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  #4026    
Old July 21st, 2013 (8:18 PM).
Esper's Avatar
Esper Esper is offline
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: California
Posts: 10,761
So I just attended my first gay wedding. Sort of.

A sort of friend from several years ago got married a few years ago, but not where it was legal, and she just moved back to California earlier this year, and since it's legal now in California they're now legally married. They had an impromptu party a few hours from where I am and it seemed like a good idea so I went. It was nice. Nothing that looked like a wedding, just people hanging around and eating barbecue.
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  #4027    
Old July 21st, 2013 (10:21 PM).
Kanzler's Avatar
Kanzler Kanzler is offline
naughty biscotti
 
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Out of curiosity, was it a barbeque or was it a grill? Slow-cooked low heat or fast-cooked high heat? :P I just learned this the other day, Canadians get it wrong all the time. Sorry I'm excited at applying newly-learned knowledge XD
  #4028    
Old July 22nd, 2013 (10:43 AM).
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Esper Esper is offline
 
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I don't really know much about barbecue. All the food was vegan and gluten-free (lots of veggies and fruits on skewers) because one of them is vegetarian (and knows some vegans) and the other is gluten intolerant. That might determine how you should cook it. I dunno. I'm a terrible cook myself.

Oh, and um, here's a RAINBOW to make sure my post is still on topic.
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  #4029    
Old July 22nd, 2013 (11:53 AM).
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Kano Shuuya Kano Shuuya is offline
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I'd like to attend a gay wedding, unfortunately this is Kansas, and it's not legal here. Which is ironic considering that everyone that I know (mostly) fits into one LGBT category or another. Even if we held a celebration, Westboro would probably show up, like they do to everything else around here. I hate it.
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  #4030    
Old July 22nd, 2013 (12:35 PM).
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Sanguine Sanguine is offline
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I've attended a gay wedding, and it was quite fun! They tried more to have fun than make things too serious.

The food was pretty all over the place though, and I ended up with toast points (which I didn't know were a thing) and oysters, which are disgusting ;~;
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  #4031    
Old July 23rd, 2013 (6:18 AM).
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Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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I've always wondered what they say at the end of a gay wedding...

"I now pronounce you.... men"
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  #4032    
Old July 23rd, 2013 (9:51 AM).
Kiriyuuki Kasuna's Avatar
Kiriyuuki Kasuna Kiriyuuki Kasuna is offline
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I've always wondered that too....

Also, I've yet to attend a gay wedding, I would like to see how it is and all--men don't throw those flowers in a bunch right? :s
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  #4033    
Old July 23rd, 2013 (12:25 PM).
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Esper Esper is offline
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
I've always wondered what they say at the end of a gay wedding...

"I now pronounce you.... men"
"I now pronounce you married."

Which, really, is how it should be for everyone, amirite? Your gender doesn't matter. Your love does.
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  #4034    
Old July 23rd, 2013 (1:59 PM).
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Songbird Songbird is offline
Is Unicorn a good girl?
     
    Join Date: Jul 2013
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    • "I now pronounce you husbands."
    • "I now pronounce you wives."
    • "I now pronounce you human beings in a federally-recognized life partnership, in which you are eligible to receive benefits based on your relationship with each other."
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      #4035    
    Old July 27th, 2013 (3:18 PM).
    Rai's Avatar
    Rai Rai is offline
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      Maybe something as simple as "I now pronounce you married"? Idk. I never really thought about it before, but now I am wondering what exactly they would say.

      I was wondering if anyone here as heard Same Love by Macklemore? It is an amazing song about gay rights and it is all over the radio! The song apparently just went platinum. I think it is great that a song that would have been controversial not too long ago is now a hit. It shows how far we've come. If you haven't heard it, I suggest you listen to it.
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        #4036    
      Old July 27th, 2013 (10:26 PM).
      Kanzler's Avatar
      Kanzler Kanzler is offline
      naughty biscotti
       
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      Yes. I went to the youtubes thanks to you, and wooooow. It was absolutely amazing!! Macklemore is an absolute wordsmith and it was awesome hearing him express his message ... probably much much better than any of us here XD.
        #4037    
      Old July 28th, 2013 (8:03 AM).
      Esper's Avatar
      Esper Esper is offline
       
