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The Difference?

Started by <Challenger> June 7th, 2015 5:04 AM
  • 7 replies


Age 24
Seen 1 Minute Ago
Posted 4 Hours Ago
20,357 posts
7.5 Years
I'd say that if your writing hasn't improved at least a little if you have been RPing for an extended period of time, you're doing something wrong.

Edit: Okay that makes me sound too brutal. I don't expect everyone to be literary gods, I just think it's pretty much impossible for constantly writing to not have some positive effect on your writing ability.


Not Suitable For All Ages

Seen 5 Hours Ago
Posted July 18th, 2019
13,229 posts
6.6 Years
I haven't seen any changes for the better in my writing. If anything I think the quality of my writing may have gone down which is surprising given how crappy it was before :x



Age 23
Seen March 15th, 2017
Posted June 14th, 2015
1,940 posts
8.2 Years
Mine improved a lot from when I first joined, I made my original account in January of 2011, and this one in August 2011. When I first started I wasn't that great got a lot of Infractions and couldn't use my account for a few weeks. But by October of that year I received the Most Improved Roleplayer emblem. It takes work and patience but doing this for four years has really improved my writing ability.


Beyond The Stars

Seen 4 Weeks Ago
Posted July 5th, 2019
737 posts
8.6 Years

(I always read all theposts before entering)
Michael wander into a openning at the south of the region, He see 4 Pokémon and a trainer. He run over to the Trainer "Hello, you look like you like Pokémon." (I know I couldn't think of anything else I'm tired)
He blushed slightly as her blue eyes looked into my grey eyes "My name is Michael, I have a Empoleon but I guess I could show your pokémon in the morning" Michael looked over to two of Cassie's Pokémon that seemed very fond of each other "Seems like you've done good so far.. may I travel with you?"
That is not relevent due to me making a teacher... I'll get right on it unless you have something to say.

Scrap that I'm going to make a student.


Name Markus Stale

Nickname (Optional): Sake

Age (10-15): 10

Gender (Male or Female): Male

Dorm (Raikou Dorm, Entei Dorm or Suicune Dorm): Raikou

Appearance (A picture will do but describe what he/she wears otherwise and any other information):

Personality: Sake is a playful little person. He is energetic most of the time, but if you challenge him he won't give up. He is kind to people who help him and is well-mannered.

He is scared of darkness. He likes the colour grey. He gives of a joyful feeling into the air when he bounces into any room. He is also sweet when needed, very jokey and has a phobia of flying types. He has a kind of short temper.
He is not really a hard worker, and he easily understands and sympathizes with others. So he is not completely selfish. Also he likes pokémon very much.

When he was 9 he ran into the tall grass and fell over and suddenly noticed an eevee after looking up. It nudged him. Sake looked up and saw the wild pokémon. It purred and prowled around him "Hey..." Sake felt a pang in his left leg. he rolled up his trousers and saw a cut. The eevee saw this.

It ran away and then a minute later a Chancy came in looking at the cut and then used its powers to heal the cut, this Chancy had a pattern of crosses representing that it was wild! The Eevee looked up at him. Sake remembered about the pokéball. He knew how they were used, yet he had never used a pokéball before. He decided to put the pokéball on the floor. He had the pokéball open. Sake was thinking he could be a trainer, he was thinking it would be nice to have an eevee as a companion. He was hoping, wishing really hard that he could capture the pokémon. The pokémon went over to it and was easily captured. Sake got up and took the pokéball and ran to the pokémon centre.

He gave his pokéball to the nurse and explained what happened.

"Strange indeed!" the nurse exclaimed.
She sat down and searched the pokédex.
"I have never seen this happen before... Maybe it just likes you." said the nurse.
He took the pokéball, he was pleased with himself and he got home where his mother and father were having a row, so he crept towards his best friend's house and explained all that had happened that day to his best friend John. Sake was so excited.

"Wow totally cool!" John said as he stroked Eevee.
"Return, mate." Sake said to his Eevee. He went home and then his mother sent him to bed for being late. The next morning, it was his 10th birthday. His mother and father had another row. His mother threw a chair at his father knocking him unconscious and most likely giving him a concussion, so in fear Sake ran down the road.

