Let's Play Pokemon Fire Red
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May 31st, 2010 (3:14 PM).
Descendant of the Inchlings
Okay, two to one Bulbasaur, and I named it Caligula, because that is an awesome name.
Hell yeah, something to poison people with. This should be fun.
Named after something I want to avoid being, thank you very much.
Oh, please don't tell me...
You son of a *****! I'll kill you even more painfully!
Heh, so you want to die already, eh? Okay, let's fight, boy!
Blue: You do realize that we're about the same age, right?
Red: Like I care, all I want to do is to remove you from the equation.
Oak: What's going on over there?
This should be easy enough.
WHAT!? How!? How could I have lost to this fool!?
Blue: You kept telling me what you were going to do, and laughing.
Red: ... Shut up.
No, I'll kill you!
Wait, what? That's disgusting.
Blue: Shut up, weirdo.
(Blue walks out)
Looks like I'm going to have some trouble with this after all. Oh well, as long as I get the Master Ball, I'll get what I want. Those fools had better not betray me.
Heh, this looks like it'll be an easy route to conquer.
Give me your stuff, now! Or will we have to get deadly?
Clerk: D-don't hurt me! T-take it!
A POTION!? That's all you have!? Graaaah! You piss me off too much. Be fortunate I'm so merciful.
Heh, a Pidgey? This should be e-
What the hell!? I almost lost to one of the weakest pokemon in the region!? Arceus damn it! What the hell!?
Finally, I made it to Viridian. It looks like my luck is turning for the better, if I must say so myself. Now, let's scout around for targets.
Pokemon Center: Place where many beginners rest. Good target.
Damn, can't get to the gym. I'll kill you, old man.
Anyway, now that I was so rudely interrupted, the Pokemon Gym: Abandoned, so I don't think it'll be a good target.
What? Yes, but I'm only here to buy-
You mean the guy who is going slowly mad? Yeah, I know him, but I'm here to buy-
What!? No! Why the hell should I?
When I get pokemon team full, I will kill you. I will kill you so fast.
Damn lazy clerk.
Oh my god! That Pidgey nest will PAY! Tonight, they will all die!
Surprisingly happy, I think.
Well, despite wanting to conquer the world, I do treat my pokemon well. A willing ally is a helpful ally.
Don't praise me, you insane old man. It won't come out to anything.
I'm not a dog, but I do. This is the last errand I'm running for you.
You are a lazy man. I despise you.
Red: Wha!? Where did you come from!?
Blue: I'm so cool, I can teleport.
Oh Arceus, please tell me that it won't be utterly stupid.
Blue: Obviously you don't know my grandpa, then.
You didn't invent the thing! You stole it and said you did!
Blue: Poor Professor Pine. I remember burying her body, too.
We know that! It's common knowledge!
Please don't tell me I'll have to catch a bunch of pokemon.
Hell no! My funds go to a completely separate thing!
The present isn't enough to make me do it.
WE ALREADY HAVE THAT! It's called BULBAPEDIA!
Right. Anyway, I'm getting out of here before you cretins make me even stupider.
And you pigs revere him as some sort of god.
What told you that? Your medicade bill, or your osteoperosis? Face it, you'll be dead in three years if I don't do anything.
Hmm... NO! I have my own dreams to fulfill!
Blue: Don't bother, he doesn't go online... anyway!
I know I won't be. I don't want to be.
Wow, he sure can teleport.
Hope you like it. Update 3 will come soon.
Joined Feb 2008
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