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      My friend told me about this song. It's good. I'm not much of a rap fan, but I liked it. Interesting that it's a white rapper though. I'm guessing there's too much stigma for a lot of black rappers to do something similar. Maybe that's already happened though, I wouldn't know.
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        #4038    
      Old July 28th, 2013 (10:05 AM).
      Kanzler's Avatar
      Kanzler Kanzler is offline
      naughty biscotti
       
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      I haven't heard a lot of his music, but from what I've seen, he hits hard at the non-mainstream side of things, so that just where he's coming from. There are black rappers that get at the non-mainstream topics/attitudes as well. I don't feel that there's any real stigma for black rappers. If they want to be mainstream, sure - but that's the same for fitting into any group, you have to go with the flow.
        #4039    
      Old July 29th, 2013 (12:08 AM).
      Phantom's Avatar
      Phantom Phantom is offline
      Uh, I didn't do it
       
      Join Date: Aug 2011
      Location: Minnesota
      Age: 27
      Gender: Female
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      Have you guys heard "All-American Boy" yet? It's an openly gay song about a guy having a crush on another guy.

      Lyrics for those that don't want to watch the vid, which you should do...:

      Spoiler:

      Ripped jeans, only drinks whiskey,
      I find him by the fire while his girl was getting frisky.
      Oh, I say we go this road tonight

      He smiles, his arms around her,
      But his eyes are holding me, just a captive to his wonder.
      Oh, I say we go this road tonight

      Now I know that that's your girl, I mean no disrespect,
      The way that shirt hugs your chest boy, I just won't forget.
      I'll be sittin here, drinking my whiskey.
      I won't say goodnight unless I think ya might miss me.

      Be my all-american boy tonight,
      Where everyday's the Fourth of july,
      And it's alright, alright.
      And we can keep this up till the morning light.
      And you can hold me deep in your eyes.
      And it's alright, alright.
      Be my, be my,
      My All-American boy.

      Ripped jeans, tight shirt,
      He lights a cigarette, you know I'm glad that she can't stand it.
      Oh, I drink the moonlight from his eyes

      Now hold there, just a moment,
      I want to take this in now, we don't need no photo of it, no.
      We should go this road tonight.

      Now I know that that's your girl, and I don't give a damn.
      She's been cussin' and cryin', she don't know what she has.
      So I'll be sittin here, tryin' hold down my whiskey,
      You tell your girl good night cause somebody'd like to kiss me, ohh.

      Be my all-american boy tonight.
      Where everyday's the Fourth of july.
      And it's alright, alright.
      And we can keep this up till the morning light.
      And you can hold me deep in your eyes.
      And it's alright, alright.
      Be my, be my,
      My All-American boy.

      Of all the girls and boys to look my way,
      Ain't no body ever hit me this way.
      So won't you come back with me,
      And lay with me a while.

      I'm gonna wrestle you out of them clothes,
      Leave that beautiful body exposed,
      And you can have my heart and my soul and my body...

      Just be mine.

      Be my All-American boy tonight.
      Baby you light my fire!
      I'll make you feel alright, alright!

      And we can keep this up till the morning light.
      And you can hold me deep in your eyes.
      And it's alright, alright!
      Be my, be my
      Just, be my, be my
      My all-american boy


      The video's pretty beautiful, and so is the the singer/writer's story. I suggest you look him up.
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        #4040    
      Old July 29th, 2013 (12:19 AM).
      Kanzler's Avatar
      Kanzler Kanzler is offline
      naughty biscotti
       
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      It made me feel a bit queasy haha. It's unbearably sappy and we all knew it wouldn't end well X'D Also, incredible amounts of abs.

      MOAR MUSIC!
        #4041    
      Old July 29th, 2013 (12:31 AM).
      Moist's Avatar
      Moist Moist is offline
      other in a month When you,
         
        Join Date: Jan 2013
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        Out to 4 people (was 2 before today) :DDDDD
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          #4042    
        Old July 29th, 2013 (12:48 AM).
        New Eden's Avatar
        New Eden New Eden is offline
        Ascension to heaven
         
        Join Date: Jul 2013
        Location: My Nevereverland
        Age: 24
        Gender: Female
        Nature: Bashful
        Posts: 406
        Quote:
        Originally Posted by GreatTornado View Post
        Out to 4 people (was 2 before today) :DDDDD
        *High-fives*

