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  #3226    
Old November 18th, 2012 (6:35 PM). Edited November 18th, 2012 by Alice.
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Alice Alice is offline
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I downloaded Grindr, and there's 1 guy within 1 mile of me, who doesn't even show his picture, and the next closest is 49 miles. I guess that's only counting people who are currently online though.

Edit: Checked again, and there's a few people near the college I'm gonna go to. It's like 10x bigger than my old school though, so I may not ever actually meet them. lol
  #3227    
Old November 18th, 2012 (10:26 PM).
Mononoke Hime's Avatar
Mononoke Hime Mononoke Hime is offline
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    I wanna join, may I? :3

    Seems like this is a serious club, where people respect each other and share experiences.
    I saw it a few days ago, but I was thinking if I was going to join or not, and I've decided to join.
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      #3228    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (3:20 AM).
    Phantom's Avatar
    Phantom Phantom is offline
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Mononoke Hime View Post
    I wanna join, may I? :3

    Seems like this is a serious club, where people respect each other and share experiences.
    I saw it a few days ago, but I was thinking if I was going to join or not, and I've decided to join.
    Welcome Mononoke Hime! So, what's your story?
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      #3229    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (4:41 AM).
    Shining Raichu's Avatar
    Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by QuilavaKing
    Edit: Checked again, and there's a few people near the college I'm gonna go to. It's like 10x bigger than my old school though, so I may not ever actually meet them. lol
    You should start using it again once you get to college. It's college, there will be so many gay guys there you won't even be able to spit without hitting one. Grindr is your oyster :P

    I really really want to make a lesbian version of Grindr, because I have an amazing name for it: Mufflr.

    And welcome Mononoke Hime! I'm so happy you've decided to join us :D - yes, as Phantom said, please tell us a bit about yourself!
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      #3230    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (5:11 AM).
    Aeon's Avatar
    Aeon Aeon is offline
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
    I don't think that would have worked for you. Tanner (if I can call you that? :)) had the luxury of assuming that people would be OK with the revelation, and you didn't have that.
    By all means go for it. I tend to be somewhat discrete with my real name for some reason, but once someone finds it out, fair game.

    Yeah, I speculated my family was going to be fine with it. Me being a genderqueer at least (though as I look at it all I feel like I'm leaning more towards being an MtF Transgender), is a totally different story. It's been six years of questioning, and I'm not telling anyone that might slip it out until I feel sure. I have absolutely no idea on how my family would react to it.
      #3231    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (5:18 AM).
    kuzronk's Avatar
    kuzronk kuzronk is offline
    Anything can happen when witches makes the rules
     
    Join Date: Feb 2011
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    I'm joining. I'm not sure if i'm Transsexual myself but I feel like it sometimes. I'm also not sure of what gender I like.
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      #3232    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (10:12 AM).
    Esper's Avatar
    Esper Esper is offline
     
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    Quote ALL the posts!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Mononoke Hime View Post
    I wanna join, may I? :3

    Seems like this is a serious club, where people respect each other and share experiences.
    I saw it a few days ago, but I was thinking if I was going to join or not, and I've decided to join.
    We're serious? Oh, you mean in that we're serious about being cool to everyone and open and that kind of thing. But yeah, we're not like so serious you should be afraid or anything. (This goes to anyone who is lurking, but afraid to post. C'mon, post.)

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
    You should start using it again once you get to college. It's college, there will be so many gay guys there you won't even be able to spit without hitting one. Grindr is your oyster :P

    I really really want to make a lesbian version of Grindr, because I have an amazing name for it: Mufflr.
    That has got to be the most tasteless things I've ever read this morning. I kid. You should go make that.

    Alternately, you could call it Oystr.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Aeon View Post
    By all means go for it. I tend to be somewhat discrete with my real name for some reason, but once someone finds it out, fair game.

