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  #1351    
Old November 5th, 2011 (1:39 PM).
-ty-'s Avatar
-ty- -ty- is offline
Don't Ask, Just Tell
     
    Join Date: Oct 2009
    Location: USA
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    It's hard for me to say exactly what you should do. From my own experience, my sexuality was clear, although it was hard coming to terms with it, I knew for sure I was 100% gay.

    Are you sexually/physically attracted to your girlfriend?
    Have you had "homoerotic" thoughts before?
    Also, bisexual individuals often time are more attracted to one sex over the other, though not always; do you have a preference?

    Assuming that your are either equally attracted to both or a bit more attracted to woman, I would have to say that when you are in a committed relationship, as long as you are attracted to your gf/bf physically/sexually, then there should not be a need to talk about your sexuality. I know that even gay men feel insecure when they discover or know that there boyfriend/partner/husband is bisexual. It makes a person feel like you may not be sexually attracted to them. In addition, although your girlfriend may be very supportive of the LGBT community, it may not translate to a relationship. For example, many people who are supportive of LGBT individuals may not feel comfortable dating a transgender person. Although they are advocates of transgender people's rights, they may not be attracted to the idea of dating them.

    I am sorry this is so long, and a bit all-over-the-place, but these were the initial thoughts that came up in my head.
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      #1352    
    Old November 5th, 2011 (1:52 PM).
    deoxys121's Avatar
    deoxys121 deoxys121 is offline
    White Kyurem Cometh
     
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
    It's hard for me to say exactly what you should do. From my own experience, my sexuality was clear, although it was hard coming to terms with it, I knew for sure I was 100% gay.

    Are you sexually/physically attracted to your girlfriend?
    Have you had "homoerotic" thoughts before?
    Also, bisexual individuals often time are more attracted to one sex over the other, though not always; do you have a preference?

    Assuming that your are either equally attracted to both or a bit more attracted to woman, I would have to say that when you are in a committed relationship, as long as you are attracted to your gf/bf physically/sexually, then there should not be a need to talk about your sexuality. I know that even gay men feel insecure when they discover or know that there boyfriend/partner/husband is bisexual. It makes a person feel like you may not be sexually attracted to them. In addition, although your girlfriend may be very supportive of the LGBT community, it may not translate to a relationship. For example, many people who are supportive of LGBT individuals may not feel comfortable dating a transgender person. Although they are advocates of transgender people's rights, they may not be attracted to the idea of dating them.

    I am sorry this is so long, and a bit all-over-the-place, but these were the initial thoughts that came up in my head.
    Well, I'm definitely still attracted to my girlfriend on all levels, physically, sexually, and emotionally. As far as "homoerotic" thoughts... well, I won't go into graphic detail, but yes. Since I had that dream (about a week ago), I have had thoughts of that nature come into my head, and when it comes to the level of arousal yielded by such thoughts, it's similar to the sexual thoughts about my girlfriend, and women in general. Since I'm so emotionally attached to my girlfriend, that emotional attachment makes the thoughts about her seem more pleasing, though. And as far as not talking about it, as I said before, we have promised to never keep any sort of secrets.
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      #1353    
    Old November 6th, 2011 (5:27 AM).
    U.Flame's Avatar
    U.Flame U.Flame is offline
    Meowna Fan
     
    Join Date: Jun 2008
    Location: Sapphire City in future Hoenn
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    I love it when games make gay references. I was playing Tales of the Abyss and in Baticul Port, a woman is always talking about General Celceil's beauty and obsesses about t her safety. This woman also wants to "Be born as a man." Also many other hints of attraction. I wonder if they ever get together?
    __________________
    Hacks I'm working on:
    Pokemon Sapphire Hoenn's Rebirth - My own hack, making progress whenever possible.
    3rd Gen Multiplayer Project - Research and development, occasionally testing, sometimes with support.
    Pokemon Cursed/Creepy White - Group project, on hiatus for now with plans to return eventually.
    Animal Crossing Wild World playing as an animal - experimental, messing with models and textures

    Hacks I've worked on in the past:
    Pokemon Ruby Destiny Broken Timeline (pre-reboot) - Assisted with maps
    Pokemon HeartGold Prince Boo Edition - Experimental project with three small changes. Made at the request of YouTube LPer PrinceBoo21.

    Been super busy with work, life, and laptop problems. Hopefully I can get back into it soon, I fear I'm already rusty. Meanwhile I'm considering writing some of my hacks as a series of fanfics.

