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  #2376    
Old February 29th, 2012 (4:30 PM). Edited February 29th, 2012 by Alice.
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Alice Alice is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
But back to what you were saying before. Do you really think your dreams were telling you things? I had quite a few dreams from as long back as I can remember where I was all 100% biologically a girl, but I've talked with straight, cisgender friends and a lot of them have had dreams where they were boys or girls or had homosexual images and such. It seems kinda common, at least from what I've heard. Maybe that's just the people who were okay telling me though.
Eh, well honestly no... not really. Especially considering it's the first dream I've had about it. I have thought about it irl on several occasions though, and determined that I was not. I mean I don't act feminine in the slightest, but I'll admit I've been a little curious for awhile now... and I catch myself glancing over at the girl's clothes section on occasion. Stuff like that. I do think that it is possible for dreams to tell you about things that you aren't consciously aware of, though I don't think this is likely to be one of those cases. The dream was too silly. :P (I mean in the other case I mentioned, I was literally having nightmares about having sex with girls, even though I thought I was straight. lol)

I also do find trans girls (Is there a better term for it? lol) very attractive. Much much much much much more so than regular girls. So, that also may be the reason for it. (That wasn't what the dream was about though. It was specifically about becoming one, not getting in their pants... or skirts rather. Though I will admit that I had a second dream in the same day that was about getting in their skirts... so to speak. lol)

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  #2377    
Old February 29th, 2012 (4:48 PM).
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Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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OK guys, listen up.

I haven't been totally honest with any of you. I've given you all the impression over the last nearly a year since this LGBT Club has been running that I was 'out'. The truth is that while all my friends and my uncle and aunt (who are the only extended family we actually speak to) know the truth, my parents and sister do not.

When I joined the LGBT Club there were people joining who were far younger than me who were already completely out and proud, and so I thought "God, I'm 20 and I'm still in the closet, how pathetic is that". I was ashamed, so I decided to just say that I was out in the hope that I soon would be and I wouldn't be lying for long. Also, I don't have the smoothest of relationships with my family and try to avoid them as far as possible anyway, so I don't consider their reaction of all that much importance to me - my not telling them is more an exercise in drama avoidance than actual fear of what they think of me - so in my mind, since the people I do care about knowing already know, in my mind I am out. But after a conversation I just had with the one person from PC to whom I did tell the truth at the time, it feels wrong to keep up the illusion. And since I've become the owner of the club in the meantime, it feels extra wrong to keep lying to you.

So while I do feel like I'm out of the closet and live that way most of the time, technically I'm not. I feel really foolish and I'm really sorry I lied to you all; I hope that this doesn't change the friendships I've made here.
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  #2378    
Old February 29th, 2012 (5:04 PM).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
OK guys, listen up.

I haven't been totally honest with any of you. I've given you all the impression over the last nearly a year since this LGBT Club has been running that I was 'out'. The truth is that while all my friends and my uncle and aunt (who are the only extended family we actually speak to) know the truth, my parents and sister do not.

When I joined the LGBT Club there were people joining who were far younger than me who were already completely out and proud, and so I thought "God, I'm 20 and I'm still in the closet, how pathetic is that". I was ashamed, so I decided to just say that I was out in the hope that I soon would be and I wouldn't be lying for long. Also, I don't have the smoothest of relationships with my family and try to avoid them as far as possible anyway, so I don't consider their reaction of all that much importance to me - my not telling them is more an exercise in drama avoidance than actual fear of what they think of me - so in my mind, since the people I do care about knowing already know, in my mind I am out. But after a conversation I just had with the one person from PC to whom I did tell the truth at the time, it feels wrong to keep up the illusion. And since I've become the owner of the club in the meantime, it feels extra wrong to keep lying to you.

So while I do feel like I'm out of the closet and live that way most of the time, technically I'm not. I feel really foolish and I'm really sorry I lied to you all; I hope that this doesn't change the friendships I've made here.
My opinion? Don't worry about it! And besides, you're more out than I am so I would consider you to be officially out, especially compared to me. xD

So yeah, no worries man. -nods-
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  #2379    
Old February 29th, 2012 (5:09 PM). Edited February 29th, 2012 by Alice.
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Alice Alice is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
OK guys, listen up.

