Thread: [Pokémon] Closed Door
View Single Post
Old June 16th, 2013 (10:26 PM).
Astinus's Avatar
Astinus Astinus is offline
Remember NovEnder
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Connecticut, USA
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,936
Originally Posted by bobandbill View Post
This was a neat concept and well explored, I felt, Astinus. I think it'll work well as a set up of your AU.
Aw, thanks! That's reassuring to hear. There are still some finer details I have to figure out, but the basis of the world is there.

Damn that Gary Oak!
Gary Oak keeps demanding that I write about him. How can I deny him?

I agree in part with dudebot's point about her reaction to visiting his room and thinking about his death. I feel that a bit more emotion could have been had there, but I do agree that the dull pain feeling makes sense if it's a good year and so after, and I don't think a sliding down the wall and crying reaction is quite the extent to reach (and perhaps a bit too cliché?). It could also take away from the flashbacks/thoughts about Ash as well, in a way. My thoughts anyways, each to their own I suppose.
I will admit that I was focusing more on Delia's thoughts over her emotions in this. And yeah, an excuse for that is that this takes place a year-and-a-half since Ash died. But as I told dudebot, I'll keep this in mind when I revisit this story to see how it will fit as part of a larger chapter.

I don't recall too much about the anime, but I think that Ash hadn't know what Ho-oh was when he saw it? Although this can be ignored in favour of this being an AU story, of course.
I just tossed that bit of canon right out the window!

Actually, the way I have it, knowledge about everything up to Generation 5 is well-known. It just seems really odd to have characters not know what some species of Pokemon are. I do have one character who was raised on stories of all the legendaries (especially Ho-Oh) and prays to Uxie, even though the character is from Hoenn. It just makes more sense than characters from Kanto only knowing Kanto Pokemon or some such.

And yes, AU. :D

Cheers for the review!

Now nobody, nobody, nobody, nobody speaks my name
I'm just another blister in the mouth of shame
A bug in Ender's Game

Reply With Quote