Day by Day...

Started by Burne Starcofski September 2nd, 2004 5:55 PM
  • 743 views
  • 4 replies
Age 33
Inside of my Mind...
Seen January 9th, 2006
Posted November 16th, 2005
491 posts
18.8 Years
The poems in my sig, sorry for not being able to post it. But tell me, is it good?
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Age 35
Band room
Seen December 26th, 2005
Posted November 10th, 2004
329 posts
18.8 Years
er, not really the kind of poetry I generally enjoy. It really doesnt tell me anything, don't get me wrong its well written for what it is, but yeah thats about it. Don't let me discourage you,just because it wasnt in my tastes doesn't mean it's not good....and it doesn't mean that you can't keep wiritng, which I strongly reccomend btw
"We must carry war into every corner the enemy happens to carry it, to his home, to his centers of entertainment:a total war. It is neccesary to prevent him from having a moment of peace, a quiet moment outside his barracks or even inside; we must attack him wherever he may be, make him feel like a cornered beast wherever he may move. then his moral fiber shall begin to decline, but we shall notice how signs of decadence begin to disappear."- Che Guevara

"shoot, coward, you are only going to kill a man"-Ernesto "Che" Guevara
Age 31
Tennesse -_-
Seen September 28th, 2013
Posted May 23rd, 2005
828 posts
19.7 Years
The poem is very... Vague and hazy. It could be extended and cleaned up a bit. The "day" metaphor could be lengthened and not as frequently used. There isn't much to say other than that. I'm very sorry for my constructive criticism.

Rogue: "What am I going to do with you Remy LeBeau?"
Gambit: "I have a list, but I left it in my other pants."
-- Astonishing X-Men #1

Rogue + Gambit
The Mississipian and the Lousianian Cajan, too cute together


--The Daily Post, the Xanga of Blaine--
Age 33
Inside of my Mind...
Seen January 9th, 2006
Posted November 16th, 2005
491 posts
18.8 Years
No problem. Thanks for it actually. I guess my friends were right, my poetry stinks.
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Age 31
Tennesse -_-
Seen September 28th, 2013
Posted May 23rd, 2005
828 posts
19.7 Years
Don't say that! Your poetry is just a diamond in the rough. Skill takes time to develop. Just do a bit of study of the masters and spend a bit more time and things will come to you. It will get easier and clearer. Really.

Rogue: "What am I going to do with you Remy LeBeau?"
Gambit: "I have a list, but I left it in my other pants."
-- Astonishing X-Men #1

Rogue + Gambit
The Mississipian and the Lousianian Cajan, too cute together


--The Daily Post, the Xanga of Blaine--