    Times I've been ninja'd: 18
    Times I've ninja'd people: 3
      #1354    
    Old November 6th, 2011 (5:32 AM).
    Shining Raichu's Avatar
    Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
    Expect me like you expect Jesus.
     
    Join Date: Feb 2011
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    It seems to be a theme in a lot of new video games lately that there is a gay storyline - or at least an option for one. I am not a huge gamer myself, but my best friend is. She often tells me about her gay relationships in Dragon Age and an assortment of other games, as well as her plans to pursue a gay relationship in the new game Skyrim which comes out next week lol
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      #1355    
    Old November 6th, 2011 (6:05 AM).
    Sap Sipper's Avatar
    Sap Sipper Sap Sipper is offline
    Terrified of Bad Luck.
       
      Join Date: Nov 2011
      Location: Miss Doronjo's head.
      Age: 23
      Gender: Male
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      I guess I could join? I fall into the bisexual/gay category (I don't even know - that's kinda strange).

      And I have nothing to say that would make this post seem less bland.
        #1356    
      Old November 6th, 2011 (6:08 AM).
      Shining Raichu's Avatar
      Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
      Expect me like you expect Jesus.
       
      Join Date: Feb 2011
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      Age: 27
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      That's okay, if you're ever at a loss for something to say you can always just join in whatever we're talking about or go back and answer some of the million questions we've asked throughout the pages (they're almost always written in bold XD)

      But either way, welcome to the club! I'll add your name to the member list now :)
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        #1357    
      Old November 6th, 2011 (4:21 PM). Edited November 6th, 2011 by -ty-.
      -ty-'s Avatar
      -ty- -ty- is offline
      Don't Ask, Just Tell
         
        Join Date: Oct 2009
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        Quote:
        Originally Posted by deoxys121 View Post

        Well, I'm definitely still attracted to my girlfriend on all levels, physically, sexually, and emotionally. As far as "homoerotic" thoughts... well, I won't go into graphic detail, but yes. Since I had that dream (about a week ago), I have had thoughts of that nature come into my head, and when it comes to the level of arousal yielded by such thoughts, it's similar to the sexual thoughts about my girlfriend, and women in general. Since I'm so emotionally attached to my girlfriend, that emotional attachment makes the thoughts about her seem more pleasing, though. And as far as not talking about it, as I said before, we have promised to never keep any sort of secrets.
        Sorry if it sounded like you have no choice but to hide information about your sexuality from your girlfriend. I think that when you tell her some of your feeling about it you should really reaffirm her about not only your emotional/romantic feeling for her, but your sexual/physical attraction toward her. Since she seems really nice and excepting she may not let you know if it makes her feel insecure or the extent to which it may make her feel insecure, so I think it's best if you really emphasize that attraction that you have for her still, and that she is the only one that you want to be with. I hope it goes well!


        Although this is not a LGBT-exclusive question, I thought it would be interesting, and Freaky+other heterosexual individuals can have an opportunity to answer.
        What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?


        I am 19. And I would say that 20 is my minimum, and 28 is my maximum.
        I don't like dating anyone younger than I am for some reason, but I don't want a "sugar daddy" by any means. :/
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        !

          #1358    
        Old November 6th, 2011 (4:40 PM).
        TornZero's Avatar
        TornZero TornZero is offline
        Resident Yuri-ism Cult Leader
           
          Join Date: Apr 2010
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          Age: 25
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
          Although this is not a LGBT-exclusive question, I thought it would be interesting, and Freaky+other heterosexual individuals can have an opportunity to answer.
          What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?
          I'm 18. I prefer the people I date being within about 2-3 years of my own age.
          __________________

          I will be moving my account to Songbird over the course of immediately. The signature will stay as is for posterity and reference.
            #1359    
          Old November 6th, 2011 (4:51 PM).
          FreakyLocz14's Avatar
          FreakyLocz14 FreakyLocz14 is offline
          Conservative Patriot
           
          Join Date: Jun 2009
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
          Although this is not a LGBT-exclusive question, I thought it would be interesting, and Freaky+other heterosexual individuals can have an opportunity to answer.
          What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?
          I'm 21. Minimum is 18 for legal purposes. Maximum? I don't really have one. Some older guys are younger looking, but they should generally be in their 20's.
            #1360    
          Old November 6th, 2011 (4:52 PM).
          Alice's Avatar
          Alice Alice is offline
          (>^.(>0.0)>
           
          Join Date: Mar 2009
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
          What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?
          I'm 19. I would prefer that they're younger than me, so like 16-19. I look like I'm like 15 myself though, so I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I wouldn't actually go for someone in high school though, just because they're way too annoying on average. lol