I haven't been totally honest with any of you. I've given you all the impression over the last nearly a year since this LGBT Club has been running that I was 'out'. The truth is that while all my friends and my uncle and aunt (who are the only extended family we actually speak to) know the truth, my parents and sister do not.

When I joined the LGBT Club there were people joining who were far younger than me who were already completely out and proud, and so I thought "God, I'm 20 and I'm still in the closet, how pathetic is that". I was ashamed, so I decided to just say that I was out in the hope that I soon would be and I wouldn't be lying for long. Also, I don't have the smoothest of relationships with my family and try to avoid them as far as possible anyway, so I don't consider their reaction of all that much importance to me - my not telling them is more an exercise in drama avoidance than actual fear of what they think of me - so in my mind, since the people I do care about knowing already know, in my mind I am out. But after a conversation I just had with the one person from PC to whom I did tell the truth at the time, it feels wrong to keep up the illusion. And since I've become the owner of the club in the meantime, it feels extra wrong to keep lying to you.

So while I do feel like I'm out of the closet and live that way most of the time, technically I'm not. I feel really foolish and I'm really sorry I lied to you all; I hope that this doesn't change the friendships I've made here.
No way, that doesn't change a thing. I always say that I'm out, because I've told everyone that's important to me, (In my case that's just my parents, and no other family members.) and I honestly kind of think that that's all that matters. So, you're more out than I am, honestly. lol
  #2380    
Old February 29th, 2012 (8:23 PM).
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    after coming out I definately changed, I think I lost some of the self esteem I once had, that was the biggest change, since I basically became a human welcome mat :(
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      #2381    
    Old February 29th, 2012 (11:46 PM).
    Alice's Avatar
    Alice Alice is offline
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
    Eh, well honestly no... not really. Especially considering it's the first dream I've had about it. I have thought about it irl on several occasions though, and determined that I was not. I mean I don't act feminine in the slightest, but I'll admit I've been a little curious for awhile now... and I catch myself glancing over at the girl's clothes section on occasion. Stuff like that. I do think that it is possible for dreams to tell you about things that you aren't consciously aware of, though I don't think this is likely to be one of those cases. The dream was too silly. :P (I mean in the other case I mentioned, I was literally having nightmares about having sex with girls, even though I thought I was straight. lol)

    I also do find trans girls (Is there a better term for it? lol) very attractive. Much much much much much more so than regular girls. So, that also may be the reason for it. (That wasn't what the dream was about though. It was specifically about becoming one, not getting in their pants... or skirts rather. Though I will admit that I had a second dream in the same day that was about getting in their skirts... so to speak. lol)
    Just thought of something more to add...

    This may seem really odd, but when I was younger (I recall I was playing WoW while thinking about it at one point, and I started that in 06 or 07, so I was at least 14/15, but more likely 16 or 17. Yes, my mind works in very strange ways sometimes. lol) I used to want to be gay for some reason. It makes absolutely no sense, but I actively wished I were a girl, so I could be gay without having to like guys. (And yet, I somehow ended up liking guys after all.)

    I don't know either. I'm just weird. I say that I'm content with being gay and all that stuff, but I don't understand one bit of it... I'm just going with the flow, lol. I really need to stop talking about this stuff though, because it's making me remember things like this, which totally undermines me saying that I used to be 100% straight (or maybe it doesn't, because I still wanted to like girls?)... but I had honestly completely forgotten.

    Anyway, I'm gonna go to bed now, before my brain explodes.
      #2382    
    Old March 1st, 2012 (6:28 AM).
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    Briar Briar is offline
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      seeing as a lot of people have already shared some of their personal, lgbtq-related experiences here, i do feel a bit obliged to share news of my own.
      just today, we've had our university student council elections... and guess who was voted as the next school year's chairperson (student council president, if you will) and vice chairperson ("vice president")? a transgirl and an openly bisexual girl.
      i, of course, know that my university's quite broad-minded, but it's really news like these (proud members of the lgbtq community claiming influential positions) that give me hope for change.


