Ride My Train

Started by SamuraiMaster April 6th, 2009 8:44 PM
  • 753 views
  • 5 replies

SamuraiMaster

and his son, Layne (Buizel).

Age 32
Male
Colorado
Seen December 16th, 2013
Posted July 25th, 2011
727 posts
14.7 Years
I wrote this song, I think it's a very touching beautiful song. It is a either a rock ballad, a blues song, or maybe even folk music. I am not too sure yet, but the song is about the afterlife, despite it's title.

A man is on a train and he can't leave it. The train travels the entire world. This man is the soul who is not in heaven or hell, but stuck on Earth. Or if you wanna call it purgatory, go ahead. He has tried time and time again to leave the train, but he cannot. He yearns to see his lover again, and can is very sad.

Give me some feedback on what you think. If you wanna know what influenced me to write this...nothing much. A just saw a trainyard and decided to write a train song. Plus my concert band recently played the song "Ghost Train." When writing this, I had the tune of the Metallica cover "Turn the Page" stuck in my head.


Ride My Train

Rolling down the cold steel tracks
Staring out into space
Moonlit nights your only friend
Riding the steady pace
Don't feel much like sleeping
Just wish the night would never end.

Smoke your final ciggerettes
Not a word is said
Sitting at the boxcar door
Snow plains all but dead
No way to see the projected path
Impossible to see what's around the bend.

[chorus]

And I ride, ride forever more
Yes I ride, all alone
Won't you try, try to catch this train?
Won't you ride, ride my train?


No way to stop this motherload
This train of human souls
Won't ride in hell or ride through heaven
As the cemetery bell now tolls
It's stuck on Earth 'til Judgement Day
With it's haul of other lonely men.

These men I cannot see or hear
Dead to them as they are to me
Men and women and children too,
Some of majesty
The train, it stops to collect a soul
But then it starts to roll again.

[chorus]
And I ride, ride forever more
Yes I ride, all alone
Won't you try, try to catch this train?
Won't you ride, ride my train?


[bridge verse]
I've tried time and time again
To jump this never-ending ride
I jump out in the wilderness
And I'm on my own
But the train, it always finds me
No matter how far from the tracks I roam

The train's always been kind to me
Despite my escape attempts
Never have I hated the train
Despite my weeping soul
I just yearn to see her once again
The woman I loved and had to leave!

[quiet]
The train stops by my body's grave
One time every year
I get out and walk to my lover's soul
She'ss unaware that I'm near
I try in vain to talk to her
I just cannot let it be...

The train then blows it's whistle
As if to call me home
My lover seems to hear this call
The locomotive's mighty tone
I start to move out once again
Yearning for her to come to me!

[brief silence followed by a solo]
Oh! Oh! Oh!
[chorus]
And I ride, ride forever more
Yes, I ride, all alone
Can't you try, try to catch this train?
Won't you ride, ride with me!

Oh! Oh! Yeah!

Oh, I ride! Ride my train again!
Over mountain tops, through the sea!
Oh please try, my love, try to join with me!
Won't you ride, please ride with me,
On my train?

©2009
My Buizel is not amused with your foolishness.

Mystery Dungeon: Through the Never
I'd appreciate any reviews on my fic.

Vie

...

germany
Seen March 17th, 2011
Posted December 24th, 2010
1,113 posts
15.7 Years
I think its great, I love the chorus and the ending. what instruments do you play with it? It could be wonderful with a steel string acoustic guitar :3
If there is a light in everybody, send out your ray of sunshine.
7.4.2010 - My babygirl, my beautiful mess.

Tunaboy88

Special Beam Cannon!!!!!!!!!!!

Planet Namek! What Don't Believe Me?
Seen December 7th, 2009
Posted November 23rd, 2009
249 posts
14.4 Years
to me it seems like more of a song than a Poem


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Age 30
Male
New York City
Seen May 21st, 2016
Posted May 16th, 2016
3,597 posts
15.9 Years
to me it seems like more of a song than a Poem
Read the first post
& a song is a poem~
lurid/lucid

"I want to tear myself from this place, from this reality, rise up like a cloud and float away, melt into this humid summer night and dissolve somewhere far, over the hills. But I am here, my legs blocks of concrete, my lungs empty of air, my throat burning. There will be no floating away."

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whoever disabled my signature:
my signature is not even close to 300px tall.
i dont understand why it was disabled.

SamuraiMaster

and his son, Layne (Buizel).

Age 32
Male
Colorado
Seen December 16th, 2013
Posted July 25th, 2011
727 posts
14.7 Years
I think its great, I love the chorus and the ending. what instruments do you play with it? It could be wonderful with a steel string acoustic guitar :3

I'm a drummer.

I have a blues type of sensation with this song. Some folk elements maybe. I had the song "Turn the Page" stuck in my head while writing this.
My Buizel is not amused with your foolishness.

Mystery Dungeon: Through the Never
I'd appreciate any reviews on my fic.