3.3. fear and love and loathing.
part iii
linda's p.o.v.
Linda would've been lying if she said she expected Mel to be there when she woke up, not because he didn't care—in fact, it was because he cared so much she was certain he'd go out and do something stupid to try to help her—but it still didn't sit right with her when she opened her eyes and saw she was alone. She was still exhausted however, and fell asleep again right after.
"Hey, Lindy, are you sleeping? Wake up."
"Mel," she murmured, opening her eyes to see him crouching close to her face. "Where did you go?"
"The pokémon center." He hesitated. "I saw Koko. And—no, don't cry again—and I saw Mew. We've made…a plan."
"A plan?" she asked, wiping her eyes. He nodded once.
"Giratina's been captured, and we're not exactly in a condition to help, so we've come up with the idea to get another legendary to help. If nothing else, they can fix Koko so we'll have her back on our side."
"But Mel, the legendary pokémon aren't nice."
"Not most of them anyway, but we're hoping for the best. The alternative is that we sit and do nothing."
"I see that, but… I don't know, Mel, I don't like the sound of this," she admitted.
"I'm trying to believe that we can still have a little luck. It's our last option, Lindy. If it doesn't work, then well…" He just shook his head. "Anyway, I'm breaking you out of here." He held up a bundle of clothes and flowery sandals. With some help from him, she managed to sit up without too much pain, and he pulled the hospital gown over her head. She managed the rest on her own and turned to him when he slung on a Trainer's backpack.
"Where are we going?"
"Somewhere far from the city, in case…you know." He shrugged a shoulder, trying to look passive, but there was pain on his face too. "Oh, and you're going to need to change your face a little."
"Why?"
"We're a little…famous at the moment," he said sheepishly, turning away. "You know, because Giratina was with us."
"Oh." It made sense, but she couldn't see herself drastically changing her appearance. "But you didn't disguise yourself?"
"I snuck around, but considering that we have to leave town, we're gonna
have to face some people. It shouldn't be anything major—simple things can throw a stranger off our tracks. Like, uh…" He rooted through the backpack for a few seconds before pulling out a pair of glasses with a skewed wire frame.
"Where did you get those?" she asked, wrinkling her nose as she tried looking through them.
"The hospital's lost and found. People lose some pretty nice stuff there." He held up an MP3 player, scratched but in good condition, and a cellphone. "By the way, the stuff I picked up had been there six months or more, so I doubt the owners were coming back for them." She looked up in surprise as he held the phone up to her face. It took a moment, but she recognized the number he had dialed. "If you want to… I mean, this may be the last time we'll talk to them."
"They'll be mad," she whispered, swallowing.
"Totally. But I think they'd be easier on you than me."
"At the same time?" she suggested. He nodded, but it took him a while longer to work up the nerve to press the dial button. The ringing tone filled the silent room and Mel muttered some sort of prayer about them not being home. At the last second a phone clicked on the other end:
"Hello?" Tears welled in Linda's eyes—it felt like she hadn't heard her mother's voice in years. Mel, too, looked stricken, but tried to hide it. "Hell-o?"
"Mom…"
"Wha— Linda? Linda, is that you?" Her mom's voice cracked and static sounded as she dropped the phone. She picked it up after a moment, sounding completely breathless. "Linda, what happened? Where did you two go? Is Melchior there too?"
"I'm here," he said flatly. She took a few moments to compose herself, and when she returned she sounded more suspicious and angry than tearfully relieved.
"Why did you two leave?" she demanded. "Do you know how worried sick I was?"
"It was my fault," Mel said, setting the phone down between them and wringing his hands together. "I wanted to leave, and…and she tried to talk me out of it, but she came along just to make sure I didn't die or anything. It's my fault, Mom."
"Why? Why would you want to leave?"
"I didn't— I wanted a journey." He looked ashamed now, ashamed and pitiful. "It sounds pretty pathetic and selfish now that I say it out loud, but back then it was all I could think about. You were so paranoid about me that I'd relapse at any second, and I hated being treated like glass. I wanted…something normal, and being a Trainer is about as normal as things can get." He squared his shoulders for a second, then all the energy left his body. "But things went…bad. Horrible. I wish I would've stayed. I'm sorry. Sorry doesn't even cut it here."