    Yeah, I speculated my family was going to be fine with it. Me being a genderqueer at least (though as I look at it all I feel like I'm leaning more towards being an MtF Transgender), is a totally different story. It's been six years of questioning, and I'm not telling anyone that might slip it out until I feel sure. I have absolutely no idea on how my family would react to it.
    I'm glad you're okay talking about it here even if you're keeping it to yourself with people you know in the real world. I only say this because if you do feel you're transgender there's a possibility you'll want to go through some physical changes and that's something you'd rather decide on sooner rather than later.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by TylerSymes View Post
    I'm joining. I'm not sure if i'm Transsexual myself but I feel like it sometimes. I'm also not sure of what gender I like.
    You've come to the right place. There's not much we can do to help you figure out who you are, but we can at least give you a place to talk about it if you'd like. If you're going through that wonderful/awful thing called puberty then there's a possibility you're just getting a feel for who you are, but then again you might fall somewhere into the genderqueer category if you feel that sometimes you're transsexual (by which I assume you mean that sometimes you feel female and sometimes male)
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      #3233    
    Old November 19th, 2012 (11:55 AM).
    Mononoke Hime's Avatar
    Mononoke Hime Mononoke Hime is offline
    viva emptiness
       
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by PhantomX0990 View Post
      Welcome Mononoke Hime! So, what's your story?
      Well, let's see...

      I always felt attraction to women, but the fact I feel attracted to men also maked me forget it until I first kissed a girl. At that point I couldn't pretend this issue didn't exist. I gotta say I was drunk, but that actually helped me to forget society rules and just do it.

      A few months later I caught myself in love with my best friend. I never really told it to her and she just have gone away to other state of the country.

      Since then I'm no longer hidding my own sexuality from myself. It also maked me become to question about what really is passionate love in it's pure form. And I realised that for me it just doesn't matter if is a man or a woman, I just naturally broke that barrier. For me to love someone, it doesn't matter the gender, but who is inside the body.
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        #3234    
      Old November 19th, 2012 (2:36 PM).
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      Alice Alice is offline
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
      Mufflr.
      I have learned a new word today. Thank you.

      lol
        #3235    
      Old November 19th, 2012 (11:26 PM).
      Phantom's Avatar
      Phantom Phantom is offline
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Mononoke Hime View Post
      Since then I'm no longer hidding my own sexuality from myself. It also maked me become to question about what really is passionate love in it's pure form. And I realised that for me it just doesn't matter if is a man or a woman, I just naturally broke that barrier. For me to love someone, it doesn't matter the gender, but who is inside the body.
      Good for you! That's pretty awesome.
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        #3236    
      Old November 20th, 2012 (7:04 PM).
      Mononoke Hime's Avatar
      Mononoke Hime Mononoke Hime is offline
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        Quote:
        Originally Posted by PhantomX0990 View Post
        Good for you! That's pretty awesome.
        Thank you! ^_^
        I also think that anyone who is homofobic just don't really know what love is.
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          #3237    
        Old November 21st, 2012 (2:39 AM).
        LightningAlex's Avatar
        LightningAlex LightningAlex is offline
           
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Mononoke Hime View Post
          Thank you! ^_^
          I also think that anyone who is homofobic just don't really know what love is.
          I don't think that's the case. My parents have been married and in love for 24 years now, yet they are extremely homophobic.

          There are other reasons why people are homophobic. Mostly it's religion (Which also bans a TON of other stuff, too, but since most people do that stuff, it was always "meant as a metaphor"). Other reasons are "it isn't natural" (Homosexuality is found in more than 250 species...), "it's an illness" (Which it isn't), "It's wrong and gross" (I find mucus gross, but you don't see me going around hating and beating people who blow their noses...), and the list goes on. There are a lot of reasons why people are homophobic, all of them stupid. But I think those all are just there to hide the real reason, the real reason being "I have a box on my head that says I should blindly hate gays, but that's stupid so I'll come up with some idiotic reasons since I'm too stubborn and stupid to take the box off".

          Well... at least that's why I think people are homophobic.
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            #3238    
          Old November 21st, 2012 (11:05 AM). Edited November 21st, 2012 by TornZero.
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          TornZero TornZero is offline
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            Quote:
            Originally Posted by LightningAlex View Post
            I don't think that's the case. My parents have been married and in love for 24 years now, yet they are extremely homophobic.