He ran over to the docks and he took whatever money his cousin gave him and bought a ticket for a boat and then an hour later he landed, he was pleased to be away from his home. He swiftly ran down the several twisty roads, he saw the academy and looked at his pokéball. “Yeah!” Sake exclaimed. He scampered in and enrolled. The course at the academy was just what he had always dreamed of.

Pokémon (Up to 3 Maximum No Legendaries or Shinies or stage 3 Pokémon):
Species: Eevee
A playful little Pokémon. Who is energetic most of the time but if you challenge it, it wont give up, it is kind to people who help it and is well-mannered.
Lvl(Max 20): 10
Moveset: Tackle, Bite, Tail Whip, Quick attack

That to this:


Πρωταθλητής Θάλασσα
Pro̱tathli̱tí̱s Thálassa

The arsonists were herded in the Police Vans, the scene was clear. Yet faced with an interesting dilemma, the Police were unsure if he could be a champion or if he was a criminal. He acted and sounded like a Hero, but he couldn't be a Champion as they were gone. Gingerly, the police officers held the grip of their gun in their sheaths. Sea Champion looked around at the nervous police officers looking at him. He brought up his transceiver skimming through the options, he tuned it in to the radio of the Police, the channel allocated to the university scene was found easily. He held it to his helmet opening. "Relax, I am a Champion, the Sea Champion." He talked in to the transceiver. Momentarily, he was met with a stunned silence of the radio, sensing a dumbfounded recognition.
Then a voice crackled through, "All units in Area 04, go 10-8. It's Code 4 here. Suspect verified, a champion." the radio chatter continued. From a police motorcycle, an officer dismounted and walked over to Sea Champion. He took off his bike helmet, "A champion, I thought they were extinct, but I just got verification from the HQ." He extended his hand.
"Lieutenant Turmal, Hyperia Police Department."
"I have limited time to chit-chat." Sea Champion spun around, leaving the officer perplexed. Sea Champion strode out on to the street, weird looks and condemning gazes washed over him. Sea Champion looked at his transceiver, it buzzed gently. He browsed through the watch, several different notification filled the screen. He pressed one, it came up with a map and a blue line snaking around in the roads. It directed him to the docks, a flashing red bar on the screen said "URGENT" Underneath it said "Priority." He couldn't go all the way to the docks on foot. He needed to grab a ride.
The radio was flooded by emergency chatter. Noise blaring from their sirens. The Paramedic gripped the steering wheel firmly as he forced the accelerator to floor. His brow was lined with sweat, his dreary eyes yearned for sleep. He took the flask from the glove compartment, he needed to be awake, he chugged down the coffee, the caffeine invigorated him. The usual graveyard shift was tame compared to the current panic sweeping the city. The EMS was spread thin. The traffic was as thick as mud. Fortunately, the Fire/Ambulance lane was free, he raced down it a top speed. A small thud was heard from above him but he ignored it. He picked up the radio.
"Medic 43 Control." He paused, the radio responded.
"Can I get the details on my current call?" He talked in to the microphone.
"48-year-old male, complained of chest pains, now unconscious, possible heart attack, he is on a boat, away from shore. Police are on scene and have cleared the area." Dispatch paused, "Medic 43, be advised, Life Guard services are unavailable."
What?! How are we meant to deal with someone out in the water?! His heart began to thump loudly, the blood racing pulsated in his ears. The bay was approaching, the paramedic spun the steering wheel, turning the corner sharply. Another small thud was heard as the ambulance turned. Racing through the blockade, he pushed down the brakes suddenly, the vehicle skidded to a stop. The ambulance lurched forward as it ground to a halt. In doing so accompanying a loud thud from the roof of the vehicle. What was that? He didn't have time to look. Determined to save a life, he jumped out of the ambulance, he grabbed his EMS kit and sprinted towards the group of officers on scene.
"Situation?" He asked hastily.
"Looks like he was rowing a boat when he had some chest pains, we can't get any boats to him, they're tied up in other calls." The Police Officer responded factually, while his companion seemed worried.
"So, we have no way to reach him?" He sighed, he couldn't let another get on his record.
A deep voice came from behind. "You do."
The paramedic swung around to face the voice, before him was a fully clad ancient greek soldier, standing proud with a bronze chestplate that emulated a six-pack, a metal clad arms and boots with a metal shin guard, he even had a blue cape and a dark blue plume. The sides of his armour were bare but the two pieces of metal were tied together. The Paramedic couldn't believe his eyes, partly due to the astonishing sight of a Hoplite in the flesh, and the other part was due to his surprise that having a geeky re-enactment goof was going to give them a chance to save the man.
"Sea Champion, at your service." He responded.
It wasn't the first time Sea Champion had ridden the top of a vehicle, but every time he did it, it felt exhilarating. Though, the journey was bumpy and his fingers ached slightly. Nevertheless, it was time to work. Ignoring the hassle produced by the worrisome officers, he brushed them aside. He readied himself at the edge of the bay. The officer attempted, once again, to stop him. He placed his hand on Sea Champion's shoulder. He turned around to the police officer who started to order him around, Sea Champion grasped the Officer's shoulder, he leaned in and whispered, "You either let me do my job or that man dies." Without waiting for a response, he lunged forward propelling himself upwards in to the air. Mid-air, his body became a flash of azure erupting like newborn star. His torso armour melded with his body and became absorbed. His lower armour also returned to his skin, his legs lit up a bright cerulean, mushing together and spiralling in to a large mass of energy. The energy throbbed like a beating heart, the blue energy than dissipated in to a shape, the shape then faded revealing a long, scaled tail with fins the colour of lapis lazuli. Gills opened at his neck. This was but a moment suspended in mid-air he had transformed.