"It doesn't matter," she said finally after a moment of silence. "When are you two coming back?" There it was, the hardest part of the conversation. Linda hid behind her hands, trying to choke down a sob. Mel's hand was light on her shoulder as he answered:
"We don't know."
"You don't know…?"
"When we'll be coming back." And a pause, and both his arms went around her, holding her as if she was glass, but she could sense he was on the precipice of breaking too. "Or…if we'll be coming back."
"You would really leave, leave and not come back?" she asked in a faint voice that cracked slightly. Linda shook her head even though she couldn't see them.
"It's not that… We want to come back, but we might…we may…die," Linda whispered. It was the first time either had acknowledged it, and it brought the crushing weight of reality down like a fist from god.
It didn't make sense, it made no sense. They were just thirteen years old, two thirteen-year-olds from an average town of an average province looking for an average journey. They were meant to go out, and Mel would realize he should go back after a lengthy period of his legendary stubbornness, and eventually they'd return home, and their mother would be cross but forgive them in time, and things would be fine, things would be
normal.
Instead, what they found was Giratina—Orville at the time—and he dragged them onto the adventure of several lifetimes. They've encountered Legendary Pokémon, Mew and Latios (the latter of which not being a pleasant one) that they'd never think of seeing, but not only were they proven real, they were just as powerful as they seemed. Just as apathetic as they seemed, too, or else the three of them wouldn't have been in such a huge conundrum. She wished that the Pokémon were as friendly as the stories told, but they were just stories after all. She remembered the days of reading them and wished she could go back, both her and Mel, to the days of dreaming of a journey rather than being thrown under the bridge for one.
They had a grand purpose. They were to help Giratina find and resolve the anomaly problem, which was Linda, which made their goals coincide. Maybe, then, if Linda had told him of her problem sooner, it could've been resolved sooner, and none of that would have happened. But it was all in the past and couldn't be changed; they were in the future, and they were to put all their energy into fixing what they'd begun.
"Die?" Linda and Mel's mom repeated. "What? Why would you two… What's going on, Mel, Linda?"
"It's a lot to explain," Linda began, and Mel pulled away to give her a hard look.
Don't say it, it said, and she understood. Their mother was very down-to-earth, had never considered going on a Trainer's journey even when she was younger and the excitement was at its peak. She couldn't understand the importance of their situation—she'd demand them to come home anyway, or even if she didn't, Linda still couldn't risk her by going back. "…I'm sorry, Mom. We're both so sorry."
"Linda, Mel—"
"We wanted to talk to you one more time," Mel said, scrubbing his eyes. "But hopefully, this won't be the last time. We don't want to do this, but we must, so please believe in us, Mom. Please."
"You two—"
"We love you," Linda said. "More than anything. And we're sorry for leaving, again. Bye, Mom…"
"Bye, Mom…"
"I love you two too, but wait—"
They hung up. Then they held each other for a long time in silence.
╬╬╬
Linda's back ached. It made sense considering what had happened, but what didn't make sense was the sense that the pain increased with each footstep towards the train station. Mel was a few paces ahead of her, his shoulders slumped but his head high. Mew was flying next to him in the form of a togekiss.
She thought of seeing Koko before they left, gently stroking her fur as she'd done a million times before, and saying her goodbyes. Perhaps it was because Koko knew she would be dying either way, but she wasn't as distraught as Linda was, which was comforting. Neither said anything the whole time, until Linda was leaving and Koko spoke up: "You won't die. I know you won't." Her certainty made Linda's stomach turn.
"Linda?" Mel asked in concern. She shook it off and clapped her hands to her cheeks, bringing herself back to the present moment and jogging to catch up with them.
"I'm…not fine," she admitted. "I can't be."
"It'd be shocked if you
were fine," he said with a bitter smile.
"How are you doing, Mew?"
"Better," she said, but she didn't seem happy.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't like this, not at all," was all she said before turning away. Linda looked at Mel, who didn't have the strength to look back at her, and they continued.
When they reached the station, Mel bought their tickets while Linda and Mew sat in a café that overlooked the hoary landscape around them. Linda ordered for the three of them while Mew rolled a pokéball between her wings. "Isn't that Shady's?" Linda asked. "When did Mel get him back?"
