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Old 1 Week Ago (2:00 PM).
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Mittens95 Mittens95 is offline
    Join Date: Feb 2014
    Age: 24
    Gender: Male
    Posts: 209
    Yeah, just needed to get this one out.

    Years ago, I went through an 'edgelord' phase, yep! cringe culture, racism, ableism, so on and so forth. This is what many insecure teens/even college age adults (believe it or not - I Dm'd a best friend of mine from high school who's a university teacher as of rn, and he bombarded me with racist 4chan gunk. ugh.) High school just never ends for some people. Not to say that there are any excuses for what I've done however.

    I still carry a lingering sense of guilt, and wish that I could get myself to apologize to said victims (From HS, on reddit, various social networking platforms and to bluntly put it; even here on PC.) But I just don't know how to approach without (presumably) getting turned down.

    It is what it is I suppose. There was a song a friend of mine recommended to me a while back called 'Rivers and Roads' - lyrics here touch upon this. Super hard hitting despite the track being overproduced pastiche Starbucks-core indie folk. And I've been resonating to this old favorite track of mine more than ever before.

    So anybody else here know this feeling? This melancholy over regrets from projecting insecurities over others, and feeling like I can't be forgiven or unable to make up for damages adequately?
    but we will not be submissive
    we're on a mission
    we'll finish that cup of who-knows-what
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    Old 1 Week Ago (4:38 PM).
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    ZeoStar ZeoStar is offline
    Join Date: Oct 2017
    Location: dream world
    Age: 18
    Gender: Male
    Nature: Mild
    Posts: 2,452
    I was very shy through 6th-8th grade, so I sometimes think back and wish I spoke more.
    Favorite Pokemon
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    Old 1 Week Ago (3:05 PM).
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    hoshiko hoshiko is offline
    PC's jacksepticeye enthusiast
    Join Date: Apr 2010
    Location: deep south
    Age: 21
    Gender: Other
    Nature: Gentle
    Posts: 1,845
    i regret many things in my life. one of the main things being not standing up for myself against my bullies in middle school, but i don't really like to dwell on the past and think "what if". i try not to think about it, but it is difficult sometimes.
    they/them ★ pashminatumblr
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    Old 1 Week Ago (3:17 PM).
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    XIII XIII is offline
    don't you remember?
    Join Date: May 2011
    Age: 20
    Gender: Other
    Posts: 1,840
    I have regrets about just about every phase of my life, honestly. Regrets about dating certain people, wasting my time, not doing things sooner, etc. Currently I'm regretting not trying as hard as I could've in my 4-year (working to get back there) because now I'm stuck living with my awful relatives and I feel like a leech. To come to my own defense, though, I had awful, debilitating, untreated depression and anxiety when I was sent off to college. I tried to manage it by myself but I couldn't keep up with classes at all.
    let's meet again
    in the next life
    yeah... i'll be waiting
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    Old 1 Week Ago (8:49 PM).
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    Aslan Aslan is online now
    the pretender
    Join Date: Mar 2013
    Gender: Female
    Nature: Modest
    Posts: 2,437
    I do regret how I acted when I first opened up about depression and anxiety - I had been holding so much in that looking back on it now with a rational perspective, it must have been very overwhelming and exhausting to be around me at the time. The newfound support was a lot for me - so I think I used it too much and relied too heavily on other people for support. I regret how much pressure that would put on people but instead of wallowing in it, I decided I just needed to change and organise my own help as my friends can't always be there to lean on. In a way, recognising that regret has been good because I've been a lot more proactive in helping myself.

    I also regret a lot of things I have done or said, but not much I can do but move on and just keep striving to improve for the future.
    it's true
    look how they shine for you
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    Old 1 Week Ago (5:57 AM).
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    Dawn Dawn is offline
    of the Final Day
    Join Date: Oct 2014
    Location: Away with the fairies
    Age: 29
    Gender: Other
    Nature: Quiet
    Posts: 10,702
    If I think about it I have more regrets in my life than I do moments I can be proud of, but...well, I don't really have time for them. Regretting things doesn't accomplish anything, other than to create more regrets about opportunities missed. So yeah.
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    Old 1 Week Ago (6:18 AM). Edited 1 Week Ago by symire.
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    symire symire is offline
      Join Date: Sep 2016
      Location: Perak, Malaysia
      Age: 15
      Gender: Male
      Nature: Timid
      Posts: 1,468
      I regret dwelling on regretting the choices I made in the past even though I can just learn a thing or two from that particular event, forget it, and make more meaningful regrets in the future than to repeat the same mistakes. (as meta as this sounds, I'm serious)

      As contrary to the sincere statement I made above, I want to take my precious time to lay this out even though I should be sleeping (won't regret sleeping later since this thread is kind of helping me), I regret a lot of things and want to talk about it.

      I regret that I denied help from people who genuinely cared for me and wanted me to better myself. I pushed them out because saying "I am useless, I have no hope of improving and functioning as a human" felt comfortable as it convinced me that I was incapable of change, which is scary. In the end, I denied myself, not knowing how I felt or what I actually wanted. Thankfully and ironically, I found that my behaviour in the past, the choices I made, were what caused me to fall so low, and now I have a reference on how to be better; self-acceptance. I can look back, look at how I was, negotiate with myself, then change for the better.

      I regret trying to be perfect. When I first joined PC, I was so bewildered by the fact that most of the mods/admins here were given promotions at such a young age. I thought them to be perfect, so I tried being what they are/were, and that includes joining in adult conversations, doing stupid, edgy muk like posting unneeded comments that I thought were "cool + helpful". Long after, I learned that they make mistakes, they had been infracted on this forum before (in fact, many times), and they learn from their wrongdoings, which made them what they are now. I was obsessed with trying to be what they are that I forgot how they did it; take a slow step, make mistakes, tumble, get back up. You don't have to be perfect to start with, you have to start to be perfect. (stolen quote lmao)

      Speaking of perfection, I regret hating myself over how I look. My appearance is what I describe "ugly". Now that I am beginning to not hate myself that much, am I a little less ugly? No, my face still looks like muk. But unless I'm an idol, people don't demand that much from me, especially with my looks. I don't need to look handsome or physically appealing to find true love. (wow, so much edge)

      I regret "falling in with the crowd". I have a habit; screw what's right or wrong, what majority says, they must be correct, so I'll say what they say. This is what made me not able to stand for myself. I find it hard having an ideology, because I was so absorbed into others' that I couldn't even differentiate what I wanted to believe in, no matter how true or untrue. I want to have my own belief, one where no one would use their "truth" to change my perspective, without me being a selfish person.
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      Old 1 Week Ago (7:40 PM).
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      Marth Marth is offline
      Join Date: Jun 2013
      Location: Canada
      Age: 29
      Nature: Timid
      Posts: 15,321
      I let people walk all over me because I'm not sure how to be assertive.
      Whenever I try and stick up for myself, it comes off aggressive.

      The sky is falling, seal the borders, heighten the anxiety
      A steady diet of hysteria shapes history
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      Old 1 Week Ago (7:44 PM). Edited 1 Week Ago by colours.
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      colours colours is online now
      wandererjustlikeme 🌟
      Join Date: Apr 2005
      Location: in an eternal dream
      Gender: Female
      Nature: Jolly
      Posts: 3,186
      I have a ton of regrets. As much as I dwell over them (because depression, yay), I can't really go into the past and fix whatever I regret doing.

      So I take those experiences and learn from them in the hopes that it would make me a better person in the future.
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