon as it gets close, however, Bulbasaur scurries out of the way. Onix, however, had already made a lunge at it, and ends up collapsing on the gym floor. HAL Heh, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. BROCK The same goes for fat chicks in the bedroom! HAL Whatever. Bulbasaur, finish this up. BULBASAUR Bulba, bulb! Once again, BULBASAUR whips ONIX around with its vine. ONIX Onix! ONIX closes its eyes, defeated. BROCK You know, the referee hasn't made a call yet. It still isn't too late to surrender! HAL I think I'll take my chances waiting. LIAM Onix is unable to battle! The victor is Bulbasaur, and the victory goes to Hal. BROCK Are you sure about that, Liam? Did he break any obscure rules that we haven't heard about until right now? LIAM I don't think so, sir. BROCK Dammit, Liam, didn't you get the hint? You were supposed to make some rule up! LIAM Oh, I'm really sorry, sir! That won't happen again! BROCK returns ONIX to its Pokéball as HAL returns BULBASAUR to its Pokéball. HAL Well, it looks like I won. Can someone give me my badge now? BROCK Uh... Liam? Can you get a Boulder Badge from my office, please? LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM runs off. HAL Don't I get a cash prize and a technical machine, too? BROCK Listen kid, I haven't done one of these gym battles in a while. Give me a break. LIAM comes back with a Boulder Badge and gives it to BROCK. BROCK Hal of wherever the hell you're from, I bestow you with this Boulder Badge. Now get the hell out of here. BROCK hands HAL the badge and pushes him away. HAL About time... HAL stomps out of the gym. BROCK (T.H.) You can't win them all, but I my case it seems like I can't win some either. I can't win at all! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE The next morning, BROCK is at his desk, sleeping, when LIAM walks in. LIAM Sir, I have some bad news! BROCK jumps up awake. BROCK Whah! Huh... oh Liam, is it tomorrow already? LIAM Sir, I have some bad news! BROCK What is it? LIAM There's a line of people waiting outside the gym, and I think they all want to challenge you for a badge. BROCK Preposterous. The people of Pewter City know better. It's common knowledge that I avoid gym battles no matter what. LIAM Unfortunately, sir, the news has painted a different picture. LIAM picks up the TV remote and turns it on. An image of a news anchor, DIRK, appears on the screen. DIRK (T.V.) Hello, I'm Dirk, and this is GNN, the Generic News Network. Our top story today... The TV screen cuts to footage filmed outside the Pewter City Gym. BROCK Hey! Look! That's the gym! Our building got on TV! LIAM Shhh! Listen, sir! DIRK (Voice over) This footage was filmed by the paparazzi outside the Pewter City Gym, as there was an anonymous tip that any celebrity other than Brock was going to be there. However, something much more shocking was shot... The footage cuts to HAL exiting the gym. The footage zooms up on HAL, where it is seen that he is clearly holding a Boulder Badge. DIRK (V.O.) Look at that folks! A Boulder Badge! They've been thought of as rarer than Mew in recent times! This could only mean that Brock has finally stopped ********ting around and started accepting challengers again! So hurry up and rush on down to the Pewter City Gym before he changes his mind! BROCK grabs the remote from LIAM and shuts the TV off. BROCK My mind was already changed after that battle yesterday! I'm not going to battle anyone! How bad is this line outside, Liam? LIAM It's pretty scary, sir. I'd say it's about twenty people long. BROCK Twenty people long... ugh! BROCK bangs his head on his desk as LIAM takes back the remote and starts doing squats with it. BROCK What do I do? What do I do?! LIAM answers BROCK as he continues to do squats. LIAM That Hal guy didn't fall for any of our tricks, but maybe those people outside will! BROCK That's true. Most people are idiots. We're living proof of that! LIAM finishes his squats and places the remote down. LIAM So do you have anything in mind to trick them, sir? BROCK Well... I may have something up my sleeve. EXT. PEWTER CITY GYM LIAM exits the gym and finds a large line waiting for him. Among the people waiting in line are ARTIE, an obese kid, DALLAS, a twenty-something wearing a cowboy hat and a bolo tie, and MERV, in his trademark sunglasses and Hawaiian shirt. MERV Hey, how long are we going to be waiting in line? If it gets to three o' clock I'm going to have to leave to do you-know-what and I don't think anyone would be willing to save my spot! ARTIE Artie hungry. Artie should have brought more snacks for line. LIAM Everyone calm down! Brock will be letting people in shortly! DALLAS Hey kid, come over here for a sec'. LIAM walks over to DALLAS in the front of the line. DALLAS Howdy kid. The name's Dallas. LIAM I'm Liam. DALLAS Well lissen' here, Liam. I'm from the far off Orre region, and as soon as I heard that Brock was offerin' gym badges again, I hustled over here faster than an Arbok on a skateboard. LIAM (T.H.) I don't think Arboks can ride skateboards... and I don't think Dallas is a real name. This guy is weird. LIAM Get to your point. DALLAS Well lissen' kid, I've heard that Brock's shenanigans are legendary round these parts, and if he tries to pull a fast one on me, I ain't fallin' for it. LIAM I'm sure you won't, Mr. Dallas, as you seem like a very intelligent man who has a real name. DALLAS Thank you kindly. DALLAS (T.H.) I'm pretty excited to be Pokémon battlin' 'round these parts! I've never been somewhere with indoor plumbing before. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM walks back into the gym. BROCK is waiting for him. LIAM Well, sir, there's quite the eccentric cast of characters waiting out there for a battle. BROCK None of them are getting one. LIAM There was this one guy who seemed pretty persistent. His name was Dallas. BROCK Never trust someone named after a city, Liam. LIAM Yes, sir! Anyway, is everything all set up out here? Should I let them in? BROCK Give me a couple more minutes. LIAM Yes, sir. BROCK (T.H.) The key to deception on a large scale is to take advantage of mob mentality. If you can get one idiot to fall for it, you can get all of the idiots to fall for it. EXT. PEWTER CITY GYM LIAM exits the gym once again to find the crowd even more restless than before. ARTIE Artie want something to eat! Artie's tummy is rumbling! DALLAS C'mon kid, let us in this here gym already! MERV Does anyone know what time it is?! LIAM Everyone calm down! Now does anyone have some food we can give to the fat guy? MERV I always have a hamburger on me... not to eat, of course! The trophy wife wants me to watch my figure! LIAM walks over to MERV. LIAM Give it to me. MERV Well I don't know... I was saving it... LIAM grabs the hamburger from MERV and brings it over to ARTIE, shoving it in his face. LIAM Here you go, now shut up! ARTIE downs the hamburger in one gulp. ARTIE Mmm, that hamburger was succulent. Oh no, I must apologize for my previous, Neanderthal-type behavior. My name is Artie, and I usually do not refer to myself in the third person. You see, I am what some may call a trencherman, a gourmand, if you will, and when I start developing a voracious appetite... LIAM Enough out of you! Brock should be ready for everyone to come into the gym now. Now if everyone can please enter in an... LIAM sighs as the line of trainers waiting for a battle rushes into the gym. LIAM follows them in afterward. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The trainers start milling around the gym. BROCK walks around, and notices MERV among the trainers waiting for a battle. BROCK Merv?! What are you doing here? MERV Oh hey Brock! First off, I just want to thank you again for that fitness program. Best two hundred I've ever spent in my life... well except for the cash I spent on the trophy wife. BROCK But you're battling now? MERV Yeah, I thought that becoming a top Pokémon trainer would really impress the trophy wife, and I can't see any problems with going on a long journey at my age! Hey, do you happen to know what time it is, because I'd like to battle before... BROCK Not now. BROCK pushes MERV away. MERV (T.H.) Hey cameraman, do you happen to have the time? I think people are underestimating how important this is for me to know... DALLAS pushes himself through the crowd to get to BROCK. DALLAS Are you who they call Brock 'round these parts? BROCK They call me Brock around all parts. DALLAS Howdy then! The name's Dallas, and I'm more pleased than a Spheal on a snow day to meet you! BROCK (T.H.) What the hell is this guy talking about? Why would a Spheal care about a snow day? Spheals don't go to school! BROCK So what do you want with me? DALLAS I just want ya' to know that I've heard about your tricks and I ain't gonna fall for any of them! BROCK That's lovely. Can you just wait here, please? BROCK moves to the front of the gym and calls out for everyone. BROCK Excuse me! Everyone! I'd just like you all to know that battles will begin shor- Suddenly, BROCK drops to the floor. A bottle of some sort falls out from under his sleeve. ARTIE Good heavens! What events are conspiring here?! MERV He's dead! Brock must be dead! LIAM runs over and picks up the bottle. LIAM Look at these! Pills! Brock must have driven himself to suicide because of all the stress placed on him from everyone who wanted a battle with him! Gym's closed, everyone! ARTIE The death of a gym leader... I feel so lachrymose! MERV Well this is just great! The trophy wife better not want a divorce now! All the trainers except for DALLAS grumpily leave the gym. LIAM Dallas, didn't you hear? The gym is closed now! DALLAS What ya' take me for, some kinda dummy? I told ya' I wasn't gonna fall for no tricks or pranks! I want my gym battle! LIAM Dammit. Sir, get up. What do we do about this guy? BROCK opens his eyes and and gets up from the floor. BROCK Can't you see I just don't want to battle you, Dallas? Can't you just leave us alone?! DALLAS I came here for a battle and I reckon I should get a battle. BROCK Fine! I'll battle you, you pain in the ***! But do you mind if we just have a one on one battle? DALLAS Why yes I do! It got to be a two on two battle! BROCK Why? It doesn't even look like you have any Pokéballs on you! DALLAS Pokéballs?! Don't tell me ya' thought I was gonna fight with Pokémon! I don't need 'em. I got my fists! I named my left one Houston and my right one San Antonio. BROCK I'm not going to let you fight my Pokémon by yourself. Get out of here. DALLAS Fine, but you'll rue the day when you denied Dallas a match! DALLAS storms out of the gym. LIAM Good job, sir! All those people out there and you didn't have to battle any of them! BROCK A lesser gym leader would have accepted all of their challenges... but not me! LIAM That's why you're the best, sir! BROCK (T.H.) It's days like these when I'm proud to be a gym leader. As the Pewter City Gym Leader, it's my job to defend the Boulder Badge, and today I did a pretty fine job of that! LIAM Sir, do you think they'll report you dead in the news tomorrow? BROCK We can only hope, Liam. We can only hope. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE The next day, BROCK is once again sleeping at his desk when LIAM rushes in. LIAM Sir, turn on the TV! Turn on the TV! BROCK jumps up from his desk! BROCK Whoa nellie! Liam?! Is it morning already? LIAM Here, sir, watch this! LIAM grabs the remote and turns the TV on. As LIAM starts to do squats with the remote, BROCK watches as DIRK appears on the screen, this time with a picture of BROCK in the top right corner. DIRK (T.V.) Good morning everyone, I'm Dirk, and this is GNN, the Generic News Network. BROCK That's my picture! LIAM Shhh! DIRK (T.V.) In our top story today, local gym leader Brock apparently committed suicide the other day, as seen by approximately twenty witnesses who confirmed the story for GNN. Brock was both a notorious womanizer and somewhat of a buffoon. BROCK (T.H.) You know, Dirk went much easier on me than I thought he would. |
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Really enjoyed this chapter a lot. Haha at Brock trying to think up ways to get himself out of battle. And yay fro the return of Merv! Poor him not able to make it to the bathroom in time and also the possibility of him getting a divorce from his wife! D: I quite like Hal and Dallas there, but only because it's refreshing to see two people not falling for Brock's schemes, haha. Quite extreme for Dallas to want to fight Pokemon on his own. I assumed he had wrestled Ursaring a lot, lately? XD; Again, funny work here. Not much going on plot wise, but it's still funny nonetheless. Looking forward to the next chapter! |
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You're very welcome, by the way. When it comes to OOC-ness, that's debatable. Some people will say that there is characterization; you just have to look for it. (For example, Surge is somewhat paranoid. I mean, not only did he plant a bush to block trainers from getting anywhere near his gym, he also rigged the doors to get to him with a lock that can only be unlocked if trainers choose the exact two trash cans the switches are hidden in. Screw you too, Surge.) Buuuuuut this is an age-old argument full of YMMV, so... yeah. Quote:
ANYWAY, just so I can get in today's reviewing quota because I enjoyed the first few chapters thoroughly, I thought it'd be a good idea to sit down and check out the fourth episode. So here we go! The "I'm his brother and he died" bit may be the most brilliant cover-up ever created. Just want to start off on that note. (Also, that I also had to laugh at Brock's grandma escapades. This somehow explains so much about him.) Part of me would also like to someday see Brock as a gay barkeep. You know, I was actually wondering how a battle would be handled. I mean, even though the world seems to be populated with idiots (or somehow, Brock is able to skirt by without actually having to battle), there's a few intelligent characters here and there (most of whom seem to be related to Gladys somehow, hilariously enough). So, of course, I figured it was bound to happen either way. I just didn't know how it'd be rendered, given this script style and Brock's (lack of) battling prowess. Honestly, though, I wasn't disappointed. The fact that Hal wiped the floor with Brock fit in so nicely, and even with details being as sparse as you can get them to allow for actor interpretation, I could visualize Bulbasaur Vine Whipping the crap out of Brock's Pokémon perfectly. And, of course, Brock's attempts to get Hal to surrender (with those lulzy tidbits of "Pokémon knowledge") were exactly what I would have expected from your version of his character. I also thoroughly enjoyed the lampshading Brock did in the scene right after where he says that most people in the world are idiots. Lampshading, from what I've seen of people trying too hard to cram in references to TVTropes in humor fic, is a difficult thing to pull off in fanfiction, so it was awesome to see it done right. Mmm, Marv. All of the new characters, really. I'm thoroughly enjoying how you're very careful with each character. You don't really give them too much depth (because this is an episodic comedy, so this isn't actually a bad thing), but each of them have their own quirks to make them entertaining. Dallas's analogies, Artie's over-the-top intellectual side, all of them make watching them interact a treat, just to see how they all end up playing up each other's actual stupidity, if that makes sense. (...Although, really? Brock? Opening his eyes? Wat.) Also, Dallas is a badass. I sort of want to see fic of someone fighting Pokémon with just his fists. Or just more Dallas. He's just a stroke of sheer awesome there. And that last line was just the perfect way of wrapping this up. In all, I have to say this chapter had everything that drew me into this series in the first place. It was actually funny with a plot that made me want to see what kind of mess Brock got into next and new characters who brought something new and hilarious to the table. I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens next, considering you do maintain threads of continuity and considering the fact that Brock just faked his own death. That can only mean Pewter City's going to start trying to figure out what to do with the gym -- or that someone's going to try seeing what's up. Either way, I sense shenanigans on the horizon, so I'll be looking forward to the next chapter. |
Okay, there is multiquote, but I don't feel like using the quote function anyway! XP
Bay, to Brock, a line of twenty people waiting for a gym battle is his own personal hell. :P And Merv is great. He's one of my favorite recurring characters, along with Dallas. Jax, I despise TV Tropes. I think it's the most pointless website ever and it really has no reason to exist in the first place. I really just don't get the point of it. @[email protected] Writing the battle was... interesting. I knew it was something I would have to do eventually, and I think I handled it well by Brock focusing more on getting Hal to surrender than on the actual battle. :P And you will get to see Dallas fight, soon-ish. And it will be great. :) And as for Brock's "death", that is resolved at the beginning of the next chapter, which is coming up right after this! :D |
Episode 5: Ribbon Cutting INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK has just seen his obituary on the TV. LIAM finishes his squats with the remote and puts it down. LIAM See, sir? Everyone thinks you're dead now! No one will be coming around here for a battle anymore! BROCK That's good... oh ****. LIAM What? BROCK We have that ribbon cutting at the Pewter City Museum to go to. BROCK (TALKING HEAD) The Pewter City Museum is holding a big gala event for some exhibit that's opening up there, and they asked me to cut the ribbon for it. I'm guessing the exhibit centers around that cool rock I found while spelunking. LIAM We can just skip it, sir. Do you really want to risk having more challengers show up at the gym. BROCK But there's a free meal at the gala... LIAM (T.H.) Brock never passes up a free meal. There's no point in trying to change his mind now. LIAM I guess we're going then. BROCK Hell yeah! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The next day, LIAM is standing around the gym, wearing dress clothes, when BROCK walks out of his office, wearing a tuxedo. LIAM Looking sharp, sir! BROCK I don't need you to tell me that. That's what mirrors are for! BROCK (T.H.) As a gym leader, I'm often invited to a lot of gala events or fancy parties. Then the hosts ask me about any fun battling stories I may have. For some reason, I never get any more invites after that. BROCK Now then, did you do that research I asked you to? LIAM Yes, sir! The main course for the evening will be filet mignon! BROCK Excellent. And the women? LIAM The museum curator apparently has quite a beautiful daughter, sir. BROCK We'll have to see for ourselves first. Very well, let's get going. INT. PEWTER CITY MUSEUM LOBBY BROCK and LIAM enter the museum. Various people in fancy dress and milling around, talking to each other. BROCK Ah, museum galas! The very crux of high society! LIAM Are there any kids here? BROCK Quiet, you! LIAM (T.H.) Whenever Brock and I go to these fancy parties, there are never any kids. It gets boring for me. One time, I thought I saw a kid, but it was really a midget, and I got stuck there listening to him talk about stocks for an hour. The museum curator, an older bespectacled gentleman named MAGNUS, spots BROCK and seems shocked for a moment, but then walks over to greet him. MAGNUS Bless my stars! Hello, Brock! I'm simply amazed to see you! We all thought you weren't coming because you were dead! BROCK Hi, Magnus. It turns out I'm alive! I guess you just can't trust the news media. MAGNUS Actually, there are some members of the news media covering the ribbon cutting here tonight. I guess if they aren't trustworthy, I should tell museum security to keep a close eye on them. BROCK You should. The news media is the worst! MAGNUS Anyway, I'd just like to thank you again for your generous donation. It turns out that rock was a very rare Luminescent Opaque Sedimentary Coquina! BROCK That's... wait, what? MAGNUS Oh, don't be so humble! Something like that would have sold for millions on the rock market, but it was so nice of you to donate it to us instead! BROCK Yes, it was very nice. BROCK (T.H.) That's the last time I ever let Roark goad me into doing something charitable! MAGNUS Who's this kid with you, by the way? LIAM I'm Liam! I'm Brock's gym assistant! MAGNUS You know, Liam, I have a daughter right around your age! Let me find her. She'd absolutely love to have someone to talk to, as there are usually never any kids at these types of events! MAGNUS walks off to find his daughter. BROCK The curator's daughter is YOUR age, Liam?! LIAM I didn't know! I just heard she was attractive! BROCK From who, your friends during recess?! LIAM (T.H.) That's exactly who I heard it from. LIAM Definitely not, sir. BROCK Oh well, I guess I'll have to try and find someone else here, then. MAGNUS returns with his curly, blond-haired daughter, MADELINE. MAGNUS MADELINE grabs LIAM by the hand, and they run off.Liam, this is my daughter, Madeline. MADELINE Nice to meet you, Liam! LIAM Uh... hi! Hi Madeline! LIAM (T.H.) I don't have a scale like Brock... but Madeline is certainly a ten out of ten! MAGNUS Why don't you two go run along and have some fun now? MADELINE Sure, daddy! BROCK So, when will the ribbon cutting be happening? MAGNUS That will be momentarily after dinner. BROCK Okay. I want to be prepared. I'm pretty excited to cut the ribbon so everyone can see my big lumiopac rock thing. MAGNUS I beg your pardon? BROCK I'm cutting the ribbon for the exhibit about that rare rock I donated, right? MAGNUS Oh, dear me. I suppose we had a failure to communicate here. You aren't cutting the ribbon for an exhibit on that rock. You're cutting the ribbon for our new, one of a kind exhibit! It's a fossil Pokémon petting zoo! I figured you're a big fan of fossil Pokémon, so you'd love to cut the ribbon! BROCK Oh... BROCK (T.H.) I thought I was being honored here tonight, but I guess not! What does a man have to do to get some recognition?! BROCK walks around the lobby, when he bumps into ARTIE. ARTIE MAGNUS walks up to a podium with a microphone and makes an announcement.Egad! A specter! BROCK What? ARTIE I saw you pass on with my own eyes! You were only recently declared deceased. And yet here you are, standing before us. BROCK Oh yeah, I just faked my death, that's all. Anyway, why are you here? Aren't you just a Pokémon trainer? ARTIE I'm not only a trainer, but quite a gourmand as well! I attend spectacular galas such as this one quite often in order to enjoy some exquisite dishes. BROCK I think Liam mentioned you sometime, actually... don't you start talking like a brute when you haven't ate anything for a while? How come you're so well spoken now? ARTIE Ah, you see, I was sure to consume two meals prior to this engagement. MAGNUS Everyone, it is time to head over to the dining room. Please, find your seats and enjoy the meal. ARTIE Oh, sorry, but you must excuse me now. Have a pleasant evening. ARTIE runs off remarkably fast for someone of his size into the dining room. BROCK Wow... INT. PEWTER CITY MUSEUM DINING ROOM BROCK walks into the dining room and finds his seat. LIAM enters and finds his seat next to him. LIAM How's your evening going, sir? BROCK Ugh... it's terrible! It turns out the ribbon cutting isn't for my rock at all! And instead of talking to a hot girl, I talked to some fat guy instead! LIAM Well my night is going quite well. Madeline is charming. BROCK Quite honestly, I just want to leave after I get my free meal. Screw the ribbon cutting. GLADYS (OFF CAMERA) Leaving before doing what you came here to do? I smell a scoop! GLADYS takes her seat next to BROCK. GLADYS Hmph... I can't believe the curator sat me next to you for dinner. But it sounds like I found a goldmine of a story already! You're going to dine and ditch? BROCK Oh... oh no! Of course not! I will absolutely be cutting the ribbon tonight! GLADYS Hmph... if only I recorded what I heard you say earlier. And why are you still being taped?! And, since I'm just full of questions tonight, why aren't you dead? BROCK Oh, I guess you saw that on TV the other day. Well, it turns out all twenty of the witnesses that allegedly saw me die were mistaken. GLADYS All twenty were wrong?! What are the chances of that?! This wasn't all because of shenanigans on your part, was it? BROCK Um... no! GLADYS Hm... if you say so. BROCK So how's that article about me coming along? BROCK (T.H.) I know that she's never going to write that article because Liam erased the tape, but still, by asking about it, I can cast suspicion somewhere else! GLADYS Unfortunately, the article isn't happening. I had thought I recorded the interview, but when I checked the tape, it was blank. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you? BROCK No, of course not! I was looking forward to reading an article about me! GLADYS Well anyway, I wanted to publish the article even though I didn't have a recording, because your interview was so... memorable. BUT! This is what really pisses me off! Apparently some pipsqueak TV reporter named Regis visited my editor and accused me of unsavory journalism! And NOW if I want to write ANY article I have to prove to my editor that I have the sources to back it up! What kind of name is Regis in the first place?! If I ever find that petulant little ****, he's going to get a piece of my mind! LIAM Er... LIAM (T.H.) Good thing my name is Liam! BROCK Sounds like a tough job. Oh well. A WAITER comes to the table and serves everyone salad. LIAM picks the salad up and begins doing squats with it. BROCK What the hell are you doing, Liam? LIAM For every meal, I do an amount of squats proportional to the number of calories in that meal. Luckily, this is only a salad, so I don't have to do a lot of squats. But don't worry about remembering any of this, it's all going to be in my exercise video! LIAM puts the salad back on the table and starts eating it. GLADYS Still talking about exercise? My friend Joyce told me you two were obsessed with exercise not too long ago, but I thought it would just be a phase, like disco or caring about the environment. BROCK Oh, I don't care about exercising anymore. It's just the kid now. LIAM Exercise is very important! Do you think Madeline would like me if I was out of shape? GLADYS This Madeline girl must be pretty shallow... The WAITER returns to clean up all the salad bowls and then serves the main course. LIAM begins doing squats with the filet mignon as BROCK and GLADYS watch. GLADYS LIAM finishes the squats and joins in the meal with both BROCK and GLADYS.Oh... he was serious about all that squatting nonsense? BROCK Yup! LIAM I got to stay fit! BROCK Well, whatever, I'm digging in. It's the main reason I came here in the first place! GLADYS Of course... LIAM Mmm... this is pretty good, sir! How would you rank this? BROCK Well, it's better than the seafood spread we had for the opening of that new library at Pewter City High School, but I don't think it can compare to the veal we had at the premiere of that movie that was filmed here. BROCK (T.H.) I keep track of every fancy meal fed to me so I know who serves good stuff and who serves crap. GLADYS I was at both of those. I don't know what you're talking about, but that seafood spread was delicious! BROCK I'm a Rock type trainer! I detest anything involving the water! GLADYS (T.H.) Hmph... even if he liked that seafood spread, he would never admit it due to some misguided Rock type gym leader principles... what a fool! MAGNUS approaches the table. MAGNUS Ah, Brock, I see you've met Gladys. She's a fine reporter. She's written a lot of stories about the museum. Maybe you should ask her to write a story about the gym sometime! GLADYS Ha! MAGNUS (T.H.) Why did she laugh? What did I say that was funny? I better write it down so I can use that joke in the future! MAGNUS Anyway, Brock and Gladys, would you mind coming with me for a bit? There's someone I'd like you to meet. BROCK Fine, but since I haven't finished my food yet, I'm bringing it with me. GLADYS I'll go too... but I'm not bringing my food. LIAM I guess I'll just go and find Madeline then. LIAM walks away as MAGNUS guides BROCK and GLADYS into the lounge. INT. PEWTER CITY MUSEUM LOUNGE MAGNUS leads BROCK and GLADYS into a room with a few comfortable looking couches and chairs and a wine cooler. A man dressed in a lab coat, WINSTON, is sitting on a chair. BROCK fumbles around with his food for a bit until he just places it on a couch. MAGNUS Brock, Gladys, I'd like you both to meet Winston. WINSTON How do you do? BROCK and GLADYS both go to shake hands with WINSTON. BROCK Nice to meet you. GLADYS Same. MAGNUS Winston here has done some impressive work. Why don't you tell them? As WINSTON talks, MAGNUS shuffles around through the wine cooler. WINSTON Ah, yes. I was instrumental to the success of the fossil Pokémon petting zoo project... BROCK Ah, so you're the guy who stole my thunder! WINSTON What are you talking about? BROCK If it wasn't for your stupid fossil exhibit, this gala would be for my rock! GLADYS (T.H.) Quite honestly, Brock is basically a living train wreck. It's embarrassing watching him act like this. WINSTON Well, I was only the team leader. There were lots of other people who helped on the fossil project too. BROCK (T.H.) Winston is a gigantic nerd. I can't believe I have to cut the ribbon for his geeky exhibit instead of my awesome rock! MAGNUS returns with a bottle of wine and some wineglasses. MAGNUS Well, I hope you're all getting along swimmingly! Now I'd like you all to try this superb wine I imported from Hoenn! It's Chateau de Sootopolis circa 1952! MAGNUS pours a glass for GLADYS and WINSTON, but before he pours another one, BROCK interrupts him. BROCK Actually, do you have any beer? I could really go for a beer right now? MAGNUS This is some of the greatest wine money can buy! BROCK Yeah, but I don't really like drinking at parties unless it's beer. And it better be name brand too, I don't like drinking the local crap. You can never know how they make it. GLADYS Yes you can, if you visit the brewery. MAGNUS Well that's quite alright then, Brock. I'll just get you some beer from... somewhere. MAGNUS is about to leave, but GLADYS stops him. GLADYS Do you think you could leave the wine bottle here? I think I'm going to be drinking a lot of this tonight. MAGNUS notices that her wineglass is already empty. MAGNUS Wow! That was fast. Sure, I'll leave it here. MAGNUS hands the bottle to GLADYS, who immediately pours herself another glass. MAGNUS then leaves to find beer for BROCK. GLADYS (T.H.) I'm hoping if I drink enough wine I can just forget everything about Brock tonight. WINSTON Anyway, I haven't even begun talking about all the work we had to do in order to get the fossil Pokémon petting zoo open! First, we had a conundrum with the energy source for our regeneration machine, and we tried both differential equations and quadratic equations to solve the problem, but it turned out we simply needed to apply a conductivity principle to the machine, and after testing various false hypotheses we finally got the machine up and running. BROCK You don't say? GLADYS takes a big sip from her wineglass. GLADYS Winston, it was nice of you to explain all of that, but if I write any of that down, the readers of the Pewter City Gazette will have no idea what the hell any of that is. So, as a reporter, let me ask you: what's your favorite food? WINSTON I like spaghetti! But... wait! I like fried chicken too! Er... this is tough. Spaghetti or chicken? GLADYS I guess I'm not getting an interview out of this guy. GLADYS finishes all of the wine in her glass, puts the glass down, and starts drinking right from the bottle. MAGNUS returns with a beer for BROCK. MAGNUS Here you are, Brock: an ice cold beer! BROCK Oh, that may be a problem. I like my beer chilled, not cold. GLADYS Just take it! BROCK takes the beer from MAGNUS. BROCK Thank you anyway, I guess. MAGNUS Shall we get this ribbon cutting started now? The evening has been building up towards this! BROCK Yeah, let's get it over with. BROCK, GLADYS, MAGNUS, and WINSTON all leave the lounge, GLADYS still carrying the wine bottle. INT. PEWTER CITY MUSEUM EXHIBIT AREA BROCK, MAGNUS, and WINSTON are standing in front of a fenced in area with a ribbon wrapped around it. Inside the fence are various fossil Pokémon, including KABUTO, a brown, dome shaped one. BROCK looks around and spots the stone he donated. A crowd has gathered around to watch the ribbon cutting, including GLADYS with the wine bottle, and MADELINE and LIAM together. MAGNUS Now it's time for the main event. We'll cut the ribbon and officially open our one of a kind fossil Pokémon petting zoo, created by our one and only Winston! WINSTON Hello, it's nice to be here, but I'd like to talk to you about some of the science behind the- WINSTON is overwhelmed by all the clapping at his name and is unable to finish his sentence. MAGNUS Now then, Brock, our local gym leader, will do us the honor of cutting the ribbon on this wonderful exhibit! MAGNUS hands BROCK a gigantic pair of scissors. BROCK Thank you. But before I begin, I'd just like to say that the petting zoo isn't the only new exhibit here. Recently I donated a very rare rock that I found while spelunking Mt. Moon, and you can actually see it on display right over there! BROCK points to the rock, though most people are bewildered, and no one applauds him except for an obviously drunk GLADYS. GLADYS Yay! GLADYS drops the now empty wine bottle, drawing attention to herself and gathering a few stares. MAGNUS Okay. This has all been very interesting, but can you please cut the ribbon now? BROCK Fine. BROCK cuts the ribbon and the crowd begins to applaud. MAGNUS Now then, as a special treat for her, I'd like my daughter, Madeline, to come up and be the first person to experience the Pokémon petting zoo! The crowd turns around to face MADELINE and LIAM. MADELINE Oh? Me? I think Liam wants to do it instead! LIAM Sure! I'll do it! MADELINE (T.H.) Liam? I had no interest in him. I'm just deathly afraid of fossil Pokémon, and I didn't want my dad embarrassing me in public like that, so I just turned on the charm for Liam so that he'd be willing to go up there instead. LIAM walks up to the petting zoo and hops the fence. He approaches the KABUTO. LIAM Look at that! It's a nice, little Kabuto! Who's a good Kabuto? You are! LIAM goes to pet the KABUTO, but instead the KABUTO headbutts him. KABUTO Ka! Ka! LIAM goes flying into the fence, and then falls down to the ground. LIAM Ow! Why am I always the victim of Pokémon inflicted pain? MAGNUS That Kabuto is one angry bugger! Look, it seems like it's going in for another attack! Sure enough, KABUTO is moving towards LIAM. KABUTO Ka! Ka! KABUTO headbutts LIAM again, and this time LIAM crashes through the fence. LIAM Ow! I think I hurt my back or something! MAGNUS Oh well. Somebody call an ambulance, I guess. But anyway, that's all we have for tonight! Please feel free to enjoy all of our exhibits now! The crowd begins to mill around the museum, and no one actually does call and ambulance for LIAM. GLADYS approaches BROCK, who is staring at his rock, forlorn. GLADYS That was such a great speech you gave! BROCK You really think so? GLADYS Oh yeah, it was great, like... uh... there was that one part! GLADYS breaks out into a fit of giggles. GLADYS (T.H.) Am I drunk? Uh... no! If I was drunk, would I try flashing the camera? GLADYS tries flashing the camera, but it turns away. GLADYS Anyway... Brock... GLADYS places her arm around BROCK. GLADYS How about we... and we is me and you... but... uh... we go to my bedroom and... uh... go on my bed there? And we can do the... uh... sex. BROCK Yes! Absolutely! Let me just get my coat! BROCK turns around to walk to the coatroom, but sees LIAM, still on the ground. LIAM Ow! Is anyone actually going to help me? BROCK turns back to GLADYS. BROCK Actually, I'm sorry, but I have to take that kid to the hospital. GLADYS Oh... uh... that's fine... I'll just... uh... GLADYS slumps down onto the floor and begins to take a nap. BROCK walks over to LIAM. BROCK Come on, Liam. Let's go. BROCK picks LIAM up and they leave the museum. BROCK (T.H.) Did my night go exactly as I planned? No. I thought I was the one being honored, but that nerd Winston was instead. At the end of the night, though, Gladys, in her drunken stupor, wanted to have sex with me, the cool rock guy, and not Winston, the lame fossil Pokémon petting zoo that nearly kills people guy, and in the end, I think that says it all. INT. PEWTER CITY HOSPITAL ROOM The next day, LIAM wakes up from a long sleep to find BROCK waiting at a chair. LIAM Brock! You're still here! How long was I out? BROCK I'd say around a good fourteen hours. That Kabuto really knocked a lot out of you. The doctors said nothing was really hurt except your pride, though. LIAM And you waited here this whole time with me? BROCK Of course! After all, what better excuse to not be at the gym than my assistant being stuck at the hospital! LIAM Did Madeline visit? BROCK Who? LIAM Oh... I guess not. LIAM (T.H.) So I suppose the chemistry I had with Madeline was just a one night only thing. It's a shame, too, because I really wanted to date a girl named Madeline. It's a name that really stands out, unlike something boring such as Jane or Sally. BROCK Well, now that you're up, I've got some work for you to do! The Rock type convention is coming up soon and I'm going to need everything packed for my departure. Get going. LIAM Yes, sir! LIAM hops out of bed and runs out. BROCK follows. BROCK (T.H.) I don't need anything packed right away. I just wanted to get out of the before the doctors got back so that we didn't have to pay a hospital bill! |
Still pretty darn amusing, imo. =) I liked the two plots here and how they carried off others/each other as well, with the museum one playing off Brock thinking it was all about his findings, and also continuing the 'Brock is dead' which was amusing to see (ignoring that I half-expected it to anyway). The plot does appear to be moving nicely and I look forward to seeing the further developments. The battle was also amusing (if understandably one-sided, heh), and the excuses and other side characters just as amusing. Dallas is one in particular - I liked the comments in regards to indoor plumbing given he was Orre (making it a potentially understandable comment), and him wanting to fight the Pokemon with his fists was also a rather amusing concept (and one I would have liked to have seen truth be told. XD).
Gladys getting too drunk and then wanting to hit it off with Brock was an unexpected turn, I'll admit, although she did not strike me to be the character to end up doing such a thing - but I guess she was very much under the influence there. XD Quote:
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And so concludes my uneventful and short review. =p |
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Another funny chapter here. Aw, I feel sorry for Liam, both for his "date" not interested in him and the Kabuto incident. XD And indeed, Winston is such a nerd. :P Nice follow up from the ending last chapter, although I feel more people in the party be more shocked to see Brock. Probably this is just me, though. I too am surprised Gladys was hitting on Brock, but I guess that what happens when you drink too much wine, haha. YOU MISSED YOUR CHANCE AT GETTING LAID, BROCK! D: Sorry for short review. This episode is short, but still a lot of fun to read. :D Looking forward to next chapter! |
First off, bobandbill. The Brock is dead plot is something I kind of wrote without thinking, so I realized at the beginning of the next episode "Oh ****, I need to resolve this." I think it turned out pretty well. Brock would ruin his plan over some free food, right? :P
Gladys getting drunk sure is interesting, but I guess alcohol makes people do things that they'll end up regretting. Bay, this chapter was as long as all the others. :P And you seem pretty shocked at Brock missing his chance at getting laid. In the end though, Brock had to choose between Gladys and Liam, and I think it's nice that Brock and Liam have such a strong friendship, even though it has its bumps a lot of a time. It's one of those things that develops when you're basically with the other person for most of your time. |
Episode 6: The Convention INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK and LIAM are in the gym, arguing. BROCK has two suitcases next to him. LIAM Why can't I go with you, sir? BROCK I'm sorry, but the convention really cheaped out this year! I have to share a room with someone? Do you know how gross that is? BROCK (TALKING HEAD) The time has come for the annual Rock type Pokémon convention. Every year I attend, and every year it gets worse and worse. Two years ago they had an open bar, but last year they had an open bar that totally sucked. It was terrible. I still had like five drinks there though. LIAM Do you know what you're going to say, sir? BROCK I prepared some remarks. BROCK (T.H.) Every year I go to the convention and I do a little program about being a Rock type gym leader. It's not the most attended program, but... that's it. LIAM I want to hear what you wrote, sir! BROCK Okay, let's see... BROCK takes out a sheet of paper from his pocket and starts reading from it. BROCK "Hello everyone. My name is Brock. I'm a Rock type trainer and the gym leader of Pewter City. Today I will talk to you about..." and that's all I got so far. LIAM That's a brilliant speech, sir! BROCK I know. I had a little trouble trying to figure out if I should say I'm a Rock type trainer first or if I'm a gym leader first, but I think I made the right choice. Anyway, Liam, because you aren't going to the convention, this will be the first time you'll be running the gym by yourself. LIAM Yes, sir! BROCK Remember, under no circumstances are you to battle with anyone, and definitely under no circumstances are you to hand out a Boulder Badge to anyone. LIAM I don't think we even have any Boulder Badges left, sir. BROCK Good, that's a great excuse to use if any trainers come by. LIAM (T.H.) Am I nervous about being in charge of the gym for these two days? A little. Brock can run the gym, but that's because he's made avoiding gym battles into an art. He's like Picasso, and I'm like some other guy that's not a painter. BROCK Well, goodbye. I'll see you tomorrow once I'm back. LIAM Have a good trip, sir! BROCK gathers his suitcases and walks out of the gym. INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK walks into the hotel with his suitcases. The CLERK at the front desk greets him. CLERK Good afternoon, sir! Are you here for the convention? BROCK Yes, I'm Brock. The convention coordinator should have left a room key for me. CLERK Ah, of course. You're in room 5015. The other guest already checked in. The CLERK hands BROCK the room key. BROCK Great. INT. CELADON HOTEL ROOM BROCK walks into the room to find ROARK already on one of the beds, watching TV. BROCK ****. ROARK Brock? We're rooming together for the convention! This is great! ROARK jumps off the bed and gives BROCK a big pat on the back. BROCK Hi Roark. BROCK (T.H.) I can't believe those bastards put me in the same room as this guy! ROARK This Celadon Hotel is great! Isn't it wonderful that the convention coordinator was able to get us free rooms?! This hotel has room service and a swimming pool! And you have to pay for the internet! It's just like home! BROCK Last year all the V.I.P.s had their own rooms. ROARK You can't live in the past, Brock. Just think about how great of a time we'll have this year! ROARK (T.H.) This is my first time attending a Rock type Pokémon convention as a V.I.P. Honestly, I'm just happy to be here, especially with my good friend Brock! BROCK (T.H.) Really? He called me a "good friend"? What a tool! ROARK So anyway, where do you want to get lunch? There are like five different places nearby the hotel that sound pretty good! I want to save the steakhouse for dinner, but we can go to the pizzeria for lunch! BROCK Hm... we could do that, OR we can go to different places to eat, because we won't be able to hit all five places if we don't go separately. ROARK Don't worry about that! We can stay late tomorrow for dinner, and that way we can hit all five places! It'll be fun! BROCK Oh, I have to leave early. The kid is in charge and I don't want to stress him out. ROARK I wouldn't worry about him! I put Heather in charge of my gym, and I'm sure she'll do a splendid job! Anyway, I saw in the papers that you donated a rare stone to the Pewter City Museum! That's great news! I'm always saying people need to improve the quality of their local museums! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is sitting in the gym when he hears a knock on the door. LIAM A challenger?! Oh dear... LIAM runs to the door and opens it. A TRAINER is standing outside. TRAINER Brock? I challenge you to a gym... wait a minute. Who the hell are you? LIAM I'm Liam. TRAINER Liam? What kind of sissy name is that? LIAM What do you mean? TRAINER I don't want to battle some lamer named Liam! I'm out of here! The TRAINER closes the door. LIAM (T.H.) Is Liam really a sissy name? I may need to reinvent myself! INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK and ROARK get off the elevator and walk into the lobby. ROARK So anyway, I really like pepperoni on my pizza, but I'm partial to plain pizza too! I'm not a big fan of extra cheese, though. BROCK Oh really? The convention coordinator, ALICE, spots BROCK and ROARK and walks up to them. ALICE Brock! Roark! I'm glad to see you got here safe and sound! ALICE (T.H.) I'm Alice. I'm the convention coordinator, so I'm basically in charge of planning all of this. I'm so glad you're going to be filming some of this convention! The best publicity is free publicity! ROARK Hi Alice! It's a delight to be here! You look great today! ALICE Aw, thank you! So where are you two pals going? BROCK Lunch. ALICE Enjoy! There's this great pizza place nearby that you should check out! ROARK We were actually on our way there! Great minds think alike! ALICE Oh, there's some important convention info that I should tell you guys. Brock, I know you had a program scheduled for tomorrow, but unfortunately we had a record low number of people buy tickets for it, so we decided to bump up Roark's program so that you two will be running the program together. That'll be fun, right? ROARK Running a program with Brock?! That's great! BROCK (T.H.) Shoot me now. INT. PIZZERIA BROCK and ROARK walk into the pizzeria. ROARK spots ROXANNE, another Rock type gym leader, already at a table, eating. ROARK Roxanne? Roxanne! You're here too? This is great! All of us Rock type gym leaders are together! ROXANNE Oh, hi Roark! And hi Brock! BROCK Hi Roxanne! BROCK (T.H.) Roxanne and I have quite a story. Two years ago, at this very convention, Roxanne got drunk, and then we had sex. I don't get why girls only seem to be attracted to me when they're drunk. ROXANNE (T.H.) Brock and I? Nah, there's been nothing between us... wait... oh! Never mind! We had sex two years ago. I forgot about that! So yeah, I guess there was something between us. Wow, I can't believe I forgot that. I must have been pretty hammered. ROARK Let's all eat pizza together! Eating with friends is fun! ROXANNE Sure! We can all eat together! ROARK Brock, lunch is on me! I'll be right back! ROARK walks to the counter to make an order while BROCK talks to ROXANNE. BROCK So how have you been? You missed the convention last year. ROXANNE My teaching job conflicted with the convention. Damn kids. But anyway, how have you been, Brock? BROCK Pretty good. I got to cut the ribbon on some exhibit at the Pewter City Museum. ROXANNE How about that kid? What was his name? Lee? BROCK Liam. He's in charge of the gym while I'm gone. I hope he does a good job. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is pacing around the gym when there is a knock on the door. LIAM Okay. No nonsense this time! I'm not going to be a sissy this time! LIAM walks over to the door and opens it to find MERV waiting. MERV Hey, I heard you didn't die, so now I need to beat you in a gym battle so that my trophy wife will let me move in again! Wait a minute, who are you? LIAM I'm Regis! The real question is: who the hell are you? MERV I'm... I'm Merv. Haven't I met you before? LIAM It depends. Have you ever met anyone named ****ing Regis before? I don't think so! MERV That's true! You're really intimidating me! I'm too scared to battle you! I guess it's another night at the motel for me. MERV walks away and LIAM shuts the gym door. LIAM Nobody ****s around with Regis! INT. PIZZERIA ROXANNE I'm sure he won't let you down. ROARK returns with two plates of pizza. ROARK I wanted to be adventurous, so I ordered anchovies on our pizza! This should be fun! ROARK (T.H.) I love being adventurous! Sometimes, I walk through urban housing districts without even wearing a bulletproof vest! BROCK Roark, why the hell would anyone ever want anchovies on their pizza? ROXANNE laughs. ROXANNE He's right you know, Roark. Anchovies? Seriously? ROARK What? I thought it would be a good idea! ROXANNE laughs again. ROXANNE Anchovies are never a good idea! BROCK Well, I'm going to take them off. BROCK takes his plate of pizza and takes all the anchovies off. ROARK takes a bite into his pizza, and he tries to cover his disgust with the taste. ROXANNE Roark, you don't have to pretend you like it. ROARK It was still a fun experiment though! ROARK (T.H.) I am of the opinion that you can't knock something until you try it! It's why I made out with someone in a bathroom once. BROCK takes all the anchovies and throws them in the garbage. BROCK No it wasn't. INT. CELADON HOTEL CONVENTION HALL BROCK, ROARK, and ROXANNE have returned to the hotel and are now checking out the convention. BROCK What should we check out next? BROCK (T.H.) The Rock type convention has a lot of programs, mainly about rocks. Really, they're all about rocks. Who knew it was even possible to plan two whole days about rocks? ROARK I want to go to that program about rock polishing! ROXANNE Roark, we all know how to polish rocks. That would be boring. BROCK It's great to have someone else here that can tell him that everything he does is wrong. ROXANNE laughs. ROXANNE Oh, he's just a goofy kid. Nothing to worry about. BROCK So, Roxanne, are you still single? ROXANNE Haha, Brock! Did you really just ask that? BROCK Uh... yes. ROXANNE laughs some more. ROXANNE Well, yes, I am single, but I'm not looking for anything right now. BROCK Oh... ROXANNE (T.H.) Is Brock a pervert? I don't think so. His heart is in the right place, but... certain... other parts may not be. ROARK Well I'm looking for a good program for us to go to! Can I have some help here, guys? ROXANNE Let's just skip a program for now. We're all friends, right? BROCK That's debatable. ROXANNE Regardless, we can all just hang out. It'll be more fun than attending a program on how to polish your rocks. ROARK Hey! Don't badmouth rock polishing! If it wasn't for it, how else would you be able to polish your rocks?! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM has raided the office refrigerator and is drinking a diet soda when there is a knock on the door again. LIAM Who does this punk think he is? Or she. LIAM opens the door to find DALLAS waiting. DALLAS Now ya' listen' here, I swore you'd rue the day and I ain't gonna let ya' not rue the day! LIAM Um... excuse me?! DALLAS Now wait just a darn minute! Ya' ain't Brock! Who are ya'? LIAM I'm Regis. I'm a total bad ***. You see this diet soda I'm drinking? LIAM lifts the diet soda up. LIAM I hate diet soda! But I'm drinking it anyway because there's no other soda left in the fridge. DALLAS Well I don't care about ya' and that here diet soda! I wanna battle Brock! I reckon I'd be better off lookin' somewhere else! DALLAS leaves and LIAM closes the door. LIAM Another victory for Regis! LIAM takes a sip of diet soda. INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK, ROARK, and ROXANNE are chatting in the lobby when ALICE approaches them. ALICE Hey everyone! Aw, it's so sweet to see that all of you Rock type gym leaders are all friends. BROCK Eh, I'd consider myself more of an acquaintance with Roark, and it pains me to say that too. ALICE It doesn't matter. I just wanted to tell you guys that, like always, we'll have an open bar at the hotel tonight. ROXANNE That sounds great! I love free booze! BROCK (T.H.) Two years ago, when Roxanne and I were at the open bar, we ended up having sex at the end of the night. Am I hoping for an encore of that night? Yes. Yes I am. ROARK I don't know about that. We have a program to run tomorrow, right Brock? BROCK Trust me, no one is going to care if we show up to the program hung over. ROARK (T.H.) I'm not really a heavy drinker. If I start drinking, my judgment becomes cloudy, and I may start making some stupid decisions. BROCK (OFF CAMERA) Like putting anchovies on pizza? ROARK (T.H.) Shh... this is my interview! ROXANNE Oh, come on, Roark. When else are you going to get the opportunity to do something like this? ROARK At the convention next year. ROXANNE Oh, stop being such a stick in the mud! ROARK I don't want to be a stick! Sticks are branches, which are parts of trees, and trees are associated with Grass types, which Rock types have a weakness to! Being a stick would be terrible! BROCK Great. I guess he's going with us now. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM (T.H.) I think my first day running the gym went great. Regis had an amazing start, and he definitely has nowhere to go but up. Tomorrow will be an even better day for Regis. LIAM locks up the office door. LIAM (T.H.) Man, drinking that diet soda was terrible. Even for Regis. Never again. LIAM turns off the gym lights. LIAM (T.H.) Ooh, it's spooky in here without the lights on. I wonder how Brock sleeps at night... Regis would be able to handle it though. LIAM walks out of the gym and locks up the door. INT. CELADON HOTEL ROOM BROCK and ROARK are chatting in the hotel room. ROARK So is this open bar thing going to be like a party? BROCK If it's like a party, I'll be sticking to beer. ROARK (T.H.) I love parties. Whenever I'm invited to one, I'll never pass on it. I even went to my grandma's bridge party once. ROARK I don't want to stay up too late. It's important to get a good eight hours of sleep every night! BROCK Really, don't worry about it. There is a knock on the hotel room door. BROCK Come in! ROXANNE walks into the room. ROXANNE Okay, I just had to freshen up. BROCK You put makeup on? ROARK Roxanne, it looks wonderful. ROXANNE Why thank you! ROXANNE (T.H.) Roark can be entirely too complimentary sometimes. It's hard to tell if he's being sincere or not. It is kind of cute, though. BROCK Well, should we get going already? ROXANNE Let's! INT. CELADON HOTEL BAR BROCK, ROARK, and ROXANNE walk into the bar, and they are all greeted by ALICE. ALICE Awesome! You all came here! ROARK So what's been going on? ALICE All of the convention attendees have just been mingling. So far it's been a really nice time! ROARK I love meeting new people! I'm going to find someone to chat with right now! ROARK walks off. BROCK Mingling? Sounds close enough to a party to me! I'm getting a beer. BROCK walks off. ALICE So Roxanne, what do you think of those two? ROXANNE What do I think? ROXANNE (T.H.) Is Alice really trying to have girl talk with me? I see her maybe once a year. I don't want to deal with this! ALICE You know, who do you like more? Brock? Roark? Roark is younger, you know. ROXANNE I'm not sure how comfortable I am talking about this. They're both two real people with real feelings. ALICE Whatever you say... but personally, I'd go for Roark. ALICE walks off. ROXANNE spots ROARK talking to a girl, LISA. ROARK So I'm battling this guy, and he sends out a Zapdos! At first I'm just standing there in awe, wondering if I can even beat this guy, but then I said to myself, "Hold on a second, all of my Pokémon have attacks that are twice as effective on a Zapdos!" And I won! LISA Wow... that's so cool. ROXANNE That really is impressive, Roark. ROARK Oh, hi Roxanne! BROCK returns with two beers. BROCK Here, Roxanne, I got you a beer too. BROCK hands ROXANNE a beer. ROXANNE Oh, thanks so much, Brock! But what about Roark? BROCK Oh, don't worry about him. He doesn't like beer. ROARK (T.H.) That's not true. I enjoy light beer. ROARK I'll see if the bartender has anything else. ROARK walks off. BROCK So who's this girl? LISA My name's Lisa. ROXANNE I'm Roxanne! BROCK And I'm Brock, Pewter City Gym Leader and part time spelunker. LISA Oh... hey, do you think Roark is cool? He seems like such an awesome guy! BROCK Oh, him? I think he pulled the plug on his grandma or something like that. LISA Really? ROARK returns. ROARK The bartender made me this excellent drink called a martini! LISA How could you?! LISA storms away. ROARK Does she not like martinis? ROXANNE laughs. ROXANNE I wouldn't worry about it too much. Brock was just having a little bit of fun. BROCK For me, that was a lot of fun. ROXANNE (T.H.) Yeah, Roark is a really nice guy, but Brock can be really funny, both intentionally and unintentionally, sometimes. Wait, why am I telling you all of this? The night continues on, and BROCK, ROARK, and ROXANNE continue to drink. Eventually, ROXANNE hits her limit. ROXANNE Ugh, guys, I feel like I'm going to throw up now. I just need to run off to my room for a bit. ROXANNE runs off. ROARK Brock, it's been a very nice evening, but I think I'm going to call it a night. Are you going to stick around? BROCK Yeah, I'm going to wait for Roxanne to come back. BROCK (T.H.) I wish we could go to my room once Roxanne gets back, but Roark has to go to bed at like five P.M. ROARK Okay then! Enjoy the rest of the night! ROARK walks off. BROCK waits for quite some time, but ROXANNE fails to appear. Eventually ALICE approaches BROCK. ALICE Sorry, but the bar's closing now, Brock. I hope you had a good time! And good luck on your program with Roark in the morning! BROCK Thanks Alice. And I did have a good time! I was just hoping for something better. INT. CELADON HOTEL HALLWAY BROCK is walking to his room. BROCK (T.H.) Well, nothing happened with Roxanne tonight. It's just like the lottery; I tried and predictably lost, and my luck will still be bad next year anyway. BROCK gets to his hotel room and opens the door, and is shocked at the sight he sees: ROXANNE and ROARK in bed. BROCK What the hell? What the hell?! ROXANNE Oh my Arceus! This is so embarrassing! ROXANNE tries to pull some bedsheets over her. ROARK Brock! How was the rest of your night! BROCK (T.H.) Well... I certainly was NOT expecting that. INT. PEWTER CITY GAZETTE OFFICES GLADYS is in her office, twiddling with her pen. GLADYS (T.H.) Really? You came here to ask me how I felt about asking Brock to have sex with me? When I was drunk? You really want to throw salt in the wound? I'm not going to talk about it! It's not something I want to relive, and quite frankly, I don't get why you're still interviewing me anyway! GLADYS drops her pen. GLADYS (T.H.) Oh! Whoops! GLADYS gets down on the floor to pick up the pen under her desk, but makes an audible gasp and appears frustrated when she comes back up. GLADYS (T.H.) Oh, I'm sorry, it's just that I saw the most interesting thing on my desk down there! "Liam was here"? He couldn't even be bothered to spell "was" the right way! I'm starting to doubt I just forgot to record that interview with Brock. I guess I'll be visiting the gym tomorrow. |
Before I start this review, going to reply your reply to my review. XD
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And haha, I'm not shocked. I like being overdramatic in my reviews sometimes. :P But yeah, I can tell the two have a strong friendship and I love that. Woot for Brock helping Liam! :D Okay, with that out of the way, quick review time! Quote:
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Anyways, this is another fun chapter there. I love Liam's new persona there and also yay for Merv and Dallas! Too bad they didn't get to battle. :P Haha, again love Roark in this episode and also Roxanne is fun in it too. She's been laughing a whole lot, though. O.o Haha, knew the two will end up together in bed, but it's still a funny scene to read. Last part with Gladys...all I have to say is watch out, Liam! D: |
Bay, Liam's new persona sure is interesting. Maybe he should have used a different name, though. :O
And yes, there was a lot of build up to Roxanne sleeping with SOMEONE by the end of the night. Poor Brock; he's so unlucky with love! Will he ever find someone? |
Episode 7: The Fangirl INT. CELADON HOTEL ROOM BROCK is sitting on his bed. ROXANNE has gotten dressed, though ROARK has only bothered to put his boxers on. ROXANNE I really don't know how to explain this. BROCK I'm not sure if I want to hear it. ROARK I can explain it! Roxanne asked me if I wanted to have sex, and I never turn anyone down for anything, so I said, "Yes"! ROXANNE Roark... ROARK What? I think I did a pretty great job explaining the situation! ROXANNE Brock, I'm sorry. Obviously my judgment is a bit... um... cloudy or something? I drank too much. BROCK Maybe you should just get back to your room for the night. ROXANNE That's a good idea. I'll see you two in the morning. ROXANNE leaves the room. ROARK We sure had a lot of fun! BROCK Shut it, Roark. The next morning, BROCK and ROARK wake up and start preparing for the program they are hosting. ROARK Are you ready for this? I've never hosted a program before, never mind co-hosting a program! We should make a great team! BROCK Roark, do you even realize that you slept with the girl I wanted to sleep with last night? ROARK Oh, you like Roxanne? She sure is nice! BROCK (TALKING HEAD) Roark isn't very good at picking up hints. One time he visited the Pewter City Gym and he wouldn't leave. I showed him the door and told him it was in working order. He stayed for an hour after that. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM is in the bathroom as the phone rings. LIAM hears the phone and rushes to answer it. LIAM (OFF CAMERA) Crap! I didn't even get a chance to wipe! LIAM enters the office but is too late. The call goes to the message machine. GLADYS (VOICE ONLY) Brock, this is Gladys. I'm swinging by the gym later today. There's something we have to discuss about our interview. I'll see you soon. LIAM This sucks. Hopefully Regis will be able to scare her away from the gym. Anyway, I better finish up. LIAM exits the office to go back into the bathroom. INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK and ROARK meet ROXANNE in the lobby. ROARK Roxanne! Hi! Are you going to our program today? ROXANNE I may. Brock, can I have a word with you? BROCK Sure. BROCK and ROXANNE walk off into a corner of the lobby. ROXANNE Brock, I'm really sorry about last night. It was embarrassing for me. I only did what I did last night because I was drunk. BROCK (T.H.) In girl speak, that means she totally regrets not sleeping with me. BROCK I understand. Everybody makes mistakes. ROXANNE Thanks. I really regret it. ROXANNE (T.H.) I hope Brock understands that I'm just apologizing for when he walked in on us last night. I'm not sure if I'm really into him or not. BROCK and ROXANNE walk back over to ROARK. ROARK I hope you guys had a nice chat! Now where are we getting breakfast? I want to go to the Pancake Palace! BROCK Fine, we can go there. ROARK Yay! INT. PANCAKE PALACE BROCK, ROXANNE, and ROARK are sitting at a table. A WAITRESS walks over to serve the three their pancakes. The three begin to start eating. ROARK These pancakes are great! ROXANNE They're okay. Definitely not the best I've ever eaten, though. ROARK (T.H.) These pancakes ARE the best I've ever eaten, but that's only because I don't think I've ever eaten pancakes before. ROARK So anyway, what are we going to go over during our program, Brock? BROCK Well, I had some remarks prepared, but now that we're working together, I guess I'll scrap those and come up with something new. ROARK You don't have to do that! What did you have written down? I want to hear it! BROCK There's a problem though. I started my speech off with "Hello everyone. My name is Brock. I'm a Rock type trainer and the gym leader of Pewter City. Today I will talk to you about," and you see, the problem there is that I used the word "I", but since both of us are doing the program, I should have used "we". It's salvageable. Also, I definitely wrote a lot more than that. I just didn't feel like reading it all. ROARK I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do, so we can say some other stuff! BROCK Yes! That's perfect! BROCK (T.H.) I really dodged a bullet there. INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK, ROXANNE, and ROARK come back from breakfast and enter the lobby. ALICE is standing by a bespectacled girl with her brown hair in pigtails , ELIZABETH, and is relieved to see BROCK finally enter. ALICE Brock! Thank Arceus you're here! ELIZABETH Brock's here?! Yay! ELIZABETH starts jumping up and down, and then runs toward BROCK. ELIZABETH Brock! Brock! I'm your biggest fan! I'm Elizabeth! I think you're the best! You are the best gym leader! BROCK Um... ALICE walks over. ALICE Oh, I'm so sorry about this, Brock. This girl tracked me down this morning and demanded to meet you. I didn't know how to get rid of her, so I figured my only choice was to just let her meet you. ALICE (T.H.) Fans are the worst. They just walk up to you and start barking orders like they're the master of the universe instead of the master of their parents' basement! ELIZABETH I'm so excited to meet you, Brock! You are a gym leader! You are the gym leader of Pewter City! You use Rock types, which are strong against Fire types! BROCK Those are all... facts about me. ELIZABETH (T.H.) When I get excited, I just start rambling off! Like you're a cameraman! You're filming this interview! It's your job! ROARK Hi Elizabeth! I'm Roark! I'm also a Rock type gym leader! I'll be running the program with Brock later today. ELIZABETH Who's this guy? ALICE Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, Brock, but this girl is one of the only people who bought a ticket to your program. ELIZABETH I don't want anyone sharing the stage with Brock! I bought that ticket to the program with my money! It was an affordable ticket! BROCK You can watch me during the program, then. Don't we have to prepare now, Roark? BROCK (T.H.) I don't like rabid fans. They're like rabid Growlithes, except rabid fans don't bite... well, most of them. ROARK That's sounds like a great idea! We'll see you later, Roxanne! ROXANNE Good luck! I'll probably check in on your program later. BROCK and ROARK walk away, leaving ROXANNE, ELIZABETH, and ALICE. ELIZABETH Who are you, lady? ROXANNE I'm Roxanne. I'm the gym leader of Rustboro City, and I'm friends with Brock and Roark. ELIZABETH Are you Brock's girlfriend? You better not be Brock's girlfriend! I want to be Brock's girlfriend! ROXANNE Okay... INT. CELADON HOTEL CONVENTION STAGE BROCK and ROARK are sitting at a table up on a stage. No one else has entered the auditorium yet. BROCK Roark, I have a question. Did you have any idea that I like Roxanne? ROARK Oh, of course I did! What's not to like about her? BROCK Well, by "like", I guess I really meant "want to have sex with". ROARK Oh, I figured that too. I thought it wouldn't be that big of a deal because you want to have sex with basically every girl anyway! BROCK Are you serious? Yes, I do want to have sex with anyone that gets a seven or higher on my scale, but Roxanne is like a ten! You were out of line! ROARK (T.H.) I'm starting to think I did something wrong... INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA There is a knock on the door, and LIAM opens it to find GLADYS waiting for him. GLADYS walks right into the gym. GLADYS Liam, where's Brock? LIAM Who the hell is Liam?! GLADYS What are you even talking about? I'm not here to play games. I need to talk to Brock right now! LIAM My name is Regis! You got a problem with that or something, lady? GLADYS What I do have a problem with is how difficult it is to get a straight answer out of anyone at this gym! And who the hell is Regis?! Your name is Liam! LIAM I've never heard of this Liam, but he sounds like a real loser. I told you, my name's Regis! GLADYS Regis... dammit! It was you! You petulant little ****! LIAM is now visibly shaken. LIAM What are you talking about? GLADYS The day my tape of the Brock interview was erased, my editor told me some kid named Regis accused me of shady journalism! And then, just the other day, I find a message on the bottom of my desk. And you know what it said? Liam was here! Except "was" was spelled wrong! LIAM I... don't get where you're going with this. GLADYS Stop trying to deny this, Liam! You went to my editor, defamed my character, and then broke into my office and got rid of the tape to protect Brock! I bet he put you up to it, too! LIAM Um... I don't think any of that happened. GLADYS Really? You want to play this game?! Well, wherever the hell Brock is, you can tell him he can't hide forever, because I'm going to drag his *** into court! GLADYS storms out of the gym, slamming the door shut. LIAM INT. CELADON HOTEL CONVENTION STAGEUm... LIAM (T.H.) I don't think I'll tell Brock any of that. It's for the best, right? BROCK and ROARK are still sitting on stage, but now people are filling into the auditorium. ELIZABETH is one of the first people in, and she gets herself a front row seat. ELIZABETH Brock! I can't believe you're on stage! You are going to talk to us! You're probably going to talk about Rock type Pokémon! This is amazing! BROCK turns to ROARK. BROCK Can we get rid of her? She's pretty annoying? ROARK I don't see what the problem is. ROARK (T.H.) I absolutely love my fans! They're just so nice to me! Some of them even send me stuff, like locks of their hair. The best part about that is that I can donate the hair to make toupees or merkins for people that suffer from hair loss. The auditorium is now packed, so BROCK and ROARK decide to begin the program. ROARK Hello! It's so nice to see such a great turn out! I'm Roark... BROCK And I'm Brock. ELIZABETH I love you, Brock! ROARK And today we're going to talk to you about our experiences running Rock type gyms. BROCK But first, we thought it'd be fun to do a little Q and A, so anyone who has any questions can line up behind the microphone right there- BROCK points to a microphone in between columns of seats in the auditorium. BROCK -and you can ask us whatever you want. ELIZABETH runs up to be the first person at the microphone, and others follow. ELIZABETH Hi, I just want to say that you're my favorite, Brock! I love you! And I guess my question would be... um... will you marry me? BROCK Uh... no. Next question. ELIZABETH goes to her seat, somewhat disappointed, while a MAN takes the microphone. MAN Hello, I have a question for the guy in the hard hat. ROARK That would be me. MAN Yeah, why are you wearing a hard hat? It's not like you're doing any mining now. ROARK That is a great question. You see, I had sex last night, and it really messed up my hair. I didn't feel like putting a lot of effort into fixing it up this morning, so I just put my hard hat on. MAN That makes a lot of sense. Thank you. MAN (T.H.) That was a satisfactory answer. Hey, while you're recording me, I may as well tell you something fun. You know what else I call hard hats? Condoms. A WOMAN now takes the microphone. WOMAN I have a question for both of you. BROCK Go ahead. WOMAN What kind of mileage is good on a used car? I went to the dealership last week but I think the salesman was lying to me. BROCK I don't see how that's relevant at all. ROARK Oh, don't worry, I got this one! Usually you don't want to buy a used car that has more than 80,000 miles on it. WOMAN Ah, the salesman was lying to me. Figures. The WOMAN leaves, and a GIRL now takes the microphone. GIRL First off I just want to thank both of you for being here! It's so nice of you! ROARK Why thank you, little lady! BROCK You're welcome. GIRL Anyway... my question is... hm... I don't know what to ask! ROARK Don't get nervous! You can ask us whatever you'd like! GIRL Okay! What's your favorite color? BROCK Brown. ROARK Brown. GIRL Oh... The GIRL walks away and is replace by DALLAS. DALLAS I finally found ya' at last, Brock! ROARK Oh, do you know this gentleman already? BROCK Yeah, he's a real jackass. DALLAS Ya' know, some fella at the gym tried to trick me, but I ain't falling for anything! BROCK Do you have a question? DALLAS Now wait just a darn minute! Yeah, I do got a question! I want to throw down with yer Pokémon! ROARK Did he ask that question yet? BROCK No. I guess if he really wants to battle me, we can do it right here on stage. BROCK (T.H.) Normally I would never battle, especially not in public, but this guy was annoying me, and I figured I could make an *** out of him in front of everyone. ROARK I'll ref, then! DALLAS climbs up on stage, and he heads opposite to BROCK on the stage. ROARK moves off to the side. ELIZABETH Good luck, Brock! You're in a battle! You will win the battle! I know it! ROARK So how many Pokémon will you be using? DALLAS I don't got any Pokémon! I got my fists! Houston and San Antonio never failed me before! ROARK Uh... are you okay with this, Brock? BROCK It's exactly why I accepted his challenge in the first place. Geodude, go! BROCK throws a Pokéball to release his GEODUDE. GEODUDE Geo, geo! DALLAS Heh, ya' really think that there Geodude can stand up to me! We'll see about that, pardner! DALLAS runs straight at GEODUDE and throws a punch at it. GEODUDE stays still, but DALLAS is obviously in pain. DALLAS Ow! That hurt like a Clefairy with a machete! How could Houston fail me?! BROCK Geodude is a Rock type. You basically punched a rock. How did you not see this coming? DALLAS My fists are unstoppable, that's how! ROARK Well, I'm calling this. Brock wins! ELIZABETH Yeah! I knew you could win, Brock! DALLAS storms off the stage as BROCK returns GEODUDE to its Pokéball. DALLAS I ain't giving up! One day I'll beat ya'! BROCK That's not going to happen. ROARK I say we end the questions now. I think what this audience really wants is for us to talk about our experiences! BROCK Okay. Good. I don't think I can take anymore questions. BROCK (T.H.) Really, the questions were more on topic than they have been at previous conventions. ROARK Okay, so I've been a gym leader for about one year. Brock, how long have you had the position? BROCK I don't know. The time just seems to fly by. ROARK But anyway, we're both Rock type trainers! We aren't the only Rock type gym leaders though; there's also Roxanne of Rustboro City. She's very charming! BROCK Why would you bring that up? ROARK It's just a fun fact I thought I'd bring up. ROXANNE enters the auditorium, but BROCK and ROARK don't notice. BROCK You're just adding insult to injury! You know that I'm pissed off that you had sex with her! ROXANNE Why would you talk about that in front of everyone?! Everyone in the auditorium turns around to see the source of the shouting. ROXANNE becomes visibly upset and runs out of the room. BROCK decides to give chase. BROCK Dammit! This is all your fault, Roark! BROCK exits the room. ROARK Anyway, training Rock types is a lot of fun! INT. CELADON HOTEL LOBBY BROCK catches up to ROXANNE in the lobby. BROCK Roxanne! Wait! ROXANNE No! Get away from me! ROXANNE pushes BROCK away. BROCK Why are you doing this to me? Why did you sleep with Roark?! ROXANNE Brock, you're so immature! Just get over it already! For Arceus's sake, I'm an adult! I'm going to be having casual sex with people; it doesn't mean I'm in love with all of them! You have to blow everything out of proportion! BROCK So does that mean I still have a chance with you? ROXANNE Don't talk to me right now! I'm out of here! ROXANNE storms out of the hotel. BROCK (T.H.) Well, she didn't say no. That makes it one of the best interactions with a woman I've ever had! Touchdown! ELIZABETH, who had been secretly watching the argument the whole time, decides to approach BROCK. ELIZABETH It's okay, Brock. She was a hussy anyway! I'm nice and pure! We should go out sometime! BROCK Who are you again? ELIZABETH I'm your biggest fan! BROCK Oh. What was your name again? ELIZABETH It's Elizabeth, silly! How could you forget the future love of your life's name? BROCK Future love of my life!? I thought you were my biggest fan? ELIZABETH The two aren't mutually exclusive! BROCK Okay... well, I have to go now! Hopefully I'll never see you again! ELIZABETH (T.H.) The best thing about Brock is his humor! "Hopefully I'll never see you again"? That was hilarious! I know deep down, he loves me! INT. CELADON HOTEL ROOM BROCK is packing his things when ROARK enters the room. ROARK You're leaving already?! We still have two more restaurants to try! BROCK This weekend was a disaster for me. I just want to get back to the gym. ROARK I guess I'll ask Alice to go out to eat with me! She's nice too! BROCK I don't want to see Alice right now. I'm not sure if I'd be able to explain that outburst during the program. As if on cue, ALICE barges into the room. ALICE Brock, what the hell happened during your program?! I heard it was a total train wreck! BROCK I may have yelled at Roark for sleeping with a woman I had the hots for. It's no big deal. ALICE No big deal?! Brock, it's a big deal! People ate it up! Apparently everyone loves a good disaster. I was worried that it'd end up as a PR disaster, but if something like that will get more butts into seats, I'm willing to get you and Roark to come back to host another program next year! BROCK Oh! Well... ROARK Of course we'll do it! BROCK I'm not sure. ALICE Think about it. If you do accept, I'll make sure that the open bar is a lot better than it has been. We've been watering the drinks down since last year so that we can spend less money on alcohol. BROCK (T.H.) I knew it! BROCK Well, I'll give it some thought. As for now, I'm leaving. Alice, it was nice seeing you again. Roark... I saw you again. Bye. BROCK leaves the room. ROARK Alice, do you want to go out to eat with me? ALICE I'd love to! BROCK (T.H.) What a convention! There was sex, alcohol, and intrigue! I only wish that some of the sex involved me. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK enters the gym with his suitcases to find LIAM waiting for him. LIAM You're finally back, sir! BROCK I am! Did you do a good job taking care of the gym? LIAM Of course I did! I didn't hand out a single badge! How did the convention go, sir? BROCK It was okay. The good news is that the open bar will be a lot better next year. Now then, did anything important happen when I was gone? LIAM Um... nothing! Nothing important at all! LIAM (T.H.) Hey, I'm not technically lying, because... hm... I don't consider lawsuits important! Yup, that's it! And now that I somehow justified it, I can sleep easy! All of a sudden, ELIZABETH barges into the gym. ELIZABETH Brock! It's you! This is your gym! I'm so excited to be here! LIAM Do you know her? ELIZABETH jumps over to LIAM. ELIZABETH You must be Liam, right? You're the gym assistant! You help out Brock! I know so much about you! LIAM Have we met before? How do you know my name?! BROCK Crazy stalker girl, why are you even here right now? ELIZABETH I followed you back from the convention! I'm going to hang out around the gym all the time now! Isn't that great? BROCK Do you even live anywhere near Pewter City? ELIZABETH Absolutely not! But my parents have been trying to kick me out of the house since all I do when I'm not at work is go on my fansite for you, so I got a hotel room at Pewter City! They won't miss me at all! BROCK That's nice... for them. ELIZABETH I'm going to be here everyday! Then, we're going to become best friends! Then, we're going to become lovers! Then, we're going to get married! Isn't that great, Brock?! BROCK Er... BROCK (T.H.) I'm not sure if I can handle this girl being around all the time. Actually, strike that, I AM sure I can't handle having her around. I better find a way to get rid of her. |
