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hoshiko

Age 21
Non-binary
The Deep South
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
1,985 posts
9.5 Years
The town of Caliginosity. The moment you walk in, you're hit with fog in the air. All the streetlights are dim, broken, or making buzzing noises. You're consumed by darkness. Various rubble and broken sidewalks or roads surround you in various locations. You look around to see a group of people in tattered rags and baggy clothing, some even naked, all huddle around a weak fire in a trash can. A group of children run around teasing a blonde girl with pigtails for having glasses. There's one group in particular that stands out to you however. One that looks better and more cleaned up than the rest. It was a group of bikers, people in leather jackets and greased up hair. They rode around on their motorcycles creating dust in the air as they did so.

The other groups of various people appear to be frightened by them. You take a more in depth look around and notice that all the houses seem to be damaged in one way or another. Whether it be the windows being cracked, the door practically falling off because the hinges are missing, or ivy growing around the ruins these people call their home. You had heard from various people that this town wasn't the best. That it was rundown and wasn't even worth visiting. It wasn't the prime of it's youth as it once was. You thought they were all exaggerating but just from what you have seen already you knew they were telling the truth. The name of the town should've given it away but you were just so determined to know if they were telling the truth, your curiosity getting the best of you as usual. You sort of regret coming here. You squint your eyes and look around for anything that could signal a sort of downtown. You nod as you saw a sign that was barely standing up that read "Caliginosity Downtown". You start walking towards the sign and your eyes widen as you see many more buildings start to come into view.

You looked around and saw many more buildings that seem to be in just the same shape as the previous ones you saw, some even worse. One building in particular peeked your curiosity. You walked up to it and saw a burnt out unlit sign that read "Caliginosity Pizza!" And a motto below in white letters that read "The best pizza in a millennium!" The building was coated in an extremely faded red paint, barely even noticeable. You frown as you saw the shattered windows and counter filled with cobwebs and broken chairs scattered across the checkered floor. Tables toppled over and a barely lit light flickering on and off. You sigh in disappointment rattling your brain to think of what could've caused a supposed once brightly lit town to be thrown to such ruins out of nowhere. You keep walking around and saw even more various food places such as cafes, more pizzerias, and even dessert places, all shut down and in the same shape as the first pizza place. They were all basically broken and empty much like these people's hearts and souls of Caliginosity.

The more and more you walk around this broken town the more you realize those various people were right. You continue to walk around looking at the various broken windows and the kids running around. You check your watch on your wrist and see it read 7:00 at night. You could've figured as much as you saw the sun begin to set and twilight began to emerge. You wonder why the parents weren't taking any responsibility but from the looks of it it seemed like anything bad could happen even if you took precautions. You continue walking and find a building in worse condition than any of the other buildings you had come across. Plants were growing across the building, bricks were missing and windows were completely barren of glass. You look to find a sign and saw a battered sign, wiping off the dust to see faded text that read "Caliginosity School", and a motto below that read "Wildcats roar!" You chuckle thinking of the Wildcat mascot they must've used. Confusion began to arise as the school building was in such bad shape. If it was a school why was it in such bad shape? You shook your head and chalked it up to coincidence. You peer through the windows and see empty classrooms, not a surprise. There were many stolen things as well but that was not a surprise considering the same went for the buildings downtown.

You heave out a heavy and sad sigh and start to walk away until you hear a cry from inside the school. Your gut wrenched in heartbreak. Your gut told you to go and see what it was but you ignore it. You had heard rumors of a broken child in the school who barely survived day to day, living off crumbs and things he found off the trash. Rumor had it that he hadn't seen daylight in a good while. No one ever visited him because the parents told their children to avoid him, that he wasn't worth socializing with. You could hear the cries of the boy again and then a yelp from straining his voice. You had heard of this sort of society before.

A dystopian society. A messed up and broken society. Not perfect. One not meant for people to live in. You felt it was this way because of the harsh conditions of this place. You heard rumors from people saying that it had became this way because of the lack of a mayor or any sort of dictatorship, something to keep them in control. Other people said that it was due to a war that had happened eons ago and no one had the effort to fix the town to what it once was. You weren't sure what to believe. With how bad the conditions were in this town, you'd believe anything at this point. Whatever it was, it sure had made an impact. So many broken buildings all around the town. The dim lights representing the souls of Caliginosity. The brightness that was once in their souls, if ever, was gone. People ran around searching, yearning for their meaning to life by hurting others because it was the only thing the knew and were taught from the various people in the town.

You looked back at the broken town with a sigh.

"Goodbye Caliginosity. I hope one day you can find the brightness this town once had."
they/them ★ he/him ★ pashmina
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Bay

Darkinium Z

Female
Dani California
Seen 17 Hours Ago
Posted 17 Hours Ago
5,747 posts
13.4 Years
So this is a pretty somber piece there. Caliginosity does seem like a very broken town with many of the places not functioning anymore and the people lacking motivation to do anything. Not too different from the real life cities with bad crime and such. I wonder if some people eventually moved out to have a better life, or the majority just said to themselves what's the use and just did nothing.

A couple of your paragraphs I feel could benefit being broken down into smaller ones. For instance:

The other groups of various people appear to be frightened by them. You take a more in depth look around and notice that all the houses seem to be damaged in one way or another. Whether it be the windows being cracked, the door practically falling off because the hinges are missing, or ivy growing around the ruins these people call their home. You had heard from various people that this town wasn't the best. That it was rundown and wasn't even worth visiting. It wasn't the prime of it's youth as it once was. You thought they were all exaggerating but just from what you have seen already you knew they were telling the truth. The name of the town should've given it away but you were just so determined to know if they were telling the truth, your curiosity getting the best of you as usual. You sort of regret coming here. You squint your eyes and look around for anything that could signal a sort of downtown. You nod as you saw a sign that was barely standing up that read "Caliginosity Downtown". You start walking towards the sign and your eyes widen as you see many more buildings start to come into view.
You first talk about the neighborhoods being bad and then jump to downtown. Because of the different subjects, you can probably have the neighborhoods and downtown separate paragraphs.

Confusion began to arise as the school building was in such bad shape. If it was a school why was it in such bad shape? You shook your head and chalked it up to coincidence. You peer through the windows and see empty classrooms, not a surprise. There were many stolen things as well but that was not a surprise considering the same went for the buildings downtown.
I feel there's a bit repetition over mentioning the school being in bad shape and the conditions not being a surprise.

Overall I think this is a good short piece, glad to see your writings again!

Foul Play
[Chapter Nine up!]
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