          So I guess 18-19.
            #1361    
          Old November 6th, 2011 (5:20 PM).
          Esper's Avatar
          Esper Esper is offline
           
          Join Date: Jun 2009
          Location: California
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          Quote:
          Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
          In addition, although your girlfriend may be very supportive of the LGBT community, it may not translate to a relationship. For example, many people who are supportive of LGBT individuals may not feel comfortable dating a transgender person. Although they are advocates of transgender people's rights, they may not be attracted to the idea of dating them.
          While very true, there are still people who will surprise you in a good way. :)

          Quote:
          Originally Posted by -ty- View Post
          What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?/
          While I don't have a problem with the idea of dating someone much younger or older than I am, I don't think I would have as much in common with someone who's 18 as I would with someone who is 21 or 25. I'm actually dating someone several years older than me, but I could see myself hypothetically dating someone even older if it were the right person.

          Then again, I don't like the whole sugar daddy thing either.
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            #1362    
          Old November 6th, 2011 (8:08 PM).
          Shining Raichu's Avatar
          Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
          Expect me like you expect Jesus.
           
          Join Date: Feb 2011
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          I'm 21. I'd say my minimum is 17 and my maximum is 25. I don't think I'd like to go more than four years above or below. Not while I'm this young as least. I think as you get older, age differences tend to matter less.
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            #1363    
          Old November 7th, 2011 (7:42 AM).
          oocyst's Avatar
          oocyst oocyst is offline
          SOFTware
           
          Join Date: Jul 2011
          Location: The Netherlands
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          I'm 17, My minimum is.. 15? and my maximum is 18. I want someone around my age so I can relate to them.
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          [23:02:33] oocyst: christos shut up
            #1364    
          Old November 7th, 2011 (8:07 AM).
          Ineffable~'s Avatar
          Ineffable~ Ineffable~ is offline
          DAT SNARKITUDE
           
          Join Date: Aug 2008
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          I prefer someone I can relate to, but like Scarf said, age otherwise doesn't matter much to me. I would like to say I would always follow the "your age minus seven, then doubled" rule (converse to the half plus seven rule) but honestly I just date whoever feels right to me. I probably wouldn't date anyone muchmuch younger than me simply since I'm approaching eighteen right now, but I guess anything could happen. As long as I can relate to the person well enough.
          __________________

          #077: Ponyta - The Fire Horse Pokémon
          Fire ~ Field eggs
          3'03" ~ 66.1lbs ~ 50/50

          Its hooves are 10 times harder
          than diamonds. It can trample
          anything completely flat in moments.

          Abilities: Run Away or Flash Fire or Flame Body
          Moves: Growl, Flame Wheel, Stomp, Agility
          Locations: Pokémon Mansion

          Cry

          Other names:

          jp: ポニータ (Ponyta)
          de: Ponita
          fr: Ponyta
          cn: 小火馬 (Xiǎohuǒmǎ)


            #1365    
          Old November 7th, 2011 (8:15 AM).
          -Jared-'s Avatar
          -Jared- -Jared- is offline
          Certified Responsible Adult
           
          Join Date: Mar 2009
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          Age: 27
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          What is you age? What is your age-range for dating (minimum/maximum)?

          Oops, I had no idea this topic was happening, xD.

          I am 20, and my range for dating would be 18-25, about. I won't discount the possibility of dating someone older, but I don't think it is likely. xD
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            #1366    
          Old November 7th, 2011 (2:20 PM).
          Kikyochanx's Avatar
          Kikyochanx Kikyochanx is offline
             
            Join Date: Oct 2011
            Location: USA
            Gender: Female
            Nature: Lax
            Posts: 29
            Count me in on joining this club. Never knew there was one in the social groups, but this also seems pretty cool. ^.^

            I'm bisexual, and I'm a female. Yes, people do know about me being bisexual. I have told friends, some family, and other people who I know online really well.
              #1367    
            Old November 7th, 2011 (2:35 PM).
            bubblebeam's Avatar
            bubblebeam bubblebeam is offline
            *splash*
               
              Join Date: Oct 2011
              Location: Cerulean City
              Age: 24
              Gender: Male
              Nature: Quirky
              Posts: 8
              Ooooh, I'd like to join!

              And to answer the question everyone seems to be answering, I'm 17, and would only go two years above or one year below. Most of the time I'd stay in a one year radius though, mainly because I have brothers older and younger in a two year radius of my age, and 1. I'd feel weird going out with someone in the same school year as my little brother, and 2. They don't know I'm gay, and would probably find out if I went out with someone their age.
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                #1368    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (4:04 PM).
              Shining Raichu's Avatar
              Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
              Expect me like you expect Jesus.
               