            There are other reasons why people are homophobic. Mostly it's religion (Which also bans a TON of other stuff, too, but since most people do that stuff, it was always "meant as a metaphor"). Other reasons are "it isn't natural" (Homosexuality is found in more than 250 species...), "it's an illness" (Which it isn't), "It's wrong and gross" (I find mucus gross, but you don't see me going around hating and beating people who blow their noses...), and the list goes on. There are a lot of reasons why people are homophobic, all of them stupid. But I think those all are just there to hide the real reason, the real reason being "I have a box on my head that says I should blindly hate gays, but that's stupid so I'll come up with some idiotic reasons since I'm too stubborn and stupid to take the box off".

            Well... at least that's why I think people are homophobic.
            This made me laugh, especially since homosexuality in the Bible is still disputed.
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              #3239    
            Old November 21st, 2012 (11:48 AM).
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            Esper Esper is offline
             
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            I always thought that homophobia (and transphobia) were caused by people being sheltered and never being self-reflective or critical of their beliefs and assumptions. I think hatred is just the byproduct (of course that's kind of how I think hatred works in most cases). So for me I only blame religion inasmuch as religion makes people sheltered and keeps them from thinking critically.
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              #3240    
            Old November 23rd, 2012 (11:25 PM). Edited November 23rd, 2012 by Alice.
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            Alice Alice is offline
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            Just found this documentary on youtube, and thought it might be interesting to some of you. It's about the only Gay bar in northern Mississippi, and the lives of the people that go there. I was surprised at how many people there actually are, and how open they are.

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXvet5I3KpM


            Edit: Don't watch the 3rd part unless you want to cry and be filled with incredible hatred for mankind.
              #3241    
            Old November 24th, 2012 (11:21 AM).
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            Quote:
            Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
            Just found this documentary on youtube, and thought it might be interesting to some of you. It's about the only Gay bar in northern Mississippi, and the lives of the people that go there. I was surprised at how many people there actually are, and how open they are.
            I watched a little of this (like 4 minutes) and I was kind of hoping that it would be about how surprisingly accepting and open this place is, but of course they had to get some opinions of people from the Confederate-flag covered bar down the road, and of course they said a lot of what you'd expect.
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              #3242    
            Old November 24th, 2012 (4:11 PM).
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            There's also a fairly thorough interview with the leader of the westboro baptist church. I wish I hadn't watched it tbh.
              #3243    
            Old November 25th, 2012 (8:58 AM).
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            Aeon Aeon is offline
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            I've always seen the Westboro Baptist Church as a whole though, as an anti-life organization that specifically targets the LGBT community (because according to them buildings will explode if I kiss a boy I guess.)

            Which I guess brings me to a revelation of mine: I'm now entirely accepting to myself being bigendered... though the only specific way I feel I can express it is by wearing completely gender-neutral clothing (which I've actually shifted towards doing already.) I'll have to come out in a different way over it though, but whatever. I'll figure that out when I feel like it's time.
              #3244    
            Old November 25th, 2012 (11:50 AM).
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            Gender-neutral is how I try to look when I go out in public. It's just easier that way. Plus I'm starting to feel like I should identify more as androgyne than trans. Ugh. So many terms.

            So when you say you're bigendered you mean you feel like to move between male and female from time to time?
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              #3245    
            Old November 26th, 2012 (4:05 AM).
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            Quote:
            Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
            So when you say you're bigendered you mean you feel like to move between male and female from time to time?
            Kind of. Rather both simutaneously but frequently feeling much more like one gender over the other. When I wind up switching into girl mode though I'm often okay with my male body. If only i could change my physical appearance for how I currently feel though, then I would be able to fulfill both sides much easier...
              #3246    
            Old November 26th, 2012 (10:17 AM).
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            Quote:
            Originally Posted by PhantomX0990 View Post
            As a whole I consider myself a biromantic asexual.
            I dunno. That sounds to sum things up well as far as I can tell from what you've said. Everything else is just your personality and tastes. You said you're a tomboy. There are plenty of things that tomboys have in common with people who are trans or genderqueer or gay, but really they're not the same exact thing. What's important is that you feel comfortable with who you are and how you identify yourself.

            I'm assuming that there are arguments on this other forum which make you wonder what category you fit into because of your tomboy-ish-ness and so on. (Correct me if I'm wrong though.) It's probably well-intentioned, but don't let other people define who you are if it doesn't feel right.