He angled his body for the impact. The water washed over him, filling him with an intense surge of intoxicating adrenaline and the nourishing aurora of the sea. Sea Champion shot forth, his body charged forward at an incredibly high velocity, pockets of nothingness and bubbles trailed him like a tunnel under the water. Nearing his target, he de-accelerated, the rowing boat made a large shadow slicing in to the water below. Sea Champion broke the surface. The man was definitely unconscious. Sea Champion didn't waste even a second. He fiddled with the oars, shoving them out of the way. He reached for the man but failed. He decided he would have to roll the man in to the water. He heaved the side of the boat, the rotund man rolled off the boat and plopped down in the water, he swam under him and slung the man over his shoulder. His weight being supported by the water aided Sea Champion greatly. He swam forward, he made a beeline straight to the dock. The water sloshed behind him, leaving a frothy trail. Gripping the wood of the quay, his journey had come to an end. He lifted the man up on to the jetty. The man was quickly attended by Paramedics who placed him on a stretcher. The paramedic he had talked to before shot him a glance. Sea Champion responded, "You're welcome!"

Sea Champion retreated to a secluded part of the beach, under the pier. He transformed back in to a human, he also re-generated his disguised scale attire. He trudged back up to the pier. He noticed a small hot dog shack. The jolly owner of the van smiled as he saw Alex walking up. "Burgers, Hotdogs, Bacon Sarnies! Get them while their hot!" Alex nodded to him. "What will it be, mate?"
Alex looked at the menu, the foods listed made his stomach churn. "Hotdog." He decided.
The Chef quickly placed the sausage in the long bun. Alex placed some money on the counter. "Pleasure doing business."
Alex turned away, walking on, taking out the sausage and throwing it in to the water. Then he proceeded to eat the bread roll. He walked along the pier. The sea gulls were squawking above him but just as he was going to let his mind wander he heard a scream.
Jody had decided to treat Abby to a trip to the beech, she wanted to spend as much time as possible with her 8-year-old daughter before the new addition to the family is born. She knew that this would be a hard time for Abby, Jody bought Abby new swimwear a few weeks ago, ever since she's been ecstatic about being able to use it. Jody was sunbathing on the beach, Abby was playing in the sea but then a large wave swelled up and slammed in Abby, smashing in to the water, she was sucked under, her blow-up ring floated away. She screamed for help but only ended up with a gargle and a mouthful of water. With the lapping waves pushing her down every time she struck the surface, she scrambled around trying to swim but ended up failing. Her foot caught under something, she was helpless. Untill a trench provided by a wave dipped down to her head for a brief second where she let out scream, half gargling and a bit of sputtering but the scream was heard by Jody, who had just looked over. Where was Abby?! She panicked. She looked around frantically for a lifeguard.