        Reminds me that I might be next in line soon enough. I could anticipate to begin transition in a matter of two months the way things are going. My boss is a very mellow dude, but it should be an interesting (and awkward) situation either way.
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          #4043    
        Old July 29th, 2013 (2:44 AM).
        Phantom's Avatar
        Phantom Phantom is offline
        Uh, I didn't do it
         
        Join Date: Aug 2011
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        Quote:
        Originally Posted by BlahISuck View Post
        It made me feel a bit queasy haha. It's unbearably sappy and we all knew it wouldn't end well X'D Also, incredible amounts of abs.
        Well, he's not a signed singer. He maxed out his credit card and made it on his own. It's gonna be a bit cheap-ish, but it's pretty good considering.
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          #4044    
        Old July 29th, 2013 (5:31 AM).
        Nine Inch Nails Nine Inch Nails is offline
        ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
           
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          Might as well post in this thread to tie any loose ends that may have been caused by my vehement protectiveness over such an issue... oh, and sorry for throwing this off-topic. Apologies.

          I am a double package. My sexual orientation is bisexual and I'm transgender: I'm biologically male (*shakes fist*) but identify as female, and I have felt this way for over five years (and looking back, I was exhibiting signs of some sort of 'deviation' from extreme youth). I started screaming to the world that I was a girl when I was around 10 years old, and I received overwhelmingly negative reception from my parents (who cited 'puberty blues' or whatever) and from my academic peers (who considered me a complete freak). I was deeply hurt by this reaction and locked myself back in the closet at the end of the year and just hoped everything would die down and everybody would forget about it. To my happiness (and surprise), nobody seemed to remember the next year; my peers forgot all about it and my parents never mentioned it again. Of course, inwardly, I perceived myself as female more strongly than I ever had before.

          In Year 7 (when I was around 12 years old), I attempted to come out again, this time to my parents. Unfortunately, a note addressed to my mother was intercepted by my father and I was taken to his office where I was calmly and coolly (but firmly) told off about 'scaring' and 'upsetting' my family's balance with such 'rubbish' and that it was all 'part of a phase'. Clearly, my father had forgotten about my vehement assertions a few years back, but I resolved to just throw myself as far into the closet as possible; I was still scarred from Year 5 and I did not want the same -- or a worse -- reaction from my parents and peers who wouldn't have known me from Adam. I feel I did a good job of covering up my inward identification as the opposite gender (I still identified as female, of course), but for a multitude of other reasons I was unable to fit in this school (which, I should mention, was an Anglican single-sex school) so I decided to transfer... to a Roman Catholic single-sex school.

          In Year 8, I decided that to start afresh, I would attempt to close off everything relevant to my transsexualism. It was extremely painful to do so, and I spiralled deeper down a masculine pattern of behaviour purely to appease other students which disgusted me whenever I thought back on what I had done during the day. In September 2012, I woke up to myself and realised that what I was doing was in no way true to myself and was instead a complete perversion of what I had been attempting to do for myself all those years before. I reneged on all behavioural changes I had made, as they were in no way reflections of who I truly was, and I resumed openly inwardly identifying as female (not that the feeling had ever fully gone away) and behaving in the effeminate manner that I had been doing for so many years beforehand.

          In February 2013, with the encouragement of certain Internet figureheads, I began identifying as female on the Internet (I had never done this before: I was worried about legal issues that would confront me if I identified as female on the Internet but with the help of this figurehead I put these beliefs to bed) and now identify as female everywhere I feasibly can. I attempted to come out earlier this year by writing a heartfelt, emotional and angry 600-word letter to my parents which was intercepted by my mother and quickly put to rest in an effort to quell any 'resurgences' of previous trends, so at least somebody in my family remembers things. However, I have a plan up my sleeve.

          In order to iron out issues with socialising that I have in real life (I suffer from Asperger's Syndrome which, naturally, greatly impedes my ability to engage in and begin conversations) I am attempting to organise sessions with a counsellor. Through this counsellor, I intend to finally put to rest the constant issues I have had in real life and come out in a completely different manner: I intend to spill out everything I have said here and more to this counsellor and finally have the satisfaction of having come out to somebody who will not scathingly judge me in real life. I am very close to getting these sessions with this counsellor, and I am absolutely ecstatic to quell my demons and come out to somebody; anybody. Of course, as a consequence of this, my parents will be told too -- by the counsellor -- and I will already have somebody backing me prior to finally attempting to reason with my parents who have rejected my pleas so many times before.
            #4045    
          Old July 29th, 2013 (1:19 PM).
          XIII's Avatar
          XIII XIII is offline
          don't you remember?
           
