![]() |
Quote:
I don't want to turn this thread into a debate, though. I'm just saying that this endorsement is pretty premature. |
I'll join this.
I think I am asexual, but I can't be sure (after all, I'm only young). But despite my age I support in gay rights and believe if two people love each other their gender shouldn't matter. |
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
OK. Now the official business is over, I can actually get discussing stuff :P On the "who chooses to be gay" line, I've actually come across a lot of parents who perpetuate this with their denial. Like, "oh he's just doing this to be rebellious" etc, simply because they can't get their head around the fact that the life they had envisioned for their child will not be the life their child gets. I think the worst thing a parent can do for a child is to want things for them. Let people want for themselves. |
Quote:
I'm a closeted asexual, particularly because during my age (school mostly) people will consider you rather... disorientated. |
Ah, parents. This has actually given me inspiration for a new topic to introduce.
Have you come out of the closet? If so, and if you feel comfortable enough here in this safe space, share your coming out story with us. How did your parents/friends take it? Describe the scenario. Or, if you aren't of a minority sexuality and are posting here as an ally, tell us what it's like on the other side. Has anyone ever come out to you? Were they scared of how you'd react? How did they do it? |
Quote:
Quote:
But in-between all of the drama with the last guy i told i also told another one of my close friends. This time i wanted to see if it was any easier to tell someone in person rather than have that horrible part of silence over IM when the other person is typing. To do this when i met up with him i said i had something to tell him, because he was the really annoying noisy friend i knew he wouldn't let it drop until i told him. So we went the whole day and we met up with one of his friends and by the end he was starting to loose it because i'd still yet to tell him lol. After walking his friend home i thought i'd say it, this was actually a billion times harder than doing it over IM xD i was so nervous when the words came out of my mouth my entire body went tense. My hands went into fists so tight that my finger nails drew blood from my palms. But after that we decided to take the long way back to my bus stop so he could ask questions and such. He actually took it quite well which was a relief. He still finds it funny to take the mick out of me because of it though ¬.¬ And then after that i thought i'd try getting someone else to tell them, so i got the friend who i told in person to tell two of my other friends that i was gay. To be quite honest i found it amusing as usually they don't stop arguing and never shut but after he told them they went completely mute. There ok with it too, so everything worked out fine there. And then finally i thought i'd tell the rest of my friends via facebook. I posted a status that someone on PC helped me write because my english skills suck xD At first people thought it was a joke and someone facebook raped me but once it finally sunk in i got a few messages saying that they were cool with it, and even better not a single message saying something negative :D about half my friend list did un-friend me over the next few weeks but still, at least they did it discreetly :D |
As an ally of this place, I have known people who are gay, but no one has really come out to me. I'm not exactly the person who is everyone's best friend. I've known people who are gay and stuff, but I haven't had anyone come up to me and tell me that they are gay.
Anyway, this has brought me to thinking. Last year for a project, someone I knew who was in one of my certificate courses made a video for a totally not-related subject. Anyway, he made a mini-movie based on what like would be like if the whole gay/straight thing was reversed. So it was normal to be gay, and considered "weird" to our society today to be straight. I can say it sure was interesting. |
Quote:
|
Quote:
I did tell a friend of mine a few months ago, he didn't take it well, he has nothing against gay people but he wasnt exactly happy about it, we dont talk to each other anymore. I met an FtM recently who just assumed that I had no interest in the opposite sex however I dont really plan to tell anyone else for a while now. |
Hi, I've been lurking this thread lately, but I'd like to join. I support the LGBTQ community 100% :). Anyway, I'll answer some of the new topics here so that I can keep the conversation going.
No, I haven't come out of the closet, but I've told two of my friends. I knew one of them wouldn't accept me, so I had to explain to her that homosexuality wasn't a choice, and that it is the way people are. I remember she said something about an "It Gets Better" video that she was looking at, and she had kind of set me off. She didn't know how hard it was for some people, and she asked me why I knew about all this, and I said it was because I'm gay, because I wanted to be honest. I told her that she was the first person I had told, and it was fine, but it was kind of a shock for her. It had caused a little anger with me from her, but we made up again. Then I told my other friend. She doesn't like inappropriate jokes, and is mostly set off from the other kids, so I told her, and she was completely fine with it. So far, these are the only people I've told. |
Have you come out of the closet? If so, and if you feel comfortable enough here in this safe space, share your coming out story with us. How did your parents/friends take it? Describe the scenario.
