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-   -   ~Make A Wish and have it horribly corrupted ~ (https://www.pokecommunity.com/showthread.php?t=389808)

Starlight February 12th, 2021 3:39 PM

Here you go... 5 cents USD. Don't spend it all at once!

I wish for another season of a TV show I like that was cancelled before its time.

Mercurybro February 12th, 2021 3:41 PM

Granted, but the T.V. show is voiced and subtitled in a language you do not understand, and the quality is in black and white.

I wish I had a larger aquarium.

Roni February 12th, 2021 8:38 PM

granted, but it only works if you use Mountain Dew on it.

i wish my back didn't hurt whenever i bent down to pick something up.

Squirtlenator February 13th, 2021 5:37 AM

Granted but, everything else does.

I wish I could get a good night's sleep

Roni February 14th, 2021 7:39 PM

granted, but it's night time everywhere at some point thanks to timezones, so you're now sleepy every moment of your life.

i wish everyone had a bidet in their home.

Squirtlenator February 15th, 2021 6:38 AM

Granted but, now there's a world wide water shortage. Hope that clean bottom was worth it

I wish cleaning was as easy as the snap of the fingers

Roni February 15th, 2021 8:24 AM

granted, but you break a finger each time you try to snap now.

i wish i could sleep 8 hours worth in just 10 minutes of real time.

Starlight February 15th, 2021 9:41 AM

Granted, but in the post covid apocalypse, that will only be the equivalent of 7 minutes now ;)

I wish for some pumpkin spice cheesecake to appear in my fridge

Squirtlenator February 15th, 2021 10:17 AM

Granted, go look. Go on. I know you're curious. It's there. It should be right behind the milk...

I wish for a new car

ZeoStar February 15th, 2021 3:12 PM

Granted but the engine is entirely missing.

I wish for the infinity gauntlet

Squirtlenator February 15th, 2021 3:54 PM

Granted but, there are no infinity stones attached to it.

I wish I could time travel

Starlight February 15th, 2021 9:13 PM

Granted but you lose your ability mid jump and get lost in the nothingness for all eternity, not aging and unable to die, just existing...

I wish for a puppy

Squirtlenator February 16th, 2021 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash Ketchup (Post 10281981)
What if hot dogs were actually made from puppies?

I'm not sure that I can trust you with a puppy...wouldn't you PURRfer a kitten?

I wish for a private jet

Starlight February 17th, 2021 2:51 AM

Granted. Here is a rusty old carburettor, you now have several private jets.

I wish for my lawn to never need cutting

Roni February 17th, 2021 7:26 AM

granted, it's nothing but dead, barren soil now, and nothing will ever grow on it again...

i wish Moses in the Bible was called Shawn

Starlight February 17th, 2021 9:24 AM

Granted but now he didn't part the red sea cause he's Shawn of the dead, see?

I wish for no more pips in fruit

Roni February 17th, 2021 9:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash Ketchup (Post 10284862)
Granted but now he didn't part the red sea cause he's Shawn of the dead, see?

brilliance before my eyes *sniff*

granted, they're now in all of your pants and underwear.

i wish fruits and veggies tasted like their junk food counterparts while still maintaining their healthiness.

bg February 18th, 2021 9:50 PM

Granted, but now fruits and veggies are banned in some countries so junk food companies don't go into bankruptcy

I wish people used solar energy instead of oil and carbon

Squirtlenator February 19th, 2021 1:58 PM

granted but, all of the volcanos erupt, spewing ash and debris into the atmosphere blocking out the sun. Now we are all screwed.

I wish that my wish can't be corrupted

Starlight February 19th, 2021 2:28 PM

Granted. Your wish for that wish not to be corrupted came true! Pity you didn't wish for something else though 😎

I wish for self cooking pizza

Tsutarja February 19th, 2021 5:02 PM

Granted, but now the microwave is extinct! You can no longer heat things without the stove or the oven.

I wish I knew how to actually grill food

Roni February 19th, 2021 7:18 PM

granted, but now grills break every time you touch them.

i wish the next 3 posters would corrupt this wish somehow.

ZeoStar February 19th, 2021 7:55 PM

...i want to post 3 times so badly but it might not go over well. So granted, but the next 3 posters get chased by jason vorhees because he didn't want the wish to get corrupted.

I wish to watch baby turtles hatch from an egg in real life

Roni February 20th, 2021 3:38 PM

Granted, but they hatch at the middle of a busy intersection and you're too far away to be able to do anything.

