Actually, since everything is spelled correctly (even Prolog) in OpenOffice, I'd say that this does meet the basic standards of PFF&P. It's not a script-fic. The grammar (with the exception of how to make a paragraph on a forum and one proof-reading mistake I found) is good. The only thing missing is more description to make it better, and that's something he can fix.
So I'm not going to close it, because it's obvious that Emp395 just needs some simple guidance on description, and a few other pointers.
Like, for instance: Emp395, to create a proper paragraph in your story, hit the Enter button twice. If you already knew this, and saw that your paragraphing was stripped when it was posted, then you should hit "Preview Post" before submitting the post to make sure that everything is all right.
I'll also add that you should include more narration between your dialogue. Describe what the characters look like a bit better, what they're doing, and how they're feeling. Kind of like what the last sentence of your prologue is.
But don't let this get you down, nor Feign's scare tactic. You're doing quite well for your age, and I hope you continue to post more.
Thanks, well, with your tips, I'll make this chapter better. BTW, this is not my first fanfic, this is a prequel to one, just thought I could point it out.
Chapter One: Trip to Cobalt Town
The day of the moving has come, it was dawn. Spencer was just finished packing his stuff. His room was full of boxes. He put his encyclopedia of Pokémon, a big bar of Moo Moo Chocolate, some and his PokéGear in his backpack for when he's on the ship. Spencer's mother then entered Spencer room.
"Spencer, I know how you like the Daycare Couple, so I got you this." In her hand was an egg, brown in color, with a curvy spot in the middle.
"A Pokémon Egg! Thanks mom!" Spencer held the egg very carefully, and put it down. He took out his encyclopedia and surfed through.
"Son, we're going now!" his dad called through the window. Spencer took the egg and his boxes with him, and went to the car. The went to Canalave City, where they will be riding on boat. A man wearing a sailor suit greeted the family.
"Aw, you must be the party going to Cobalt Town! Name's Eldritch, I will be your captain."
They then went into the ship. Spencer decided to be in the ship's cargo, to take care of his egg. Spencer decided to rest there, but suddenly the egg was glowing. Coming out was a Bidoof.
"Wow a Bidoof! I know we will be good friends! I'll name you Ben!" Spencer then looked through his bag and pulled out his Moo Moo Chocolate bar, and fed some to Ben. Spencer then saw that Ben was thirsty, and pulled out some Moo Moo Milk. Ben was tired so Spencer got his Poké Gear and played channel 7.5, where a lullaby played, Spencer tucked Ben in his sweater to keep him warm. When Spencer awoke, the ship reached Cobalt Town. He then picked up Ben, and carried him. "We're here Ben, here is your new home. Not much like Solaceon, but dad said I won't have to worry about moving again, let's make the best out of this, okay Ben." Ben then squeaked on agreeing.
To Be Continued
So how do you like that?