Fan Fiction and Writing Have a story you want to share? Or in the mood to sit back and read one, instead? Then come hang out here!

Ad Content
Thread Tools
  #26   Link to this post, but load the entire thread.  
Old 3 Weeks Ago (2:05 PM). Edited 3 Weeks Ago by SorveteQuente.
SorveteQuente's Avatar
SorveteQuente SorveteQuente is offline
Donut enthusiast
    Join Date: Apr 2018
    Location: Brazil
    Age: 16
    Gender: Male
    Nature: Calm
    Posts: 406
    Wow, reading this made me inspired to write some fics to, you're doing a pretty good job so far. I'm still reading Chapter 4 and the atmosphere in Alola is very comfy from Grimsley's perspective, even though he's been through some funky stuff in the first few days there. Also, Acerola is a great character here.

    I felt like the start of the first chapter was a bit rushed, especially in the first Grimsley-Iris dialogue. I guess you didn't want to linger his trip to Alola too much, but I feel like you could do better with the dialogue. That's one of my few complaints though, and I guess the only major one.

    Looking forward to finishing Chapter 4 and reading the other ones, seems like you have posted the seventh one recently. Good luck with your story!
    Reply With Quote

    Quick Reply

    Join the conversation!

    Create an account to post a reply in this thread, participate in other discussions, and more!

    Create a PokéCommunity Account
    Ad Content
    Thread Tools

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is On
    HTML code is Off
    Minimum Characters Per Post: 25

    Forum Jump

    All times are GMT -8. The time now is 1:47 PM.