I wish I could freeze time when I sleep so I don't lose any hours of the day while always getting sufficient rest.

ZeoStar February 20th, 2021 4:21 PM

that's horrible.

also granted, but freezing time opens a portal and brings a random deceased person from history back to life. (and it can be anybody).

I wish baby turtles had invincibility.

Starlight February 21st, 2021 4:19 PM

Granted. Now they're completely invincible but are born as soulless husks.

I wish for the 3DS to be re-continued...

ZeoStar February 21st, 2021 5:11 PM

Granted, but they've been contaminated and holding one is lethal.

I wish I would stop getting creepy game ads. (

Squirtlenator February 21st, 2021 5:39 PM

Granted but, now you get bombarded by all kinds of other ads

I wish that this wish can't be corrupted and I wish that everyone could live happily ever after

Roni February 21st, 2021 5:58 PM

granted. thread's over guys, we can't spam here anymore.

i wish we could corrupt wishes normally again tho

Arcaneum February 21st, 2021 6:15 PM

Wish granted - the thread's re-opened but... it seems your ability to disable it again has been removed???????

I really wish it wasn't 02:14 on a work night

Starlight February 21st, 2021 6:18 PM

Granted! But now it's 02:18 on a work night ;)

I wish for no more pointless movie remakes.

Roni February 21st, 2021 6:31 PM

granted, all movie remakes will now have at least one person pointing at something at some point

i wish commuting anywhere was free and only took 10 seconds max

Starlight February 22nd, 2021 10:34 AM

Granted, but you lose an inch in height every time you travel!

I wish they wouldn't put chocolates I don't like in multi-box selections.

PageEmp February 22nd, 2021 9:19 PM

Granted. The ones you don’t like aren’t in, but the ones you simply can’t stand are.

I wish I had more motivation to continue my Glazed comic.

Allen303 February 22nd, 2021 9:21 PM

granted, but now glazed is so old that everyone started calling you grandfather!
I wish I was Captain America! and also got the shield and super-soldier serum!

Megan February 22nd, 2021 9:52 PM

You get your wish but shortly after the US decides to rename itself. You miss that note and from here on out you're only called "Captain from a country previously known as America".

I wish I was more intelligent!

PageEmp February 23rd, 2021 4:32 AM

Granted. Every second, you get smarter. Unfortunately, gaining so many facts so quickly ultimately results in your brain exploding sooner or later.

I wish I could share my plans for my Glazed comic online, and nobody will think they are spoilers.

Starlight February 23rd, 2021 3:56 PM

Granted but the plans are read by a rival creator and stolen before you can use them.

I wish I'd never heard "One" by Metallica

PageEmp February 23rd, 2021 6:19 PM

Granted. You’ve never heard “One”, but you’ve heard “Two”, “Three”, and “Four”. All of them are the same as that song, but the song is played twice, thrice, and so on.

I wished I could memorise all my study notes.

Allen303 February 23rd, 2021 6:41 PM

granted but you will forget them in exams, tests, etc and will remember them after they are done!
I wish I could work with chainsmokers, and c418

Roni February 24th, 2021 5:24 AM

granted, you are now in an office filled with heavy cigarette-smoking individuals and 18 C4 dynamites all around.

i wish every single one of the rich would share their wealth equally with the rest of the world.

bg February 25th, 2021 12:55 PM

Granted, but since every person has exactly the same amount of money, the world gets entangled into a massive guerrilla war where people fight for money. At the end money becomes useless and mankind goes into extinction because the food crops were destroyed, polluted, eaten by other animals, or filled with deadly land mines.

I wish for a cookie.

Squirtlenator February 25th, 2021 5:40 PM

here you go 🍪


I wish for infinite wishes

Roni February 25th, 2021 7:21 PM

granted. in exchange they all only have a 1/8192 chance of coming true.

i wish i always slept early so i could know what it's like to wake up at 6am fully refreshed...

Allen303 February 25th, 2021 7:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Roni (Post 10294779)
granted. in exchange they all only have a 1/8192 chance of coming true.

i wish I always slept early so I could know what it's like to wake up at 6 am fully refreshed...

Spoiler:
in real life, it's painful bro I wake up at 5 am

granted but you will get up when there will be 6 am at Moscow

bg February 25th, 2021 7:38 PM

granted but... looks like you didn't wish for anything, so nothing happens.

I wish i had a portal gun

Allen303 February 25th, 2021 7:44 PM

granted you have a little kids portal gun
I wish I could bring back dinosaurs!

Starlight February 25th, 2021 7:58 PM

Granted but they eat you!!!

