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Old October 4th, 2012 (9:37 AM).
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IceFyr1928 IceFyr1928 is offline
Is now DeathofShadows
     
    Join Date: Aug 2012
    Location: Upper Canterlot, Equestria
    Gender: Male
    Nature: Calm
    Posts: 758
    Okay, there are a few problems here. First of all, you need to put a journey into pre-Plasma Unova, and then have him trapped there. If his intention is to join plasma, the you need to explain that in more detail. Pretty much, add more to the history section. And fix your grammar. "He is a the fool?" I don't think that you're Italian...
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