      Quote:
      Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
      Also, I have a question... After coming out, did you change at all?
      no, not really. i've only technically come out to only two of my friends, so... yeah.
      i guess i've only been talking more openly about how i find other girls attractive?
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        #2383    
      Old March 1st, 2012 (9:44 AM).
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      Esper Esper is offline
       
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
      I also do find trans girls (Is there a better term for it? lol) very attractive. Much much much much much more so than regular girls. So, that also may be the reason for it. (That wasn't what the dream was about though. It was specifically about becoming one, not getting in their pants... or skirts rather. Though I will admit that I had a second dream in the same day that was about getting in their skirts... so to speak. lol)
      I love that you find trans girls attractive. You have no idea how good it feels (well, maybe you do, lol). I wish there were more of you out there. Wait, maybe there are.

      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
      OK guys, listen up.

      I haven't been totally honest with any of you. I've given you all the impression over the last nearly a year since this LGBT Club has been running that I was 'out'. The truth is that while all my friends and my uncle and aunt (who are the only extended family we actually speak to) know the truth, my parents and sister do not.

      When I joined the LGBT Club there were people joining who were far younger than me who were already completely out and proud, and so I thought "God, I'm 20 and I'm still in the closet, how pathetic is that". I was ashamed, so I decided to just say that I was out in the hope that I soon would be and I wouldn't be lying for long. Also, I don't have the smoothest of relationships with my family and try to avoid them as far as possible anyway, so I don't consider their reaction of all that much importance to me - my not telling them is more an exercise in drama avoidance than actual fear of what they think of me - so in my mind, since the people I do care about knowing already know, in my mind I am out. But after a conversation I just had with the one person from PC to whom I did tell the truth at the time, it feels wrong to keep up the illusion. And since I've become the owner of the club in the meantime, it feels extra wrong to keep lying to you.

      So while I do feel like I'm out of the closet and live that way most of the time, technically I'm not. I feel really foolish and I'm really sorry I lied to you all; I hope that this doesn't change the friendships I've made here.
      I wouldn't worry about not being 'out' if it doesn't cause you stress or other problems. As much as it's a part of who you are, it's not like everyone you know and talk to has to know every detail about you, right? Since we're getting all confessional I want to say that I'm not out either, at least to most people I talk to. I never really say clearly much about myself, but I'm only really honest with a few close people. When I'm out in the world, at work or whatever, I'm essentially a guy and I don't make any attempt to make people think otherwise, not really. All of my girl clothes I wear only around the house. The most I usually do in public is wear nail polish. Nail polish. That's how much I'm out to the world. It does, sometimes, make me sad, but for the most part I try to just enjoy what I do have and be who I want to be in the privacy of my own space.

      Quote:
      Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
      Just thought of something more to add...

      This may seem really odd, but when I was younger (I recall I was playing WoW while thinking about it at one point, and I started that in 06 or 07, so I was at least 14/15, but more likely 16 or 17. Yes, my mind works in very strange ways sometimes. lol) I used to want to be gay for some reason. It makes absolutely no sense, but I actively wished I were a girl, so I could be gay without having to like guys. (And yet, I somehow ended up liking guys after all.)

      I don't know either. I'm just weird. I say that I'm content with being gay and all that stuff, but I don't understand one bit of it... I'm just going with the flow, lol. I really need to stop talking about this stuff though, because it's making me remember things like this, which totally undermines me saying that I used to be 100% straight (or maybe it doesn't, because I still wanted to like girls?)... but I had honestly completely forgotten.

      Anyway, I'm gonna go to bed now, before my brain explodes.
      Yes. Go with the flow. Don't worry about whether you were straight or not straight or anything like that. Almost no one falls into categories perfectly, you know?
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        #2384    
      Old March 1st, 2012 (11:54 AM). Edited March 2nd, 2012 by Alice.
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
      I love that you find trans girls attractive. You have no idea how good it feels (well, maybe you do, lol). I wish there were more of you out there. Wait, maybe there are.
      You're number one in my book. :P

      But yeah, I know a ton of people online who do, actually. Though, I met them on a forum specifically for people who like trans girls, so that's not surprising. lol


      Also, flow-going is now commencing.

