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-   -   1,000 ways to be kicked out of Walmart (https://www.pokecommunity.com/showthread.php?t=250977)

deoxys121 July 8th, 2011 10:23 AM

144. Walk into the produce section and find one of those giant things of oranges. Then, dive into it as if it were a ball pit.

RetardRaichu July 14th, 2011 5:55 AM

145.
Dress up as a hobo and yell at people, "Why do you get such a good life? IT'S NOT FAIR!!" and go into a crazy rage and hug people's legs. :3

Hikamaru July 14th, 2011 7:13 AM

146

Say you leaked diplomatic cables and told the staff you're wanted somewhere.. on the other side of the world just because someone thinks you've stalked them on purpose. It's like they're trying to extradite you to the country in question and eventually you lose your job at Walmart because they believe you are "dangerous material".

Don't even think about this joke's origin.

deoxys121 July 20th, 2011 9:00 AM

147. Grab a tennis ball off one of the shelves and toss it at someone shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

smithtism July 20th, 2011 9:21 AM

148

Doing the same thing as ^, but in the cosmetics section and throwing a bottle of nail polish instead.

deoxys121 July 20th, 2011 9:35 AM

149. Go around Walmart doing a "Jackass: The Movie" maneuver by sneaking up behind people and shaving a patch of their hair with hair clippers.

lahishendeeir July 23rd, 2011 10:03 PM

150. walk in & make fun of that one scary low-life employee who seems racist aaaannnddd who's from dwarf land! D:

Pave Low July 24th, 2011 12:07 PM

151. Ask for an English product...

deoxys121 July 24th, 2011 1:31 PM

152. Have a go-kart race through the long aisles using the shopping carts.

Jarred0809 August 8th, 2011 12:34 PM

Create a trail of gravy leading to the bathrooms and dressing rooms.

Make sandwiches and put them all on the floor.

Walk up to every employee in the store and ask, "Where's Kyle?"

Pick up a broom and run around the jewelry section shouting "LEEEEEROYYYYYYYY JENKINS!"

mameshiba August 8th, 2011 12:38 PM

154. camp out in the tents and live there living off the grocery section

U.Flame August 8th, 2011 1:20 PM

Ask them where the heart of Walmart is, then attempt to end the madness.

smithtism August 8th, 2011 3:01 PM

157:

Go to the bakery section, grab some donuts, put them over your eyes, and run around screaming about your super donut vision.

deoxys121 August 9th, 2011 1:35 PM

158: Paint yourself with white makeup and stand still in the clothing section to look like a mannequin, then scare people as they walk by.

U.Flame August 9th, 2011 5:53 PM

159: When someone asks if they can help, say "NO! Go away!". Then shortly after, ask for help as if nothing happened.

愛点三三 August 12th, 2011 2:36 PM

160: Fail to break into their computers, and make them nodes in a botnet.

...Yes, that actually happened, no, it wasn't me. He was kicked out in handcuffs.

deoxys121 August 12th, 2011 2:41 PM

161: Dump a bunch of cat litter on the floor of the pet supply section, and release a bunch of cats in said area.

Skip Class August 12th, 2011 4:21 PM

162: Chuck everything in your trolley probably adding up to $1000, then ditch when you go to pay

cbd98 August 12th, 2011 5:45 PM

163. Find the smallest trike you can, ride it around the store, and when someone looks at you scream, "DON'T JUDGE ME!!"

SV August 12th, 2011 6:49 PM

164. Hijack the comm system and announced that the toilets are no longer working because someone made "big doodoo", which caused the toilets to stop working.

Freddy Fazbear August 16th, 2011 4:36 PM

165. Go into the sporting goods section, grab some tennis balls and a raquet, and start launching the tennis balls at people.

Skip Class August 16th, 2011 11:25 PM

166. Hug every person you see and take photos of them and put them on a Facebook Album named "People I meet at Walmart" - Privaaaaacy Invasion!

U.Flame August 16th, 2011 11:58 PM

By stealing a cart and have your friend push you home.