I wish for 30+°C tomorrow

bg February 25th, 2021 8:04 PM

Granted but the temperature and sun radiation keeps increasing until reaching drought-like levels. All the water around you starts boiling, including the water inside your body, so you die from suffocation and third-degree sunburns.

I wish i had a sun-powered car

Roni February 25th, 2021 11:06 PM

granted, but you now have a nightshift job.

i wish i had a drawing tablet right now

Fritz February 26th, 2021 1:46 AM

Granted, but it comes without a pen

I wish my internet connection was better

PageEmp February 26th, 2021 2:37 AM

Granted. It goes so fast that it constantly loads into random pages before you react.

I wish tonights direct came out right now.

Roni February 26th, 2021 3:20 AM

granted, but your internet goes out as soon as it starts and will take 20 minutes to get up and running again.

i wish it weren't the weekend yet tomorrow.

Starlight February 26th, 2021 9:20 AM

Granted, but you never have a weekend again!

I wish for movie studios to make some new movies, instead of ripping off stuff that isn't even that old.

Roni February 26th, 2021 9:51 AM

granted, but it's all randomly generated plots now. can't rip off something that doesn't make any sense now eh?

i wish phones didn't need charging and we could have a full battery always

ZeoStar February 26th, 2021 5:24 PM

Granted but the magical phone fairy only gives those kinds of phones out to google employees.

I wish for a pokemon marvel crossover movie

Squirtlenator February 26th, 2021 6:08 PM

Granted but, Thanos snapped away half of the pokedex...oh wait Game Freak already did that

I wish that I was the best at everything

Roni February 26th, 2021 7:06 PM

granted, but it's all just surface level knowledge and skill and you can't ever really dedicate yourself to master one thing as a passion anymore.

i wish i always had perfect teeth

Starlight February 27th, 2021 2:00 PM

Granted. You now have perfect teeth for drawing blood with, vampire Roni!

I wish I wasn't scared of heights

Fritz February 27th, 2021 2:16 PM

Granted, but now you are stuck in a small building forever, and as a result are unable to experience the heights

I wish I could watch every MCU film for the first time again

Squirtlenator February 28th, 2021 1:54 PM

Granted but, your entire memory has been wiped and you have to relearn everything again


I wish that I could see the future...

Starlight February 28th, 2021 2:45 PM

Granted, you can now only watch tv shows from Kiribati!

I wish I wasn't so lazy

Squirtlenator February 28th, 2021 8:36 PM

Granted but, now you're super hyper and can't sit still.

I wish that I was more efficient at getting things done

Roni February 28th, 2021 9:55 PM

granted, but now you have no more time or motivation to post here :c

i wish all my VPPs were shiny~

Megan February 28th, 2021 10:45 PM

Granted, but they all only award negative points and can not be used for medals etc.

I wish I was depressed less often

Starlight March 1st, 2021 11:10 AM

Granted - do I really have to corrupt this? - but now you can't feel anything 😔

I wish I could play all instruments!

Roni March 1st, 2021 7:04 PM

granted, but you can only manage one note on each one.

i wish everyone on PC averaged 80 posts per day.

Starlight March 4th, 2021 2:39 PM

Granted, but now VPPs take 40,000 posts each :)

I wish I was less shy

Roni March 4th, 2021 10:13 PM

granted, but it's flipped the other way now and you're WAY too overconfident. people find you quite annoying lol.

i wish i was on 12% body fat right now

Megan March 6th, 2021 10:59 PM

Granted, but you also develop an uncontrollable craving for unhealthy food.

I wish life to be much easier.

Roni March 7th, 2021 12:39 AM

granted. you are now a rock. you've lost all sense of consciousness and life and just lay motionless there forever, without aim or purpose. can't get any easier than that.

i wish all my notebooks were water proof

PageEmp March 14th, 2021 7:44 AM

Granted. They are waterproof but not fireproof and the material is very sensitive to heat and burns up easily.

I wish nobody were serious.

Squirtlenator March 14th, 2021 7:55 AM

Granted, now the whole world is a joke

I wish the sun was always out

Eleanor March 14th, 2021 8:13 AM

Granted, now you're a vampire

I wish for a PC meetup irl :)

Megan March 14th, 2021 8:56 AM

Granted, but unfortunately you get an appointment that you're not allowed to miss so you can't be there.

I wish for a bottle of water!

ElBurrito March 14th, 2021 8:39 PM

Granted, however all the water inside will evaporate the moment the bottle is opened.

