The PokéCommunity Forums

The PokéCommunity Forums (https://www.pokecommunity.com/index.php)
-   Fan Fiction & Writing (https://www.pokecommunity.com/forumdisplay.php?f=20)
-   -   Pokémon Burn (https://www.pokecommunity.com/showthread.php?t=343777)

Wicked3DS February 8th, 2015 9:58 PM

Burn
 
Entry for Flash Fiction Week #1:

Damien arrived, still in disbelief of what everyone was telling him. Then he saw it with his own eyes: Ecruteak City was up in flames.

He scrambled into the city to see where the flames were coming from as people ran frantically to get out. He noticed that there was a significant amount of fire spreading from Tin Tower, so he acted quickly.

“Totodile, Noctowl, come on out! Fly up to the top and see if you can put the flames out at the source!”

Noctowl flew up with Totodile on its back. They found the source of the flames and Totodile used Hydro Pump while Noctowl hovered around the building. Meanwhile, Damien called out his Onix to start digging up dirt and using Stone Edge to snuff out flames on ground level. Just then, he heard a familiar voice.

“You can’t stop this Damien!”

It was Arthur, riding on a large bird that appeared to be on fire.

“Arthur? Where the hell did you get a Moltres?!”

“I have…connections. You’re wasting your time here. If you take me down, another will take my place. Oh, and this also means you’re not getting out of here without a burn. Hit the tower, Moltres!”

Moltres flew over to Tin Tower and used Flamethrower to undo all of the work that Totodile and Noctowl had done. Damien recalled Onix immediately as this happened, while Noctowl quickly flew back to Damien and let him get on before they took off. Arthur was hot on their tail and Damien needed to act quickly before they were scorched.

“Toto – er hmm? Oh, Croconaw! Use Hydro Pump!”

The newly evolved Croconaw shot a powerful stream of water at Moltres and hit it straight on, disturbing it's flight pattern. Noctowl flew faster toward Olivine, weaving into the woods as it soared past the MooMoo Farm. Motlres caught them, but Damien was already thinking ahead.

“Croconaw, Hydro Pump one more time!”

Croconaw landed a devastating hit on Moltres, forcing it to stop completely to avoid hitting a tree. Noctowl flew out of the woods and into Olivine City, but not before Arthur chimed in.

“Don’t worry, Damien! Your hometown is still turning to ashes and that’s all that’s necessary!”

Noctowl landed them safely in Olivine City, but people around had already heard what had happened in Ecruteak. Damien could not afford to look around for answers anymore. He had to get the fight over with.

destinedjagold February 8th, 2015 10:35 PM

The story's pacing was kinda...fast. Although I am interested to know who these characters are and what made Arthur burn the town down.
Also...

Quote:

He noticed that were was a significant amount of fire spreading from Tin Tower,
I think it's supposed to be [there] instead of [were]?

Wicked3DS February 9th, 2015 4:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by destinedjagold (Post 8612194)
The story's pacing was kinda...fast. Although I am interested to know who these characters are and what made Arthur burn the town down.
Also...


I think it's supposed to be [there] instead of [were]?

Good catch, thanks for that, it's been fixed.

Its actually part of a later chapter in a fanfic I've been slowly working on and this gave me an excuse to think about it and also get some critiques on it, so preferably I'd like to not spoil why the town is being burnt down :P


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 3:19 AM.


Like our Facebook Page Follow us on Twitter © 2002 - 2018 The PokéCommunity™, pokecommunity.com.
Pokémon characters and images belong to The Pokémon Company International and Nintendo. This website is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Nintendo, Creatures, GAMEFREAK, The Pokémon Company or The Pokémon Company International. We just love Pokémon.
All forum styles, their images (unless noted otherwise) and site designs are © 2002 - 2016 The PokéCommunity / PokéCommunity.com.
PokéCommunity™ is a trademark of The PokéCommunity. All rights reserved. Sponsor advertisements do not imply our endorsement of that product or service. User generated content remains the property of its creator.

Acknowledgements
Use of PokéCommunity Assets
vB Optimise by DragonByte Technologies Ltd © 2023.