Hurrah for more Roark, I have to say. Roxanne made an, uh, interesting appearance as well, one could put it. =p I also liked seeing some othr minor characters appear including Dallas actually taking on Geodude...with predictable results. XD
I knew that things would start going wrong(er) when Liam assumed that nickname as well, heh - big mistake on his part. I certainly enjoyed reading about his new 'tougher' personality however and his interactions with visitors and declarations like how he's so tough he's drinking a drink he doesn't like (le gasp!). The convention was also amusing, and I wonder how Brock will get rid of the fangirl - I suppose even he has to draw the line somewhere. =p Quote:
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Bleh, planned to do this review earlier, but electricity had cut off at my neighborhood. LONG STORY. >.>;
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Haha, this is my favorite episode thus far. Really great follow up from last episode with the aftermath of the Roark and Roxanne one night stand ordeal and Gladys confronting Liam. Speaking of the latter, oh dear things are really getting serious now. I expect a lot of Ace Attorney references. :P I want to say real quick is it just me, or is Brock clever for once? That short battle between Geodude and Dallas is very funny. Actually, nah, I take that back. Brock is lucky he’s a rock type gym leader and that Dallas doesn’t have any Pokemon with him. Oh, Elizabeth. Indeed, she’s such a huge fangirl for going to the convention and then immediately right after stays at Pewter City. Good luck trying to get rid of her, Brock! XD Nothing else to say but that I’m so looking forward to next chapter! And yes, I know the chapters are posted at Serebii already, but I'll just wait for the updates here. :P |
bobandbill, Liam really shouldn't have reused the name Regis all the way back from Episode 1. Now he's caught! :O
And poor Dallas, he really should have seen it coming. Bay, even Brock is smart enough to realize that punching a rock is probably a bad idea, so he'd relish the chance to battle Dallas now as it would make him look good in front of a lot of people. At least until they start talking about Roxanne. :P |
Episode 8: Sweepstakes Mania EXT. PEWTER CITY STREET LIAM is walking on the sidewalk as he makes his way to the gym. ELIZABETH spots him and runs over to him. ELIZABETH Liam! Hi! LIAM Oh... hey... you. ELIZABETH This is great! You're going to the gym, right? Two friends, walking together! We're friends, right? LIAM I don't even know your name. ELIZABETH Ha! You're almost as funny as Brock! LIAM (TALKING HEAD) I'm not too thrilled about this girl coming into work every day, but at least she isn't getting a paycheck. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK is sitting in his office, flipping through his old high school yearbook. BROCK (T.H.) After Roxanne accused me of being immature at the convention, I've been doing some serious self reflecting. And what better way to do that than to go through my yearbook back from high school! LIAM and ELIZABETH walk into the office. LIAM Morning, sir. Unfortunately, this one came with me. ELIZABETH Good morning, Brock! It's morning! That's the early time of the day! BROCK Where did I go wrong? LIAM What are you talking about, sir? BROCK holds up his yearbook. BROCK I've been looking through my old yearbook. I'll tell you, those were the best days of my life. And now look at me! I don't even have a girlfriend! LIAM Who was your girlfriend back in high school, sir? BROCK Oh, I didn't have one, but that's not important. ELIZABETH You have me! LIAM No one asked you! BROCK flips to his picture in his yearbook and shows it to LIAM and ELIZABETH. BROCK Look at me back then! I was on top of the world! ELIZABETH Wow! You look just as handsome as you do now! That is a great picture! I like it! BROCK But now, I'm on the bottom of the world. LIAM Sir, I don't think you've ever lived in the North Pole or the South Pole. BROCK flips to another page of the yearbook that shows the track team. BROCK Look at this! The track team! LIAM You ran track back in high school? BROCK Of course not, but I was best friends with those guys! I even bought a varsity jacket off of one of them! Those were the days! ELIZABETH But since I'm here the days are even better, right? BROCK Liam, get her out of here. I need to wallow in my self pity for a bit. LIAM Yes, sir! Come on! LIAM and ELIZABETH exit the office. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA ELIZABETH We have a problem. It seems like Brock is stuck in some sort of nostalgic stupor. What do we do?! LIAM Why are you asking me? ELIZABETH Well, you've knows Brock for a while. How do you usually solve situations like this? LIAM Oh, Brock always comes up with some sort of scheme to solve our problems. I'm never very helpful when it comes to this kind of stuff. ELIZABETH Argh! What do we do?! LIAM I don't know! Do you have anything I can squat with? Squatting will get my brain going! ELIZABETH Liam, you're assistant to the greatest gym leader EVER! I expect more from you! LIAM (T.H.) Have I become too reliant on squatting? No. But really... yes. LIAM Well, if you aren't going to give me anything to squat with, you can expect nothing! ELIZABETH I guess I'm going to have to snap him out of it myself! ELIZABETH storms away. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE ELIZABETH barges into the office. BROCK is still looking at his yearbook. ELIZABETH Brock, put that yearbook away right now! ELIZABETH (T.H.) Yes, I love Brock... but there is such a thing as tough love. BROCK sighs. BROCK Did you know that my friend Steve was voted most likely to succeed? ELIZABETH Huh? BROCK I wonder if he became successful after all. He's probably sitting in his yacht right now, wearing a top hat and a monocle, right next to his high class prostitute. ELIZABETH Brock, why are you doing this to yourself? BROCK And what vote did I win during high school? Nothing! ELIZABETH There are more categories than students, you know. Most people don't get voted for in any category. BROCK I was voted most likely to do nothing! ELIZABETH That was a category? BROCK And once my high school reunion comes around, guess what? I'll just prove to all of them that they were right! I'm nothing! ELIZABETH You're not nothing! You're the greatest gym leader ever! BROCK If I want to be better than Steve, I'm going to have to make a lot of money, and fast! ELIZABETH Are you ignoring me? BROCK I got it! I'll enter a bunch of contests! Maybe I'll buy some lottery tickets as well! I need to go get Liam! BROCK runs out of the office. ELIZABETH (T.H.) I feel like he was talking to himself the whole time... BROCK (T.H.) Huh? There was someone in the room with me? Are you sure? INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK jolts over to LIAM, with ELIZABETH following soon after. BROCK Liam, I'm going to need your help! LIAM What is it, sir? BROCK We're going to be entering a lot of contests! I have to work on my computer to find as many corporate sweepstakes that I can find! You need to get down to the PokéMart and buy as many lottery tickets as possible! LIAM I'm not old enough to buy lottery tickets, sir. BROCK Uh... BROCK looks at ELIZABETH. BROCK Take her with you! She can buy them! LIAM Great idea, sir! That's why you're the boss! ELIZABETH I guess we'll be on our way then! LIAM and ELIZABETH leave the gym. BROCK (T.H.) This is such a great plan to secure my financial future, I don't get how more people are doing it! Actually, maybe you shouldn't broadcast any of these parts. I don't want people stealing my secret to success! EXT. PEWTER CITY STREET LIAM and ELIZABETH are walking down the street to the PokéMart. ELIZABETH Liam, you know we have to put a stop to this, right? LIAM Why? This plan is foolproof! ELIZABETH Even though Brock's the best person ever, those contests are all fixed! He can't win any of them! ELIZABETH (T.H.) I don't see why it's crazy to think all of those sweepstakes are fixed. It's no more crazy than thinking the former Kanto champion being assassinated was just a cover up to hide the fact he was abducted by aliens! LIAM Brock has never steered me wrong! I'm sure he'll be rich by tomorrow! ELIZABETH Fine, I'll go along with this for now, but only until I can convince Brock that this is a bad idea! LIAM Okay! By the way, do you think you can buy all these lottery tickets? I don't have any money on me. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM and ELIZABETH enter the office to find BROCK on the computer. LIAM We got your lottery tickets, sir! LIAM slams a bunch of lottery tickets on the desk. BROCK Excellent! You played my lucky numbers, right? LIAM We played your lucky numbers on ALL of them! That increases your odds of winning! ELIZABETH I don't really know math, but it makes sense to me! BROCK Good job! I've been searching through sweepstakes online. Mostly I've been sticking to ones that just require a name and address. ELIZABETH You can't do that! You have to enter the ones that require some original thought! Those have the big payoffs! BROCK Listen, I don't think you understand what I'm trying to do here, and I also have no clue as to who you are. But anyway, I don't want to enter any contests that require creativity! I'm trying to make money with as little effort as possible! ELIZABETH You'll never be rich with that attitude! Hold on... ELIZABETH moves BROCK away from the computer and starts surfing the internet. BROCK (T.H.) Right now, if I was to win every contest I entered, I'd be richer by five grand. I'm feeling pretty lucky. ELIZABETH Found something! LIAM What is it? ELIZABETH Shellder Soda is holding a contest to see who can come up with the best slogan for their products. LIAM Hm... I got one! Shellder Soda: it's Shellderlicious! ELIZABETH Well... we can use that as a backup if we have to. Brock, do you have any ideas? BROCK seems deep in thought. BROCK Hm... LIAM Do you have anything, sir? BROCK Shellder Soda: you know it's good. LIAM Brilliant! ELIZABETH Genius! BROCK We'll win this contest yet! Enter that catchphrase, random girl! ELIZABETH hurriedly types the entry into the submission form online. ELIZABETH Done! Let's enter another one! ELIZABETH gets back to surfing the internet. LIAM You'll be rich in no time, Brock! ELIZABETH Found another one! Rage Candy Bar wants a name for their new chocolate bar! BROCK Symphony! LIAM Wow, sir! It's so eloquent! ELIZABETH I'll enter that into the website now. BROCK Give me another! I'm on a roll! ELIZABETH I got an idea! How about you take that roll out into the gym and you be the best gym leader you can be? BROCK Hm... you know what? I got a better idea! I'm not going to make any money sitting around as a gym leader! How about I take my roll into the Pewter City Casino instead? I can make tons of cash there! ELIZABETH That wasn't what I was getting at... LIAM I've always wanted to go to the casino! BROCK What are we waiting for?! Let's get moving! BROCK and LIAM rush out of the office. ELIZABETH (T.H.) I'm not getting through to him. Maybe I should use my feminine wiles. INT. PEWTER CITY CASINO BROCK, LIAM, and ELIZABETH walk into the casino. LIAM seems overwhelmed by all the lights and noises coming from the slot machines. ELIZABETH I never knew Pewter City had a casino. BROCK Sure is convenient, right? LIAM You should play one of those machines, sir! They look fun! BROCK I'm more of a card man! BROCK finds a card table and sits down. LIAM and ELIZABETH stand next to him. The DEALER is already at the table, along with JEFF, a bald man with a goatee, and SUSAN, a woman covered with gaudy makeup and extravagant jewelry. BROCK Deal me in! DEALER You need to place your bet first, sir. BROCK Oh, sorry. BROCK places some chips in the middle of the table. The DEALER first deals a five and an eight to JEFF, then a six and a nine to BROCK, then a seven and a king to SUSAN, and finally deals a ten and a three to himself. BROCK I'll go first! BROCK turns to JEFF. BROCK Got any twos? JEFF Psh... JEFF (T.H.) My name's Jeff... that's right, I'm THE Jeff. I've competed in the World Blackjack Showdown, World Blackjack Showdown: All Stars, World Blackjack Showdown: All Stars Versus Celebrities, and World Blackjack Showdown: Humans Versus Pokémon. So yeah, I'm pretty good at blackjack. DEALER We're not playing Go Fish, sir. BROCK Oh, silly me! BROCK looks around the table. BROCK So who here has the old maid? SUSAN I take offense to that! SUSAN (T.H.) I'm in my EARLY fifties. Early means young. So I'm young. Don't let anyone who claims that I got plastic surgery sway you otherwise! DEALER The game is blackjack, sir. BROCK Oh! That game! Okay, I got it! The DEALER turns to JEFF. DEALER Hit or stay? JEFF Hit. JEFF is dealt a seven. JEFF I'll stay. The DEALER now turns to BROCK. DEALER Hit or stay? BROCK Hm... ELIZABETH You can do it, Brock! ELIZABETH starts rubbing BROCK on the back, which visibly disturbs him. BROCK Er... I'll hit. BROCK is dealt a nine. DEALER That's a bust, sir. BROCK Hah! In your face, goatee douchebag! I win! JEFF Please. You suck. DEALER Sir, you went over twenty-one. That means you lost. BROCK Oh, right! Blackjack! I'm sorry, I forgot. ELIZABETH Oh, you did your best, love! ELIZABETH throws her arms around BROCK, which causes him to start shaking, disturbed. ELIZABETH (T.H.) I think it's working! The DEALER finally turns to SUSAN. DEALER Hit or stay, madam? SUSAN Oh, you can call me Susan. When do you get off shift? Did you know I'm younger than my sister? DEALER I just need to know if you're going to hit or stay. SUSAN Fine, I'll hit. SUSAN is dealt a five. DEALER That's a bust. My turn. The DEALER deals himself a ten. DEALER And that's a bust for me. You win, sir. The DEALER hands the chips over to JEFF. BROCK Okay, time out everyone! Liam, I need to talk to you. BROCK and LIAM move away from the table, and begin talking in really soft voices. BROCK Liam, we got a problem. That girl is using her feminine wiles on me. LIAM She's such a weirdo! What do we do? BROCK She needs to stop. Liam, I'm sorry, but can you use your masculine wiles on her? LIAM Masculine wiles? BROCK Yes. If you start seducing her, she'll be too distracted to seduce me. LIAM She's a lot older than me, sir. I'm not sure if she'll fall for it. BROCK Well, we'll find out. Let's get back in there! BROCK and LIAM walk back over to the table, and BROCK sits down and puts his chips in. BROCK Good, you waited for us! DEALER I didn't have anything better to do. DEALER (T.H.) I literally don't have anything better to do today. This casino is government run, and unfortunately I got convicted of a misdemeanor, so it's either do nothing here or do nothing in jail. JEFF Well I had a problem with it. Some of us are here to play a game, you know. SUSAN And some of us are here to flirt with men much younger than ourselves! The DEALER deals cards to JEFF, BROCK, SUSAN, and himself. BROCK gets a pair of twos. The DEALER turns to JEFF. DEALER Hit or stay? JEFF Hit. As the DEALER hands JEFF a card, LIAM approaches ELIZABETH and starts rubbing her back. ELIZABETH What are you doing? LIAM You're so pretty and soft! ELIZABETH Er... I have to go over there now. ELIZABETH walks away as JEFF goes bust. BROCK gives LIAM a thumbs up. ELIZABETH (T.H.) Liam is being creepy. If people see someone that young flirting with me, I'm going to spend the rest of my days working at this casino! The DEALER now turns to BROCK. DEALER Hit or stay? BROCK Hit! The DEALER hands BROCK another two. BROCK Three of a kind! I stay! DEALER Sir, your card total is six. If you hit, you're guaranteed to not go bust. BROCK Why would I want another card when I have a hand as great as this?! The DEALER sighs and turns to SUSAN. SUSAN You don't have to say anything. You can hit me. DEALER (T.H.) The female clientele are always flirting with me, but that's just because they think I can hand out chips for free. And the dice. You don't want to know what they do with the dice. The DEALER sighs and hands SUSAN a card. DEALER That's a bust. And now my turn. The DEALER hands himself a card. DEALER And I bust too. Looks like Mister Three of a Kind wins! The DEALER hands BROCK his chips. ELIZABETH notices this and walks over. ELIZABETH Great job, Brock! Maybe you should quit while you're ahead! BROCK Oh, I'm quitting blackjack, but I'm going to get even more ahead. I thought of an even better way to make money! ELIZABETH Oh... BROCK gets up from the table and leaves the casino, with LIAM and ELIZABETH following him. JEFF (T.H.) That man was absolutely the worst person I have ever played blackjack with, and I've played with a Growlithe once. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK, LIAM, and ELIZABETH are waiting in the office. ELIZABETH Who did you call, Brock? BROCK I called a stock broker! Buying stocks is like gambling, but on an even greater scale! I'm going to be rich! LIAM Don't you already have stock in Team Rocket, sir? BROCK Yeah, but that stock has been stagnant ever since that Game Corner in Celadon mysteriously came under new management. A man in a disheveled suit, STEVE, walks into the office. STEVE Hello, everyone! Are you ready to make some money? BROCK Wait, I remember you! You're Steve from high school! You were voted most likely to succeed! STEVE Ah, you're Brock, right? I'd recognize those eyes anywhere! I was hoping no one would remember that little vote, though. BROCK Why? Look at you! You're a stock broker! Why does your suit look so dirty, though? STEVE Oh, this? I bought it second hand. Well... I didn't really buy it, more like stole it off of a homeless person. It makes me wonder where he got it from. BROCK So do you have a nice yacht or something now? STEVE Oh, you're just trying to flatter me! But yes, I do have a yacht. If only I could get it out of that parking lot now... LIAM I've always wanted to go on a yacht! Can I visit sometime? STEVE Of course you can, little buddy! You'd just have to deal with the rabid Sentret that I can't get off the yacht, though. LIAM Oh... BROCK How about we move away from that topic, hm? What stocks do you think would be good to buy, Steve? STEVE I'm glad you asked! Right now, the best companies to invest in are car companies! I have these records from twenty years ago and they all seem to be doing pretty well! ELIZABETH Aren't all the car companies failing? That seems like a bad investment. STEVE I would never steer you wrong. You see, I get a commission based on how well your stock does, and I need all the cash I can get in order to fuel my drug addiction! BROCK Oh, you know what? I'm not sure if I want to buy stock anymore. STEVE If you say so, buddy! If you ever change my mind, just give me a ring! STEVE (T.H.) Hey, I'm not sure who's watching this, but don't be afraid to ask me to be your personal stock broker! That even includes you, cameraman! Wait... do cameramen buy stock? STEVE leaves the office. BROCK I think it's time to call it a day now. ELIZABETH That's it? You've given up on your sweepstakes mania? That's great! Wait, what about all of those lottery tickets you made me buy, though? BROCK Oh, those? Eh... keep them, I guess. I'm content with myself now. BROCK (T.H.) When this day first started, Steve was most likely to succeed and I was a nobody, but now, Steve's a bigger loser than me, which is saying something! At least I don't have a drug addiction and steal clothes from homeless people... though ignoring the dirt, that was a nice suit. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM and ELIZABETH exit the office. ELIZABETH Great job today, Liam! We were able to cure Brock of his contest obsession! LIAM What did we do? We just got lucky that Steve turned out to be a huge lamer. ELIZABETH Oh, don't be so negative! I'll see you tomorrow, along with Brock, the love of my life! ELIZABETH exits the gym. LIAM (T.H.) I can't handle any more Elizabeth! Brock and I have a very delicate dynamic, and she's ruining it! Soon, Brock won't be asking me for help anymore, even though I can never seem to help him anyway! And then what reason would I have to be around? EXT. PEWTER CITY STREET ELIZABETH is walking back to her hotel room. ELIZABETH (T.H.) Today was great! Sure, I spent over fifty dollars on lottery tickets, but I was able to do it for the love of my life, Brock! And once I finally manage to get Brock to fall in love with me, I'll be a TV star! Here's to hoping that you'll be filming the exploits of Brock for a very, VERY long time! |
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I really love the first part where Brock checks his high school yearbook. Heh, just recently I looked through my yearbook and man, I hate some of the club and sport pictures I was in. XD I like Elizabeth this chapter as you give her a bit more personality this time around. I'll have to agree with her those sweepstakes are fixed (has done them before with online poetry contests and with hilarious results D: ). It is also nice of her to try to get Brock back into doing gym battles, even though it didn't work in the end, heh. Oh boy, Steve. Well, stock brokerage isn't easy, haha. Another funny and enjoyable chapter there. Can't wait for the next one! |
Bay, originally the plot of this episode was just going to revolve around Brock getting nostalgic for his high school days. :P Then I realized that it wasn't substantial enough for its own plot, and I also had to put in some events that would lead to the ending I wanted, so I think around Chapter 3 I scrapped what I had planned and wrote the outline for this instead. XD
Elizabeth is an interesting character, and she'll become (more? less?) important as the story goes on. :P |