Or, if you aren't of a minority sexuality and are posting here as an ally, tell us what it's like on the other side. Has anyone ever come out to you? Were they scared of how you'd react? How did they do it? I advocate passively being out rather than actively coming out. Heterosexuals don't have to come out, so why should others? It draws unnecessary attention to the situation and reinforces the idea that it's so different that one felt the need to announce it. |
I'm trying to convince two people that are close to me (friend and family member) to come out of the closet and tell people. But, it's not working out to well, they're both girls, and they don't really want to be judged. My friends mom and dad are deeply against gay/bisexual marriages and people. I don't understand why they do, but they don't let any of her gay friends come into their house or at least while they are there. She once asked her parents what they would do if she was a lesbian and they told her that they would probably disown her. I really thought that was horrible, but I highly doubt her parents would do that.
As for my cousin, my family judges. A lot. But, I'm trying to get her to tell her mom, not her dad tho. I'm pretty sure her mom will be more understanding than her dad. Her mom is nice and all, but she's a bit suspicious because she overheard a part of our conversation. Her dad on the other hand is strongly against it. He even said all gay people should go shoot themselves because it's unnatural. He's the type of person who wouldn't be scared to beat his kids, and he even said 'If I end up killing one, I'll just make another one.' So yea, I don't know if I should still help them some out with it, but I told them I'm here for them. |
Quote:
|
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Also, your friend - if he didn't take it well and doesn't talk to you anymore, are you sure he doesn't have anything against gay people? Quote:
|
I'm joining. I wasn't a part of the social group, so hopefully I'll be active in the club. As for how I identify: genderqueer biromantic asexual
I haven't come out as anything in real life. My parents are very religious (my mother particularly so), and they're really not open at all to anything different than "normal". Especially trans* issues. Anytime they're presented with an opportunity to learn, they ignore. So I'm keeping my identity as much of a secret as I can from them. It's also from their raising that I wasn't even aware of gays until I entered high school, which was the experience that completely opened my mind to...everything. (That, and the Internet, of course.) Plus I know a lot of other close-minded people who assume that I should act more of how my sex says I should act rather than the way I'm most comfortable being. (To give some insight, I'm a female assigned at birth, who has a fluid gender, presents as androgynous, and prefers either gender-neutral pronouns [zie and zir] or male pronouns.) Then there's the fact that some of the people that I spend my days with don't have good views on people who are bi. And asexuality isn't that well-known. So if I do come out, there's a lot of explaining I would have to do, and some days I'm just so tired of explaining everything every time. On the plus side, there are a few people that know what I am. Only one person in real life knows, and he accepts me no matter what I do, so knowing him helps me get through my days. And all of my friends online have some idea about me because I'm more comfortable online. Which is quite obvious from this post. |
Hi, Asty! :D Good to see you joining. Also.. biromantic? Haven't heard that term. Sounds it would be something like dating either gender, depending on the person, even if you don't have any physical spark with them. Like.. a mental type crush, or something. That might be just typical asexuality, though.
&Ctrl.Alt.Geak, sorry about how your mom reacted some years back. I feel bad for anyone who's parents either deny, ignore, or try to talk them out of it. My mom did a bit of the ignoring the issue for awhile, but apparently it was still on her mind a lot, even if she didn't want to bring it up with me, and pay attention to it. She eventually did, though. I can't understand how some parents would disown their own child, or deny their feelings, etc. It's depressing to think about. |
I've never heard the term biromantic either, I'd love to hear more about it. The more diversity the better. Welcome Astinus!
|
I think biromantic is when someone enjoys the romantic side of a relationship, like cuddles and love-notes.
I'm only guessing though, |
Well google says biromantic is when an asexual person is attracted more than one gender but without physical attraction.
I love this group so much, i seem to be learning more and more about these things every day :D like i didn't even know there were gender-neutral pronouns x] Welcome to the group Astinus! |
Quote:
Just because an asexual doesn't feel the need for sex doesn't mean we don't have the same emotional needs as everyone else. :P For further study, here's a good resource for a lot of the terminology used by asexuals: [link] |
Hello everyone, and welcome to the new members (which I finally added to the list!)