Skip Class August 17th, 2011 12:20 AM

168. BY GLOMPING ALL THE STAFF MEMBERS

Elite Overlord LeSabre™ August 17th, 2011 4:44 PM

169. Go in there dressed as Sailor Moon and throw your tiara at random shoppers while yelling "MOON TIARA MAGIC!"

Skip Class August 18th, 2011 1:59 PM

169. Grab a bunch of pals, hack into the sound system and start doing the Cha Cha Slide in the Middle of Walmart

U.Flame August 18th, 2011 2:32 PM

170: Go to random people buying something and say "You don't want that here. Target has that at a cheaper price."

xXToukoWhiteXx August 18th, 2011 2:37 PM

Free fishie!
 
Break or pour over all of the fish tanks yelling, 'Free Willy!'

Skip Class August 18th, 2011 5:11 PM

172. Rung around the entire store yelling "99 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, 99 BTTLES OF BEER, TAKE ONE DOWN PASS IT AROUND 98 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL"
And when you get to 0 START BACK FROM THE BEGINNING :D

Elite Overlord LeSabre™ August 21st, 2011 11:06 AM

173. Get 41 of your friends together and re-create the 1995 Daytona 500 inside the store using shopping carts.

Zeph. August 25th, 2011 7:51 AM

174: Bring a cat in and glue some lettuce to it's back so you can pretend you have a Bulbasaur. Hell you could go even further and shout "Bullet Seed!" before spitting out peas through a straw.

deoxys121 August 25th, 2011 7:55 AM

175. Hack the PA system and make an announcement: "This is not a drill! We have received word that several bombs have been planted throughout the store!"

Zeph. August 25th, 2011 7:56 AM

176: Have a game of Jenga with wine bottles...

deoxys121 August 25th, 2011 7:57 AM

177. Have a game of putt-putt golf in the main aisles.

Zeph. August 25th, 2011 8:02 AM

178: Casually entering the shop on horseback.

Ciax August 26th, 2011 11:00 PM

179 - When someone steps away to look at something, grab their trolley and walk off without saying a word.

Mr. X August 26th, 2011 11:30 PM

180 - Have sex in the changing rooms.

181 - Hand out condoms to the ugliest people you can find.

182 - Turn off any lightswitch you find.

Ciax August 27th, 2011 2:52 AM

183 - Attempt to cross breed cats and dogs and when told to stop yell at the worker tht you are on the verge of a massive scientific discovery

deoxys121 August 27th, 2011 10:53 AM

184. Dress up as the Grim Reaper and wave at every senior citizen in the store.

Freddy Fazbear August 27th, 2011 11:44 AM

Get a lot of silly string, tape it to your wrists, and go around pretending to be spider man shooting webs at people.

.Fenris August 27th, 2011 1:07 PM

186. Go to Sporting Goods, grab a bat/club, walk over to the glassware and, when stopped by staff, say "I'll pay for it after I get some practice in, ok?"

Kung Fu Ferret August 27th, 2011 1:40 PM

187. If there's a Starbucks in the Walmart, go up to the barista, put your hands on your hips, and say "I can't let you brew that, Starbucks!"

Reddo August 27th, 2011 2:48 PM

188. Get a knife, go to any corridor, throw ketchup all over the place and just say: "I can't believe she's dead!"

(Don't forget to put some ketchup on the knife as well.)

deoxys121 August 27th, 2011 6:08 PM

189. Go into the dressing room with a melted chocolate bar, smear the melted chocolate all over your hand, then reach your had out at the next person to walk by and ask "Could you give me some toilet paper?"

metalheadtomboy August 27th, 2011 11:13 PM

Go into a changing room and say im all out of toliet paper!

Kung Fu Ferret August 28th, 2011 2:18 PM

Let all of the lobsters free!

Ciax August 30th, 2011 12:46 AM

192. Dress as batman and run around the store screaming "COME ROBIN TOO THE BATMOBILE'
193. Follow some one about three metres behind and stay there until they leave the store.
194. Go the toilet with a cantaloupe and after some grunting drop the cantaloupe in the toilet and say loudly "phew thats better"


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