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Old March 24th, 2008 (7:19 AM).
Minos Yewman Minos Yewman is offline
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    Join Date: Dec 2007
    Posts: 141
    That chapter was good too, I liked the mob chase lots and I also like it how all the different pokémon have their own personality. However there are 48 shadow pokemon and plusle so if they are each going to have a unique personality, it could get confusing.
    The only mistake I spotted was this:

    Quote:
    encountered it for a while, as he had been with Team Snagem for a while
    You used 'for a while' twice in a short sentance. This doesn't sound good. Try something like:

    Quote:
    encountered it for a while, as he had been with Team Snagem until recently
    Other than that, very good! Keep it up!
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