          Join Date: May 2011
          Age: 19
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Nine Inch Nails View Post
          Might as well post in this thread to tie any loose ends that may have been caused by my vehement protectiveness over such an issue... oh, and sorry for throwing this off-topic. Apologies.

          I am a double package. My sexual orientation is bisexual and I'm transgender: I'm biologically male (*shakes fist*) but identify as female, and I have felt this way for over five years (and looking back, I was exhibiting signs of some sort of 'deviation' from extreme youth). I started screaming to the world that I was a girl when I was around 10 years old, and I received overwhelmingly negative reception from my parents (who cited 'puberty blues' or whatever) and from my academic peers (who considered me a complete freak). I was deeply hurt by this reaction and locked myself back in the closet at the end of the year and just hoped everything would die down and everybody would forget about it. To my happiness (and surprise), nobody seemed to remember the next year; my peers forgot all about it and my parents never mentioned it again. Of course, inwardly, I perceived myself as female more strongly than I ever had before.

          In Year 7 (when I was around 12 years old), I attempted to come out again, this time to my parents. Unfortunately, a note addressed to my mother was intercepted by my father and I was taken to his office where I was calmly and coolly (but firmly) told off about 'scaring' and 'upsetting' my family's balance with such 'rubbish' and that it was all 'part of a phase'. Clearly, my father had forgotten about my vehement assertions a few years back, but I resolved to just throw myself as far into the closet as possible; I was still scarred from Year 5 and I did not want the same -- or a worse -- reaction from my parents and peers who wouldn't have known me from Adam. I feel I did a good job of covering up my inward identification as the opposite gender (I still identified as female, of course), but for a multitude of other reasons I was unable to fit in this school (which, I should mention, was an Anglican single-sex school) so I decided to transfer... to a Roman Catholic single-sex school.

          In Year 8, I decided that to start afresh, I would attempt to close off everything relevant to my transsexualism. It was extremely painful to do so, and I spiralled deeper down a masculine pattern of behaviour purely to appease other students which disgusted me whenever I thought back on what I had done during the day. In September 2012, I woke up to myself and realised that what I was doing was in no way true to myself and was instead a complete perversion of what I had been attempting to do for myself all those years before. I reneged on all behavioural changes I had made, as they were in no way reflections of who I truly was, and I resumed openly inwardly identifying as female (not that the feeling had ever fully gone away) and behaving in the effeminate manner that I had been doing for so many years beforehand.

          In February 2013, with the encouragement of certain Internet figureheads, I began identifying as female on the Internet (I had never done this before: I was worried about legal issues that would confront me if I identified as female on the Internet but with the help of this figurehead I put these beliefs to bed) and now identify as female everywhere I feasibly can. I attempted to come out earlier this year by writing a heartfelt, emotional and angry 600-word letter to my parents which was intercepted by my mother and quickly put to rest in an effort to quell any 'resurgences' of previous trends, so at least somebody in my family remembers things. However, I have a plan up my sleeve.

          In order to iron out issues with socialising that I have in real life (I suffer from Asperger's Syndrome which, naturally, greatly impedes my ability to engage in and begin conversations) I am attempting to organise sessions with a counsellor. Through this counsellor, I intend to finally put to rest the constant issues I have had in real life and come out in a completely different manner: I intend to spill out everything I have said here and more to this counsellor and finally have the satisfaction of having come out to somebody who will not scathingly judge me in real life. I am very close to getting these sessions with this counsellor, and I am absolutely ecstatic to quell my demons and come out to somebody; anybody. Of course, as a consequence of this, my parents will be told too -- by the counsellor -- and I will already have somebody backing me prior to finally attempting to reason with my parents who have rejected my pleas so many times before.
          I'm glad you've put in such an effort to come out instead of shoving yourself back in the closet. You are a brave person for outing yourself so many times, and I'm ashamed that no one readily accepted you for who you are.

          Just know that we're all here to support you :)

          On another note, sorry I've been gone so long guys. I've been in Maui!

          Have a picture of a gecko I held.