Abby hoped that someone had heard her. She was panicking, unable to swim and stuck underwater. Her trapped foot sent a sharp jarring pain. A splash entered the water, emitting a shockwave through the water. Through the cloud of white froth, emerged Alex. Alex clenched his fist slightly, leaving a small opening, in the opening he absorbed the water to create a bubble of air. Alex expanded the bubble and and then moved the bubble to her mouth.
"Breath this and hold your breath." His voice carried clearly through the water. Alex attempted to grab the girl and pull her up to the surface but she cringed with pain, her foot was unable to move. Alex swam deeper inspecting the foot. Her foot was stuck in a chain link. There, under the water, was a large rusty anchor that had sunken in to the ground. The chain was wedged in to a rock with a small semi-loop in which she had her foot stuck in. He examined the chain, he couldn't pull the foot out, and he couldn't twist the chain in to a better posistion. He realised what was necessary, He summoned power to his hands. He placed his hand on the chain link and forced the metal to bend. The metal chain link bent in to a circle, releasing her foot. However, bending it was tiring, but Alex had no time to pause. He swam up and linked his arm around her and swam up to the beach. The mother looked on worriedly. Strategicly keeping his face away from the girl's mother and keeping his tail under water. He absorbed the water from the girl's lungs and then got ready to transform when the girl tapped him.
"You're like Ariel aren't you?" The little girl asked him, judging from Alex's puzzled face, she explained lowering her voice, "You're a mermaid?"
Alex looked down at his tail, blushing slightly, "I guess so... yes." he observed her childish smile. "But it's our little secret, ok?"
She nodded eagerly. The girl's mother ran over to her. "Abby, you're safe!" She scooped up the girl and hugged her, the girl sat on her mother's belly. While the two were preoccupied he slipped on his helmet and transformed in to a human. The woman looked up at Alex, "Thank you for saving her!"
Alex felt a strange feeling of honour wash over him, disarming him. "Any time, ma'am"
"Jody." She smiled, "How can I repay you?"
"No payment needed."
"Abby, what do you say?" She queried her child, prompting her.
"Thank you, Ariel!" Abby beamed.
Alex felt oddly heartwarmed by the nickname.
"Ariel?" Jody chuckled, perplexed by the name.
"I have to be going." And with that Alex walked off the beach, hearing the faint echo cry out, "Mummy, he's really a mermaid!"

I am the player of José "Anima" Dartmoor of Gunpowder Roleplay : : : Sign Up Post | Gunpowder


Flying High

Age 22
In the skies
Seen September 9th, 2019
Posted September 6th, 2019
3,196 posts
8.4 Years
I still think every post I make is awful so yeah!

I less improved my writing, more learned how to RP.

Luckily no one is left who saw my first... foray into this crazy place


space adventure

Seen 4 Hours Ago
Posted 4 Hours Ago
33,107 posts
11.9 Years
I guess a little? Hm. I wasn't really young when I started RPing here so I can't blame being bad at English or something. Although, in general, I'd say my grasp of the language has improved and I know more words now haha.


Goodbye PC...for now.

Age 21
East Coast, USA (Represent!)
Seen February 5th, 2016
Posted September 23rd, 2015
2,480 posts
7.2 Years
I know that my writing style has improved as much as my ability to chain things together. I look back at my first post from two years ago (almost three) and I can't help but imagine what must've been going on in my head. If anything, I've learned how to "write smart," for a lack of better terms.
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