Episode 9: Kanto Gym Leader Council INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is hanging around in the gym when ELIZABETH walks in. ELIZABETH Good morning, Brock! Wait... ELIZABETH looks around the gym. ELIZABETH Where's Brock? LIAM The Kanto Gym Leader Council is meeting today. He had to go to Fuchsia City. ELIZABETH Oh, good! I have to tell you something. LIAM Oh brother. LIAM (TALKING HEAD) Elizabeth has told me a lot of things... mostly the varying degrees in which she loves Brock. ELIZABETH Remember last week when Brock was entering all those contests and he made us buy all of those lottery tickets? LIAM Made you. I didn't buy any. ELIZABETH Anyway, it turns out I won the big jackpot. At first, they thought the prize was going to be split by a bunch of people, but that's just because all the tickets I bought had the same numbers. Now, I'm a multimillionaire! LIAM Why didn't I hear about this in the news? ELIZABETH Oh, nowadays you can just hire a lawyer to represent you and claim the prize for you. LIAM So why are you telling me all of this? ELIZABETH Because you need to keep this all a secret from Brock! LIAM So you're telling me this so that I don't tell anyone this. LIAM (T.H.) I'm good at keeping secrets. One time I had a stomach virus for a year and a half and no one even knew! But I don't want to keep Elizabeth's crappy secret. ELIZABETH Listen, I love Brock, and I want him to fall in love with my, not my money. If he ends up wanting to marry me just because it would be good for him financially, all that I've been working towards will have been for naught! LIAM Fine, whatever, I'll keep your secret. ELIZABETH Yay! Thanks so much, Liam! ELIZABETH starts walking towards the office. LIAM You aren't leaving? ELIZABETH Oh, I thought I'd just make myself at home. I want to wait for Brock to get back! LIAM Great... INT. MEETING ROOM BROCK (T.H.) So today the Kanto Gym Leader Council is meeting. The meetings are always at Fuchsia City because Koga is the presiding officer of our little council. Usually these gatherings turn out to go bad, but when they don't go bad... they go even worse. BROCK walks into the meeting room. MISTY, ERIKA, a girl dressed in a flowery kimono, and BLAINE, a bald man with a white mustache and sunglasses, are already waiting. MISTY Well well well, look who it is. ERIKA Ew! A man! Get out of here; I don't want to catch man cooties! BLAINE Heh, Erika gave me the same greeting as well. Hello, Brock. BROCK goes over to shake hands with BLAINE. BROCK Good to see you, Blaine. How are things going over at Cinnabar? BLAINE It's terrible! Recently a bunch of people of a lower socioeconomic status and different race than mine have been moving there! Luckily I have a plan that should go over well with the council that will solve my little problem. ERIKA Who cares about your problems? You're a stupid guy! ERIKA (T.H.) Misty, Sabrina, and myself are the only people on this council that have any smart ideas! MISTY We probably won't get around to your problem anyway. Supposedly we're going to discuss Team Rocket. BROCK Team Rocket? I used to own stock in them, but it went bad so I sold it all. MISTY Yeah, well it turns out they're a criminal syndicate. They've been stealing Pokémon or something. GIOVANNI, a short haired man sharply dressed in a suit, enters the room. ERIKA Ew! A man! Get out of here; I don't want to catch man cooties! MISTY Hi Giovanni. GIOVANNI Are we starting soon? I have an urgent meeting with the CEO of Silph Co. and I don't want to be late. GIOVANNI (T.H.) In addition to my job as a gym leader, I conduct a lot of business on the side. I actually ran a casino in Celadon, but I was forced out of ownership by some kid.Why are you filming me, anyway? You aren't collecting some sort of evidence, are you? MISTY Well, Koga hasn't shown up yet, so I have no idea when we'll start. GIOVANNI Okay then. LT. SURGE, a man dressed in army fatigues, and SABRINA, a woman with flowing dark hair dressed in a strange purple jumpsuit, walk into the meeting room. SABRINA Surge, you can't just go to war with everyone. You need tact. LT. SURGE Dammit, Sabrina! I'm not even talking to you! Get out of my head! SABRINA (T.H.) Yes, I can read minds. Stop thinking about how much you want to do me. MISTY Sabrina, can you give the mind reading a break just this once? SABRINA I don't think so. I need to be on the alert at all times. GIOVANNI (T.H.) It's a good thing that I've trained my brain to block mind reading. Why? For the purposes of this interview, let's just say I have perverted thoughts and leave it at that. Yes, nothing more than perverted thoughts. It absolutely has nothing to do with crimes that I did not commit. MISTY Whatever, just don't be an *** about it. LT. SURGE Where's Koga?! I heard that we're going to be discussing Team Rocket and I got the perfect way to get rid of those bastards! BLAINE He's coming. So hey, did anyone get challenged by some kid named Hal? MISTY Oh, him? What a joke! I wiped the floor with him. ERIKA I obviously beat him, because he was a boy, and all males suck. BLAINE I beat him too. He was the weakest challenger in the history of the Cinnabar Island Gym. The funny thing was, he already had one badge. Who the hell lost to him? BROCK I don't know. It was probably the lieutenant. He cares more about the army than Pokémon battling. SABRINA Nope. It was Brock. BROCK Dammit! BROCK (T.H.) I don't have a lot of respect around here. It's a shame, too, because I'm always coming up with great ideas. One time I suggested that we change the name of the Kanto Gym Leader Council to the Kanto Gym Leader Committee. It nearly passed; it only needed seven more votes! All of a sudden, a poof of smoke appears. A sharp eyed man dressed in a ninja outfit, KOGA, emerges from it. KOGA Hello! Let's get started! KOGA (T.H.) I'm Koga. I'm the gym leader here at Fuchsia City, I'm the presiding officer of the Kanto Gym Leader Council, and I love making an entrance! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is polishing rocks on the battlefield when he hears a knock on the door. LIAM Ugh. Am I going to have to scare a challenger away? LIAM goes to open the door, and ROXANNE walks in. ROXANNE Hello. Is Brock in? ROXANNE (T.H.) Things did not end well with Brock at the convention, and I feel kind of bad about it. I thought about what I did, and maybe it was wrong for me to sleep with Roark when Brock obviously hates him. LIAM Brock isn't here right now. Why do you need to talk to him? ROXANNE Eh, we both did some stupid **** at that convention earlier, and I just want to apologize to him. ELIZABETH comes barging out of the office. ELIZABETH What the hell are you doing here, you hussy?! ROXANNE Weren't you that girl obsessed with Brock? I have a better question: why are YOU here? LIAM Tell me about it! She's a real pain in the ***. ELIZABETH Well guess what? Brock wants to marry me! So I guess while I'm enjoying life with Brock you'll be doomed to live as a spinster for eternity! ROXANNE What?! You and Brock are engaged?! I come all the way here hoping that I can somehow convince Brock that we need to move past the convention, but it seems he moved on pretty fast anyway! That's it; I'm out of here! LIAM No! Don't- ROXANNE storms out and slams the door shut. LIAM You have no idea what you just did. Brock really has the hots for Roxanne. ELIZABETH Well, hopefully he'll have the hots for me soon! LIAM (T.H.) This girl is way too obsessed with Brock. There's something... off about her. Would you happen to have any idea what it is? INT. MEETING ROOM KOGA So our first topic on the agenda is Team Rocket. BLAINE Hold up! KOGA What is it, Blaine? BLAINE Before we start going on about those folks, I need to discuss the problem on Cinnabar Island. Too many... "urban" people have been moving in! KOGA And what exactly are we supposed to do about it? BLAINE Gentrification! MISTY Blaine, rich people don't want to live on an island. Sure, they may want to go to vacation on an island, or buy their own private island, but they don't want to live on like a town on an island! BLAINE When has gentrification ever failed? If we build it, they will come! I just need funding from the council in order to build mansions on Cinnabar Island so that rich people can move in. KOGA Do I even have to take a vote on this? We all say no, right? Everyone in the room nods. KOGA Okay. Next- ERIKA Wait just a minute! If that racist codger gets to flap his yap off, so do I! KOGA Fine. What do you want, Erika? ERIKA Guys are gross. I don't want to be anywhere near them, especially when I use certain facilities. We need to segregate restrooms by gender! BROCK They're already segregated! I know because I've tried to get into the women's room on many occasions! KOGA (T.H.) The council likes to make ridiculous requests. Two months ago Brock asked for five million dollars in order to build something he called "Fun Land". No way was that going to happen, so we gave him half of what he asked for instead. BROCK (T.H.) Fun Land? That's a work in progress. Forever in progress. KOGA Now can we finally discuss Team Rocket? GIOVANNI Yes. Though I don't see what the problem is. They seem to be a good group of people. MISTY I got a ton of reports from Mt. Moon saying that members of Team Rocket were stealing Pokémon from passerby. GIOVANNI Well I'm sure they had a very good and legal reason to do so! GIOVANNI (T.H.) Theoretically speaking, if I, as a casino order, wanted to save money capturing Pokémon for use as prizes at the casino, I could, and this is purely theoretical, have members of my theoretical illegitimate business steal Pokémon from trainers. This is absolutely theoretical, of course! KOGA We still have to do something about this! We can't have a gang of crooks running amok! LT. SURGE You know, I have an idea... MISTY No, don't say nuke them! BLAINE He's so going to say that. SABRINA It's exactly what he's thinking. LT. SURGE We nuke them! Everyone except for LT. SURGE groans. KOGA INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICESurge, we've been over this. You can't just go around nuking whoever you please! LT. SURGE Listen, I have the artillery, I have the men, I don't see why I can't do this! MISTY Because it's an absurd idea! LT. SURGE No it's not! Let me tell you something! Electric Pokémon saved me during the war! They zapped my enemies into paralysis! But something else saved me during the war... SABRINA Nukes. MISTY We didn't need a mind reader to tell us that, Sabrina. LT. SURGE Nukes! Absolutely! BROCK (T.H.) The lieutenant has been telling us war stories that have been steadily growing in their unbelievability factor. First a Raichu blew someone's head off, but the last story he told involved him riding a Fearow over a warship in order to drop a nuke on it, all while waving the American flag above his head. LT. SURGE (T.H.) That story was only partially true. I was also wearing American flag patterned pants. BLAINE I honestly have some fears over Team Rocket. I'm afraid they may try and move to Cinnabar Island, as the water will make it hard for us to launch an attack on them. BUT... if we were to gentrify Cinnabar Island- KOGA We already voted on it, Blaine. No means no! BLAINE I'm just saying that Team Rocket would have less space to move onto if rich people already were on most of the property. KOGA Now that we have all the bad ideas out of the way, does anyone have any good ones? GIOVANNI I say just wait Team Rocket out. They may not even be up to anything anymore. ERIKA Only a man could come up with such a bad idea! My city's economy was nearly crippled by that casino scheme they were running! We can't let them go! BROCK I agree with Giovanni. I don't want to do anything that requires effort. LIAM is sitting at the desk. LIAM Elizabeth, can you come in? ELIZABETH walks into the office, and is surprised to see that the TV is displaying a freeze frame of herself. ELIZABETH What's this about? And how do you suddenly know my name?! LIAM Elizabeth, you were kind of a freak. Your obsession with Brock was unreal. It led me to think two things: either you had serious mental problems, or you have an ulterior motive. ELIZABETH You got me! I'm totally nuts! I'm crazy in love with Brock! LIAM I would have let you go, but then you scared Roxanne away. That was something that would seriously piss Brock off, so my only option was to ask the camera crew what your deal was. ELIZABETH Oh... LIAM They gave me a very interesting interview with you, and from what I understand, you're more interested in being a TV star than being Brock's girlfriend. ELIZABETH That doesn't seem right! I told them that in confidence! LIAM This thing is going to air eventually. You do know that, right? ELIZABETH Of course I know that! It's the only reason I'm bothering with Brock! Do you know who I am? LIAM A freak? ELIZABETH No! I'm an actress! Do you remember that big Poffin advertising campaign a few years back. LIAM No. ELIZABETH Well I was the star of it! People all around the country started reciting my catchphrase: "I want my Poffin please!" LIAM So you're a failed actress? ELIZABETH I haven't failed yet! After that commercial, I tried to move on to bigger and better things, like game show hosting or news anchoring, but every application was turned down! I couldn't stop though. I was like an Arcanine in heat! I needed a new job! LIAM I could have done without that analogy. ELIZABETH So one day, my brother comes home from traveling. You see, he's a trainer, and the only badge he was missing was the Boulder Badge. He heard that Brock was actually accepting challenges, so he made his way to the gym. Apparently Brock faked his death, but my brother told me one other thing: Brock was being filmed. As soon as news got out that Brock was alive after all, I knew that I needed to take my chance! If I could manage to become a reality TV star, I could eventually become a real star! LIAM So you tracked down Brock at that convention and pretended that you were in love with him? ELIZABETH Exactly! LIAM Well, I still think you may have mental problems. I'm confused on one thing though: if you're so desperate to have Brock fall in love with you, why hide the fact that you won the lottery? ELIZABETH If Brock knew about that money, I wouldn't get to keep it all to myself! LIAM (T.H.) Elizabeth is a real *****. INT. MEETING ROOM MISTY We can't just send someone to ask them nicely to stop! They're a criminal organization! ERIKA Well if you can't come up with a better peaceful solution, I refuse to support anything else! LT. SURGE Everyone, we have a saying in the army: if at first you don't succeed, nuke them! BLAINE That's not a saying. And there's no way nuking is a good idea! You know what a good idea is? Gentrification! KOGA Everyone! Quiet down! Brock, we haven't heard much from you other except for that you were in support of Giovanni's idea earlier. Have any new thoughts? SABRINA He's thinking about how much he has to pee right now. BROCK Well, Team Rocket doesn't seem very nice, so I say we form a task squad made up of Misty, the lieutenant, Erika, Sabrina, Blaine, Giovanni, and yourself in order to combat them. MISTY That task squad doesn't include you. ERIKA And there's no way I'm going to be in a violent organization with a bunch of men! LT. SURGE I refuse to join the task squad unless I can use nukes! KOGA No nukes! BLAINE Gentrification! ERIKA Men suck! BROCK Shut up! The room becomes silent. BROCK Everyone, we came here today to solve a problem. Our region is being ruined by a gang of thugs called Team Rocket. We have a reason to be united, and yet, all we're doing is bickering around in circles! We can either just keep arguing amongst ourselves without getting anything done, OR we can go out with dignity and just stop now! LT. SURGE I agree with Brock. It's not like I'm going to budge on this nuke thing anyway. GIOVANNI That is an excellent idea, and with that, I'm leaving! I have a very important meeting to attend to! GIOVANNI gets up and leaves the room. MISTY Brock, you're wrong! If we don't come up with a plan today, when will we ever come up with a plan? BROCK Um... next meeting, I guess? MISTY And we'll just end up bickering then too! We need to take action now! ERIKA I agree with Misty! BLAINE I agree with the side that will let me gentrify Cinnabar Island! SABRINA Brock, stop thinking about how hot Misty looks in those shorts. BROCK Please, I hate red heads! KOGA ENOUGH! The room becomes silent once again. KOGA Surge, you're an idiot. Nuking people will solve nothing. Sabrina, stop being such an ******* by reading people's minds. Erika, stop being a gigantic sexist. Blaine, stop talking about gentrification. It makes you seem like a racist. And Brock, that is the worst idea I have ever heard proposed in this council. We're here to get things done, not just give- wait... look at the time! Looks like this session of the Kanto Gym Leader Council has officially ended. Oh well, hopefully we'll have better luck next time. MISTY No! We need to solve this problem now! KOGA Misty, I would love to, but we just don't have the time! Sorry! KOGA disappears in a poof of smoke. MISTY I hope you're happy, Brock. We ended up getting nothing done! BLAINE My island will fall to urban decay! LT. SURGE And I don't get to use my nukes! BROCK (T.H.) Did I disappoint a lot of people? Yes. In the end, it doesn't really matter, because all of their ideas sucked anyway. BROCK Well, I'll see all of you at the next meeting! BROCK leaves the room. LT. SURGE Can I nuke something already? ERIKA The only way I'd get behind that is if Misty or Sabrina supported it! No way would I acknowledge a stupid man's idea! BLAINE Would Misty or Sabrina be willing to get behind gentrification too? MISTY (T.H.) It's hard being the only sane person in a room full of idiots. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK walks into the gym. LIAM is about to greet him, but ELIZABETH runs up first. ELIZABETH Brock! It's so good to see you again! How was your meeting? Was it good? I bet it was good! LIAM Hold on! Sir, I have something to tell you! ELIZABETH Don't you dare! LIAM (T.H.) I wasn't going to tell Brock about Elizabeth's scheme. It's way too complicated. I find it kind of funny that I actually believe it. Anyway, I had a surefire way to get rid of Elizabeth. LIAM Sir, earlier today, Roxanne visited. BROCK Roxanne? Does she want to date me now? LIAM Well, unfortunately, Elizabeth here told Roxanne that she was already going out with you and that you wanted to get married. BROCK What?! ELIZABETH Stop this right now, Liam! LIAM After Roxanne heard this, she stormed off, and I don't think she's ever coming back. BROCK turns to ELIZABETH and explodes in anger. BROCK YOU STUPID *****! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?! I PUT UP WITH ALL OF YOUR ********! I LET YOU COME TO THE GYM EVERYDAY! I LET YOU TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME EVEN THOUGH I NEVER RECIPROCATE IT! AND THEN YOU TURN AROUND AND MAKE THE WOMAN THAT I HAVE THE HOTS FOR THE MOST HATE ME?! DAMMIT! As Elizabeth breaks into tears, BROCK rips one of the rock from the arena up and chucks it at the wall. The rock shatters into pieces. BROCK GET OUT! GET OUT RIGHT NOW, YOU *****! I DON'T WANT TO EVER SEE YOU BACK HERE! ELIZABETH runs out of the gym, still crying. LIAM stares at BROCK, shocked. BROCK WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?! DON'T YOU HAVE WORK TO DO OR SOMETHING?! YOU AREN'T GETTING PAID FOR NOTHING! LIAM Yes, sir! I'll get right to work, sir! LIAM (T.H.) So... I guess I hit a sore spot of Brock's or something. I still think this was a good idea, though. As LIAM runs into the office, BROCK collapses onto the gym floor. BROCK DAMMIT! DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT! BROCK (T.H.) It's amazing how a single person can ruin your life in the span of one conversation. I don't even know what to do right now. I need water. I wish the Water type gym leader was hot so that I could actually enjoy drinking water. INT. MANSION LIVING ROOM ELIZABETH is sitting in her living room, drinking a glass of wine. ELIZABETH (T.H.) So for now, I think I'm just going to lay low for a bit. Brock will find it in his heart to forgive me eventually... I hope. I've never seen anybody yell like that before! It's terrifying! I was crying and I don't even legitimately love the man! I can't imagine what I would do if I actually was in love... probably **** my pants. Anyway, I will make my grand return soon enough, and when it does, it will kick Brock's ***! |
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Love this chapter. Really funny take on the gym leaders there. Of course, you know I’ll love the NUKEEEEEES. :p I feel sorry for Misty dealing with them, haha. The revelation of Elizabeth actually acting to fall in love with Brock is quite a twist there. Haha of course, who is actually sane enough to be a fan of Brock? :P It was a bad idea for her to shoo Roxanne like that though. Brock is actually scary when he’s mad. ._. Nonetheless, can't wait to see how this will turn out in the next few chapters. |
Episode 10: The Trial INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK and LIAM are searching around the office. BROCK I swore I left that coupon somewhere! LIAM We've torn the entire office up and haven't found anything, though! BROCK (T.H.) The other day, I got a "kids eat free" coupon for a local diner. I was going to take Liam out as thanks for the job he's doing, but I can't find it. And I can assure you, I am NOT paying for his meal under any circumstance. BROCK If we don't find this coupon, we aren't going out to eat! LIAM I've looked everywhere! I can't find it! BROCK Please, as if you can call what you're doing "looking". You haven't even lifted any papers up! LIAM You know what? Maybe we got some new coupons in the mail! I'll go check! LIAM leaves the office. BROCK (T.H.) I didn't get that coupon from the mail in the first place. I have no idea what that kid is talking about. LIAM returns with a stack of mail. LIAM Well, I don't see any coupons, but hold on, I have to do my squats first! LIAM begins squatting, but BROCK swipes the mail from him. LIAM Hey! BROCK Let's see what we got here. Junk, junk, junk, court summons, junk. Oh well. Wait... court summons?! LIAM Uh-oh. LIAM (T.H.) So I never told Brock that Gladys was going to bring him to court. I guess I should have taken into account that Gladys WAS going to bring him to court. BROCK rips the letter open and begins reading. BROCK "From the law offices of Joyce"... isn't that Gladys's friend? LIAM Er... it sounds familiar. BROCK "We request that you attend court tomorrow in order to stand trial for the case of Gladys v. Brock. If you do not show up, it will be assumed that you plead guilty, and you will be fined for damages to Gladys's reputation and property. Have a pleasant day, Joyce." What the hell is this all about?! LIAM No clue, sir. BROCK There's no way Gladys has any idea about our exploits with the tape, right? She has no case! LIAM Er... right. LIAM (T.H.) I'm starting to think I should tell Brock. BROCK So we'll go in there, fight this thing, and counter sue for wasting my time! LIAM I don't think you can actually sue someone for that, sir. BROCK Well you should be able to! All of a sudden, a man in a suit and bow tie, LARS, walks into the office. BROCK Hey, who the hell are you? Have you ever heard of knocking? LARS Ah, excuse me. I'm Lars. I'm a lawyer with the Pokémon League. LARS (T.H.) Being a lawyer for the Pokémon League is... exciting, to say the least. I'm still working on this big defense for Erika. I still can't figure out how to justify her closing the gym to all males. BROCK A lawyer?! Don't tell me you're going to sue me too?! LARS No, of course not! I was sent by the Pokémon League to help you! I'm their corporate lawyer! Whenever someone in the league gets involved in a lawsuit, I'm sent to help. LIAM Sir, the higher ups are going to help us out of this! BROCK I don't need a lawyer! LARS Brock, if you want to fight this, you need me. I've contacted this Joyce character, and apparently she has very concrete evidence against you. Luckily I've been able to get into contact with some character witnesses that should be able to help... BROCK I told you! I don't need a lawyer! I'm going to represent myself in court! LARS That's a foolish mistake. BROCK It may very well be, but at least then I can put that I was a lawyer on my resume! LARS That's not how that works. BROCK Really? Dammit. Fine, you can defend me. LARS Good. Now I'm going to need to know if the plaintiff, Gladys, contacted you in any way before the lawsuit came to light. BROCK Nope! We haven't heard a peep from her since I almost had sex with her at that museum gala! LARS Oh... LARS (T.H.) I've defended crooks, murderers, and people that let their Pokémon poop on other people's lawns without any moral quandaries, but I'm feeling kind of iffy defending this Brock character. LIAM Well... she may have said some stuff to me. BROCK What?! LARS Do go on. LIAM Um... when I went into her office, I may have written something on her desk... and she may have found it. BROCK Why the hell would you write something on her desk?! LIAM I dunno... it's like when a Growlithe pisses on your carpet to mark its territory, I guess. And I wanted to add insult to injury by defacing her property too. LARS Well, this doesn't leave us well off. I didn't know she had such solid evidence. BROCK Dammit Liam! I bet we're going to lose this case because of you! LARS Calm down. Have faith in our witnesses. If we can woo the jury, we'll be set. Anyway, I'm going to return back to the office. I'll see you two characters tomorrow at the courthouse. LARS leaves the office. BROCK Liam, this is all your fault! I can't believe you did this! LIAM I'm sorry, sir. BROCK First that ***** scares off Roxanne, and now this! I can't believe it! Why is life sucking so much?! LIAM Chin up, sir! Lars seemed to think that we can do well in the trial tomorrow. BROCK As if! We're screwed! So utterly screwed! BROCK storms into his office as LIAM sighs. LIAM (T.H.) Well, at least I got off better than Elizabeth did. INT. COURTROOM LOBBY BROCK and LIAM are waiting in chairs, dressed up in suits. LARS enters. LARS Well, are you ready for this? BROCK No. LARS (T.H.) Clients tend to be nervous right before the trial begins. They have reason to be, too. Half the time I show up hung over to these trials. LARS Don't worry. I don't think that Joyce is going to call you as a witness. I'm certainly not calling you as a witness either, so you just have to sit nicely and look sympathetic to the jury. BROCK Will do! LIAM What about me? LARS I haven't heard much about you. There's been talk of a Regis character, though. LIAM That's me... LARS Why would you have two names? No wonder you got into this mess. INT. COURTROOM BROCK, LIAM, and LARS enter the courtroom and take their seats at the defendant's bench. GLADYS and JOYCE notice them and walk over. GLADYS Ha! Today is finally the day I get to ruin you, Brock! JOYCE I bet you didn't know I was a lawyer, right? JOYCE laughs. JOYCE (T.H.) I hope whoever is watching this doesn't assume I'm just some unemployed layabout until they finally watch the trial. LARS Don't reply to them. They're trying to goad you into a response. BROCK Well it's working! I'm in a ****** mood, Gladys. The last thing I needed was this ******** lawsuit! You aren't going to see a penny out of me, and then you're going to rot in jail! LARS The judge can't make her go to jail, you know. BROCK I don't care! I'll make a citizen's arrest if I have to! LARS sighs. JOYCE Someone is angry! This should be fun! GLADYS Remember, Joyce, you have a job to do. GLADYS (T.H.) How come you're still filming? Are cameras even around in the courtroom? GLADYS and JOYCE return to their seats as the BAILIFF enters the room. BAILIFF All rise for the honorable Judge Reinhold. As the courtroom audience rises, REINHOLD enters the courtroom and takes his seat. REINHOLD Order in the court! Some large fries, please! BAILIFF (T.H.) I have told the judge many times to not quit his day job. The courtroom audience sits downs as REINHOLD begins talking again. REINHOLD Okay, so we have the case of Gladys v. Brock today. I see we have a lovely jury. Who is our head juror today? HARRIET rises from the jury bench. HARRIET Hello, your honor. BROCK Wait a minute, I know Harriet! How