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  #776    
Old August 29th, 2011 (9:11 PM).
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I have no clue, I've never been in a relationship. lol

I'd say there are definitely less available choices out there, and there's no way of really knowing if they are Gay or not... and if you can't tell, then it's really risky to actually ask someone outright, so that narrows your choices down to about... zero.

Yeah, it's harder.

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  #777    
Old August 29th, 2011 (9:56 PM).
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Does anyone else think that it is more difficult for LGBT people to date? And that there are more strains in relationships than in heterosexual relationships generally?

The T among us LGBTers have it ever more rough in terms of dating. Unless one of us reaches for one of the far ends of the traditional gender binary (meaning aiming to look quite masculine or feminine) and is able to look "normal" doing it then huge numbers of people discount us outright.

With dating, and I can't say I have a LOT of experience, it's got all the social stigmas you expect plus its own unique issues that not many people have ever had to face, namely reexamining their own sexuality.
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  #778    
Old August 29th, 2011 (10:52 PM).
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    Does anyone else think that it is more difficult for LGBT people to date? And that there are more strains in relationships than in heterosexual relationships generally?

    Well, considering I've never dated a guy I can't provide much insight. However, I do think it is more difficult for LGBT people to date because there are far fewer of us, it can be difficult to find a partner & also, you aren't given as broad a range of people to date (based on numbers) as you would get if you were hetero.

    With regards to strains, both hetero and homo relationships face issues. I'd say LGBT people face more in terms of social stigma & trying to feel comfortable with each other. Though, hetero people have to worry about unwanted pregnancy lol -- I'm glad that won't be an issue for me ;D.
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      #779    
    Old August 30th, 2011 (7:29 AM).
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    I'm obviously not a firsthand source, but from what I gather:

    -When finding a partner, one has to be sure that the person is LGBT before they even attempt to see if they are interested in them. Finding that out can be difficult and awkward.
    -Going on dates can be problematic because ignorant people can harass you.
      #780    
    Old August 30th, 2011 (7:36 AM).
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    Does anyone else think that it is more difficult for LGBT people to date? And that there are more strains in relationships than in heterosexual relationships generally?

    It's definitely more difficult at least for them to ask someone out. It can be very difficult to tell whether a person is straight, gay, or bi. Also, with the actions of some people who are homophobic, it could actually be a danger to the person to ask a straight person out, thinking he or she is gay. I actually have experience of the opposite nature, asking a girl out and thus finding out she's a lesbian. Yes, that did happen to me once. Also, with people who are transgender, they would have to tell the person early on that they are transgender and what they are in regards to whether they have had extensive surgery to make them as male/female as possible, or whether or not they plan to have it done. That way, if the person they're with doesn't accept them, they don't get hurt as bad, or if they do accept them, they know they've found someone good.

    As far as strains, I would think a homosexual relationship has the same strains as a heterosexual relationship. Things like money, stress, family, and everything else you can think would come into play in both a homosexual and heterosexual relationship. The only other thing I can think of with a homosexual relationship is people seeing their public displays of affection (holding hands, kissing, etc.) and not being accepting of it.
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    Old August 30th, 2011 (12:48 PM).
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by deoxys121 View Post
    Does anyone else think that it is more difficult for LGBT people to date? And that there are more strains in relationships than in heterosexual relationships generally?

    It's definitely more difficult at least for them to ask someone out. It can be very difficult to tell whether a person is straight, gay, or bi. Also, with the actions of some people who are homophobic, it could actually be a danger to the person to ask a straight person out, thinking he or she is gay.
    Yeah, you really can't just ask people outright, and a lot of the time, there's really no other way to find out.

    Yesterday, I met this really hot guy working at a game store here, but I have no way of knowing if he's gay, and I'm definitely not going to ask. If he's not, he'd probably kill me, considering what most people are like where I live. *sadface*
      #782    
    Old August 31st, 2011 (3:39 AM).
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    I don't really have an answer to that question that can expand on what has already been said, but I do have another question:

    In straight relationships, it's generally accepted that the man will propose. In a homosexual relationship, there are either two men or no men at all. Would you rather be the one to propose, or would you prefer to be proposed to?
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      #783    
    Old August 31st, 2011 (11:01 AM).
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    My gay friend tells me that it's actually pretty easy for him to date (living around the San Francisco area like he does), but that it's very hard to find a lasting relationship and that's why he doesn't want to date anymore.

