holiday [p. 1]

Started by Mika December 11th, 2009 9:36 PM
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  • 1 replies

Mika

もえじゃないも

Female
Seen February 11th, 2013
Posted June 11th, 2011
1,034 posts
17.5 Years
[Tried free-form poetry here as was inspired by Ellen Hopkins. >>;

Idk, just tried it. It's technically fiction, was trying a story idea in a new way so...yeah. I will be continuing this.

and asty said to post this here >>;;; So don't eat me.]

2 A.M. Phone. Call.


a fumbled hand

reaching from under

a mass of cloth

groping around in the dark

searching for the phone

that was incessantly ringing.



A glance at the clock.

It was well after ten,

I'd wanted to

get to bed early

but it didn't seem likely.



Once it Shut Up

Only a text message.

From him again.

Things were falling apart.

He needed help.

Was I free?

Of course I was.

When could I be over?

Immediately?

Okay.

Would he come let me in?

Sure, but I'd half to cross campus to him

Alone?

Alone. If that was alright.

That's fine.

I'd be right over.



Grabbing the Keys

Hanging up the phone,

I stood up and wiggled

into clothing that was more

appropriate than the sweats

for being around the opposite sex.



I'd wanted to get

to sleep early but that

was obviously, clearly

not happening now.

never did when

it was like this

when I was needed

Hair pulled up tight

into a tail

Sweatshirt pulled over

my head.

October was chilly.




Four Hours Later

crisis avoided

plan put in action

to fix things.

back in my own room

couldn't stay at his

had to walk back alone.

same old same old.



crawl in bed

pull the covers

over head



breathe

sleep

rinse

and repeat the next day.



Would He

talk to me

outside the dorms?

Probably not.

Maybe.

Patronizingly.

But it could be worse.

Happened quite often.

But still it was manageable

That's how

I'd get through it.

Smile and manage.



Two Weeks Later

everything was fixed

life was so good

for him and for me

a big breakthrough

he'd said, I'd said

closer still they'd become

but now the glass dripped

the sand bits of time and

now it was quiet

no longer got calls

to hang out

when

the weather

was poor

or good

or anything

in between.



Why then

I do this

is questionable

knowing that

it would stop

the 2 am calls

and 3 am talk-downs

I could do

other things

meet

other people

ah

if only life

was that simple


Nothing


I say when people

stick their nose in my face

and mention the things i'd

like to erase

I know they don't care

They're just saving face

Everyone knows

when the light is too weak

people skip out

they can't handle

the beat.



H1N1

the big nasty pig

he'd been sick

his fever'd been high

I'd sat with him

in the dark

when his girl

could not

but now I

was the one

who was sick

in the bed

and he never stopped by



Teachers

preach

mercy

to stay

safe at home

get better, rest up

drink fluids

don't worry

don't fret

just rest



they also

say

faker

grow up

you're not sick

move on

push forward

or just quit



I wasn't

always alone

I wasn't

always by myself.


Sometimes

friends would come by

Sometimes

they would pop by



after being tormented

after being whined at



or

if

they wanted to

make a withdrawl

from the

sur-

-charge

free

ATM

i'm the only one

in town

who is free

the others will charge you

$3.50

plus tax



You know?

When you put the

information

for the card

in the boxes on

paypal

They ask

'Can we have the security code?'

'The expiration date?'

'No ma'am, infinity'

Is not an actual number

Because in the real world

things expire.




When

I was good

I was bad

when

I was okay

I was lying

when

I was sad

I would smile

when

I was alone

you were right.


One day it hit me

like a bullet

or maybe a chance

either way it hurt

but it woke me up



I mean

who doesn't wake up

when you hear the sound

of a bullet ripping through

the air above your head?

it's a sickening

sound

especially

in d major



I knew it then

The thoughts

I'd suppressed

The feelings

I'd hid

The knowing

I'd pushed away

I knew it then


It'd come back

It'd come back

like

a



y

o



o

y.




I've always

tried to deny it

I've always

tried to forget it

I've always

tried to pretend

I've always

tried to fight it

I've always

known I know it



Holidays

aren't supposed to be hated

time away

from school from work for play

legalized laziness

not something

people should hate

but I honestly

hate them



Mistletoe


comes with the holiday

I hate most of all

Put it up

wander under

and

if someone else

meets you there

kiss and tell

but

kissing your hand

hurts.



Smiling

when i say goodbye

watch you and

your #2

leave in tandem

a smile

a wave

a goodbye

shut the door

lean

against the back

slip

slip

slide

touching the floor

the threat of

moisture

too much to bear

standing up



Sometimes

I don't want to let

her go back to you

my friend too

you know?

I don't like to share

I

share with you

I'm alone

You

share with me

you have others

but

I have to



Good Girls


aren't selfish

Good girls

don't over-wish

Good Girls

smile through sorrow

Good Girls

get up tomorrow

Good Girls

never cry

Good Girls

always lie