Sorry for not posting, been getting ready for graduation. |
Quote:
On a lighter note; welcome to BlooMilkC and Astinus! :) |
Have you come out of the closet? If so, and if you feel comfortable enough here in this safe space, share your coming out story with us. How did your parents/friends take it? Describe the scenario.
I didn't really come out of the closet. It was more like I was exposed. The first time I was exposed was when my father started to dig around my browser history & found out what I was looking up on the internet. It's normal for a teenage boy to be curious about that kind of stuff. Don't judge. Anyways...you can imagine he wasn't pleased to find out his only son was looking up two guys kissing. He confronted me about & I remember his exact words to this day. "If you choose to live that kind of lifestyle you can no longer stay under my roof.". I was 14 at the time. Two years later I decided to come out to a friend who I thought I could confide in. I was wrong. She went told everyone she could. Eventually I lost a few friends & after a while my best friend, or who I thought was my best friend, stopped talking to me & avoided me like the plague. A year passed & this time I decided to come out to some of my family members. I told my mother first & she kind of expected it, but to this day she won't accept my sexuality. I told an uncle (dad's brother) next & he had the opposite reaction my dad had. He assured me that I was still his nephew & no matter who I was or what I did he would still love me. A year after I came out to him, another uncle of mine confronted me about my sexuality. Somehow he knew, but his reaction was the same as my other uncle. I was shocked by what he did. I was expecting the same reaction I got from my mother because they're both very religious, but instead he told me he still loves me as if I was his own son & gave me a hug. So the moral of the story is people will disappoint you & they'll abandon you. But only the most loving & caring will stay by your side. /hallmark moment :'-) Quote:
|
Quote:
I dont' have a "coming out" story, but the closest I can get to it is breaking away from my religious family in that they don't agree with it. It shouldn't be too difficult, considering I have a very liberal aunt and grandmother, but still, it's a weird feeling to finally have an opinion way different than how you were raised to think. Quote:
Had a lot of reading and catching up to do, but I agree with Hybrid Trainer. It's so great to learn about all this stuff. :) Also, about parents having difficult reactions, I'm not a parent, and don't really intend on being one (or well, at least not soon), but I am a sympathizer. I imagine it's hard to accept when your child has become something you disapprove of, or something that you would have never expected or wanted from your child. In all honesty, if I had a child that came out as being gay, I would have a hard time accepting it too, however, I wouldn't go as far to disown them and/or stop loving them. I'd learn to accept it eventually. I guess the whole "disowning" thing is just a weird way of trying to deal with it for them. This is just what I'm assuming though, judging from the stories here and stories I've heard elsewhere. Or, if you aren't of a minority sexuality and are posting here as an ally, tell us what it's like on the other side. Has anyone ever come out to you? Were they scared of how you'd react? How did they do it? I have never had anyone come out to me. But this does remind me of another story. My Bible face-shoving friend (yeah, I'll mention her a lot) dated a guy for three years that was using her as a cover up. And she had noooo idea. Figured she would have caught on by the fact he wouldn't kiss her or anything, but then again, they were younger so idk. But anyway, he eventually broke up with her after coming out and pretty much everyone in school thought she made him gay. Even she was convinced of it at one point, and just thought she turned guys gay. People wouldn't even talk to her and it was pretty much impossible for her to get a boyfriend for about a year. Yeah, I've jumped topics like four times in one post. D; My bad, lmao. |
Omg twisted that is amazing that you could take something positive from such a negative experience. Its great about how your uncles reacted but to hear that from your own father must've been a horrible.
|
| All times are GMT -8. The time now is 12:20 AM. |
![]()
© 2002 - 2018 The PokéCommunity™, pokecommunity.com.
Pokémon characters and images belong to The Pokémon Company International and Nintendo. This website is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Nintendo, Creatures, GAMEFREAK, The Pokémon Company or The Pokémon Company International. We just love Pokémon.
All forum styles, their images (unless noted otherwise) and site designs are © 2002 - 2016 The PokéCommunity / PokéCommunity.com.
PokéCommunity™ is a trademark of The PokéCommunity. All rights reserved. Sponsor advertisements do not imply our endorsement of that product or service. User generated content remains the property of its creator.
Acknowledgements
Use of PokéCommunity Assets
vB Optimise by DragonByte Technologies Ltd © 2023.