Fanfiction Lounge

both drama and melodrama are good ways of grabbing attention, but unexpected comparisons work as well ;) "The sky was the color of cat puke" from the Uglies.

In you opinion, what makes the first paragraph of a fictional good, or otherwise draw you in?

Hmm...well, there are three main ones I can think of. You can start by introducing a character - a more action-oriented opening, dialogue works well here to breathe life into the character within the first few lines of the fic. If you can make the reader interested in this character and what happens to them, you've probably got an audience hooked. You can start by introducing the setting - it's tough to explain, but certain atmospheres draw the reader in. (I'm using this to kick off T6W, describing Twinleaf Town on a stormy evening.) Or you can start by introducing the situation, which is often abused by new authors who want to sum up the history of their fic-verse in a Star Wars-like opening text. Good authors can actually pull this one off to amazing effect, via a history lesson or newspaper article...

But the fact remains that in order to attract a reader, you must introduce something significant and interesting in the beginning. Something that makes them want to read further, to find out why this character is in this situation, what that fleeting shadow across Saffron's rooftops is, who was responsible for the League's plummet, how the seemingly unrelated parts of the first chapter will intertwine throughout the fic's progression...

In you opinion, what makes the first paragraph of a fictional good, or otherwise draw you in?
Well, how I started NE is I actually did a little riddle/poem to have readers already know what's the overall story going to be about. After that though, I start off introducing the characters and already have their personalities shown somewhat.

Pretty much what introduction draws me in is if I know instantly the situation and characters are related to what the story's going to be about.

Attention grabbing openings, huh...?

This.

xD

In your opinion, what makes the first paragraph of a fiction good, or otherwise draw you in?

Well, I look for either a good description of the area/main character or simply jumping into the story and starting it off with, maybe, a battle or arguement. In AJYWSF (A Journey You Won't Soon Forget) I simply started by describing a seemingly normal morning in Twinleaf Town, although... it is just an OT fic. With my new fic, which is yet to be released, I start once again by describing the area... but, I am trying to pull readers in by saying that the stench of death filled the air. That kind of thing would certainly pull me into a story...

2. If you had to write a Pokémon self-insert into your fic, what Pokémon would you be?
A Treecko. ...*cough*

In your opinion, what makes the first paragraph of a fiction good, or otherwise draw you in?
I used an action-y, fast-paced prologue. What better to draw in readers?

What kind of beginning draws me in the most?

Ones that tell something interesting and ones that tell practically nothing. The first one is self-explanatory, but I guess the latter one needs some clarification.
You see, I like the kind of beginnings where you tell about something that's going on and the reader can't understand a word of it. It has to be done well to work: you have to have events interesting enough to keep the reader reading, yet leave all the important stuff untold. I expecially like it when the beginning happens a long time before the actual story, or maybe a long time after it, but still is crucial for the plot. You know, the beginning kind of gives you an idea of what this story might be like, and at some point of the story you suddently realize what it was all about and that you misunderstood it completely. I like that kind of openings and they really grab my attention. The only problem is that you can't really know if the beginning was actually good or not before you've finished the story...

This, for example, doesn't grab my attention:

Crystallina walked down a sunny slope. She was fourteen years old and had just left her home town for the first time in her life. She was tall for her age, had short, blond hair and blue eyes, and her skin was moderately tanned. She wore a peculiar golden pendant with a dark blue stone in it. She had gotten this pendant from her late great-grandmother whom she had loved very much. On the moment of her death, she had given the pendant to Crystallina, telling her it might come in handy if she was ever caught between a rock and a hard place. The pendant had a strange glow to it, even on a sunny such as the one Crystallina left her home town.