    Marriage doesn't mean too much to me, but since I'm a shy person and I like nice surprises I'd say I'd rather have someone else do the proposing if it ever came to that. I'd hope that with any couple no one would feel they had to do something one way just cause they were a girl or a guy.
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      #784    
    Old August 31st, 2011 (12:43 PM).
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    Update for those interested in

    H.R. 10
    Preserving Freedom Of Speech Act

    BILL SUMMARY:
    Unless remarks offensive to demographic groups are specifically intended to gravely offend, intimidate, harass, or belittle specific individual(s), such remarks are not considered harassment or hate speech under the campus Code of Conduct.

    PASSED A.S. HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES ON 8/24/2011
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    PASSED A.S. SENATE ON 8/31/2011, CLOTURE INVOKED
    AYES: 15 (for cloture and passage)
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    This pretty much just eases up campus "hate speech" rules.
      #785    
    Old August 31st, 2011 (1:27 PM).
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
    My gay friend tells me that it's actually pretty easy for him to date (living around the San Francisco area like he does), but that it's very hard to find a lasting relationship and that's why he doesn't want to date anymore.
    Meh, hopefully I don't have trouble with that. I really wouldn't want anything but a long term relationship.
      #786    
    Old August 31st, 2011 (8:35 PM).
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
      In straight relationships, it's generally accepted that the man will propose. In a homosexual relationship, there are either two men or no men at all. Would you rather be the one to propose, or would you prefer to be proposed to?
      Depending on the person, and how open-minded they are (I know a homosexual who's actually very close-minded despite... well, being homosexual, which kind of takes some open-mindedness), I would either be the one to propose (making some convoluted proposal or something that makes it all the more entertaining), or the one being proposed to (likely something simple, which I'm almost completely incapable of because my own mind likes to wander if I don't keep an eye on it ).
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        #787    
      Old September 1st, 2011 (7:40 AM). Edited September 1st, 2011 by -ty-.
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        In straight relationships, it's generally accepted that the man will propose. In a homosexual relationship, there are either two men or no men at all. Would you rather be the one to propose, or would you prefer to be proposed to?


        My boyfriend is assertive in a good way; although this is a fairly new relationship, if all works out, I know that he will be the one to propose as I would also prefer. It is interesting that in some gay couples there are not clear gender-like roles in the relationship, and in others there are very distinct ones. I would say that we fall somewhere in the middle leaning toward having some gender-like roles.

        Quote:
        Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
        Meh, hopefully I don't have trouble with that. I really wouldn't want anything but a long term relationship.
        That's great; just don't let ANYONE discourage you. I remember quite a few guys that kept trying to coerce me into believing that GLBT relationships are not lasting and that I'd might as well just "have fun". Yeah, I found out that my ex of two years had cheated on me several times and even knocked up a girl! So although that is discouraging, and you may also have similar discouraging relationships as I have seen with MANY other gay men with their own relationships in the past. Too many of us give up, I just wanted to let you know, because there are alot of ***holes out there that try to make you think otherwise. Wow, that was a huge ramble, lol. Sorry about that
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          #788    
        Old September 1st, 2011 (8:15 AM).
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        Quote:
        Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
        I don't really have an answer to that question that can expand on what has already been said, but I do have another question:
        Quote:
        Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post

        In straight relationships, it's generally accepted that the man will propose. In a homosexual relationship, there are either two men or no men at all. Would you rather be the one to propose, or would you prefer to be proposed to?
        I've thought about this, and honestly, I have no idea how it will work out for me.

        At this rate, we'll end up proposing to each other at the same time.

        *Kneels down* "Marry me?"

        "....I was just about to do that."

        "What?"

        "Yeah, didn't all my speeches about you and love tip you off?"

        "Didn't the dinner on the eiffel tower tip you off?"