              Join Date: Feb 2011
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              Welcome to bubblebeam and Kikyochanx!! Adding your names into the member list now :)

              Also, another small win in the fight for our rights!

              I remember this caused outrage not too long ago, so I'm really glad to see it changing.
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                #1369    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (4:41 PM).
              Ineffable~'s Avatar
              Ineffable~ Ineffable~ is offline
              DAT SNARKITUDE
               
              Join Date: Aug 2008
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              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Shining Raichu View Post
              Also, another small win in the fight for our rights!

              I remember this caused outrage not too long ago, so I'm really glad to see it changing.
              I feel somewhat uncompelled to think of this as a real victory. It feels more like a non-loss, I mean seriously? Still no donating blood if you have had sex in the past year?
              I'll call it a win once the policies for all sexes/sexualities/gender identities (and all combinations of the three) are the exact same.

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Kikyochanx View Post
              Count me in on joining this club. Never knew there was one in the social groups, but this also seems pretty cool. ^.^

              I'm bisexual, and I'm a female. Yes, people do know about me being bisexual. I have told friends, some family, and other people who I know online really well.
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by bubblebeam View Post
              Ooooh, I'd like to join!

              And to answer the question everyone seems to be answering, I'm 17, and would only go two years above or one year below. Most of the time I'd stay in a one year radius though, mainly because I have brothers older and younger in a two year radius of my age, and 1. I'd feel weird going out with someone in the same school year as my little brother, and 2. They don't know I'm gay, and would probably find out if I went out with someone their age.
              ^^ Welcome to both of you! Have fun here and stay active!
              __________________

              #077: Ponyta - The Fire Horse Pokémon
              Fire ~ Field eggs
              3'03" ~ 66.1lbs ~ 50/50

              Its hooves are 10 times harder
              than diamonds. It can trample
              anything completely flat in moments.

              Abilities: Run Away or Flash Fire or Flame Body
              Moves: Growl, Flame Wheel, Stomp, Agility
              Locations: Pokémon Mansion

              Cry

              Other names:

              jp: ポニータ (Ponyta)
              de: Ponita
              fr: Ponyta
              cn: 小火馬 (Xiǎohuǒmǎ)


                #1370    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (5:49 PM).
              U.Flame's Avatar
              U.Flame U.Flame is offline
              Meowna Fan
               
              Join Date: Jun 2008
              Location: Sapphire City in future Hoenn
              Age: 23
              Gender: Male
              Nature: Jolly
              Posts: 1,272
              What the ****!? I found out that if you're not a citizen and you marry someone of the same sex (I believe this is before gay marrage became illegal) who is, you DON'T become one! So why is it that a straight marriagemakes a difference?
              __________________
              Hacks I'm working on:
              Pokemon Sapphire Hoenn's Rebirth - My own hack, making progress whenever possible.
              3rd Gen Multiplayer Project - Research and development, occasionally testing, sometimes with support.
              Pokemon Cursed/Creepy White - Group project, on hiatus for now with plans to return eventually.
              Animal Crossing Wild World playing as an animal - experimental, messing with models and textures

              Hacks I've worked on in the past:
              Pokemon Ruby Destiny Broken Timeline (pre-reboot) - Assisted with maps
              Pokemon HeartGold Prince Boo Edition - Experimental project with three small changes. Made at the request of YouTube LPer PrinceBoo21.

              Been super busy with work, life, and laptop problems. Hopefully I can get back into it soon, I fear I'm already rusty. Meanwhile I'm considering writing some of my hacks as a series of fanfics.

              Times I've been ninja'd: 18
              Times I've ninja'd people: 3
                #1371    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (6:05 PM).
              Esper's Avatar
              Esper Esper is offline
               
              Join Date: Jun 2009
              Location: California
              Posts: 10,761
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by U_Flame View Post
              What the ****!? I found out that if you're not a citizen and you marry someone of the same sex (I believe this is before gay marrage became illegal) who is, you DON'T become one! So why is it that a straight marriagemakes a difference?
              Double standard. I could try to elaborate, but that's really all it boils down to. Same-sex relationships don't get the same recognition and respect as opposite-sex relationships.