      I might look into it more when I'm able to do it privately, (So, never.) and I'll just try not to worry about it until then. Though, I think the fact that I'm thinking about it in the first place, must mean something.
        #2385    
      Old March 2nd, 2012 (3:33 AM).
      Shining Raichu's Avatar
      Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Scarf
      When I'm out in the world, at work or whatever, I'm essentially a guy and I don't make any attempt to make people think otherwise, not really. All of my girl clothes I wear only around the house. The most I usually do in public is wear nail polish. Nail polish. That's how much I'm out to the world. It does, sometimes, make me sad, but for the most part I try to just enjoy what I do have and be who I want to be in the privacy of my own space.
      Really? I'm not sure why but I always assumed you'd long completed the transition. I've always thought of you as a girl anyway; not even necessarily a trans girl. You've always been a girl in my head and not even that piece of information changes anything. So there's that, for what it's worth :)

      Also, thanks to everyone for their understanding about my lying etc :)
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        #2386    
      Old March 2nd, 2012 (4:09 AM).
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      TwiDragon TwiDragon is offline
      The fun shawl be doubled!
         
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        Oh Scarf, your trans too~
        Intresting, xD

        I thought I was trans a week ago, but that wasn't the case for me. However, I'd be happy to take the offer of a trans-women/girl to be my bride. I'm polysexual, so it doesn't matter; however I can imagine myself in a better understanding with a transgendered person, as I do like to crossdress still c:

        What can I say, skirts, dresses, stockings, make-up, and all that is fun. (I kind of confused this with being trans ._. )
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          #2387    
        Old March 2nd, 2012 (8:56 AM).
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        Esper Esper is offline
         
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        I turned the thread into a pity party for me. Bleh. :<

        So let me turn things around an announce, in case you haven't heard, that here in the good ol' US of A we have another state that's legalized gay marriage. Everyone give a warm round of applause to the great state of Maryland!



        But there is reason to be cautious. The legion of bigots is going to try to collect signatures to get a ballot measure approved so they can scramble to get enough time to poison as many media outlets as they can with their hate before the elections in November when they hope people will vote to take away this right. Kinda like what happened to my beloved California 4 almost years ago.
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          #2388    
        Old March 2nd, 2012 (9:56 AM).
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        TornZero TornZero is offline
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          ._. I REALLY need to post more. I've been missin' out.

          @Shining Raichu, we still love you all the same, and you're still more out than plenty of us, myself included.

          @QuilavaKing, I have to agree with Scarf. It's great to know there are people attracted to trans-people. Pie for you, or cake if you prefer.

          @Maryland, congrats and keep it up!
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            #2389    
          Old March 2nd, 2012 (12:16 PM). Edited March 2nd, 2012 by Alice.
          Alice's Avatar
          Alice Alice is offline
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by TornZero View Post
          @QuilavaKing, I have to agree with Scarf. It's great to know there are people attracted to trans-people. Pie for you, or cake if you prefer.
          Cake Please. :D

          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
          Really? I'm not sure why but I always assumed you'd long completed the transition. I've always thought of you as a girl anyway; not even necessarily a trans girl. You've always been a girl in my head and not even that piece of information changes anything. So there's that, for what it's worth :)
          Yeah, same here. lol

          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
          I turned the thread into a pity party for me. Bleh. :<
          All parties are fun. Pity or otherwise. :P (Besides, I have several pages of this thread dedicated to me, lol. >.>)

          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
          So let me turn things around an announce, in case you haven't heard, that here in the good ol' US of A we have another state that's legalized gay marriage. Everyone give a warm round of applause to the great state of Maryland!
          I love how all these states are legalizing it all at once. Surely this is making a huge impact on other states' opinions.
            #2390    
          Old March 2nd, 2012 (3:29 PM).
          Shining Raichu's Avatar
          Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by Scarf
          But there is reason to be cautious. The legion of bigots is going to try to collect signatures to get a ballot measure approved so they can scramble to get enough time to poison as many media outlets as they can with their hate before the elections in November when they hope people will vote to take away this right. Kinda like what happened to my beloved California 4 almost years ago
          I thought all the crap going on in California was meant to take away people's ability to vote on the rights of minorities because it's unconstitutional. I realise that what happens in California has no bearing in Maryland, but surely the bigots of Maryland can watch or read the news and see what happens when people try to pull that crap. You'd think people would be smarter or at least more gunshy trying to use a tactic that is being smacked down as we speak.
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            #2391    
          Old March 2nd, 2012 (4:26 PM).
          Victini
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            M-may I join your lovely club...?

