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Old July 28th, 2013 (6:34 AM).
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Kanzler Kanzler is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Toronto
Gender: Male
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Posts: 5,924
I'm not saying it isn't, just that knowing and understanding that it is a choice doesn't get us much further from square one. Obviously, reminding a person who feels helpless that it is their responsibility and their choice doesn't really help them get off their feet - what needs to happen is to shift their attention away from the negative emotion. You might accuse my idea as helping them shirk their responsibility, but from my experience self-efficacy is tops when it comes to building motivation and building action. Sure, some could call it self-deception (although I wouldn't say that), but for me this is one of the situations in which the consequences justify all the little white lies that might be said along the way, as well as refusing to address the issue in speech as one of "personal responsibility" until that person becomes emotionally able to embrace that idea - which involves a lot of confidence-building before any talk of "personal responsibility".
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