can she be a juror? HARRIET Do I know you? BROCK I'm Brock! I gave you those fitness lessons! HARRIET Doesn't ring a bell. JOYCE Harriet suffers from advanced age. I doubt she has any recollection of you or me. REINHOLD Well, can we get this thing started already? My bowling league is meeting today and I don't want to be late. The last person to show up always has to buy pizza and I'm not made of money. BROCK (T.H.) The courts in Pewter City use an odd system. Because of the number of petty lawsuits that keep popping up, all trials can only last one day. I'm partly to blame; I once sued a man for looking at me funny. REINHOLD So can we hear from the plaintiff now? JOYCE Of course. JOYCE gets up and talks to the jury. JOYCE People of the jury, the man you see before you is a very bad man. REINHOLD Hey! I'm going to hold you in contempt of court! REINHOLD (T.H.) I like threatening to hold people in contempt of court. I've never actually made good on my threats, but still, it shows them that I have the power! JOYCE I'm talking about Brock, your honor. He ruined my client's reputation by manipulating a poor, young man. LIAM I resent that! Once my exercise tapes become a hit, I won't be poor anymore! JOYCE Can everyone stop interrupting my opening statement? REINHOLD Yeah, we get it, Brock is bad. You're done. Can the defense get up here? JOYCE sits down as LARS gets up. LARS Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the plaintiff is a big, fat liar. Brock is a good man. He always stops for traffic lights... except when he's in a rush. He pays his taxes early... except for when he forgets. And he has never murdered anyone! Would a man like that be guilty? Absolutely not! LARS sits down. BROCK Thank you. That was very flattering. REINHOLD Okay, so the plaintiff has evidence or a witness or something, right? JOYCE We have both! JOYCE pulls out a stack of photographs and starts passing them out. JOYCE Exhibit A! As you can see, Liam wrote on Gladys's desk! He must have wrote that when Brock forced him to steal from her office. LARS Objection! You have no way to prove that Liam wrote that in the office at that time, or that the Liam that wrote that is the same Liam that sits before us today! JOYCE Don't sustain that objection, your honor! REINHOLD What? Hold on, I'm looking at this picture. It's great! What kind of camera did you take it with? Is this glossy print? JOYCE Whatever. I have a witness that will prove that Liam WAS in the office at the time. I call the Editor in Chief of the Pewter City Gazette to the stand! The EDITOR IN CHIEF walks up to the stand. The BAILIFF holds a copy of the Book of Arceus up to him. BAILIFF Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you Arceus? EDITOR IN CHIEF Um... I thought we discussed this earlier. I wasn't going to swear on the Book of Arceus. BAILIFF Oh, sorry. Hold on. The BAILIFF puts down the Book of Arceus and holds up a copy of the Pewter City Gazette. The EDITOR IN CHIEF places his hand on the paper. BAILIFF JOYCE approaches the witness stand as the EDITOR IN CHIEF takes his seat.Do you swear the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you... um... yourself, I guess? EDITOR IN CHIEF I do. BAILIFF (T.H.) I hate when witnesses want to swear on stuff other than the Book of Arceus. Just deal with it. We don't have "one nation under Arceus" in our Pledge of Allegiance just so you can swear on a stack of your own newspapers! JOYCE Mr. Editor, let me ask you a question. On the day Gladys claims that a tape from her office was stolen, did you get any visitors? EDITOR IN CHIEF Yes! There was a boy named Regis! He accused Gladys of being a corrupt journalist! JOYCE And what did this Regis boy look like? EDITOR IN CHIEF Why, there he is, right in front of us! The EDITOR IN CHIEF points to LIAM. This causes an uproar in the courtroom. JOYCE shouts over the commotion. JOYCE As we can see, Liam was in the Pewter City Gazette offices on the day the tape was stolen! Not only did Brock have him steal, he had him defame my client as well. BROCK No I didn't! REINHOLD ORDER! REINHOLD bangs his gavel until the courtroom becomes quiet. REINHOLD Brock, can you prove you didn't have the boy commit those crimes? BROCK Of course I can! Didn't you hear all those nice things my lawyer said about me? Would a guy like that commit any crimes? REINHOLD Well, if the defendant has nothing else to say, I'm willing to let the jury make its decision right now. The faster this is over, the faster I get to my bowling league. LARS Hold on! We still have a witness to call! JOYCE Do you really think a character witness will save you? I've established quite well that Brock is a terrible person. LARS I don't care! I call Merv to the stand! MERV (T.H.) When I heard I was going to be a witness in a trial, I got really excited! My trophy wife loves all those law shows, so being a real life witness will surely win her back! MERV walks up to the witness stand and the BAILIFF holds the Book of Arceus up to him. BAILIFF Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you Arceus? MERV Yeah, sure, I just need to be off the witness stand by three. LARS approaches the stand as MERV sits down. LARS Merv, let me ask you something. Is Brock a good guy? LARS (T.H.) What I do with character witnesses is ask them questions that will receive a positive answer about the defendant, and then... uh... that's it. MERV Brock is a great guy! Not a lot of people like me. My ex wife doesn't like me. My ex trophy wife that I left my ex wife for doesn't like me. But Brock? Brock's a stand up guy. I attended a fitness program he ran. He was a great teacher, and the program price was very affordable. JOYCE Objection! I was there! That entire program was a ripoff and a scam! MERV How did I become so much more fit then? REINHOLD Order! Lars, continue. LARS Thank you. Now then, do you have anything else to say, Merv? MERV Actually, I have a question. You lawyers were saying earlier that Liam is also some Regis guy. How can that be? LARS Apparently Liam used the name Regis when he allegedly entered the Pewter City Gazette offices. MERV There's no way that they're the same person! I visited the Pewter City Gym one time, and some guy named Regis was there! He was a real jerk! That couldn't have been Liam! He must have an evil doppelganger or something! LARS So you're saying that Liam and this Regis character can't be the same person? MERV Exactly! The courtroom breaks into an uproar. LARS Jurors, you heard it with your own ears! Liam and Regis are not the same person, which means there is no way to prove that Liam was at the Pewter City Gazette offices on the day Gladys lost her tape! GLADYS No way! I happened to meet "Regis" at the Pewter City Gym as well, and it was definitely just Liam putting on a tough guy act! REINHOLD bangs his gavel. REINHOLD ORDER! Witness, are you sure Liam and Regis are two different people? MERV They have to be! Either that, or he has a split personality! LARS I'd like to request Liam's medical records be brought here immediately! That will prove without a doubt that Liam is not Regis! GLADYS Dammit, Joyce! How is this happening? JOYCE I didn't realize that their witness would be so stupid! The BAILIFF heads out to retrieve the medical records. LARS Once the bailiff returns, we'll have all the evidence we need to get you off the hook, Brock! BROCK That's good. BROCK (T.H.) I'm really bored. I can't even remember the last time I talked to the camera like this. The BAILIFF returns with the medical records and distributed copies to the courtroom audience. LARS As you can see, Liam is mentally healthy! There's no way he has split personality disorder, therefore, he is not Regis, and he did not break into Gladys's office on the day her tape recording went missing! REINHOLD Well, I think that's all we have to see. Jury, it's time to deliberate! INT. COURTROOM LOBBY BROCK, LIAM, and LARS are discussing the trial. LARS Well, it looks like we've got this in the bag! LIAM When we win, I want to celebrate with some ice cream! BROCK Sorry, but I don't have any coupons for ice cream, Liam. The BAILIFF walks into the lobby. BAILIFF The jury has made its decision. Time to go back in there. LARS Ready to hear the good news? LIAM I was until I heard there wasn't going to be any ice cream. INT. COURTROOM Everyone has taken their seats except for REINHOLD, who walks out of his chamber wearing a bowling shirt instead of his judge's robes. REINHOLD Sorry, everyone, but I really have to get to my bowling league after this trial! REINHOLD takes his seat. REINHOLD So anyway, jurists, what decision have you come to? HARRIET rises. HARRIET We find the defendant, Brock, not guilty! HARRIET sits back down as BROCK gets up to do a little dance. BROCK GLADYS sighs, but then she looks at the camera.Haha! In your face, Gladys! GLADYS I can't believe this! You're such a disgrace to Pewter City! You deserved to lose this lawsuit and get fired from your job as gym leader! LARS Fired? He seems a bit air headed, but not that bad. GLADYS You should have been there when I interviewed him! He's the most incompetent gym leader out there! He goes through excessive lengths to avoid battling people! I'm pretty sure he even faked his death! Joyce, is there anything we can do to stop this? JOYCE Argh... the jury made the decision. We're finished. REINHOLD Well then, Brock is not guilty, and court is adjourned. Now if you'll excuse me, I got to go bowling! GLADYS Wait! That camera has been filming Brock at least since I first interviewed him! Why didn't we think of those before? Evidence of his crimes have to be on there! REINHOLD Sorry, but he was already declared not guilty, and we have double jeopardy here and all that. So goodbye! REINHOLD rushes out of the courtroom as GLADYS approaches BROCK. BROCK Well, unfortunately for you, my defense was rock solid! GLADYS slaps BROCK. GLADYS You idiot! You can only continue this charade for so long until everything collapses around you! I hope you burn in hell! LARS I'm sorry, miss, but do you have any proof of these accusations? GLADYS It's like I said earlier: it's all in that camera. I'm sure its recorded plenty of Brock's blunders. Once that footage gets out, he'll be revealed for the sham he is! With that, GLADYS storms off, JOYCE chasing after her. GLADYS (T.H.) Stop filming me! Haven't you realized by now I'm sick of being on your stupid little show? And I'm never prepared! I didn't even put my good makeup on today! LARS Hmm... how much has been recorded, Brock? BROCK Oh, there's so much recorded! My interview with Gladys, my fitness program scam, faking my death... LARS Wow, that sounds like a lot. LARS (T.H.) So I've decided I'm going to take these tapes back with me to the Indigo Plateau. Whatever shenanigans have been going on at Pewter City, the League needs to know about. Especially if there are any potential lawsuits on our hands. I really don't want to defend Brock again. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK and LIAM walk into the gym. LIAM Sir, you did a great job out there today! BROCK I know! Lars helped out too, but I did most of the legwork. BROCK (T.H.) Lars told me not to, but I'm going to put "lawyer" on all my future resumes anyway. LIAM So what do we do now, sir? BROCK Eh... I don't know... BROCK puts his hands in his pockets, lost, but then seems surprised. BROCK Wait! I have something in my pockets! I hope it's money! BROCK pulls something out of his pockets, but it's not money. Instead, it is a coupon. LIAM There it is! The missing coupon! But... how'd it get into those pants? BROCK (T.H.) I don't really have a system for storing paper, so I tend to just stuff coupons and stuff in whatever pants I have. The only reason I didn't check my dress pants in the first place is because usually I only store coupons that give me fifty dollars or more off in them! BROCK That's not important! It looks like we can go out to dinner now after all! I still wish it was money in my pocket, though. LIAM Yay! I get a free meal! BROCK Actually, we're going to split the bill. LIAM Yay! I'm going to split the bill! BROCK Let's go already! If we get there before five we only have to pay lunch menu prices! LIAM Sounds, good, sir! BROCK and LIAM exit the gym. |
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Another fine chapter there. Haha, Gladys should have thought of using the show’s camera as evidence, so it sucks that she didn’t. And yay for the return of Harriet and Merv! It pays to have stupid people as witnesses, sometimes. :P Looking forward to what happens next! |
Episode 11: The Inspection INT. CONFERENCE ROOM Sitting in the room are LORELEI, a bespectacled woman with her hair tied up, BRUNO, a buff man wearing nothing except baggy pants, AGATHA, an elderly woman wearing an old fashioned dress, and LANCE, a fiery haired man wearing a cape. The room is dark, except for a TV at the end of the room, currently playing the scene of BROCK faking his death. LANCE picks up the remote and pauses the video. LANCE BRUNO, LORELEI, and AGATHA nod.Well, what do we all think? LORELEI I always thought Brock was kind of dumb, but I didn't realize he was this incompetent. LORELEI (TALKING HEAD) I'm in charge of all public relations for the Pokémon League. Anyway, a while ago, I was approached by a production company that wanted to do an eight part series on all the Kanto gym leaders. I thought that was fine, so I approved it. After one day of filming down in Pewter City, they call me up and say that they're going to need to stay in Pewter for a bit longer because apparently they were getting great footage. Now I understand. AGATHA I agree with Lorelei. Why did we hire him in the first place? BRUNO Er... he may have been my cousin. AGATHA Nepotism?! Dammit, Bruno! LANCE Calm down, Agatha. If I recall correctly, the old leader had left, and no one else wanted the position in Pewter City. He was literally the only person who would take the job. AGATHA Don't tell me to calm down, Lance! Why didn't we properly vet him? BRUNO Why weren't you so worried about this when he was first hired?! BRUNO (T.H.) Agatha is just trying to get revenge on Brock for tackling her at the Pokémon League barbecue. LANCE Please, calm down! Let's not worry about what we didn't do in the past; focus on what we're going to do now. Do we remove Brock from his position now? BRUNO And replace him with who? LANCE Er... LORELEI To be honest, I'm still a bit weary of this video. It was filmed as a documentary meant to entertain. How do we know that this wasn't edited to hell and back in order to make Brock look like an idiot? AGATHA So you want him to keep his job? LORELEI Don't jump to conclusions. What I'm suggesting is that we send an inspector to the Pewter City Gym. If Brock has just been made to look like a fool, the inspector will tell us that, and if Brock really is a fool, the inspector would also tell us that. LANCE Well, this sounds like the best option to me. Can we all agree? LANCE INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENAI'll send the inspector right away. BROCK and LIAM are talking. BROCK Things look like they're really turning around! Even though all that crap with Roxanne happened, I managed to beat that trial! I feel unstoppable! LIAM I bet that if a challenger walked into the gym right now, you could beat him! BROCK Don't go that far. But still, I feel as if I'm on top of the world! The office phone rings. BROCK Oh my! You know what? I bet that's someone telling me that I won one of those contests we entered a while back! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK and LIAM rush into the office, and BROCK grabs the phone. BROCK Hello! Did I win? LANCE (VOICE ONLY) Brock? Hey, it's Lance. BROCK Oh. To what do I owe this call? LANCE (V.O.) Nothing major. Just thought I'd give you a heads up that a Pokémon League inspector should be dropping by in a few hours. BROCK Why?! LANCE (V.O.) Oh, it's just a standard inspection. Don't worry about it! BROCK I'm not worried! LANCE (V.O.) Ah, good. Have a pleasant day then. LANCE ends the call. BROCK drops the phone onto the floor. LIAM Sir, are you okay? BROCK I'm finished! LIAM What are you talking about?! BROCK And I was doing so well, too! I got rid of Elizabeth, I beat that trial, but none of it matters anymore! LIAM Calm down, sir! BROCK No! This is the end! The Pokémon League finally got wise to my game! That inspector is going to fail me, and then I'm going to get the boot from the gym! LIAM What do you mean? You're a great gym leader, sir! BROCK No, I'm not. BROCK (T.H.) I used to think I was hot ****. Ever since that reporter came, though, I've felt terrible. I tried ignoring it, but reflecting on everything that had happened since, I noticed I made a lot of terrible decisions: faking my death, my outburst at the ribbon cutting, my argument with Roark at the convention. I guess it took someone else realizing that I'm a horrible gym leader for myself to realize that I'm a horrible gym leader. BROCK Liam, get out of here. I need to be alone. LIAM But what about the inspector?! BROCK gets up and pushes LIAM out the door. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM is pacing back and forth. LIAM (T.H.) Brock has been locked up in his office for about an hour now. I don't know when the inspector is coming, but right now, things are looking grim. The gym is terribly dirty, and there's absolutely nothing going on! LIAM goes to office wall and bangs on it. LIAM Get out here, sir! I'm going to need your help to prepare for the inspector! BROCK (V.O.) What's the point? It won't make a difference anyway! LIAM We can do this, sir! You just have to come out of that office, and then we can prepare to really impress that inspector! LIAM does not get a reply. LIAM tries to open the office door, but it is locked. LIAM Ugh. How the heck am I going to prepare the gym for an inspection without Brock's help? EXT. MANOR LIAM rings the manor doorbell. The door opens to reveal ELIZABETH, standing in her pajamas. ELIZABETH ELIZABETH motions for LIAM to enter the manor.Oh dear, the cameras are here! Why didn't you tell me? I'm not prepared at all! My hair is all frizzy! People can't see me like this! LIAM There's a problem at the gym! ELIZABETH I know that. Brock rejected me. LIAM No, a real problem. ELIZABETH What is it? LIAM An inspector is coming to the gym! If we don't pass, the Pewter City Gym is finished! ELIZABETH Hmm... that wouldn't be good for my aspirations of stardom. Fine, come in. INT. MANOR LIVING ROOM ELIZABETH and LIAM walk into the living room. They both take a seat on different couches. ELIZABETH So this is my place. I bought it with all my lottery money. It's nice. LIAM Don't be modest. It doesn't suit you. ELIZABETH Ha! I suppose you're right! Look at this place! It's great! ELIZABETH points to a gigantic statue of herself a way off in the room. ELIZABETH I had that built on commission. I wanted it done in a day and it WAS done in a day. LIAM Exactly how much money did you win in the lottery? ELIZABETH A lot. ELIZABETH (T.H.) Yes, I had my lottery money, but then I took half of it and used it to short sell a bunch of Pewter City Gym stocks. Best idea I ever had. ELIZABETH Anyway, what do you want? You said there was some sort of problem with an inspector... LIAM An inspector is coming and Brock is depressed and there is no way the gym can be ready in time and I'm out of breath! ELIZABETH Hm... I'm assuming that if Brock fails the inspection, he will be fired, correct? LIAM Correct! ELIZABETH Ugh. We can't have that now, can we? LIAM We can't! ELIZABETH So what do we do? LIAM We do! ELIZABETH What? LIAM Er... never mind. I got caught up in the moment. But anyway, if you were to help out, and Brock didn't fail, he would really appreciate it. ELIZABETH Good. I'm tired of being a bit player in this documentary. I want to be second only to Brock! LIAM But wait... that's me! I'm second only to Brock right now! ELIZABETH Oh, that's why you're funny, Liam. LIAM (T.H.) Maybe coming here was a bad idea... LIAM Why do you care so much about this anyway? You already won the lottery. Why not just use your money to make you famous? ELIZABETH I don't want to be famous just for being rich like some stupid heiress, Liam. If I'm going to be famous, I want to go about it the right way. I want the public to love me because of my broadcasted antics with Brock, not because of my money. LIAM Either way, you're conceited. ELIZABETH So be it. Can we get over to the gym now? I want Brock to fall in love with me already. LIAM Yes, but you can't draw attention to yourself. Brock is still pretty pissed off about what happened with Roxanne, so if he knew you were helping me before it happened, he would really flip out. ELIZABETH Fine, I'll put up with your little charade for now. Let's go. INT. CAR The Pokémon League inspector, GARTH, is driving in his car to the Pewter City Gym. GARTH (T.H.) Hello, I'm Garth, and I'm the inspector for the Pokémon League. Do I like my job? Eh, it's okay. I don't really get called into action very much. The last time I was needed at a gym was due to a complaint at the Vermilion City Gym. I got a tip off that Lt. Surge was expressing gross misconduct. Turned out he was just picking his nose. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM and ELIZABETH walk into the gym. ELIZABETH So what needs to be done? LIAM Well, the entire gym needs to be cleaned. That's usually my job, but I kind of gave it up after I started my whole squatting phase. ELIZABETH That can be done; we'll just need to hire some homeless people for an hour. What else? LIAM According to the Pokémon League handbook, activities such as Pokémon battles should take place at the gym. ELIZABETH We know there's an Articuno's chance in hell of that actually happening, so what else can we do? LIAM Well, the gym leader is supposed to promote the local community as a whole... ELIZABETH Okay then! We'll hold a big fundraiser tonight for the museum. I'll call the local press so they can make an announcement. ELIZABETH whips out her cellphone. ELIZABETH Liam, go over to the museum and tell the curator we're holding the event. Then make some fliers and hand them out to anyone you see. I'll take care of the cleaning. LIAM Yes, ma'am! LIAM (T.H.) It's almost like she's running the gym... INT. PEWTER CITY MUSEUM LOBBY LIAM enters the museum to find MAGNUS milling around. LIAM Magnus... MAGNUS Oh, Liam my boy! I'm sure glad you recovered from that pretty grim beating the Kabuto gave you! We were all so worried! MAGNUS (T.H.) Was I personally worried for him? No. But quite frankly, it's a liability for the museum to have people getting hurt here. LIAM I'm doing fine. I was surprised Madeline didn't visit me, though. MAGNUS Oh, she can just be a little shy sometimes. But what brings you here? Did you want to check out the new exhibit we have on Aerodactyl urine? LIAM No... I just came to tell you that we're holding a big fundraiser for the museum at the gym. LIAM (T.H.) Dammit, there's a new exhibit about Aerodactyl urine?! Why did that inspection have to be today?! MAGNUS Oh really?! That's so generous! I'll be sure to tell everyone I know, and don't be surprised if I make an appearance! LIAM Sounds good. Be sure to hype it up! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA ELIZABETH is pacing around the gym, talking on her cellphone, as a large group of homeless people, led by CLIFF, are cleaning the gym. ELIZABETH So we're having a fundraiser at the gym tonight for the Pewter City Museum. Can we get on the news? DIRK (V.O.) I suppose I can give you a spot. It's been a slow news day. The most newsworthy thing that happened today was that a plane landed safely. CLIFF Hey boss, can we all use the bathroom here? ELIZABETH For the last time, Cliff, no! DIRK (V.O.) What was that? ELIZABETH Just talking to someone else. But thank you so much, Dirk! I'll tell everyone I know to watch GNN today! DIRK (V.O.) Okay. You'll see my on the TV tonight. Bye. ELIZABETH closes her phone. CLIFF Now why can't we use the bathroom? My buddies and I haven't been squatted a loaf on a toilet seat in ages! ELIZABETH Squat a loaf... what? Who calls it that? CLIFF I do! ELIZABETH Well not today! Finish up cleaning and get out of here! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK is sitting at his desk in a daze, watching TV. BROCK (T.H.) I've been watching a lot of TV lately. Did you know there was a channel that tells you what channels tell you what's on the other channels? BROCK is flipping through channels when he hits GNN. DIRK (T.V.) Good afternoon, everyone. We here at GNN have an announcement to make for the Pewter City Area. Tonight there will be- BROCK changes the channel. BROCK (T.H.) Boring! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM walks into the gym. LIAM Wow, this place looks amazing! ELIZABETH If you have enough homeless people, anything is possible. So what next? LIAM Well, we can set up some gambling games where all the proceeds go to charity, and give a prize to whoever wins the most money. ELIZABETH Prize, got it. What else? LIAM If we charge people at the door we can give them some sort of meal. ELIZABETH I'll just get some fast food and put it on fancy silverware. No one will notice. LIAM That works. LIAM (T.H.) We may actually be able to pull this off. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE BROCK is sitting at his desk, still watching TV, but now eating a bag of chips too. SOAP ACTRESS (T.V.) Don't ever leave me! SOAP ACTOR (T.V.) I can't, because you used Mean Look on me! BROCK grabs a handful of chips and stuffs them into his mouth. BROCK (T.H.) This is gripping stuff. SOAP ACTRESS (T.V.) You stole my heart by using Thief! SOAP ACTOR (T.V.) I had to. I failed at killing your lover because I only used False Swipe. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The gym is now completely transformed. Gambling paraphernalia is set up on one side, while tables, chairs, and dining equipment, and food is set up on the other side. LIAM The place looks great. Brock will be proud. Sadly, you have to go now. We can't risk Brock seeing you anymore. ELIZABETH I understand. But thankfully, Brock will want me back in his life after this evening is a success! ELIZABETH waves goodbye to LIAM and walks out the door. LIAM (T.H.) Good thing she's gone. I had no intention of telling Brock about any of her help. I don't want her taking any of my credit! EXT. PEWTER CITY GYM GARTH parks his car in the gym parking lot and exits. GARTH (T.H.) Wow, lots of cars around here! I wonder what's going on? It's my job to find out, so I may as well go in! I just hope there's no nose picking involved. GARTH walks up to the gym door and enters. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA GARTH enters. GARTH Holy Miltank! The gym is packed with people gambling and eating. LIAM notices GARTH has arrived and runs over. LIAM Hello, you must be the inspector! I'm Liam, the gym assistant! GARTH I'm Garth. I must say, it's quite impressive what you've put on here! LIAM How about I take you around for a look? GARTH That would be great. Is the gym normally this clean? LIAM Normally? I'd call this a bad day! GARTH Wow, you must keep the gym pretty tidy. LIAM Absolutely I do, and that is not a lie at all! LIAM and GARTH walk over to a blackjack table. JEFF, MERV, and STEVE are all playing. LIAM As you can see, the vibrant Pewter City community has come out to gamble for charity. STEVE Charity?! You mean we don't get to keep our winnings?! STEVE (T.H.) It turns out the stockbroker business isn't doing so well anymore, so if anyone out there just wants to donate money to me, that would be great! MERV I'm just excited about that prize! My trophy wife was always complaining about the microwave, so if I returned with a new one, she'd surely take me back! JEFF I'm just happy to be playing blackjack. JEFF (T.H.) When Brock was playing, blackjack was a disaster. I don't mind playing blackjack in the gym as long as I don't see his face at the table. GARTH Gee whiz, people from all walks of life show up to support the gym! LIAM Yes, people support the gym all the time! I am not fibbing at all right now! LIAM and GARTH are walking over to the dining area when they are stopped by MAGNUS, with MADELINE in tow. MAGNUS Liam, this is great! I wish you could throw fundraisers for the museum more often! LIAM You know me, there are so many charities we have to support, it's hard to find time for them all. I'm not bending the truth right now! GARTH Golly, the Pewter Gym sure is charitable! MAGNUS Madeline sure is impressed with everything! LIAM looks at MADELINE, but she quickly turns away from him. MADELINE (T.H.) Usually when I take advantage of people, I never see them again, so when I heard I had to go to the Pewter City Gym tonight for a fundraiser, I was seriously considering attending in a disguise. LIAM Enjoy the rest of the night, Magnus! MAGNUS I'm sure I will! LIAM and GARTH walk over to the dining area, where ARTIE is currently eating. LIAM As you can see, we also provided food for everyone in attendance. ARTIE This hamburger is simply delectable! Though it does taste awfully similar to the hamburger you can purchase at the establishment just a bit down the road... LIAM That must be purely coincidental! What I said was not a false statement! LIAM (T.H.) I sure have been doing a lot of flat out lying tonight... GARTH What's that over there? GARTH points over to a TV with a couple of exercise mats in front of it, where HARRIET is currently doing squats. LIAM Oh, that? It's nothing, honestly! GARTH walks over to the TV, with LIAM chasing after him. GARTH examines the TV and sees LIAM is on it, guiding an exercise. LIAM (T.V.) LIAM walks over to the office door, with GARTH following him. LIAM knocks on the door.Good job on those four squats! For this next exercise, we're going to do five squats! That's one more squat than the last exercise! HARRIET I'm improving already! GARTH You put out exercise tapes as well? I didn't know that the Pewter City Gym was fighting obesity! LIAM Oh, those are just a side project of mine... GARTH Nonsense! You sure are devoted to this gym! But where's the man of the hour, Brock? LIAM I'll get him. LIAM Brock, the inspector is here! BROCK (V.O.) Fine. I guess I'll come out now... BROCK exits the office, his hair disheveled and his clothes covered with chip crumbs, and his jaw drops as he surveys the gym. BROCK I can't believe it... GARTH Brock, I have to say that this is a wonderful event that the Pewter City Gym is holding tonight! It's great to see gym leaders want to take an active part in the community! BROCK Oh... oh! Of course it is! I try my best. You know I once donated a rock to the Pewter City Museum? GARTH Well, I'm sure the amount of money you'll raise for the museum tonight will top that! BROCK Oh, this is for the museum? GARTH I beg your pardon? BROCK I said, "This is great for the museum!" GARTH It sure is! Now then, it was nice to meet both of you, but I've seen all I need to see here. I'll be going back home now. Enjoy the rest of the night! BROCK We sure will! GARTH goes through the rest of the crowd and makes his exit. BROCK How the hell did you pull this off, Liam? LIAM Hard work and determination? BROCK That's good enough for me! I can't believe it! I've dodged another bullet! I should have been more optimistic! LIAM And you should definitely not thank Elizabeth for any of this, because she did not help in any way whatsoever. BROCK That's fine with me; I hate that girl. Now then, I haven't used the bathroom all day. Excuse me for the moment. BROCK enters the bathroom and shouts. BROCK (OFF CAMERA) What the hell is a homeless guy doing in here?! CLIFF (OFF CAMERA) I'm just squatting a loaf! BROCK (T.H.) There are some days that you think are going to go bad, but they end up turning out really well. This was one of those days! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go play blackjack. I saw that one guy I played with earlier at the table! I'm sure he'll love to play cards with me again! LIAM (T.H.) I'm just happy all the work is over. I'm not even in the mood for squats right now. INT. CAR GARTH is in his car, driving back to the Pokémon League. GARTH (T.H.) I have to say, I was really impressed by what a saw at the Pewter City Gym! Good people, good times, good food, and it's all thanks to that Liam kid! He's really the heartbeat of that gym! How would it function without his ambition? It probably wouldn't! |
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Haha at the soap opera Brock was watching. Indeed, some intense stuff there. XD I have to say, I actually like that in this chapter Brock realizes all the horrible things he had done throughout the show. Sure, it took him 11 episodes to figure that out, but better late than never. *nods* Yay for Brock feeling better and everything turning out well in the end. Looking forward to the last two chapters! |
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Brock has realized how incompetent he is, but unfortunately, he prefers hiding in his office, eating chips, to actually going out and trying to be a good gym leader. I guess finding the homeless guy in the bathroom is karmic justice for that. XD And yes, only two more to go. :O |
Episode 12: Brown Nosing INT. CAR BROCK is driving in a rental car with LIAM in the passenger seat. BROCK (TALKING HEAD) So Liam and I are on the way to Indigo Plateau. The Elite Four has summoned us there to go over the results of the inspection. Quite honestly, I'm expecting an increase in funding. LIAM I don't get why we're driving there so early, then... BROCK (T.H.) You see, I'm going there so early because even though we both think the inspection went really well, there's nothing wrong with doing a bit of *** kissing beforehand. I'll just pay a visit to all the members of the Elite Four, and when they go over my inspection, they'll just remember how charming I was! LIAM Hey, can I turn the radio on, sir? BROCK Don't you dare! INT. HALLWAY BROCK and LIAM walk through the Pokémon League hallway and reach the office of LORELEI. BROCK (T.H.) So first off I'm going to take Lorelei out for lunch. I may be taking a big risk here, since I've never had much luck with the ladies, but I'm just brown nosing, so no pressure! BROCK knocks on the office door, and LORELEI walks out. LORELEI Hello? BROCK is stunned, as his eyes are fixed on her cleavage. BROCK Uh... LORELEI Close you mouth. That's how you catch bug type Pokémon. BROCK Uh... sorry! BROCK quickly shifts his gaze upward. LORELEI You're Brock, aren't you? That would explain why the camera's following you, at least. What do you want? We aren't having our meeting with you for a few more hours, and even so, we aren't having the meeting in my office. BROCK Oh, I thought Liam and I would just take you out for lunch! LORELEI I packed a sandwich on my way to work... but fine, I guess we can go out for lunch. LORELEI (T.H.) I'm not that big a fan of being filmed, especially when I'm eating. Why does everyone have to watch me chew? It's disgusting! INT. DINING ROOM BROCK, LIAM, and LORELEI have gone to a restaurant. A WAITER approaches there table. WAITER And what will we be having to eat this afternoon? BROCK glances at LORELEI. BROCK I'll have the breast... er... I mean chicken breast! LORELEI sighs. LORELEI (T.H.) The WAITER leaves.Yes, my boobs are big. Get over it. LIAM I'll have half of a grilled cheese sandwich! WAITER We don't offer half. You can only order the whole thing. LIAM But wouldn't it be cheaper? WAITER Nope. It would cost the same. LIAM Fine, I'll have the grilled cheese. LIAM (T.H.) Brock told me he that he wasn't going to pay for my meal, so I'm trying to be frugal. LORELEI I'll have the broccoli rabe. WAITER Okay. I will be back with your orders soon. LORELEI Liam, you put on quite the spectacular at the gym the other day, or at least I heard. BROCK Oh, the fundraiser was great! LORELEI I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Liam. BROCK Oh... LIAM Well, it was a lot of hard work, but I think it paid off. Everyone was really impressed! Even the inspector! BROCK So Lorelei, how about this weather we're having? It sure has been nice out. It's good weather to just go for a stroll in! LORELEI Is that all you can talk to me about? Just pointless small talk? BROCK Uh... what's your favorite color? LORELEI Blue. LORELEI takes a sip of her wine. LORELEI (T.H.) Where's the waiter? I'm going to need more of this. The WAITER has brought the food out. As BROCK, LIAM, and LORELEI eat, BROCK looks at a certain area of LORELEI. LORELEI You know, Brock, when you eat, you should try and keep your head up. BROCK Sorry! BROCK doesn't move his head. LORELEI That's wasn't a suggestion; that was an order. BROCK Oh... BROCK lifts his head up. LORELEI Look at that! You're eating like a non-perverted adult now! LIAM sees the WAITER and motions to him. LIAM Excuse me, but are there free refills on soft drinks? I nearly finished my soda. WAITER Sorry, sir, but we charge on refills. LIAM Oh, just get me a water then. That doesn't cost me anything, right? WAITER Right. The WAITER leaves. WAITER (T.H.) I have a bad feeling that kid isn't going to tip very well. BROCK is still struggling to have a conversation with LORELEI. BROCK Hey, so have you been watching "Kanto's Next Top Trainer"? I really want Leroy to win, but Tyrone seems pretty popular with the ladies. LORELEI I don't have time to watch TV, and if I did, I wouldn't waste my time watching reality garbage like that. LORELEI (T.H.) Yes, Brock is paying for my meal, but it really isn't worth it. This just proved there truly is no such thing as a free lunch. The WAITER comes out and brings two bills over to BROCK and LIAM. WAITER You said you wanted different bills, so here's one for the man and his lady- LORELEI We aren't a couple. WAITER And here's one for the boy. LIAM opens his bill, and mints fall out. LIAM Take these back! I don't want to pay for them! WAITER The mints are complimentary, sir. LIAM Oh, thank goodness! The WAITER leaves. LORELEI Well, I actually have work to do, so I'm going to leave now. You'll take care of the bill, right? BROCK Right. LORELEI gets up from the table and leaves. As soon as she's out of sight, BROCK gets up and leaves, leaving his bill unpaid. BROCK (T.H.) Dine and ditch! LIAM Hm... the waiter was okay. I guess I'll give him a five percent tip. LIAM gets his cash out, pays his bill, and leaves. WAITER (T.H.) Only fifty cents for a tip... I knew it! INT. HALLWAY BROCK (T.H.) So next up is Bruno. This dude is my cousin. He got me my job at the Pewter City Gym, and for that, I am eternally grateful. So I will be taking him out to watch an exhibition battle. BROCK knocks on the door to the office of BRUNO. BRUNO exits. BRUNO Brock?! What are you doing here, buddy? BROCK Oh you know, I was in the neighborhood, thought I'd show up early, say hi to all the Elite Four. BRUNO That's great, but you know, I'm really swamped with work right now. BROCK I got us tickets to that exhibition match today. BRUNO I guess I can go for a break, then. You do know that as a member of the Elite Four, I don't need to pay for tickets though, right? BROCK Dammit, I bought two tickets! What the hell am I going to do with this extra one? BROCK looks at LIAM for a moment. BROCK Liam, you go wait in the car. I'm going to try and scalp this ticket before the battle. LIAM Yes, sir. INT. INDIGO PLATEAU ARENA BROCK and BRUNO are sitting down, watching the battle. BROCK Hey, that one guy has an Onix! Kick his ***, Onix! BRUNO You do realize that the other trainer is using a Vileplume, which knows attacks that are super effective against Onix, and that Onix will probably lose this battle? I mean, you do know that, right? You know at least that much? BRUNO (T.H.) Sometimes I still try to validate my decision to make Brock a gym leader. BROCK Of course I know everything about Pokémon battles, cousin! I'm a gym leader! BROCK (T.H.) And I know that Onix is going to win. Rock types rule! BRUNO Anyway, I heard Liam put on an impressive program at the gym the other day. BROCK Well, Liam and I. Mostly I. It was a joint effort, but I was the jointest of that effort. BRUNO Jointest? Is that even a word? BROCK You know Shakespeare invented words? Well, so do I. BRUNO But you aren't Shakespeare! BROCK and BRUNO share a laugh. BROCK (T.H.) Bruno better watch it. I am just as inventive as Shakespeare! BRUNO But it's still good to know that someone is doing something at the Pewter City Gym. BROCK And that someone is me, obviously. Liam, too. But mostly me. BROCK turns his attention to the battle again. BROCK What?! Why'd he switch out Onix?! You can never go wrong with a rock type! BRUNO But now he's using Rapidash. He has the type advantage. BROCK But he doesn't have the cool advantage. Rock types for life! A BARKER starts moving down the aisle. BARKER Hot pretzels! Get your hot pretzels here! Get them while they're hot! Or you can wait until they cool! It doesn't matter to me! Hot pretzels here! BROCK Bruno, can you get me a hot pretzel? BRUNO Why can't you pay for one yourself? BROCK I just figured you can get them for free because you're a member of the Elite Four and all that... BRUNO Fine... One hot pretzel, please! BARKER Sure thing, Bruno, and it's on the house! The BARKER hands BRUNO a pretzel. BROCK grabs it. BROCK Yay! Yay! Yay! Thanks, Bruno! BRUNO (T.H.) Being with Brock is like babysitting a small child. INT. CAR LIAM is sitting in the car, singing along with the radio. LIAM And I'm here to remind you, of the Muk you left when you went away, it's not fair to deny me, of the cross-chop bruise that you gave to me, you, you, you oughta know! LIAM notices the camera. LIAM (T.H.) That totally isn't me singing! It's the radio! INT. INDIGO PLATEAU ARENA The battle is now over, and the crowd begins to leave. BROCK That was quite an enjoyable match! I'm pretty upset that trainer didn't use the awesome power of rock Pokémon, though. BRUNO He would have been at a disadvantage if he brought Onix out again! All of his opponent's Pokémon had a strength against rock types! BROCK Rock types have no weaknesses. BRUNO Grass, water, ground, fighting, steel. BROCK It's all in their head. Mind over matter! They can overcome their weaknesses if they think about it hard enough! BRUNO That's not how it works, Brock. BROCK Rock should be able to beat everything! I mean, if I hit you in the head with a rock in real life, you would die! The same should apply toPokémon. BRUNO Whatever. It was nice seeing you again, Brock, and I guess I'll see you soon, when we go over the inspection. BRUNO (T.H.) I am not looking forward to that. INT. HALLWAY BROCK and LIAM are now standing outside the office of AGATHA. BROCK You said you took care of plans for Agatha, right? LIAM Yes, sir, I did. BROCK Good! Er... what exactly are those plans again? LIAM Tea time, sir. BROCK Oh, so we're going to go to a cafe or something? LIAM No, sir. Agatha will be brewing the tea herself. BROCK Her... herself?! Liam, you know how I feel about old people preparing food and drink for me! LIAM Sir, if you want to look good in front of the Elite Four, you have to do this! It'll really make up for that time you tackled her! LIAM (T.H.) I should have known Brock wasn't going to take this well... BROCK Liam, this is a matter of life and death! I don't care if you want to gamble your own life away, but why did you have to offer up mine? LIAM This is for your own good, Brock! LIAM knocks on the door. BROCK Dammit! There's nowhere to hide! The door opens and AGATHA walks out. AGATHA Hello? Who is it? BROCK Her crippling eyesight prevents her from seeing us! Quick, Liam, let's get out of here! AGATHA I can see you. I just don't recognize you. LIAM This is Brock, and I'm his gym assistant, Liam. AGATHA Oh, Liam! I talked to you on the phone earlier. That's right. I recognize your voice. Well, come in, come in. AGATHA walks into the office. LIAM Sir, you have to go in now. BROCK I can't do it! I can't do it! LIAM Sir, I promise you that Agatha will not try to poison you. BROCK What if she doesn't try? What if she succeeds? LIAM She won't. Old people are... dimwitted anyway. LIAM (T.H.) I had to say something to get him to agree to go in. BROCK You're right. They're brains aren't what they used to be. I guess I'll go in. BROCK (T.H.) Listen, if I die in there, I want you to use this video as evidence in that murder. Give her the death penalty! INT. AGATHA'S OFFICE BROCK and LIAM take a seat on a couch in the office. AGATHA begins to heat water. AGATHA Liam, you must be a bright young man, holding such a great fundraiser for the Pewter City Museum. BROCK Why is everyone giving Liam credit for that? I'm the gym leader, you know! LIAM It was quite a hectic day, but everything went smoothly in the end. I even sold some copies of my exercise tape! AGATHA It's good to see youngsters take an active role in the community. Make sure to stay active, though. Don't end up as some old duff, just staying inside, fiddling around with your Pokédex. BROCK Liam is to young to be doing that, you disgusting old hag! LIAM I don't think that was a euphemism, sir. BROCK Oh, my apologies then, Agatha. AGATHA It's alright, I guess. I'm just happy you came. I heard you're actually going to try something I made this time? BROCK Listen, I was pretty sure those hot dogs were going to kill everyone! I wasn't willing to take that risk! I had to tackle you! AGATHA Luckily, that is in the past. Now we can just sit here like old friends and drink tea. AGATHA (T.H.) Ugh, I can't wait to just get this over with already. At least I'm getting a chance to see Brock suck up his pride. The water heated, AGATHA pours it into three teacups, and she pulls out a selection of teabags. AGATHA Is black cherry okay? LIAM I'm fine with that. BROCK I don't care. AGATHA begins to brew the tea. AGATHA I used to not use teabags, but it has become difficult in my old age. BROCK That must be a real shame. BROCK (T.H.) I don't care what has become difficult in her old age! You see, this is why young people are the best! We don't need people to help us wipe our asses when we go poop! AGATHA Take advantage of your youth, Liam. I can tell you this, you have a lot to look forward to in your future. BROCK And how would you know that? Are you some kind of witch? LIAM (T.H.) I was doing okay until Brock brought up the possibility of Agatha being a witch. Now I'm just afraid she's going to eat me. AGATHA I'm not a witch, just someone in the know. AGATHA finishes brewing the tea and gives cups to BROCK and LIAM. AGATHA Enjoy! AGATHA takes a sip. LIAM follows suit. LIAM This tea is excellent! AGATHA Black cherry is one of my favorites. Well, are you going to try some, Brock? BROCK Oh, you want me to drink it? AGATHA That's the idea. BROCK looks at the cup of tea. His hand begins to tremble. BROCK I don't know. I mean, I had a lot to eat and drink at lunch, and then I had that hot pretzel... it just seems like I consumed enough for now. AGATHA Nonsense! You can at least have a sip of tea! BROCK I guess I can... BROCK begins to lift the teacup to his mouth, his hand trembling more and more as he does so. Finally, it reaches his lips. BROCK Well... b-b-bottoms up! BROCK is about to drink the tea when... BROCK I can't do it! I can't! BROCK sends the teacup flying onto the ground, the tea spilling everywhere and the teacup smashed into a ton of tiny pieces. BROCK I can't do it! I just can't take the risk! AGATHA sighs. AGATHA That was a perfectly good teacup too, you know. AGATHA (T.H.) Really, it seems like every time I meet up with Brock, something of mine gets broken. First it was one of my bones, now my fine china. LIAM I'm sorry about that. AGATHA Don't worry about it, Liam. Some people just never change. AGATHA turns to BROCK. AGATHA You made this mess; you're going to clean it up. Go over to the janitorial closet and get yourself a mop. BROCK Yes, ma'am. INT. HALLWAY BROCK and LIAM leave the office. BROCK is exhausted from mopping the floor. BROCK That's the problem with old people! They think just because they had to do hard labor back in the olden days, we should have to do hard labor too! LIAM So, who's next? BROCK Just Lance. Then we've hit everyone. BROCK and LIAM arrive at the office of LANCE. BROCK knocks, and LANCE exits. LANCE has a very stern look on his face when he sees it's BROCK at the door, his arms crossed. LANCE says nothing. BROCK Uh... LANCE If you don't have anything to say, go away! BROCK Okay. BROCK quickly submits to LANCE and walks away. LANCE notices LIAM standing there. LANCE Oh, Liam. I heard how well that fundraiser at the gym went. Keep up the good work. LIAM Thank you, sir! LANCE slams the door shut. LANCE (T.H.) Listen, I don't have time to deal with clowns like him, and I certainly don't have time to deal with you clowns behind the camera. Now get the hell out of my office! INT. INDIGO PLATEAU LOBBY BROCK AND LIAM are pacing around when BRUNO greets them. BRUNO Ah, Brock and Liam. Follow me. We're ready for you. BRUNO leads BROCK and LIAM through the building until they reach a pair of double doors. They enter. INT. CONFERENCE ROOM LORELEI, AGATHA, and LANCE are already sitting down. BRUNO takes his place with the rest of the Elite Four, while BROCK and LIAM sit on the opposite side of the table. LANCE So we received the report from the inspector the other day. After taking a look through it, we settled on a decision. BRUNO It wasn't easy. AGATHA It was for me. LORELEI I had to read through a couple times to make sure what I was seeing was true. LANCE Yes, well, after careful deliberation, we are sorry to say, Brock, that as of now, you are hereby relieved of your duties as Pewter City Gym Leader. BROCK What?! How can that be?! The inspection went great! The inspector was so impressed! There must be something wrong! LANCE There is nothing wrong. We made our decision. BROCK jumps up from his seat. BROCK You can't do this! I did such a great job at that fundraiser! You can't call it anything but a success! LANCE I know. That's how we came to our second decision. Liam, you are no longer a lowly gym assistant. Congratulations, Gym Leader Liam. LIAM Seriously? I'm a gym leader now? LANCE Yes. Bruno has decided to visit sometime next week to help you transition. As soon as everything is running smoothly, the gym will be yours. LIAM I... I can't believe it. I mean... I've dreamed of this happening before, but... BROCK But what about me?! What happens to me?! AGATHA Nothing. You are no longer employed by the Pokémon League. BROCK goes over to the Elite Four and gets on his knees. BROCK You can't do this! Being gym leader is the only thing I have! Without it, my whole world collapses! BRUNO Don't worry, cousin. Now that you're unemployed, there's an endless amount of new opportunities that await you. BROCK NO! I'm finished! BROCK grabs on to the cape of LANCE. BROCK You can't fire me! YOU CAN'T! I need this job! I need it! I NEED IT! LANCE kicks BROCK off of his cape. LANCE Get off of me. You need to accept the fact that you are no longer a gym leader. Move on with your life. BROCK I can't do that! It is my life! AGATHA sighs. AGATHA Bruno, get him out of here. BRUNO gets up from his chair and picks up BROCK. BROCK shouts as BRUNO moves him to the door. BROCK You can't do this! I'll never forgive you! Let go of me! I swear I'll have my revenge! BRUNO throws BROCK out of the room. LIAM So... uh... what kind of health benefits do I get now? BROCK (T.H.) Well, **** on a stick. INT. LORELEI'S OFFICE LORELEI is working in her office when the WAITER from earlier enters. LORELEI LORELEI hands the money over and the WAITER leaves.What do you want? WAITER Well, you didn't pay your bill from earlier. I would have given it to the gentleman with you, but I have no idea where to find him. LORELEI Oh, he didn't pay? That's just great. LORELEI (T.H.) I'm not even going to bother tracking Brock down to pay me back. Lousy unemployed bum. |
My favorite parts have to be when he was with Lorelei and Agatha. Lorelei's breasts are indeed quite big, LOL. It's a good thing she appeared during the Orange Islands arc or else Brock will have a huge nosebleed. :P And oh my gosh, Brock's such a wimp for not drinking Agatha's tea, oi.