            I'm in high admiration of groups like these... I really love that you've thrown discrimination out the window here and are open and accepting about yourselves and others...

            I wish there were more people in the world like all of you amazing individuals here... ♥
              #2392    
            Old March 2nd, 2012 (4:29 PM).
            Shining Raichu's Avatar
            Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
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            Of course, Victini! Welcome aboard! If there were more individuals like us then there'd be no need for groups like these, because being without discrimination would be the norm XD
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              #2393    
            Old March 2nd, 2012 (4:33 PM).
            Victini
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              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
              Of course, Victini! Welcome aboard! If there were more individuals like us then there'd be no need for groups like these, because being without discrimination would be the norm XD
              Thank you!!

              There w-would still be discrimination in a place like that... but if there were more people like you all, it would make the world much easier to live in. ^/////^
                #2394    
              Old March 2nd, 2012 (5:19 PM).
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              Sydian Sydian is offline
              la justice
               
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              Yay, more Tini members! :3 And Andy, if that's how you consider yourself to be out, then there's no shame in it. tbh, that sounds pretty out to me, lol. So yeah, like the rest of the club, I say no worries. :)
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                #2395    
              Old March 2nd, 2012 (6:47 PM). Edited March 3rd, 2012 by Victini.
              Victini
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                Quote:
                Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
                After coming out, did you change at all?
                Ooh, I thought I would go ahead and answer the topic at hand for myself...

                I always knew what I was... there was just never a name for it until recently.. and honestly I haven't changed in the slightest, even upon discovering it... I've always been very open about myself in that category. Weirdly enough, no one has ever made a critical remark towards me about it...

                .. I feel bad receiving that fortune when many have been way less fortunate...
                  #2396    
                Old March 2nd, 2012 (7:33 PM).
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                Alice Alice is offline
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                Welcome to the group Victini!

                You never actually mentioned what category you fall under though. Would you care to share it with us? :)
                  #2397    
                Old March 2nd, 2012 (7:55 PM).
                Victini
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                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
                  Welcome to the group Victini!

                  You never actually mentioned what category you fall under though. Would you care to share it with us? :)

                  Ooh shucks, my bad... ;;

                  Uhm, I'm what they call a Gray-A...

                  But I haven't found myself particularly feeling physical attraction at any point... I'm a little bit wonky. /////////
                    #2398    
                  Old March 3rd, 2012 (10:36 AM).
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                  Esper Esper is offline
                   
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                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by Victini View Post
                  Ooh, I thought I would go ahead and answer the topic at hand for myself...

                  I always knew what I was... there was just never a name for it until recently.. and honestly I haven't changed in the slightest, even upon discovering it... I've always been very open about myself in that category. Weirdly enough, no one has ever made a critical remark towards me about it...

                  .. I feel bad receiving that fortune when many have been way less fortunate...
                  We don't begrudge you if you had an easy coming out and found acceptance. It's what everyone wants, sure, but if we got mad at you for that we'd be no better than the people who aren't accepting us, you know?
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                    #2399    
                  Old March 3rd, 2012 (10:48 AM).
                  Kano Shuuya's Avatar
                  Kano Shuuya Kano Shuuya is offline
                  → you're here, aren't you?
                   
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                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by Victini View Post
                  Ooh shucks, my bad... ;;

                  Uhm, I'm what they call a Gray-A...

                  But I haven't found myself particularly feeling physical attraction at any point... I'm a little bit wonky. /////////
                  Oh, interesting, I'd never heard of that term before.

                  Sounds a bit like me, only I'd say I'm more demisexual..

                  I don't really care, I've stopped using labels at this point. I'm naturally attracted to females, can mentally crush on guys, and my sex drive is near nothing. XD; I give up on labels.

                  Also, I wouldn't call yourself wonky, Victini, what you are has a definition so it's just as normal as other definition that we fall under. -w-
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                    #2400    
                  Old March 3rd, 2012 (2:26 PM).
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                  Phantom Phantom is offline
                  Uh, I didn't do it
                   
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                  Nature: Brave
                  Posts: 1,186
                  Labels make things confusing. Try explaining to a parent that you're a biromantic asexual. Go ahead. Try it. They give you funny looks.
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