Pokemon: Ultima Journey

Started by Monkey In Rehab September 1st, 2007 2:04 PM
  • 1255 views
  • 14 replies
Seen November 17th, 2007
Posted September 16th, 2007
55 posts
15.7 Years
Pokemon
Ultima
Journey!


-------------------
Comics
-------------------
Comic 1
Comic 2




Updates When Possible For Me.
Credits To *At The Moment*:
Spoiler:
Avatar
Matt Silver (For helping with crit)



Check out my Sprite Showcase
And My Deviant Art
----------------------
Pokemon Diamond Status
----------------------
Game: 18
Gender: Male
Pokemon: Bronzong Lv:49, Pellipper Lv:41, Chingling Lv:31, Zubat Lv:12, Bidoof Lv:11,
Egg.
Caught: 7
Seen: 14
Friend Code: 1332 5426 7105
Name: Bakashi

Age 31
Male
Where Giving Up Is Not An Option
Seen December 1st, 2014
Posted November 14th, 2010
947 posts
17.6 Years
Umm... the second link, next to Comic 1 is broken.
It is pretty good - rather original. Lets just sit and analyze for a second:
- Main characters: Good and all, but you need to edit them. I see you just have plainh sprites, and you should edit them.
- Credit: Give a list of credits on the first post. If you don't credit the people who made the original sprites or something, you might get in trouble.
- Plot: Awesome. Completely original to start, and keep on with that.
- Speech bubbles: Good, but the text is too cluttered together. That's an easy one to fix.
- Speech: YOur speech on the post is kind of negative. Assume that you suck, but dont write it. It might give readers the impression that you just want to be called the worst comiceer. You have good ideas, and are well executed right now.

Keep it up!
Seen November 17th, 2007
Posted September 16th, 2007
55 posts
15.7 Years
Thanks Matt, that helped alot.. I will try and get comic 2 up today. But i am going for a meal with friends so it may be a bit delayed. If so, could you tell me what a good font would be to use? And at what size?


Check out my Sprite Showcase
And My Deviant Art
----------------------
Pokemon Diamond Status
----------------------
Game: 18
Gender: Male
Pokemon: Bronzong Lv:49, Pellipper Lv:41, Chingling Lv:31, Zubat Lv:12, Bidoof Lv:11,
Egg.
Caught: 7
Seen: 14
Friend Code: 1332 5426 7105
Name: Bakashi

Seen November 17th, 2007
Posted September 16th, 2007
55 posts
15.7 Years
Sorry it took so long, i'm just slow at these things.
Comic 2


Check out my Sprite Showcase
And My Deviant Art
----------------------
Pokemon Diamond Status
----------------------
Game: 18
Gender: Male
Pokemon: Bronzong Lv:49, Pellipper Lv:41, Chingling Lv:31, Zubat Lv:12, Bidoof Lv:11,
Egg.
Caught: 7
Seen: 14
Friend Code: 1332 5426 7105
Name: Bakashi

Age 30
southern Cali., US
Seen October 5th, 2009
Posted October 1st, 2009
143 posts
15.7 Years
woah, i read these and theyre good dude
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http://pokevents.freeforums.org/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=2
^~~~^MY EVENT LIST^~~~^




FC: 1590 1795 8330





_~~**~~_Collector of Korean Events_~~**~~_
~~~~~~~**~~~~~~~

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
Why would Giovanni push off the hero, more importantly, Giovanni WOULD NOT go himself. Instead, he would send an admin, a minor one more likely. You need to make characters more realistic.

The dead girl and the friend share the same sprite, which is confusing, unless the friend IS the dead girl. Also, Giovanni and the Rockets come out of nowhere, and no one notices them when they push off the protagonist.

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]
Seen November 17th, 2007
Posted September 16th, 2007
55 posts
15.7 Years
Why would Giovanni push off the hero, more importantly, Giovanni WOULD NOT go himself. Instead, he would send an admin, a minor one more likely. You need to make characters more realistic.

The dead girl and the friend share the same sprite, which is confusing, unless the friend IS the dead girl. Also, Giovanni and the Rockets come out of nowhere, and no one notices them when they push off the protagonist.

@Angel, this is early on in the story. And if you read... its not giovanni.... its horatio. Horatio is his son that didn't get accepted into rocket, so when rocket went into hiding he made rocket reborn. The friend is the dead girl, she just isnt dead yet. Thats a bit obvious.


Check out my Sprite Showcase
And My Deviant Art
----------------------
Pokemon Diamond Status
----------------------
Game: 18
Gender: Male
Pokemon: Bronzong Lv:49, Pellipper Lv:41, Chingling Lv:31, Zubat Lv:12, Bidoof Lv:11,
Egg.
Caught: 7
Seen: 14
Friend Code: 1332 5426 7105
Name: Bakashi

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
Actually, it's not. There's no indicator >.<;;

Horatio, Giovanni, it's the same copied over-used sprite, and still, he would not go himself, nor would he go with so little. Rockets always come in numbers, even the GSC rival thinks so x3

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]
Seen November 17th, 2007
Posted September 16th, 2007
55 posts
15.7 Years
Well i take your crit, but well... at the end of the day, its my comic, my idea's, my rules


Check out my Sprite Showcase
And My Deviant Art
----------------------
Pokemon Diamond Status
----------------------
Game: 18
Gender: Male
Pokemon: Bronzong Lv:49, Pellipper Lv:41, Chingling Lv:31, Zubat Lv:12, Bidoof Lv:11,
Egg.
Caught: 7
Seen: 14
Friend Code: 1332 5426 7105
Name: Bakashi

Age 31
Male
Where Giving Up Is Not An Option
Seen December 1st, 2014
Posted November 14th, 2010
947 posts
17.6 Years
Well i take your crit, but well... at the end of the day, its my comic, my idea's, my rules
Dont get too defensive man. Angel has a little point - and I said earlier that you should change up your sprites a little to avoid confusion.

With Comic 2, I recommended just one little square in the corner of your first frame, labelled: "When Amy was alive..." or "_ years ago" or something like that, just to get the message through.

Comic 2 was really good. I like to understand what happened to her in greater detail, and a flashback format is always good. The speech bubbles have much improved, which I really like.

Three little words: "Keep. It. Up." :D