"Before you woke," she answered. "He had to go back to Orville's room to do so, and it was none more pleasant than the first time, but with me it was easier."
"What did you do to him? Orville?"
"I only put him to sleep. I didn't want to hurt him, not after what Giratina had done…" She sighed and brought the pokéball to a halt. "Us legendary pokémon, we were created by Arceus to make humans' lives easier, but all we do is lurk within our own realms and loathe them as humans loathe insects."
"Doesn't it care though? Arceus doesn't care?"
"I wouldn't know. We don't see Arceus too often—it's busy maintaining all existence majority of the time. We only really see him for gatherings, like the one we had before Giratina came. In fact, gatherings are where a lot of us reunite for the first time in decades. We don't interact often, period."
"That's horrible. I couldn't imagine having that kind of relationship with Mel." Mew laughed a little.
"I envy you two's relationship."
Mel returned just as the food arrived: watermelon for her and Mew, a gyro for Mel. He stared at it for a moment. "The hell is this?"
"Mel!"
"Sorry. What is this?"
"It's a gyro, I saw it on the menu. It's chicken in flatbread with tomatoes and onion and tzatziki sauce—I thought it sounded exotic."
"And you just got it for me and not for you?" he deadpanned, frowning, as he unwrapped it and peered inside like a zubat was going to jump out.
"Because you would've just gotten bread or something plainer. At least once, Mel, you should try something new. You're not gonna get sick off of random foods anymore," Linda said. He blinked, his frown deepening, then he picked up the wrap and took a bite with no further complaints and continued to eat in a concerning silence.
"This is amazing!" Mew exclaimed after taking a bite of watermelon. "It's so sweet!"
"Right?" Linda agreed, beaming alongside her. "You've never had it before?"
No, she said in amazement.
"It must not have been in season when you came."
I've come a lot, she said offhandedly, the juice matting her feathers down. M
aybe it was just a hidden gem. Like you two.
Mel and Linda exchanged a look, then gazed at Mew, who was still enjoying the watermelon. "What do you mean?"
I'm glad to have met you two, she continued,
that's what I mean. She swallowed, and for just a second she appeared in her normal form.
It's actually not that often that the universe is in danger and we legendaries can take direct part in the affairs. I believe that the last interesting thing that happened was with a Sceptile and an odd Zoroark, but my memory's faulty sometimes.
"But…didn't we cause trouble?" They realized they were speaking in sync and broke apart. Linda continued timidly, "It's because of me that the anomalies are happening in the first place. That doesn't bother you?"
Anomalies within themselves are common—every half century or so they'll happen one way or another. As I've told Mel already, the fault doesn't lie with either of you. It's just something that happened, and fate chose it to happen to you. And when it's over… She looked down at the half-eaten watermelon with a sour expression.
If you two last that long, in any case.
The pressure that had momentarily subsided returned in a heartbeat, smothering them once more. Maybe fate found it better to give them a break in the wake of what they were doing, because as a train pulled up Mel announced that it was theirs. Linda left her watermelon untouched—she didn't much feel like eating anymore.
╬╬╬
"You still remember the day we left?"
Linda was surprised to see Mel's clothes thrown through the doorway as she walked up the hall. Koko jumped out of her backpack and onto the floor, sniffing at them curiously, while Linda forged ahead into his bedroom. He had his drawers yanked out and all his possessions scattered except a few piled onto his bed.
"Linda!" he exclaimed when he saw her. His face was flushed and his hair was wildly disheveled as he held his hands out. "Let me get your backpack?"
"Yes, but—Mel!" she cried as she handed it over and he dumped her stuff out unceremoniously. He began packing his own belongings inside.
"I'm leaving today," he muttered as he went. "Right now, in fact. I'm leaving on a journey, me and Shady."
"You're…leaving us?" she whispered. "Leaving me?" He hesitated, but just for a second.
"It's something I have to do, Lindy."
"You're not going alone," she interjected, stepping forward. He zipped up the stuffed bag and hauled it onto his shoulders with a huff, staring at her with wide eyes. Koko barked her agreement as Mel straightened. Then, slowly, he smiled.
"Well, can't argue there."
Linda hugged herself tighter as she watched Snowbelle City disappear into the wintry horizon. She wondered if she would ever see the city again—or rather, if she would ever see anything again.