This does:

She gasped for air. The young boy looked at her with cold, emotionless eyes. His hair was eeriely blonde and his eyes were gray as little stones. How could she not remember a child looking like that? She had teached her class for more than three years, now, but she could not remember this boy. Yet she knew he was her student. One of the thirty children she looked after. The grey eyes seemed to penetrate her mind and thinking got harder by the minute. No, not only thirty children, she thought, I have a daughter of my own...
The thought of her daughter gave her strength and she threw the closest hard object at the boy.
"You will not have me," she yelled and tried to stand up.
The look on the boy's eyes got more intense. "I will have you," he said, without a single emotion on his face.
Her eyes couldn't see anymore when the hard object hit her head. She was falling into darkness, it was cold. I have to warn her, she thought, I can't die. I have to warn my daughter. I have to warn her...
These thoughts kept rotating in her mind until she slipped into nothingness and stopped thinking at all. The boy left the scene, still not showing a single emotion on his face.

In your opinion, what makes the first paragraph of a fiction good, or otherwise draw you in?
Good writing style, and starting right away with something that's happening instead of spending the first paragraph giving random background information or description of the main character.

I am on a quest to discover the best way to start a story. This is an example of one of the ways I attempted to start on an RP...

The ceiling tiles weren't square. Oh sure, they might look like it, but Taylor knew better. She had measured one of them the night before and it was four inches by four and a quarter inches. Not a square, a rectangle! It was driving her insane. Who in their right minds would use rectangles to tile a ceiling?

It tells you nothing... or does it? In this case it does nothing, I admit (I have no imagination, I was just bored :P) but it helps to delve into the mind of the character a bit.


Humor is also a good way to grab a reader near the beginning of a story:

"Tofu bacon?" Taylor asked. "Since when did you become a health nut?"

"Oh, I haven't dear," her aunt answered, sliding two slices of the super-bouncy-kinda-sorta-not-really-real bacon onto a plate with a Glameow's picture on it. "But there's just been that weird sickness going around with real bacon. All those kids heading out to get their starter Pokemon only to end up bedridden for the next few weeks..."


Not the best examples (I'm not the best writer...) but you get my point ;)

hey im working on my first fanfic (one that will relate to pokemon anyways) and i need some help
i just need a good start for lucario

Lucario Lvl: 100 said:

hey im working on my first fanfic (one that will relate to pokemon anyways) and i need some help
i just need a good start for lucario

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...

It looks like you've got a lot of thinking to do. If you don't have a creative idea to start out with, don't even bother. No one's going to write your story for you. We can help you with grammar, or give you advice about flow and description, but your story has to start with your ideas.

Why are all the best sections so dead? ;_;

I think I might frequent here, seeing as I LOVE to write. 8D
But I can't stand writing fanfics x_x

I tend to write stories without happy endings, one of which I might post today....Maybe >_>

For your topic, Mira, here's a few of my favorite opening lines I've written:

I want nothing more than to die. I need to feel the pain you felt as you saved me. When you saved me from the failure that I am.

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The fic that this is from goes on to show how the character feels like a failure and why. And also, the reader wonders who the "you" is that the character is talking to.

There was a definite difference.

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And this line comes from a short fic where the character compares and contrasts the way he feels towards two different characters and how they make him feel.

And yeah, those are my best opening lines. =D Not really really good, but they get the job done for the fics they came from.

ummmmm...... am i in the wright place

mr_maper said:

ummmmm...... am i in the wright place

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Depends on what you're trying to find.

The Wright place, however, I'm afraid you're about a century late, give or take. *rimshot*

The Silver Mark Trilogy

This is original trilogy idea that has been collecting dust in my brain for the last couple months. I developed the idea for a long while before having it lost in the chaos of school. I'm not sure exactly how to summarize them, but I'll do my best.