        "Come on, you had to notice I was holding a Four Carat diamond ring in my hand this entire time."

        "What about the Sapphire and Ruby ring I put in your champagne glass?"

        "That was a ring? I thought I got some grape pulp or something."

        "What do you mean 'Grape Pulp?' It was a ring with a rocks on it!"

        "They go down feeling the same!"

        But.... when the time comes, if I feel I'm the one who wants to pop the question, I will. I wouldn't mind if I got proposed to, though.
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          #789    
        Old September 1st, 2011 (12:18 PM). Edited September 1st, 2011 by wcdaily.
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          Today at my school, in my art class the students were having mixed conversations about glee and techno music, then some girl was saying her older brother still watches glee and listens to techno music, then she said "You can easily tell a gay guy by the music they listen to." This made me really mad, even though I didn't really show it at the time, I'm pansexual and I don't listen to techno or glee. So how do you guys feel about the constant stereotypes pointed towards members of the lgbt community?
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            #790    
          Old September 1st, 2011 (12:45 PM). Edited September 1st, 2011 by Steven.
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by wcdaily View Post
          Today at my school, in my art class the students were having mixed conversations about glee and techno music, then some girl was saying her older brother still watches glee and listens to techno music, then she said "You can easily tell a gay guy by the music they listen to." This made me really mad, even though I didn't really show it at the time, I'm pansexual and I don't listen to techno or glee. So how do you guys feel about the constant stereotypes pointed towards members of the lgbt community?
          Glee is a show, not a band. Although you can still listen to it, I get the vibe you didn't know. :x

          And you love Glee. Every not-straight person does. You just don't realize it yet >:o
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            #791    
          Old September 1st, 2011 (12:47 PM).
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          I hate stereotypes. I wish anyone who wasn't sure about what they thought would just ask instead of assuming.

          What bothers me more though is when people who should know better fall for stereotypes. Like my friend who's gay. He listens to techno and watches Glee, but of course he has other music he listens to like Lady Gaga. Okay, bad example. Anyway, he has said once or twice that he thinks that being gay makes him more attracted to certain kinds of music just like all the stereotypes say. I'm not sure he's kidding though. If I confront him about it and say that he's joking he kinda gets offended. I think he might half believe it.
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            #792    
          Old September 1st, 2011 (1:10 PM).
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            Quote:
            Originally Posted by Landorus View Post
            b

            Glee is a show, not a band. Although you can still listen to it, I get the vibe you didn't know. :x

            And you love Glee. Every not-straight person does. You just don't realize it yet >:o
            Well I never really seen it, or know what it is about, so I wouldn't really know, so I just say I don't listen or watched it, because I haven't.
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              #793    
            Old September 1st, 2011 (5:24 PM).
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                #794    
              Old September 1st, 2011 (6:22 PM). Edited September 1st, 2011 by Alice.
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              Quote:
              Originally Posted by wcdaily View Post
              Today at my school, in my art class the students were having mixed conversations about glee and techno music, then some girl was saying her older brother still watches glee and listens to techno music, then she said "You can easily tell a gay guy by the music they listen to." This made me really mad, even though I didn't really show it at the time, I'm pansexual and I don't listen to techno or glee. So how do you guys feel about the constant stereotypes pointed towards members of the lgbt community?
              Here's a few of my favorite songs.
              Spoiler:



              I could be wrong, but it doesn't sound like techno to me.

              Oh, and I hate Glee. :)
              (Don't kill me. D:)
                #795    
              Old September 1st, 2011 (9:16 PM).
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              Quote:
              Originally Posted by wcdaily View Post
              So how do you guys feel about the constant stereotypes pointed towards members of the lgbt community?
              Bleh. Regardless of a person's sexual orientation, they have likes. Just because someone likes Lady Gaga or Glee and happens to be homosexual, it doesn't mean they like those things because they're homosexual.

              Maybe it's an exposure thing. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have gotten into Gaga that quickly if my GSA didn't introduce me to her. If something becomes popular in a particular subculture, you can bet people within that subculture who haven't been exposed yet and are curious are going to check it out.

