How do you cope with bad news?

Started by Nick October 16th, 2009 7:03 PM
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  • 30 replies

Nick

Seen 3 Weeks Ago
Posted July 28th, 2021
17,572 posts
18.6 Years
Bad news of any kind is very unpredictable and, once delivered, very hard to deal with. Many people indulge in behavior they normally wouldn't to deal with the bad news given to them. Whether it be a tragic piece of information given to you by a loved one, information on a current situation that occurred in a state bordering yours, or something far less serious like you losing your job. There's no question that bad news and unfortunate events are just unavoidable. My question for you is how do you normally deal with bad news? Do unfortunate events that happen around the world affect you directly?

Of course there's the typical denial, thinking what's happening is a dream and everything, but is there anything out of the norm that you do to handle whatever bad news you get to find a way to accept it or at least cope with the news given (for better or worse)? Perhaps it's spending your time isolated on the computer? Or maybe spending every single dollar you have on clothes or other material belongings?

Hiidoran

ohey

Age 32
Male
Indiana
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted February 4th, 2022
6,203 posts
17.6 Years
Whenever I get handed bad news, I tend to just bottle myself up in a private place and think about it - sort it all out. I used to go in my room, lock the door, and listen to some music, but I now share a room with another person, so that doesn't work out too well. :x

Since I've been in college, I've found that going for walks around the campus is a really good way to get that solitude I crave. Sure, there are people about, but they don't notice me and I don't really notice them.

As for world events effecting me directly, I'd have to go with no. It's not like I don't stop and think about the plight of the world and its people every now and again, but I just figure there isn't much I can do as a single person. I just try to live my life in the most positive manner I can and just hope for the best, really. Donate to charity when I can, and try to better myself for the good of society. Hope it does something...

Her

Age 29
Seen 3 Hours Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
Badly, to be frank. I was never good at coping with anything too far outside the norm, though there are exceptions. Those happen rarely, however. Depending on how bad it is, it takes me a while to comprehend it and longer to try sort it out or get over it, different situations for different news. Most of the time it is, as you said, being isolated on the computer, preferring the comfort of the internet to the darkness which I perceive after hearing bad news. Call me weak, morbid, lonely but thats the way I prefer to settle things. I'm not a very strong person, I can get crushed easily and then I can be the crusher, but some things can slice me like a hot knife through butter.
Seen January 4th, 2013
Posted October 21st, 2011
1,804 posts
13.8 Years
It depends on the bad news. If I am presented an unpleasant but fixable situation, I'll try to mend things back to normal. If I hear about world suffering, I become inspired to help out in any way I can. If something happens that I can't do anything about, I move on.

I have noticed one prominent habit I resort to every time someone close to me dies, and that's eating more. A lot of people lose their appetites in a time of grief, but I tend to become very agitated and use food as a remedy to calm my nerves. (I remain careful about what I eat, though.)

Bay

She/They
Dani California
Seen 2 Hours Ago
Posted 3 Hours Ago
6,347 posts
17 Years
I'm not great with coping bad news. Usually I over analyze bad news too much and then become so emotional it'll take me a while to become okay again, even the littlest things. However, if I'm able too, I'll either read a book or listen to music. Those two usually keep my mind busy. Luckily at least I'm able to cope better.
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Miz en Scène

Everybody's connected

Male
The Wired
Seen 2 Days Ago
Posted August 30th, 2016
1,645 posts
14.7 Years
It depends on the seriousness. If it's not so serious, I just suck it up and sit bottled up in my room. Or, I think about it too much and It kind of dominates my thoughts actually.

Or if someone died, I'd cry. D:
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Seen December 26th, 2009
Posted December 24th, 2009
319 posts
13.8 Years
I get to a place where can I be alone whether it be my room, or a walk through the park. I sort the matter out in my head. Often times I come to a feasible solution. But those that I don't, I tend to mull of for a few more days.