"Of course," Linda responded.
The trees of the forest were soon gone as well, leaving only piles and piles of snow. It almost looked like a scene from a dream, it was so abstract.
"Feels like centuries ago." Mel paused, then looked at Mew, who was taking up space in his lap. She had gone oddly silent since the ride began—Linda assumed she was meditating. "Meeting Giratina, the other hand, feels like seconds ago. I dunno, there are these weird blank spaces where I'd expect him to insult me and shove me around." He paused again. "I miss him."
"Me, too."
"So the man, the real Orville," Linda asked tentatively, "is he in pain?" Orville gave her a very odd look, like he felt an emotion that he couldn't articulate on his face.
"Is he…in pain?" he repeated. "Well…I said that he is, didn't I?"
"And you're in pain too?" He just nodded, still bewildered. "It sounds cruel, that the both of you are in constant pain," she said with a sad look.
"No, no, no no no, please don't pity me," he sighed, slouching over again. "I don't want it, nor do I need it. If there's one thing Arceus can teach you, it's that pain is just as irrelevant as time. There are worse things than pain, Linda, like…" He deflated even more if it was possible, then he turned on his heel and started walking again, muttering incomprehensibly to himself.
The rest of the people in the car had gone to the dining cart. After a moment, Mew returned to normal, lining up with the window and watching the flat landscape turn to snowcapped mini-mountains. "Have you ever been captured, Mew?" Mel asked all of a sudden.
…No, she said after a moment's thought, turning to look at him.
I don't get caught off-guard a lot. Also, most of my time here is spent in Yggdrasil.
"I thought that Yggdrasil was the portal or whatever that passes through here?"
That's the old name for it, yes. More modernly, it's known as the Tree of Beginnings.
"The Tree of Beginnings!" Linda exclaimed. "I've read about that! It's a kind of sanctuary for all pokémon over at the edge of Kanto. But it really connects to other worlds?"
It does, she confirmed.
Although only legendary pokémon can access that portal, it is the Tree of Beginnings that holds it. Still, the pokémon within exist in a slightly different space than yours. It's a beautiful place even without the Yggdrasil title. It's equal parts sunny and rainy for all pokémon to enjoy, and there's always plump and delicious berries to eat and the pokémon are friendly.
"Asgard," Mel muttered. Mew gave him a peculiar look and he shrugged. "I mean, it fits with Yggdrasil…"
Hmm?
"Never mind."
I want to know! she protested. Mel crossed his arms and looked away, at which she huffed angrily, but the effect was lost with her size.
Melchior!
"I told you I don't like that name!" he snapped.
Melchior!
"Ugh!"
Linda laughed with it, getting an exasperated expression from Mel, and she ruffled his hair in response. He glanced out the window and saw something that made his eyes widen.
"We're here," he announced in a grim tone. She followed his gaze but couldn't see anything but more snow and frost.
"Where is 'here?'"
"It's an old Trainer's battlefield," he explained. "It's been abandoned for a long time because the area's gotten colder recently. There's nobody for miles around."
"Oh. —Oh." She gently picked up Mew, who returned to a togekiss in her arms, and stood. Mel's head was down as the train kept speeding past.
"Mew?" he said quietly. She nodded and reached out, touching his outstretched hand with her wing. The colors of the train blurred and smudged around them, and for a moment Linda felt dizzy, then the ambient reds and browns were replaced by bright whites and greys and blues. She blinked into the sudden sunlight and watched the train continue on for a moment, then Mew moaned as a trickle of blood came from the corner of her mouth.
I'm fine, she said, turning back and flying into the air, itching at her bandages.
It's going to take some readjusting. I'll be fine.
"Can you still do it?" Mel asked when Linda didn't have the nerve to.
Yes, just give me a second. After a few breaths, she closed her eyes as energy started sparking around her.
This is the last chance for you two to stop this. When the anomaly opens, there is no telling who will come out. They may kill you on the spot.
Mel and Linda grasped each other's hands. He sighed shakily, his breath freezing into a misty cloud. "Two halves of one whole. Just like the sun and moon make up a day—"
"—love and hate make up a person," she said in response, squeezing his hand. They gazed at Mew, who was waiting with an expression that was equal parts anxious and exasperated.
"Do it."