              Which country are you talking about, by the way? I know this is how it is in the US, but I'm sadly uninformed about other places.
              __________________
                #1372    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (6:18 PM).
              Ineffable~'s Avatar
              Ineffable~ Ineffable~ is offline
              DAT SNARKITUDE
               
              Join Date: Aug 2008
              Location: Any ol' place really
              Age: 24
              Gender: Female
              Nature: Naive
              Posts: 2,742
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
              Double standard. I could try to elaborate, but that's really all it boils down to. Same-sex relationships don't get the same recognition and respect as opposite-sex relationships.
              :(
              That's all that idea even deserves in response. Just a big giant frowny face.

              I'm honestly sometimes astounded by the kind of laws there are against gay/trans people. At least the whole marriage thing doesn't have some stupid fake reason behind it and it's a "just cuz" kind of thing.
              __________________

              #077: Ponyta - The Fire Horse Pokémon
              Fire ~ Field eggs
              3'03" ~ 66.1lbs ~ 50/50

              Its hooves are 10 times harder
              than diamonds. It can trample
              anything completely flat in moments.

              Abilities: Run Away or Flash Fire or Flame Body
              Moves: Growl, Flame Wheel, Stomp, Agility
              Locations: Pokémon Mansion

              Cry

              Other names:

              jp: ポニータ (Ponyta)
              de: Ponita
              fr: Ponyta
              cn: 小火馬 (Xiǎohuǒmǎ)


                #1373    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (6:45 PM).
              Shining Raichu's Avatar
              Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
              Expect me like you expect Jesus.
               
              Join Date: Feb 2011
              Location: Australia
              Age: 27
              Gender: Male
              Nature: Adamant
              Posts: 8,990
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Ineffable~ View Post

              I feel somewhat uncompelled to think of this as a real victory. It feels more like a non-loss, I mean seriously? Still no donating blood if you have had sex in the past year?
              I think we need to take the celebrations where we can get them. Just because the laws they're repealing are only really making society how it should have been all along, doesn't mean it's any less of a victory for equal rights or for the LGBT community. Even this law-reversal doesn't make things perfect, but it's a step in the right direction.
              __________________
              Moderator of General Chat
                #1374    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (7:01 PM). Edited November 7th, 2011 by U.Flame.
              U.Flame's Avatar
              U.Flame U.Flame is offline
              Meowna Fan
               
              Join Date: Jun 2008
              Location: Sapphire City in future Hoenn
              Age: 23
              Gender: Male
              Nature: Jolly
              Posts: 1,272
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Scarf View Post
              Double standard. I could try to elaborate, but that's really all it boils down to. Same-sex relationships don't get the same recognition and respect as opposite-sex relationships.

              Which country are you talking about, by the way? I know this is how it is in the US, but I'm sadly uninformed about other places.
              Yeah, I'm talking about the US.

              In my hack, I'll make it damn clear that gays are accepted in it! Not much of a spoiler, but the character Soneec marries her girlfriend at some point.

              Oh hey, speaking of gays in games, doesn't Link wear his earring on the "gay" side in Ocarina of Time? (Or was it a different game? I know it was Link.)
              __________________
              Hacks I'm working on:
              Pokemon Sapphire Hoenn's Rebirth - My own hack, making progress whenever possible.
              3rd Gen Multiplayer Project - Research and development, occasionally testing, sometimes with support.
              Pokemon Cursed/Creepy White - Group project, on hiatus for now with plans to return eventually.
              Animal Crossing Wild World playing as an animal - experimental, messing with models and textures

              Hacks I've worked on in the past:
              Pokemon Ruby Destiny Broken Timeline (pre-reboot) - Assisted with maps
              Pokemon HeartGold Prince Boo Edition - Experimental project with three small changes. Made at the request of YouTube LPer PrinceBoo21.

              Been super busy with work, life, and laptop problems. Hopefully I can get back into it soon, I fear I'm already rusty. Meanwhile I'm considering writing some of my hacks as a series of fanfics.

              Times I've been ninja'd: 18
              Times I've ninja'd people: 3
                #1375    
              Old November 7th, 2011 (7:26 PM).
              Shining Raichu's Avatar
              Shining Raichu Shining Raichu is offline
              Expect me like you expect Jesus.
               
              Join Date: Feb 2011
              Location: Australia
              Age: 27
              Gender: Male
              Nature: Adamant
              Posts: 8,990
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Snivy063 View Post
              I actually didn't get the thread title at first. T__T; But anyway, sign me up! :'3

              I'm still kind of confused with my gender, I'm trying to find an answer, so hopefully, I might get some here! :'D
              Oh my God I'm so sorry! I completely missed your post! Welcome to the Club, I'm sure we'll be able to help you with any question you might have for us :). Anyway sorry about that, adding your name to the list now!
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