            Quote:
            Originally Posted by Aeon View Post
            Kind of. Rather both simutaneously but frequently feeling much more like one gender over the other. When I wind up switching into girl mode though I'm often okay with my male body. If only i could change my physical appearance for how I currently feel though, then I would be able to fulfill both sides much easier...
            If only. Wouldn't that be great?
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              #3247    
            Old November 27th, 2012 (1:25 PM).
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            TornZero TornZero is offline
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              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Aeon View Post
              If only i could change my physical appearance for how I currently feel though, then I would be able to fulfill both sides much easier...
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
              If only. Wouldn't that be great?
              That would be absolutely wonderful. I would feel like I'm in paradise.
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                #3248    
              Old November 27th, 2012 (3:14 PM).
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              Sassy Milkshake Sassy Milkshake is offline
              It's ok to cry.
                 
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                trans = auto join
                I'd like to join. Reading some of the posts here are very insightful, information-wise and mentally. And if I can at all contribute to discussions I will.


                Quote:
                Originally Posted by PhantomX0990 View Post
                I'm just wondering if anyone has an opinion. I'm trying to sort my thoughts here.
                I feel like you shouldn't be trying to categorize yourself, and neither should anyone else. Gender and sexuality are treated with such concrete boundaries, I don't think it's completely fair. There are those who don't fit into a specific category and the limited number of "terms/categories" does force some people to move around until they feel like they fit with a certain group, which isn't necessary at all. You sound very confident in who you are, saying you never doubt yourself at all, so I think that's all that matters. Disregard not knowing exactly how you're defined in the eyes of others, or even how you define yourself because in the end I don't think it should matter, you know who you are.

                That's all I got. Sounds kinda negative not to mention roundabout reading back through my response, hope I don't come across that way.
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                  #3249    
                Old November 30th, 2012 (4:29 AM).
                Mononoke Hime's Avatar
                Mononoke Hime Mononoke Hime is offline
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                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by PhantomX0990
                  I'm just wondering if anyone has an opinion. I'm trying to sort my thoughts here.
                  I think that this bunch of labels are just that: labels.
                  Like SassyMilkshake said, you are what you are. Furthermore, this labels are only to guide someone to know him or herself. Each case is different, believe it, so you don't have to worry about you don't following the model of some label, afterall you're an individual being. You are what you are, and set aside these labels if they're giving you any worries. They weren't meant for that.


                  Though it's a different question, I was thinking about something.

                  I know that the gender doesn't affect the sexuality, like only because someone is transgender this doesn't means that this person is homosexual too.
                  But my question is:
                  Why do people relate transgenders with homosexuality?

                  What I think is that society sees everyone in standarts, such as manxwoman and womanxman. If a man feels like a woman, so he necessarily has to be attracted to other men, because that's what woman must do.
                  This same rule has to apply to the homosexuals themselves in their relationships. Most of people think that in a gay couple, one has to assume the role of the "woman", and the other, of the "man".
                  So everyone has to follow this model. I think this hole concept is completety misunderstood.

                  I wanna know what other people here think of this topic.
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                    #3250    
                  Old November 30th, 2012 (8:29 AM).
                  Esper's Avatar
                  Esper Esper is offline
                   
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                  Don't mean to change the subject to quickly but I have POSSIBLE BIG NEWS!

                  The US Supreme Court is deciding today if it's going to take up same-sex marriage. There are 8 possible challenges to bans (including California's Prop 8 ban and the national DOMA law which makes same-sex marriage illegal at the federal level) that the court might take up. Depending on what challenges they choose to hear and what they decide (if they do) we could see marriage equality become a reality very, very soon.

                  If the court doesn't take up Prop 8, for instance, it would mean that whatever the last court, the one right below the Supreme Court, ruled on it would be the final ruling, and that court said it was crap, so in California, in perhaps a matter of house, we might hear that it's (or will be soon) legal to marry again.

                  Now if SCOTUS decides to hear one of the challenges to DOMA directly there's every possibility that they could overturn ALL marriage bans in the country, although there's just as much a chance in this scenario that if they rule against DOMA they'll just say that states should decide who can get married and leave all the bans in place.

                  So... yeah. Could be a crazy good day.
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