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            #4046    
          Old July 29th, 2013 (1:54 PM).
          YourNobody's Avatar
          YourNobody YourNobody is offline
             
            Join Date: Jul 2006
            Location: Minnesota, USA
            Age: 33
            Gender: Female
            Nature: Quirky
            Posts: 29
            Oh, I didn't know there was a club like this. It's also good to know that I'm not the only trans person here--I was a bit scared of that. I actually joined this forum a long time ago, but I never posted that much. I have made some attempts now and then to return, but never for very long. Honestly, I wasn't much into Pokemon anymore during those times, so that probably contributed to my leaving. For whatever reason, I've recently gotten into Pokemon again. Specifically, nuzlocke challenges.

            Anyway, I was born with a male body. I never identified as male, though. I grew up not understanding how I could feel one way on the inside and have the opposite body. I thought there was something wrong with me for many years. Keep in mind that I come from a tiny town in central Minnesota and my family is catholic. I was sheltered. I didn't even know what that being transgender was a thing until I was 15. I tried to be a guy off and on as I grew up. Even after breaking down and crying about being a girl a number of times.

            Then hormones kicked in and made everything about a thousand times worse. I found that my body was changing in ways I hated. On top of that, I realized that I liked girls. Now, this is where I lose a lot of people, so I'm going to try to explain this the best that I can. By the time I realized that I liked girls, I had accepted in my heart that I was a girl and there was nothing I could do about it. I tried and failed to be a guy. The fact that I had to try at all was a red flag. I could accept being a girl, despite it all, but being gay? Being gay and trans felt like it was too much. I couldn't handle it.

            I struggled with coming out as trans until I was 26 when I finally did it. I also struggled with being a lesbian for just as long. Still, I came out as a lesbian the same time as coming out as trans. Even now, I have issues with being gay. I can't find myself being proud of being trans or gay. It's just been a hard time. For some people I tell this to, they don't understand how it could be hard for me to accept that I like girls. I was born male, right? That makes it easy. No. No, it doesn't. We're not even talking about my internal conflicts with being gay. Hell, I've had friends accept I was trans, but then stop talking to me when I told them I was a lesbian. My mother also thinks that my homosexuality is a phase. One day I'll wake up and realize I liked men all along. Yeah, right.

            I've had my share of relationships with men. I am panromantic, so I almost like them, but without that sexual spark, it can be hard. It's not impossible, mind you, but it's hard. I've had guys dump me when it finally started to sink in that I didn't want to have sex with them. Or they get paranoid about me cheating on them with a woman, which is silly because women don't show any interest in me. Just guys. Frustrating.
              #4047    
            Old July 29th, 2013 (2:21 PM).
            Kano Shuuya's Avatar
            Kano Shuuya Kano Shuuya is offline
            → you're here, aren't you?
             
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            ^ I would say "you lost me", but I actually related to a lot of that. So like, I know almost exactly where you're coming from. I'm agender, but I've always leaned towards male, and I'm also bi, sooo regardless of what gender I hook up with, it feels kind of gay. Being trans and being bi / gay is an odd combination, and it just a really extreme set of issues to grow up with. So it's no wonder that it takes so many trans people years to deal with / come to terms with situations like that.

            As far as parents going "You're straight, and you'll realize it when you're older", that pisses me off. It's like, when you're 12 and you say you're gay, that's been known to change, or you figure out that you're bi eventually (not always). Young kids go through a lot of changes. Though, when you're nearly an adult and being told that, it's just insulting.
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              #4048    
            Old July 29th, 2013 (4:29 PM).
            Psycho Yuffie's Avatar
            Psycho Yuffie Psycho Yuffie is offline
               
              Join Date: Jul 2013
              Location: Minnesota, USA
              Age: 33
              Gender: Female
              Nature: Quirky
              Posts: 44
              Because I was told the admins can't change usernames, I made a new account. I am YourNobody. Just an FYI.
                #4049    
              Old July 29th, 2013 (10:54 PM).
              Phantom's Avatar
              Phantom Phantom is offline
              Uh, I didn't do it
               
              Join Date: Aug 2011
              Location: Minnesota
              Age: 27
              Gender: Female
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              Posts: 1,186
              Still working on the whole meeting people thing.

              I've been talking to new people, so at least I'm trying and not being a complete hermit.
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                #4050    
              Old July 30th, 2013 (1:42 AM).
              blaziken25's Avatar
              blaziken25 blaziken25 is offline
                 
                Join Date: Jul 2013
                Location: New Zealand
                Age: 20
                Gender: Female
                Nature: Quiet
                Posts: 36
                Can I join? (I dont know how to join)
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