Hahahaha, poor Brock there at the end. That's what he gets for all the stuff he had done throughout this series. So Liam's going to be the new gym leader, huh? Hopefully he won't be like Brock and then Rock types have no weaknesses. :P Wee, close to the last chapter! |
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And if all goes well, final episode will be up tomorrow. |
Episode 13: Sycophant Search INT. OREBURGH CITY GYM ROARK walks into the gym. HEATHER is waiting for him. HEATHER Good morning, Roark! The gym is clean and ready for the day! ROARK Absolutely wonderful! Good job, Heather! By the way, did you hear the news? HEATHER What news? ROARK Brock was fired from his position as gym leader. It's such a shame. He was a great guy! HEATHER (TALKING HEAD) No he wasn't. HEATHER So wait, who's the new gym leader? ROARK Oh, his old gym assistant is! Liam! HEATHER So how come I work my *** off and get no reward for it, but that kid does nothing and gets promoted? ROARK I think he actually put on quite the fundraiser at the gym. At least, that's what I've heard. Good for him! HEATHER What's the point of even staying here, then? I have no hope for promotion if my superior is more competent than me! I quit! ROARK Well, if that's what you really want... go follow your dreams! HEATHER Really? You aren't going to complain about it? HEATHER (T.H.) What does the future hold for me? Applying to be the gym assistant at the Pewter City Gym. Then I'll just have to wait it out until Liam is fired, and I'll finally be a gym leader. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA LIAM and BRUNO are talking in the arena. BRUNO So you should know all the basics by now, I hope. LIAM Yes, sir! Training was really helpful. BRUNO Just one last thing: you're going to have to hire a gym assistant. LIAM Really? I get to have my own assistant?! BRUNO Well, yeah. You replaced Brock, someone needs to replace you. LIAM Wow! I don't even know where to start looking! BRUNO You'll probably just want to hire a sycophant. LIAM Sycophant? BRUNO You know, a yes man! Someone who will just agree with everything you say and obey all of your orders! BRUNO (T.H.) Actually, that may be bad advice. That's exactly how Brock got into his predicament. He needed someone to tell him "No"! LIAM Okay! I guess I'll put out a want ad or something. BRUNO Good. Now that you've finished training, I'll only be dropping by every week or so for the next couple of months. The transition period is crucial. If you can get through it successfully, you'll end up being a great gym leader. If you don't... you'll end up being the next Brock. LIAM Don't worry, sir! I'll give it my all! BRUNO That's the kind of enthusiasm I like to hear! Have a great day! LIAM You too, sir! BRUNO leaves the gym. BROCK (OFF CAMERA) Is it okay to come out now? BROCK peeks his head out of the office, making sure the coast is clear, and then tiptoes out. BROCK It's a good thing he'll be visiting less frequently now! Sneaking around is hard work! LIAM (T.H.) Brock... won't leave the gym. BROCK (T.H.) Yes, I have been living at the gym since I was fired. I mean, I lived at the gym before I was fired, too, so what's the big deal? LIAM (T.H.) I really need to get rid of him. LIAM He'll still be coming here, though. You can't keep this charade up forever! BROCK Don't worry about it! He's my cousin; he won't care! we're family! Can you clean the bathroom? I made it pretty nasty in there! LIAM Brock, I'm the gym leader now. You can't order me around. And anyway, you're the only one that uses the bathroom here! BROCK So that's how it is, Liam? After working together for so long, we're no longer friends? LIAM We're still friends, but we're no longer working together! You need to accept that fact, Brock! BROCK So will you clean the bathroom, friend? LIAM I have to go put up ads around town for the assistant position. You can clean it yourself. LIAM leaves to go to his office and print out ads. BROCK stands in the gym, bewildered. BROCK (T.H.) It's like he's bossing me around. What's up with that? INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM begins typing up the ad, but becomes distracted by the mess in the office. LIAM Brock, my office! BROCK enters. BROCK Don't you mean my office? LIAM What is this?! LIAM points to a stack of pizza boxes. BROCK Oh, that's the Leaning Tower of Pizza! For every pizza I order, I throw the box on top of the tower! LIAM Throw it out. BROCK You can't throw out the Leaning Tower of Pizza! It's a landmark! LIAM I'm not going to throw it out. It's not my mess. You throw it out! BROCK What part of "It's a landmark" did you not understand? LIAM This is my office now, Brock! I can't have your garbage all over the place! BROCK It's not garbage! LIAM goes over to the tower and starts throwing the pizza boxes at BROCK. LIAM How do you like it?! Is it garbage now?! BROCK That's vandalism! I'm going to report you! LIAM I'm going to report you for loitering at the gym you no longer work at! BROCK Fine, fine! BROCK picks up the stack of pizza boxes and walks out of the office. BROCK (T.H.) This is much too important to throw out. I'm just going to hide it in the bathroom. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA The next day, LIAM walks into the gym. BROCK is waiting for him. LIAM You're still here... BROCK I stayed up really late! Turns out I got hungry, so I ordered Chinese food! I hope you like the smell of reheated General Tso's chicken in the morning! LIAM Listen, Brock, the potential assistants should be coming in today for interviews. I need you to be on your best behavior. Actually, do you know the expression "children should be seen, not heard"? BROCK Of course I do! I taught you that expression! You didn't follow it very well... LIAM For today, I would prefer if you were neither seen nor heard. BROCK This is my domain! I must survey the land! You can't tell a Tauros to not roam the plains! That would be Pokémon cruelty! LIAM It's a good thing you're not a Pokémon, then. LIAM walks away into his office. LIAM (O.C.) Ew, what's this smell?! BROCK You don't like it? INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM is on the phone. LIAM Hello, Roxanne! It's Liam! If you remember, I used to be Brock's gym assistant! Guess what? Now I'm the gym leader! There's a bit of a problem, though. Brock is moping around the gym all day, and I really need him to move on. Is there any way you could give him another chance? He wasn't actually seeing that other girl, you know! He actually despises her now, after she lied to you! So please, PLEASE, call back! Thank you! LIAM hangs up the phone. LIAM (T.H.) I've been trying to get in contact with Roxanne for awhile now. She won't answer any of my calls. It's getting annoying. I don't know how to solve this Brock situation otherwise! BROCK walks into the office. LIAM seems annoyed. LIAM What is it, Brock? I got a busy schedule today. BROCK Have you seen my toothbrush? LIAM Your toothbrush? BROCK I also use it to comb my hair, too, but it's technically a toothbrush. LIAM You know what, don't just find your toothbrush. Find all of your stuff, gather it up into a box, and move out. BROCK C'mon, Liam! You know I don't want to live in the bathroom! BROCK (T.H.) I did live in a bathroom for a week one time when I went abroad. My host family in Isshu did not like me very much. LIAM Not out of the office! Out of the gym! BROCK You have been quite the prankster lately, Liam. First you made me get rid of the Leaning Tower of Pizza, now you want me to move out? It's so silly of you! You need to take your new job more seriously. LIAM I am, Brock, and to do that, I can't have you hanging around all day interfering in my work! BROCK Fine! I'll gather all my stuff up! BROCK (T.H.) I have no intention of moving out. I guess I'll just have to suck up my pride and move into the bathroom after all. At least that way I'll have a scenic view of the Leaning Tower of Pizza. BROCK begins searching through the office for his belongings. He finds an earpiece. BROCK Hey, remember this? We used this when you infiltrated the Pewter City Gazette! Boy, you can't beat those memories! LIAM And doing that nearly got us into a lot of trouble. I'll pass on remembering that. Next, BROCK finds the "Let's Chuck Tonight, Baby!" videotape. BROCK This is what made me the strong man I am today. LIAM My exercise tapes are better. BROCK Please, all you care about are squats. LIAM (T.H.) Just because all I care about are squats doesn't mean I don't care about a wide variety of squatting techniques! BROCK then grabs a pickax. BROCK Without this, we would have never found that cool rock! LIAM And you would have never embarrassed yourself at that ribbon cutting for the Pewter City Museum. We didn't even use pickaxes to find that rock, anyway! BROCK Someone has a sharp tongue today... BROCK comes across a bunch of Boulder Badges. BROCK And look at all these! I haven't given one of these out in ages! That's just how good I am! LIAM What about that one challenger? Hal, wasn't it? He pretty much wiped the floor with you. HAL (T.H.) So how did my Pokémon training journey go? Well, I kind of gave up. You see, I heard the calling. Now, I'm doing Arceus's work. Can you believe those barbarians in Isshu don't believe in Arceus?! And the family that was hosting me made me sleep in the bathroom! BROCK That doesn't count! I was having an off day! But anyway, I found a bunch of junk, now! My hotel key card from when I went to the convention, a bunch of losing scratch off lottery tickets from that time I got obsessed with gambling... doesn't all of this remind you of good times, Liam? LIAM You aren't going to change my mind, Brock! INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA It is now time for the interviews. LIAM walks out of his office to see MERV, DALLAS, and HEATHER milling around as BROCK tries to make awkward conversation with all of them. BROCK Hey, have you ever lived in a bathroom before? HEATHER No... HEATHER (T.H.) What the hell is he still doing here? Wasn't he fired? And all of his questions are bringing up bad memories of my trip to Isshu! LIAM Uh... Dallas, I'll interview you first. DALLAS That's alright with me, pardner! LIAM and DALLAS walk into the office. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM and DALLAS sit down. DALLAS puts his feet on the desk. DALLAS I tell ya', I was shocked when I heard ya' scrawny little kid was going to be the new gym leader. LIAM Well, here I am: the new gym leader. Anyway, what kind of qualifications do you have to be gym assistant? DALLAS For one thing, I'm the best of the west! LIAM The best of the... west? DALLAS Ya' heard me right! LIAM Is that a real thing? DALLAS It sure is! LIAM Do you have a certificate proving that you're the best of the west? Can your references confirm it? DALLAS Course they can! LIAM On the resume you sent me, you listed your two references as "Houston" and "San Antonio", and for contact information you just put "See me". Can you explain what that's all about? DALLAS Of course! Those are my fists! LIAM And I think I've heard enough. Have a good day, Dallas. DALLAS angrily gets up and leaves the office. DALLAS (T.H.) I tell ya' this, if I don't get that job, he'll be hearing from Houston and San Antonio! LIAM Merv! Come in! You're next! MERV cautiously walks into the office. MERV Is it okay to sit down? LIAM Of course! Why wouldn't it be? MERV takes a seat gingerly. MERV Are you Regis or Liam? LIAM Liam. MERV Oh, that's good! I can relax! LIAM So your resume actually looked pretty solid, Merv. I just noticed one thing... you wrote that you have a disability. MERV Oh, you know me! I always have to go to the bathroom at three in the afternoon! LIAM Yes, I know that. You bring it up every time I see you. Every single time. Without fail. MERV I just don't want to alienate people. It's for the best that I explain it to them. LIAM Why did you not put any references, though? MERV The only person who I could think of that would say good things about me is... me. LIAM Oh... well... MERV Oh, it's three! Sorry, but I got to go! MERV quickly gets up and leaves the office. MERV (T.H.) That's not the only interview I had to leave early to use the bathroom for. Am I worried? Of course not! I got the job last time that happened! LIAM Heather, you're next! HEATHER walks in and takes a seat. LIAM I... was surprised to see you apply... HEATHER Oh, you know me! HEATHER smiles and leans closer to LIAM, making him visibly nervous. LIAM So... you had a great resume... great reference... um... HEATHER Do we really have to go through this? Just hire me! I'm the only candidate with actual gym assistant experience! Those other losers are totally unqualified compared to me! LIAM Er... well... HEATHER Liam, if you hire me, I will cater to your every need. I will do whatever you ask of me. If you tell me to jump, I will jump. I will not ask "How high?" That just needlessly complicates things. LIAM It... does? HEATHER It does. LIAM Fine! Welcome aboard, Heather! You're the new gym assistant! HEATHER Isn't that just grand?! MERV barges into the office. MERV Hey, have you seen that huge stack of pizza boxes in the bathroom?! It's huge! You should call it the Leaning Tower of Pizza! Get it? It's a pun! LIAM What?! BROCK! A furious LIAM jumps up and marches out of the office. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM ARENA BROCK Hey Liam! Who did you hire? LIAM What did you do with those pizza boxes?! BROCK I threw them out! LIAM NO! You moved them into the bathroom! BROCK That's practically throwing them out, isn't it? LIAM I can't believe you! Throw them out! For real! NOW! BROCK Why don't you appreciate my talents? LIAM What talents?! You just stacked a bunch of garbage together! Now throw it out! BROCK Don't tell me what to do! You aren't the boss of me! LIAM YOU'RE RIGHT! I AM NOT THE BOSS OF YOU, BECAUSE YOU DON'T WORK HERE ANYMORE, AND YOU NEVER WILL AGAIN! NOW CLEAN UP AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE SO I CAN DO MY JOB! BROCK stands in silence, shocked. HEATHER hops out of the office. HEATHER Sir, do you need me to take care of him? BROCK No, don't worry about me. I'll be on my way for good, now... BROCK slowly walks into the office. HEATHER I'll escort the other two out of here, then. INT. PEWTER CITY GYM OFFICE LIAM enters as BROCK gathers the rest of his belongings. LIAM watches in silence until BROCK notices. BROCK BROCK gets up and hugs LIAM.What? Have you come to yell at me some more? LIAM (T.H.) As I watched Brock, I felt bad. The two of us used to be a team. What happened? I had to make it up to him somehow. I had to make sure that he was able to move on in life without becoming a complete failure. So that's why I did what I did... LIAM Brock, do you remember Elizabeth? BROCK Don't remind me... LIAM Her affections for you won't real. She was just trying to use you to become a big TV star. BROCK Makes sense. Who the hell would love me, anyway? LIAM Well, remember when you made us buy all those lottery tickets? You told her to keep them once you got over that phase. BROCK Of course I remember. LIAM Well... she won. BROCK Does this have a point? LIAM Brock, even though you scared her away, she's still hellbent on becoming a star! She even helped out with that fundraiser because I told her it would gain your favor! She made me promise that I wouldn't tell you she won the lottery, but I don't care anymore! Don't you see, Brock? You don't have to live life in squalor! You can go to her! BROCK Really? LIAM Absolutely! Just don't tell her I said any of this. BROCK You're doing this all for me? LIAM You two deserve each other. BROCK I don't even know how to thank you! LIAM Don't worry about it. BROCK picks up the box with all of his belongings and takes one last look at the office. BROCK So I guess this is goodbye? LIAM Only for now. I'm sure we'll meet again. After all, Elizabeth lives in town, and I'm sure you'll be getting an invite to my next fundraiser. BROCK And I'm sure I'll attend! BROCK (T.H.) Liam? In the end, he really deserved to be gym leader. He'll do a much better job than I ever did. I have a lot of faith in him. With that, BROCK leaves the office, and the Pewter City Gym altogether. HEATHER enters the office. HEATHER I just saw Brock leave. He seemed... happy? Is everything okay? LIAM Of course everything is! I gave the greatest gift I could give to him: a life of complacency! Now let's get some challengers into this gym! HEATHER Yes, sir! HEATHER (T.H.) Darn it! It seems like Liam is actually focused on doing gym work for now! Hopefully he'll lose his enthusiasm soon enough... LIAM (T.H.) After everything we've been through, I have to say it's a bit bittersweet to see Brock leave. Sure, I got caught up in his antics all the time back then, and now that I have a position of authority, I've realized all of those antics were mistakes, but after thinking about it, I don't think I'd give any of those antics up. Brock may have been a bad gym leader, but he was a great friend. I'm going to make him proud! EXT. MANOR BROCK rings on the doorbell. ELIZABETH opens the door. ELIZABETH Hello? Brock?! I... wasn't expecting to see you here! Oh, and the cameras, too! BROCK Elizabeth, Liam told me all you did to help out the gym. It means a lot to me. BROCK (T.H.) It doesn't. ELIZABETH Is that so? BROCK It is. I also have to say that I'm really sorry for that time I yelled at you. BROCK (T.H.) I'm not. ELIZABETH Really? You are! Brock, that's terrific! BROCK I've given it a lot of thought, and I've come to a decision. Elizabeth... I love you! ELIZABETH hugs BROCK. ELIZABETH I love you, too, Brock! I love you, too! ELIZABETH (T.H.) And what I really love are the cameras! BROCK So, what's with this huge mansion? Are you living in a brothel or something? ELIZABETH Oh, no! I won the lottery! I bought this myself! ELIZABETH (T.H.) I hope telling him that wasn't the wrong move... I don't want my funds sucked dry! BROCK Is it possible you could do me one little favor, now that I love you and want to move in with you? ELIZABETH What is it? BROCK Can you give me money for a car? I've always wanted one! ELIZABETH (T.H.) I knew it. ELIZABETH hands the money over to BROCK. BROCK I'll be right back, love! After some time, BROCK returns. He rings the doorbell once again, and ELIZABETH answers. ELIZABETH You're back? What kind of car did you get? BROCK Please, you believed that? Look what I really got; just for you! BROCK brings a beautiful diamond ring out of his pocket. ELIZABETH Oh my Arceus! You bought that?! For me?! Brock, you're amazing! BROCK I know! ELIZABETH (T.H.) It seems I had nothing to worry about after all! Brock truly loves me. What a sucker! I don't care about his feelings as long as it gets me on TV! I wonder why he brought all his stuff from the gym over, though. You'd look at it and think he wasn't the gym leader anymore! BROCK (T.H.) Elizabeth fell for that one hook, line, and sinker! Trust me, the car is coming up next! Liam will be so impressed when I drive up to the gym in something cool! Looks like life is going to be smooth sailing for me! I just wish I was able to find a better woman... |
And now, just a short wrap up, for those that would like to read it.
I've been working on this story for what I believe has been close to half of a year. It's the first fanfiction I've ever finished, though it doesn't hold the distinction of being the first story I ever finished (I wrote a story last year from mid-January to mid-February in what could be called my own personal NaNoWriMo). When I took a look at that last scene I wrote between Brock and Liam, I basically went "Wow!" It was such a perfect culmination of everything that had come before. I believe endings are the most important part of the story, and I feel like I did stick the landing! I'd also like to thank the 8 people who voted for me during the SPP Fanfiction Awards (I'm have a pretty good feeling about who most of you are :P). Coming in second for best comedy and first (!!) for best human character was impressive. I know that when reading a fanfic, there's always that fear that the author may just give up on it, so I'd like to thank you for (hopefully) sticking with me these six months. As for where the story goes from here, I have a couple of ideas on where I could take this for a possible sequel, but before I even begin to write about that I'd have to have all the character arcs plotted out beforehand. Mainly, I've been wondering if I should write about Brock's rise from the ashes or his fall to rock bottom. If I do write a sequel, I'd probably make it more ambitious and juggle more characters and plots per episode, so look forward to it if I ever do decide to write it! And that's a wrap! I'll request to have this moved to the archives in a couple of weeks, but before then, be sure to get your final thoughts in! If you've been lurking the fic this whole time, feel free to pipe in with your last words, too! I hope you've all enjoyed this! |
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Anyways, awesome last chapter, there! I knew that Brock would be staying at the gym and never want to leave. Poor tower pizza. D: I do like the scene were Brock talks to Liam over some of the shenanigans they had done. Ouch over Liam yelling at Brock, but glad their last scene together ended nicely and I agree it wrapped up everything nicely! Speaking of which, oh dear over Brock and Elizabeth getting married. That shall be fun. XD Don't worry Brock, you'll find a better woman...eventually. :x Hm, in the end you decide how you want to do the sequel, but it would be interesting to see Brock fall to rock bottom. Either way though, looking forward to the sequel whenever you get the chance to do so! Congrats on finishing this story! I really enjoyed it lots. :) A job well done. *brofist* (but not the San Antonio and Houston kind, LOL) |
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