World/History:
Within this book is a world not unlike our own, yet there is one simple difference: it is a world of Faeries. A world in which there is great wonder and Power and the gaining of wings marks the coming of age of a young adult. Ruling over this land is the Light Faerie; a Faerie who is appointed to be king or queen by the Power he is born with and granted every Type in order to protect him or herself from any opposing threat.
But one man grew jealous of the Light Faerie's Power and set out to make a perversion of it for himself. He captured and killed each Type of elemental Faerie and cut open his own Power Mark, sacrificing the Power he had been given in order to gain a dark strength second only to that of the Light Faerie. The first Dark Faerie had been created. He set out to infiltrate the castle and killed the Light Faerie.
Immediately after, something happened to the Power. It seemed to grow weaker and did not emerge in every human. Those that did not have Power or wings were called Thin Bloods. They were hated by the Faeries and were forced to work in factories and live in Thin Blood complexes. It is unknown whether it was the death of the Light Faerie or the creating of the Dark Faerie that caused the Time of the Thinning, but the Thin Bloods were pushed aside as a horrible reminder of the Power's corruption.
But then emerged a new Faerie of unknown Power. It was labeled as a sort of defense mechanism for the Power, protecting the Light Faerie at all costs from the rising Dark Faeries.
The Mind Faerie.


Story: (rough draft summaries)

The Mind:
As soon as Sylvia is proven to be a Faerie, she is sent off to F.W.A. to be schooled for what Type of Power she has, as is the custom for every 15-year-old in their world. But as soon as she is tested, Sylvia finds herself thrown into a hidden struggle between the corruption of the Power and those who were born to protect it, her Power being the one thing that could gain victory on either side once and for all. The Dark secrets of the true Thinning are revealed to her, secrets that call for her to protect her cousin, Conner, from the Faeries that want him dead at all costs. Secrets that give her two choices: protect the Power, or die trying.

The Blood:
Sylvia is now 17, nearing the end of her formal F.W.A. education to be trained full time by her mentor, Fay Zoller. But among the Dark there is a plan. A plan to eliminate the problem of Thin Blood once and for all, but the plan involves an evil process written down by the first Dark Faerie hundreds of years ago when its mistake was made clear. Now Sylvia has to stop their plan, and one mistake turns the tables on her, trapping her and making her a part of it. Is she willing to work with them in order to end the Thinning, or allow many to die in vain?

The Power:
A new Mind Fairy has been discovered named Natasha, which spells trouble for Sylvia, who has long since "retired," and the Power. Natasha goes off on a mission of her own while Sylvia ventures to Sean's property, looking for his remaining possessions, but she finds a whole lot more than she could have ever feared in her worse nightmare. Now Sylvia has to go on a mission of her own to halt the Dark Faeries' mad attempt for revenge, which has consequences much steeper than anyone could have ever imagined.



comments anyone? Or perhaps a nice cup of hot chocolate (:P)

Badum ppiiiiisssh.

Or something like that. Nyah, I haven't been on here in a week. I have things to catch up on.

Hey, since this is the Pokemon FANFICTION LOUNGE, why doesn't DG ask another question?

Sure, O Faithful Italics!

Ah... um... hold on, I have to think of a question.
[*cue five minutes later*]
AH-HA! Has anyone ever put a Wobuffet in their stories before?

Has anyone ever put a Wobuffet in their stories before?
No, but I will make it a point to do so in the near future.

AH-HA! Has anyone ever put a Wobuffet in their stories before?

Sooooooonansu! Nope, I haven't. I've put two of those on the shelf above my desk, though, and our cats keep kicking them down. Is that epic enough to count? But, yeah, I haven't had one of those in my fics. I had a Muk with an Oxford English accent to fill the role Wobbuffet would've had.

But, well, there are roughly 470 Pokémon that have not appeared in my fics, so it's not a very suprising fact. I am still very new to this.

Have any of you put a Sentret in any of your fics?

I have! *waves her hand in the air* He was caught by April and is called Twiggy. He didn't have a flamethrower, though. Yet.

At last! Life!

DGexe said:

Badum ppiiiiisssh.

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*bow*

AH-HA! Has anyone ever put a Wobuffet in their stories before?

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I haven't, but I really should. Wobbuffet is inherently hilarious.

And because we really need to spam the crap out of this thread even more:

Your characters decide to have a nice, rousing game of Dungeons and Dragons. What characters do they play, and which one is the Dungeon Master?

Race and class, of course.

And extra points if you make this as geeky or amusing as possible.