              It's like "geeks" with Minecraft. The "geeks" don't like Minecraft because they're "geeks," they like Minecraft because it's freaking Minecraft. <3 However, they were possibly introduced to Minecraft because they were a "geek" and were informed about it by fellows "geeks."

              If someone made a video that had a lot of Asian fans, someone might spread the news that "Asians love this video!" Curious, more Asian people would look at the video to see what the fuss is about.

              My point is, if you're in a specific group where something becomes popular amongst it, you can be introduced by the group, but you'll judge it on your own merits. (If you're not a super-conformist.)

              So that's how stereotypes like what you said stem from, and that's just stupidity dribbling from someone's mouth because they're making a stupid assumption in attempt to make a joke, which in turn wasn't really that funny.
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                #796    
              Old September 2nd, 2011 (4:57 AM).
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              Gay stereotyping, or any stereotyping for that matter, is an example of the post hoc fallacy. For those of you who don't know what that is (I only learned about it during an ill-advised attempt at taking an economics class lol), it's the false assumption that because B happened after A, A therefore caused B.

              In essence, what I'm saying is the same as what everyone else is saying: Just because someone is gay and subsequently likes Glee, it doesn't mean the fact that he/she is gay caused them to like Glee.

              /ohlookatmeitalkallpretentiouslol

              Also, I will post some gay news tomorrow. I was going to do it now since it's been like a week, but nine-hour shifts at work tend to kill your energy levels
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                #797    
              Old September 2nd, 2011 (9:20 AM).
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              I seem to have some spare energy so here are some news articles to chew on while SR gets some rest.
              I gotta say, I'm quite saddened by some of what I read in the first article. I mean, Dancing With The Stars isn't at all important in the great scheme of things, but I thought people would be better than this.

              And the Prop-8 supporting Mormon church seems to be on the PR offensive.
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                #798    
              Old September 2nd, 2011 (9:23 AM). Edited September 3rd, 2011 by Renii.
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                Quote:
                Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
                Does anyone else think that it is more difficult for LGBT people to date? And that there are more strains in relationships than in heterosexual relationships generally?
                Given the fact that the only gay people I know are on PC and Reddit, I'd say yes.

                Quote:
                Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
                In straight relationships, it's generally accepted that the man will propose. In a homosexual relationship, there are either two men or no men at all. Would you rather be the one to propose, or would you prefer to be proposed to?
                I would most definitely like to be proposed to. I will be the emotionally dependent person in a relationship, so I guess...

                Oh and I like Glee (the music, the storyline is sooo weird ) I've recently started liking Gaga.
                What about MLP?
                  #799    
                Old September 2nd, 2011 (10:09 AM).
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                What about MLP?
                Okay, you got me there... I love MLP. lol
                  #800    
                Old September 2nd, 2011 (11:38 AM).
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                Hey! I'm Alexial, and I would love to join this club and show my support! :3

                I'm bisexual, currently in a heterosexual relationship, which I am very happy with. I guess, I'm posting here to ask for advice too (and change the topic apparently ;o; sorry about that), because I've recently had problems with my sexual identity. I apologize if this question has been asked before, I looked to make sure, but there's never any harm in saying sorry in advanced xD;

                So, Bisexuals - Would you "change" your sexual orientation according to your relationship if there were a guarantee that it will last?

                Other Sexual Identities - What about you? Hypothetically, if you were Bisexual and in a Straight/Otherwise relationship, would you tell people that you were bisexual despite that?


                Let me just say, I have always identified as Bisexual. But now that my current relationship is getting serious, I'm beginning to question whether or not it would benefit anyone to tell them (my partner already knows). I will always be me, and I'm a very big advocate of being honest to myself. And it is something that I will always know, like about myself, and be comfortable with. But, if I know for a fact that someone will disapprove, and by all appearances I'm "straight", should I bother telling them in the first place?

                I also want to say, I think this is an amazing club and you're doing a wonderful thing here. I've especially enjoyed how there has been a big emphasis on education and awareness, which is fundamental to the cause at its essence. I'm proud to be a part of something like this, and I'm glad everyone has made it such a safe and inviting environment. No matter what anyone says, you should all be very proud of what you're doing.
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