Of course, some times I completely forget about it. All I'll remember is that there was something I should have been worrying about :/
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Guillermo

i own a rabbit heh

Age 28
Australia
Seen April 11th, 2015
Posted May 18th, 2014
6,794 posts
14.8 Years
It depends how bad the news is. If it was something relating to a death of someone close to me then I'll cry. If it's just something small like failing a test, then it's nothing I get extremely sad over.

Most of the time I'll just go somewhere I enjoy and talk with my friends. Music also tends to help, too. Sometimes I'll think of positives that can come out of the situation at hand.
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Citrinin

Nephrotoxic.

Age 26
Male
New Zealand
Seen August 2nd, 2010
Posted July 19th, 2010
2,778 posts
13.9 Years
I used to be really unable to deal with bad news and take it out on everyone around me. x_x; Now, I try to internalise it and sort it out myself privately. (This, of course, is under the assumption that I can't change the circumstances. If I can, I will do everything I can to reverse it.)
~

twocows

The not-so-black cat of ill omen

Age 32
Male
Michigan
Seen February 19th, 2023
Posted April 30th, 2021
4,307 posts
14.2 Years
I punch enemies of the motherland in the face with my STALINFIST! Oh ho ho!

No, but seriously, I usually just go isolate myself somewhere until I cool down. Unless it's really bad news, in which case I get on with my life and deal with it as I go.
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Age 29
Seen November 5th, 2017
Posted November 5th, 2017
3,499 posts
14.8 Years
I basically shut down; I eat far less often, I stop talking to people as often and when I do speak then it's pretty obvious something's up because I'm out of character, I'll have trouble sleeping aswell. It might last a few days, sometimes longer.
It would have to be pretty awful news for that to happen though. Luckily for me, I don't get real 'bad news' often.

Serene Grace

Pokémon Trainer

Age 28
Male
England
Seen September 25th, 2016
Posted December 31st, 2014
3,424 posts
14.1 Years
The only thing bad news that I remember recieving was when my great grandmother died when I was ten. Now, you'll normally expect any ten year old to get depressed or not cope with it, as normal youngsters do with bad news. I was different though, the first thought that came to my mind was "It's life, these things happen and the best way to cope with it is to move on". I cried for a little bit in memory of her but by the next two days, I was alright. I guess I am quite good with dealing with bad news and that I'm happy for.

Honest

Hi!

Age 27
Male
New York City
Seen March 19th, 2023
Posted November 7th, 2022
11,676 posts
14.7 Years
Depends really. If is death... I deny it. It sinks in later and I get sad

If its something like breaking up with your GF/BF... I deny it even more, in my head. I try to act nice as long as possible. If it doesn't hold... the possiblities are endless...
he did it, not me.

Gunn

horror resident

Female
California, United States
Seen March 5th, 2022
Posted July 7th, 2012
1,403 posts
17.9 Years
The real question for me is: why does bad news spread more quickly?

But anyway, I kind of have to eh,... visualize, I guess, to actually understand bad news. Then I find someone close and discuss about it. I'll go to bed the same night and continue to think of it, creating my own sort of scenarios and play them out in my mind. Of course, I'm an optimist, so I always believe some sort of good will play out.
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Seen September 30th, 2012
Posted July 11th, 2012
3,529 posts
14.6 Years
I bottle all my negativity up inside me, and put on a happy front. ^_^ I know it's unhealthy, but someone needs to be positive in order to help any others who might be affected.
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-

Female
UK
Seen January 10th, 2015
Posted June 3rd, 2012
1,701 posts
14.1 Years
I'm the type who bottles everything up, and keeps it there. I hate being vulnerable or being seen to be vulnerable, so I keep what you call is a 'strong front'.

It works pretty well. If I don't talk about it, it goes away mostly, or I just end up forgetting.
Age 33
Female
England
Seen December 12th, 2009
Posted December 4th, 2009
49 posts
13.6 Years
Depends on the bad news.. if its a death in the family, I tend to go very quiet but it doesn't sink in at all and I'll be fine for a few days, and then.. around and after the funeral is when it tends to really hit home for me.

I do tend to prefer to seclude myself when I'm dealing with this kind of stuff though, I hold back infront of other people and end up just bottling it otherwise.
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