I wish I could understand what animals say when they talk.

Allen303 March 14th, 2021 9:36 PM

granted but you can only listen to them while you are sleeping!
I wish I was captain america!

Roni March 15th, 2021 4:33 AM

granted, but sadly you don't get America's ass. can't have your cake and eat it too y'know?

i wish all English words only had a maximum of 5 letters per word.

Megan March 15th, 2021 4:40 AM

Granted, every word has a maximum of 5 letters. All those words that didn't fit are now taken as alternate meanings of shorter words. That means context now matters more than ever. Unfortunately, it has now become way more difficult to understand what people are trying to say.

I wish for a bigger place to store all my stuff.

Roni March 15th, 2021 8:18 AM

granted, but all your stuff individually double in size as well, so it's as if nothing ever really changed.

i wish the Earth was actually flat

ZeoStar March 15th, 2021 3:20 PM

Granted. The corruption comes from the fact that the flat earthers were right, and we'll never hear the end of it.

I wish eevee had a dragon evolution

Megan March 15th, 2021 9:39 PM

Granted. But it is not cute!

I wish I could uncorrupt any wish I wanted!

PageEmp March 16th, 2021 1:12 AM

Granted. Wishes, however, are powered by a fourth wall. If the fourth wall is fucking destroyed, you can’t uncorrupt any more wishes, and unfortunately, guess what happened.

I wish I had more motivation to continue my Glazed comic.

Roni March 16th, 2021 6:47 AM

granted, but you need to be covered in donut glaze for the motivation to arrive, and it goes away if ever you wash it off.

i wish i had multiple guitars in my collection!

Squirtlenator March 17th, 2021 8:17 AM

Granted but, you can never play any of them

I wish the oceans were clean from pollution

Roni March 17th, 2021 10:12 PM

granted, all that pollution is transferred into lakes and waterfalls instead.

i wish everyone physically stops aging at 25.

Megan March 17th, 2021 10:20 PM

Granted, but they mental capacities decrease even faster now.

I wish for programming to be a lot less of a hassle.

Dave March 18th, 2021 1:17 AM

Granted but your programming skills become useless every second.


I wish that all people be relieved of their all pain and sufferings.

PageEmp March 18th, 2021 3:39 AM

Granted. Instead, the pain and suffereing goes into the earth’s crust instead, and- yeah I think we’ve seen enough destruction of the world outcomes on this thread.

I wish I could create my Glazed comic pages with my mind.

Megan March 18th, 2021 4:27 AM

Granted, but you can't get glaced donuts out of your mind and end up creating pages full of them.
Quote:

Originally Posted by The Killer Red Skull (Post 10316553)
Granted but your programming skills become useless every second.

This isn't a corruption, just an accurate description of reality. D:

I wish I could grab time with my hand.

ZeoStar March 18th, 2021 2:34 PM

Granted, but time is only an illusion created by human perception. What you perceive as time is really emptiness and it causes you to hallucinate.

I wish to see the resurrection of a wooly mammoth

ElBurrito March 18th, 2021 6:00 PM

Granted, but it gets resurrected from within you à la Alien Chestburster style. So you do get to see it, but not for long.

I wish I had three more wishes.

Roni March 18th, 2021 7:12 PM

granted, but you need to speak in perfect Cantonese to have them granted without corruption.

i wish there weren't so many Squirtles in FG :p

Squirtlenator March 19th, 2021 10:33 AM

Granted, now we leveled up and the FG has an abundance of Wartortles

I wish to win 'Last one that posts'

ZeoStar March 19th, 2021 1:24 PM

Granted, you "win" but it's only for 10 minutes. Tsutarja unlocks the thread and takes your victory, then relocks it.

I wish The Beatles had reunited before the passing of Lennon.

Squirtlenator March 20th, 2021 7:23 AM

Granted but, they don't sound nearly as good as before

I wish that every day was a good day

ElBurrito March 20th, 2021 11:53 AM

Granted, but the definitions of good and bad switch.

I wish every pokémon was fused with a Squirtle.

Squirtlenator March 24th, 2021 12:40 PM

Granted but, now there's no more Squirtles in the Pokemon universe because they have all been fused with another mon

I wish for a pot of gold

ElBurrito March 24th, 2021 3:56 PM

Granted, but neither the pot nor the gold can be moved from it's location.

I wish I never needed to buy new shoes.

Squirtlenator March 24th, 2021 4:23 PM

Granted but, all of your other clothes need to be replaced on a more regular basis

I wish money grew on trees


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