Galactic Blues (Drabble)
View Single Post
March 7th, 2009 (3:27 PM).
Do the Wess dance!
Central Coast - Australia
Heh, not bad. Got a laugh out of me, that. Now I'm wondering what 'wrong item' they actually did get... and what flavour of yogurt Cyrus wanted as well. XD
However, I'd say that maybe the punchline could have had more set up - some more build-up to make it seem more that Jupitar and Mars had messed up something more serious and all. Would have possibly added a bit more for the punchline then, methinks, but otherwise not bad at all - short but sweet. And everyone knows a successful criminal team needs their yogurt!
Back by popular demand. And in red!
A Change of the Season
The Retelling of Pokémon Colosseum
Joined Mar 2008
View Public Profile
Send a private message to bobandbill
Find all posts by bobandbill
Find threads started by bobandbill
Ignore Posts by bobandbill