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Old January 16th, 2019 (7:03 PM). Edited January 16th, 2019 by baire.
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baire baire is offline
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    "They don't play a reliable role in shaping children's intelligence or their personality" - Paul Bloom, professor of psychology, in this video I came across while procrastinating
    tl;dw: he claims children in well-off or middle class families are almost entirely shaped by genetics and non-shared environments (ie environmental factors outside of the household such as school)

    what are your parents like? what was your relationship with your parents like? what were the lasting effects of it on you? anything about yourself/your personality that you could confidently point to them as the source of? anything they did, in retrospect, seem hopelesly futile?

    how does it compare with the effects school/other environmental factors have had on you? what has affected your personality the most?
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    Old January 17th, 2019 (10:36 PM).
    strangerhypno strangerhypno is offline
       
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      A lot of things play a factor into shaping a child. Genetics, parenting, quality of life, social life, school, just to name a few. Now I think my parents had a big influence on me but me being a total clown growing up was out of their control. I think my entire lonely childhood has affected my personality to be honest.
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      Old January 18th, 2019 (5:34 PM).
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      I know about Blooms research because my teaching classes are teaching us about it. But i actually dont know what influencing me the most though.
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      Old January 26th, 2019 (3:28 PM).
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      Alexander Nicholi Alexander Nicholi is offline
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      researcher guy sounds coked out of his mind, not gonna lie

      my parents were pretty terrible, but at least they tried. father has dad issues he never addressed and carried it on with us, and mother has a myriad of problems ranging from manners to constant knee-jerk impulsiveness, every other adult understands she isn't capable of holding responsibility on others' behalf.

      but i know how it is with them, i accept it, and i carry on. im not under some dark wing with them anymore because i grew up and got a life, so i deal with them insomuch as i want to. im making strides to help my sister get up and going with her life, because i know alone with mom it's gonna be pointless hell because of her lack of personal agency. you never really sign off family, if you think you did more likely you signed yourself off instead.. no way to live tbh
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      Old February 4th, 2019 (1:21 AM).
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      I strongly disagree with the notion that parenting has no effect on life. I spent the first half of my childhood either in an abusive situation or in foster care, which half the time was more abusive situations. By the time I was adopted, it took years to get me out of the shell that mess had helped create. Even counting school, parents are directly responsible for their children at least 12 to 16 hours a day. I was homeschooled, for all the advantages and disadvantages that brought to a set of children living in the country.

      Public school and similar settings might teach a kid how to socialize, but it's the parents that teach a child through their actions and lessons about how and how not to live. I'm one of those people who saw both sides of both of those coins for an extended period of time. If a kid trusts their parents and they aren't dirt bags, they're more likely to resist poisonous influences in their lives and grow up to be strong, well-rounded people by the time they leave the nest.
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      Old February 4th, 2019 (2:11 PM).
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      I'm no professor of psychology but I'm pretty sure this is a minority opinion even among professors of psychology. It strikes me as obviously wrong at a glance and goes against just about everything I've ever heard on the subject as well as personal experience. Unless I start hearing this from lots of professors of psychology, I'm just going to pass it off as a far-fetched theory largely designed to spur discussion (which it succeeded in).
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